Married Ute.
There are eoiue mean men in this
world men who will, as Mrt. Raddle
6aid, "tamper with a woman' feelings
every hour of the Jay . Occasionally it
U the lot of a woman of gentle an J con
tiding nature to marry one of these
creatures, and such was the fate of
.Mrs. Undershirt. The other evening
her husband came home with a most
tuvsterlous and solemn look upon his
countenance. So marked was this that
his wile asked : ".My love, are you not
feeling well?' "Perfectly well, my
dear," he replied. Then he closed his
inouth and looked more mysterious
than ever. Women are not, as is well
known, naturally of a curious disposi
tion, but 6uch couduct was enough to
arouse anybody's interest. Mrs. Un
dershirt tried in every way she could
think of to draw her husband out, but
her efforts ouly resulted lugettin j her
acll into a high state of nervous anxiety.
Finally he yielded a little and said:
'My dear, if I were to tell you some
thing, could you keep it to yourself?"
Her cheeks glowed with excitement
as she cried : "Oh yes, Harry." He
continued very solemnly: "If I told
you about a scandal in this town could
you refrain from mentioning it !" Her
eyts shone like stars, and she fairly
danced up and down with excitement
as she replied : "Oh, indeed 1 could !"
"Even If it were a church scandal?"
"Yes, yes !" she exclaimed, breathing
short and eagerly. "How has the baby
been to-dav r" lie mildly asked. "Love
ly. Well?" "Did the man come with
the coal r" "Yes ! Xow, Harry t" and
she was as fidgetty as a monkey with
suppressed curiousity. "I supper
most read; r" he went on. "Yes. Oh,
for mercy's sake, tell me about the
scandal !" she cried. "Why, I don't
know of any." he replied. "Don't
know of any?" "No." An awful look
oi disappointment came over her face.
She at Led : "Then why did yon ask me
if 1 could keep a seciet?" "To find
out if you could," he answered. The
look of anxletv turned to hate. "You
are the meanest, horridest, most con
temptible, mean, ugly awful brute in
this world !" she cried, and then she
burst into tears. And Mr. Undershirt
got the worst of the joke, for the
next day Mrs. U. invited her mother
to cc me and stay with them lor six
weeks.
Joe JarTentM'a Home.
"Mr. Jeflersou's home at Hobokus Is
a fine, old. partly modernized farm
house, surrounded by hundreds of
acres, in a rolling country, where are
trout streams, forests, hills and level
fields. The rooms in the building are
large, many with low ceilings. Some
of the furniture and tapestries are from
Holland. A quaint old clock, with
chimes, stands in the wide hall wid
enough to make a room by Itself. On
the parlor walls are some netable oil
paintings. One of them, the Corot, I
have already mentioned. Inman's por
trait of Macready as "William Tell" is
another one of the best things that
Inman ever did. Two chaiuiing por
traits, by Xagle, of Mr. Jefferson's mo
ther and his grandfather stand in a
recess in the room; while near a front
.-window is a large GustaveDore, repre
senting a scene in 'Don Qjixote.' A
luminous picture of Corot's lovely face,
fcy Le Fasieur, is one of Mr. Jefferson's
most valued works of art. In from of
and behind the house are evergreens
planted by the owner's hands ; eff to the
right stretches an undulating plain end
ing in a forest; on the left is a quiet,
shaded. English lane, by the side of
which or rather, a score of feet below
it flows a stream dammed so as to
lake a fish-pond, and draining a
meadow where cows are pasturing.
Not far off are Mr. Jefferson's trout
preserves, where there can be had ex
cellent sport in fly-fUhing. The barn is
a farmer's barn, well stocked with hay
and sulks and farm implements. A
Scotch shepherll's dog, or playful,
affectionate disposition, and bright,
handsome face, is a chief pet of the
proprietor, who brought him from over
the seas. Rip loves Schneider. When
we took a drive through the neighbor
ing region, the coil, gray November
day wrapping the fields the trees and
the bill-tops in neutral tints, sugges
ted several scenes that Corst would
have liked to paint, and it was of Corot,
again, tbat the genial artist-host often
spoke. There,' he would exclaim,
pointing to one of the more character
istic natural effects, to which tue red
abawl and dull gown of a distant
country woman leut the quietly deco
rative charm that the French landscape-painter
so loved, there is a Corot,
isn't it? it was jut that."
Americas heat In KaMa.
Russian journalists appear to be just
now painfully exercised by the
announcement that two American
steamers, laden with gram, have enter
ed the port of Revel lor the purpose of
discharging their cargoes, a circum
stance hitherto without precedent in
the annals of Russian commerce. That
Russia would never need to import
cereals from foreign countries has
heretofore been a firmly established
article of popular faith throughout the
Cear's dominions. So rapid, however,
has of late years been the falling off in
productiveness exhibited in the agri
cultural districts of theempire that the
seemingly impossible has at leng.h
come to pass, and Northern Russia is
importing wheat from the United
States. It Is but justice to the Russian
press to acknowledge that it is has been
profuse of warnings with respect to the
I r jbable consequences of slovenly unin
telligent farming, peisUtecce in and
o.d-fatliior.eJ and exploded systems of
cultivation, reluctance to Invest capital
in modem agricultural improvement
absenteeism, aud other laches wLKh
have practically disqualified Russian
grain growers from competing for
foreign custom with their transatlantic
rivals. But Russian buyers and peasant
farmers alike were so immutably pos
sessed by the conviction that Russia
was the pedestined granary of Europe
tbat they calmly ignored these salutary
monitions. They are now stricken with
amazement and consternation by proof
positive, such as is afforded by the im
portation of American grain Into Revel,
that the cereal yields of Xothern and
Central Russia no longer suffice to meet
the consumptive requirements cf the
native population. Germany, too is
. giving to America the preference over
Russia for what grain she finds it
necessary to import from abroad, on
the reasonable grounds that the. Ameri
can wheat Is at once cheaper and of
better quality than the Russian. On the
whole, Russian agriculture is just now
at aa extremely low ebb, and its future
promises to prove even gloomier than
its present.
At the root of Shoahoae Fall.
So sound is audible above the thun
der and roar aud din of the waterfall,
and the doctor, realizing from bis pro
fessional experience that it is uo place
for rneumatic person's to linger,
gently pulls my arm, and we move off
in silence further down the stream, and
out of reach of the flying spray. Soon
the major follows, and here, on a flat,
shelving rock, which revives the warm
rays of the sun through a rift in the
high wall above, we And a comfortable
resting place, from which a fine oppor
tunity is a (forced to study tho physical
details of the falls and their surround
ings. The break In the bed of the river
over which the water falls, is a com
plete semi-circle In form, with the arc
curving up the stream, omd foil wing the
curve of the circle, is at least half a
mile wide. From side to side the flow
of water is of uniform depth and force,
and as it pours in wavy, shimmering
fleeces down the smooth, hard rock, it
presents the appearance of great folds
of snow-while, gauzy lace, gently
swinging and vibrating in the soft au
tumnal breeze. From all alon? the
base rise Immense clouds of trembling,
glittering spray, which gleam and flash
through the rays of the sun, forming
bright rainbow colors that constantly
shift and change. The bisla at the
foot of the falls stretches out in Irregu
lar shape, much wider than the bed of
the stream above or below, and upon
its surface great foaming waves roll
and chase each other, and dash agalust
the shore. So rough are the waters of
this basin, which is a mile wide and
two miles in length, that the major,
whe has had some nautlc.il as well as
military experience, gave us his opin
ion tbat no open boat could successfully
ride its waves. The south wall of the
canon, under which we stood, is cut
and grooved with deep Indentations, at
almost qual distances apart. These
Indentations commence at the apex of
the wall with light shallow furrows,
that are hardly perceptible, and gradu
ally deepen and widen, until near the
base they become deep, broad gorges.
Into these porges the sand and debris
have drifted from above, foming a
good, strong soil, which, baing protect
ed from the hot, scorching sun, and
moistened by the flying spray pro
duces a thrifty growth of cedars,
around which twine, in graceful forai,
great, lusty vines of the wild grape,
now hanging full of long slender
bunches of unripe fiuit. Interwoven
wi th these cedars and vines is a dense
growth of the hazel, alder, and maple,
whose variegated . loliage, with the
Gothic spires of rock towering high
above for a Dackgrouna, iorois a pi- urc
of exquisite beauty, In pleasing con-
last with the awful grandeur of the
river scene. The north wall, on the
Kt-ir forbid,
lrl...uC,.
diag no groove or indentation there.
Its dark columnar structure rises up
tho usands of feet, and agninst Its bass
the waves of the basin lash with fury,
and neither man nor beast dare at
tempt to approach the river from that
side. Robert Briggs iu California for
October.
Victoria' Good Heart.
There Is an advantage, after all, in
being a Qaeeu as well as a women,
when a heroic act is to be recognized
in an effective as well as teuder way.
And it must be acknowledged that
Q jeen Victoria never fails to use this
ber prerogative with admirable and
fine discretion. Two English soldiers,
it will be remembered, Melville and
Coghill, were killed at the battle of
Isandula, Zululand, while bravely at
tempting to rescue the color of tneir
regiment. Their widows were pen
sioned, or course, but the Queen's own
womanly heart suggested a further and
more gracious recompense. She sent
out by the Empress, Eugenie two
wreaths, and the Empress, after she had
made her pilgrimage to the spot where
her son was killed, continued her
journey to find the graves of these ob
scure Erglish soldiers and to lay the
wreaths upon them with her own
hands. She wrote afterward a letter
to the Queen describing the wild. grand
spot where they are burled, the heroic
circumstances of their death, as she
iiad been able to learn them, adding a
few words of earnest sympathy for ;
them and congratulation for the sover- j are the direst source of a large propor
eign who had men so brave to lose; all j tion of the ills that fowl flesh is Heir
of which the Queen copies in her own w r? 8ure t',J't,rme,,,hinS 0.U,.d
. . . 7 ... then be taken to rid them of these pests,
hand and sends with a letter of earnest A( lhf the llce rjQUtjpiyVUn
sympathy to the widows or the dead WOnderrul rapidity taking advantage
heroes. Certainly there Is something of the setting kens and tender chicks,
in being a woman as well as a Queen. When hens are set be sure to sprinkle
Even to a practical American mourn- X""
ing for hfr dead, the knowledge that roaa dust, well mixed with sulphur,
these two women, who had been seated i jn wnicn the- rotj an(i wallow.
upon thrones, had suffered precisely
like herseir, and held out their hands
to her in sympathy, would bring a cer
tain consolation. To loyal English
women the few scribled words would
outvalue all pensions or rewards.
Kailroad Bale.
Tlie uniform of the conductor shall
herealter consist of a seamless sack,
the mouth to be strapped around the
neck like a nail bag. The conductor
shall have his hands tied behind him,
and wear a gag In his mouth. He shall
carry an iron safe on his back, the key
of which will be kept at Altoona.
When ten cent fares are paid on the
train the passenger shall be charged
one dollar extra. The ten cents may
be recovered but the dollar goes to the
conductor or the company, whichever
is the smartest.
The passenger must punch his own
ticket and put it in the safe. lie shall
then tell the conductor where he was
born and where he expects to die when
he goes to. If the conductor . saucy
he must also be punched.
Trains must run on time except when
an excursion or the President's special
car is on the road. On such occasions
all regular lines will be delayed one
hour.
The punch must be carried over the
left hip and the punch on the third
finger of the right band, with the han
dle at an angle of forty-five degrees.
Any deviation will be cause for sum
mary dismissal.
At the end of every trip the conduc
tor must make a written report of the
number of cars, number, color and age
of passenger -, together with any ac
cidents, deaths or births which may
have occurred.
On arriving at the end of his route
the conductor shall be stripped and
scrached with a tooth-pick, nail-brush
and fine-comb to see that he has no
tickets concealed about him.
Xo smoking cars, water tanks or
closets will be allowed on trains which
have a parlor car attached. For any
of these luxuries the passenger mast
pay fifty cents.
A0RICULTUB1.
A Wit Cellar for Keeping Apples.
In iw of the constantly increasing
production of apples and the seemingly
almost universal crop the present sea
son, and as the late-keepers usually
bring the most remunerative prices, it
is ot vast importance that we practice
the best methods or picking, packing
and storing. In this mailer many have
pet theories that are directly opposite
to those of others. For instance, a re
cent correspondent states that among
essentials lor keeping apples is a dry
cellar with cement bottom. Tula is di
rectly opposite to the experience of all
the Iruit dealers who visited ray cellar
for the purpose of inspecting stock dur
ing the past winter aud Hnring, among
them two from West Virginia who
handled thousands of barrels in this
county alone the past season, and ex
tensive fruit growers. One of them re
marked that whenever he entered a
cellar and was compelled to walk on
boards to keep out ol the water, lie was
sure to find ttie fruit in good condition,
allow ing.of course,ihatthe temperature
had been kept as near the freezing point
as possible as is nevessary in either
case. Xow both of these advocates are
enthusiastic In their theories; is it true
that both are correct? As an experi
ment, during appleplcking last tall
selections were made of the Xoi thern
Spy aud Yellow Bellflower, carefully
handled ; each specimeu of the latter
was wrapped separately in paper and
placed iu ventilated packages, and
stored immediately In my cellar, where,
owing to the springy nature of the lo
cation, notwithstanding the thorough
drainage, during the spring months
water will be found on portions of the
earth bottom. Toe result has been
that we are now (July 2) supplied with
samples of the Spy iu a gjod state of
preservation ; the Iielillewer held out
well till Juue 1. Taking into consid
eration that neither variety is classed
among the long-keepers, the latter be
ing what dealers term "holi Jay fruit,"
I am fully convinced tbat by careful
aud Judicious han Jliug, and practising
all the other best known conditions fa
vorable lor keeping fruit, dampness,
or in other worus a wet cellar bottom,
is not detrimental to the long-keepiug
of our winter fruit.
Sowing Fall Gbaixs. The leading
farm work lor this month in many lo
calities is the sowing ot the fall crops.
One cannot expect that the best har
vest will foll jw a careless preparation
of the soil, aud the imperfect sowing
of the seed. The young plants should
get rooted before winter sets in, and in
orrier to insure this, the soil should be
deepand mellow. Wheat requires a soil
pulverized, but compact, with fine tilth
of the surlace, for a seed bed. There
may be lumps on the surfaeeof the soil,
but the seed should not b surrounded
by them, otherwise the plants will be
very uneven, and many gr las will not
start at all, if the sod is lumpy, as it is
in many cases. Use a roller imme
diately after the plow, or alter the har
row has been used once. This is the only
I proper use of the roller on fall sown
, jje, -Jg To foU lhe grouhll after lbe
jKraijgaownisaniistake;itgivestotbe
j surface a smooth pleating appearance,
, tut it is much more inclined to crust
over; besides this, the protecting coat
. ,
would be if the surface was left rough,
Keeping Cikbr Sweet. As apples
are likely to be plentiful this tall a con
siderable quantity will be made into
cider, and the inquiry will frequently
I be made : How can I preserve my ci-
der sweet?" If the following direc
j lions are followed, cider may be pre
served sweet for an indefinite period:
' 1-Vt take nnlr well-riuened. sound ao-
j piefi aaj crush and extract the juice,
i Let the pomace lit. a lew hours before
pressing. Have i everything with which
... .,., tU !.,iv
through a filter as follows? On the
too rut a laver of clean straw, below
fine gravel, or coarse sand washed
clean of dirt, and beneath flannel cloth.
j Such a filter will take out all particles
of pomace, etc., which cause decay.
Haviug the apple Juice pure, put in a
kettle and bring it to a Doll, skimming
off all scum which rises during the pro
cess. While the cider Is still hot or
warm can or bottle it as you would fruit
to preserve it. Bottles may be made
tiht by corking and sealing the same
by dipping the cork in a composition of
resin and tallow melted. The main thing
in the preservation is to keep it from
the air perfectly v The juice of grapes
and other fruits 'may be preserved in
the same way. It is essential In all these
that the product be kept in a cool place,
of neareveu temperature. Uofermen
ted wine, or juice of the grape, is made
and preserved in this way, aud is better
and more healthful than wine made in
ai.y other way.
Vermin is Chiceeb Houses. We
wish we could make every farmer ap-
rtn.n:tA tbat the vrmiii which thev
IH.rmit to Infest their chicken bouses
This, with coal oil poured ou the roost
ing poles every weok or ten days will
keep the lice in check.
Lime slacked with a solution of salt
in water, and then properly thinned
with skiin-niilk, from which all the
cream has been taken, makes a per
manent whitewash for out-door work,
and It is said, renders the wood incom
bustible, it is an excellent wash for
preserving shingles and for all farm
buildings.
The Cci Worm. Two parts of quick
lime, three parts soot, and one part
coarse refuse sails, used as a top dress
ing is said to be destruction to the cut
worm. Refuse salt alone, at the rate
of 500 pound to the acre, In the fall will
destroy tbe worm.
Rye is a hardier grain than wheat,
an J where the soil is not good or well
enough prepared lor wheat, It will be
safer to sow dry.
Anecdote of tho Grand Duke Nicholas.
While the Grand Duke Nicholas was
reviewing the prisoners after the taking
of Flevna his eye caught tbe magnifi
cent Arab horse of al'urkisb officer. He
afterward sent one of his adjfftanistothe
latter to ask if he would sell it, orders
having been given that the captured
officers should retain their horses. The
Turk replied that it was no longer in
his possession, for immediately after
the animal had been remarket by tbe
Grand Duke a Roumanian officer bad
come to him and ordered him to
give it up. He had refused
and demanded the written com
mand of the Priuee. The officer then
drew his revolver, and, threatening to
shoot him, forced him to comply with
hlsflemand. Fortunately for tbe Turk
ish officer the Roumanian had a squint,
and by means of this physical peculiari
ty was soon discovered, and found to
be none other than a staff officer at
tached to General Skobeleff. H" bad
forthwith to surrender bis ill-gotten
spoil, was severely reproved and bas
been obliged to leave headquarters
owing to the odium Into which ha has
fallen.
DOMESTIC.
Ice isd the Stomach. The use of
ice as a luxury, In tdu form of icecream
or of iced water. Is becoming more and
more prevalent in this country. Used
in these ways they are geuerallf taken
especially by the young, reckless! j-,
without a thought of any serious, pos
aiblv fatal, results that may follow. An
aver ige stomach bas a great deal to do
to digest ;hree full meals a day; es
pecially when.as is frequently the case
it Is disturbed and irritated by food
tbat is indigestible because of its quality
or quantity. Let it be remembered
that there is nothing in the body-
blood, muscle, membrane, bone, ten
don, nerve, briin or secretions which
has not come of the contents of the
stomach. Xeither, Is there a thought
a feeling, an emotion, a volition or an
act which has not derived the material
force b.ick of it from the stomach. Such
ku organ must, therefore, be highly
organized. It bas countless arteries,
veins, nerves and glands. It la lined
with a delicate mucous membrane, as
much so as the air tubes. It Is studded
all over with glands which elaborate
and pour into it that wonderful fluid,
the gastric juice. Its coats consist of
different thin layers of muscles ar
ranged crosswise, and these are con
stantly at work, giving it that peculiar
rolling motion by which tbe food is
thoroughly mixed with tbe saliva.
Everv orean and muscle when In ac
tion must have a special supply of
blood. This Is especially true ot the
stomach. Food, therefore, fails to di
gest if the blood is withdrawn from the
stomach, as, for instance, to the
b:aiu by study or close thought, or by
anxiety immediately after eating.
Xow.it is tbe nature of cold to contract
all blood vessels and drive dace tne
blood, and to paralyze, more or less,
all nerves. Oi course the flow of gas
tric Juice is cheeked and digestion Is
arrested, and the proper motion of the
stomach interfered with, by an ice-cold
fluid introduced into it. Further.when
the reaction sets in, the blood vessels
become over distended, producing often
a dangerous congestion,and aa increas
ed thirst, with a longiug for more ice
water, thus inducing a 'vicious circle.'
From what we have said any readet
can see that iced water, or ice cream
should not be taken into the stomach
at tb same time with fcod. Serious
consequences willofteu follow a disre
gard oi this physical law.
D. R. V. Piekce, Consulting Physi
cian to the World's Dispensary and In
valid's Hole), of Buffalo, X. Y., has
resigned his seat in Congress, that he
mav hereafter devote hi whole time
and attention to those applying to the
World's Dispensary Medical Associa
tion for the treatment of Chronic Dis
eases. Each plant to be brought into the
house for winter blooming and those
that have not bloomed much during
the summer are best should be cut
around with a narrow, sharp spade, or
so lie other sharp, thin tool, so as to
leave a ball ot e irt'a that cau be remov
ed with the plant and pla-.-ed in tbe pot.
It will be seen that it is r.easary to
determine the size of the tall pretty
accura.ely, since it is uot to be reduced
afier removal. If there is reason to
suppose that a plaut bas long roots ru li
ning directly downwards, it will oe
necessary to run the spade under it and
cut them off, so that there s tail be no
roots too long for potting. As a result
of cutting about the plauis.all the roots
that are shortened by the operation
will make numerous young rootlets,
and in a fortnight these will have fully
formed, and the plants lll t-ien be
ready to be placed in their pots. A
plaut in the condition now described,
if properly pot ed mil trea el, nill
commence au active g:owtli, 8a-cely
showing a sign of tbe change it bas
been subjected to. The plants may be
lifted any tune before Irost.and two or
three weeks alter the operation of cut
ting around them has been performed.
The pots should be an Inch or two
larger in diameter than tbe balls of
earth, so that from a halt-inch to an
inch of the prepared soil can be placed
between the ball and tne pot.
Growing Mignonette as a Tree.
Choose a straight young plant; tie it
to a slender suck ; keep the side shoots
uipped from the lower part of the
plant, but let all the single leaves re
main, also the side shoots on the upper
portion. When tbe flower buds form
n:p them off; a multitude of oung
shoots will put out after this; wl en
they have grown to be three or four
Inches long a few of them must te se
lected, and the balance cut away. The
number wiil depend on the size and
strength of the plant; certainly not
more than eight should be left, six
would better. They must be equal
distances apart, aud should be trained
to a small hoop supported at the pro
per Le'gl t 1 he sejoud flower buds may
oe left on, but before they open a sec
ond hoop must be added to the treliis,
and the branches secured symmetrical
ly to It. Be careful to remove every
flower belore any seed pods have time
to form. This system of pruning and
training is to be carried on and lu the
course of time tbe stems and branches
will become woody and tbe 'tree" will
blooai almost constantly.
It takes but one inai to snow the
puiity and merit of Dobbins', Electric
Soap, (made by Cragln A Co., Phila
delphia.' For your own interest give
it tbat one trial. All grocers keep it.
Chicee.v Matonxaise. Cut up toxe
chickens and try them nicely in butter.
Let them get cold, then tfim into good
shape and put them In a covered dish
with salt, pepper, oil and vinegar as
for salad ; add a few pieces of onion
and a little parsley. Let them stand
thus two or three hours. Then drain
the pieces of chicken, place them on the
lettuce in your salad dish and spread a
nice msyonnaise dreesingover all.
Son e of the chicken when fried can be
saved for tomato stuffing.
A good brine to preserve any green
material is made in this way : Eight
pounds of salt, one galloi: of vinegar,
one gallon of water, a l .mpof alum, as
big as n hen's egg; use cold. Things
dropped into tins brine, such as green
tomatoes, cucumbers, peppers, string
beans, cauliflower, etc., wiil keep till
wanted to use, or for a year, taking
care tr hare the brine cover the ma
terial it contains.
STUFrrxo for Veal. Chop half a
pound ol suet, pui it in a ba in with
three-quarters of a pound of bread
crumbs, a teaspsonful of salt, a quar
ter of pepper, a little thyme, three
whole eggs, mix well. A pound of
bread crumbs aud one more egg may
be used ; it will make it cut firmer.
If a tin teapot has become bro rn ln
side.and the tea made In it tastes brick
lsh, put In a little washing soda, sott
soap and water, pour the water out in
a pan. put In your dish-cloth an-.l wipe
quickly Vour the water back and boil
again ; repeat several times and it will
all wipe off almost as bright as new.
Snaps. Take one cup ot molasses,
three-quarters of a cup of sugar, one
tablespoon each of powdered cloves,
cinnamon, and alspice. Add these to
one-half cup of melted butter and beat
in two teaspoons sod.i,and flour enough
to roll. Roll very thin, cut out with a
tin cutter and bake in pins in a hot
oven.
Cbab apple and quince jellies are
really improved by adding one-third
of apple to them.
"Ah, how well do I remember It
was in the bleak Xovember." when I
caught the Cold that was wearing me
surely and swiftly away; but I heard
of Dr. Bull's Cough Syrup; took It,
and am as well as ever.
WIT AND HUMOR.
He d!d not bave the right kind of
face to Inspire confluence, and hi
clothes looked as if they had served a
third term at lea-t. "Are you the fel
low who makes fun of people in the
Aetc" The ne-vspaper man owned
up he was "thar or tharabouts."
" Well. I come to wart you. They are
layin for you with clubs. They are
bad." "Xot to hurt, I reckon." "Yes
they are; but don't be afeared; I'm
your friend. I can stave my fist
through a man and walk off with him
on myarm, just like he was an empty
market basket." "Oh, get out." "I'm
not joking. I'm your friend, and I am
down on your enemies. Look here.
C:m' you lend a feller a qnarter?
temporarily, only, of course." "Xow,
you look here. Didn't you just now
sav you were my friend?" "oo I am."
"You don't talk like it,but I'll take you
at your word." "Jest count on me."
"You say you want to help me, anJ
you want to hurt mv enemies?"
"That's about the size of it." "Then
you go and borrow a quarter from them
aud loan it to me." Adjourned.
A voi'NO lady named Collins, of
Quarry vllle, Lancaster county, while
iu the act or getting into a hammock
which was suspended about four feet
from the ground, fell, striking upon
her bead aud shoulders, and was ren
dered unconscious. Before under
taking to mount a fiery, untamed ham
mock, a young lady should learn the
art or swiugingon the flying trapeze,
hanging by her toes from a horizontal
bar, and riding a bareback horse and
jumping through flour-barrel hoops.
She should first try something a little
more simple than getting into a ham
mock. It Is just lovely to sleep In the coun
try these flue mornings, with a gobbler
gobbling under your window and a
calf bellowing like a concert saloon
baritone on tbe side of the house, while
a eow, his mother, is hallooing mezzo
soprano on the other, and roosters are
crowing and the milkmaid is playing
tambourine with the bottom ot the
milk pail and drivers are going by
whistling and the parrot Is yelling at
tbe goat that talks back and a half
dozen boys are throwing green apples
on the roof to see them roll down and
the landlord is swearing at his wife at
the back kitchen because she has put
too many mackerel to soak for "them
city hogs." Tbe country is a real quiet
place for cemeteries.
A Scotchman has invented a new
musical instrument, which combines
the strains of the bag pipes, a file, ac
cordion, a hand-organ, aud the tri
angle. As tbe man who was daring
enough to play the first one In this
country was torn to pieces by an out
raged public, it is not likely the instru
ment will become popular outside of
Scotland. Our poople prefer the music
made by filing a saw or riveting a
boiler.
rrofllablo i'atieuta.
The most wonderful and marvelous
success in cases where persons are sick
or wasting away from a condition of
iniserableness. that no one knows what
ails them, (profitable patients for doc
tors, is obtained by the use or li"p
Bitters. They begin to cure from the
first dose and keep it up until perfect i
health and strength is restored. Who
ever is afflicted in this way need not
suffer, when they can get Hop Hitters.
Cincinnati lr. .
A wealthy unstart goes to a sa'es
S'abie to buy a pa r o carriage horse.-;
'-Here are a sample oi fine Englh bred
mares," says the proprietor. "Eng
lish bred I 1 hey will not do." "Why?"
"My coachman is a Frenchman."
"Well." "if they were raised in Eng
land they could not understand a word
he said."
"See here, Georgie," said a fowl (
mamma to her little son as th"y walked
on tbe beach, "what a lot of nice little j
round stones." "les," grumbled
Georgie, as he cast a searching glauce
around, "and not a- blessed thing to
throw 'era at!"
"1'Lt teach you to He, and s eal, and
smoke, and use profane language, "said
an irate Galveston parent to his eldest
offspring, at tbe same time swinging a
good sized sapling. "I'll teach you,
you young s.-amp." "Xever mind,
father, I know all them branches al
ready." Vassar girls sin? : "Here's to Vas
sar College, drink it down." But it
can't be done. We bave heard of men
drinking "old stone fence," and drink
ing up a $ 10.000 property, but a man
could never swallow Vassar College.
The water-spout would stick in his
throat, and the beauty the institution
contains would intoxicate him before
he had "bolted" a door.
Tue last rose of summer and the first
oyster ot autumn are in such close con
junction that it is difficult to tell where
tbe perfume of one ceases and the -ticking
good flavor of the other begins.
The girls have now got the business
card fever and merchants are vying
with each o. her in getting out attrac
tive cards. We suspect collusion with
the job printers on the part of the girls.
And now a poet starts off with : "I
love to see my darling's happy smile."
Then we ask, why In the name of com
mon sense he turns the light down so
low ? Perhaps now he had rather feel
the smile than see it.
At a restaurant : "Take away the
sauerkraut, there's a ha rinlt." "Mon
sieur, you astonish me, I thought I had
picked them all out."
'Thf.ee is one ih ngtbls rej lp, sail
an old faru.er, ".has youT. always find
true to the core, and that's the apple
worm."
A Yorxo physician asking permission
or a lass to kiss ber, she replied : "No,
sir; I never like a doctor's bill stuck in
my face."
Cuicauo girls toe la. Tbat gives
more room on the sidewalk. Boston
girls toe out, so as to be ready to turn a
crook in the street at a second's warn
ing. .
Another poet comes forward and
says "And i hear the hiss of a scorch
ing kiss." Beats all what a man can
bear if he is only meat enough to
listen.
There Is a good deal sa:d about the
"cotton belt," but it probably refers to
the velvet belt. We notice these are
orn a good deal by the girls.
How high Is the cat's waul ? The
cat has no wall. A fence or the ridge
pole of tbe woodshed answers every
purpose.
"Made New a rain."
St. Catharines, Out.
R. V. Pierce, M. D. :
1 have used your Favorite Prescrip
tion, Golden Medical Discovery and
Pleasant Purgative Pellets, for the last
three months and find myself (what
shall I say) "made n:u again." are the
only words that express it. I was re
duced to a skeleton, could not walk
across the floor without fainting, could
keep nothing In the shape of food on
my stomach. Myself and friends had
given up all hope, my immediate death
seemed certain. 1 can uever be too
thankful to those who recommended
your medicine, for I now live (to the
surprls of every body) and am able to
do my own work. I desire to make
this statement in order that those suff
ering may not despair until they have
given your remedies a trial,
yours resp'y
Mrs. Wm. D. Rtcemax.
A Curious Phykat J'Amtenon.A
curious nbvsical phenomenon bas
been lately described br Dr. Grass! In
tbe Proceedings of the Royal Institute
ot L-nubardy. An apparatus is for
med ol three coneeutric vessels witn
au annular space about twoceutimeters
betweea the first and the second, and
tbe second and the third. Tbe quter
space is tilled with oil, and the next
with water. The oil is heated by a
gas furnace to a little over 100 deg., and
the water boils. Then hot oil at, for
example, lo'J deg., is poured into the
cenual space. This quickly cools to
a temperature close to 100 deg. ur.
Grissl found that tbe central oil cooled
inore'rapi lly the higher the tempera
ture of the outer oil; and with more
delicate apparatus (la which the vapo
rized water was conducted and retur
ued, aud the outer oil kept at any re
quired constant temperature) he arri
ved at definite numerical results,
which he tabulates. With the outer
oil at a meat; temperature ot 129 V deg,
for instance, the time of cooling of the
Inner oil from 11J deg. to 110 deg. was
-iv seconas; wnen tne lormer was iw i
deg. the latter was 87 seconds. Alco
hol aud ether gave more decided re
sults. The maximum difference was
obtained with ether; the outer oil be
ing at 57 deg., the Inner took 35 se
conds to cool from 57 deg. to 50 deg.
(7 ); whereas the former being 3a 3
deg. , the latter became 33 a seconds,
in all the experiments the cooling ot
the inner oil commenced at a tempera
ture little above the maximum or the
external oil. When tbe outer oil is at a
hixher temperature, at a certain point
the heat begins to prevail, which is
transmitted directly from the outer to
the inner oil. An analogous pheno
menon (to which Dr. Grassi refers)
was that of some members of the Aeca-
demia del Cimento, who round that tbe
water in a vessel surrounded ty Ice
cools more rapidly if the ice be heated
to accelerate lusion.
Vegktine. The great success of th
Vegetine as a cleanser and purifier ol
tbe blood is shown beyond a aouDt v
the srreat numbers who bave taken I
and received Immediate relief, wits
such remarkable cures.
1'h ot graphing under teeter. The recen t
ray bridge disaster naturally turned
the attention of photographers to ways
and means of taking photographs of
the submerged carriages and girders.
If the water Is clear enough ror tbe
eye of tbe diver to discern the wreckage
lying at the bottom, it Is also clear
enough to allow of pictures forming
within the camera. The Idea of pho
tographing under water is not a new
one, and has been frequently discussed ;
but difficulties have arisen from tbe
f act that photographers being unaccus
tomed to divine, cannot accompany
their instrument, and that the slightest
sgitation ot tbe apparatus will blur
aud spoil the protrait. it is therefore
necessary to construct a steady apara
tus, which a skillful diver may be able
to manipulate. Two Scotch photo
graphers have devised apparatus ans
wering tbe purpose, and one ot them
has taken several photographs in the
i'rita ol Clyde, near Gourock. One
view represents a sandy bottom, with
a number ot liugli boulders shaggy
with sea-weed strewed around, to
gether with an old anchor. The camera
is ineloted in an water-tight case, and
fixed to a loaded tripo I, which is low
ered into th i water. Wheu the latter
has reached its position on the bottom
the camera cover is withdrawn by
means of a pull-cord ; but electricity
cuuid be utilized for the maneuver.
Apart from its value in accurately por
traying submerged structures, the uew
nppliauce would Le very uselul ou
deep-sea exploring expeditious, for
taking pictures of coral reels and other
wouders of the deep.
Yjt tulle Wax. In the Island of Ja
va a speeles ot wax Is obtained from
Ficus jHtnmiJtua, probably by drying
tbe pith. '1 nia wax Is used for lights,
and is manufactured In hard lumps ol
a chocolate color ; it becomes sott in
heat, melts at 60 deg.-70 deg. C; loses
in boiling water its brown coloring
matter, and becomes nearly white, it
is partially dissolved in boiling alco
hol, about one-third of It en'ering into
solution and being deposited on cooling
lu a tnatnuiillated form. Wueu trea
ted with cold ether It separates in'o
two parts, which are untqually solu
ble. These can be isojaied by meai.s
of solutions in ether and by fractional
precipitations after rejeatcdand nu
merous additions of alcohol. The least
soluble part melts at 62 deg,, and,
by analysis, it is found to have a com
position which is expressed by the for
mula C 11 O. With perchlorlde of phos
phorus it gives a chl -ride which is in- j
soluble in water. The most soluble
part crystallizes in a mixture of ether
and alcohol, melts at 73 d g. Its com
position seems to be C U O . The de
colorated wax, if submitted to a dry dis
tillation, yields, among other products,
a crystalline substance and an oil.
The first one if crystallised in petrole
um ether, forms beautiful clusters of
crystals, w hlch melt at 67 deg., and
form a liquid, the bollieg point ol
which is 250 deg. nitricaeid irant
forins It into a crystaillzable nitrate.
retroUum to preserve wood. The prl
mary cause of decay in wood Is the fer
mentation and decomposition of the
sap that is within the pores. Wood,
pure and by itself, is not easily destroy
ed by the ordinary agencies of nature,
namely : wet and dry weather, heat
aud cold, etc. If the sap within the
pores can be either removed or render
ed inactive, the wood may be preserved.
There are several methods of doing
this, such as saturating the wood with
mineral salts, creosote, etc. The cheap
est, easiest, and therefore the best
method, seems to be to charge the wood
with crude petroleum. Pine, for ex
ample, is made almost water proof by
saturating it with this material, and
therefore made much more lasting.
Crude petroleum is very cheap, and
msy be applied with brush until the
wo xl will take no more. In tbe appli
cation, care should be tskeu to avoid
accidents from fire, and not approach
the work with a flame until it is dry.
A u application of petroleum is especi
ally valuable to much exposed wood
woi k, as, for example, the shingles on
buildings, which bj actual experience
are fouud to be rendered much more
durable.
Hot a HoTerago.
"They are not a beverage, but a
medicine, with curative properties of
the highest degree, containing no poor
whiskey or poisonous drugs. They do
dot tear down an already debilitated
system, but build it up. Oae bottle
contains more hops, tbat is, more real
strength, than a barrel of ordinary
beer. Every druggist in Rochester
sells them, and the physicans prescribe
them. Jitening Express on Hop Bitters.
One drawback to the recently disco
vered audiphone has been Its large cost,
but M. Coiladon, of Geneva, has, after
cons.derable exjerim ntinz, so simpli
fied and cheapened the instrument,
that a serviceable audiphoue can now
be purchased for fifty centimes, instead
of titty francs, the former priee. He
substitues a variety of tbln pasteboard
for lhe hardened rubber heretofore
used.
"It's growing m right rapidly.
My head can now be seen
l,lke other heads, in silken locks.
Thanks to my Carbounk."
"My umbrella Is' getting decidedly
shabby," said a young man about town
one evening last wet k. - "I believe I
will bave to s:nke another prayer meet
ing the fiist rainy night."
Jh,e teredo R ival.i Vu s timber for
food, aud not to form aburrow. It eats
the small chips which It rsmoyea.
g.t- - -
i . iiuklr.lrAnerS.
tendered from want of exercise, by
fakmg Simmon,' Liver Regulator It
U a harmless vegetable fon
numbers who have tried it will conn
denUv aUrt that it is the best remedy
humors of the blood. 'S,'
restores the kidneys to healthy 'action
and drives out the despondency and
Zo. or ill health. The pa"7'nf
feels a. If he had taken a ne w lease oT
lite, and Is overjoyed
ressed feeling dissipated, the costive
habits corrected and new streams of
health coursing through bis veins.
"Simmons' Liver Regulator is a very
valuable remedy for Dyspepsia, Sick
Headache, Torpid Liver, Constipa
tion, Piles and such like diseases.
"W. S. Holt, President of S. .
R. Co., of Georgia. "
Tho IMcw Told Mo
to take a blue pill, bat I didn't, for I had al
ready been ptiaoued twice by mercury, lhe
drn.uist toid me to try Kidney-Wort, and I
did. it wu just too thing for my biUonaueao
tnd eoneipton, and I uo am an well a
..ao A ifniiivlfs
Yegetine.
Bore to He tHan Gold.
iLTOLa, Masa , March T..1590. 1
wmo"S, you what ;'?,T.S
forme. 1 have been troubled wlin ETyiMpenw
Sainor (or more than W year, la myUrnnd
other parts oi my body. a.Kl hae boej Pat
wn.rir. I nmencd UKlnif Valine one
rear airo la Angus, and can truly a T it Je
JonelSrVtorme .han .r JSi
seem to 0 perfidy free Irom this h and
can recommend It to every uie. ould loot b
without ihm meUlclne 'Us more to me than
goli-ind I teei it U prove a blessing toothers
as 11 has to me. .
Yours, most respefall
J. BENTLEY. H-ID., says z
t kae doae naoro cood tbaa saetfl
eal SroAtaoeaS.
kkwmabkkt, ouu. Fsb. t, use.
Mr. H. R. frrsTEMK, bwton, Masa.-
Sir I have sold 00x117 the pstyrs con
(lderable quantity ol your Vtgetlne. and I be
ueve. In all oases it tas frtvea a lUJaoilon. la
one e iiw, a delicate young tody of about It
T-ars wo much b-neOted by Its use. Her pa
rem infotiued mo that It had done bar mors
cood thaa all the muval treatment 10 vhlfifc
aha had previously been subjected.
yours. P'.,..1SXLKTM.D,
Loudlj in its Praise.
Toronto, Ont., March s, isss.
H. R. PrrrsKa. Buxton:
Dear sir lUnaldermir the short time that
VegeUne has been before tbe l abile here. It
Belt wen as a blond eurtder. and lor irouM-s
arhtlng from a slucglsh or torpid liver It is a
nrst-ciass medicine. Our customers speak
loudly la Its piuBo.
J. WBIGHT S CO.,
Cor. Queen and Elizabeth Streets.
Vesetine.
rurABBD ST
H. SI- STEVES , Bwtn, Ma
Vegetine is Soil bv all Druggists.
0 0 KUBMra
The accumulated evi.it 11. e of nearly thlrtv
years show thit th" Bitters U a certain remedy
for m:lar!al dloea.se. aa well as Its surest pre
ventive ; that It eradicate- dynpepsla, c ntl
ratioo, liver complaint and nervoiianess. count
eracts a tendency to gout, rheumatism, orlnary
and niertne dl-orders, mat H tor ana vigor 10
the teeble, and cheers the mind v hilo it lnvigo
ra" tue body.
ror sale by all Prasrirlsta and Dealers
veneraliy.
P
HOP BITTERS
(A Hediclae, aoS a, Drink.)
C03TAT5S
nors, Brnir, mandrake,
DANDEIJOM,
A-fl m TrT aaro Bwr MrT.TrLQr ATI
tiks ur au. oraas BiTraaa.
TIIKY CUliK
AH Tl!Wmr of th"Wofrmrh. Bowrln. Plnod.
J,iTcr. kidney. and rnnury-onrann. Nt
Tuumwis. Slrf pieiwtanl eptiall;
Fetikalt CasmrtLaJnu-
8IOOO IN COLD. -
wm be pid for m rw they win not rare ocJ
BCip.or sot wuiiK impure writtjuritta.
found la Lb em.
Atkyrmr drapiMftt for B"! Bitter aM try
Lbem before joa alctrp. Take ttier.
D I.C. lwanaWliirendlTTeMwrltrrTTrvfor
DroakeuucM. use of plum, ubavcaal
narcotics.
Skxd fob Ciectlab. 1
GEORGE ACHELIS
WoaS kMrr. CkimSrr S'MMy , )ak.
Ffaa ! a fnll liar rf M'K-KKY sTlit-k.to
kana. tptialtiea fr til. fmii rtallnklpi
C-. AppI. Pmh Ld Sltrrrj' Irm.
mtBO.I'loato in ir ana will uuai.titM,
OffTtpfltHtn. m t if .1
M 1 I 1
0 f S I P.O MCKI
A HAS and nMaiati
rrte. Addraoa
CSI. Anciuta. Ma.
mm
IB
b- a
All t4w sold tw JiwtoK
He Vkptw Mir. C.. R vSmW, N. T.. A 1
CssBwawjaflaaaavj
or wM few JnnWK I
. B vSW, y. t.. A Trm to. Awt. I
KHJHEY DISEASES. -c .BSJffi?!!?5
I Vy OMvaeef mmwr.mnm-r
aawtaa aaak aa kwjawan
Smmt.mtvtS,wtMZlJfa-"'"" in
90mm yakMfrvaAleaolla bum, whtTw TH-S! -"" vdwa.- m
m, snnrrr-woBT. tni katti awiLiTMMaTi t? VT T TS M nmw
iWAoiyatyAWT-
TH. iMtiltal auinanl
flw WerWa IMdmit aad lavalitto'
aava aanaany Dea treated.
jwuy
WEAKNESSES PECVUAR TO FE3XALES.
1 rTeacrrDUaa la a afVBMkBsrWI SArivm rsM mm - - - - m . .
" :
.aVTi wh,Tu'SrL'Si 21522L "a "J;
P r-cHpti. h wort 7u. T hr iZi.VV"' .,hV- wM
BIIBOT IBMiinilB H IB riMlthBd ! al i
waa adnadrm uutnt trota alwriaewoaNra, liii!T?X52z2,,$z',W?mmr "Prve jwars ara I
iinr- in irwnir i wiiiiBtau
The Only Remedy
that Acta at the aaa Ttaw
la Lhrer. Tts Bawtls and Th j ridssnu
Ja4s 60OVVM9 ocvion owi h woadtfrrat
tmrr to CUTKUt diuvn.
- . . . 1 . -11
Why Ae We Sick?
. Ia m miiam tktm ortai Oram to U-l
Itxn m UitftftTS farctd into tks iLadJ
. . . . . - 1 n
s, PUea. Camtiaatio. IuJ
.lata aa DlaeaM. Haas-
bt cami1 jr actum V''"??'
WkTkanVrllilloaapalaaaa aratal
I " .1 t-J -Ilk Pilaa. raaatimtltml
Vhreadara hitwi orairk aradachatl
Way have aleealeiai alcatal
VtS wuk r ana rr mi
litaWL II is a dry, wtalU compound nui
s-i nitir" -" 1
I ' u - Dptwrufi Aa aiil anLi it
b v Wnryem. Pries,
W I WTUt r Barltaot . Vl
3
WELCOyaECHOStl'M. (Jl.r Bv W. .
TlL'en lor IHKQ Schools. Just our. bo4i
BE1X8) pocia.) By L. U. Kmt-nmn. j t
out; orOommoo scliO'le. Vt kite Kofcea.
(SO cm.) lor ouuaav bcuxoih.
PARLOR 0BGA2T ISSTRUOTION BOOK
(fl.MI). By A. X. Johnson. Is ont of S'nt ahead
of any others In teaching- betfnnerH on heed
organ, bo h secular and sacred music. Suuctar
School. Temperance. Gospel aal 11 ma music.
All teachers lake to It at unce.
CHOIRS AST) SIUGISQ CLASSES
3 will not fnnret onr three superior bonks :
VslesafWartkla.l l.b; LO. Emerson:
ToaBflot'.,by w u. rvrkm.-,and He hots
tor tlBlB Clae. v cents;, by A.
N. jobn-on.
CHOIRS will ter ABthean
Beka thuM ur
3 AMERICAS ASTHK.M BOOK (l.Strt, bv John
son, Terinev and Abbey, or .MKK.ov9 AN
THEM BOOK (S1). by t. O. Emerson, or
. AN I BEX HARP (St ). oy W. O. Perkins.
TEXrEBAXlE PEOPLE will k anr
tm
3TKMPEBAXCK JEWBI-S (S3 etsA hy Tenner
A Hoffman: orTKMi-fc.KA.NrK LIi.iiT t c.
by llusit A Servos ; or Ht'LLS TEMfE
- HANt fc. tLEK BOOK, (40cfa).
Specimen copies ot any book mailed for above
prices.
Oliver Ditson & Co., Boston,
j. E. Brnox. ro,
IM Wtre. tfilualril-
ENCYCLOPEDIA
TIOUETTEIBUSINESS
Tlva tbo tit apt acj only roBisUte ar.d rtia
tl work cut C-MinU mini Jlui a- mjmt S;mM
finna. It t11 if-w to frforu all the arinadtf
!. life, ami bow to appottr to lbs baa airatag
ao atl orcarna.
AsEN Si W AXTKD.Send for circnUra eon tain
fauia fall da-enatlon - t th work itti extra torn u
Ag-au. Addre SATIoNAl. r I IiL.lsUi.Si CO.,
in.Uulb a. Pa.
SAPONIFIER
telkaOM Bailable CoaaaetrataS Lfe for WkM FLY
SOAP MAKING. Pirectioa arajmpMy ak ea
for maklax Hard. Sttft mod Tlle vSis.
It la tali vraigal mad Mr-airUk.
JBJSK FOR HAPONiriEIW
AND TAKE NO OTBIB.
nsuB'A BAIT MAxvrm c pbhab a
MAKE HENS LAY.
Aa Btnllla ataraaiT Barfaoa aa4 C beta HI, ae
am valine a tbiacoantr7atbBU aaoatof me Hare
aad Oattla Pewdare bare are worrbteaa Craaa. Ha
aavetxat fbertdaa Cand tMo FowOera ara aaea
loialj aera aai tmmeaaely Tavluai t. Saib'ag aa
earth iU sake baua la 7 like Vberrdaaa ivaditioa
Peadera. aa f-haota W an- pi at af feed,
bald every v bare- or eenr b rr all for wight lecea
Aaaae. L ft. JO it A SOU A CO., Iuin, He.
CAS BAKE S3 PER deAT
Belelua; oar caw
Platform Family Sct!s
Wrif be er-raHT to 35 Ba
Ita h tDdaume eper.nce er-ti it
at pifht ru b a--Ke-er Retail
ncr $a Oih r taiTy Kaj-a
weibai.tf 2 lbe. can uot b bo ebt
f"T Vfm tl.a-i Ai. A rair
Baiaa far Affefta. k.ie afie terrfu ry
Term ana r- a a eJ. rjr r nl . acent . end for
aaritcaUra. fn.it KSTiC bCALK CO., 17 W aa
fera-t. Ciaclnaeii. Ottio.
EM Apis!
Mail at a P:ett ; eoar
aior.e I- will .u.
A. jt'RTOM A TO., 5
CwDo.erca St.. Pbtia-, Pa.
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