In Lighter Vein. bald-headed man awoke with a start >m his weekly devotional slumbers; ;n he sank on his knees and fervently prayed, vord, send me down the back numbers.” MY CHOICE. Now-a-days things go by doubles; Rowboats, sofas, the canoe, Hammocks, dog-carts, all such things, And bicycles are built for two. But for these if you have praises, Waste them on some other man. My devotion I pledge to the Muff run on the partner plan. THE RETORT CHEMICAL. Break, break, break, O beakers and bottles and flasks, In the weary grind Of matter and mind That marks all our chemical tasks. For it’s twenty-five dollars for “Lab.” And a “fiver ” or “ tenner ” to boot, For filters and tubes To buy the young “Rubes” In a “confidence,” “bunco” -like loot, The boys come and go like beggars, By the spot where the " Prof ” holds fort, And try to give back What they’ve borrowed, alack! But this is the pointed retort. That flask is speckled and spotted With grams and grams of dirt, And there’s H 2 O In that bulb I know Your retort beyond hope is hurt. So take them back to your stands, sirs, And polish and wash through and through, With HNO„ In plenty you see, And then I’ll attend to you. Then they grumble and scowl and mutter, In a way beyond all compare, At this merciless dame Of an antique fame, Who ever sits sphinx-like there. — Exchange. — Exchange.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers