FROM BASEBALL TO BOCHES BY SPECIAL ARRANGEMENT WITH COLLIER'S WEEKLY (Continued) On Board S. S. . Dear Joe: I wisht you could get a flash at this here ship which is gonna try to take us to Europe. I can't tell you the name of it, be cause if a doughboy mentions names in writin' back home he's liable to get pinched, and then it's the same as throwin' rocks at the President as far as the judge is concerned. Also I can't tell you the place we're sailin' from, but I guess you know they ain't many ships startin' out for Europe from Phenix, Ariz., or Butte, Mont., hey? The whole boat was painted by a set of maniac painters which was opposed to prohibition, and the fore man must of seen they was nobody died of thirst while they was on the job. There's a swab of pink here and a swab of blue there, and in be, tween they got samples of choco late, strawberry, orange, vanilla and allied flavors. This is called camou flage and is supposed to keep the submarines from seein' the ship, and, in the event they do see it, to scare 'em away. Amongst the bunch on board is about forty horseshoes, a hundred four-leaf clovers, a gross of rabbits' I feet, and a lot of other A-l charms | to keep off torpedoes. In case them i charms Quit cold on us, we got an I ace in the hole in the shape of a | bevy of six-inch guns. I ain't i knockin' the charms, Joe, but them j guns look good to me! Well, after I left the recruitin'! office that day with the nineteen! other lucky guys and a soldier in j charge, we all got on a train and i rode to the army camp. Most of the gang felt about half as good as I did, which is good enough for any body, but they was two guys, Joe, ■which did nothin' but knock all the way. They claimed they was simps for joinin' the army, and so was we; that the life was short and the food shorter, and all in all the.v was nothin' pleasant connected with it. They kept at it till I couldn't stand it no longer. "How did you guys come to en list?" I says. "We didn't!" says one of them. "We come to get some dope about bein' exempted, and the big stiff in the office talked us into joinin'." "Sure!" says the other guy. "This country's about as free as diamonds at Tiffany's! A man has got to fight whether he wants to. or not. All them well-to-do millionaires is back of this war, and—" "Aw, let go!" growled the soldier in charge of us. "I think both you guys is so yel lah," I remarks, "that if you was round you could pass for grape fruit. If you make any more cracks about the U. S. Army, I'm gonna see if you'll bounce!"* "You ain't man enough!" pipes one of the knockers. Joe, how could I stand for a crack like that after just bein' ac cepted for the American army. That was not (only insultin' me, but the flag too. I let him have it on the chin, and he flops on top of the soldier. "Hey, you!" bellers the last-named party, "call your shots, will you?" He comes over and pushes me back in the seat. "Lay off!" he says, j "You'll git all the scrappin' you kin handle when we git over to France!" "They ain't no harm in rehearsin' a little, is they?" I says. "Shut up!" he admits. Well, Joe, we finally got to camp, without no more bloodshed, and the first thing we run into there was an other one of them popular physical examinations. Two guys was turned down. One of them was the guy I had gone to work and bounced on the train. I didn't think I had hit him that hard. The next thing we all got to take a bath, and it turned out they was some conscientious objectors to washin' in our midst. Them guys had to do an Annette Kellermann in front of a hose for about five min utes. That bein' done, nothin' less than a sergeant took charge of us. He told us we'd have to get most of our trainin' on the way over to France, because the regiment was expectin' to leave camp at any min ute after the alarm clocks went off in Washington. The next thing, I'm glad to say, was breakfast. I'm tellin' you all this, Joe, for the simple reason that you'll have to go through all of it when the drafters get around to your number. When you get through with my let ters you'll know just what you gotta expect, and if you don't like it, it may make some difference to the Board of Aldermen in Calcutta; but, Joe. it won't make no difference to these guys in charge of the U. S. Army. ITAD PALPITATION OF THE HEART "Stomach Was Bad — Was Nervous" Says Sirs. S. Thompson, 253 S. Elev enth street, Harrisburg. "For a long lime 1 have been bothered with stomach trouble and nervousness, niy stomach was sour and there was an accumulation of gas, I had pains in my side and back. Was bothered with palpitation of the heart, felt tiTed and had no ambition to do my work." "I saw Sanpan advertised in the papers and concluded to try it, and I must say that above ailments are all gone, and I don't feel that I was ever sick." Sanpan is being intro duced at Keller's Drug Store, 405 Market street, Harrisburg. Harrisburg Philadelphia Auto transportation, con necting at Philadelphia with Auto transportation house for New York, start ing .Monday, March 18th, returning Tuesday, March 19th; regular trips will be started; 5-ton trucks used, bond furnished. Owner A. T. Raffensperger & Son. Phone 1396 Hudson Sales Agency. Ask for L. H. Hagerling. WEDNESDAY EVENING, By H. C. WITWER Well, the next stop was was the Quartermaster's Department, where we was give uneyforms. You ought to see me in mine, Joe. If X say it myself, I look as good as SSOO a week would look to a motorman! It fits me like an eel's skin, and it's got that baseball uneyform 1 used to wear lookin" like overalls. After 1 had give myself the once over when I was all togged out, dressed to kill (the Germans), I felt like sittin' down and sendin' Mack a tel egram, thankin' him for eannin me off the team. In a couple of more days they staked us to a lot of other furnish in's like blankets, shoes, overcoats, and so forth, and by the end of the week wc had more stuff than the average younj? couple starts out life with. Uncle Sam is sure good to his nephews, take It from me! I don't see how they can afford to Rive us all this stuff, and some of these guyß is livin' better right now than thev ever did in their lives. We didn't leave any minute for France, like the sergeant told us, but stalled around the camp for about a month after I joined. I tjnet up with a lot of regular guys here, and they was dumfound ed when I confessed to bein' Ed Harmon, the famous southpaw. They wouldn't have it no other way but that I would pitch for their ball team when we got to France, in case we played another regiment, or the Red Cross guys, or the Germans, or, in fact, anybody, for a series. We played one game before leav in' the camp with a team from B Company of the same regiment (I'm in C Company). Of course I was in the box for us, and I guess I don't have to tell you who won the thing. I had nothin' on the ball but the cover, yet they only Stung me for two hits. After that, first base could of been in China, for all they knowed, and we quit in the seventh with the score 12-1, favor of us. The whole camp seen the game, includin' the officers and the colo nel, which is a nice old guy at that. He hates baseball like a chorus girl hates a telephone, and after it was all over he demanded to see me, and he says if I can put as much stuff on a bomb when T get to France, I won't be a doughboy very long. A doughboy is what they call a private in the infantry. I don't know why they call us that, because thirty-three dollars a month ain't much dough, is it, Joe? Still, when you figure you're get v.in* food, clothes, a place to % sleep, , Joctors. medicine, and a chance to - ■ ■ 1 ■ ■ ■' ''food Will Win the War---Don't Waste It ' ! ,|ir —' "Carpet Sample" Rugs: $3.45 jjQf JII Spring Rugs: Unusual Quality 1 These rugs are 1/4 yards long—made from samples $ £sß Complete Lines in New Patterns Now Ready of Wilton Carpets in choice designs. They are bound at Bxlo ft - u^s ' on the edge. A most desirable rug for halls, rooms and STR V 8.6x11 ft. Tapestry Rugs at 9x12 ft- AH*Fiber Rugs, door ways. Fe ISBUR __ __ Complete Lines of the Most Desirable Furniture Procurable f A wait Your Inspection During the Three Thursday, j 1 uj-- —** l " "m ft nI 3 B ■ 9 tr^ I I I H bhhJ II rue ' P r * ces are 3-Piece Living Room or Library Suite | gj 1 , J I lgHcr Since tHe war A suite of this character will fit In well Each piece 1s roomy with high back. V Si I | Q Sf _ H Started But then w '" l an y style home furnishing scheme. *PM Note the large handsome wing design <1 I/ II B I 1 , ' , i r ' be c °" ectly u *? d llvln ? room or backs. The upholstery Is In imitation n P I We Have had fore- lj brar y an <l ' s exceptionally serviceable for 1 brown Spanish leather and of excellent t cars to conic. Quality. Chinese Chippendale Dining Room Suite us to make Two Leading Values in Genuine Chinese Chippendale—the most unique an# wmmd The Buffet is 60 inches long, large and Contracts far ahead. -1 of all designs used in furniture to repro- 1 f / | spacious. Extension table has five logs. Anfl Wf rnillfl dr> I C\ "M r><4- r duce old period styles. Nine pieces In this Mi The China Cabinet has mirror back, to re- V^neSTyS charming suite —made in Antique Mahog- S / ■ fleet crystals. The arm chair and five side fKio • K#rane# r\( mir ajiy. Gjand Rapids manufacture. Finest f J fl § W chairs are upholstered with genuine hlack L"3 UCLdUSC U1 uur . enormous storage Colonial Cedar Trunk Cedar William & Mary Design Queen Anne Design facilities. chest Chest Dining Suite Dining Suite c _ u f I bothatwhlle throughout, closely fitted and w.ll W=--— Trunt i : , coM .„ t cal)ln J; .] ffiVyo>Vn i,. K ;"a.;rT.fi'l& A r!; these shipments last <t> i o Cf\ \l_ work "" ""X'2* T" M ' shade. The large buffet has 3- G> -4 C\ f\ brown. Brown Spanish genuine Q? -4 HP' i i T* I "> "VI I (DO>l pane! mirror back. Kxtension $ 1 I I I leather seats on chairs. China (D I '/ k W ~ arf * ahlp tn QAVP Viwoi'v table, china cabinet, and one arm t I I | cabinet has a drawer at bottom 'I 111 WCaIC dUIC lO adVC ***•* m. and three side chairs, genuine I If Suite comprises. Buffet, China 1 I 91 . 1 , i f leather covered, make complete v Cabinet. Kxtension Table, Arm V O U 1 suite of nine pieces. Chair and five side Chairs. i-uiiaiuciauic _____ 4-Piece Fumed Oak Livin* Room Suite =?= Easy Riding Comfortable Baby Carriage <Sc Co.—Furnitme^Store in the^tate^ see the world—changing the map here and there if you don't like the way it is now—it really looks like Uncle Sam is a sucker to pay us at all, eh? By the time we was ready to leave camp I had learned how to march a couple dozen different ways, salute, the manual of arms, how to keep myself and a gun clean, how to care of my kit. and how to lire off a rifle without killin' the colonel. Every one of them things, and a lot more, looks like a cinch right off the bat, and every one of them takes about a month before you can do 'em right, and that's if you got more brains than there is in Har vard. Well, Joe, one mornin' the orders comes from Washington for us to start on our joyride to Berlin, and you ought to of seen the way that camp busted up. Everybody was as full of pep as an epileptic clog dancer and as happy as a dame with her first engagement ring. We was all whistlin' and singin' and joshin' each other, and even the of ficers was grinnin' except when they passed a private. Just before we got on the special trains the colonel made a speech tl)at was a knockout! He said our regiment had made a name for itself here and there, and he knew we'd be a riot once we got to France. He also reminded us that they was other reasons for us goin' over outside of the ocean voy age and not to think this was gonna be the same as the regular monthly clambake of the Bartenders' Social Association We was due for some rough goin', but he knew we'd make it rougher for whatsoever blocked traffic when we was tearin' acrost France. When he got through we give him a cheer that must of woke up ceme tery inmates all over the U. S. Then the chaplain tried out a prayer on us, and we piled into the trains the happiest hunch of guys that ever pulled on shoes. I felt the same as 1 did the day I fanned Cobb with a guy on third. I ain't allowed to tell you how we got on board the ship Anally with out half America knowin' it, but we did, and we stuck one over on them German spies. (Just like we're gonna stick it over on their boss.) I hope them censors ain't eamou flagin' these letters on me Yours truly, ED HARMON. (Formly the prominent southpaw.) (Next instalment in an early issue.) HARRISBURG TELEOTRAPH "DRY" DRIVE IS TO OPEN HERE Co-operating Churchmen Aim to Get Out Big Anti- Liquor Vote The prohibition organization here is getting stronger every day and representatives of the various; churches co-operating with the Antl-! Saloon League have now completed a working schedule comprehensive and practical. The basic notion* of course, is to get results at the pri-, maries and all efforts are to be turn-1 ed toward getting out the voters. j By May 1, the only day for regis tration in a city of the third class, it is the hope of the antiliquor forces that every voter who wouM like to see "booze" abolished is enrolled. Voters who registered 151 st fall can change their party enrollment or can enroll now, if they failed to enroll in a party when they registered last fall. In order to change registra tion, however, it will be necessary for the registrant to have voted at the last election for a majority of the candidates of the party with whom he now desires to enroll. Active work will begin to-day when the Rev. Dr. J. Bradley Mark ward, chairman of the dry ratification committee of Dauphin county, will preside at a meeting of the com mittee for the purpose of taking up the task ward by ward. The Rev. Mr. Krenz has been busy in the out lying districts for nearly two weeks and he will be brought into Harris burg to help on the local campaign. He reports that the sentiment for prohibition is even stronger than expected and that pledges to enroll and get to the primaries are com ing in briskly even without solicita tion. It was said to-day by representa tives at the committee meeting that the dry forces will not endorse any dry candidate with regard to party. That is to say, if there is a wet can didate who seems to have a chance of being nominated, due to divided opposition by several dry candidates, then the committee will try to con centrate on one man in order that a wet candidate does not win out. Subcommittees were appointed this afternoon for canvassing of the vari our wards. TALKS OX "SEEING AMERICA" The Rev. A. S. Williams, pastor of the Camp Curtln Memorial Metho dist Church, last bight delivered an illustrated lecture, "Seeing Ameri ca." The proceeds will be used for the Red Cross Auxiliary of the church. SEVEN GENERAL OFFICERS LOSE OLD POSITIONS Men Unable to Stand Physical Ordeal Barred From Overseas Service Washington, March 13.—Seven general officers of the Array, five of them now corrfmanding National Guard and National Army divisions in this country, have been found physically unfit for overseas duty by a medical examining board, and, in the case of the divisional com manders. will be assigned to other duty. .This is in line with the an nounced policy of the War Depart ment to send to France only general officers who are prepared to stand the physical ordeal which a com mand on the battle line entails. The officers with the recommen dation of the examining board were announced by Major General March, acting chief of staff, as follows: Major General Thomas H. Barry, Regular Army, to be relieved from command of the Eighty-sixth (Na national Army) division, Camp Grant, Illinois, and assigned to com. mand the Central Department, Chi cago, relieving Major General W. H. Carter, U. S. A., retired. Major General Charles G." Morton, Regular Army, to be relieved from command of the Twenty-ninth (Na tional Guard) division, Camp Mc- Clellan, Ala., and assigned to other duty. Major General Edwin J. Greble, National Army, to be relieved from command of the Thirty-sixth (Na tional Guard) division. Camp Bowie, who was discharged from his com mission in the National Army, and assigned to other duty with his reg ular rank of brigadier general. Major General William H. Sage, command of the Thirty-sixth (Na tional Guard) division, Camp Shelby, Miss., discharged from his commis sion in the National Army and as signed to other duty with his Regu lar Army rank of brigadier general. Major General Edward H. PI urn mer, National Army, to be relieved from command of the Eighty-eighth (National Army) > division, Camp Dodge, la., discharged from his commission in the National Army and assigned to other duty with his Regular Army rank of brigadier general. Major General William A. Mann, National Army, to be discharged from hla commission In the National Army and to remain on his present duty as commanding the Eastern Department with hla Regular Army rank of brigadier general. Major General Richard M. Blatch ford. National Army, to be dis charged from his commission Jn the National Army and remain on his present duty commanding the De partment of Panama with his Reg ular Army rank of brigadier gen eral. General officers who are to re place the divisional commanders have not yet been selected, so far as could be learned and they may not be until the medical board has examined many other officers who would be in line fcr service in France as divisional commanders if they pass the required physical test. Major General Mann commanded the "Rainbow Division'' when it went to France, but later was re lieved of that command and re turned to this- country. Shortly aft erward he was given command of the Eastern Department, relieving Major General J. Franklin Bell, now commanding the Seventy-seventh, (National Army) division at Camp Upton, N. Y. Farm Work at Orphanage Keeps Expense From Rising Sunbury, Pa.. March 13.—Robert Graham and William Dixon, of Phil adelphia; August Loucli, Pittsburgh; George Hollinger, Harrisburg, and John McCleary, Johsonburg. com mittee on homes and kindred chari ties of the Grand Lodge of the In dependent 'Order of Odd Fellows in Pennsylvania, yesterday completed the audit of the accounts of the Cen tral Pennsylvania Odd Fellows' Or phans Home here where 175 chil dren are living. It was found that the expenses did not exceed those of the previous ydar. According to J. W. Stroll, president, this was due to the fact that the management is living up to the rules of the food administration and also that the farm largely raises its own food. IX NEED OF CI/QTHING An appeal for clothing has just been made by the Salvation Army. Clothing for men, women and chil dren is urgently needed by the re lief organization. Persons desiring to aid by contributions of clothing which they are not using, should call 3692-R on the Bell telephone and a Salvation Army man will call for any clothes, newspapers or magazines. KXMST IN BRITISH FORCE With three recruits secured the British Canadian commissioners will conduct another examination to night at the courthouse. The three recruits will be sent to Canada shortly. MARCH 13, 1918. Spies Face Noose in America Soon : Washington, March 13.—Death penalty tot convicted spies Is pro vided for in a bill introduced yes terday by Representative M. Clyde Kelley, of Braddock. The measure is planned to be the tinal weapon in the hands of the JJni'ted States government against the operation of enemy agents in this country. Under its provisions "any person * • who acts as a spy for any government with which the United States is at war or any ally of such government, and who seeks information with the intention of communicating it to the enemy, shall, upon conviction thereof, suffer death by hanging by the neck." Mr. Kelley believes the laws now on the statute books give the enemy an opportunity of operating with comparative impunity, as they are often brought before the courts on some minor charge that calls merely for a term of imprisonment or a fine upon conviction. BARON BI.YTHSWOOU DEAD IX ENGLAND By Associate! Press London, March 13.—Baron Blyths v ood, Lieutenant-Governor of Guern sey and dependencies from 1903 to 1908, died yesterday at Douglas Sup pert, I,anarkshire. Harrington B. Douglas Campbell, third Baron Blytliswood, was born in IS 15 and succeeded to the title in 1 ftl 6. He was former commander of the Scots Guards and served in lSgypt and South Africa. He became a ma jor-general in 1898 and was a K. C. B and C. V. O. His heir, the eldest of three sons, is the Honorable Arch ibald Douglas Campbell, a captain in the Scots Guards. mm BEST THERE 15 FOR AILING SKIN You will And in Poslam the quick relief you seek for ailing skin, the active help you need to be rid of Pimples, to heal Kczema, to drive away Hashes, Redness and to clear Inflamed complexions. When Poslam is applied, angry skin is pleasantly soothed, irritation is al layed. Itching, however intense, is ended. Nothing but a healing power rare and unusual could accomplish such complete and satisfying work. That is what Poslam possesses in the highest degree. Sold everywhere. For free sample write to Emergency laboratories, 243 West 47th St., New York City.—Ad vertisement. Just Apply This Paste and the Hairs Vanish 0 (Helps to Beauty) A safe, reliable home-treatment for the quick removal of superfluous hairs from your face or neck Is as follows: Mix a stiff paste with some water and powdered delatone, apply to objectionable hairs and a|U>-' a or 3 minutes rub off, wash the skin and the hairs are gone. This aim*.** treatment is unfailing and no pain or inconvenience attends its use, but to avoid disappointment be certain you get genuine delatone. j DRESS UP! I 3 Get into one of our J New Spring Suits I The styles are the very A latest and the nice part I of it is that ■ You Don't Need The Cash. We clothe the family. I 86 X. 2ND ST., COR. W ALNUT. B immbh ■■■■■mi 9
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers