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ICAN
VOL. XXX. NO. 27.
TI ON EST A, PA.. WEDNESDAY, OCT. 20, 1807.
S1.00 PEIl ANNUM.
:
! 1 TTMrTT TlfK TT
1
Japan is about k scnl a lot of ex
perts to this country to teach the peo
ple Low to make tea.
English official 9 estimate that it will
cost the Government $15,000,000 to
suppress tho uprising in India.
Horses mny be cheap enough else-
&hore, but an the Klondike trail even
tho poorest cuts ore worth fifty cents a
. pound.
In tho period 1882 to 1894 the crim
inal record in the German empire in
creased twenty-two per cent., or
twelve per cent, more than the popu
lation. If there" wcro more big estates to
settle, observes the Detfoit Free
Press, there would probably bo more
lawyers. The attorneys in the Davis
case in Minnesota got about $3,000,
000 before tho heirs got anything.
The Germans seem to bo losing
their respect for tho Emperor. Last
year there was eighty-three per cent,
more imprisonments for loso inajeste,
which is tho tortu for the treason of
speaking disrespectfully about roy
alty, than eleven years ago.
Deputy Altorney-Gonoral Elkiu, of
Pennsylvania, dooides that mutual life
insurance companies may issue poli
cies requiring the payment of period
ical premiums of a fixed and definite
. sum in lieu of tho assessments made
upon tho death of members.
The Times of India directs attention
to the iufluenco which tho prevalenco
of distress has had upon the statistics
of crime in that country. As the
scarcity of food pressed more heavily
during tho last two years upon tho
'Agricultural population tho number of
jffenoes gradually rose. But it is
ootod that the excess of crime was
ilmost entirely confined to petty offen
ces against property. This iudioates
that it was hunger which drove many
at the offenders to do what, under nor
Oial conditions, they would perhaps
have never dreamed of doing. Indeed,
(he emaciated condition of tho great
aumbor of prisoners was "further proof
of this. ' A noticeable feature of the
returns has been the iuorease in the
sonviotions of old offenders, whioh
eads ono jail superintendent to sug
gest that "old offenders appreciate the
advantage of jail life in a year of
scaroity."
John Brisben Walker announces that
E. Benjamin Andrews, who has re
signed as Presidont of Brown Uni
versity, will take charge of the Cosmo
politan University. The method of
die now school so far as worked out is
as follows: A student will forward to
the university his name and address
and the purposo for whieh education
is sought, and the studies whieh the
applicant desires to pursue. Eucb
juch statement will go to Dr. Audrows
who will map out the course of study
which he deems the best possible fot
-the applicant iu the light of the infor
mation conveyed. He will then dis
patch his own diagnosis of the appli
cant's case and prescription therefot
to the most eminent export on the par
ticular study with whom ho is ac
quainted. This expert will revise the
oourse aud the aocompauyiug iustruo
' tions aud return the document to
President Andrews.
Czar Nicholas has been entertain,
ing Presidout Foure of France. Prob.
ably never before has the President
of a Eopublio been received with end
roytil pomp. This time, asserts the
Washington Puthfinder, it is tht
Russians that appear to have gone
mad with enthusiasm at the idea of I
French alliance. The Russian ludiei
have loaded the French officers witt
flowers; the French sailors have beer
carried on the shoulders of the frenz
ied populuoe of St. Petersburg, an?
fete upon fete has been given ir
honor of the visitors. Coming or
the heels of tho great demonstration
to Emperor William, of Germany,
this ovation to President Fauie an J
his party is extremely significant
Polities is at the bottom of ever
such function, and the politics of thf
present Hummer's hospitalities at thf
court of Russia is that Russia, in tht
supreme conflict that she must sooner
or later wuge with England, wants tr
know whom sho can depend upon
Germany aud Russia are now swoir
allies; France, though at sword'r
points with Gurmuny, is so jeuloue
of England that she, too, liuds ii
good polities to follow Russia's lead,
aud through France it is hoped tc
eulist Italy, now, with au iu
creaaiug uuvy, au ally worth having.
Thus to-day, there is a more complete
European ulliauce uguinst England
than has existed for u long period.
Such, then, is the true significance of
the flashy oereiuouies lately witnessed
at the Russian court.
THE CALF
One flay through tho primeval wood,
A calf walked homo, n good calves should;
But mado n trial all bent askew,
A crooked trail, us all calves do.
Hinoe then two hundred yenrs have fled,
And, I Infer, the calf Is dead.
Hut still ho left behind his trull.
And thereby hntigs a mortal talc.
Tho trail was taken np next day,
r.y a louo dog that passed that way.
And then a wise bell-weather sheep.
I'ursued the trail, o'er vale and stoop,
Aud drew the Hock behind him, too,
As good bell-weathers always do.
And from that dny, o'er hill' and glade.
Through those old woods a path was mado,
And ninny men wound In and out,
And dodged and turned and Ixmt about,
And uttered words of righteous wrath;
lieenuse 'twas such a crooked path;
Hut still they follow do not laugh
The first migration of that calf.
Aud through this winding woodway Btnlked
WHEN THIEVES FALL OUT.
HE freight steamer
Russiau Bear was
thrashing along
down the Pacific
Ocean with her
blunt prow facing
south, and the cap
tain reckoned he
was somewhere off tho Queen Char
lotte Islands. The Bear was an iron
ship of old-fashioned build and as slow
as they make 'em; any old thing on
the oceau could pass her; yet, pro
tern., she was a passenger boat and was
bringing down the last of the season's
crop of Klondike miners. She was
reputed to have over $3,000,000 worth
of gold dust and nuggets on board aud
her coming was watched for with some
anxiety.
On the morning of the 7th the cap
tain noticed on the western horizon
what appeared to be a steamer coming
towards him. As craft are Bcarce on
these waters, except iu the sealing
season, the captain watched the
stranger's approach with interest not
unmixed with anxiety, because of the
valuable cargo he hud aboard. The
sea was calm for the time of year, and
the steamer seemed to be making for
across the bows of the Bear. The cap
tain ordered the flag hoisted, but the
onoomer showed no answering colors,
which, did not tend to moke the cap
tain feel less uneasy. She was a trim
craft, looking liko a private yacht,
painted black with two slim, tapering
masts set at a rakish slope in line with
her one funnel. She came swiftly
through tho water and turned her
broadside toward the Russian Bear,
when the man at tho wheel calculated
that she was as near as was safe, aud
her engines slowed down so that the
stranger's speed more nearly accorded
with the slow progress the larger ship
was making. A man on the bridge
came to the edgo nearest the slower
vessel and placing his hands to his
mouth, shouted:
"Ship ahoy. Is that the Russian
Bear?"
"Who are you?" roared the captain;
"and what do you want?"
"I waut au answer to my question;
then I'll tell you what more I want."
.After speaking, however, the new
comer did not wait for an answer, but
gave a command to the man at the
whool, who promptly signaled for the
engines to stop, whereupon the yacht
dropped to the rear, notwithstanding
the slowness of the old Bear. The
name was plainly painted on the stern,
aud the captain of the yacht having
seen that this was the ship he was
after moved quickly alongside again,
this time with only a couple of hun
dred feet of water between the two
ships. Daring the slight interval the
crew of the yacht had been busy, and
now a forbidding looking euiiuoii point
ed its ominous muzzle toward the
Boar.
"I'm after the gold, captain," said
the first speaker, nonchalantly, "as
uo doubt you are aware. I'm going to
have it quietly or I'm going to sink
your ship. Which is it to be?"
"Whatever gold we have on board,
if we have any, isn't mine. 1 don't
see what good the sinking of the ship
will do you, aud it would be very in
convenient to me. Better sheer off
aud we'll say uo more about it, I
can take a joke us well as the next
mou."
For a time it looked us if the strang
er heeded tho good advice 451 ven him.
The captain of the yacht rang full
speed ahead aud the sharp prow cut
the water like a knife. The yacht de
scribed a largo circle aud seemed to
be showing off its paces, but this, as
the captaiu of the Bear remarked, was
unnecessary, for he alreudy kuew that
any scow on the Pacific could pass
him. However, it was soon evident
that this was not the intention of the
enemy. Rauging alongside once more,
but this time farther away, there was
a cloud of smoke from the cauuou, a
sharp report and the crash of render
ing plutes. A jagged hole had been
torn iu the ship's side near the bul
warks, whioh, while it did no harm,
scarcely improved the uppearauce of
the Bear.
Once more the yacht swung around
the circle and again ranged Alongside
within a distance of a hundred yards.
"Haul down the Aug," said the cap
tain of the big steamer.
"Well, captain," began tho young
man on the bridge when ut speaking
distunce, "a practical lesson is worth
any amount of talk. I merely wished
to convince you that we know how to
handle our guns and that our guns cau
penetrate your rotten plates. Resides,
you will huve something to show for
your money when you get to port. I
take it we will have no further trouble,
but I'll give you five minutes more if
you wish tocoutult together."
PATH.
Because he wabbled when he walked.
This forest path became a lane;
That bent and turned and turned again.
This crooked lane became a road,
Where mBny a poor horeo, with his loud,
Tolled on beneath the burning sun,
And traveled some three miles In one,
And thus a century and a half,
They trod the footsteps of that calf.
Tho years passed on In swiftness fleet,
Tho road became a village street,
And this, before the men were aware,
A city's crowdod thoroughfare.
And soon the central street was this,
Of a renowned metropolis.
And men two centuries and a half.
Trod in the footsteps of that calf;
Each day a hundred thousand rout
Followed the zigzag calf about.
And o'er his crooked Journey weut,
The trafllc of a continent.
A Hundred thousand men were lod
By one calf near throe centuries dead.
$
Tho miners had no desire to be
drowned, neither did they wish to
give up their gold.
"Get him aboard, captain," said
their leader, " and we'll have a fight
for it. We are all heeled, and ouoe
we get that villuiu and part of his
crew on deck here, you keep out of
the way if you like, aud we'll handle
him."
"Yon couldn't run down that pirate,
I suppose?" suggested another, more
cautious than tho rest.
"No more than I could run down
Queen Charlotte's islands with this
craft," roplied the captain dolefully.
"Time!" shouted the man on the
bridge.
"We'll give you the gold," said the
captain, returning to his place.
"All right. Aud so that there will
be no temptation to play us any tricks,
for the amount I understand is demor
alizingly large, I will stuy here aud
receive your packages. Two of my
men will go aboard you, and two
others will work the ferry between
your craft and mine. Those four men
I can easily spare, and if you kill or
capture them you are welcome to do
so, but in that case I shall undoubted
ly sink the ship. If you will think
over the crisis for a moment you will
see that nothing else is left for me to
do. It is the only safe plan; therefore
I trust therp will be no trouble."
There wasn't. The miners saw at once
that there was little use in making a
row, and iu a short time the precious
cargo was transferred from the ship to
the yacht. It came in boxes aud bags,
in large quantities and in small, and
the man on the bridge opeued every
package ho that there was no chance
of fooling him. When the transfer
was complete the young man sang
out: .
"I wish you good day, captain, aud
a safe voyage. It may strike you as
strange that I do not sink the ship
now and so destroy all evidence
against me. I assure you that I gave
the plan the deepest consideration,
aud if, unfortunately, one life had
been lost, you would all have gone to
the bottom, but, as it is, this is only
robbery or piracy, and I believe they
don't hang for that now, so I chance
your evidence against, me, for I will
be disembarked long before you can
reach the nearest telegraph office. 80,
if I were you, I would plug right along
to San Fraucisco and not give me the
trouble of calling at Victoria or auy of
those intervening ports. Well, so
long,"
The yacht moved away from the
ship at a speed which showed that all
hope of keeping her in sight for long
was hopeless. With sad hearts the
plundered passengers watched her
grow smaller aud smaller to the south
of them, while the Bear churned her
leisurely course through tht. waveless
sea.
At last the lookout shouted:
"The yacht's coming back, Bir."
The captain put his glasses to bis
eyes uud gazed for a long time at the
horizon to the south.
"By jingo, she is," he said, turning
a tritle less ruddy. Then ho said to
the mate, "Wbat do you think of it?"
"He's probably changed his mind
and is going to siuk us. I thought he
didu't seem to be more than half con
vinced when he talked of not doing it.
What are we to do?"
"I don't know anything to do,"
said the captaiu hopelessly, swearing
inwardly that if he escaped he would
have a faster steamer next voyuge or
quit the high seas.
Everyone aboard was now wutehing
the northern bound yacht, uud the
same disquieting thought seemed to
run through every mind, eveu before
one of the passengers gave voice to
his fears. Suddenly the captaiu cried
out with his glasses still to bis eyes:
"So help me! It's not the same
yacht. Look, Joe!"
The mate examined the approach
ing steamer aud coincided with the
cuptaiu's view. Soon ull doubt was
set at rest. The oncoming bout was
seen to be much lurger than the yacht
aud uppureutly much faster, speedy as
the other had seemed iu comparison
with the Russian Bear. A big bluck
beurded giaut with a voice like a fog
horn was iu command. He wasted 110
time iu tulk, but sent a shot towards
the Bear, a shot that skipped along tho
water aud sank without coming within
dangerous distance. Once more the
Russian Bear lowered her Hug, slowed
dowu and stopped. The other cume
up with her.
"We want what gold you have on
board," roared the man with the whis
kers. "We haven't any," replied the cap
taiu; "we've been "
"I know better. You have 83,000,
000 worth of the stuff with you aud
p
Hy LUI-CE SHARP. ss
8
I'll havo it without any more nonsense.
I'm not running a moonlight excur
sion with a brass band on board.
Surrender, or I'll sink you."
"You're too late. We've been
robbed already."
"Oh, that's too thin. Every man
hold nphis hands; we're going to lay
alongside aud the man that moves gets
shot."
'You're wasting valuable time,"
said the captain, "coma round to the
other side ami see the shot he put
through us, if you don't believe me.
We don't get such marks as this en
moonlight excursions, either."
"Here's the shot that came through
the side," corroborated the mate, hold
ing it up in his hands. All 011 bonrd
cried aloud that this was true, and the
pirate made au emphatic remark re
garding his future destination, which
was as likely as not prophetic.
"Didn't you meet a rakish-looking,
black-hulled yacht about half the size
of your own?"
"Yes, and it seemed to mo at the
time she sheered off and showed that
she didn't want to be hailed. But as
we didn't, either, I took no notice.
Thuuder! I can overhaul her before
she reaches port. Any idea whore she
was making for?"
"No, but as her master advised mo
not to drop into Victoria, I suspect he
iutends to run iu there himself."
The pirate circled the Russiau Bear,
and the captain thereof saw him exam
ining the hole made by the cannou
shot through his glass. Evidently
conviuced, ho rang full speed ahead,
shouting back to the Bear: "If you've
fooled me, I'll settle with you later."
No one slept on the Russiau Bear
that night. She veered toward the
west and a keen lookout was kept till
morning broke. She fancied they heard
cannon firing in the distance, but no
one was sure. Toward evening of the
next day the outlook aloft shouted that
there was something to the sonthwest
ward, and tho Bear's course was laid
in that direction. They came upon
the yacht with one mast standing, on
which flew a signal of distress. The
smokestack and tho other mast were
gone, and the yacht lay helpless, with
her prow high and her stern omin
ously low in tho water. Men were
pumping with feverish industry.
"Yacht ahoy!" cried the captain of
the Bear. "Where'B the other fellow?"
"You ask no questions and you won't
be disappointed with the answers. I
am ready to make a fair bargain with
yon, captaiu, if you nre.
"Well, you don't look in condition
to drive a very hard one."
"Oh, I'm iu better shape than you
think. We're good for two or three
hours yet. You proposed to call this
a joke aud I'm ready to do so now.
We'll put the treasure back on your
old tub aud you give us safe passuge
to port and no questions asked or
answered whon we go ashore. We're
miners from Klondike, we are."
"That's compourding with piracy,"
objected the captain.
"Oh, no, it isn't. You 6aid your
self It was a joko. Of course we were
merely going to port to wait till you
came. Anyhow, we're not going back
empty to got into prison, you can
make up your mind on that poiut. Wo
stop pumping and dowu she goes, gold
and all."
The passengers implored the captain
to let bygones be bygones as long as
the gold was recovered. The safety
of the gold was his duty, they said.
"All right, "cried the captaiu. "You
put the gold aboard just as you took it
off. Then each man must come -on
deck sopuratcly aud must submit to be
put in irons. I must insist on that
for the safety of the ship. I'll lot you
free as soon as we are tied up at the
wharf."
Each passenger swore he would not
inform on the pirates, aud when all
the gold was once more ou the ship,
together with tho prisoners, the old
Boar moved slowly ou while the yacht
disappeared stern foremost. And be
cause the passengers and crew all kept
their oat lis, this murine incident never
got into the papers until now, Detroit
Freo i'ress.
Women tn the Ilank of France.
As the result of long and careful ex
periment, the Governor of the Bauk
of France has now intrusted the work
of detection of forged bank notes aud
of debentures with altered numbers
entirely to a special corps of women
clerks. Ho declares that the keen
sensibility of their finger tips enables
them in bundling a note to distinguish
tho difference, however slight, betweeu
the forged and the real urticle. The
means adopted for bringing to light
the falsified numbers ou debenture
are rather more elaborate, and consist
mainly iu the distinction of the dif
ference iu the symmetry of tho figures
uud of the ink used, magnifying
glasses being used for the former aud
chemical preparations for the latter.
Uuoy to Lot-ato Munkeu Ve.ael..
A. J. Cursou, a commercial travelei
liviug iu Kulamuzoo, Mich., has pat
ented a device to prevent foundered
vessels from being completely lost.
His idea is to place abuoyou the deck
of the ship in such a position that when
the vessel sinks the buoy is freed aud
stays ou the surface. A long steel
rope is connected with the buoy. Tht
rope pusses through a hole in the deck
uud is wound around a reel iu the hold
of the ship. This reel is mounted ou
ball-bearings and the hole through
which the rope pa. ses is similarly
equipped to prevent friction and avoid
the danger of entangling. After the
vessel reuches the bottom the buoy
will serve as a means of locating thf
wreck.
Kalli-Froof loor.
Ruiu cannot force itself under the
bottom of a door or window frame just
patented which hasaHunge iu the bot
tom of the frame with the front of tht
step lower than the buck, the door be
ing beveled to fit it tightly.
TnEMEUUYSIDKOFLIFE.
STORIES THAT ARE TOlV) BY THE
FUNNY MEN OF THE PRESS.
A Word I'lrture The Martyr D.uil.le
Quantity ltnlibr.1 It In A ItcnMty
!' Too (Intra For llllii-llolnc.lfn
Hrp.rl.-e PrnHiiK with Fate, Etc.
A sudden r.-iln, a road of elny,
A leak that's sure though slow;
A tnimu just twenty miles nwnv
How's that for wheel and woe?
ltochester Uulou und Advertiser.
The Martyr.
' "Yonr husband seems to bo a vic
tim of tho tobacco habit."
1 "No; I'm the victim. Ho thorough
ly enjoys it."
III. Winli.
"Which would you rather bo, Hur
grenves, rich or handsome?"
"I'd like to be rich, also." Cincin
nati Enquirer.
Iliirncd TI11-111.
Kitty "What did she dowiththoso
adoring lovo epistles ho wrote?"
Jack "She simply made light of
tuem. Up-to-L)ate.
A Double Quantity.
Boarding School Teacher "And
now, Edith, tell ns the plural of ba
by" Edith (promptly) "Twins."
The l.ornlll-.
"Are you in pain, my littlo man?"
asked tho kind old man.
'No," answered tho bjy. "TUe
pain's iu me." Indianapolis Journal.
OotneMlc Repartee.
Mrs. nenpock "The proof of the
pudding 13 iu tho eating. '
Mr. Honpeck "Tho proof of those
you muke is 111 tho post-mortem."
Life.
Fencing Willi Fnte.
Ho (cautiously) "If I should pro
pose, would you say yes?"
She (more cautiously) "If you
knew I would Bay yes would you pro
pose?" Itubl.rd It In.
Judge "Why did you knock this
man down? Did he Bay you were a
liar?'
Prisoner "Worso'n that, sub; he
proved it."
It All Depend..
She (sweetly) "Do yon believe that
kissing is unhealthy?"
He (cautiously) "Well, I or is
your father at home this evening?"
Chicago News.
Lacked Interest.
"We let our typewriter girl go."
"What was the trouble?"
"Why, she didn't take enough in
terest iu the bus.'ioss to pry iuto our
private letters. " Chicago Record.
A Man of Life.
Mother "Edith, go and see whether
the clock is going!
Edith (coming back) "No, mamma,
it is standing quite still, only its tail is
wagging a little." Enquire Within.
Too Quick Fnrlliul.
Mrs. Bacon "Did yon offer Mr.
Crimsonbeuk your umbrellu when ho
went out?"
Mr. Bacon "No; I didu't have a
chance; he took it."-Yonkers States
man. A lleu.tly Hllp.
Mrs. Mashem "My dog aud I have
beou sitting for our photographs as
'Beauty aud tho Beast.' "
Lord Loreus (u bit of a fancier)
"Yes; he certainly is a beauty, isn't
he?" -Punch.
A Fugitive.
The Editor's Assistant "Hero's
some fugitive poetry, left to-day."
The Editor "By whom?"
Tho Editor's Assistant "A fugitive
poet. I rau him out with a shotgun."
Cincinnati Commercial Tribune.
Neui. Con.
First Lawyer "You are a shyster!"
His Opponent "Aud you aro a
blackguard?"
The Court "Now, gentlemen, lot
us get at the disputed points in the
ease." Philadelphia North Auioric.au.
Woman'. Fort ion.
"In marriuge," snid tho old bach
elor, as he mentully figured ou the oost
of it wedding present, "u woman gets
everything. "
"Yes," admiltul thu old niuid; "sho
even gels the worst of it." Chiougo
Post.
Hare FelU-lly.
She "Such lovely harg.iius as there
are at that new place!"
Ho "Ah?"
H!ic "Yes, silks at eiglitceu cunts,
aud iu a store so small that u hundred
poisons crowd it to suffocation!" De
troit Journal.
Martyr., Indeed.
Young Housekeeper "My good
man, can't you find u more useful life
than thut of a trump?"
Trump "We aro useful, lundaui
just think of the number of divorces
we prevent by eating young house
keepers' pies." Judge.
Oldn't Approve of I lie Feu.t.
The lesson wai from tho prodigal
sou, aud the teacher wus dwelling on
the clim ucter of tho elder brother.
"But amid ull tho rejoicing," he
uuid, "there wus one to whom the
preparation of the feust brought no
joy, to whom tho prodigal's return
guvo no pleasure, but only bitterness;
one who did not approve of the feast
being held, uud who hu I 110 wish to
attend it. Now cuu uuy of you tell
me who this was?"
There was a breathless tileuce, fol
lowed by a vigorous e-iicluug of
thumbs, uud thou from u dozen sym
pathetic little geniuses culm) the chor
us:
"Please, i it was tho fulled calf 1"
Aberdeeu J lul.
SCIENTIFIC AND INDUSTRIAL.
A stroug microscope shows the sin
gle hairs of tho head to be like coarse,
round rasps, but with teeth extremely
irregular and jugged.
Tho oyster is ono of the strongest
creatures on earth. The force re
quired to open au oyster is more thnu
nine hundred times its weight.
The sole of the English coast when
wlWn placed over a gravelly bottom,
wilnot ouce assume tbnt shape to a re
markJide degree. Placed iu a white
bowl it iVeeoiiios almost as white as th
dish.
In FrauceVt is a punishable offense
for anyone to rivo infants under one
year any form tiNsolid food unless such
bo ordered by written proscription
signed by a logullyNouulitied medical
man.
Beanmr says that eab thread ol
what we call a "spider weP" is com
posed of nbout five thousand separate
fibres, and that it would tako 7,01H
full-grown spiders a year to spibi a
pound of such Bilk.
The summer rout of tho polar fox ipJ
nam, 111 general Harmony witn the
ground of the rocky Arctic regions,
whore the sun has molted off tho snow.
In whiter it is bo white thut it can
hardly be seen as it runs over the snow.
Moro than six thousand species of
plants nre cultivated, and most of
these havo been broken up into varied
forms by the baud of man. Horticul
turists create new species and show
numbers of cultivated plants of which
uo oue knows the original form.
Spanning an inlet of the Yellow Sea
near Sutigung, China, is a bridge five
and a quarter miles long, with 300
piors of masonry, and having its road
way sixty-four feet above the water.
This work is said to have beon accom
plished by Chinese engineers HOOyears
ago.
Tho drill of the woodpecker has an
other tool iusido, a sort of insect
catcher. On tho end is a bony thorn
with sharp teeth like barbs 011 a fish
hook. As he works and finds au iu
sect ho opens the drill and sends out
this barbod tongue aud draws it into
his mouth.
A testing-machine of wonderful
power has recently boon devised for
the Massachusetts Institute of Tech
nology. It is capable of exerting a
pressure of 500,000 pounds. It cau
be applied to testing the strength of a
complete arch of masonry, and it is
said that similar tests on so large a
scalo nave never before beou applied,
An experiment station for what has
been called the "vivisection of plants"
has been established by the Depart
ment of Agriculture in Washington.
Somewhat similar stations exist else
where, but it is said to be the inten
tion to make this moro extensive than
any other. Valuable results are ex
pected from the study of the diseases
of plants, aud it has long been sug
gested that this may lead to the em
ployment of "plant doctors" just as
aow we have doctors for men aud ani
mals. A Hinobelffl. Fuel.
In the future we may be importing
aiasut instead of exporting coal. Musut
is a by-product in tho distillation of
i raw petroleum. It is also manufac
tured from a cheap, brown ooal found
in Saxony. There has been, until re
cently, great trolble, says the Chicago
Journal, iu finding a furnace suitable
for burning it. It is now blown by
steam into a special furnace, on the
principle of the Lucigen light, and
ased without difficulty. It is said to
be forty or fifty per cent, cheaper than
joal, aud is twenty per cent, better as
i heat raiser. Steam can be got up
quicker and kept at a higher pressure
and more work be done by the mach
inery. From a nuvul point of view
those uro vitally important facts. No
sign of a ship under full steam will be
shown in the sky, for musut is a smoke
less fuel. Russiu aud Ituly are using
it iu their navies, and Germany has
lately made some valuable experiments.
At liicl, Williolmshuvou aud Danzig
are tanks from which it cau be pumped
into ships. Jts specific gravity being
so much less than that of coul, a ship's
buoyancy is greatly increased when
the bunkers are filled with it. Heavier
armor or cargoes can be carried. The
beating capacity being grtuter, the
dhip cuu travel fuster or further. It is
yet to be learned what improvements
tho Germans huve introduced iuto
their furnaces und what urn the disad
vantages of musut.
Tlie Truthful t lllien.
The other morning a careless mason
dropped a brick from the second story
of a building on which he was ut work.
Leuuing over the wull uud glancing
downward he discovered a respectable
citizen with his silk hut jammed over
his eyes und ears, rising from a re
cumbent posture. Thu musou, iu
tones of apprehension, inquired: "Did
that brick hit uuyoiie dowu there?
The citizen, with grout difficulty ex
tricating himself from the extinguisher
into which his hut liud been converted,
replied with considerable wrath: "Yes,
sir, it did. It hit me. "flints
right," excluimed the mason, iu tones
of undisguised udmirutiou. "Noble
man, I would rather huve wasted u
thoiisuud bricks than have you tell lue
a lie about it." Buptist Union,
Cyclone'. Fir. ct on Hlcyilc..
It has remained for tho French to
study the resisting power wbioh the
bicycle bus iu a cyclone, uud to pro
duce uu instantaneous photograph of
bicycle uud rider us they appeared
lieu cuught in a furious whirwiud.
During recent tempests a number of
bicyclists were cuught on tho high-
wuys, and, although a few machines
were wrecked, they were of the cheap
est grudes. Bicycles of the best make
showed reiuaikuMe powers of resist
ance. They were bent into ull sorts
if shupes, but they did not breuk.
Y
OPPORTUNITY.
Monarch okeverv humnn belnif. I.
eh oK
lestinv shinties Itself hencnth mv hand.
I rule auibltlois lofty as the sky;
I pavn tho Vrnv for crime's debasing
brands.
I'm king of IwittlX nhd I'm god of lovo
I govern all lielow.Vninl all above.
And once 1 come to evr- "m of ye
That hour your hope i lost or fortune'
made.
Act bravely, promptly, forlie way Is free:
And woe to him who In-siioVcs, afraid!
I hold u one hnuil, hon.y, love and
place; V
And in the other want, linte an rVlKgrBcc;
So, when I come, then may youi cue. see
plain;
For slighted onee, I never come agai.
joun u. l nucrwouu, in lioaiou J in
script.
HUMOR OF THE DAY.
There may bo lots of nico men in tho
world, but the bill collectors don't meet
them. Atchison Globo.
"Did Mrs. Jinks' traveling gowu fit
well?" "Yes, but it cost so much she
had to give up her trip aud stay at
homo." Philadelphia Press.
Mrs. Files "Did you tnke your pet
dog to tho country with you?" Mrs.
Styles "Mercy, 110! Tlio table was
UHiscrablo!" Yonkers Statesman.
'You know what a hatred Brown
has for a crowd?',' "Yes, indeed;
what ofit?" "His wife presented linn
with triplets yesterday." Indianapo
lis Journal.
Mrs. Browii -Jones "I married my
husband for protection." Jones-Brown
"Did you get i(?" Mrs. Browu
Jones "No; I 1idir'Nt even get recipro
city. "Truth.
"Our typewriter gir- is awfully
clover; she cuu sharpen lea 1 pencils."
"Pooh! Ours can beat that. She has
five clerks in tho ollieo dying to idiurpen
thotu for her." Detroit Free wHVess.
Silas Outcuke (who bus just pailrv'be
l.:ll iiv 1.
or two. I reckon you hev this windmill
here to keep people from gittiu' hot
when they pay your confounded high
charges!" Puck.
Solicitor "Yes, madam, we wil
Lave to put down your correct age iu
the deed." Client "Put forty-five,
then, if you must have it, but for
goodness' sake write it as illegibly as
possible." Tit-bits.
Weary Watkins "A man that will
torture a poro dumb beast or to be took
and boiled iu oil." Hungry Higgins
"Boilin' in oil's loo good for 'iin.
He'd orto to bo boilod iu soapsuds."
Indianapolis Journal.
Saddler "That was a wonderful per
formance of Star Pointer's, wasn't it?
I tell you, a milo in less than two min
utes is going pretty fust." Wheeler
"You bet it is. What gear did he
have, I wonder?" Cleveland Leader.
Disappointed Suitor (savagely)
"What's thut, you littlo imp? You
Bay you just overheard your sister tell
me she would be a sister to mo, and
that you aro glad of it?" Small
Brother (meekly) "Yeth thir milh
ery loves company, thir." Judge.
"Dear," said Mrs. Grouch as sho
showed hor lord and master a picture
of a hat with u pretty woman's fuce
under it, "I wish you would get me a
hat like thut." "Ill bo glud to,"
grunted old Grouch, "if you will only
get a face like that." Cincinnati En
quirer. "Whut do it ineun,"suid Miss Miami
Jones, "when dey talk iu dis hero
novel book 'bout or young man pnyin'
his addresses to a young lady?"
Doesn't you know?" exclaimed Erustus
Pinkley. "I sho'ly doesu'." "It
means dut he done put do postage
stamp on do lovo letter." Washington
Star.
"Oh, not at ull," protested the
Turk. "Ask any question you like.
Yes. My trousers? Ob, they nre
ruther large, to be sure, but you
should see the bureiii thut goes through
thein every night ufter I'm asleep."
As for the travelers, they were much
bewildered by the strange things they
were encountering. Detroit Journal.
Tompion "Wus Locke much of a
fighter when ho wus iu the army?"
Hummer "No, hurdly thut. In fuet,
ho managed to keep out of buttle alto
gether. But then, you know, he was
full of fight before ho got to the front,
and he has been full of it ever since
the war v as over. Iu tho nature of
things, a fellow must huve a rest some
time or other." Boston Truuscript.
t.rowtli of Ctlle..
According to recent stutisties con
cerning the populations of towns from
1H00 to lM'.IO, it nppours thut during
thut period tho population bus been
doubled ut Amsterdam, Uirmiughum,
Brussels, Manchester uud Rome. It
bus increased threefold ut Copen
hagen uud Marseilles; fourfold ut
Prugue, Lyons, St. Petersburg, Paris
ami Loudon; fivefold ut Dresden.
Cologne, lireslaii, Hamburg uud
Vietiuu; sixfold at Leeds, Liverpool
and Wursuw; sevenfold ut Shetlield
uud Glusgow; eightfold ut Budapest
und Berlin, uud tenfold ut Baltimore.
But all this is nothing compared to
the growth of New York aud Philu
delphiu, which to day huve twenty
five times the inhabitants they had ut
tho beginning of tho century, or liko
Cliieugo, which bus grown 215-fold,
and Brooklyn, where for every inhab
itant iu 1NU0 there uro now 3:i'J.
F.lweu Incite, of Hand.
Jim Stevensou, a colored mun agod
about tweuty yeurs, residing iu Lex
ington, but who was born ut North
Middlotowu, Bourbon County, bus tho
most enormous bund iu tho world,',
probably, uud ho says ho wus boru
thut wuy. . His right huud is eleven
inches long from me joint of the wrist
to thu end of the middle linger, aud
tho thumb und fingers about four
inches iu circumference. His thumb
null is as big as a half dollar. The
two lust fingers nre of normal size.
The thumb uud index linger of the
left bund are about d able uoruiul
size. Louisville DisuutcU.
r
V.J