ERMS OF T11B " AMEIHCAX. )SEPH EI3ELY. 5 r.orais-ron.. II. B. JHJSSRB, Editor. :t in CtntrTAiliyTin the rear of H. Mas- ter'i Store. HE" AMEfolDAN" Isubii's'hed every Statur al TWO DOLLARS per annum to bs ! half yearly in advance. No paper discontin till ttr arrearage art paid. o subscription received for a less period than norths. All communications or letters on neu relating to the ofTice, to insure attention, be POST f All). r. H. THOMPSON, Fn1iionalIc JOOT AND S1IOK MAKKIt, MaKin Stkit, Kvnevav, IHANKFITL fr pat favor, begt Icav loin form h a friend and the public generally, that hat juft returned from the city wiih new and linnnliln lasts, an I a full sssnrtmcttt of fifth! red, Bronte, Black Kid, and all other kinds Morocco for Gentlemen, Lailie and llhiMrrn's ir; and he assures all wbo may favor him wfth ir custom, that they may rely upon having theft ik done in the nnwl sulistantial and fashionable nner, and ai very low price, -le all".! has full assortment of low piired work, Ttd hy himiwlf. which ho will aell lower than r off-red in Ibi place, vix i n edioee, aalnwa 1 1,00 ira 8lout Boots, " 8.00 kI Luce Boon for Women, " I, on omeri'a Slips, " 60 il.lren's 8hoe, 55 Sole Leather, Morocco. Ac, fot sale low. August 22d. 1840. pl8lf Boot & Shoe i ST ABLISHIY1ENT. DANIEL druckemii.t.kr. : hit Old Ettablishmrnt. tit Market Street, Sunhury, (OPPOSITB THE RKD I.IOK ItOTKt) ETURNS his thank for past favors ami re speclfully informs hia friend and the putdie iierally, that he continue to manufacture to or r, in the neatest and latent style, CHEAP ROOTS AM) SHOES, arranted of the hest material, and made hy the ot efprilrnced workmen. He also keeps on ind a general assortment of fashionable Boots for nil' men, together with a larne stork of uhinn ile eentli-men". hoys', U.li.V and child en's Shoes, I of which hiave been mde under hi own imrrw ate tnsction, and are of the bent material and oikinjio'liip, which h' will cell 1iw for cash. In a hlilion to the love, he hna just received oin 1'hilaJ. Iihia a large and extenxive supply of oois, Shoes, &c. of all descriptions, which he alo Tors for ch. eheaier than ever lielore off red in tin plaoe. Me respectfully invites hi old rnsto icrs, and others, lo call aud ctaniiwe for them Ives. Jiepairing done with neatness and despatch, ttonlaary, August 15th, 1846. PIANOS. rllE SUBSCRIBER has been appointed scent, for tle..f til.NRM) MCVKK'S CEL SHKATED PREMIUM R3E WOOl PI l.N'OS, at this place. These Pianos have a pitta, aassi ie and IwbumAiI exterior tini-h and, for depth nfl weeTfiew ttTtone, and eleg ince of workman hip, are not urierd by any in the (Jniicd Slates. I'tie following ia a reeommendation from Cant irts, a elcbrted (terfb'iner, and himself e man fruiter; A CARD. HiTmn had the plea-ure of trying the excel- nt I'i-iio Forlea manfactured hy Mr. Meyrv, and xhiblted at the Jjt exhibiiion of the Fr-nklm tn ilwle, X feel It Kie r Its? low wterit of the mstcer ,o ileclare that these instruments are stia iual' wnl in some respects even superior, o all the Pi mo Fortes, I saw at the rapiuls of Europe, and Juring sojourn oftwoyesrs at Pris. 'Phes' PianiTs wiM he so'd at tins inanufactuprr's Irxwest Philadelphia prire, rT tit aotwrning lower. YVrss see eeuestcd in call and examine fot ihemsrlve, t Ihe tenfilertce of the subacrihrr. Kunbury, May 17, IH45. H. 0. MASSE R. C'ounterrcIterf DEATH BLOW. rptie pul4rtWiWpleae eAisorwi that no Bfandrelb Pill r genuine, unlesa lha bok baa three la bel upon it, (the top, the sMe and the bottom) carli contsiiiinc a f ic-similt signature nf my hand- anting, thM If. BaiT, M. D. Tlreae Nt. nel-aia engraved on ateel, Ivautinilly derHgtretl, and done at an expense of over $2,000. Therefore it wsHbeasen thst the only thing nrcewjary to pro cure the medicine in it purity, M to observe thesa lalels. Remember the top, the side, and the bottom. 1 ne following respective iieraon are dulv auibttl ted, J hnld csBTinCATrs or agency For the sale of rVrtrnifm' Irjt6f Unitmai ntr. North umber land count i Milton Mickey & CnamUeilin. runbury H. B. Masaer. M'Ewena- Mlhs Ireland & Meixelt. orthumtatlanl Wm roeayth. Georgetown J. A J. Wall. Union County : New Berlin Bogar & Win' ler. Belinsgrove (leorga Gundrum. Mitldlo- Iwrg Isaac Smith. Beaveriown - David Hublcr. Ad:imiburg Wig, J. May. Mifttuisburg Mensch At Rsv Haillelon Daniel Long. Freeburg O. & F. G. Moyer. Iwi.burg Wall A Oreen. I'olumbia county t Danville R, U. Reynolda A. Co. Berwiek Shuman A Rittrnhouae. Cau lawissa C, G. BroUu. Bloomsburg John R, Moyer, Jersey Town !evt Blsel. Washington Robt. McUay. Llmeotte Balli fc MrNneh Observe that each A sent ha an Kngraved Ci-r tificaleof Agency, containing a reureaentation ol Vi IIRANDRETH'8 Manufacuty at Sing fin. ami upon which will also be sern exact copies of the new label ntiW used ufhtn the Brntt(trrtk fill Dxea. Philadelphia, offlc No. Notth fuh atreet. B. BHANDRETH.M.D June 21th U43. CaCorffc Ji WenVcl", feOPB MAHBR V UXP CHANDbSH No. 1 3 North Water Street, I'hiladelphim. VIAH conaiantly on band, a general assort If I men! of Cordage. Seine Twlllel. At., viti TarM Hope. Fishing Roue, While Rope, Manil la Itonea. l ow Lines for Csnal Boat. Also, a complete assortment of Seine Twioea, Ac such la Hemp Shad and Herring Twine, Best Patent Gill Net Twine. Cotton Shad and Hctring Twine, Shoe Thread, Ac. A. AUo, Bed Cord. Plough Line. H altera. Traces, Cotton and Linen Carpel Chain, A ait of which he ill dispose of on ronbl terms. Philadelphia, November 13, lfl.4t.-ly. m OLASSES Tb liiat quality Sugar iloua Molaases, onlv 121 cant par ausrl; lo,a superb n article of yellow Molasara for biking, on y 12) cents per quait for sals at I he vlore ot June 13, IMS. HEMiY MAtER SUMUEY AMEMCAN. , AND SH AMOKIN JOUliN AL Absoluta acquieacenca in the decision of lh From the Union. Oar Heart, Dear Girl. Br avllte ymn still. so!o roa tn votrnTssns. An ttuMteWt Variation tf Yankee Dotdle. Br itonar jossxlyn. We're laf awny in foreign land RespontiV lo ntir ttmntry' calf, A little but a gallant hand Fair Freedom' ohs, and brother all, Onr pleasant hornet, nur kin and rriemls, At thought of these mr boiom thrill ; While memory her magi? Iendi- Onr heart, (er girls, are with you si ill. New forms and face! meet nt here, Unlike the loved onet left behind; Strange voices fall upon our ear, But none with tone so sweet and kind. The dark-eyed beauty strives in vain Affections lonely void to fill ; For tnu w only wear the chain Our hearts, dear girls, are with you still. No holyday pursuit it our The burning tun, (he chilling Jew, The battle where the death-storm showers, We cheerful suffer all Tor you 1 Weatk rm guerdon but your praise; Go where we may, and come what will, Forever, at in bygone days, Our hearts, dear girlt, are with you still. Camp near Monterey, Mexieo, Dee. I, 184C. The Drankard't ttesnlv. Air .fn not fondly thine num. Go, go, thou that entlaveat me, Now, now, thy power is o'er ; Long, long, have I obeyed thee, Now I'll not drink any mora. No, no, no, no, No, I'll not drink any more. Thou, thou bringeit me ever, Deep, deep sorrow and pain; Then, then, from thee I'll aever, Now I'll not serve thee again, No, no, no, no, No, Tit trot serve thee a;ain. Rum, Rum, thou bast bereft me, Home, friends, pleasures so sweet J Now, now, forever t've left thee, Thoa and I never shall meet. No, no, no, no, Thou and I never shall meet. Joys, joys, bright at the morning, Now, now on me will pour ; Hope, hope sweetly is dawning, Now I'll not drink any more. No, no, no, no, No I'll not drink any more. A Priaa Conundrum, A concert waa given in Philadelphia on Thursday evening the 1 1th ult, at which a Piano, valued at 250, was awarded to the au thor of the best conundrum handed in. The following is the conundrum to which the major ity of the committee awarded the prlr.e under protest, at we understand, ot Mr. Du Sollc, (one of the committee,) who contended that it waa deficient in merit t jiXI. Why is the character of the prize piano estimated like the character uf the great and good man 1 Because we judge of its grandeur by iti ac tion it goodness by its tone, In lieu of the above, the following i the one which the dissgreeing member 4 the cotfcmilte contended waa the 'best end mot original,' vim 425. Why dors an individual who gets deeply, darkly, beautifully Mire" enact the part of a religious hypocrite t Boca use he wears the livery nf Heaven to verve the detil in ! The following conundrums read upon the orcrfslnn, were entitled to credit for peculiar excellence. 008. Why is Santa Anna, in asserting that the United Slates Army and people were row. srd and barbarian, like a harp lruck by light Because he is blotted lyre I 694. Why was Jonah reckoned among the Upper len thousand I' Because he Wit (he bosotn entnpanioo of biff flab. 9G9. Why should t man with one cent ex port a lafge qiianiity of breadstuff 1 because he isthepner of fen milU. Wa Why should Prince Albert feel je. lout of one of our American geiiemla Became Taylor haa his arms around Victoria. tin 1 as a woo vny is me man that wins the prize piano like a man eakieg hia wile (or a dessert alter dinner! Answer. Because he says I'll take that pie, Anna. Why is en set uf homicide like Great tin ts in 1 Because it is known over the world as . $inalion (a-sasy-nufinn.) fVJO.-Why is th beauty of the price piano like Charles Dickens! Answer Because it lie) in rie Vfei.' rnsjbrlty, the vital principle of Republic, from which fitinbury, Northumberland Co. TUB VAKKBK ARtt TMK ikCKER. T MF.RRM.t, e. VOt' NO, PaWy Concealed within Ihe borders of k wood, which sklrta s scene where I prairie "Stretched in boumllcn beauty lies," is situated a charming little Cottage, nestled in shade and afC)iajnn brnealh the folltjro o ovor shadowing boughs. On the Piaisa in front of this dwelling, a Venerable sticker named Gordon waa tested, one summer afternoon, building dreams of thrill is he surveyed his plantation, enamelled in heavy crops ripening into plenty. Now as our sweetest dreams are fleetest and quickest to close, it is not strange that hi, although pleasant, were soon termin ated hy some one shouting Hallo, old dad. Hallo yourself, and diskivcr how it feel,' he retorted, and turning simultaneously with hi reply, his eye foil upon a young man, a stranger to him leaning on the yard-fence. Excuse me, sard the stranger ; 'may be you mnughl le so clever at to tell a chap who owns tint rrw wheat field tip aside the timber, won't you!' Wall, ! will; I own it ! Dw say 1' raid the stranger, lint ainl it mighty cute that you allow four legged and aieli critters to be in it. But I don't,' said tWdnn. 1 seen a hoes in it though, ts 1 kum along,' remarked the stranger, dryly. A hwe in my wheat ' exclaimed the Suc ker. 'Zangs and lightning ! Here Blucherl Santa Anna, h e r e h-e-r-e.' His call had the tflect to bring rotth tw dogs, one a hound, with hi legs half as long ss an eaftcrn school-master's, the other a bull, the peculiar qnirk of whtune under jaw might lead you to mistrust that he was over fond of what the knowing ones call the 'grab game.' Attended with these, he trotted off: 'hot haste,' ihe doga wagging their tails aa their oW master wagged his tongue urging them to pursue. The ynunir etrangcr after wagging his chin a little awry and indulging in a light langh that made him look suspiciously wsggish, walk ed to the cottage door and then, without cere mony, into ihe parlor. Here finding himself alone, he commenced a survey of the apartment, Bfore he had much leisure, however, either to observe or admire the taste and elegance combined in every thing around him, he was entranced by a gush of rich, wild melody, suc ceeded by the sound of Ihe light footsteps, and instantly flitted a creature of beauty and come liness into his presence. Oh ! that fair rosy- cheeked damsel, the very personification of bli-hnce. She was startled, though, when her soft blue eyes encountered the stranger ; and waa hactily withdrawing, in doing which, she chanced to cast anothrr glance- her counten ance changed from fright to gladness she ut tered the name Henry Ijpslie, and then ran not out of the door, but smack into the young stranger's arm. What an extraordinary act in-fa'lu a-tion. She let him let him kiss her, too; and listened to hia impassioned Ituguage, why what did ihe girl mean 1 Their conver sation will, perhaps, suffice to explain. Clarissa, said the stranger, 'Clarissa, my beautiful idol, I have come to claim you tot my own.' O Henry, I fesrthatottr hopes will never chthgn to realities. I loVe you Very, Very much ; but my father dislikes you merely be cause you area Yankee lawyer. He is obsti nate and will not consent and the rosy flush fled the young lady's cheek. Do not fear, Clarissa said Henry Leslie. 'I Can and will remove his prejudice, I know how to work on a farm, and he does not know tin. I will hire to him under an assumed name and by the merit of honest worth and virtue win a place in hi allections.' Their hopes excited, and consequently their anxieties lulled by the rcawinablenefs of this plan, the two seated themselves on thn soft and enjoyed those bright sngel-pluined delights with which a reciprocal love inspires Voting hearts. When Gordon returht, however, he found the stranger alone. Claris having deem ed it prudent to retire at the sound of her fa thei's footstep. Gordon was glad that the stranger had tar riedhe wished to give him a pealing, tor he'd sesrehrd the field all oVer end feund no horse, ' "Now don't blame me, old Man,' said the Yan kee, fur surer than my name is Dick Q'lirk, I seen a hots, a dead one, in thst're veiy wheat ss I kum slung.' Oh ! but Old Gordon waxed wroth at thua learning that he had been cent to drive a mere skeleton from his field yet the Yahkee con trived to calm his ruffled feelings, snd hire him self to the Sucker to Mew-thing,' closing the bsrgain with the impartial agreement, that they might hocus'pocus' one another aa much as they pleased ; whereupon Gordon tickled bis inner-self with the conceit, that he would make our hero suflcr for all the wroog he bad endnred from Yankee trickery, even from the time nf his buying e clock from a Yankee ped lar, which he said kept time backwards, down Ihwe'ls no appeal but to f&rt, the vital principle Pa. Saturday, Teb. 30, 194 1. to the period when the New York pettifogger wished to marry Clariwta. Respecting Henry Leslie, he had been in early manhood, an enterprising young farmer, endowed with a bnd and beanliful rlnniaiih But being moreover girted wp.h an ce"nt smack of intellectual powers, he had been in duced to forsake the natural avocation foi one. perhaps better befitting Ms tmbitinn, tasrn and ability.law In the VilUgo where he studied and practiced, he becaoio acquainted with Cla risse Gordon, who had accompanied sn aunt from the west, with the tStsign of comphAing her education at nne ot those meritorious insti- tut inns lor lemalc instruction, with which the eartern States abound. They loved. The aunt wrote tn her brother, old Gordon, mlitiilng Mb consent for Cltrrissa to marry, explaining af fairs, &e. Gordon answered, stating that he should ever negative his daughter's wifh to mnrry any Yankee, who, it appeared, was too Ur.y In work, snd hence had re sot ted to petti fogging. He also instructed Clarissa to come home immediately, under the protection of an elderly lady and gentleman, friends nf hi-, then about In return from the east. Clarirte wa obedient wept obeyed her lather. Love, ww ell know, te litas wine, a mocift, and sometime prostrates fts Victim, by myste rious intoxications. Something of this kind be W Leslie. His noble upheaving tiT desire hia earnest ambition, were staid. The exe t ment tif business nf practical life became tthormlrs. And withm the lepf. -rjf twelve months, we find him as presented to the resder, disguised under sn assumed name, language, and demeanor, entering upon a plan o win lils lady lore, the sweat or his brow. Herein was centered the ordeal testing the purity of his affection and proving it as pure snd clear snd undaunted as the waters t a mountain spring. He was willing to labor for her like the patriarch on record, to toil, to endure the wrong and rack of bone ami einew. Gradually did he win his way into the old man's esteem On good deeds be laid Ihe base and building up ol a good character. By his steady application and his practical skill snd ability lo labor, he substantiated a reputation tor industry,' snd finm experience combined with book knowledge superiority in the pursuits of sgricullute, In the latter, Gordon was particularly indebted to him, he acknowledged his worth ; the plants tibn, ton, expressed it legibly. Nevertheless, I do not know what would have been Ihe result, had not a circumstance occurred propitious to the lover. It wis thus : Gordon Was Very unjustly prosecuted hy neighbor. Arriving at Ihe court at the time summoned, (it was a Justice's trial) he found every body there whom he wished to see but his own lawyer. He would nnl be beat for hundred dollars ; yet he knew he could not conduct the suit successfully turns If. Toa man like him, independent lo obstinacy, such a situation, without alternative, was mr tiffing in the extreme. As the Justine ws declaring that the cso mutt proceed forthwith. Dick Quirk, alias Ijeslir, whipped lo Gordon: May be, seein as how your lawyer aiut cum. you'll let me try your aide' I've did sich thing afore.' . Gordon opened his eyes Wide, snd stared at hum 'I don't think yon need hang idf, for t'lt pay the cost and damage and give you a year's work if I don't beat,1 tiordnn complied partly Irtim despair, firtly beCattse he never knew Dick to fail, in anything he undertook. five minutes elapsed; snd ltlie was in his element. He had rich sport that aftcrhune. The cornering up of some half a doeen upi onus witnesses f the putting to flight of half as many ha'.f-lledged lawyers, the kslohlshment which the audience evinced, as, throwing off hia assumed style of speaking he merged into a chaste, clear and rapid stream of eloquence. The plain exposition tif f.tcts and of the law woven into one glorious irresUtible argument, finally resulting in a verdict fuvorahle In his client, were both amusement and profit to L- s- llS; Gordon, who during the whnlo affair had sat with his mouth so wide i'pen that you could have tcssed t potato e-jftcirhtly Infife for it breakfast down his throat, without hi knowing it said when they weiu tilling home Dick, if ou tin a Yankee, I don't tare; you are an all-jo-fired gotid feller.' 'So I am,' said l-eslio, laiigliinr ; 'indeed whether yuu take me irt the Meld ot labor, '.lie court-room, or in any otbei place of business you please, do you know any man suuetior lo me hereabouts.' 'Ho 1 donV , Now what do you think ul uy poverty V a ked Ilie. I think yoti will exchange it for something better, as you did your blamed Tsuntoo la-dsy, answered Gordon, Do you consider poverty a disgrace V couti nueJ Leslie. Well row, 1 shouldn't think 1 did .' and immaxliki parent of despotism, J aktsii Vol YaftN 2ttaTThol) Hi, 34 Well sir, en id Lslie, stammering a tittle, inasmuch aa yotf seem to harbor rro aetitiment concerning me but what fsvnt me, I will be so bold at to inform yon there is a mutual attach- iwrt existing cvtwccvt your daughter and my self, snd we solicit your consent to our mar risge.' Gordon opened his ryes and mouth again wi der tTin ever. She is yours hy jingo said the father after a short pause. 'All I care shout it ia that ahe will havo to take such a conarned ttgty natne, uirk Unnk Uniik It vrtinds solike a sick gnbler'k eotioqoy, but I poe we tan petition the Legitdature and have it altered. Clarisse,' said Gord.m in the evening, "Cla- tynirk has told me yon ioVed on nother, en I have given Von to him entitelv. t am glad, girl, that ymi hsV this time madethohie nf k man who Vnows how to pettifog, jam tip. without b'drig too lsf.y to work on a fatmv ClnriS laughed 1n her sleeve. Henry iValie snd Clarisse tordy wefn tnar- h?d. After the depsrtvtve of tire wedding gtiestson that ewer t occasion, even after the ceremony vhich launched them into the Inextricable, yclrped Tnatrmvmy, rVen after the cake.tnnfic, tea, kissing, wine, dancing, and coffee, alter all were finished, after all their fricwSa were gone, Clarisse fbtind hertell between her husband and her father, She turned her eyee to the hitler and eaid beseechingly. Fether, will you forgive Us V forgive youl for whai child !' Why you know I-l-loVod aV4 wished lo wed Henry Leslie, my first flame, but you would not content in our sllisnce And recollect, too, perhaps said llie young husband, 'that when I firat tame litre, the mu tual agreement was thai we were to hocus po eus each etheV as much as we pleased Well, what I waa about lo ray tc-ulinUed the bride, 'is that Dick Quirk and Henry Les lie are the same person. 'Sags and lightning V exclaimed Gordon springing lo his feet ; but he paused and sur veyed both the culprits attentively and Ihen continued without passion 'What an old fool I have been to fancy that my girl didn I know enough to choose a fit ai.d proper huabahd. For give you ! yea I will, and bless you into the bar gain. Come to think of it, ! am glad it has happened so, for we shan't have tn petition the General Assembly in order lo get rid of that blamed sick gobbler scthlcqiiifrng Quirk Quirk Quirk. Go to beJ children.' laTEacaTiNO RenNieVRmko Wasntftctoft. The Montreal Courier saya: There ia an interesting fact connected With the English 4(Vh regiment, which has just arriVcd in this city in relieve the OOtli RifleS) bwmd for Hali fax. Thi-re his been lor upwsrd of a century a fti!cmaeW lodge in the 46th in this lodge George Washington was httde a mason, while the regiment tvaa stationed in the colonies, be fore Ihe outbreak of Ihe ReVnldtionary war. The regit.tr r tf this lodge contains Washing ton's signature in hi own hand writing, and it still pnnr-ssr the II. hie which it made use of when this great man waa initiated. The Chest, containing the books and regalia of the lodge, was captured by the Americans during tbe war and taken to Ws-hington, but when it was dis covered What it Contained, it Wat immediately rent b ck. tt underwent a similar fate some ycais utter, beitijj taken by the Prenc.h at St Lucia. It waa then c tried to Paris, and its contents being exsmim-rit waa immediately re lumed lo the regiment by the Frcacb authori ties. We believe a detail of these facts with the dates and lull particular! w Id be found in ihe Freemason's Msgaiine of a few years back. A CuookfciJ RIVrr. A Metathoree corres pondent of sn Indiana ?aper, in giving a de scription of the Rio Grande riveri eaya: Ima gine four nf the crnohedest things in the world, tlieti imagine four mole twice ss crooked, and then fancy In yourself a large riVer THRtk TiMrs ss crooked ss all iheso put together, and ynu haVe a fsittt IHea r)f the crooked dipwi;ion . . .... - .A.. of this iluilgmy crooned river. 1 here is no drill ih it from tho fact that tt is so crooked thst timber can't find it way far enough down lo lodge two e'.tt ks together but few snakes, be cause it is not straight etimigh lo swim in, shd Ihe fih sre all in the whirlpools in the bchtlsi be cause they can't find Iheir tVay out. llifda fre quently silempl In fly across the river, and light on the same side they start from, being decei ved by li e different rrnoks! Indeed, you may be deceived whrh you think vou see scrose it, snd sonic of the b'hliyi eajr it ia so difhrd twis ting there isn't but Out side lo it. A Good PAaamasss. We bate beard thai previous to a tfcfcebt Well contested battle, a young Volunteer officer inked leave of a cer',,;,, celebrated Major General lo go aud his fa thet on hi death-bed. Go said bia command-r- tmiiing sarcasti cally ; You honor y j,thsr and mother, il your ,'vyi m.y i(iflg in ,hl ,JW -- w rntens op AnmtTiAiKG. I siua insertion, . . do do . do J,, . . . Kvety subsequent inserthn, . . 0 0 0 T5 1 OS) e sr. 1 eariV Advertisement, i . L.ir column, 1 1 8, three square, f t a j two squat, f on i square, ,!. Half-yearly t one column, $18 t half column, $t t three sqi-tres, f , two uarea. 5i nne iquaie, S3 no, Ader1if menl Ml without direction aa tn the length nf time tltey are to he published, will be continued until ordered out, and charged accord Ittgly. (jKixten lints or less make a square. Portrait of Havel Ca, . v cow J. Now you that was cnt out for a man, but so Villaincmly spoiled in making up, t il attsnd to your esse. For what end did you lortt open the world's door, and ruth in uncalled, like a man thased by a mad bull t What gttod do you x- pett ts bestow epon ywit fellow men t Some ttsefal invention, some heroic act, some great iteovery or even one solitary remark? No! Tbote that loolt fer anything good from you, Will be jrtit at badly fooled tt the man who eangbt a skunk and thought it wat a kitten ; or the wo man who made greeeaef gun powder tea. You know where the neatett, tightest pantt, with the. strongest straps tan be rot 'on tic,' but you don't Virew where the useful lectnrs will be delivered: yon know th color of a Vett, bet never studied the gorgeoat baet of the rainbow, unless it was to Wish for a piece to make a cravat of; yott know how a fool feels in full dress, bot yon don't Vrrow how ft man feels when he eats the bread earned by the sweat of bia brow ; ynu know how a TnonVey looks, for you tee one every day twen ty timet in yenr landlady's looking glass, but you don't know how a man feels after doing a gffod action, you don't go where that tight it to be teen. Oh! yon wasp-waitted, catutb-mouthed baboon-shouldered, calliper-legged, goots-eyed, heeV-Taeed, be-whiakered drone in the world's bee biVed. What are you good for ! Nothing but to cheat your tailor, neatly to litp by rttte a line from some milk and cider poetaster, tenti mentally talk love, eat oystera and act the fool shamefully. I sav dnet your motht know you're out ? Iam afraid ynn have no moth 'r nor nevrr bad. Yon are of no more me in thia world then A time piece in a beaver dam, or e m-tras in a hog pen. You rill no larger spare in this world's eye than th toenail of a mosquetoe in a market bouse-, or 4 stump-tailed dog in all out doort i )rU are at little thought f as the fellow who knocked his grandmother' last tooth down her threat : and as for your braint, ten thousand t'uch could he preserved in a drop of brandy, and have aa much tea room at a tad-pol In Lake Superior. And It for your ideal, you bave but one. and that ia stamped on your leaden akull an inch deep that tailors and females were mad to be gulled by you, and that you think decent people enVy your appearance. Poor, useless tobacco worm ! You kre a decided I v hard cat I Qrkttk DtcistoN. Various and amusing sre the stories told of Justices of the Pesce, popu larly called &utrei, who as they temper mercy ith the strict rigor of the law, give judgments of the most ludicrous cast Our Baltimore ma gistrates, in times gone by, have given some strange decisions, but they are fairly eclipsed by the following, which we find chronicled by a correspondent of a Cincinnati paper. ,fciaM more Clipper. I knew a 'Squire' in Pennsylvania before Whom a certain Henry Bmnner, who did not a bound much in worldly goods, wat brought fur a breach of the p ac. The rs.e was a flsjr- nnl one, and the evideuce was clear and expli cit. Well, Henry,' ea id the Squire, 'It UhV wort while to bear your defence, de case is so blain, unt Vcn you hat de monhy, I should fine you dree dollars, aber I knows you tint got do luat red cent, put as te ends of justice inusht not be defeated, lie blantsfi shall pay my costs unt I will bay de konstablcra costs mineself, and you, Henry, are tien-by sentenced to shop wood four days oo thine lathi ss your fine." The Indians On the Tonewsndo reservation, New Yorki had given great trouble to all the neighboring magistrates With their petty and vexatious law-iuits, and great complaints on the subject being insde known to De Witt Clinton, then Governor of the State, he appointed one of tbe tribe to act as Jut-lice of the Peace in all ct ses to which Indians were parties. Some six months after) the magistrate who bad been mo.t incommoded by these Indian suils, met hie bro ther squire, snd very naturally asked him how be got along in bis new employment and whe ther there waa as much business in that line aa formerly. ''Spo-e not said the Indian, 'only two cares yet.' Only two cases in six month replied hie neighbor in surprise J ' Met us hear how you ma naged the last Well said the new squire, 'Tom Silverhee'e sued Nicholas Obale for assault and battery. It was a clear case, en I directed the plaintiff1 sbobld haVe thirty lathea, and tbe defendant fif ty lashee too, and the witcee five lashes a- piece( and order.-d the constable to pay thC' I have had no ct--- r. ' Rather Oui A uu:, ,-.:-.if : IihI p'acc in one, of the Fk'huii pr v ucea a shot! lime:,oce. A rrenchtnsii who, in htd ione with Ns p.. I eon to Russia, and Was long since believed dead, suddenly MuMed. Hie Wife hai mteantim been married to threw t-lher husband, and had jual buried the last of them, when her first relumed from Russia, and ah began married lite once more tnew, and under hspfiy a ispices.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers