American citizen. (Butler, Butler County, Pa.) 1863-1872, December 09, 1863, Image 1

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    VOLUME 1.
IP pnblished erery Wednesday in thabnrtiOgjk off Butler,
l.v taoau Ko»i *SOV ft C. K.Am»muio> •*» Wain
oppotite t<> J.vk's Ilouil—office op maim is the fcrick
f.-rmerijif occupied by Kll Yetlfr,a«» #t<>re
Tek**:—si 50 a rear. if paid in adrance, * wit*!ln the
flrnt «ix of #_ if not paid until aftor the expira
tion of tb« flr«t nix months.
11 OF AI'VKKJISI>U One ,-«<iuare n<n~ |ten line* or
thre#- tnsnrrton* ...... 4*
Kvery «nbe*nTvnt rwt square 4*.
card* of 1" line#or few f»r one y eir.fu.-lu
ll.• • ». A 00
Oi»m . ri" ii»!. - 1 « i *'•»• pnjHTi. 100
txHiiutu -i* ................... 7 00
*?column 112 >r one )«-u --X-t,
rolumti r r «ix in ntln *4 '3
iN'lumn t'-»r y«ir.. m '*.»
'— ——^
v,«k V y.
We reaelie 1 Lake in thcaftifnixin.
Onv and I.(I have mentioned air. idy
how we had started off; spurred oil—tiny,
that is—by Lou's letter to me describing
her flirtation with Captain Itaynor.) As
a matter of course, every one was on n |
tin 1 piazza of the hotel; and as we >p |
the steps, I spied Lou at once, walking w i
a gontleuian. whom 1 guessed to be Cap
Kaynor. They were at the other end o
the piazza, however, and as yet did not -
us. t living (iuy. therefore a bint, we -li|
ped in quietly. to get ofl a little o!
mid staiu.ol" travel, before offering the en
emy battle.; though, here I wish to re
mark. that I consider in\-elf justly emitted
to the credit of the entire campaign, if;
credit there be. as (iuy bad quite !■ -t bis)
heart, and, had I u >t prevented him. would l
have rushed up to lam at once, grii vol 112
and angry, and as unlike his usual -ell as |
lie could well be, out of delirmn. N I
1 h ave observe'! that, with anything hu
man, very much depends on a first i IJ ' - J
sion ; and lion, though lovely, not be a i |
angel, meeting liny with a sense of d' eat
strong upon him. would accord him a I'u J
different reception than would beextendad j
to him in bis normal mentalcondi|i»««;*nd
on this text I held forth, whfle we wen
dressing in what tbc clerk faticiously styled
.our room. 1 would have dubbed it, want
of room. Doctor Guy writhed, as people
are apt to do under the surgeon's knife and
good advice; but he listened and calmed;
and, by the time we went down. I think 1
inay say that 1 had him well in hand.
Tt was a delicious evening, close to twi
light, the skv all rosy with promise of n 1
.rowinu morrow. »ud the band placed a®- !
tie away under the trees, playing tl <*e
thrilling, bewildering, enslaving waltzes of
Strauss. We silt down tly, each with
n cigar, looking as though we might have
been found there since the flood,or at any
rate, to draw it mild, as if »u had spent
there the greater portion of the afternoon
That was a strategy on my part —done t.
startle and confound Lou; for seeing u
tlicrcs'o quietly, the first question n. istb.
What we saw, and how much ? Soon I saw
her coming, holding Capt. s am
and looking up in his face and then awn\
in a maimer very charming—to Captain
lla\«or. Then the little gipsy spied u
or rather mo, nnd came simpering : Mr.
Martial, dear Mr. Martial, when did you
come? why did'ntyou write tome? l»o
long have you been here?" And here.-'
short, changing from red to pai
and back again, nnd looking piteouslv it
me; for she had recognized (iuy. For a
moment she hesitated ; but Lou BaraC'de
was a lady, and guided by a true womanly
instinct; and in a moment she held out
her hand, frankly saying:
•• Is it really you. (iuy ? I should never
have dreamed of ucing you here; b»t. 1
think you will like Lake." Andthen
turned to her companion.
"Captain liaynor, gcntlouien. Jink,
will you .show Doctor (,'uy the lions fur a
while? I have so many tilings to say and
of Mr. Martial."'
'•Jack 5" Lou Haracole. who had trcat«
Xid even Doctor <iuy with such overwhelnU
in" dignity, called that man Jack I I sto.i,|
confounded, till the little witch, taking UM
by the arm, drew me away, calling as slit
" Wo will meet you at tlie inn pie gn.vr
yonder. You know tlie place, Jack." I
"Are you anxious to hear of a duel 112
nsked 1. significantly.
Fhcgrewa little pale at that.
"No; what an idea, a.* if t jay would b
BO absurd." "
'• Men in his position do strange thiugi
'■ 11 is position'. Wlm* i8 hispositionto
JJIC? Wt are UQtbi*g to each other."
'■ Is it so ria*v, tlierr, to hr«»k vowg ;i
£>indibg in the tight of God, if not of ;1.
llaw. af* those of it.arriag<> t"
" I do not consider it in the light."
"So much the worse."
" Mr. Martial, did you come down here
lecture me?"
'• i"ou asked me for advice!"
"But you are scolding."
"No, lam telling you the truth."
" I did not think you oould be EO un
" What have I done ?"
"Yon brought Guy down here."
"No; the train did that." • *
" Please don't quiz me now. What «d
ioe come for?" . /
It I
i.. ■ ' hi 11 i i
j -Toenjovrte eecncry. and change of
I air."
I " But what •<■) Ito do?"
"You say yosarc nothing to each other!
in that c;t-e. <_■" !»n a- before."
Hilt ! do liice I 'ms tittle*, and when I
see him it maliir- me mi mi*—liiisera
■She wascryiisg. Peoplebejan to look
at me. They Would think •me nil old
brute, :md 1 vriwti't sure that I was not one
'• For Heavens pake. Lmj, don't cry," 1
urged. "Thials of the jieople."
"1 can't help it. Guy looked at meso :
he hates inc.''
'• Nothing of the sort, lie come here
purposely for a reconciliation."
'•Hut he watt in the wrong."
"1> rtlliw."
" And ought to the first advan
• Then you ihonldgive hifi the least
ojipi irtunity."
Hy this time we were at theniaph trees.
1 tain Uayiioi looked a jiltle aw rly at
I.i s red eves, but retained liisusualcoin
tre. (itiv «t.irc«dy spoke. Lou fidg-
I and jdavet! with the charms on her
( itclaillc; finally. Ml Mr wati h. to
the hour, in so doing, a little locket
■ i 'tngopea.
Instas 11v lon flo died. hurtling red. and
*ml too much confident even to think of
- m_- 1 ' iin i(:i,-::r's fiirr > li.i'lig
i 1 and darkt ue-1 instantly.
It was Guy's miniature.
Guf was radiant, *n ten minut»" torn
tVat tiui'' he had l<ou on his «rth, and was
ofr ontlic pin7.ui. T1" T came buck radi
,VJWHp]ier t IK HI secured a trfr-a fitr
with mr.
■•Dour Mr. Martial, I am so much oblig
ed— 1 "
"Indeed! Tor what?" >
" Von km w veil cnoii'jli. For bring
in;' Guy hciv."
••The i. yoi ale roconeiled."
"Oh ym."
"Ai who IHMIC the first advances?"
1 .oil (olored.
1 liirdly know. Mr. Martial. You
know li w we wi nt off. liul vou don't know
how 1 ( It. I cmMu't find a word tosay
till wi Vent and sat down in the parlor.
Then I began !o say something about
Lute Pia's drci s, to which hcanswered :
"I diln't come here. Lou,todiseiiKSthe
I w;U nettled at that.
" lie rood cm ugh to direct the conver
sion tt what will please you," said I.
'•I an a bear " said Guy, penitently,
but thei I »iu no miserable."
An all beam miserable?"
" Doi't jest."
Wht shall ' do? Tic silent?
11ae you nothing to my to me?"
I uwould.-nubmcagain."
Wh.t a little Hurron you arc! 1 nev
er saw nything n revengeful. Can't you
Id i t'el iw oft' iihen he is sorry, without
in king lim goifown on his knees?"
" Vou are sorry, then ?"
* " Yes.'
" Forvrhat ?"
"Witt a queiSwa!"
"I at anxioin to prevent a misunder
standini. 1 thuucht that you treated me
very ill you at the time thonght not."
" Hut:hen you wouldn't hear reason."
''Pefcaps our definitions differ."
lie \rs silctil at t) t. and 1 ■ -kii> LT at
him, 1 liw his face working, and saw.
too, tha{ if we wanton that way. we should
quarrel; gain, So 1 said to him: "Oh I
Guy. wi were both wrong, and 1 am very
sorry fotmy folly." And that helped his
lordship lewn, n adea sort of ladder, on it
were. ti| ho Ya 'ley of Humiliation, and
after til# we can tie on famously,
" I'rai>!"
I waoirulyde ighted. anil took fatherly
. .ire them, having contributed so
largely, i my think'" •. it lea-t. to their
happinej ; but :bere was something yet
to come.
f'itt u{ modr Ji a window. T hoard a
voi.-e irfioot tb 3 window. Captain llay
liisaisna, eljj ureniembera conver
-niijn hjisome sixaiouths ago, in which
yt a d. -it (■!, thn if a imui loved
vrmtld m(v<! of lliai tliehuuibk-.-t an In. -i
- i'-ervi#,t of aortaW? that you would
k p him fur month* insus| HUM*. that you
•id tot ore wit If flattery, and make
hiu revel hits p anion to all tii« world,be
fore you «»er ga| e him a syllable of encour
agement 7
''lf laid anj thins of the sort, it was
certainkv most foolish saying."
"I thi.'ht BO then. It Ijas. however,
otc jn.rit-t.hat cf novelty. I resolved to
try it" •
"Capt«n Raj nor!"
" I him tried it."
"Oh! ' lush!"
"And : th FU .'CCM. I think."
N'o an; er, but 1 heard something like
a sob
• i
"Let us have Faith that Right makes Might; and in that Faitfi let us, to the end,dare to do our duty as we understand it"—A. LINCOLN.
" Have I not ?"
There could be no doubt about the sob
bing. »
" Still," pursued Captain Raynor, "I
love you, have loved you, even while! gave
yon pain ; bnt 1 thought that proud spir
it of yours needed conquering."
'• l'nu have been very cruel."
" I'' ■* your good. \ou believe it, and
will forgive me will you not.
It was mean perhaps; but I listended
engerlv'for her answer What do you think
it was? I could scarcely believe my ears,
but it came clear and distinct, and subse
quent events bore it out.
This sweet girl, lovely, accomplished,
anil worthy of some good mail, said totliis
cowardly, lying, heartless, gentlemanly
ruffian, "yes."
Poor Lute l'ina! Had I been a little
Miuivjer. and not quite so much afraid of
a pistol. I would have challenged and shot
Captain llayaor with move pleasure than I
ever ate mj breakfast.
'i wo days before, he had offered himself
to Lou Hartcolo.
on a time a traveler stepped into a stage
coach, lie was a young man starting in
life. He found six
all gray headed and extrpmely aged. The
voungest appeared to have seen at least
< •_htv winters. Our vo«iig traveler, struck
with llie singii'"' mild niul happy aspect
which languished all his fellow passen
determined to ascertain the seoretof
a long life and art of making old age com
fortable; ho addressed the one apparently
the eldest who told him he had always led
a regular and abstemious life, eating veg
etables and drinking water. The young
man was rather daunted at this, inasmuch
as he liked tho good things of Ibis life.—
lie addressed the second, who astonished
him saying he had always eaten roast beef,
and gone to bed regularly fuddled for the
last -eventv years, adding that all depend
ed on regularity. The third had prolong
ed his days by ncversecking or accepting
office; the fourth by resolutely abstaining
from all political or religious controver
sies; and the fifth by going to bed at sun
set and rising at dawn. The sixth was ap
parently much younger than the ofherflve
—his hair was less gray n»d there was
more of it—a placid smile, denoting a per
fectly easy conscience mantled his face;
and his voice was jocund and strong.
They were all surprised to learn that he
was by ton years the oldest man in the
" How is it yon have thus preserved tho
freshness of life ? cxclnimed our young
The old gentleman immediately answer
ed (he young traveler by saying:
'• I have drank water and wine—Thav|(
eaten meat and vegetables—l have drflß
bled in polities and written religtouP
pamphlets—l havo sometimes gone to bod
at midnight; and got up at sunrise and at
noon," he then fixing his eyes intensely
upon the young man, concluded with the
singular remark : "But I always pay
promptly for my newspapers."
£•*; A grazier of Pomerania has com
municated to the school of Medicine, at
Jlcrlin, a method of his for preserving
horned cattle from the contagious typhus
fever, which, a few years ago, caused such
uneasiness to agriculturists in Germany.
It consists in inoculating the animalswith
the saliva of a subject laboring under the
disease by making an incision somewhat
less than an inch iu length on the inner
side of the thigh.
. m —■>
PS.A Dutchman was relating his mar
velous escape from drowning when thir
teen of his companions were lost bythc
upsetting of a boat, and ho alone was
"And how did you escape their fate?"
asked one of bis hearers.
"I tid not cointe pote,"was thelXutch
man's placid answer.
l- • Ttic following mot is relntedof
Longfellow, the {ioet. Young Mr. Long
worth, of Cincinnati, being introduced to
him in Boston. some one pretent remarked
upon the similarity of the first syllable of
of the two names. "Yes," said the poet,
"but in this ease 1 fear I'opc's line will
apply: " Worth makes the man, and want
of -it the frWtw.'" _
OVER-REACIIj NO. —To present horses
fr\>m over-reaching in travelling, a writer
in the Rural Xmc Yorker, says : " Let
the blacksmith make the heel corks ofthe
fore shoes high and the tpe corks low;
and the toe corks of the shoes high
and the heel corks low." TJjis u said to
be an infallible remedy.
tkf" Heroine" isperhaps as peculiars
word as any in our language. The first
two letters of it are male, thejirst three fe
male, the first four a brave man, and the
whole word a brave woman.
K '
Frwtu the New York Mercury.
BT C. I. B.
I today, wher* thooMnda meet—
Tb« KIUI, the atudouA, nnd the g*y—
Ati<! many clad in sorrow'® treed*,
i*;we«H| by we on tliat ' uuy day.
My heart WHM with mie*,
For I. like them. ha»Tfwr*iT vrept
Ov"r lb'* nrjtmy m<>wn«l»»«»fth'*.>
\V ho left mo of all hope bereft.
Thirrp.moved the pale fdr fhrlnhinjr girl,
\\ itn ha*ty itrfM nnd j •yleet eye,
V here laborarnrcely <■ i iu'dlier bread,
1 gave her all I could—anih.
Next, *• Fashion'* ld«d" t«*ik >!«•• place
of |'omiary> fair, fragile, flower;
An !, decked in fabrics rich and rare,
She reigned with beauty'rt 'witching power.
Tin' merchant, dreaming but «>f tain.
Thftft:ttertaMi filled with lu>|hw of fame,
The iHM t vrrapf in mu-ijig» «veet.
All witliamne pur|Mw«- onward came.
And then. ineth<>ught. a little time.
MM tie up <.f uiidie*, h-»pe«, and I oars,
p if»«. and then Ihofe thn-l bing heartri
M ■ iild real uuvexed from worUlly leans.
Far, far removed from Ufe and strife,
The monrnerH' tear* -« a«e t»» ll««w,
And sotißß of gladnoas will aiine
From fitose who struggle here in woe.
These vain, thwe anxious dreiuning one^,
Aduwn Time's stream are harrying fast,
A heavenly watcher o'er them hem Is,
Who'll call hid wouderers home at last.
tkß" It is exceedingly impolite to whis
}>er or laugh in the house uf' God.
JO-.? " When we nay of men that they are
sclf-mado, we do so out of respect to our
Utrg" A verdict rendered ou a man who
died in a state of inebriation, was : " Death
by hanging—around a grogshop."
JN> " The following epigram was written
by Burns,
in so'enteen bunder an' forty-nine,
Patau took htntf tomak a swine,
And cri:d it In a corner:
Ibit wilily he changed his plan.
And shaped it something like a man,
And ca'ed it Andrew Turner.
pair of Government shoes was last week
made in Boston i'nr aNorwcgian, a miuiof
gigantic proportions. The size is IVo. 20,
and the measure aSfollows: heel, Hi inches;
ankle, 12 inches; instep, 12 inches; toes,
11 8-4 inches, lie is a cojor-sergeant in
an artillery regiment of the Army, and is
at present at l'urt Hamilton, Mew York
"IIIsLiST LECIS." are told hy
persons recently from Paris, that the ac
complished and elegant young men sent
out by the Rebel Government as diners
out and to influence opinion in French so
ciety, have been leftijuito withoutmonoy.
Mr. tSlidell refuses to advance any more
of his own funds, and the .Northerners re
fuse to lend.
Draper, of New York, celestial photo
grapher, lias constructed a reflecting tel
escope that magnifies the moon to IS2O
times its size as seen with the naked eye.
Photographs have been taken, represent
ing that body on a scale of seventy miles
to the inch, and showing with great dis
tinctness mountain-ranges, volcanic cra
ters, and streams of lava.
Aissa Outra, about the maddest of the
Mohammedans, have celebrated thobirth
day of their prophet at Algiers in a very
outre, manner. Some burned their tongues
red hot irons, some did the trapeze
HRword-blades, some ate scorpions, some
JPiigcß out their own eyes with pieces of
steel, and some were even so religious as
to swallow the prickly leaves of the cac
"A LITTLE RELISH." —Tho Burgund
ians like large vine-snails. Theyarcscrv
ed, in good houses, seven or eight on ahot
little silver plate, and a silver two-pronged
fork is the instrument with which they arc
pulled out of tho shell, the entrance of
which is covered with a sort of light
1 astry. They feci in the mouth something
liko a piece of beefsteak. Tho plateful
is cno'itrh for one dinner, the snails arc so
big and the meat is so strong.
ia City (Nevada) Bulletin says it is abso
lutely no figure of speech to say that the
streets of that place are paved with silver.
Thousands of tons of rock which, in other
countries, would pay well to extract the
silver from, arc used to level and macada
mize the streets. Rock that will not pass
through the screens -at the quartz-mill, is
carried onto the roads, though some of it,
in many other place.', would be consider
ed rich.
jfcsof The following, upon Vulgar Na
ture*, is admirably true and docs not in
clude a line that could be well spared :
Tendfr-hHii'liwi. strnkf n nettle,
And it ytings you fir yvtir paiu«;
Gr**i> it lik»- a man of m tt io.
And it »>f; a* Mik remains.
Ttetfb# with vi h,.»c nature*;
tb«m kiodiy, thfc.v rrtwj;
Ik ua rough as i.oiuitj;"grater*,
And the n-giMH übt y 3 uu will.
dies before you expend the sum—be it
seventy-five cents or seventy-five dollars—
for a bit of gossamer, with which to en
hance your beauty %y partially conceal
ing it, pause and think. Curtis, a cele
brated sciectific writer on humaa sight,
objects in toto to the practice of wearing
veils, as the continuous endeavors of the
eye to adjueit itself to the Baseless vibrations
of that t<io uncommon article of ladies'
druse, MaiilVs in its serious injury. The
hurtful tendency of the custom, if not felt
immediately, will sooner or later be inad«>
apparent, flvme ph v *jeiaDsgo so far as to
ascribe much of At of
children and adujtutai the fact that their
mothers were constant habit of wear
ing lave veils.
The Food Question in Washington.
The Food Question, writes a Washing
ton correspondent, fumous in all treatment
of national economy as a science, never
had sych interest for a people as has the
Honsa Question for the homeless and
roomies in Washington. Where Con
gress Is to sleep—where eat—where the
ti'hird llpuse is to ref'rcsli itself with slum
ber and food alter its exhausting labors in
legislating for our beloved country —is the
sphinix-riddlc which is the principal to
pie of our conversation. It might be li
belous to tell the prices that the hotels
will charge for board during the approach
ing session. To convey to the Northern
mind a sense of the enormity of rents of
81.200, §1,500, 82,000, S?:!,500, for hou
ses that would shrink out of the society of
the buildings between the Fifth and Hev
eth avenues, above Fourteenth street, in
New York, one would have to employ
photographs of the exterioreaud interiors,
and borrow from Cologne the phrtiseology
descriptive of smells. From forty to one
hundred and twenty dollars a month is
the price of a furnished room for a single
gentleman. We saw a mother with a
babe in her arms, stand aghast, to-day, at
a demand for twenty cents a quart for
milk, principally drawn from the pump.
At 's restaurant, yesterday, the
proprietor, rescuing his reputation from a
charge of extortion, in a flutter of (ler
lnan rage pointed to the cauliflower in his
market book as costing sevftity-flve
cents, to the butter fifty cents, to the beef
stake thirty-five cents, to the eggs thirty
six cents, and so through .the contested
bill of fare. Coal is selling at 811, wood
these details of the ruin of Washington
life, where is the shelter for the people
who inevitably will come to Washington
in Uoccnibor ? No one can tell. Alrea
dy engagements of houses and rooms in
Baltimore have been made. Georgetown
is taken up. The enormous prices of lodg
ings and dwellings all over Washington
indicate the demand for quarters, mid the
demand is not anywhere near its height.
It is estimated that an investment in
Washington of §5,000 in a building, on a
lot worth 81,000, pays, at present routs,
an interest of five hundred per cent.
Some one—a woman, of course—inquires
why, when EVE was manufactured from
a spare rib, a servant wasn't made at the
same time to wait upon her. Somebody
else—a woman we imagine—replies in the
following strain : Becauso AI>AM nevor.
came whining to EVE with a ragged stock
ing to be darned, collar string to be sew
ed on or glove to mend "right away,
quick, now 1" Because he never read the
paper until the sun got dawn behind the.
palm trees, and then stretching himself,
yawned out, " Ain't supper most ready,
my dear?" Not he. lie made the fire
and hung the kettle over it himself, we'll
venture; and pulled the radishes, peeled
the potatoes, and did everything else ho
ought to do. He milked the cows, fed
the chickens, and looked after the pigs
himself. He never brought half a dozen
friends to dinner, when EVE hadn't any
fresh pomegranates and the mango season
was over. lie never stayed out till elev
en o'clock to a ward meeting, hurrahing
for an out-and-out candidate, and then
scolding because pooT EVE was sittiug up
and crying inside „ the gates. He never
played billiards, rolled ten pins, and drove
fiist horses, nor ehoaked EVE with cigar
smoke. lie never loafed around corner
groceries while EVE was rocking little
CAIN'S cradle at home. In short he didn't
think she was especially created for the
purpose of waiting on him, and wasn't
under the impression that it disgraced a
man to lighten a wife's cares a little.—
That's the reason EVE didn't need a hir
ed girl; and with it was tlw reason that
her fair descendant's did.
consisting of three Englishmen and a la
dy, with two guides, endeavored to make
the ascent of tho Alps on the 10th of July
last, hut when they had proceeded some
distance they were prevented hy a storm,
during which they pot ifito the middle of
an electric cloud. Their hair emitted a
hissing, crackling sound as if it had been
under the influence of a powerful electri
cal machine, and over their faces and bo
dies they experienced a pricking, burning
sensation. There were pcais of thunder
heard, at each of which the party received
an electric shock, but no lightening was
seen. The right arm of one of A# par
ly vaa paralyzed for »ev«rit minutes; the
sbow emitted fc'*-*'b# sounds; tne veil
worn by iuc- lady stood straight out, as
ateo did the hair of all of them, wh'A
looted ludicrous that they could not
help bursting into laugh4er. The phe
nomena lasted for about twenty-five min
utes, and no evil off' <ih were felt after
! wai...
Economy in a Family,
There is nothing which goes so far to
wards placing young pooplu beyond the
reach of poverty as economy in tho man
agement of household affairs, • It matters
not whether a man furnishes little or
much for his family, if there is a continu
al leakage in his kitchen or parlor; it
runs away he knows not how, and that
demon Waste erics More! like (he horse
Looclie'ii daughter, until lie that provided
has more to give. It is the husband s
duty to bring into the house; audit isthe
duty of the wife to see that none goes
wrongfully out of it. A man gets a wife
to look after his affairs, and to assist him
in his journey through life, to educate and
prepare their children for a proper situa
tion in life, and not dissipate his property.
The husband's interest should be . tin
wife's care, and her greatest ambition to
carry her no farther than his welfare or
happiness, together with that of her chil
dren ! This should be her w hole aim, and
the theater of her exploits ill the bosom
of her family, where she may do as much
towards making a fortune as he can in the
counting-room or workshop.
It is not the money earned that makes
a man wealthy—it is what ho saves from
his earnings. Self gratification in dress,
or iudulgcucc in appetite, or more com
pany than his purse can contain, arc equ
ally The first adds vanity to
extravagance; the second fastens a doctor's
bill to a long butcher's account; and the
latter brings intemperance—tho worst of
all evils—in its train.
Neugli Goqs,.
What is the difference between a pig
con with one wing and a pigeon with two?
A difference of a-piumu.
Why are K and 1 tho happiest of the
vowels? Heeausc they are always fbtlnd
in heaven blt'ss, while all the rest arc in
in what time of the world's history did
the ocean produce grain? In the time of
the Ceeroops (sea-crops.)
To test tho truth of tho following, tr|
it : Why is a good sermon like a kiss?
liccau'-e all it requires is two heads and
an application!
Speaking of sormnns reminds mo of
ITow many came out of the ark before
him? Three*—for Noah came/"ith.
Whflt is a good motto for a wood-chop
per? llcw an cry.
Another: —
What isa good motto for adressmaker?
"Let her rip."
Still another:—
What should be her epitaph? Let her
It (est) I (n) I' (eaco)J
If the compass was your guide in se
lecting a young lady with magnetic at
tractions, what name would it indicate?—
Miss North (of course.)
What is tho difference between an al
ley gate and an alligator? Tlio one you
bolt, the other bolts you.
What is tho difference between a col
ored sexton and a darning-ne> die? One
is a bigger needle, tho otli-r a nigger
Hero is a couple of integrity (?): —
Why is Powers, ilio sculptor, consider
cd a dishonest man ? Uocausehe chiseled
a poor Greek slave out of Mock of a block
of marble I
Why arc married ladies considered
dishonest? Uecausethey tire! theirskirts
h</nc tlieir bodies, crib their babies and
hoo/c their dresses!
wouM. I think, says a letters from the Ar
my of tlic Cumberland, wonder to see men
lie down in the dusty road, under the full
noon sun of Tennessee and Alabama, and
fall asleep in a minut:. I hare pass
ed hundreds of such sleepers. A dry spot
is a pood mattress; the flap of a blanket
quite a downy pillow. Yon would won
der, I think, to see a whole army corps,
as I have, without a shred of a tent to
bless themselves with, lying anywhere and
everywhere in all-niglit raiu, and not a
growl nor a grumble. I was curious to
see whether the pluck and good nature
were washed out of them, and BO I made
my way out of the snug, dry quarters I
am afhuned to say I ocoajikd, at five in
(he morn in; to - what water had done
with them. Nothing! Each soaked blank
et hatched out 23 jolly a fellow as you wish
to see— mnddy, dripping. half
forth they came, wringing them&jtv-W otl ' ]
as they went, with troop of
" wet down" fo" ruin storm,
pluma-c mast, but heart* trumps
every tiuie. If they swore—and some
did—it was with a laugh; the sleepy five#
wi ill #tirred up; then came the—coffee,
ijAd they \vere a.i. good as new. "Ulood
is thicker than water.''
papers contain a list of thirty-eight rebel
Generals who hare b«ea kMlsd. or died
from wounds received in battle; thirteen
who died from diwatte, ami tbirteea who
_hsve resigned <
Important Medioal Discovery,
A Londou letter says: "A great dis
covery is just now engaging the atten
tion of tha seientitieand medical
Few English names' are more familiar tq
Americans thftn that of Of. Holm Ohii;>*
'man, oil'cc the'le-ufmjj imlittetWW'Tferfc!?
caj Ihm>ks, now editor of llji' Jl' - ■ n Vr,
and always n devotee of scier.-e end medi
cine. lie is well acquainted with many
scientific niul literary Ann •••■, and
many of tjjem, other.Mr l:\-ii.V
--son, have resided in his i,.. ; in
England. This Dr. Chapman lr.-i ber'n
for years engaged in studies and cxi en
ments connected with the nervous system
alone, with sin I) men as Pr. lirown, Se
quard and Claude Bernard, of Paris.—*
(•'or the past year he has lieen proving a
tremendous discovery—nunclv, the cure
of epilepsy, and many disea- hit'h.'i !.i>
deemed incurable. by moans of the.cjti.r-.
ual application of icn and hot water, ia
India rubber Imps, at various paris of tha
spinal cord, acting thus upon the sympa
thetic nerve, and through ii upon tlij
most important and vital regions of the
"Many eminent physicians Juwe ac
companied Dr. Chapman to sen th mar
vels which he had wrought upon patients
wno had long ago despaired of hoall h.—
Some physicians, among otlicrs Dr. Wil
kinson, (though a hinnivpathistj have so
recognized the importance of the discov
ery as to commit to I)r. Chapman's care
some of their patients. Coses are ftt,tes
ted whore a man for six years had tlirco
(its (on nn'average) daily, a girl why had
two from the ages of thirteen tOseveutecn
had been entiruly cured by ico. Justus
wonderful have been the euros of paraly
sis. Many of the worst and most-invet
erate female diseases have yielded to the
new cure. The treatment is as simple as
it is grand. Any one who is troubled by
the pressure of blood on the brain will
find that by holding a bast of ice on the
nape of the neck fur ten minutes, an equa
ble flow of blood can be secured. Thorn
who are troubled with habitual-cold may
find relief by applying ice to the small of
the back in the lumbar region. It is hard
to estimate the importance i.f lb ■ dis. ov
ery, which will ere long be the
side Of that of (Tenner. MT
are already under Dr. Chapman's prac
tice, and, as yet, no one can bring for
ward an instance of failure ''
steam carriage has just been finished in
Philadelphia, and a public taial of it wa<
bad on Tuesday, with very satisfactory re
sults. It is intended for use on public
roads, and is thus described;
An ordinary &ur wlioel carriage has an
upright boiler, of aboijt sixteen inches in
diameter in the rear, with the lever regu
lating the steam and speed extending over
the seat in front. Beneath this boiler i.;
the furnace, which gives no outward ,-ign
of its presence, a..d in tin: rear of th,,
boiler is the small water tank. The stcrnjfc
guage is on a level with the driver, • ml
he can, without inconvenience, ascertain
the amount of steam generated. Tho
whole machine is of two horse power.—
Two persons take their seats in the car
riage, and off it sUrtd, tho driver Kuictipg
with one baud tho front wheels, by means
of a crank, and with the other hand he
can regulate the speed of the engine or
stop the carriage in less time t.'ian a pair
of horses can be brought to a halt. Tha
shaft which propels the carriage commu
nicates with a small crank, and f!;j* m
turn acts upon the larger crank affixed tq
the axel of tho hind wheels. Coal „iH.
cicnt for one day's driving cun be carnal
beneath the seat of tho ci/rri.i gc, and al
though the speed attained i. that of tho
fastest horse, the expense of running the:
carriage is estimated at one cuitper mile
while in operation, with the additional
virtue of not costing anythimnn tha way
I of feed and stabling when not iu usy.
Tuesday, when the cartage w-as exhibited
j the engine carried but fifteen en 4 tr enly
joucds of steam, and ycLk taxed t-'.j
•.owcrs of the hor - r f.-t v*u>,
do not weigh uioic tliag '' 11
pounds. .No diflii J-V; exj e .
turningA* V '-orners or ii l«*. -.tig, and
it* working <!•-. jpott su'qWsH'-
UM! satisfaction.
*ss" A certain green customer, who
waa a stranger to mirroxs, aad who step
ped into the cabin of one of oar ocean
steamers, stopping in front of z. large pier
which he took for a door he said.
"I say ,vl ister when docs thkboat iiai t?"
Getting no reply from the dumb reflec
tion before him he agai» repeated tha..
Inscnsed at the silent fig arc- tie broke
Goto thunder you darnd aa»:-a». »c-e&l
--look as if ytftf knew much any bos,