Wyoming democrat. (Tunkhannock, Wyoming Co., Pa.) 1867-1940, December 02, 1868, Image 1

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    HARVEY SICKLER, Publisher,
VOL VIII.
ill DO ill ing mot rat.
\ Dunocrauc weekly
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RATES OF ADVERTISING
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one ••;uare "no or three insertions- % -SI .60
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KKALESTATE, PERSONAL PROPERTY, and GKNERAL
ADVERTISING, as uiay be agreed upon.
PATENT MEDICINES and other advertisements iy
the column :
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Ituaitiess Cards of one square or less, per year
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;7P ginroniALor LOCAL ITEM mWeitisiog—with
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made wiih permanent advertisers
KXLCi ron.-. ADMINISTRATORS ondAUDl
roit'B NOTICES, of the usual length, 82,50
" JITI'ARIE 3 .-ex.-eeding ten lines, each; KELI
, iUI'S and LITERARY NOTICED, not of general
•jtcrcst, -ne half tno regular rates.
rif A lvertisements must be tian-le 1 in be Trics-
AV N'aos. to insure insertion the same week.
JOB WORK
: til kinds neatly executed and at prices to suit
Ml I K ANSI EXT ADVERTISEMEX i S* u.l JOB
WORK it.ust be paid for, when ordered
Business Notices.
. > K.& W. ELITTLE ATTORNEYS AT
11 LAW Office on Tioga Street Tunkhannock I'a
I I 8. tOOTBI, PHYSICIAN A SI Rt.LON
IL. Newton Centre. Luzerne County Pa
/I U PAIIHHT ATTORNEY AT LAW.
v7 OUi-e at t'ue Court House, in TuukLanock
Wr.uuing Co. Pa.
Uj M. JTI'IAI'TrATTORNK\_ AT LAV. of
fice in Stark's Brie k Block Tioga St., I unk
aaniMM k. Pa.
'|V j til VSt. ATTORNEY AND COUNSEL
1 LOR AT LAW, Nicholson, Wy..ning Co-, Pa
Especial attention given to settlement of deve
dent's estates
X: h! n. i'a. Dec. 5. f7a!9y 1 _ j
AT J. TV 11, SON. ATTOK.NFY AT LAW, Col
.*T • lading an 1 Real Estate Agent. lowa Lands
fur sale. Scranion, Pa. 3&tf. ,
T W, RHOAJM, PHYSICIAN ASI RGEON,
J . will attend promptly to all calls in his pro
fession. May be fojnd at his OCiee at the Dru„
jiore, or at his res; lenee on Putiuan >reet, formerly
occupied by,A. K. Pe.-kham Ecq.
office on SECOND floor o! NEW J LWEI.UY STOMJ on
TIOGA St. vS-nIS-Oin.
PACIFIC HOTEL,
170, 172, 171 &• 176 Greenwich Street
ONE DOOR ABOVE CORTLANDT STREET, SEW YORK.)
The unpersi lined takes pleasure In annonncing to
his numerous friends and patrons that Irom this
•late, the charge of the Pacific will tie
$2.50 PER DAY.
lleing sole Proprietor of thi- house, and therefore
free fruui the too common exaction of an Inordinate
rent, he is fullv nt>le to meet the downward tenden
-v ui prices without any falling otr of service.
'it will now, a? hcretotoie, la? his aim to maintain
undlniished the favorable reputation of the Pacific,
which it has enjoyed for many yearf. as one of the
be-t of travelers' hotels.
THE TABLE will lie bountifully supplied with
every delicacy of the season.
Till. ATTENDANCE will be found efficient and
and obliging. _ . . , . .
THE LOCATION will tie found convenient lor
those whose business calls them in the lower part of
the city and of ready access to all Kail Road and
steamUt Lines. ' joHn pATTEX
Oct 10th 1868. nIS-6m.
HUFFORD HOUSE.
TUNKHANNOCK. WYOMING CO., PA.
r rnis E-TABLI.SIIMENT HAS RECENTLY
I Veen refitted anl lurnished in the latest style.
Every attention will be given to the comfort and
e nvenience of those who putroniie the House.
11, HUFFORD. Proprietor.
TunkhanTock, Pa., Juno 17, 1863 —v7n4l.
BOLTON HOUSE.
HAUHISHI'ItGs HENNA.
The undersigned having lately purchased the"
iiI'EHLER HOUSE " property, has already cora
•ucuccd such alterations and improvements as will
render this old and popular House equal, if not supe
i rior, to any Hots! in the City of llarrisburg.
A continuance of the public patronage is refpeot
fuliy solicited.
GEO. J. BOLTON
WALL'S HOTEL,
LATE AMERICAN HOUSE/
I'U Nik HAN NOCK, WYOMING CO., PA.
rHIS est iblishmeiit ha? recently been refitted an
furnished in the latest style Every attention
•ill be given to the comfort and convenience of those
*ao patronise the House.
T. B. WALL, Owner and Proprietor.;
Tunkhannock, September 11, 1861.
MEANS' HOTEL.
TOWA.ND , P"
H. R. BART LET,.
(Lateolt. B BR AINARI> HOUSE, RWM, N. Y.
PROPRIETOR.
The MEANS HOTEL, i- one ol the LARGEST
sod BEST ARRANGED Houses iD the country—lt
>s Cited up in the most modem and improved (tyle
and no pains arc spared to make it a pleasantand
agreeable stopping pjnee for all,
. v3021-ly.
P ASTMAS givos hisjcustoiuers the benefit of his
* JtuanulactunuK facilities, ani saves to them the
profits usually paid to Jobbers, Middlemen and
■hoieia.e dealers.
TUNKHANNOCK, WYOMING GO,, PA. -WEDNESDAY. DEC. 2, 1868.
; Latent .VVfcs.
Late arrival of New Goods.
! Great Bargains at the New Store of
C. IDetricK ?
in S. Stark's Bri;k Block,
! AT TIKHAIOCK, PENN'A.
Having just returned from the City. I nm new
opening an entire New etoi.lt oi
; FALL GOODS,
and one of the Urges: and richest assortments ever
ofiered in this community. Consisting of
| HIGH AND FANCY COL'IID DRESS
SILKS,
FRENCH AND ENGLISH MERINOS,
EMPRESS AND PRINCESS CLOTH?,
POPLINS, PAREMETTOS,
BLACK AND COLORED
' ALPACCAS WOOL. ARM I RE, PEKIN
AND MOUSELIEU DELAINS. INPORTED
AND DOMESTIC GINGHAMS, PRINTS
; of Beet Manufactures and Latest Styles,
Ladies Olotha and Saequeings, Cloths,
Cassimeres, Yestings
Satenetts, Twee Is,
Jeans, Cottonade"!.
Drills, Denim?,
I ; Ticks. Checks,
Stripes,
Shoetings
Sbirtiog?, Bleached
A Brown. Shawls,
Sontags, Hoods.
Furs, Ladies' Retieuleg, Shopping Bags and Baskets
TRUNKS. VALISES, ami THAN ELING
BAGS,
Latest! Styles,
; Kid, Silk, Lisle Thread, Cotton
Gloves, Hosiery, Notions,
Toilet and Fancy
GOODS, •'
FANCY SO ACS, PERFUMERY,
Ac-, Ac-- A->
i .
Black end Colored I civets,
Ribbons,
Ruffles,
Frills,
Fringes,
Bra ids,
Beads, Ball and Bugle Trimmings
' A Large quantity ofBF.Sf STYLK HOOP SKIRT.?
and COBSHITS, seleect from Manufacturer?, at
greatly reduret prices,
FLANNELS all Colon and Quvlities■
READY MDE
Olotlaing:,
AND GENTS'
Furnishing Goods.
HATS AND CAPS
of Latest Styles,
.. .
CALF. KIP, anl AW, BOOT* A SHOE-,
j Ladies'. Misses', and Children's Kid Prunelle Mo
rocco anil Calf Gaiters, Shoes, and Slippers.
Wall and IV irview Pnpe Window
Curtains, & Curtain Fix
tures. Carpets A
Oil -
Cloths. China,
Glass, and Stone Ware,
Tinware,—made expressly for this
Trade, and warranted to give satisfaction,
20 per cen*. Cheaper than the usual rates in litis |
seet'.cn,
Nailt,
Spikes,
Iron.
Steel,
Horse Shoes
II or so Shoe Nails,
• Nail Rods.
Paints,
Pamt Oils, |
]' a in t er i '
! Material, Putty, I Vindou Class, Kerosene O, J
Hall, "Parlor, .Stand, and Hand
Lamps,
Lanterns, Lamp Chintnies, .shades, \
and 'Earners.
COAL,
AS HI ON, TURF ISLAND, A DHL . SALT j
FLOUR,
FEED,
MEAL,
BUTTER,
CHEESE,
1 LARD,
PORK.
HAMS,
and FISH.
SUGAR,
TEA,
COFFEE
SPICES,
SYRUP. A
e *\ MOLASSES,
WOOD &- WILLOW WARE,
l
ROPES,
CORDAGE,
BASKETS.
BROOMS,
I'A I-S.
TLBS,
WASH BOARDS,
(#PET
sW EEI'ERS,
N BRUSHES, ot all kinds.
n PATENT MEDICINES. DRI Gs. and Difca
I! FLAVORING EXTRACTS. Ac., Ac,
These goods have been selected
i with great care to suit the wants of
i this community, and will be sold as
heretofore, at the lowest living rates
tor cash or exchanged for country
r produce at market prices. Thankful
for the past liberal patronage, I shall
j endeavor by strict attention to my
business, to merit a continuance ot
the same, and will try to make the
g future still more attractive and ben
> ' etieial to customers.
1 j C. DETtHCK.
||flfhi(.
IHE SUICIDAL CAT.
AN UNFORTUNATE GRECIAN BEND.
UY JOUS VIL'ILL.
There was a man named Furguson,
lie lived on Market Street,
He liad a ?peckeled Thomas Cat,
That couldn't well be beat ;
He'd catch more rats and mice and sich
Than forty cats could cat.
fills eat would come Into the room
And climb up on a cheer,
And there he'd sit and lick hisself
And purr so awlul queer,
That Furguson would yell at him ;
Hut still he'd purr-severe.
And then he'd climb tho moonlit fence.
And loaf around and yowl,
And apli, and claw another cat
Alongside of the jowl
And then they both would shake their tails,
And jump around and howl.
Oh this here cat of Furguson's
Was fearful then to see ;
He'd yell precisely like lie was
In awful agony ;
You'd think a first class stomach-ache
Had struck some small baby.
Aud all tho mothers in th*treet,
Waked by the horrid din,
Would rise right up and seareh their babe.
To find some worryin' pin ;
Aud still this vigorous cat would kce t
A hollerin' like siu.
And as for Mr. Furguson
'Twas more than he could bear,
And so he hurled his boot-jack out,
Right through the midnight air ;
Hut this vociferous Thomas cat.
Not one cent did he care,—
For still he yowled and kept his fur
A standin' up on end.
And his old spine a doublin' up
'Just like a Grecian Bend.
As if his hopes of happiness
Did on his lungs depend.
But while a curvin' of his spine
Andwaitin' to attack
A cat upon the other fence,
There catne an awful crack ;
And this here speckled Thomas cat
Was busted iu the back.
When Furguson came down next day,
There lay his edd feline.
And not a lite was left in hint
Although he had hail nine,
"AH this here comes"' said Furguson,
"Of curvin' of his spine."
Now all ye men whose tender hearts
This painlul tale does rack,
Just take this moral to yourselves,
All of you, white and black :
Don't ever go, like this here eat,
To gettin" up your back !
A ITOUNDELAY.
f'otne sit beneath the hawthoruc tree.
And press thy lips to mine ;
I have a merry song for thee,
Will cheer thy heart like wine.
O well the bonny ln-atii may sntllc.
The lark sing clear above :
For wc will love a little while,
Though nU in vain we love.
And green the leaves should be o'erhead.
The bracken brawn beneath :
For oh, that thou and I lay dead
Upon the bonny heath !
MEN WITHOUT HEARTS.— W<> sometimes
meet with men who seetn to think tlral
indulgence in any affectionate teeling i?
weakness. They will re! tun from a jour
ney, and greet their families with a dis
tant dignity*, and tttoye among flscir chil
dren wilh the cold and lofty splendor of
an iceberg surrounded by il- broken frag
ments. There is hardly a moie unnatu
rai sight on earth than one of ih se fami
lies without a heart. A father had better
extinguish a boy's eyes than take away
his heart. Who that has expeienced the
joys of friendship and values sympathy and
affection, would not rather loose all that
is beautiful in nature's scenery than bo
robbed of the hidden treasures of his heart?
Cherish, then, your heart's best affections.
Indulge in the warm aud gushing emotions
of filial, parental and fraternal love.
jpgrA Galveston gentleman, lately stop
ping at the Nicholson House, Bastrop, was
in a room recently occupied by the. Agent
of the Freedmen's Bureau, fine evening,
Tom, a freedman, entered the room to
make a fire, and after doing so sat down,
crossed his legs and made himself at home,
smoking and spitting in the lire place. The
Galvastonian asked him what he meant by
such familiarity : Tom looked up in evi
dent surprise, and immediately arose, hat
in hand, aud in his politest manner, said :
"Beg pardon, Massa ! didn't know you
was a fjemman ; thought yon was dc
Freeelmaris llnreun
Richards was an inevitable chew
er of tobacco. To break himself of the
habit, he took up another, which was that
of making a pledge about once a inpnth
that be would never chew another piece.
He broke his pledge as often as he made
it. The last time I saw him, he told me
lie had broken oil" for gcod, but now as I
aiet him, he was taking another chew.
"Why, Richards," says I "you told mc
you had given up that habit, but T see you
are at it again."
Y es," he replied, "I have gone to chew
ing and left off lying:*
"How much do you ax for your
bald faced goose," said the son of Erin to
the keeper of a museum.
"Is it not a goose ; it is a owl," said the
keeper.
"Devil a bit do I care how owld it is.—
I want it for the boarder*. They'll ale it."
" To Speak Lis Thoughts is Every Freeman's Right. "
SUCH PRETTY FEET.
nr * * *
Two gentlemen were lounging on Broad
way, one fine spring afternoon. Suddenly
, one of turned to his companion and ex
claimed :
"Egad! Ilall, look there! Who is
: she ? "
"Be still, she'll heat you."
And Dick Hall gave his friend an iin
poroptn dig with his elbow, as an enjoin
der for silence.
A lady was approaching them a slen
der, coquettish little figure—clad in a gray
walking suit, cut sufficiently short to ex
pose a pair of feet Cinderella herself might
have envied ; a black beaver hat and a
blue veil concealed her hea I and face.—
And she actually carried her hands in Lor
pockets.
"Whew!" ejaculated Dick. ''l ad
mire 1 er audacity ! "
The wind played hide and seek with
the veil, and at last, after several unsuc
cessful attempts, b.ire it proudiv aiof't, and
it disappeared from view in the distance.
"What pretty feet!" muttered Tom
Grame, unconsciously, aloud.
'The owners of the objects <>i hi> admir
ation turned her face towaids him, an !
flashed an in lignaut glance from her dark
grav eyes, and her face reddened to the
roots of her hair.
"There, stupid ! " cried Dick, angrily
"Youv'e put your foot in it now."'
But it was ah'igcthPr too # Lte lo repent
now. had evidently heard the re
mark, for she wniked haughtily past them,
her head erect, her eyes blazing, and the
"pretty feet' coming down up<>n the pave
ment with an indignant I'ing.
Tom drew himself up to hi? full height,
and exclaimed :
"ileieaf'ter, Dick Hail, please to re
member that at home, 1 am Thomas
Grino, and I am decidedly averse to pet
names. You will address me by that
cognomen 1 "
"The dote e I " was the coo! reply*.
"l)o you know who s! e is?" queri l * J
Tom
"A visitor at the Adams', i believe: a
sort of country cousin.
"And decidedly the prettiest, saneie?t
niece of dry goods imaginable?" ciied |
Tom enthusiaalieally.
"Can't you get me intiodtnvd by some
means or other ■ "
Dick shook Ids head dubious, and re
plied :
"i think it would b. impossible. The
family leave the town this week. 1 un
derstood they were going t<> s U tor Eu
rope, Thursday. in the Sea |t V>,."
"Brother I'' cjacu u t Y n.
Ami, linking iirs arm through that of
ids friend, llmv sauntere<l hick to his Lo -
tel.
A few weeks alter ti.at and Tom had
departed for Fairfield, a little country vil
lage, wherein resides a maiden aunt, who
had declared him to be her heir prospec
tive.
After the first, greetings were over be- j
tvvecn Torn and his worthv aunt, she ask
ed :
"Ain't married yet ? "
"Wasn't the last accounts I had," was
the dutiful reply.
"Anv signs? "' quelle I the it quisitivo
spinster.
"1 don't know what you mean by signs.
If )on menu that 1 gaze at the moon, sigh j
dolefully, and make a gcnei.il iml of my- ,
self, why 1 think not."
Tom set his foot maliciously on the tail
of an unoffending kitten, then calmly j
sleeping on tlie rug before the fire.
"You adacioos bov ! " shrieked his aunt j
grasping the injured feline and seizing tiie
poker
"There Til stop. I never meant to
hurt her." then sotln roc.
"I'll wring her neck the first opportu
nity."
After some apologies oa the nnrt ot Tom
! anil more soothing on the part of the maid
applied to the cat, they at last down again
iin comparative quietness, l'rescndy the
! spinster began again :
"There is the nicest girl over tiie way
"Don't want any nice girl." he inter
! rnpted.
"Don't, eh ? "
J "No, raa'atn —not any 1 ' emphatically
j replied he.
I "Boys don't know what they want."
"Men do "
"Bah !" I tell yon there's the pretty
j girl—''
"Confound the whole tribe of females,
i old and young."
His aunt lifted her finger warningly,
iin desperation, Tom seized his hat and
left the room.
He strolled down towards tho creek,
which ran close by his ami's residence.—
■ As he neared the grove through which it
i passed, he thought he heard cries for
i help.
Directly before him, fast in the mud,
\ was a female, her face beplastered with
the precious nrticlc. her hands vainly grasp
ing at the roots of trees which grew on
i the bank, endeavoring to extricate her
self from her painful and ludicious posi
; t'on. To assure her of bis assistance was
i one tiling; to give it was another. Grasp
ing with one band a bush, he extended
the other to her. She succeeded in lonch
ing tho end of his fingers. Tom forgot
himself, and swore a big oath : but that
did not mend the matter in the least.
After many of attempts he at last grasp-
I ed her arm, and after the most unparalled
exertions, landed her on the bank.
Tom glanced at his pantaloons which
; had been 10 immaculate in their purity
that morning, in dismay. Tiiere was mud
on his clothes, mud on his face, and tnud
mud on his hands. He looked at his com
panion, and (hen, despite his good breed
ing, burst into an uproarous burst of
laughter. She did not appear to be all
pleased with his mirth, and turned up her
muddy little nose in contempt.
* Tom saw her displeasure, and attempted
to apologise.
"1 suppose I ought to let you laugh to
\uur heart's content, after rescuing me
from that predicament, ' said she, a little
crossly.
"Oh, rot by means, miss. I assure you
I haven't the least desire to do sueli a
thing," answered Tom. soothing his mirth
as best lie con! i.
She eyed him suspiciously.
"1 suppose so. 1 think the best thing
we can do is to go home," she mused.
"I'm of your opinion," said the imper
tuiable Tom.
She gathered up her soiied dress in one
hand, and, turning, hesitating said :
"1 would be pleased to know the name
of the gentleman who so kindly assisted
me. My own is Kate Neville, and I re
side in that white house you see yonder."
."she pointed toward a stately dwelling,
plainly discernable above the low hills in
the distance.
"Ah! I beg pardon. lam calleJ Tom
Grame. lam present visiting an aunt,
Miss Rivers, of Fairfield."
"Allow me lo bid you good morning.'
said Kate, turning from tier companion.
•Mi-s Neville," called Tom determined
ly, "shall I have the honor ot calling on
you ? "
"! shall he pleased to see you.
He rubed his hat gallantly, and strode
home to his amiable aunt.
To that estimable la ly he would give
no explanation for the soiled state ot his
garments, telling her plainly that "it was
none of lor business."
The next dav he got himself up in the
most fascinating manner, and sallied out
to call on Miss Neville. The servant
showed him into the pat lor. and Kate rose
to meet him. Site offered him her hand,
which Tom touk with all the freedom of
an old acquaintance.
"Where have I seen her.' bhe is de
cidedly pretty," he muttered to himself.
A pai' 1 of sparkling dark eyes wetc ma
king sad havoc under his left vest pocket.
She sang f r him, and played the most
d-licious aits, and talked so charmingly,
that Tmn foun 1 the morning far advanced
before he took hi- departure
This one visit was the preface to many
that followed, aud Tom found that exis
tei.ee was impossible unless he could call
Kate his own. So, the last time lie called
on her, he stated his case, and Kate doc
tored him—that is, she answered him 'ves,'
to a question he asked her, and a tew
weeks later they wore married
1 hen Miss Rivers was informed of the
engagement she remarked diiiy :
"Torn don't like girls 1"
"I swear 1 do. I adore the whole sex
—o! 1 maids, cats and all,' cried Tom, tri
umphantly.
Miss Rivers laughed long and merrily.
A few weeks after their matrisgc, Kate
said to her liege lord :
"Tom. do von know where you first saw
"Certainly 1 do,' - replied he ; "in a mud
puddle, to be sure "
"No indeed. It was one morning last
spring, on Broadway.' —
Tom suiang excitedly to bis feet.
oil were stopping at Adams , and I
tried to get introduced because — '
•Because 1 had such pretty feet," in
terrupted his wife, smiling and blushing.
GOOD ADVICE. —A bachelor uncle, to
whom his neice applied for advice on ihe
question of choosing between two suitors,
one of whom was rich and the other poor
—the latter, of course being the most ar
dent as well as the favorite lover—sentcn
tiously replied : —"My dear, the question
being stripped of all illusory elements, your
choice simply lies between love and beef.
Now love is an idea, and beef is a reality,
Love you can get along without, but beef
you must have. Therefore make sure of
your beef.
RICH EDlTOß, —Somebody says editors
are poor, whereupon an exchange re
marks :
"Humbug!" Here we are, editor of
a country newspaper, fairly in rolling in
wealth. We have a good office, a paste
pot, a double-barrelled gun, two suits of
clothes, three kittens, a Newfoundland pup
two gold watches, thirteen day and two
night shirts, carpet on our floors, a pretty
wife,.one corner lot, have ninety cents in
cash, out of debt, and have no rich rela
tives. If we are not wealthy it is a pity."
C" An old fashioned clergyman,
named Moore, was riding on horseback
one stormy day, enveloped in a loose
cloak of large proportions, and having a
broad scarlet collar. By the action of the
wind the cloak was tossiug about in all
directions, when a gentleman rode up on
a spirited horse, which shied and almost
threw the rider.
"That cloak of yours would frighten the
de\il," said the gentleman.
"You don't say so !" replied Mr. More
"why, that's just mv trade.
How sun KNEW. —Two young misses
discussing the qualities of some young
gentlemen, were overheard thus ,
"Wall, I like Charlie, but he is a little
girlish ;he hasn't got the least bit of a
beard."
W POPPING INTO THE WRONG BED.
j Last week an interesting event occurred
at one of the hotels in Pittsbnrg, Pa. A
young lady from a neighboring town went
to the city for the purpose of meeting her
betrothed, getting married, and going to
the West to settle there. She was accom
panied by her brother, svho was to act as
groomsman, and her lovci's sister, who
was to be bridesmaid. The intended hu*-
band not arriving in time, the young ladies
arranged that they should occupy the same
bed in the room adjoining that ol the
I bride's brother. Having traveled all the
night before, the bride and her brother be
i ing yvorn out, retired at an early hour, with
instructions to their companion, whom they
left reading in the ladies' parlor, not to
make a noise when she came to bed. as
they did not want to be awakened out of
j their sleep. The young lady getting inter
ested in her book, sat to a late hour. At
I last getting drowsy, she slipped off as
I noiselessly as possible to her room, an l
I quietly retired, as che supposed, to the bed
| occupied by her intended sister-in-law, and
nestling close up alongside under the blank
j ets, was soon sound asleep. Happening to
awaken before her companion, she put her
arms around, as she supposed, the biiJe s
neck, commenced kissing her and calling
her sweet sister and other endearing names
peculiar to the softer sex. In a moment
her kisses were paid back with interest,
aud she found two stalwart arms encir
cling her fair form, and instead of the
bride's she was in the bride's brother's i
arms. She bad mistaken the room. Hero
was a dilemma, and uot knowing how to ;
explain, she commenced sobbing as if her !
heart would break, which awakened tiie j
bride who came to her iescue. The
young man, hoyvever, refused to let her go, j
saying that foituiiat? accident had given ;
him a prize and .he was deteimined not to ;
lose it, and on one condition only would |
he release the young lady from his grasp j
and that was that she would put her arms I
around his neck and kiss him, and promise ;
to be his wife at the same time his sister |
became the wife of her brother. He said
that he had long loved her, and intended j
to ask her that day for her hand, and
thanks to an accident, he had now a better I
bpportnnity than he could ever hope for J
again. The young lady, seeing no alter
native, finally surredered, threw her arms
around the man's neck, and sealed the bar
gain with a kiss, when the young man
covered up his le ad, and she retired to his i
sister's room a promised bride. >he en
joined secracy upon the brother and sister,
but the tiling was to good lo keep. Im
mediately afler they got dressed, the
groom arrived, and after getting breakfast,
dispatched the landlord for a minister, who i
soon came and male the indissoluble knot. '
As soon as tha minister got through, the
groomsman and bridesmaid astonished the
company by taking the place of their j
brother and sister, and, aud request'd- the
minister to repeat the performance, which
he did in less time than it takes to tell it.
"What's the meaning of all this?" asked j
groom X 0.1., who seemed agreeably sir.- i
prised by the scene just transacted. His i
new made wife, now smiling all over, rela
ted to the whole company the incidents of j
the past night- Groom No. 2 . said it was 1
all right : he didn t care how many stories '
his sister told ; that he was the happiest
man alive, and that if hi.-, wife had shed
tears that morning, they were ihe last she 1
should shed, nnless a tear of iey. if he |
could prevent it, and she looked up at her
husband, said sue would never cry a?a u,
when he put his arms around her, for now
he was her own darling husband. The af
ternoon train, instead of one, carried two
happy couples to homes in the West,
w here we hope that year after year they
will by couplets be blessed.— DEM. I'KKSS.
JOHNNY SHRIMP'S COMPOSITION. 1
ON MA ANI) AUNT JEKL'SIIA.
Ma is my mother. lam her son. Ma's
is Airs. Shrimp, she is the wife of Mr.
Shrimp, and Mr. Shi imp is her husband.
I'a is niv father. My name is John
George Washington Shrimp —Therefore
pa's name is Shrimp too: and so is ma s. ;
My ma has a ma. She is my grandma, i
She is mother-in-law to mv pa. My pa ,
says that mother-iu-laws ought to he ve- j
toed I like my grandma better than pa
does. She brings ine ten cent stamps and
bolivars. She don't bring any to pa. May
be that's why he don't like her.
Aunt Jerusha is my aunt. When pa j
was a little boy she was his little sister. I !
like little risters. Dicky Mopps has a lit- j
tie sister, iler name is Rose. I take her
outriding on my, sled. Aunt Jerusha
don't like her She cade her "that Mopps i
girl." 1 think Aunt Jeriwha ought P> be i
ashamed of herself.
Aunt Jerusha is a very pious woman.
She never wants us to talk aloud on Sun
days, and says wc ought to have cold din
ners. She hears me '<ay the catechism,
and knows it ali without the book, i>h
says that Susan Jane is spoiling that bov.
Susan Jane is ma. and that boy is ME.—
She says she hopes that the babv will
show a change of heart. 1f a change of
heart would make Baby stop prying, I
wish so too,
Aunt Jornsba lives with u?. Some
times I think ma would rather have her
live with somebody else. 1 usked Aunt
Jerusha ouce why she didn't marry some
body and set up for herself. She said
that many and many a man had wanted
to marry her, but while her poor Susan
Jane was in such a slate of health she
couldn't think of leaving ? Beside*, she
said, what would become of your poor pa ?
Aunt Jerusha has a state of health too.
TERMS, $2.00 Per. ANNUM, in Advance.
NO. 18.
On Washing-days she has the headciie.
and does her head up in brown paper and
vinegar, and I have to make toast for her
at the kitchen fire. I make some for my
self too.
Annt Jerusha savs that nobody knows
what she lias done for that boy. That
boy is ML, again. 1 told l'n what she
said. Me said it was just so. Nobody DID
know. Ma says that Aunt Jerusha means
well, and that she's pa's dear sister. I
don't see why that's any reason she should
scold me when 1 eat cabbage with a
knife.— X. J'. Commonwealth.
TUB BLACKBIRD. —When A blackbird
j once learns a tune lie flever forgets it or
j any part of I once knew a bird that
could whisle "Polly Hopkins" with a won
derful accuracy. His owner sold him, at
' the -ame time making his purchaser ao-
I quainted with the bird's favorite tune. As
I soon as be got him home, he at once
i hung up the blackbird, and on going to
j the piano struck up "Polly Hopkins." The
; bird's master, however, introduced parts
into the tune he had never heard before ;
so, alter listening a while, he began hissing,
fluttering hi 3 wings, and otherwise signify
( ing h's dista-te ot the whole performance.
1 Much surprised, the gentleman left otf
playing, and then the blackbird openud
! his throat, and favored his new master with
; his version of "Polly Hopkins," nor would
he ever listen with any patience to anv
other version. This same blackbird, after
staying in the service of the above inen
| tioned gentleman for two years, was adop
| ted ly a sesious family, where "Polly ilop
i kin-v' nub all such profanity, were sedu
| onsly avoided. Whenever, poor "Joe"
i (the blackbird's name) attempted to strike
jup the old time, a cloth was thrown over
i the cage and he was silenced. The family
j consisted of an old lady and her two
I daughters, anj every night, at 7 o'clock,
I prayers were read, and the "Evening
i Hymn,'' sung ; and Joe, who was an obedi-
I ent bird, and anxious to conform with the
I habits of the house, speedily learned the
tune, and regularly whistled it while the
| old woman and her daughters sang it.
This went on for six or seven years, when
| the mother died and ;ue daughters separa
ted, and Joe, now an aged blackbird, foil
1 into new hands ; but to bis dying day he
j never gave up the "Evening Hymn."
Punctual, as the clock struck seven, ho
tuned up and went straight through with
it with the gravity ot a parish clerk, —
i Dieloiis Home Pet..
THE NUMBER SEVEN. V
This number i frequently used in the
Bible. On the 7th day <o I onJed lii
work : the 7th month Noah's ark touched
i the ground, and in 7 dnvs a dove was sert
out.
Abraham pleaded 7 times for Sodom,
Jacob served 7 years for Kachael, mourned
7 days tor Joseph, and was pursued a 7
days'journey by L iban.
A plenty of 7 years, and a famine of 7
years were foretold in I'haroah's dream,
by 7 fat and 7 lean beasts, and 7 ears of
full ar.d 7 ears of blasted corn.
On the 7th days of the 7th month ilie
children of Israel tasted 7 day-, and re
mained 7 days in tents *
Every 7 years the land rested ; every
7th year all bondmen were free, and the
law was rea.l to the people.
In the destruction of Jerico, 7 priests
born 7 trumpets 7 days; on the 7th day
tliey surrounded the walls 7 tiroes; and
the v"d of the "th round ihe walls ft;'),
Solomon was 7 years building the tem
ple, and feasted 7 days at tlie dedication.
In the tabernacle were 7 lamps, and tbe
golden oanlestick bad 7 branches Mad
man-washed 7 times iu Jordan.
Job's filends sat with him 7 days and
7 nights, and offered 7 bullocks and 7
i rams iu atonement.
Our Savior spoke 7 times from the.
| cross, on which lie hung 7 hours,and after
his resurrection appeared 7 tiiucs.
In the Lord's prayer are 7 petition* con
taining 7 times 7 words.
In the Revelations wereadof7 churches,
7 candlesticks. 7 stars, 7 trumpets, 7 pla
gues, 7 thunders, 7 \ ils. 7 angels, ana a
7 beaded monster.
i-
A REMARKABLE SETT.
Old farmer Gruff was one morning tug
| ging away with all his might and main at
a barrel of apples, which he was endeavor
ing to get up the cellar stairs, and calling
at the top ct his lungs for one of lus hoys
to lend a helping hand, hut in vain.
When he bad, after an infinite amount
of sweating and puifing, accomplished the
task, and just when they were not needed.
|of course, the "buys" made their appear
ance.
j "Where have you been, and what have
you beefi about. I'd like t > know, iht
you couldn't bear my call r" inquired the
faimcr in an angry tone, and addressing
i the eld. r.
•Out hi the shop setting the saw." ic
plied the youth.
"And you Hick ?"
"Out in the barn * tin the hen."
l "And you sir?"
i "Up in Grannv's room sett in the clock."
"And von young man ?"
"Up iu the garret settin the trap."
' And now M ister Fred, where wer -y HI
Vtlii. V asked the old" fanner to his young
est prog 'ticy, the asperity ot'lii- temper be
ing somewhat softened by tlrs amusinjt
category of answers, "t'ome, let"* hear!'
"On the door step, settui still," replied
the young hopeful seriously.
"A remdikable set I mu-t c<nfea," ad
ded the*unus(.'d sire, dispersin the grin
j ning group with a wave of his hand.