warm weather. 'F I remember right, I’d got 'bout ’s fur south 's Alabamma, ’nd was asettin’ by the kitchen stove ter git real good 'nd warm. 'Twas awful hot thet day, ’nd after a spell I got up ter take off my coat. After another spell I thought I'd take off my collar ’nd necktie—the’ bein' no ladies present—but the consumed things stuck ’nd I commenced ayankin’, ’nd ahaulin’ on the pesky things, ’nd thrashin’ raound like all persessed, when I knocked a kittle uv hot, bilin’ water onter me. “With thet I made a jump, ’nd thet jump woke me up, ’nd I warn’t daown in Alabamma, not by a darn sight, but daown in Maine with the bed-clothes all aburnin’ uparaound me. Naow I warn’t ready ter begin the ‘everlastin’ burnin’ ’ at jest thet minit, ’nd I lit aout uv thet bed pretty lively ye’d belive. “Waal, we got the fire aout after a time, but bein’ some what excited ’nd het up over it, jest dressed me, ’nd set daown dost by the kitchen stove ’nd waited fertile fust train back ter Bostin’, ’nd ye’d better believe I aiut goin’ ter no such cold place agin. ” “Burn ye much?” queried a sympathetic listener. “Naw,” drawled Mr. Green, “’nd thet’s the funniest part uv th’ hull thing. Fire up above me, ’nd below me, 'nd all around me, ’nd never teched me.” “Sort uv a mirac’lous escape, ivctrn’l it, Mr. Green?” queried the same man. “Waal, Id’ know’s I'd say that," was the reply, and from the light in Mr. Green’s eye we knew that his victim had “bit.” “I d’kno'w's I’d say that, egzactly. Ye see,” said he adopting a confidential tone and leaning toward his ques tioner, “Ye see I sort ov fig'gered it aout that it must ’a ben because I was tew Green tew .burn. ” And the sympathetic listener sneaked quietly out am id the “Haw Haw’s” of the rest of the company, while Abner set tled back again to his cud-chewing without so much as a
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