7 - I I 11 THE BLESSINGS OF GOVERNMENT, LIKE THE DEWS OF HEAVEN, SHOULD BE DISTBIBTJTED ALIKE UPON THE HIGH AND THE LOW, THE BICH AND THE POOR.' W SERIES. EBENSBCRG, PA., WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 21,1859. VOL. 6 NO. -44. l , K i - ill! For. 'CI. A: sorl . a-.i tin Jac tllOTl t ail 'asel who! one I rovil out this rrn.l :ehs, ECS, A. n'eu- Dts-I rhol, Y Oil prt 8, to I 1 thl tim rden n, V frer eroa ire t' to d. bodr it the in tie1 1 tioiw.1 is ob-l nse a I 11 tt! iordcrl 1 live p the ft tiii be no I crt A Bu ed by dni ition. of it, arilli, l mi- quart Mi rsap- bate itmcnt icts of til the .eeornt Still intend ,e the i tests astili ntend onJ on O. or al, cure of it, tun ,nt tb' en t nt tm retbtt he be i on 1 tod Is, iseaW rt , od. ; sen"1 re 5es of State t tbr aiit th led i"1 cbtbeT L be m with .fit booli and J Y E u Jrl s : DEMOCRAT & SENTINEL' IS PUB lishe.l every Wednesday Morning at s Dollar asd Fifty Cents per annum, ib'e ia a h.inee; Ose Dollar and Seventy eCssh it' n t paid within six months, and jD-il-ars if not paid until the termination 'he vear. .N"o subscription will be taken for a shorter u than six months, and no subscriber will be I'xrtv t'i discontinue his paper until all ar u'.d arc pai l, except at the option of the jr. .;ivpcra3a subscribing for six months will be o'K dollar, unless the money is paid Advertising Rates. One inseri'n. Tico do. Tliree do $ GO $ 75 41 00 1 00 1 GO months. $1 &0 2 50 4 00 6 00 10 00 15 00 tlx -1", 12 lines f f24'.inc.J f 3C lines I ; r less, f I rt 1 . I ;..1R', i- miesi 1 00 2 00 B do. $3 00 3 UO 3 00 12 do 45 00 9" 00 12 00 14 00 20 00 35 00 All a'Wrtisemciits must he marked with 'inil'Cr of insertions desired, or thoy will be nc until forl-id. and charged accordingly. ares, 24 lines arcs. 30 lines a column, co.iinin. 4 7 9 12 22 50 00 00 00 00 mw GOODS. CXDEHSIGNED has just received and is n.iw op-mug, a full supply of Goods suit er t'.c scisvii, consisting of pIADE TJ? CLOTHING, SOTS. ZZQZZ, EATS. AKD CAPS, RinV.LRE, Cl'TLERY, GliOCJL:- 'iii 1: ul l e sold Wholesale or Retail at VERY I.O'.Vl'ST Market prices for Cash or ry i i ' ;uee. 1S50. tf. K. HUGHES. a mil rqab is mm .s:i' srr-ber ha.-? just received at his New -l.or East nf Tlicinpsons Mountain House ,-Uof ALL JCIXDS of 'iHi AND SUMMER HATS, . U i.f.cvs vi rv low f.r CASH. CLINTON 11. JONES. X .-:i. l::.-lS.-p.-21-3ni. HEW ARRIVAL. r.i)::i:SRJXEl), has added to his S; -:k -( j;,i.ts :-.!d Slug's Src. A very nl well ftod assortment of MENS JV i:! i. .MlLilTS, MENS MAUSEILLES i :i C-.H.vr.-., do do do !.lr'-::.s ilo do do -'i'ViS ;ih l Ladies Mitts, and Gents, do. v: 1 B iys Suspenders. ISlack Neck Ties, ': 'l'i-s, Iidies and i.'nt. Linen Iland i ;, V,'int .in 1 Cdori-d Liten Fl"ss. : :i .ry, Carpet S.u lcs, Trunks ami every ii i. -OS iry kept in liis line. '' Uiu ;v i-;i!l .iihl '.i!;ii!i fi ir vnnrsplv?4- .US (MS! I. CLIN TON 31. JONES. I'fisnttUfiSMra! ;T OPENED AND FOU SALE DY li. S. I'NN, M. !., A yenend assortment of pSUGS, IIEDICINES, spices, uiiSjraiats, Dye-Stufis, IIS, WISES. BUS, FLUID. tOitkry, li.vzors, Brushes, Combs, Station Uu'i U.j-ik., l'erfumery, SoapB, Tobacco, -. i.a::,and other articles usually kept in li. S. CUNN, M. D. -.rq, May, 4, 1859.-24-ly. JACKSOV & ( f. llili, "ON' DENTISTS, JOHNSTOWN, PA. E 'f the firm will he in Ebcnsburg during ' :'.rt ten d.tys of each month, r"JFZ ''l i:h tiui'j ' all persons dei- ; fit the ctike of V. Lewis, nearly oppo- Ujta. rmav2.Vl 8.ri9tf. 1)VAI.'PAUL GIIA1T. "MAN UFA C- -r un.nVholesale Dealer in Boots, Shoes, Ihti and Caps, No. 68J North street, ktween Arch and Cherry, Thila- March G, 1$56.) JOII SH.ililJAl'GII, :,t of h Ptact, Summlttvllle, Pa. KrSlNESS INTRUSTED TO II IS ire will be promptly attended to. He will Auctioneer at Public Sales whenevtr m fiat capacity are required. RIbunn, h. d. DFS 1U.-S 1T.OFESSIONAL Services to ir2? e f 1:b(,nsLurS- Office in Drug - "i-h htrcet, opposite Thompson's llo- j.Miy, l,-1659.-24-ly. w T-.jt,..., . : - iiiul I Illr I ulnhlluliinont. NlP-Vrn Til?nnTvnntTr T Tr tL u? citizens of Ebeusburg and vi- openea a 't ailoring establish t'J Dr. Bunn's DruT Stnrp whom s-'vu 'ufacture garments of the i. I?0tit complete workmanship, aad't Vtrict attention to bxiss'mess, to ?,;'ve a i-hare of patronage. . ,8 --.. , 111U:.1A JJVIWK. ' 4 :tf TTTTR WAV -J flu v u r uii t.Lii A large t T -ortment of American Pock--V(iry knifo warranted,) by ' l' . 1&69. St. FIFTH ANNUAL OF THE CAMBRIA COU1VTY AGRICULTUR AL SOCIETY, "WILL BE HELD AT EBENSBURG, ON WEDNESDAY, THURSDAY and FBI DAY, the 5th, 6th and 7th of October 1859. President, James Myers; Vice Presidents, Ja cob Fronheiser, John Thompson Jr., Managers, Bees J, Lloyd, John Evans (Smith,) William Kaylor, M. M. Adams, John A. Blair; Treasurer A. C. Mullen; Secretary, Philip S. Noon. Committee of Arrangements . J. Alex. Moore, Frank Shoemaker, C. T. Roberts, Abel Lioyd, George Oatman. - X Committee of Reception. Robert A. M'Coy, John Scanlan, Edward Evans, John Boberts, Alexander Kinkead. goeral; regulations. The grand display of Horses, Cattle, Poultry, Agricultural and Horticultural Products, Manu factured Articles and Luxuries, will take place on the first and second days. The Plowing Match will take place op the third day, at 10 o'clock, a. m., and the Ladies Biding Match the same day at 2 o'clock p. m. and Auction of Articles, to be sold at 3 o'clock p. m. 4 Exhibitors, vill, in all cases, be required to become members of the Society, aud those who do not previously communicate with the Secreta ry, will be waited on by the Beception Commit tee at the Fair Grounds. Everything intended for Exhibition must be entered at the office, together with the name and residence of the owner, and will be marked and designated by a card numbered in the order of its entry. No vicious animal will be entered, unless the owner takes measures to prevent any possible damage otherwise resulting therefrom. Animals or articles on exhibition cannot be removed before the close of the Fair, without permission from the Managers. Premiums not demanded within six months af ter they are awarded, will be held as donations to the Society. Instructions to Judges. The Judges are required to report themselves at the Secretary's office, on th ground, on the first day, before 3 o'clock, p. m., at which time their names will be called, and vacancancies (if any) filled. They will report by the number on the article exhibited, and, in awarding Premiums, be gov erned by the printed lists furnished them by the Secretary. They shall require such evidence from exhibi tors, relative to the stock or articles on exhibi tion, as shall be to them entirely satisfactory. Any deception in the statements of exhibitors shall when discovered make a forfeiture of the premium, to which the party making it would otherwise be entitled. All the articles specified in class Nos. 10, 11 and 13 must have been manufactured in the County, in oid:r to entitle them to premiums. Also, all animals entitled to premiums, must be such as have been raised in the County, or own ed and kept therein for at least six months prior to the Fair. No article exhibited shall be entitled to two premiums, as for instance, the best bushel of grain receiving the premium, shall not be in cluded in the best acre on which a premium is nrfcred. The Judges of several classes will be required to report in writing the premiums awarded by them, respectively, with fuch remarks relative to the merits of the animals or articles coming un der their examination, as they may think pioper. Any person exhibiting an article not mentioned ia the printed list, but which may be deemed meritorious by the Judges, shall be awarded a Diploma. The Judges will not permit any one to inter fere with them during their adjudication, anil when any Judge is interested, he shall with draw, and the balance shall decide on the merits of the articles. The Judges cf the various clashes will meet on the ground, on the second day, at 10 o'clock, A. M., to enter upon the discharge of their re spective duties, and their reports muft be handed to the Secretary before 12 o'clock, M. on the last day of the exhibition. Fses ov Admission. Certificates of Member ship will issue at One Dollar, and will admit to the entire exhibition the member, his wife, and all their children under twenty-one years of ago. Tickets, good only fur a single admission, will issue at 25 cts. Children under twelve years old, half price. Tickets good for the entire exhibition will be issued to apprentice boys and servant girls, at 50 cts. Application to be made at the Business Office, oa the Ground. Cc5-Each certificate or ticket will bear the name of the holder, aud any transfer thereof will for feit to the Society. And the person transferring or receiving such a ticket, with intent to defraud the Society, shall not thereafter enter the tnclo suie upon any condition whatever. Special Announcement. -The Managers con fideutly assure the public that such improve ments will be made upon the arrangements of the four former Fairs, -as will much better secure the comfort of the animals, the safety of the articles, and the convenience of the exhibitors. The Ebcnsburg Brass Band has been engaged and will be upou the ground during the entire exhibition. In short nothing within the means of the Soci ety will he left undone, which might have a tendency to render the Fair useful and attractive, and bring to it a respectable attendance. fJCTA reward of Ten Dollars will be paid by the Society for the apprehension and conviction of any persons found injuring, destroying, or in any manner watonly interfering with any ani mal or article on exhibition. The annual address will be delivered by the Hon. GEOUE TA1LOK, at 'Z o'ciock in tho afternoon of the last day of the exhibition. LIST QF PREMIUMS. Class No. 1. Houses. Judges, William K. Tiper, Dr. II Yeag ley, William D. Pryco. Michael Driskel, William 31, Jones. Best stallion, 15 00 " gtl-iiug, 15 00 " mare, 15 00 colt, between 2 and 3 years, 3 00 .. . j o " 3 00 " " under 1 year, 1 00 " " pair match horses, 4 00 " " mulca, . 4 00 Class No. 2. Cattle. Judges. G. C. K. Zahm, Richard B. Davis 3 2 3 1 o 2 1 1 3 3 Evan Griffith, David M. Evans, Augustin Durbin. Best bull, yearling bull, '-' cow, 2nd best cow, Best steer between 2 and 3 years, " heifer " " steer between one and two years, " heifer " 44 cow or ox, . . 44 yoke of oxen, v-' Class No. 3 Sueep. Judges. William O'Keeffe, James M' Gough, Emanuel Young, Geo. Bruce, nenry Kager. Best buck, 41 ewe. 44 lot of sheep, 6 in nnmber, ' pair of lamba. Class No, 4. Swixe. Judges. A. M'Vieker, Joseph Buck, Fes tus Tibbot, Henry Hobble, Geo. Gallagher. 00 00 00 00 00 00 00 00 00 00 2 2 3 1 00 00 oo oo $2 o 4 o 00 00 00 00 Best boar, 44 Sow, " lot of pigs, 6 in number, 4- fitted hog, CLAS3 No. 5. POULTET. Judges. George J. llodgers, Gideon J. Marlett, Isaac Wike, John Flick, William Douglass. Best pair shanghai fowls, 44 4,chittagon5C 44 4 4 4 poland 44 4 4 44 cochin china 44 4 4 4' turkeys, 4 4 4 4 ducks, " 44 geese, Class No. C. Geaix. Judges Johnston Moore, John B 00 00 00 00 00 00 00 Miller Augustin llaut, Cornelius 1 Simon Owens, Dever, Sr, Best bushel of wheat, 44 44 corn, ears, 4 4 44 oats, " 4 4 4 4 rye, 4 4 44 barley, 4 4 44 timothy seed, 44 4 4 clover seed, 44 44 flax seed, 4 peck Chinese sugar cane seed. Class. No. 7. Vegetables. Judges. William Kittell, J. D. Hamil ton, Simon Weakland, Levi B. Cohick, Geo. N. Smith. 00 50 50 50 50 00 00 00 50 Best bushel of potatoes, 50 44 4 turnips, 50 ' ruta baga, 50 4' 44 bets, " 50 4 4 44 carrots, 50 4 4 4 4 onions, 50 44 dozen cabbage, 50 44 half bushel tomatoes, 50 44 half dozen squashes, 50 4 4 4 ' parsnips, 50 4 4 44 kohl rabbi. 50 44 pumpkiu, 50 44 citron, 50 4 musk inelloc, 50 44 water mellon, 50 44 seed, cucumber, ' 50 44 half bushel beans, , 50 44 lot celery, 50 4 4 lot cauliflower, 50 44 lot brocoli, 50 Class No. 8. Fecit. Judges. E. A Vickroy, Peter Kaylor, Thomas B. Moore, John II. Douglass, II. A M'Pike. variety of. fall apples, . ... fjl 00 dozen, 44 50 variety of winter apples, 1 00 dozen, 50 44 fall pears. 50 44 winter pears, 50 44 peaches, 50 44 plums, 50 44 quinces, 50 variety grapes, 50 Class No. 9. Products of the Daiey. Judges. John Griffitb, David O'Harra, John M. Bowman, W. II. Gardner. John B M yres. Best roll of butter, 1 00 44 print butter, 1 00 44 cheese, 1 00 Class No. 10. Aobiccltubal Imjpliments. Judges. Edward Glass, Michael Leavy, Thomas Callan, Emericus Bender, Jacob Kaylor Best plough, $1 00 44 harrow, 1 00 44 cultivator, 1 00 44 hillside, 1 00 44 wheat drill. , 1 00 44 corn planter. 1 00 44 horse rake, 1 00 44 reaper, 1 00 44 mower, 2 00 44 grain cradld, 1 00 44 wind mill, 2 00 44 cutting box, 2 00 44 threshing machine. 2 00 Class No. 11. Manceactueed Abticles. Judges. Erie Bickford, A. A. Barker, Henry Nutter, M. J. Smith, Francis Chris ty. Best two horse carriage, buggy, 44 set single harness, 44 saddle and bridle, pair boots. 44 shoes. calf skin, side sole leather, 2 1 00 00 50 50 50 00 50 00 50 00 . 44 cider mill and press, " 44 painting and grainiog, 44 axe, 44 pair drawing chains, 44 breast chains, 44 shuck, ; , ; 44 pair coal grates, , : " pannel door, " 44 sash, ' . ' barrel of flour,- Class No. 12. Plowing Match. . Judges Bees S. Lloyd, John Bradley, Enos C. M'Mallin, Christian Fulmer, John Smay. . ' . .. , -.? Best plowing.i .-v--r 3 00 44 44 by boy under 17, 3 00 Class No. 13. Domestic Manufactures. Judges. Mrs. John Thompson, Mrs. W. K. Carr, Mrs. Conrad Suppes, Mrs. Geo. N. Smith, Mrs J. J. Murphy. Best piece carpet, 2 00 2d best. 44 2 00 Best pair blanket?, 2 00 44 Coverlet, 1 00 44 pieced bed quilt, 1 00 44 4 4 cradle quilt, 50 44 tabic ppread, 1 00 44 piece tow cloth, 1 00 4 4 44 linen cloth, 1 00 44 4 4 linsey wolsey, 1 00 44 hearth rug, 50 44 pair hose, 50 4 4 4 gloves, 50 44 piece flannel, 2 00 44 corn brooms, 50 44 fly brush, . 50 44 hard soap, 50 44 soft soap, 50 44 candles, 50 Class No. 14. Cclinaey Depaetment. Judges. Mrs. R. P. Linton, Mrs W. If. Gardner. Mrs; J. M. Christy, Mrs, P. II. Shiels, Mrs." J. M. ltiffel. Best bread, 1 44 rusk, 44 pound cake, 44 jelly cake, 44 sponge cake, 44 domestic sugar, 1 44 apple butter, 1 44 pumpkin butter, 1 pear 44 upper, 4 lot cabinet ware, 44 variety tin ware, 44 variety stove Jc carthern ware, 44 washing machine, 4 meat vessel, - 44 churn. cook stove, ; 44 parlor stove, 44 pair horse shoes, 44 wagon, 2 00 1 00 1 00 1 00 1 00 1 00 1 00 1 00 1 00 2 00 1 00 1 00 1 00 1 00 50 1 00 1 00 50 2 00 44 plum 44 44 quince 44 44 tomato catsup, 44 walnut 44 44 tomato jelly, 44 apple 44 4 . peach .J4, jl ..... 44 plum 44 44 quince 44 4 currant 4- raspberry jam, 44 strawberry 44 44 blackberry 44 44 apple preserves, 44 pear 44 44 peach 44 44 plum 44 44 cherry 44 44 tomatoe 44 44 pear marmalade, 44 peach 44 44 quince, 44 44 catawba wine, 44 elderberry 44 44 blackberry 44 44 currant 44 00 50 50 50 50 00 00 00 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 00 50 00 50 50 50 50 00 50 44 vinegar, 44 jar of pickles, 44 jar of brandy peaches, 44 cherry bounce, " 44 dried apples, 44 44 peaches, 4 4 44 plums, 44 44 cherries, 44 honey in (comb.) Class No. 15. Needlewoek. Judges. Misses' Rose Rhey, Jennie Ivory, Emily Roberts. Lizzie Ramsey, and Ellen Pfoff. - Best ornamental needlework, 2nd best Best silk embroidery 44 linen 44 44 cotton 44 '' worsted 44 44 shell work, 44 dress making, 44 netting, Class No. 10 Flowers. Judges. Misses Sallie Collins, Angeline Fockler, J. A. Evans, Mary tf. Kittell, and Amelia Thompson. Best selection of flowers, 44 basket of flowers. 44 moss vase with flowers, 44 hand boquet, 2nd best Best flat 2d best 44 Best table boquet, 2d best Best collection. of artificial flowers. 2d best 44 44 Class No. 17. Fine Arts. Judges. William Tiley, Sr., Jeremiah M'Gonigle, Richard Proudfoot, Daniel Lit- zmger, J aeon iu. uampDeii. , Best oil painting, 2d best 44 Best water color painting, 2d best Best crayon sketch, 1 2d best 44 Best draughting, 44 penmanship, . - J 4 marble work, 1 Class No. 1S- Ecesteiasism. Cornelius Collins, James Swank, Dr. John Clark. Dr. George Lewis, George Frits: i . ; - j Best equestrienne over 18; Discretionary, 2d best " " . Best equestrienne under 18; Discretionary, 2d best 44 44 " August 24, 1859, 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 50 iiltBceUancDus. The school Master's lromfse. 4Boys," sad he, smilingly, one day. 4 'What's up, thought we, and were all at- i teuton. It was like a. sun-peep through a heavy storm-cloud when 4old Haskins' smiled on us, and the phenomenon was perfectly, un accountable. "Boys," said he, 4I am about to bargain with you for good behavour; (a chance of tac tics, verily;) I desire that you will conduct yourselves with decorum for one week, and I will promise to show you a curiosity what no man ever saw; and having shown it to you what no man will ever see aain.' "Yes, sir!" 'Agreed!' 4 1'yi, sir!' and various otner expressions of acquiescence came from every quarter of the room; and, as a preface to the new state of things, the school was dismissed at an early hour, leaving the boys to gaze into each other's intuition the answer to the riddle which had stolen unon them like a pleasant dream. An anxious week followed a wee of cu riosity, bewilderment hopo and pleasure in embryo. Out of school it was all the talk what no man ever saw, and what no man hall ever see again' not even the terrible author of tho compromise. What could it be? Another and another dav, until at length the identical named one dawned unon the gladdened young hearts. me o clock came every urchin was at his post books and 6lates, all in readiness for tho day's battle with the demon of darkness and ignorance every task fully committed to memory. Although a charming state of affairs? An active mind not wedded too cloosely to orthodox ideas, would have divin ed at once the great advantage of rewards and kindness over oppression and cruelty. But our old tutor was invincible. Unmake him? Never. You could not alter his plans an iota. "Tingle! tingle!" sounded tho little bell that bell had a voice as well as a tongue. Boys all attention! eyes, ears, mouths agape! momentous epoch! Old Ilaskms raised the lid of his desk, and drew the wonderful thing forth adjusted his ominous-looking spectacles astride bis nassal projection, and proceeded to the solemn cere mony "Attention, school!" roared the tutor. A single order was sufficient you might have heard a pin drop. The hour has at length arrived; behold in my upraised fiugers a single almond" (ter rible suspense.) "In this almond is a kernel (ceremoniously breaks the shell and exposes the tiny thing") "This no man ever saw!" Then opening his capacious jaws, exposing an internal array ot uccaying ivory ana raw flesh, that remainded us of the mouth of a Bengal tiger, he thurst in the mysterious ker nel, ciushed and swallowed it! 4 'Boys," exclaimed he, with an emphasis. "boys, you will never I will never no man will ever see that kcrnal again! To your les sons, you rascals, every one of you! ICT"; Madrid, the capital of ppain, is the highest of tho European capitals; 200,000 people dwell at the elevation of 2,200 feet, on a naked desert plain chilled by a biting breeze nfne months of the year, and baked the remaining three The highest perma nent residence in Europe is in the pa?s of Santa Maria 9,272 feet In the Andes of South America, man dwell more aloft than in Europe. Potosi, the highest city on tho globe, is 13.350 feet above the sea: and a post-house at Rumihunas is 15,940 feet, which is but a trifle below the peak of Mount Blanc, where mortal never stayed above two hours. IFibemianUTce. An Irish clergyman hav ing gone to visit the portraits of the Scottish Kmgs in Hollyrood house, observed one of the ruonarchs of a very youthful appearance, while his son was depicted with a long beard and wore the traits of extreme old age. "San ta Maria!" exclaimed tho crood Hibernian, "is it possible that this gentleman was an old man when his father was born!" jW Why do you always walk with a stick? said Smith to Robinson, on meeting bins in the streets; except the murm, I regaru those who use walking-sticks as idlers who have nothing to do-" "Quite the - reverse," replied Robinson, 4 'I look upon them as active and industrious persons, who always have something in hand? J63TDe Quincy being asked why there were more women than men, replied, "It is in conformity with the arrangements of na ture; we always see more of heaven than earth." CT" He who would abandon a project or be swayed from an honest purpose by the jeers and frowns of others, is not worthy of a position in the society of men. Mrs. Partington asks, very indignant ly, if the bills before Parliament are not coun terfeit, why should there be such a difficulty in passing them? GIT Love is neither crime nor folly. Ucre quitted love may be inexpedient, and she may be weak who indulges it, but there was nev er a heart in which true love had dwelt that was not purified and made noble by its influ ence. The sin and crime in the world, ordi narily ascribed to love, should be ascribed to the absence of it. one cross-eyed came your eyes jGT, 'I say, mister.' said individual to another, "how so crooxed: 4 -through sitting between two girls, and trying to make love to both at the same time,' replied the other. 23T 4Isay, Broom!" 'Call me by my whole name, if you please, sir." It has a handle to it, and it was meant to bo used, sir-" 'That's so. Well, Broom-handle, how are you?', $1 1 00 50 00 50 00 50 00 00 00 M. Very Dutch. Two old Dutch neighbors in Pennsylvania were proverbally steadv, aud honest, and they carried on their transactions with their neigh bors and each other for years, on the plan of ready pay in cash or barter But at last the hard times came and they were obliged to resort to keeping accounts. One dav they met for settlement, and af ter very hard labor and urging, it was appa rent that llanns owed lawKub twenty dol lars. "Well, Yawkub, how mucht we settle him now? I'se got no inonish." "Yaw, yaw; never mind dat, wo can settle him nut a notish; said xawkub, who prided himself on doing busiuess at the store. "Uh, yaw, mit a notisn; well, den, you writes do notish. "Dat lsu nit rigut. saia JcawKUD'you owes me de monibh; you writes de notish, I sign him, dat ish de vay." So llanns set about it and produced the following: Westmoreland kounty I owish Yawkub twenty dollars for settle up when I hash no monish to pay him. Signed, - Yawsub Then arose an unforseen difficulty, who ought to keep the note. It was finally decided that llanns ought to keep it, for how else would he kuow how much to pay Yawkub. In due time, when llanns the debtor got money, he paid up, and this raised another puzzling question, and ended in the conclu sion that Yawkub must take the note in his keeping, so that he would know that llanns had paid him the money, Lorenzo Doio on bad thoughts . Some body once said to Lorenzo Dow, who was a very eccentric strolling preacher: "Mr Dow, I dont know what to do. Bad thoughts troub le me very much. They come into my head and I don't know how to keep them out. how can I help doing wrong, if it is wrong to have bad thoughts?" Mr. 1. replied. " We cant stop birds from flying over our heads, but we can keep them from building nests in our hair. Do you ask: How can you drive away these bad thoughts, aud keep them from making cests in your mind? Why, just as we exclude thistles from the land, by putting in so much good seed that there is no room left them to grow. Keep the mind busy with something innocent and useful, and leave no place for the intruder." 'I will give you a good dressing,' said a fine gentleman, with threatening ges tures, to an humble laborer. 4I am much obliged to you, sir; but, as you are a gentle man, vou ouirht to be the better dressed of the two, and, if you please. I will undertake you shall be so" ITT'' Where shall I put this paper so as to be sure of seeing it to-morrow?' inquired Mary Jane of her brother Charles. 'On the lookiug glass," was his prompt reply. How to icin. You win n pealing to her impulses; you oppeahng to his interests- It is all the differ ence between a compliment and a bribe woman by ap win a man by 3TA. 4 "tough" subscriber to a country paper was struck from its subscription list be cause hewould n't pay up. The delinquent's wife insisted rathfully that she knew what was newspaper law that she did the pro prietor was obliged to send the paper until 4 'all arrearages were paid." JjX, The young lady who was suffering from the ear-ache, was completely cured by a young man whispering only a few words in it something about 44the Squire." Singu lar cure very. 4 4 Why. Tom, my dear boy, how old you look!" 'Daresay, Bob; for the fact is, I never was so old before in all my life." A wag tells us of a landlady who made her tea fo weak that it could n't get up the spout of the tea-pot TS?The entire cost of the Fifth Avenue Hotel, N Y., opened last week, was 1, 150,000, of which the furniture, carpets and painting cost $350,000. One hundred guests were registered the first day. An American Trotter AstoniJiing the British. The Northern Times of August 12. says: The hitherto unaccompliihod feat of trotting twenty miles within an hour (in Eng land) was performed yesterday by a horse called -Jack Roshite,' (an American) He was handled by a Yankee jockey, especially brought over for the occasion." IC7" A Republican paper says i . . r can party lies norta oi Jiason "the Repub and Dixon's line" To which a Democratic cotetnporary aptly and truthfully replies: The Republi can party lies wherever it exists and only by lying. The Postmaster General has decided that transient newspapers, which happen to be mailed without being prepaid, may be paid for on delivery, at the rate of postagj which ought to have been paid before they were mailed. Dr Hays, one of the companions of Dr Kane, will organize i-hortly another Artie expedition, under the auspices of the Scien tific Association. There are fourteen revolutionary sol diers now liviug in Massachusetts, whose uni ted ages amount to thirteen hundred and for ty nine years. ! h n. inr o D C G
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers