FRIDAY, APRIL 19, 1968 Hairy Advice: The Strength; By G. W. HENNINGER Professor of Music Even though the Long Hair Cult, on this and other campuses, as well as across tire land, is bound to have its hangers-on, not to, mention those who will join anything, it is still to ( be seriously reckoned with. Some of the kids arc sincere; they have guts, and they may still produce a creative minority of a kind that tottering civilizations periodically need to get back on their feet. What difference does it make that hair, beards, beads, sandals, etc., take the place of words? It is after all a valid protest move ment (Martin Luther would like it), and it is completely legal within the framework of our Constitution. It proves that rugged individu alism is not dead, ev e n though some of their strength has to come from sheer numbers. Now who is to evaluate such a cult? Surely not every Tom, Dick and Hairy. It is a job for ex perts like barb ers and patriots on the one hand, and psychoanal ysts and theolog ians on the other (whatever their po be). The barbers, to begin with, have a valid case. They need customers, and that’s that. But aside from payment for services, they inhairit the hair itself. And since hair is used in mattresses, for brushes and for bomb sights, etc. the fringe benefits are not to be sneezed at. It's like taking a ham to a butch er, asking him to cut off a slice, paying him for the service, and leaving the slice with him. Not bad, from the butcher’s point of view. This is the second article of a new “Fac ulty Forum” series. The Daily Collegian invites all members of the Uni versity faculty to sub mit columns of opinion for publication. Colle gian requests that all articles be triple-spaced and no more than 75 lines in length. ints of disagreement may Rasputin,' the Hairy Monk The patriots have even a stronger case, but they must back it up with their know ledge of history. The Russian Czars, as most historians know, ruled by divine right (they themselves said so), and yet the last one, Nicholas, came to grief. Ironically enough, this was at the hands of another divine: Ras putin, the hairy monk. It seems that the Royal pair had a son (intended hair to the throne) who suffered from hemophilia, a rare blood disease. When the Empress was convinced of the monk’s strange healing powers, he had it made in Letters: Riots, Litterhugs and Sculpture On Civil War Number Two TO THE EDITOR: Having supported the cause of civil rights in America for some five years, both actively and passively, I am somewhat disturbed, to say the least, with the occurrences in our cities in the last few years, specifically dating from the summer of 1965. I read yesterday’s ' Collegian editorial with mixed emotions. It is my belief that the absolute worst thing that could ever happen to the cause of the Negro is the rioting that has taken place. It is fact that a smaller, per centage of Americans favor open housing now than three years ago, when the riots began. The riots must be stopped, or the Negro in America will soon regress to his status of 100 years ago. Even the most radi cal Black Power advocate must admit that he is better off now than he was then. Now then, solutions. A professional police force is sorely needed in the cities of this country, one with superior training and back ground in all aspects of its task. (Already I can hear my detractors cry of a future coup d'etat by my pro force. This is not necessary.) A 22-year-old kid in blue, faced with a 6'3" Negro with a stick, will shoot him. Self-de fense, perhaps, but entirely unnecessary. Look at the list of riot-torn cities in America. Philadelphia and New York are The Arch-Chapter of KEYSTONE SOCIETY wishes to congratulate its New Officers Pres. William Smith V. Pres. Thomas Hudson Treas. Gary Reynolds Sec. Mary Jane Hiney HERLOCHER’S On Sunday Open from 11:30 a.m. B'nai B'rifh Hillel Foundation NOTICE Change of Schedule Friday evening services APRIL 19th 6:30 P.M. (because of the holiday) Faculty Forum Columns Invited Dine at Keep Baby! the Royal household. But he took to politics, and then there was trouble. Even though he was a true patriot, and in his own foolish way worked for the fath erland (or was it Mother Russia?) he made his share of enemies. So, for the good of Rus sia. he had to be disposed of. Assassins under took this noble task. (The word comes from the Moslems, who ate hashish before doing their work in the Crusades.) The killers plied Rasputin with poisoned cakes, then poisoned wine. That failing, they used a rubber club, then bullets. That failing, he was shoved under the ice in the Neva River, and died by drowning! Scriptures Prove It There can be no mystery about the man’s strength. It must have lain in his hair, as can be proved by quoting scripture. But .since some of the blame for the fall of the Czarist regime and the 1917 Revolution devolved on the monk’s head, it would, seem that long haired healers can be as dangerous as their assassins. Imagine this country full of dis putin’ Rasputins! Now take the view of the Freudians and theologians. Freud held that hair-amputation, as well as eye-gouging or blindness, were castration and emasculating symbols. He got his idea from the Oedipus legend and from the story about Samson and Deljah. The im plications are obvious: hang onto your hair actually as well as symbolically. For (he benefit of non-Bible scholars, the story of Sam and Del is told in Judges. Sam (the story goes) had long hair, great strength, and a weakness for Del. She belonged to a tribe that was an enemy of Sam’s, the Phi listines. They hired her to entrap him. and she was resorted to the standard formula: eros. He outsmarted her at first, but she un did him. “See here, Sam”, she says, “I love you. You owe me an explanation of the source of your strength.” “It’s muh hair, Del honey”, he says. So when he is asleep, she de-hairs him. and his strength goes with it. Here is where the Philistines (that breed in every age that is always sticking its nose where it doesn’t belong) took over and blinded Sam. The rest is not important, but the moral is clear, and provides a slogan for our creative minority: Strength Through Hair! Theologians Should Agree Now what about the theologians? It’s ob vious that they are morally obligated to fall in line and give support. After all, they have used the Sam and Del story for centuries, as well as the one about little David bringing Goliath low. The moral is the same: Keep the Strength, Baby. It also suggests that if anything is to be amputated, it is not hair, but some Philistine noses. Anyone disagree? conspicuous in their absence. Both have util ized riot prevention and control courses, and, under fine police leadership, have avoided The Great American Holocaust. Chicago’s Mayor Daley has the right idea, but it is now too late to tell his poorly-trained police to shoot anyone who lights a fire. This will perhst)s be a deterrent, but, as in the case of capital punishment, it is highly doubt ful. Daley has the right idea because he feels this will end the riots. The sentiment is cor rect. Arsonists cannot be tolerated, -and no matter how innocent the 12-year old Negro with the Molotov Cocktail is, he .is more guilty than the six month old baby, be she white or black, who dies in her cradle as a result of his actions. I sadly foresee a return to the posse, Twentieth Century style, this summer it con ditions do not change. I’m afraid carloads of whites with shotguns will add to the toll of death. This will be the barbaric, uneducated answer to a barbaric, uneducated effort to gain equality, and the first step to Civil War 11, Keith Bates '7l Every Litter Bit Hurts TO THE EDITOR: An early spring has turn ed the campus into a bower of loveliness. An aura of misty green covers all growing things. Blossoms from shrub and bulb cast pools of Jump to Moyer's This Week Only THE DAILY COLLEGIAN, UNIVERSITY PARK, PENNSYLVANIA By LAURA WERTHEIMER Collegian Staff Writer God, if there is a God, please bless Professor Laurence H. Lattman. There IS a Professor Lattman. He teaches geomorphology and fun, not necessarily in that order, and yesterday he made the best suggestion of the year about the Undergraduate Student Government problem. We do have a USG problem. Everybody agrees we ought to have USG, but nobody, including the candidates and especially the student body, seems to know what it’s for. Jim Womer promised us almost everything, and Jon Fox was only slightly more reticent. The dullest student realized that neither Fox nor Womer had the slightest possibility of securing off-campus living for women stu dents. And the interesting thing is that, prior to Lattman’s letter to the Collegian yesterday, nobody could pin down the problem. We were muddling. Mostly, people blamed fate. “Student Government has a bad ‘karma’—maybe it will be better in the next life, but now, man, it’s not good , for a whole heck of a lot.” Professor of Education Art for Students' Sake? TO THE EDITOR: Well, here at “Walker University,” it seems that a sum of money fjhdfafig was used to purchased “nothing.” To my amazement I was informed that the so-called si%!§/JStvA piece of abstract art which was transported - "FILL THE FUB” JAMMY Friday, April 19th We the Living 9 -12:30 25c girls free ’til 9:30 Put a Class Ring on Your Finger and ... You r Class Ring at MXTRs> 'Why Not Ask?' Then came Lattman. With the bright burning torch of academic truth-seeking in one hand, the lamp of com mon sense in the other, and one foot on the state of New Jersey (on general principles), he shed light all over the situation and photosynthesized a solution. “Specifically, what are USG’s position and rights in relation to the University Senate and the Administration?” Lattman asked. Who knows? Obviously not the presidential candidates —certainly not the student body. Maybe not even the Ad ministration. But in view of the increasing clamor about “student rights,” it might be a good idea if we all knew. Lei's ask. If the Administration has no concrete defi nition, let’s form a bipartisan committee and write one. If students decide they deserve a wider range of responsi bility than they are granted, they have a specific problem to tackle. But to complain about restrictions when we aren’t even aware of what they are is childish. And as professor Lattman said. “Why not ask?” color in many a nook and corner. Bui there are some students on campus who resent this beauty and are determined to mar it. They cast paper cups, cigarette butts, candy wrappings indiscriminately as if they were rose petals enhancing the landscape. I saw two coeds, efficiently and effectively loil etted and manicured, carelessly drop a used Collegian on the lawn as they gaily walked towards the library. They were sufficiently close to a refuse collector to fall over it. Almost at the same instant a young man happily threw an empty Coke tin into the lilac hedge’ that fronts the new addition to Fattee. Surely a college student should have more sensitivity to his surroundings. An ed ucated soul is one who comprehends some order and purpose in his environment. To thoughtlessly clutter this beautiful spring campus with refuse and waste requires few brains and less creativity. J. D. McAulay For a FREE $4.50 Mug with the order of Where " d sin “ re se ™ c * insur<! y» ur ?f•||Sl lfe| > satisfaction. • jewelers - Opinion Johnson: Speculation on the state of Lyndon Johnson’s image in 1988 is rampant. How will the historians depict this man who has caused so much controversy—and human suffering—in the last five years? The Associated Press tells us that 24 of 40 editors polled at the annual convention of the American Society of Newspaper Editors believe history will dub Johnson a “good president, and, if he succeeds in settling the ; ’ Vietnam war, perhaps even a great one.” Arthur i Schlesinger, Jr ?K ! and Arnold v. Toynbee, two v of ihe greai i historians o f - our time,; would burn , iheir textbooks . if ever Ameri- cans so grossly distorted his- tory. Were it left to Schlesinger and Toynbee, ihe Johnson era would be filed in he same black folder with the Civil War and the Great Depression. In 1963, the future of America looked bright. John Kennedy and his brilliant White House staff had convinced Russia and her allies that we were interested in patching up old animosities. We had faced the realities of the nuclear age and abandoned for all time Joseph Mc- Carthy and John Foster Dulles’ mili tant, irrational anti-Communism. We had finally discarded the messi anic self-righteousness which was the legacy of victory in World War 11. The Kennedy government was the first in our history to realize that the United States can never mold the rest of the world on its model and has no right to try. No one could foresee bullet which blew apart from West Halts to the patio area of Johns ton Dining Hall in East Halls was purchased by the University for $4OO. § I would like to know who was respon- k a sible for the acquisition of such a structure, 5 g and for what reason it was purchased? I & TT | T' l T'i T T T T7'' T} 7 O 3 sure hope that it wasn't erected for the pur- I I § H K I 111 . r~l H r\ 5 pose of enhancing the appearance of East S -&■ JL-JX V> V_>4JL IL/lv ►vJ’ g Halls. With ohjects like that in East, we don't need the fresh smell of cow manure as we walk through East during these early spring mornings ■ Since its founding, the “masterpiece” has not only been verbally grossed-out but hast also been physically attacked (although un-i successfully). | Therefore, in the future I feel that the* students of East Halls should have more, power in determining what should be done! 1 to improve (or ruin) the appearance of their dorm areas. i a Mug in Your Hand quality mer- Hoax By MIKE SERRILL Collegian Editorial Editor SERR3LL Rich Sokolowski '7O Who’ll help make them “the super seventies"? The electric company people You better believe it! For as living goes more electric, our tomorrows will have unlimited horizons. At your investor-owned electric ligfi and power company, those tomorrows started yesterday. In fact, every year we share in many hundreds of research projects to help make electric service ever more useful, dependable and easy on your budget. Working to give you the best electric service today, the electric company people are working to make your future better, too. West Penn Power Part of the Allegheny Power System The Greatest in All History John F. Kennedy's head would also shat ter ihe tranquility of the world. No one could foresee, as Lyndon Johnson and his menagerie of Byrds filed into the White House for the first time, that this was a bloody landmark in American history. Johnson and his military advisers have dragged us into a war 6,000 miles from our shores—a war which cannot be won, even with our awesome military machine. Johnson’s war has temporarily shat tered all. hope for East-West Detente. It has antagonized the Soviet Union, con vinced them of our imperialistic designs and thus launched a new phase in the conventional and nuclear arms race, bringing us perilously close to ther monuclear war with Vienam’s fright ened neighbor, China. Johnson's domestic programs have been well-conceived, well designed—and subordinated to the war effort. While our cities lay in smoldering ruins, our country on the verge of racial civil war, Johnson has continued to pour $3O bil lion a year down the Asian rathole. Johnson has finally realized the futility and danger of his course in Southeast Asia and has reluctantly de cided to de-escalate. But the damage has been done. If the war was settled tomor row, the United States would have to pour billions into Vietnam in order to rebuild the 1 country our soldiers have destroyed. . And if the war stopped tomorrow, the resultant economic dislocation would probably cause a major recession. Lyndon Johnson is a misguided man. He has more thoroughly discredited the office of the President of the United States than any other leader in our his tory. If ever he is called great by the American people, someone will have successfully executed one of the greatest hoaxes of all time. that the rifle the back of On Sunday Open from 11:30 a.m. Din© a! PAGE THREE
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