ERMS OF T11B " AMEIHCAX.
)SEPH EI3ELY. 5 r.orais-ron..
II. B. JHJSSRB, Editor.
:t in CtntrTAiliyTin the rear of H. Mas-
ter'i Store.
HE" AMEfolDAN" Isubii's'hed every Statur
al TWO DOLLARS per annum to bs
! half yearly in advance. No paper discontin
till ttr arrearage art paid.
o subscription received for a less period than
norths. All communications or letters on
neu relating to the ofTice, to insure attention,
be POST f All).
r.
H. THOMPSON,
Fn1iionalIc
JOOT AND S1IOK MAKKIt,
MaKin Stkit, Kvnevav,
IHANKFITL fr pat favor, begt Icav loin
form h a friend and the public generally, that
hat juft returned from the city wiih new and
linnnliln lasts, an I a full sssnrtmcttt of fifth!
red, Bronte, Black Kid, and all other kinds
Morocco for Gentlemen, Lailie and llhiMrrn's
ir; and he assures all wbo may favor him wfth
ir custom, that they may rely upon having theft
ik done in the nnwl sulistantial and fashionable
nner, and ai very low price,
-le all".! has full assortment of low piired work,
Ttd hy himiwlf. which ho will aell lower than
r off-red in Ibi place, vix i
n edioee, aalnwa 1 1,00
ira 8lout Boots, " 8.00
kI Luce Boon for Women, " I, on
omeri'a Slips, " 60
il.lren's 8hoe, 55
Sole Leather, Morocco. Ac, fot sale low.
August 22d. 1840. pl8lf
Boot & Shoe
i ST ABLISHIY1ENT.
DANIEL druckemii.t.kr.
: hit Old Ettablishmrnt. tit Market Street,
Sunhury,
(OPPOSITB THE RKD I.IOK ItOTKt)
ETURNS his thank for past favors ami re
speclfully informs hia friend and the putdie
iierally, that he continue to manufacture to or
r, in the neatest and latent style,
CHEAP ROOTS AM) SHOES,
arranted of the hest material, and made hy the
ot efprilrnced workmen. He also keeps on
ind a general assortment of fashionable Boots for
nil' men, together with a larne stork of uhinn
ile eentli-men". hoys', U.li.V and child en's Shoes,
I of which hiave been mde under hi own imrrw
ate tnsction, and are of the bent material and
oikinjio'liip, which h' will cell 1iw for cash.
In a hlilion to the love, he hna just received
oin 1'hilaJ. Iihia a large and extenxive supply of
oois, Shoes, &c. of all descriptions, which he alo
Tors for ch. eheaier than ever lielore off red in
tin plaoe. Me respectfully invites hi old rnsto
icrs, and others, lo call aud ctaniiwe for them
Ives. Jiepairing done with neatness and despatch,
ttonlaary, August 15th, 1846.
PIANOS.
rllE SUBSCRIBER has been appointed scent,
for tle..f til.NRM) MCVKK'S CEL
SHKATED PREMIUM R3E WOOl PI
l.N'OS, at this place. These Pianos have a pitta,
aassi ie and IwbumAiI exterior tini-h and, for depth
nfl weeTfiew ttTtone, and eleg ince of workman
hip, are not urierd by any in the (Jniicd Slates.
I'tie following ia a reeommendation from Cant
irts, a elcbrted (terfb'iner, and himself e man
fruiter; A CARD.
HiTmn had the plea-ure of trying the excel-
nt I'i-iio Forlea manfactured hy Mr. Meyrv, and
xhiblted at the Jjt exhibiiion of the Fr-nklm tn
ilwle, X feel It Kie r Its? low wterit of the mstcer
,o ileclare that these instruments are stia iual'
wnl in some respects even superior, o all the Pi
mo Fortes, I saw at the rapiuls of Europe, and
Juring sojourn oftwoyesrs at Pris.
'Phes' PianiTs wiM he so'd at tins inanufactuprr's
Irxwest Philadelphia prire, rT tit aotwrning lower.
YVrss see eeuestcd in call and examine fot
ihemsrlve, t Ihe tenfilertce of the subacrihrr.
Kunbury, May 17, IH45. H. 0. MASSE R.
C'ounterrcIterf
DEATH BLOW.
rptie pul4rtWiWpleae eAisorwi that no Bfandrelb
Pill r genuine, unlesa lha bok baa three la
bel upon it, (the top, the sMe and the bottom)
carli contsiiiinc a f ic-similt signature nf my hand-
anting, thM If. BaiT, M. D. Tlreae Nt.
nel-aia engraved on ateel, Ivautinilly derHgtretl,
and done at an expense of over $2,000. Therefore
it wsHbeasen thst the only thing nrcewjary to pro
cure the medicine in it purity, M to observe thesa
lalels.
Remember the top, the side, and the bottom.
1 ne following respective iieraon are dulv auibttl
ted, J hnld
csBTinCATrs or agency
For the sale of rVrtrnifm' Irjt6f Unitmai
ntr.
North umber land count i Milton Mickey &
CnamUeilin. runbury H. B. Masaer. M'Ewena-
Mlhs Ireland & Meixelt. orthumtatlanl Wm
roeayth. Georgetown J. A J. Wall.
Union County : New Berlin Bogar & Win'
ler. Belinsgrove (leorga Gundrum. Mitldlo-
Iwrg Isaac Smith. Beaveriown - David Hublcr.
Ad:imiburg Wig, J. May. Mifttuisburg Mensch
At Rsv Haillelon Daniel Long. Freeburg
O. & F. G. Moyer. Iwi.burg Wall A Oreen.
I'olumbia county t Danville R, U. Reynolda
A. Co. Berwiek Shuman A Rittrnhouae. Cau
lawissa C, G. BroUu. Bloomsburg John R,
Moyer, Jersey Town !evt Blsel. Washington
Robt. McUay. Llmeotte Balli fc MrNneh
Observe that each A sent ha an Kngraved Ci-r
tificaleof Agency, containing a reureaentation ol
Vi IIRANDRETH'8 Manufacuty at Sing fin.
ami upon which will also be sern exact copies of
the new label ntiW used ufhtn the Brntt(trrtk fill
Dxea.
Philadelphia, offlc No. Notth fuh atreet.
B. BHANDRETH.M.D
June 21th U43.
CaCorffc Ji WenVcl",
feOPB MAHBR V UXP CHANDbSH
No. 1 3 North Water Street, I'hiladelphim.
VIAH conaiantly on band, a general assort
If I men! of Cordage. Seine Twlllel. At., viti
TarM Hope. Fishing Roue, While Rope, Manil
la Itonea. l ow Lines for Csnal Boat. Also, a
complete assortment of Seine Twioea, Ac such la
Hemp Shad and Herring Twine, Best Patent Gill
Net Twine. Cotton Shad and Hctring Twine, Shoe
Thread, Ac. A. AUo, Bed Cord. Plough Line.
H altera. Traces, Cotton and Linen Carpel Chain,
A ait of which he ill dispose of on ronbl
terms.
Philadelphia, November 13, lfl.4t.-ly.
m
OLASSES Tb liiat quality Sugar iloua
Molaases, onlv 121 cant par ausrl; lo,a
superb n article of yellow Molasara for biking, on
y 12) cents per quait for sals at I he vlore ot
June 13, IMS. HEMiY MAtER
SUMUEY AMEMCAN.
, AND SH AMOKIN JOUliN AL
Absoluta acquieacenca in the decision of lh
From the Union.
Oar Heart, Dear Girl. Br avllte ymn still.
so!o roa tn votrnTssns.
An ttuMteWt Variation tf Yankee Dotdle.
Br itonar jossxlyn.
We're laf awny in foreign land
RespontiV lo ntir ttmntry' calf,
A little but a gallant hand
Fair Freedom' ohs, and brother all,
Onr pleasant hornet, nur kin and rriemls,
At thought of these mr boiom thrill ;
While memory her magi? Iendi-
Onr heart, (er girls, are with you si ill.
New forms and face! meet nt here,
Unlike the loved onet left behind;
Strange voices fall upon our ear,
But none with tone so sweet and kind.
The dark-eyed beauty strives in vain
Affections lonely void to fill ;
For tnu w only wear the chain
Our hearts, dear girls, are with you still.
No holyday pursuit it our
The burning tun, (he chilling Jew,
The battle where the death-storm showers,
We cheerful suffer all Tor you 1
Weatk rm guerdon but your praise;
Go where we may, and come what will,
Forever, at in bygone days,
Our hearts, dear girlt, are with you still.
Camp near Monterey, Mexieo, Dee. I, 184C.
The Drankard't ttesnlv.
Air .fn not fondly thine num.
Go, go, thou that entlaveat me,
Now, now, thy power is o'er ;
Long, long, have I obeyed thee,
Now I'll not drink any mora.
No, no, no, no,
No, I'll not drink any more.
Thou, thou bringeit me ever,
Deep, deep sorrow and pain;
Then, then, from thee I'll aever,
Now I'll not serve thee again,
No, no, no, no,
No, Tit trot serve thee a;ain.
Rum, Rum, thou bast bereft me,
Home, friends, pleasures so sweet J
Now, now, forever t've left thee,
Thoa and I never shall meet.
No, no, no, no,
Thou and I never shall meet.
Joys, joys, bright at the morning,
Now, now on me will pour ;
Hope, hope sweetly is dawning,
Now I'll not drink any more.
No, no, no, no,
No I'll not drink any more.
A Priaa Conundrum,
A concert waa given in Philadelphia on
Thursday evening the 1 1th ult, at which a
Piano, valued at 250, was awarded to the au
thor of the best conundrum handed in. The
following is the conundrum to which the major
ity of the committee awarded the prlr.e under
protest, at we understand, ot Mr. Du Sollc,
(one of the committee,) who contended that it
waa deficient in merit t
jiXI. Why is the character of the prize
piano estimated like the character uf the great
and good man 1
Because we judge of its grandeur by iti ac
tion it goodness by its tone,
In lieu of the above, the following i the one
which the dissgreeing member 4 the cotfcmilte
contended waa the 'best end mot original,' vim
425. Why dors an individual who gets
deeply, darkly, beautifully Mire" enact the part
of a religious hypocrite t
Boca use he wears the livery nf Heaven to
verve the detil in !
The following conundrums read upon the
orcrfslnn, were entitled to credit for peculiar
excellence.
008. Why is Santa Anna, in asserting that
the United Slates Army and people were row.
srd and barbarian, like a harp lruck by light
Because he is blotted lyre I
694. Why was Jonah reckoned among the
Upper len thousand I'
Because he Wit (he bosotn entnpanioo of
biff flab.
9G9. Why should t man with one cent ex
port a lafge qiianiity of breadstuff 1
because he isthepner of fen milU.
Wa Why should Prince Albert feel je.
lout of one of our American geiiemla
Became Taylor haa his arms around Victoria.
tin 1 as a
woo vny is me man that wins the prize
piano like a man eakieg hia wile (or a dessert
alter dinner!
Answer. Because he says I'll take that pie,
Anna.
Why is en set uf homicide like Great tin
ts in 1
Because it is known over the world as .
$inalion (a-sasy-nufinn.)
fVJO.-Why is th beauty of the price piano
like Charles Dickens!
Answer Because it lie) in rie Vfei.'
rnsjbrlty, the vital principle of Republic, from which
fitinbury, Northumberland Co.
TUB VAKKBK ARtt TMK ikCKER.
T MF.RRM.t, e. VOt' NO,
PaWy Concealed within Ihe borders of k
wood, which sklrta s scene where I prairie
"Stretched in boumllcn beauty lies,"
is situated a charming little Cottage, nestled
in shade and afC)iajnn brnealh the folltjro o
ovor shadowing boughs. On the Piaisa in
front of this dwelling, a Venerable sticker named
Gordon waa tested, one summer afternoon,
building dreams of thrill is he surveyed his
plantation, enamelled in heavy crops ripening
into plenty. Now as our sweetest dreams are
fleetest and quickest to close, it is not strange
that hi, although pleasant, were soon termin
ated hy some one shouting
Hallo, old dad.
Hallo yourself, and diskivcr how it feel,'
he retorted, and turning simultaneously with
hi reply, his eye foil upon a young man, a
stranger to him leaning on the yard-fence.
Excuse me, sard the stranger ; 'may be you
mnughl le so clever at to tell a chap who owns
tint rrw wheat field tip aside the timber, won't
you!'
Wall, ! will; I own it !
Dw say 1' raid the stranger, lint ainl it
mighty cute that you allow four legged and aieli
critters to be in it.
But I don't,' said tWdnn.
1 seen a hoes in it though, ts 1 kum along,'
remarked the stranger, dryly.
A hwe in my wheat ' exclaimed the Suc
ker. 'Zangs and lightning ! Here Blucherl
Santa Anna, h e r e h-e-r-e.'
His call had the tflect to bring rotth tw
dogs, one a hound, with hi legs half as long ss
an eaftcrn school-master's, the other a bull,
the peculiar qnirk of whtune under jaw might
lead you to mistrust that he was over fond of
what the knowing ones call the 'grab game.'
Attended with these, he trotted off: 'hot haste,'
ihe doga wagging their tails aa their oW master
wagged his tongue urging them to pursue.
The ynunir etrangcr after wagging his chin
a little awry and indulging in a light langh
that made him look suspiciously wsggish, walk
ed to the cottage door and then, without cere
mony, into ihe parlor. Here finding himself
alone, he commenced a survey of the apartment,
Bfore he had much leisure, however, either
to observe or admire the taste and elegance
combined in every thing around him, he was
entranced by a gush of rich, wild melody, suc
ceeded by the sound of Ihe light footsteps, and
instantly flitted a creature of beauty and come
liness into his presence. Oh ! that fair rosy-
cheeked damsel, the very personification of
bli-hnce. She was startled, though, when her
soft blue eyes encountered the stranger ; and
waa hactily withdrawing, in doing which, she
chanced to cast anothrr glance- her counten
ance changed from fright to gladness she ut
tered the name Henry Ijpslie, and then ran
not out of the door, but smack into the young
stranger's arm. What an extraordinary act
in-fa'lu a-tion. She let him let him kiss her,
too; and listened to hia impassioned Ituguage,
why what did ihe girl mean 1 Their conver
sation will, perhaps, suffice to explain.
Clarissa, said the stranger, 'Clarissa, my
beautiful idol, I have come to claim you tot my
own.'
O Henry, I fesrthatottr hopes will never
chthgn to realities. I loVe you Very, Very
much ; but my father dislikes you merely be
cause you area Yankee lawyer. He is obsti
nate and will not consent and the rosy flush
fled the young lady's cheek.
Do not fear, Clarissa said Henry Leslie.
'I Can and will remove his prejudice, I know
how to work on a farm, and he does not know
tin. I will hire to him under an assumed name
and by the merit of honest worth and virtue win
a place in hi allections.'
Their hopes excited, and consequently their
anxieties lulled by the rcawinablenefs of this
plan, the two seated themselves on thn soft
and enjoyed those bright sngel-pluined delights
with which a reciprocal love inspires Voting
hearts. When Gordon returht, however, he
found the stranger alone. Claris having deem
ed it prudent to retire at the sound of her fa
thei's footstep.
Gordon was glad that the stranger had tar
riedhe wished to give him a pealing, tor he'd
sesrehrd the field all oVer end feund no horse,
' "Now don't blame me, old Man,' said the Yan
kee, fur surer than my name is Dick Q'lirk, I
seen a hots, a dead one, in thst're veiy wheat
ss I kum slung.'
Oh ! but Old Gordon waxed wroth at thua
learning that he had been cent to drive a mere
skeleton from his field yet the Yahkee con
trived to calm his ruffled feelings, snd hire him
self to the Sucker to Mew-thing,' closing the
bsrgain with the impartial agreement, that
they might hocus'pocus' one another aa much
as they pleased ; whereupon Gordon tickled bis
inner-self with the conceit, that he would
make our hero suflcr for all the wroog he bad
endnred from Yankee trickery, even from the
time nf his buying e clock from a Yankee ped
lar, which he said kept time backwards, down
Ihwe'ls
no appeal but to f&rt, the vital principle
Pa. Saturday, Teb. 30, 194 1.
to the period when the New York pettifogger
wished to marry Clariwta.
Respecting Henry Leslie, he had been in
early manhood, an enterprising young farmer,
endowed with a bnd and beanliful rlnniaiih
But being moreover girted wp.h an ce"nt
smack of intellectual powers, he had been in
duced to forsake the natural avocation foi one.
perhaps better befitting Ms tmbitinn, tasrn and
ability.law In the VilUgo where he studied
and practiced, he becaoio acquainted with
Cla risse Gordon, who had accompanied sn aunt
from the west, with the tStsign of comphAing
her education at nne ot those meritorious insti-
tut inns lor lemalc instruction, with which the
eartern States abound. They loved. The aunt
wrote tn her brother, old Gordon, mlitiilng Mb
consent for Cltrrissa to marry, explaining af
fairs, &e. Gordon answered, stating that he
should ever negative his daughter's wifh to
mnrry any Yankee, who, it appeared, was too
Ur.y In work, snd hence had re sot ted to petti
fogging. He also instructed Clarissa to come
home immediately, under the protection of an
elderly lady and gentleman, friends nf hi-, then
about In return from the east. Clarirte wa
obedient wept obeyed her lather.
Love, ww ell know, te litas wine, a mocift,
and sometime prostrates fts Victim, by myste
rious intoxications. Something of this kind be
W Leslie. His noble upheaving tiT desire
hia earnest ambition, were staid. The exe t
ment tif business nf practical life became
tthormlrs. And withm the lepf. -rjf twelve
months, we find him as presented to the resder,
disguised under sn assumed name, language,
and demeanor, entering upon a plan o win lils
lady lore, the sweat or his brow. Herein
was centered the ordeal testing the purity of
his affection and proving it as pure snd clear
snd undaunted as the waters t a mountain
spring. He was willing to labor for her like
the patriarch on record, to toil, to endure the
wrong and rack of bone ami einew. Gradually
did he win his way into the old man's esteem
On good deeds be laid Ihe base and building up
ol a good character. By his steady application
and his practical skill snd ability lo labor, he
substantiated a reputation tor industry,' snd
finm experience combined with book knowledge
superiority in the pursuits of sgricullute, In
the latter, Gordon was particularly indebted to
him, he acknowledged his worth ; the plants
tibn, ton, expressed it legibly. Nevertheless, I
do not know what would have been Ihe result,
had not a circumstance occurred propitious to
the lover. It wis thus :
Gordon Was Very unjustly prosecuted hy
neighbor. Arriving at Ihe court at the time
summoned, (it was a Justice's trial) he found
every body there whom he wished to see but
his own lawyer. He would nnl be beat for
hundred dollars ; yet he knew he could not
conduct the suit successfully turns If.
Toa man like him, independent lo obstinacy,
such a situation, without alternative, was mr
tiffing in the extreme. As the Justine ws
declaring that the cso mutt proceed forthwith.
Dick Quirk, alias Ijeslir, whipped lo Gordon:
May be, seein as how your lawyer aiut cum.
you'll let me try your aide' I've did sich thing
afore.' .
Gordon opened his eyes Wide, snd stared at
hum
'I don't think yon need hang idf, for t'lt pay
the cost and damage and give you a year's work
if I don't beat,1
tiordnn complied partly Irtim despair, firtly
beCattse he never knew Dick to fail, in anything
he undertook.
five minutes elapsed; snd ltlie was in his
element. He had rich sport that aftcrhune.
The cornering up of some half a doeen upi
onus witnesses f the putting to flight of half as
many ha'.f-lledged lawyers, the kslohlshment
which the audience evinced, as, throwing off
hia assumed style of speaking he merged into a
chaste, clear and rapid stream of eloquence.
The plain exposition tif f.tcts and of the law
woven into one glorious irresUtible argument,
finally resulting in a verdict fuvorahle In his
client, were both amusement and profit to L- s-
llS;
Gordon, who during the whnlo affair had sat
with his mouth so wide i'pen that you could
have tcssed t potato e-jftcirhtly Infife for it
breakfast down his throat, without hi knowing
it said when they weiu tilling home
Dick, if ou tin a Yankee, I don't tare; you
are an all-jo-fired gotid feller.'
'So I am,' said l-eslio, laiigliinr ; 'indeed
whether yuu take me irt the Meld ot labor, '.lie
court-room, or in any otbei place of business
you please, do you know any man suuetior lo
me hereabouts.'
'Ho 1 donV ,
Now what do you think ul uy poverty V a
ked Ilie.
I think yoti will exchange it for something
better, as you did your blamed Tsuntoo la-dsy,
answered Gordon,
Do you consider poverty a disgrace V couti
nueJ Leslie.
Well row, 1 shouldn't think 1 did .'
and immaxliki parent of despotism, J aktsii
Vol YaftN 2ttaTThol) Hi, 34
Well sir, en id Lslie, stammering a tittle,
inasmuch aa yotf seem to harbor rro aetitiment
concerning me but what fsvnt me, I will be so
bold at to inform yon there is a mutual attach-
iwrt existing cvtwccvt your daughter and my
self, snd we solicit your consent to our mar
risge.'
Gordon opened his ryes and mouth again wi
der tTin ever.
She is yours hy jingo said the father after a
short pause. 'All I care shout it ia that ahe
will havo to take such a conarned ttgty natne,
uirk Unnk Uniik It vrtinds solike a sick
gnbler'k eotioqoy, but I poe we tan petition
the Legitdature and have it altered.
Clarisse,' said Gord.m in the evening, "Cla-
tynirk has told me yon ioVed on nother,
en I have given Von to him entitelv. t am
glad, girl, that ymi hsV this time madethohie
nf k man who Vnows how to pettifog, jam tip.
without b'drig too lsf.y to work on a fatmv
ClnriS laughed 1n her sleeve.
Henry iValie snd Clarisse tordy wefn tnar-
h?d.
After the depsrtvtve of tire wedding gtiestson
that ewer t occasion, even after the ceremony
vhich launched them into the Inextricable,
yclrped Tnatrmvmy, rVen after the cake.tnnfic,
tea, kissing, wine, dancing, and coffee, alter all
were finished, after all their fricwSa were gone,
Clarisse fbtind hertell between her husband and
her father, She turned her eyee to the hitler
and eaid beseechingly.
Fether, will you forgive Us V
forgive youl for whai child !'
Why you know I-l-loVod aV4 wished lo
wed Henry Leslie, my first flame, but you would
not content in our sllisnce
And recollect, too, perhaps said llie young
husband, 'that when I firat tame litre, the mu
tual agreement was thai we were to hocus po
eus each etheV as much as we pleased
Well, what I waa about lo ray tc-ulinUed
the bride, 'is that Dick Quirk and Henry Les
lie are the same person.
'Sags and lightning V exclaimed Gordon
springing lo his feet ; but he paused and sur
veyed both the culprits attentively and Ihen
continued without passion 'What an old fool
I have been to fancy that my girl didn I know
enough to choose a fit ai.d proper huabahd. For
give you ! yea I will, and bless you into the bar
gain. Come to think of it, ! am glad it has
happened so, for we shan't have tn petition the
General Assembly in order lo get rid of that
blamed sick gobbler scthlcqiiifrng Quirk
Quirk Quirk. Go to beJ children.'
laTEacaTiNO RenNieVRmko Wasntftctoft.
The Montreal Courier saya: There ia an
interesting fact connected With the English
4(Vh regiment, which has just arriVcd in this
city in relieve the OOtli RifleS) bwmd for Hali
fax. Thi-re his been lor upwsrd of a century
a fti!cmaeW lodge in the 46th in this lodge
George Washington was httde a mason, while
the regiment tvaa stationed in the colonies, be
fore Ihe outbreak of Ihe ReVnldtionary war.
The regit.tr r tf this lodge contains Washing
ton's signature in hi own hand writing, and it
still pnnr-ssr the II. hie which it made use of
when this great man waa initiated. The Chest,
containing the books and regalia of the lodge,
was captured by the Americans during tbe war
and taken to Ws-hington, but when it was dis
covered What it Contained, it Wat immediately
rent b ck. tt underwent a similar fate some
ycais utter, beitijj taken by the Prenc.h at St
Lucia. It waa then c tried to Paris, and its
contents being exsmim-rit waa immediately re
lumed lo the regiment by the Frcacb authori
ties. We believe a detail of these facts with
the dates and lull particular! w Id be found in
ihe Freemason's Msgaiine of a few years back.
A CuookfciJ RIVrr. A Metathoree corres
pondent of sn Indiana ?aper, in giving a de
scription of the Rio Grande riveri eaya: Ima
gine four nf the crnohedest things in the world,
tlieti imagine four mole twice ss crooked, and
then fancy In yourself a large riVer THRtk
TiMrs ss crooked ss all iheso put together, and
ynu haVe a fsittt IHea r)f the crooked dipwi;ion
. . .... - .A..
of this iluilgmy crooned river. 1 here is no
drill ih it from tho fact that tt is so crooked thst
timber can't find it way far enough down lo
lodge two e'.tt ks together but few snakes, be
cause it is not straight etimigh lo swim in, shd
Ihe fih sre all in the whirlpools in the bchtlsi be
cause they can't find Iheir tVay out. llifda fre
quently silempl In fly across the river, and light
on the same side they start from, being decei
ved by li e different rrnoks! Indeed, you may
be deceived whrh you think vou see scrose it,
snd sonic of the b'hliyi eajr it ia so difhrd twis
ting there isn't but Out side lo it.
A Good PAaamasss. We bate beard thai
previous to a tfcfcebt Well contested battle, a
young Volunteer officer inked leave of a cer',,;,,
celebrated Major General lo go aud his fa
thet on hi death-bed.
Go said bia command-r- tmiiing sarcasti
cally ; You honor y j,thsr and mother, il
your ,'vyi m.y i(iflg in ,hl ,JW
-- w
rntens op AnmtTiAiKG.
I siua insertion, . .
do do .
do J,, . . .
Kvety subsequent inserthn, . .
0 0
0 T5
1 OS)
e sr.
1 eariV Advertisement, i . L.ir
column, 1 1 8, three square, f t a j two squat, f
on i square, ,!. Half-yearly t one column, $18 t
half column, $t t three sqi-tres, f , two uarea.
5i nne iquaie, S3 no,
Ader1if menl Ml without direction aa tn the
length nf time tltey are to he published, will be
continued until ordered out, and charged accord
Ittgly.
(jKixten lints or less make a square.
Portrait of Havel Ca,
. v cow J.
Now you that was cnt out for a man, but so
Villaincmly spoiled in making up, t il attsnd to
your esse. For what end did you lortt open the
world's door, and ruth in uncalled, like a man
thased by a mad bull t What gttod do you x-
pett ts bestow epon ywit fellow men t Some
ttsefal invention, some heroic act, some great
iteovery or even one solitary remark? No!
Tbote that loolt fer anything good from you, Will
be jrtit at badly fooled tt the man who eangbt a
skunk and thought it wat a kitten ; or the wo
man who made greeeaef gun powder tea. You
know where the neatett, tightest pantt, with the.
strongest straps tan be rot 'on tic,' but you don't
Virew where the useful lectnrs will be delivered:
yon know th color of a Vett, bet never studied
the gorgeoat baet of the rainbow, unless it was
to Wish for a piece to make a cravat of; yott
know how a fool feels in full dress, bot yon don't
Vrrow how ft man feels when he eats the bread
earned by the sweat of bia brow ; ynu know how
a TnonVey looks, for you tee one every day twen
ty timet in yenr landlady's looking glass, but
you don't know how a man feels after doing a
gffod action, you don't go where that tight it to
be teen. Oh! yon wasp-waitted, catutb-mouthed
baboon-shouldered, calliper-legged, goots-eyed,
heeV-Taeed, be-whiakered drone in the world's
bee biVed. What are you good for ! Nothing
but to cheat your tailor, neatly to litp by rttte a
line from some milk and cider poetaster, tenti
mentally talk love, eat oystera and act the fool
shamefully. I sav dnet your motht know you're
out ? Iam afraid ynn have no moth 'r nor nevrr
bad.
Yon are of no more me in thia world then A
time piece in a beaver dam, or e m-tras in a hog
pen. You rill no larger spare in this world's eye
than th toenail of a mosquetoe in a market
bouse-, or 4 stump-tailed dog in all out doort i
)rU are at little thought f as the fellow who
knocked his grandmother' last tooth down her
threat : and as for your braint, ten thousand
t'uch could he preserved in a drop of brandy, and
have aa much tea room at a tad-pol In Lake
Superior.
And It for your ideal, you bave but one. and
that ia stamped on your leaden akull an inch
deep that tailors and females were mad to be
gulled by you, and that you think decent people
enVy your appearance. Poor, useless tobacco
worm ! You kre a decided I v hard cat I
Qrkttk DtcistoN. Various and amusing sre
the stories told of Justices of the Pesce, popu
larly called &utrei, who as they temper mercy
ith the strict rigor of the law, give judgments
of the most ludicrous cast Our Baltimore ma
gistrates, in times gone by, have given some
strange decisions, but they are fairly eclipsed by
the following, which we find chronicled by a
correspondent of a Cincinnati paper. ,fciaM
more Clipper.
I knew a 'Squire' in Pennsylvania before
Whom a certain Henry Bmnner, who did not a
bound much in worldly goods, wat brought fur
a breach of the p ac. The rs.e was a flsjr-
nnl one, and the evideuce was clear and expli
cit. Well, Henry,' ea id the Squire, 'It UhV wort
while to bear your defence, de case is so blain,
unt Vcn you hat de monhy, I should fine you
dree dollars, aber I knows you tint got do luat
red cent, put as te ends of justice inusht not be
defeated, lie blantsfi shall pay my costs unt I
will bay de konstablcra costs mineself, and you,
Henry, are tien-by sentenced to shop wood four
days oo thine lathi ss your fine."
The Indians On the Tonewsndo reservation,
New Yorki had given great trouble to all the
neighboring magistrates With their petty and
vexatious law-iuits, and great complaints on the
subject being insde known to De Witt Clinton,
then Governor of the State, he appointed one of
tbe tribe to act as Jut-lice of the Peace in all ct
ses to which Indians were parties. Some six
months after) the magistrate who bad been mo.t
incommoded by these Indian suils, met hie bro
ther squire, snd very naturally asked him how
be got along in bis new employment and whe
ther there waa as much business in that line aa
formerly.
''Spo-e not said the Indian, 'only two cares
yet.'
Only two cases in six month replied hie
neighbor in surprise J ' Met us hear how you ma
naged the last
Well said the new squire, 'Tom Silverhee'e
sued Nicholas Obale for assault and battery. It
was a clear case, en I directed the plaintiff1
sbobld haVe thirty lathea, and tbe defendant fif
ty lashee too, and the witcee five lashes a-
piece( and order.-d the constable to pay thC'
I have had no ct--- r. '
Rather Oui A uu:, ,-.:-.if : IihI
p'acc in one, of the Fk'huii pr v ucea a shot!
lime:,oce. A rrenchtnsii who, in htd
ione with Ns p.. I eon to Russia, and Was long
since believed dead, suddenly MuMed. Hie
Wife hai mteantim been married to threw t-lher
husband, and had jual buried the last of them,
when her first relumed from Russia, and ah
began married lite once more tnew, and under
hspfiy a ispices.