PAGE TWO
you won't believe this
even when you read - it
One Lilco, one two . . daintily
bouncing her football down the
mall, All-American Josephine
Tepsic flipped the beads of per
spiration from her carefully pow 7
dered nose.
Catching a bead I tossed it back
at her and as her slight frame
shivered under the icy deluge, I
panted, "Miss Tepsic, I idolize the
figure you cut on the gridiron.
"How do' you keep i' . . . . err
000ps, pardons me. f mean to
.what do you attribute your phe
nomenal success in the pigskin
world?"
Eimiitting an etifectionate "oink,"
Josephine revealed her sacred
secret.
"It's due entirely to the pin
ning-cuip exercises I do each
nigilt, she explained. "A pack
age of bobby pins, a bottle of hair
set and a curry come—use these
and you, too, may become a great
athlete!"
Overwhelmed with my scoop I
ened to "Wreck Hall" ,where
wrc , :tling champ Samantha Har
ry was having a work-out with
her manager, Watt A. Wolfe,
"Wanna clinch?" Samantha
(11V1 ritably suggested. Throwing
over her manager in anticipation
of new prey, "Sammie" crept
slowly toward me.
I ogled. Slim velvety arms
punctuated here and there with
gle:ming biceps, streaming blond
hair revealed the delicate curve
of a cauliflower ear.
".Ahh, Sammie darling," I
br eat h ed. "What makes you
clinch so?"
"Now you're -gettin' poisonal,
Bin," S'la.un an tha melodiously
grunted. "But if ya let me prac
tice on ya a few times, I'll give
ya the lowdown!"
(ElitOr's note: Mere will be a
two minute pause here for
pre yer.)
Two hours later.
Thstatically inhaling smelling
salts, I once more asked Sammie
the secret of her success.
"Before eath woikout I imbibe
ti,VO glasses of warm cow juice—
ya know chalk soup? Oh yes. and
Then ya better tell all those poi
sons who wanner be athletes. rub
their paws wiith Joigans each
night = makes 'em the kinda
hands the other guy'll get bitched
up with—then ya give 'im the
ole one two."
Thanking Sammie for her in
valmble tiips I next sped to the
;field where slim, lovely Juanita
Nolan , was triming -around with
•
her Lacrosse colleagues.
"What gives you this unlimited
energy and skill?" I asked the
,charrp.
"000000, you .tweiat bug
wondahful man, oo!". she gurgled
M. answer. "Tell my public it's
(what I diwink eviwy night at the
iiwatahnity houses.'.!
"You don't need..a matwic calla
the. - h," she added softly.
"You thweet ill thing," I liithep,
"Din' anythling Saturd
WH O. GOS H, DING IT,
STARTED THIS ? ? ?
Backetib'all stareete
The basketball courts were my
next stop and can you guess who
was there? Waldo, Hatkevicb, of
course!
"Walda, my love," I implored,
!peering around bar Icompact.
"Wihat gives you your amazing
long reach?"
Thoughtfully acplying lipstick
to her chryanthenturn bud lips,
she answered, "Well, sir, I have
to .sorta reach for my toes every
night when I give myself a pedi
cure. That's very strenuous. And
then, too, trying 'to catch the
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122 Allen Street
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We feature the Fam
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ters" in a complete
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waitresses' attention every
,eve
ning in' the Corner Room is
gradually extending my reach."
Excellent, direct answers, I de
aided as I idly watched Weida
help Helen Fry through the holes
in the basketball net.
"Helen, where did you learn the
.fancy footwork?" I shouted.
The great gymnaft flung her
leg at me. I promptly caupht it,
stroked its black coils of hair and
pocketed it for future inspection,
ES she declared:
"Thar hain't rilly a th'ing to
Mt," "Jist stand in. a nylon line
fer a few hours, or If yer pertic
urly anxious hie yourself to Ath
hall for lunch. I can Show yer
how ter git through the line in,
five minutes."
It's a Date
Thrilled, I sighed, "It's a date,'
then eating the delidacy I next
o.; , :proached Boxer Joan Ben Han.
ShF.lkirig her anaemic white fist
she was furiously °biasing her
shadow around the gym.
I repeated the now trite ques
tion. Joan sighed, exhaling Tabu.
Inhaling Tabu, I gave with a
right, then with a letit, then an
upipenout and. 'finally quelled
Joan's shadow.
"You are too kind, sir," Joan
politely remonstrated, meanwhile
stroking my whin with her 10-
pound glove.
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kw SR .TO „jI.I4TIOS 111A0p ,UyItt.OUS
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a t ilt uro.TT ,cipirm padout.2 aa.aulls
mound , iii3put.ls.ino s 4 a2aitoD atilt
3foot 2C3topioct s aux 2tunnoathi,
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;no S - - - tuts,
oS `pandia." ueof •uonsanio
atilt Inpvi ane2 'IIOO.AVS
SiMi;al
each - .sorority will • now -be "used
for,Lawiew - type of rruhing) party.
Say the sisters,-"We. turned..down
the freshmen women—now we're
going to see what the men are
like."
"PENN STATE. FOREVER"
Now and later you'll cherish your jewelry
with the college seal. See our assortment of •
• Bracelets
• Keys • • ,
• Sword Pins
• Barettes .
• Lockets •
cRABTREE3 .
T 3-3 E COLLEGIAN
s6uHru SODU
-nouue efism
New coed dating regulations
have been announced by Fluores
cent Patrner, npseident of WSGA.
The hew rules were compiled as
the result of articles published re
cently in newspapers and maga
zines attacking coed dating con
duct.
Coeds returning to dorm via
roommates unlocking side doors
will not return later than 3:00
a.m.
Coeds entertaining servicemen
or recentyl , discharged men from
out-of-town will be given milgintly
WSGA added a memoranda
that coeds have a reputatien for
hospitality to be maintained).
Coeds hiving in Watts Hail where
1000 girls entertain beaux in an
oversized dheese box halve been
given .special permission to en
tertain, anywhere on the 'limit Moo:-
if two lights are on in the huald
ing.
Coeds Pnindiing any fraternity
lounge fwith less than two lights
:burning are asked-lo report all
occupants of the. room . immed
iately to the fraternity treasurer.
fines will (be - collected (by frater
nities needing new couldhes. Oth
erwise the delinquents are to.. be
severely reprimandd.
The new regulations go , into ef
fect the second Monday this week.
saa . a.a
greekettes
quit rushing
Camps sororities 'announced
the resuts of their recent.. period
of intensive rushing, stating that
there will the nn pledges this se
mester.
"We felt that the , current crop
of freshman girls definitely does
not come up to our customary
Standard, and will not be a credit
to Penn State sororities," declar
ed Sits Bagner, president of Dam-
Hell Council. She refused to
state, however, whether the fact
that the rushees- as a body had.
decided that it was more demo
cratic to remain independent had ,
influenced the council's decision.
A (member of the freshman
class declared that she had
thought quite seriously of pedg
ing Alpha Zeta Mu or Xi Gam
ma Delta, but dhanged her mind
Since the AZlVrt mouse was too f9r
from her eight o'clock classes and
the Xi Gam pin did not look
well with her flaming red hair.
She added that a few - hoUrs' sob
er reflection persuaded her not to
go sorority, since, with all .her
class remaining independent, she
would some day be the only
sorority woman-on campus.
Sorority- actives,. worn out after
their futile efforts, voted' to take
a week-off-from classes to recup
erate from the effects of the
rushing 'period. The .date prev
iously set aside for initiation. in
hen ,ityleJ
Good. Morning Ladies. I say ladies, for I know that all Penn
State coeds are ladies. It is spring and what do all girls- think of
when spring comes? That's right . . . clothes of course. Skiiis
will be longer this year. No more of this knee-attraction business.
To capture interest this year, you will have to depend on those .de
lightfully, feminine blouses with the receding necklines. For that
pretty-as-a-picture look, try a bow at the side of your hair,, or better
still, try a beau at your side. With nylons back on the, market the
average woman can discard those imitation stockings she got out. of
a bottle all during the war• . but if the temperature • goes up,
chances are Lizzy Harden will not have to go out of business. (For
explanation, read ear of front page.) And the well shod foot will be.
two inches off tht burning pavement this summer ... platform soles,
you know. • -
This year jewelry once again steps into the spotlight. With the
increase in the number of men on most campuses in America, the
fashion will be more jewelry, girls. No longer must you content
yourselves with sporting one fraternity pin apiece. Appropriate
several, one for each change of costume. This makes for variety in
color schemes. Another helpful hint to you wondering coeds . . .
you know those little gold and silver keys which so many of the MEN
around campus wear? Well, they make the cutest earrings. Of
course, you must get two that match, but that's easy. Just . ask the
fellow from whom you get the first one who else is in that particular
"club."
And flowers will definitely be worn this summer. Don't bother
to buy a hat for Easter. Just tell that present fiance that hats are.
"out" and that you must have floWers for your hair. ` However if,You:- . .
really want to be "right," you won't wear, just any cad flower,
you'll insist on. orchids'to Match all your costumes, not the' ordirrary..•: ,
common violet shade, but rather brawn ones, white ones, yellow
and
, greeni ones. You'll• be surprised what a difference such, a little
thing will make in your wholee appearance . . . and in yotir love life....
And to the girl of the ex=Gl,, I have this parting bit .4:::0f advice...,
If your "man" was in the air corps;be j sure to wear those subtle shades
of pink and green; if "he" . wasa swabby, pick shades of blue, prefer- -•
ably the darker shades, and for the men who fought thewar on their
feet, dress in that new and different shade of beige. Take mY.:
advice, girls, dress in the colors I have prescribed. Your men are.'
used to these colors, and they'll_ love seeing you in them. And so
until next year at this time, this is your spring fashion expert bidding ••,'
you all a fond farewell.
Virzi ler Vorto./9,
Pt's a smart man who avoidS be
ing a fall guy by taking a tumble
to, himself.
College-bred" •sometimes means
just a four-year loaf.
The Easter halts now showing
indicate that in a lot of families
the women are going to be wear-_
ing the plants.
A doctor advises that a frown
exercises 50 muiscles in the lace.
Moral: Take less - exereVse!
A will of his own helps a young
man, says lan educator. And that of
a ..rich grandfather doesn't hurt
any.
What do you want in a lipstick?
'Smooth-as-sotin texture? Creamy
consistency? Colors that stay gloi
ouilytrue? This lipstick I
or p as e m 41
has an these quolities—plus the add
,delight of delicate Duchess of Yo
fragrance and a distinctive aqu
tenomelled metal case-_-_-$l.OO plus to
MdANAHAN'S DRUG STORE
S. , ALLEN STREET-STATE COLLEGE
Another. time for a motorist ,to
worry aboa ;losing control of his
car is when he's a .couple 7 of in.
stailiments behind.
If you're wdlifing Ito .admit you're
all wrong when you are, you're all
night.
Gaigs are what' people who are
always pulllting •'themm need.
A soft shoulder has upset many
a one-armed driver,
Some people who get 'the breaks
need 'em Ito keep from slipping •
baokwards.
The OPA tined a Neivv. York
dealer $79,01 for overcharging on
nylons. For once we 'can get more
kick out of a single sock than a.
pair of stodkings.
The housing situation do no . :"
'4Pk,
MONDAY, APRIL 1, 1946
by . lord tt o
'Bongo Bright
Cordinol
Red Red
Holly Berri
Nally Pink
Fuchsto Roiti
Raspberry
Fuchsia Tulip
Block Cherry'