SULLIVAN JHLFE REPUBLICAN. W. M. CHENEY, Publisher. VOL. XII. The marriage rate in England is lower at present than ever before. A geographical export estimates the fertile portion of the earth's surface at '20,260,200 square miles and the barren region at 22,960,00 square miles. Russia is the only country from which there has been an increased im migration into the United States dur ing tho last ten months, notes the Rochester Post-Express. Onr trade with tho Hawaiian Isl ands twenty years ago amounted to only $1,631,580 ; but for the last fis cal year exports and imports were valued at nearly twelve million dol lars. Competent authority, even in Eu ropean countries, is unanimous in the view that the wild flowers of America are the finest iu the world, yet, la ments the Detroit Free Press, Ameri cans know practically nothing about them. The Protestant population of all Europe is about 50,000,000, or equal to that of the United States ; but while continental Europe has only about eight per cent, of the Sunday-schools of the world, tho United States has forty-nine per cent., or nearly ono half! Henry Laboucliere says in London Truth:"The reading public maybe divided into three classes : Those who read and remember; they are few. Those who read and forget; they are many. Those who read little or noth ing, and they are most. Tho original writer of to-day belongs to the first class, and, it may lie said, ho writes for the others." There has recently been some dis pute as to the authorship of the song "The Vacant Chair," which has been sung all over the world for nearly thirty years. Tho Watchman, of Bos ton, says it was written by the Hon. Henry S. Washburn, in memory of Lieutenant J. William Grout, who was shot in tho retreat from Ball's Bltifl. The song was first printed in the Worcester (Mass.) Spy. According to the Glasgow (Scotland) News it appears that the latest statis tics issued by the German Imperial Health Department give to Berlin the honor of being tho healthiest city in the world. The death-rate is given as only 16.3 per 1000. The unhealthiest city is Alexandria, which, despite its unvarying fine weather, its 300 foun tains and its soft sea breezes, has a death-rate of no less than 52.9 per 1000. Professor Richard L. Garner is cer tainly an enthusiast in his investiga tion of the language of the simians. Speaking of his recent visit to Africa, he said: "The world at large expects too much. People seem to insist .ipon it as their right that I should goto the gorilla country, spend a few months there, and return with a comptete dictionary to the gorilla language. Why, if I were sure of learning eventhree words a year, I would forsake triends and family, goto Africa and devote the rest of my life to n study that yielded such rich results in the present and promised such im mense possibilities for the future." not only in Japan that, incom- doctors are punished for pro fessional failure resulting in tho loss of lifo of their patients, but in Russia also, where physicians are held simi larly responsible. A woll-known medi cal practitioner at St. Petersburg has jttst boen sentenced to seven days' im prisonment, to a lino of 1000 rubles ftnd to the payment of an annuity of 300 rubles to a lady who was injure 1 by liis unskilful treatment. Russia is already lamentably deficient as far as tho number of Its medical men is con cerned, and this somewhat drastic punishment is scarcely of a character to increase the popularity of tli* pro fession. Uaptaiu Moore, of the sailing ship Mary Gibbs, tells a suggestive story of Ills last voyage. Me was from Boston to the gold coast of Africa, and his Cargo consisted of New England rum. Oddly en ough, lie also took out AM pas- Hangers two woiueu missionaries, who had been sent out to exert a civilizing and Christianizing influence on these benigted people. The brigantine stopped at thirteen ports to unload the Cargo of ruin, which was received with %ild enthusiasm by the natives, while ttobody seemed to want the mission ari«a. Tim latter S«MIUI I <liscour*gsd, but nevertheless well! stoutly to work to counteract the efleets of the rum Itefore he could lull what sqeeeae they Ware bavin* the tlibU sailed for IKMB*. Almost seventy-five per cent, of the men manning the British mercantile marine are foreigners. Forty-four out of every hundred persons in the United States are agriculturists; fifty-six in Canada, forty-eight in France, seventeen in Germany and seven in England. The United States maintains in China one hundred and thirteen mis sionary stations, quite forgetting tho fact that China maintains, in Califor nia alone, forty heathen temples. Mark Twain asserts that there are less than fifty original jokes in exis tence, all the others being simply modifications of these. There are only seven notes of music, but we get a great variety of harmony out of them. Our t-iade with Japan is falling oft. In 1891 38.25 per cent, of the goods exported by that country came to the United States; but in 1893 only 31.49 per cent. In 1891 10.87 per cent, of all the goods bought by Japan came from this country ; but in 1893 only 6.91 per cent. A triumph of art over nature was illustrated recently when a well-known English artist made a painting of some old beech trees in a Kent pasture, which he sold for SI4OO. The owner of the pasture sold his land and the trees together for SSOO, and called it a good sale at that. United States Consul Penfield, at Cairo, says that Egypt is aggressively comparing in a small way with us, not only in Europe, but at home, in sup plying raw cotton, and the consump tion of Egyptain cotton by New Eng land spindlers has grown from noth ing, ten years ago, to more than 60,- 000 bales, and valued at $3,000,00;.). Within a few mouths Pekin will bo united by wire with St. Petersburg, and, in consequence, with the tele graph system of the entire civilized world. According to the lat»st issue of the Turkestan Gazette, the telegraph line from Pekin has been brought as far west as the city of Kashgar. The European end of the line is at Osh, and a small stretch of about 140 miles now alone breaks the direct telegraphic communication from the Atlantic to the Pacific. The Secretary of the Interior has given up the experiments which the Government has been making for som ) years past to in dice rain over arid tracts. The railroad companies opera ting in New Mexico and Arizoua will, however, continue experiments aloug this line. Getting blood out of a turnip would not bo a difficult opera tion if the plebian vegetable contained blood, and so artificial methods might precipitate moisture iu the form of rain if there were any in tho atmos phere, but there are places where the air is as moistureless as a live fish in a lime basket, and neither powder nor dynamite can shako out of it what it does not hold. Tho exhibition epidemic is raging the world over. Not only have all the capitals of Europe some kind of an in ternational show running this year, but very many of tho smaller cities have an exhibition on their hands. Tho United Exhibitions at Milan were opened on May 6. They comprise ten exhibitions, of fine arts, oils, wines, and other specialities. An Interna tional Sanitary and Health Exhibition is to be held in Boulogne from July to September next. An International Exhibition opens in Bucharest on August '26 ami closes November 12. Aud now Tasmania comes forward with an invitation to the world to partici pate in an International Exhibition at Hobart on November 15 next. The balance sheet of tho Suez Canal just issued cannot fail in the opinion of the New York Tribune to be most satisfactory to tho English nation, which, thanks to the foresight of Lord Ueaconsfield, secured a controlling voice iu the management of the prop erty. The aggegate of uearly 8,000, 000 tons of shipping that have passed through the cMual during the Usual year that has just closed exceeds even the most sanguine estimates of Ferdi nand d« Lesseps, aud ill view of the fact that the vast majority of the ves sels passiug through the caual were of l.iigltsh register, there being nearly 3000 British ships as compared with 170 French, the llritisli directors have doiio the right slid gtacefnl thing in moving for and securing a vote tusk ing adequate all I generous provision foi the «i(« and family of the now moribund and completely ruined orig matoi of this magnificent enterprise, Ferdinand de Ussepa LAPORTE, PA., FKIDAY, JULY 27, 1894. THE CLOVF.R. Soma sing of tho lily and daisy nnl rose, And the pansles nnd pinks that tho summer time throws In the green, grassy lap of the medder that lays, Bllnktn' up at the skies, through the sun shiny days ; But what Is the Illy and all of tho rest Of the flowers to a man with a heart In his breast, That lias sipped, brlmmln' full of the honey and dew, Of the sweet clover blossoms his boyhood knew? I never set hevey on a clover field now, Or fool round a stable or climb In a mow, But my childhood comes back just as clear and as plain As the smell of the clover I'm sntffln' again ; And I wander away, in a barefooted dream, Where I tangled my toes in the blossoms that gleam With the dew of tho dawn of the morning of love, Ere It wept o'er the graves that I'm weeping above. And so I love clover. It seems like a part Of tho sacredest sorrows and joys of my heart; A I*l whenever it blossoms, oh ! there let me bow, And thank the good Lord as I'm thankin' Him now, And pray to Him still for the strength, when I die, Togo out In tho clover and tell it good-by, And lovingly nestle my face in its bloom, While my soul slips away on a breath of perfume. —.Tames Whitcomb Riley. ImNTEjoiT BY GODFREY QUARLES. fOBERT HARRIS was his right name, but in honor of his calling we all calleil him "Monte Bob." I well remember liis advent among the citizens of Lone Horse Gulch. It was in '57, just after a rich find had made the heretofore isolated and lonely gulch famous in a day, and caused the eager gold-seekers to pour in from all quarters. He was at that time very young. His fresh, boyish face had apparently never made the acquaintance of a razor. His blue eyes were round nnd laugh ing, and his mass of jet black hair, fine and soft as silk, would have been an enviable source of beauty to any woman. His figure was slight and youthful, and strongly suggestive of the truant school boy. A single day served to make the newcomer a citizen of Lone Horse Gulch, and soon after his arrival "The Kid," as he was called, on ac count of his boyish ways, his soft white hands and apparent inability to work, was known to the whole camp. Every one liked him; but when one night he won five thousand from one of Frisco's most noted sport ing men, and pocketed the money wit h careless indifference, his reputation was made; pity was changed to ad miration ; Lone Horse Gulch was en thusiastic, and its citizens to a man vied in doing honor to the new found hero. From that day forth he became a leading citizen, and the faro bank which he soon after set up was well patronized. Like many others, "Monte Bob" was very reticent in regard to his past history. He was frequently the re cipient of letters bearing an Eastern postmark. Some were directed in the weak, nervous hand peculiar to wo men of advancing years; tho rest in the round, graceful hand of a school girl. But it was a noticeable fact, vouched for by the postmaster, a gen tleman of unquestionable veracity, that "Monte Bob," though he always read them carefully, very seldom re plied to the letters received. But, as the postmaster had been a heavy loser at Bob's faro bank, these state ments in regard to his neglect of his private correspondence were received with a marked grain of allowance. On the other hand, the agent of the Wells, Fargo & Company express line, a gen tleman of equal standing in the com munity, asserted that "Monte Bob" often sent large sums of money to a certain Mrs. John Harris in the East. This statement was made before a crowd of citizens at the Eureka Ha loon, where the testimony of the post master in regard to the domestic af fairs of "a well-known business man" were undergoing careful examination. The trusted agent of the great exnress company was a warm admirer of the youthful gambler, and always con cluded this evidence of his hero's re deeming qualities by saying: "And you may bet yer boots, he sends that thar money to liia old mother back in the States; and ten to one he is the only galoot in this yer camp that does do it." And a large majority of the camp Acquiesced iu this opinion. At an early period "Monte Bob" allowed that he was a public minded citizen aud deeply interested in the welfare of Louo Horse Gulch. When it was determined that the spiritual welfare of the town was sadly neglect ed aud that a place of public worship was one of the prime needs, he was the first to head the building subscription with a handsome sum ; ami when the young preacher fell sick of fever and after a long sickness died, "Monte Hob" took upon himself the task o| seeing that he was decently buried and that all the debts incurred by bis aickueaa wer» paid Then 111 a quiet way tie furnished the weak, frail willow lliuana With which sl|« reached kiit llieuda iu th« hast. And, again, when the dread scourge, smallpox, lifcoko out in tho camp and scores of strong men sickened and died, unmindful of danger, "Monte Bob" put to shame those who had (led in fear, by closing his bank and uurs ing those around him as tenderly and carefully as any woman. When the scourge died away and those who had flod came back, he returned oner more to his fascinatiug calling and was never heard to mention the good work he had done. Like many other mining townc, in two short years Lone Horse Gulch saw its inception, its glory and its decay, One by one the bars petered out. The dissatisfied miners were forced to seek newer and more paying fields of labor, and I lost sight of "Monte Bob." Five years had passed and I was la boring on one of tho well known Sac ramento dailies as city editor. In the hurry and rush of daily journalism the old life at Lone Horse Gulch had long since become a thing of the past, when suddenly several things occurred to bring it back, fresh and vivid, to mind; forgoing to my duties at an early hour one morning, I chanced to overtako my old friend "Moute Bob." The flight of time had left its shadow upon him, and he was changed. A heavy moustacho coveted the smooth lip. Tho rakish high hut had been dis carded, the shiny suit of broad cloth had been supplemented by a plain business suit, and the dazzling dia mond had disappeared. He was taller, his shoulders broader and his step firmer than when last we met. The dashing, reckless gambler of five years before was gone, and his place had been taken by a quiet, earnest man. He knew me, and by the hearty, cor dial pressure of his hand, I knew was glad to meet me. He talked freely of the old life at the Gulch, and of those who hail been our companions there. We chatted for a few moments and then I left him at the door of a well knewn business house with au invita tion to come and see me. That very af ternoon I learned from another old citizen of the Gulch that he had long since abandoned the life of a gambler, and was now and had been for two years working as a bookkeeper. And let me say that my informant was none other than "Monte Bob's" warm friend, the old-time express agent at the Gulch. I also had it from that gentlemau, that u larger portion of the young man's wages was regular sent to his mother and sister in the East. Contrary to mv expectation, Bob availed himself of the invitation I had extended to him, and soon after spent an evening with mo in my cosy bach elor apartments. I found him au in telligent and pie;- ant companion. Besides reading much he had been a shrewd observer of men; and in the flow of conversation the evening slipped away before we were awaio of it. When he arose togo it had been arranged that he should spend au evening of every week with me. In the months that followed our acquain tance ripened into friendship; from friends we became confidants, and ere long I kuew the history of his past life. His father had died when he was a mere boy, leaving him to the care of an uncle. Until twenty his life was passed at his uncle's house and at school. Lacking the kind, watchful care of a father and deprived by cir cumstances of the loving thoughtful ness of a mother, he had been led astray by the influences which sur round tho youth of a great city. In the course of time ho became heavily indebted to a gambler, and fearing exposure, he had forged his uncle's check to the amount of several hun dred dollars, hoping to replace the money ere his uncle should learn what he had done. This he failed to do — and when his crime became known, he was forced to flee the couutry to save himself from a felon's cell. By his mother he was given money to aid him in his flight, and had come to California. Made reckless and des perate, he had first adopted tho gain ing table as a means of support, and with what success I well knew. Tho money given him by his mother and that taken from his undo had been promptly retnred. Ho had also paid for the education of his young sister aud enabled his mother, who has lost most of lier property, to livo in com fort. Her love had always followed him, and through her entreaties and the promptings of his own better self he had given up drink and abandoned the gaming table. Ho was working hard; had won tho confidence of his employers ; was re ceiving a fair salary and by frugal liv ing was constantly saving money. Two years had passed since wo liail become fast friends, aud Bob was now the confidential clerk of his firm, and the prospect of his becoming a part liar was not far distant. There re mained nothing for him to do lint to bring his loved ones to California and there make them a home. This he determined to do, aud when his sister wrote him that his mother's health was failing aud that she had but a few years to live, he redoubled his exer tions, hoping that the pure air and sunny skies of California would win back the health of the invalid. Mis salary had becu increased mid ho was self sacrificing in his efforts to sar<>; but, notwithstanding these facts, mouths, perhaps a year, would have on pass before he could have his dear ones with him. But iu the meantime fickle fortune was preparing to do 111 a few days what the Hard work of years could not have accomplished. My friend and I both held stock in the "Tiloluutue Milling I' imo.tny, whose veins of ore ha I lon ( since played out an I be»n abandoned as wortlili-iN The sto.'k was not even north ttie paper on win di it wai printed, and tile world ha I forgotten tUst «uyb a coiapau) Us I ev«r esiste I But tho original jroprietor of tho com- ' puny was one of a class of men to whom many a wealthy man of to-day owes his sudden riso to riches and affluence. He had energy and perse verance and uubonnded faith in tho possibilities of his claim, and kept working away long after his follow stockholders, having wasted their money, ha l given up in disgust. At last the labor of years had been rewarded, and he had struck a vein of ore so rich in quality and capacity that the stock which had long been valueless leaped at once to par and began steadly climbing. The papers were filled with accouuts of the rich find, and the Stock Exchange was crowded witli eager, excited men, anxious to buy tho long-negleoted stocks. Daily wo eagerly scanned the reports aud noted the rapid rise of Tuolumne Mining Company's stock. At last when it paused and stood still at seventy five above par we sold and found ourselves each seventy-five thousand dollars richer than we had been one month before. Bob seemed but little elated by his sudden rise to wealth and only thought of the happi ness it would bring to those whom he loved. The modest little cottage which he had rented was given up and a handsome mansion purchased and fitted up with the utmost care. Then he wrote for his mother and sister to join him. A month later they came, and no happier group could have been found in all the West than the four who sat down together on the night of their arrival. Many years have flown since the "Tuolumne Mining Company" made its president aud stockholders rich in a single day. Loving care and most skillful medical aid could not win back the health of the good old moth er and she long siuce passed to her home above. Robert Harris is a man well known in tho business circles of Sacramento. His lmir is now gray, and pretty, bright-eyed children climb upon his knee and oall him "papa." The friendship began in Lone Horso Gulch so many years ago has not diminished, but has grown stronger with the flight of years ; for the lady who sits opposite to me while I write and whom I call wife, is "Monte Bob's" sister. Birds at the Pole. Til the countries bordering on the Polar seas, where the changing soasons bring alternately tho two extremes of dearth and plenty, birds are more numerous in the short summer than anywhere else all the world over, aud in winter absent altogether. All are emigrants t ere by force of circum stances. In lue ti.arLTie" the birds of temperate climates are affected by the seasonal changes, though in a less de gree, through the influence of cold and heat upon their food supplies rather than by effect of cold upon their well-protected bodies. A coat of mail is not to be compared to a coat of feathers for safety, so far as a bird's life is concerned. Layer upon layer of feathers can withstand any amount of water or any degree of cold; in proof of this see how the delicate tern, after wintering in com paratively mild weather, go back to tho ice floes of the Polar Sea and lay their eggs on the ice. For two or three weeks the tender breast of the sea swallow is pressed against a cold block of ice. Again, as auother ex ample of the influence of food rather than climate in governing bird action, take tho colony of beccattcos. The beccafico is a Mediterranean bird common oi» the southern shores of Spain and Italy, in the Grecian Islands, Sicily and Malta, and on the northern shores of Africa. Formerly it was quite unknown in tho British Isles, but some years ago a largo orchard of fig trees was plantod near Brighton, and tho boccaficos have dis covered the fact aud come over to share the spoil. Doubtless the nightingales told them the story of English figs and showed them the way ovor. Be this as it may, the little birds from the warm shores of the Mediterranean bid fair to become es j tablishod as naturalized British sub* jects. --Liitell's Living Age. (ioutsklns or Sealskins. It is said that sealskins are going out of fashion, and perhaps the United States are going to a great deal of unnecessary trouble and expense in guarding the preserves of the sealskin monopoly in UeringSea. Certain it is that last winter a great many of the fashionables of Europe, who formerly never appeared out of doors in cool weather unless arrayed in sealskins, appeared in other furs, notably the skins of tho thihetan goat, which is a a very haudsoino fur. It is hinted that the parsimony of the Voi'th Amer ican Commercial Company is largely to blame for this fact. While the Alaska Commercial Company con trolled the output of Bering Sea, it was accustomed, it is said, to make its wares popular by makiug sure that the royalties of Europe, the opera queens and other people, who sot the fashions, had sealskin sacquea and overcoats of the finest skins aud latest cut, and all for nothing. The past year, under the present management, the free list was entirely suspended, and it is asserted that not a single complimentary jacket was received at tho Court of Hi. James. Ladies of fashion waited in vain for their cus tomary tip, and in revenge for the neglect proceeded to array themselves hi goal and other furs. It seems rath er hard to have to give expensive furs to the people who air best utile to pay for them. But it is the way, the world over. Those best aide to pay are tho one* that do not have to. —New Orlean> Pieayiiue. The milling region* of California •■over a bolt <>f eo iit try ah nit 'J2O mile* long by I row iwitj to 100 wide. Terms-- -SI.OO in Advance ; 81.25 after Three Months. THE PLAGUE OF LOCUSTS. INTERESTING FACTS ABOUT THIS PESTIFEROUS INSECT. How He Grows and Spreads Over the Country—lnsect Knemies of the Locust. IT is only within the last twenty years that the locust has attract ed much attention by its ravages. Locusts had several times been known to do damage to vegetation in Manitoba and Minnesota as early as 1819, when they are said to have been very numerous. Indians speak of hav ing seen them flying in great swarms in the air, but as there were no culti vated fields for them to destroy, they were thought nothing of. There is no account of their doing much damage before 1874. Whether swarms of th'Bse insects visited those districts as often prior to their settlement as they have since, it is not easy to ascertain. The breeding places the locusts in the West have been plains ele vated above the surrounding country, where the wind is brisk; they aro treeless and without rank vegetation. When the insects migrate from the West to the East, as they have been doing lately, they find no such plains, but they seem to have a faculty of adapting themselves to their sur roundings. Dampness spoils the eggs so they will not hatch. The general opinion is that as soon as these lands are settled and cultivated and trees planted, which will not be many years hence, the locust will be greatly di minished, if not driven entirely from our Western States. Eggs laid in June often hatch in July, but the time required varies greatly in different latitudes, at various altitudes, and at different times of the year. The young, after hatching, require from forty to sixty days in which to mature, varying, of course, according to the state of the weather, the abundance of food, and also their vigor. Soon after hatching the little fellows begin traveling in search of food, as they are generally hatched on grounds partially bare. In a very short time they moult or shed their skin, which operation is performed four more times in most cases before arriving at matu rity. The larva quits feeding and becomes dejected and drowsy, creeps to some sheltered nook and there lingers for a time, when the skin of its head and thorax crackß and it wriggles itself out, a soft and tender looking hopper. Soon, however, the tender limbs and body become dry and rigid, and the locust is again in trim for its raids. Its appetite Is iuisw very keen from its late fasting, and it devours everything in its way that is eatable. The principal change from the larval to the adult locust is the acquisition of wings. The wings are developed as folds of the integument and strength ened by hollow rods called "veins." There are in the veins of most in sects six main veins. These usually contain an air tube and a nerve. The arterial blood flows through them, so that the wings of insects act as lungs as well as organs of flight. As soon as the wings of the locust are fully de veloped it leaps into the air, unfolds its hitherto-untried members and takes n short flight. Each one does this for himself. Then soon, when there is a brisk breeze blowing, great numbers with one accord spring into the air and begin rising in a circling manner until they have attained a sufficient altitude, when they permit the wind to carry them along. They do not fly but float on the breeze, with their face to the wind. When hungry they come down and feed and then are off again. This con tinues until near the time for deposit ing their eggs. It is evident that the enormous powers of flight possessed by the locust, especially its faculty of sailing for many hours in the air, is due to the presence of a great number of air sacs. It will be seen that, once hav ing taken flight, the locust can buoy itself up in the air, constantly filling and refilling its internal balloons with out any muscular exertion, and thus be borne along by favorable winds to its destination. The number of enemies of this dreaded pest is "legion." Professor Sam Aughy says that during a period of twelve years, he dissected (330 birds of ninety different species, all show ing their great fondness for the locust as food. Not only wild birds, but all kinds of poultry eat them with avidity. Even squirrels, mice, chipmunks, weazles, skunks and larger animals devour them in groat numbers. All reptiles and fishes do a great deal to ward lessening the numbers of this as well as other injurious inserts. How ever great is tlio destruction of locusts by those animals which we cannot see, it is carried ou in a much larger scale by insect parasites which we do not notice. These are very numerous in species and individuals. Some of them confine their attacks exclusively to the oggs ; others to the young ; and still others only destroy the mature locust. The locust also lets internal para sites, which do much toward dimin ishing this dreaded pest. lu view of all the enemies, includ ing man, this poor insect has, it is truly surprising that a single one at tains maturity. N«w York Suu. The Custom Mouse receipts in Guat emala am muted during the year 1803 to (1,3 )l ,Ml H. The tax ou the expor tation of coffee produced #1,198,807, which gives a total for all resources from the Custom Mou»e, export* and imports iuoluded, «>t nearly #5,600,- 000. There are nine Yale men tn the Mouse of K*preseuiativea aud four m |lt'> I'nited hiatea Senate. g NO. 42. THE FELLOW'S MOTHER. If he knows it all, as some chaps do, And thinks he's smart, and says so, too, Who holds the same erroneous view? The fellow's mother. If he's narrow-chested, weak at knees. And soft of muscle, tell us please, Who thinks he's a modern Hercules? The fellow's mother. If, In the eyes of woman dear, He fondly thinks he has no peer, Who entertains the same idea? The fellow's mother. If the lifohe leads is fast and gay, And if weak his morals, tell us, pray, Who's last to think he's not OK/ The fellow's mother. If, perchance, a time comes when He's sick and friendless, tell us men, Who hurries to his bedside then.' The fellow's mother. If, later on} he should be found Watering with tears a grassy mound. Who'll slumber there in the quiet ground? The tellow's mother. —Joseph Banister, in Raymond's Monthly. HUMOR OF THE DAY. A lean dog generally growls the most.—Ram's Horn. Those who serve friends never lack employment.—Judge. Beats the world—'The impecunious tramp.—Texas Sifting*. When a man hears of distress, he longs to give advice.—Atchison Globe. A Boston woman speaks of a dirt wagon as a "real estate conveyance." —Statesman. It is strange, but true, that cold cash always burns in the spendthrift's pockets. —Truth. Mamma—"Mamie, don't!" Mamie —"Oh, please don't make me don't, mamma!"— Judge. The less people know about each other, the politer they are to each other.—Atchison Globe. Missed his calling—The fellow who was forgotten by the hotel clerk. Dansville (N. Y.) Breeze. The fool has one great advantage. He never lets his better judgment get away with him.—Galveston News. I always know when comp'ny's here, I can tell it any day ; For papa then calls mamma "dear,'' And never calls her "say." —Detroit Tribune. "Yes," remarked the egg; "my the. atrical venture was a success. I was cast for the villain and made a great hit."—Truth. Farmer—"Now, what do you s'posa that man's a yellin' at?" Son —"Ha appears, father, to be yellin' at the top of his voice. " —Judge. As a supreme test of the bullet-proof oloth it is suggested that it be made into seats ami knees of trousers for small boys.—Kansas City Journal. Little Girl (to her mamma) "What is a dead letter, please?" Mamma— "One that has been given to your father to post."—Jewish Messenger. Though ambuscades have passed away Along with things of bygone date, It is a fact that e'en to-day The Ushennan dot i lie in weight. —Buffalo Courier. As soon as a man makes a little money it is discovered that his wife is qualified by birth aud education to shine in the oest society. —Atchison Globe. There is nothing that gives one such an idea of the importance of an old saw as the fact that it sometimes per versely works just the other way.— Truth. He—"Well, for my part Ilike a pic ture that tells a story." She—"Mrs. Witherby's portrait ought to suit you, then. It makes her positively hand some."—Harlem Life. Fond youth, though summer bids you shirk, For picnics ne'er forsake your work, Close to your office duties cling— Don't undertake to push a swing. —Washington Star. English Visitor—'"What are the dis eases peculiar to yer H'merican youth?" Yankee—"Croup, measles, ohicken-pox, huppiu cough an' love." Cleveland Plain Dealer. If people would exercise the same ingenuity in paying a debt that they do in contracting one, interest rates would be lower than they are now. American Investments. There is no pen powerful enough to deaoribo the feelings of a man ou the oeoasion when for the first time ho goes out walking with his first wife, wearing his first plug hat.—Truth. Mrs. Newly wed—"And do you al ways trust your husband implicitly?" Mrs. Experience (enthusiastically) —"lndeed I do —that is to say, o) course, to a certain extent."—Homt Journal. "I don't mind a woman bein'noat,'' said old Mrs. Jason, "but one woman I used to know was jist a little too neat for any use. Why, that there wornau used to take a couple of gold fish she had out of their tank every Saturday night and give 'em a bath. —lndianapolis Journal. Some day a great genius will develop. He will invent a double-barreled alarm elook that will go off a second time after any desired interval. After the first rude half a>v,»keniug a man cau enjoy the best part of any uight's sleep that of not hiving to get up right away —in the s< retie half-oonsciou« confidence of having a sure thing ot not oversleeping himself.— Pnok. ••('•rat in the Jeweler*' l.aaguage. Twenty-fourorat gold la all gold, twenty-two carat gold has twenty two I part* gold, ou- ol silver and uu« of i cupper; eight« i earat gold Sax eight eeu p«rta of pure gold and tbrea parts ,a <h of silver an i copper in its "oin , poslttou i twelve ear.it gold is half gold, the rnuam tei be.ii> uiade up •»( l)| parts of aiht-r aud M| parts of copper j —MI Louis ltepubllo
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers