Newspaper Page Text
BY JAS. CLARK.
• Auditor's Notice.
Tsai* of GEORGE BUCHANAN. Deed.
riIRE undersigned Auditor, appointed to dia
-1 tribute the balance in the hands of William
Buchanan, surviving acting Administrator of
GEORGE BUCHANAN, late of Hopewell
township, dec'd.,among the heirs of said de
ceased, will attend, for that purpose, at his office
in the Borough of Huntingdon, on Tuesday, the
31st day of December inst. at 10 o'clock, A. x.
JACOB MILLER, Auditor.
Dec. 3, 1850.—.1t.
rstate of ALEXANDER RAMSEY, Deed.
HE undersigned Auditor, appointed by the
Orphans' Court of the county of Hunting
don, to ascertain and report liens, &c., against
the real estate of ALEXANDER RAMSEY,
late of Springfield township, dee'd., - hereby
gives notice to all persons interested, that he
will attend to the duties of the said appointment
on Friday, the 27th day of December, A. D.
1850, at-10 o'clock, A. M. at his office, in the
Borough of Huntingdon, when and where all
persons interested may attend.
JOHN REED, Auditor.
. Dec., 3, 1850.-It.
ROARDINti SCHOOL FOR YOUNG MEN.
SHADE GAT, fIUNTINGDON COUNTY,
Rey. Y. M'Ginnes, A. 111., and .1. H. W.
M'Ginnes, A. M., Principals. The Winter
Session will commence on the first Wednesday
of November, 1850, to continue five months.—
The course of instruction embraces all the
branches necessary to prepare young men either
for the higher classes in College, or for the stu
dies of a profession, and the active business of
life. The Academy building is new, commo
dious, and in every way adapted to the accom
mndation of a large number of boarders. The
location is distinguished for its healthfulness,
'and the moral and religious character of the sur
rounding community. It is easy of access, be
ing on the stage route connecting Chambersburg
with the Central Railroad, at Drake's Ferry.
TERMS ren SESSION.—For Orthography,
Reading and Writing, $5; Arithmetic, Geogra
phy, Grammar, Composition, Natural Philoso
phy, Astronomy, 'Physiology, Chemistry, &c.,
$8; Mathematics, Greek and Latin languages,
$l2; FrenCh and German, each $5. Boarding,
exclusive of fuel and light, $1,25 per week.
For reference, or further particulars, address
IA MES Y. WGINNES.
Shade Gap, Oct. 15, 1850.
"STAND FROM UNDER !"
FOR fear you will be crnshedby the avalanche
of ,Fall and Winter Goods which J.
& W. SAXTON have just received and opened
for public inspection and purchase, at their store
in Huntingdon, so celebrated for their cheapness
and variety. The crowds assembling at their
store daily, are only equalled by the numbers
nightly rushing for seats at a Jenny Lind
.roneertt We have better and cheaper
Goods than can be found at any other establish
ment in the country. 1.1 you don't believe this
assertion, "just drop in, you won't intrude,"
and verify it by examining qualities and prices.
To enumerate in detail all the articles we have
for sale. would occupy too much space in the
paper, to the exclusion of "marriages," always
so interesting to the fairer portion of our nu
merous customers. We will mention but a few.
We have For the ladies, (first in our es
teem, and 'first in the hearts of their country- ,
men,") Long Shawls, Thibet Shawls, Silks,
French Merino, Alpacas ' Bonnet Ribbon, Cash
mere de Lanes, Jenny Lind Cloth, Ladies' and
Children's Muffs, &c. tkc. with every desirable
article of'DRESS GOODS.
BY" The Ladies will not forget that their de- ,
partment is confined to the store on the corner,
opposite Costs' Hotel.
BOOTS AND- SHOES, HATS AND CAPS.
A splendid assortment of the aboVe article.
FRESH GROCERIES, of which we have the
very best, and will sell at a very small advance
on cost. Just call and examine for yourselves.
HARDWARE AND QUEENSWARE, and
a great many other articles too numerous to
mention, all of which will be sold low for cash
or country produce.
11:7" We will receive and store Grain, also,
and pay the highest market prices, and it is ad
mitted by all to be the most convenient place to
unload Grain in att, about town.
J. &. W. SAXTON.
Huntingdon, Oct. 29, 1850.
N. S. LAIVRENCE,
Agent for the sale of Southern Manufacturing
Company', Writing Paper.
WAZZHOOS6 No. 3, MINOR Sr. PHILADELPHIA,
200 CASES of the above superior Papsie
now in store, and for sale to the trade
at the lowest market prices, consisting in part
Fine thick Flat Caps, 12, 11, 15, and 18 lbs.,
blue and white.
Superfine Medium and Demi Writings, blue
Extra super and superfine Folio Posts, blue
and white, plain and rif.ed.
Superfine Commercial Posts, blue and white,
plain and ruled.
Extra super Linen Note Papers, plain and
Superfine and fine Bill Papers, long and broad.
Superfine and fine Counting-House Capa and
Poste, blue and white.
Extra super Congress Caps and Letters, plain
and ruled, blue and white.
Extra super Congress Caps and Letters, gilt.
Superfine Sermon Caps and Posts.
Superfine blue linen thin Letters.
Extra super Bath Posts, blue and white, plain
Embroidered Note Pr.pers and Envelopes.
Lawyer's" Brief Papers.
Superfine and fine Caps and Posts, ruled and
plain, blue and white, various qualities and pri
A leo, 1000 reams white and assorted Shoe
Papers, Bonnet Boards, white and assorte Tis
sue, Tea, Wrapping, Envelope, assorts - d
blue Mediums, Cap Wrappers, Hardw e •
VARIETY of articles too numerous to men
tion for sale at Cull...Ream': Green), and
confeetionasy “Head Quarters..
ITISTICE OF THE PEAC E.—Office in Main
' ,1 4. (f1,1400
'Aft 441 1 , 0 I
- I: Iflet
From the Rechmond Whig.
Perish the hand that would destroy
The temple of our sires !
Perish the heart that hopes for joy
In its consuming fires !
Let not the monster he forgot
Who dares to light the flame,
But curse him with a traitor's lot
And with a traitor's name !
Our fainting hopes refuse to die,
Our Aottering bulwarks stand,
And Freedom's banner still floats high
O'er a united Land !
The stars that gem its azure folds
May cease awhile to shine ;
But tremble not! The arm that holds
The flagstaff; is divine !
While the dark raven bodes despair
And still our fears renews,
The noble Eagle, high in air,
His onward way pursues.
He dreads not there the tempest's wrath,
Though all its thunders roll;
But soars above the tempest's path,
Exulting, to the goal.
BY FINLEY JOHNSON.
Ilow shall I act, 0 gracious God !
Toward my fellow man,
To fit me for a dwelling place
Within thy favored land
How shall I.calm my weary soul
When to despair 'tis driven,
"Forgive," a voice in sweetness said,
And thou shalt be forgiven.
Then should thy foes encompass thee,
And thy good name divide,
0, hearken to that angel voice,
Let kindness be thy guide;
And lot thy soul not from its rest
By these harsh acts be driven,
"Forgive, forgive !" the spirit cries,
As thou would'st be forgiven.
And though thou shouldst forgive thy foes
Seven times, with grievouS pain;
And though they should shy soul offend
Yea, seven times again;
Though thou at lust, through weariness, •
Be to resentment driven,
Remember thou must still forgive,
Or never be forgiven.
Let angry feelings disappear,
Like moon-light clouds away—
Like snow that falls where water glides—
Like dews of early day;
Let not thy love by angry foes
From its repose be driven,
But 0! "Forgive," and rest assured
'Thou, too, shalt be forgiven.
A New Way of Enlisting Recruits.
1 There is no class of people for whom the coun
trymen of the sonthern states have so great a dis
like, as those wearing fine clothes ; and there is no
surer way of becoming unpopular with them than
by going among them fashionably dressed. This
aversion extended as far back as the revolutionary
war, as the following incident will show:
During the revolutionary war, a Capt. E-, a
member of one of the first families of Charleston,
having lost in a skirmish most of his men, went to
the interior of South Carolina for the purpose of
.enlisting recruits. Having appointed a rendezvous
he spent a day or two in looking about the coun
try. At the time and place appointed, he found a
large number assembled, pot one of whom would
enlist. After several hours spent to no purpose,
lie appointed a rendezvous for the next day and left
the ground. Next day came, and with it the same
•tl, but he met with no more success than be
fore. What could he the matter? It was the first
time during the war that a recruting officer bad
been entirely unsuccessful. Something must be
wrong, and he determined to know what it was.—
Taking one of them aside, he asked :
",Why is it that Iget no recruits ?"
" You don't think," answered the countryman,
"that we are 'going to 'list under such a looking
man as you are 4 You are dressed too fine to be
much of a fighter."
In those days knee-breeches and silk stockings
were fashionable, and the captain was stressed in
that style. • There lay his unpopularity. Ile tat
tled to the countrymen and said—
"So you object to my dress, do you? Very well
come here to-morrow, and I shall have recruits."
Next day the same crowd had assembled, anx
ious to know what now idea the dandy captain had
got into his head. After the crowd had assembled
Capt. N. stepped out and said in a clear uud dis
" My friends, I understand that you object to
me because I am dressed a little finer than your
selves. You think lam unable to fight on that
account. Now I wish to make a proposition to
you. I will whip as many of you as will come out
one at a time, with the understanding that every
man is to enlist after he is whipped. Pick your
men and send them out."
After a dart consultation ; a huge, broad shoul
dered fellow - came out. The captain drew off his
coat very coolly. Fie was large and well made,
and a superior boxer.
The countryman rushed up, intending to brush
out the captain in a few minutes. Ile mistook his
man, however, and soon measured his length on
A greater bully than the first, stepped out to
take hie place, and EOM took his place on the
HUNTINGDON, PA., TUESDAY, DECEMBER 17, 1850.
ground. The countrymen stared. They had no
idea such a man could light. He had, however,
enlisted two men, and must not be allowed to go
any farther. The bully of the crowd now stepped
out to take the gentleman in hand. He was a stout
fellow, weighing about 280 pounds, and bragged
that he had never been whipped. He knew noth
ing, however, about boxing, and he very soon fol
lowed his companions. Never was a crowd so ut
terly confounded. Three of their best men whip
ped by a man from the city. They could hardly
realize it, and stood perfectly motionless.
" Well, my friend, are you satisfied l I have
enlisted three of your beat men—l suppose you
have no objection, now, to following their exam
" Not a bit of it," responded one of the crowd,
"you'll do to tie to, old fellow, Come, boys, fall
They did so, and in a short time the captain had
his company filled, and offers of more than he could
find room for.— Yankee Blade.
The Progress of the Age.
We cannot keep up with the progress of the age
—it shoots ahead of all calculation and anticipation
and we must make up our minds to allow nothing
to surprise or astonish ns. After beholding the
wonders of steam, and the electric telegraph, we
are ready to believe in anything. It is less than
seven years since our commerce in the Pacific
seemed to be limited to our whalers and a few tra
ding ships to Valparaiso and Callao. Panama was
only known as a neutral ground, where a Congress
of nations was to be hold. Vessels occasionally
reached California, and now and then a ship bound
to the mouth of the Columbia river, for a cargo of
furs, passed by the golden gates of San Francisco,
when even its handful of inhabitants had but a
vague idea that they were standing on mines of the
precious metals; yet in a short space of time what
wonderful changes have taken place h A war with
Mexico—the conquest and surrender of California
--the country erected into a State—millions and
millions of gold dug from the bowels of the earth
—a thousand ships lying in the bay of San Fran
cisco—a hundred thousand inhabitants in San
Francisco—an immense emigrolion pouring in
from all directions—mountains laid open—rivers
dammed—thousands digging for ore; and adven
tures who almost begged their way to California,
are now parading Broadway with bushy heads,
Spanish cloaks, diamond breast-pins, and a pocket
fun of "rocks." The sailing of a line of splendid
steamers from San Francisco to Panama, full of
happy, joyous passengers, and each having a mill
ion of gold on board, is now a weekly altkir, and
creates no particular sensation. "Away they go,"
says a contemporary, "like some conscious crea
ture of huge bulk and power, proud of its irresisti
ble force, glorying in the admiration it excites,
snorting, puffing and pawing up the clement through
which it drives, rushing onward, almost indepen
dent of man's superintendence, yct perfectly sub
mitting to his control, and yielding to and obeying
his will as tame as a galley slave." What won
derful things have been wrought through their
agency, as a medium of communication with dis
tant regions, within a year. Perhaps there is not
a family in the nation but has ofibred a prayer for
the safety of some of those great ploughing curs,
as they bore away from and to their native shores
some dear friend or relation. We now hear of
steam from California to China. That trade will
soon be opened. Doriblinglhe Cape of Good Hope
will be a rare occurrence. The Straits of Mag
ellan will be the highway to nations hereafter. If
we remain a united people, it is impossible to fix
limites to the greatness and importance of this
"I Am Never Alone:,
An old man sat in his easy chair. He was alone.
His eyes were so dim that he clipped read the
printed page—he had long ceased to hear any com
mon sound, and it was only in broken whispers
that ho could hold communion with those around,
and often hours passed by in which the silence of
his thought was not broken by an outward voice.
He had outlived his generation;—one by one the
companions of his boy-hood and youth had been
laid in the grave, until none remained of all those
he had once known and loved. To those to whom
the future is one bright path of hope, and happi
ness, and social love, how unevniable seemed his
condition—how cheerless his days !
I have said ho was alone. A gentle and
thoughtful child stole into his silent room, and
twined her arm lovingly around his neck. "I fear
ed you would bo lonely, dear grandfather," she
said, "and so I came to sit a while with you. Are
you not very lonely here, with no one to speak to,
or to love?" The old man paused for a moment
and laid Ids hand upon the head of the gentle child.
"I am never alone, my child," he said. "How
can I be lonely? for God is with me ; the Com
forter comes from the Father to dwell in my soul,
and my Saviour'is ever near to cheer and instruct
me. I nit at His feet anti learn of Him ; and
though pain and sickness often conies to warn me
that this earthly house of my tabernacle is soon to
be dissolved, I know that there is prepared for me
a mansion, the glories of which no tongue can tell,
no heart conceive. The love of God is like living
water to my soul. Seek in your youth this foun
tain, my child. Drink deep of its living waters,
and then when your hair shall be whitened for the
grave, when all sources of earthly enjoyment are
taken away, you too can say, I am never alone."
Let this testimony of an aged and devoted ser
vant of Christ sink deep into the heart of every
one who reads these lines. Seek while in youth
the source of that consolation which can be your
joy in sickness, in trial, and insolitude--your stay
wlien all earthly helps have failed. Then is ill it
be your blessed privilege to say, "I, too tun never
A Word to Parents.
BOYS IN THE STREET AFTER NIGHTFALL.—I
have long been an observer, as I am a sympathi
zing lover, of boys. I like to see them happy,
cheerful, gleesome. lam not willing that they
be cheated out of the rightful heritage of youth—
indeed, I can hardly understand how a high-toned
useful man, can be the ripened fruit of a boy who
has not enjoyed a fitir share of the glad privileges
duo a youth. But while I watch, with a very
jealous eye, all rights and customs which entrench
upon the proper rights of boys, lam equally ap
prehensive, lest parents, who are not forethought
ful, and who have not habituated themselvs to close
observation upon this subject, permit their sons
in indulgences which are almost certain to result
in their demoralization, if not in their total ruin;
and among the habits which I have observed as
tending most surly to min, I know of none snore
prominent than that of parents permitting their
sons to be in the street after nightfall. It is ruin
ous to their morals in almost all instances ; they
acquire, under cover of night, an unhealthful and
excited state of mind—bad and vulgar, immoral
and profane language, obscene practices, alumni
sentiments, a lawless and riotous bearing; inked
it is in the street after nightfall that boys princi
pally acquire the education of the bad, capacity
for becoming rowdy, dissolute criminal men.—
But few boys in any city or town or vi!lage, who
have this ill-advised and totally unnecessary in
dulgence, ever attain to the desired eminence of
useful citizens. Parents should in this particular
have a most rigid and inflexible rule, that will
never permit a son, under any circumstances what
ever, to go into the streets after nightfatll, wills a
view of engaging in out-of-door sports, or of meet
ing other boys for social or chance occupation.—
A rigid rule of this kind, Invariably adhered to will
soon deaden the desire for such dangerous practi
ces. Boys should be taught to have pleasures
around the family centre table, in reading in con
versation, and in quiet amusements. Boys, gcp
tlemen's sons, are seen in the streets after
nightfall, behaving in a manner entirely de
structive of good morals. Fathers and mothers
keep your boys home at night, and see that yon
take pains to make your homes pleasant,attractive
profitable to them; and above all, keep them from
,in street pastimes during the day or eve
ning hours of the Sabbath,.
The Marriage Alter.
Judge Charleton, in a recent clapcut address
before the Young Men's Literary Association, at
Augusta, Ga., thus sketches a marriage scene.
" I have drawn for you many pictures of death,
let me sketch for you now a brief; but bright scene
of beautiful life. It is the marriage inter, a lovely
female clothed in all the freshness of youtli and
surpassing beauty, leans upon the arm of him to
whom she has just pledged her faith, to whom she
has given herself, forever. Look in her eyes, ye
gloomy Philosophers, and tell me, ifyou dare, that
there is no happiness on earth. See the trusting
the heroic devotion, which compelsher to leave
country and parents for a comparative stranger.—
She has lunched her frail bark on a wide and stor
my sea; she has Banded over her happiness in this
world to another's keeping; but she has done it
fearlessly, for love whispers to her. that her chosen
guardian and protector has a noble and manly
heart. Oh ! woe to hint that deceivs her I Oh !
woe to him that 'forgets his oath and his manhood.
"We have all read the story of the husband who,
in a moment of hasty wrath, said to her who had
but a fine moments before united her fate to his—
"'lf you are not satisfied with my conduct, go,
return to your friends and to your happiness.'
"And will you give nie back that which I,
brought to you 7' asked the weeping Wife.
" he replied, your wealth shall go with
you, I covet it not.'
" 'Alas !' she answered, I thought not of my
wealth—l spoke of melded affections—ofiny buoy
ant hope—of my departed lore—eau you give me
back these ?'
" 'No ! said the man, throwing himself at her
feet. 'No ! I cannot restore these; but I can do
more—l will keep them unsullied and unstained.
I will cherish them through my life and in my
death ; never again will I fbrget that I have sworn
to protect and cheer her who gave up to toe all
that she held most dear.'
"Did I not tell soh there WaS poetry in woman's
word. See it here, the mild gentle reproof of love
winning back, from its harshness and rudeness, the
stern unyielding temper of an angry man. Alt, if
creation's fitirer sex only knew their strongest
weapons, how many of wedlock's fierce battles
would be unfought—how much of unhappiness and
coolness would be avoided."
Never Give a Hick for a Hit.
I learned a good lesson when 1 was a little girl,
said a lady. ene frosty morning I was looking
out of the window into soy fathers's barn-yard,
where stood many cows, oxen and horses, waiting
to drink. It was a cold morning. The cattle all
stood very still and meek, till one of the cows at
tempted to turn. In making the attempt,she hap
pened to hit her next neighbor; whereupon, the
neighbor kicked and hit another. In five minutes
the whole herd were kicking each other with fury.
My mother laughed and said, "See what cornea of
kicking when you aro hit. Just so I have seen
one cross word set a whole family by the (awesome
frosty morning." Afterwards, if my brothers or
myself were a little irritable, she would say, "Take
cane my children: remember bow the tight in the
yard began. Never give back a kick for a hit, and
you will save yourself and others a great deal of
cir The N. 0. Pi.•ayune says thnt the accounts
of damages to the Sugar crops, by frost, are corn
in daily worse and worse. It is feared that half
the crop will he spni': l'eforc taken in.
Remembrance of past Benefits.
I once called upon a neighbor says Humphrey,
who was watering an old stump of a geranium,
which seemed to me to give very little promise of
green'Teaf or flower. 'Neighbor,' said I, 'your la
bor will be lost.'
'Perhaps so,' said she, 'but I can hardly part
with my old tree for all that. I cannot help call
ing to mind what it has been, and how often it Las
made my window look cheerful with its fresh,
green leaves, and its fine scarlet flowers.'
This reply completely silenced me, for I thought
in my heart that my neighbor was right end I was
wrong. It is a good sign to remember past advan
I called on a friend who was giving a mouthful
of oats in a sieve to an old• horse gazing in his pad
'You may corn your horse,' said I, 'as much as
you will, but it is not at all likely that hp will over
be able to work again.'
'True,' replied he, 'but I have no wish to forget
the work he has done for me.—Many a weary day
he has been my companion, carrying me safely on
his back, or drawing me in my gig; and while old
Dinger lives I hope never to grudge him a mouth
ful of grass or corn.'
'Right,' thought I, 'and the feeling is a credita
ble one, but it is not always, nor often that a poor
brute falls into such bands. I shall think the bet
ter of you for your humanity.'
I called on a relative who was waited on by a
very old servant, who made sad blunders : indeed
the old man was almost blind, and'very feeble.—
`Old Peter's day is over,' said I ; 'sad blunders he
makes, and sad blimders he will wake, fur his day
is gone by.'
know it,' replied my rotative ; but if his day IA
gone by, mine is not, and while I live Peter shall
have a home under the roof of the muster he has
faithfully served. Ile has been a good servant to
me and to my father before sic, and eglit little
do I expect from him in the way of service. Pe
ter I say, served me, and it is n 37 Wm to sprve
I honored my kind-hearteil relative for his re
membrance of services, and for his attention to an
old servant. So that to speak the truth I got good
from my neighbor, my friend, and my relative.
Aspect of Death in Childhood.
Few things appear so very beautiful as a very
young child in its shroud. The little innocent face
looks so sublimely simple and confiding amongst
the cold terrors of death—erimeless, and fearless,
that little mortal has passed alone under the shad
ow, and explored the mystery of dissolution.—
There is death in its sublimest and purest image
—no hatred, no hypocrisy, no suspicion, no care
for the morrow even darkened that little face;
death has come lovingly upon it; there is nothing
cruel in victory. The yearnings of love, indeed,
cannot he stifled, for the prattle, and smiles, and
the little world of theughts that were ro deligl.rul,
are gone forever. Awe, too, will overcast us in
its presence, for we are looking on death; but we
do not fear for the lonely voyager—for the child
has gone, simply and trusting, into the presence of
its Whist, Father, and of such, we know, is the
Kingdom of Heaven.
RARE rItEAK.--AbOUt five weeks ago, a strange
little bird was observed to have taken up its quar
ters among a brood of chickens belonging to our
informant. He says the bird continues in the
Hock, up to this time, nightly retires under the
hen's wings, and otherwise deports itself as a bone
fide chicken. When it first came, it was about the
size of the chicks, but they have far oat-grown the
stranger which remains in state quo. 11Ir. 11. R.
l'ennvbacker is the gentleman who furnishes evi
dence of this rare freak. He says ho never saw
any other bird like the one above mentioned.—
Where did it come from 7—[Parkersburg Gazette.
Cr A western editor announces the death of a
lady of his acquaintance, and touchingly adds, 'All
her trials and these were neither few nor many,
were borne with patience and fortitude. In her
decease, the sick have lost an invaluable friend.—
Long will she seem to stand at their bed-side, as
she was wont, with the balm of consolation iu one
hand, and a cup of rhubarb in the other.
tom} A negro servant having one day received
a reprimand from his mistress for sonic trifling of
fence, was so much irtritatcd, that she went direct
ly out, kneeled down, and made the following pray
er: "Oh ! brood masa Lord ! come take me rite
out of die world dis Larry nalittute—if you no conic
yourself, send de dibble or any body else!"
ALL TILE SAME TIMIO.-When Dr. Johnson
courted Mrs. Porter, whom he afterwards married,
he told her that ho was of mean extraction, had no
money, and that he had an uncle hanged. The
lady, by way of reducing herself to an equality with
the doctor, replied that she had no more money
than himself; and that, though she had not a rel
ative hanged, she had fifty who deserved hanging !
ENOUDII SAID. -It is exceedingly gratifying,
when you ask a civil question, to receive a decis
ive, no-mistake answer. It saves a world of troub
le, to be told exactly what the interrogated party
thinks, without quibbbling or evasion. Here is a
specimen of what we call a satisfactory answer :
"A lady asked her physician whether snuff was in
jurious to the brains. "No," said he, "fur nobody
who lass any brains ever takes snuff.' "
"Er Gilber Stuart the celebrated portrait pain
ter once mot a holy in the street, in Boston, who
saluted him with—
" Ah, gr. Stuart, I have just seem your mina
tnro, and kissed it, bee use it was so much like
"And did it kiss you in return ?"
" by no."
" Then," said Stuart, “it was not like Me."
VOL. XV.---NO. 49.
An Editor's Dream on a iiiice of
It is a good old custom always to furnish your
friends a slice of wedding cake to dream on, as well
as plenty to eat. If you simply pat it uodcr your
pillow after eating moderately ut supper, yap will
likely dream pleasant dreams; but if you eat too
much before lying down, then lookout for trouble.
Our brother of the Evansville, Indiana, Journal,
lately suffered in this _way, and hero is his sad ex
perience. Ile warned, ye caters of too much wed
" With the wedding notice in another column,
we received from the fair hands of the Bride a
piece of the elegant wedding cake to dream on.—
Well we put it under our pillow, shut our eye.
sweetly us an infant, and blessed with an easy con
science soon snored most prodigiously. The spirit
of dreams gently touched us, and lo ! in fancy, we
were married! Yes, at one side stood a fair being
the bride au week, who looked more tit for heav
en than earth, and as the sequel proved, we were
afterwards sorry she did pot belong above and had
stayed there altogether. Time flew by like a dream.
For nearly three weeks, the god of love seemed to
have taken the happy couple to himself. It was
"my love," "my dove," "dearest," "sweetest"—
ringing in our ears every moment we could be
egught from business, which was all the time, so
much did we like this novel language and the fond
caresses. Oh that the dream had been broken off
here, and we had been left to anticipate such joys
without an alloy as a part to be of our future his
tory ! But uo ! some evil genius placed it in the
lietul of our duck is have pudding for dinner just
to please her lord, Ina hungry dream we sat down
to dinner, promising ourself a desert of kisses es
wall us belng promised a desert ofpudding. Well
the pudding moment arrived, and a huge slice al
most obscured from sight the plate before us.
" Diy dear," said we fondly, "did you make this ?"
" Yes, love ; ain't it nice 1" •
" Glorious; the beet bread pudding I ever test
" It's plum pudding, ducky," suggested my Pill ,
" Oh no, dearest, it's bread pudding; I always
was fond of em."
4 . Call that bread pudding!" exclaimed my wife
while her pretty lip slightly curled with contempt.
" Certainly, my dear, I reckon I've had to eat
enough at the Sherwood Rouse, to know bread
pudding, love by all means."
‘' Husband, this is really too bad. Plum pad.
dice is twice as herd to make as bread pudding,
and is more expensive and a great deal better. I
any this is plum pudding, sir," and ray wite's pret
ty Wow flushed with excitement.
" My dear, my love, my sweety," exclaimed I,
soothingly, "do not get angry; sure it's very
good Wit is bread padding."
'You mean, low wretch,' replied my wife in a
high tone, 'you know it is pltun pudding.'
'Ma'am, it is so meanly pnt tot etherand so bad
' ly burned, that the old boy himself would not know
it. I will not be contradicted in mn• own house, it
is bread pudding and the meanest kind at that.'
'lt is plum pudding!' shrieked my wife, as she
hurled a glass of claret in my Ewe, the glass itself
tapping the claret front my nose.
'Bread pudding !' gasped I, pluck to tho last,
and grasping a roast chicken by the left leg
`Burn pudding ! rose above the din, as I had a
distinct perception of feeling two plates smash
across my head.
'Bread pudding!' we groaned' n a rage, as thu
chicken left our hand, and flying with swift wing
across the table, landed in Madam's bosotn.
`Plum pudding!' resounded the war cry from
the enemy, as the gravy dish took us where we
had been depositing the first part of our diuucr,
and a plate of beets logded upon our white vest.
Bread pudding, forever!' shouted we in defi
ance, dodging the soup 4imeon, and in our agility
upsetting the table and Wing beneath its contents.
'Plum pudding !' yelled our amiable spouse, as
noticing our misfortune, she detemined to keep us
down by piling upon our head the dishes with nu
gentle hand. Then in rapid succession followed
the war cries. 'Plum pudding!' shrieked she with
every dish, as if to give it emphasis and force.
'Bread pudding; in smothered tones came up
from the huge Idle in reply. Thou it was. 'plum
pudding' in rapid succession, the last cry growing
feebler, till just as I can distinctly recollect, it had
grown to a whisper; 'plain pudding' resounded
like thunder, followed by a tremendous crash, an
my with leaped upon the pile with delicate feet and
emninenced jumping up sad down—whim, thank
heaven, I awoke, and thus saved my life.
We shall never dream on wedding cake again—
that's the moral—Peterseurg
'Old Squire was elected Judge ofthe
Inferior Court of some county in Georgia. When
he went home, his delighted wife exclaimed, 'Now
my dear, you are Judge--what am IT 'The sum*
darned old fool you Idlers *as,' was the tart reply.
er "Father did yon ever have another wife be
sides mother?" "No, my boy ; what possessed you
to ask such a question." "Because I saw in the
old family bible where you married Anna Dotniny
in 1835, and that isn't Mother, for her name wns
or The man who cheats the printer left tons
last week, in company with the woman whO flogs
her husband—they were joined a short distance
from town by the man who stole a stick of Nun
rice from a sick negro baby. Three noble travel
CZ.A man out Wort athertiges his truant wife :
"On the sth of July, on the night of a Modiay,
eloped fitom her husband, the vire of Jan Grut -
dy. His grief tin' her absence each day growing
deeper, shoal, any mon find her, ha begs liitn t.,
-- keep RT."