THE FOREST REPUBLICAN I published every Wednctdar, hy J. C. WENK. Otlloain Smearbangh & Co.'a Building ELM STREET, TIONKSTA, JTa, Term, . . . Q.po per Year. , tot"eriPns relfa for shorter period thsn thrre months. "" Corr.epondi.nc solicited from til pirtj f the THE SCARECROW. In yonder Hold lio stands erect, No matter what the weather, And keeps watch io circumspect On foe of every feather, Bo faithful Is he to the trust Committed to his keeping That nil the birds suspect ho must Dispense with any .looping. Sometimes his hat tips down so low It teems a cause for censure, For then tome old, courageous crow Bollerrs It snfo to venture; But catching night of cither arm Outstretched iu solemn warning, The crow decides to leave this form Until another morning. Although his dress is Incomplete, It really doet not matter; Forehnnce the truest heart may beat Benratb a patch or tatter. And It is wrong to base our love On wealth and name and station, For he who may will rise above ' Hh daily occupation. We should not look with eyes of scorn, And find In him no beauty Who stands and guards our field of corn, And doe the whale world duty, But honor him for native worth, For rustic independence, And tend a hearty greeting forth For biin and bis descendants. Martha C. Cook, in Young People. A QUAINT PROPOSAL r The lilac bush beneath the south win dow of Willow Brook Farm's wainscot tea parior noaaca gracefully ns a tinv icphyr swept goyly by, wafting far and near its incenso of now mown hay. In Its wako fluttered a purple and golden butterfly, to poise a moment upon the window's ledge, then to soar boldly for ward until it lit upon a curious old vase beside an orgnn, whose yellowed keys gleamed softly in tho half darkened room. The butterfly and the vase mir rored themselves in the polished oak floor, and if tho range bad been right they could have repeated tho pictnro in the shining surface of each articlo of furniture. A young girl was tho sole occupant of the room, with the exception, of course, of tho butterfly, who had winged his way to a small oval mirror and was busily making his toilet, as his companion, humming a merry tune, dusted carefully a squatty teapot, whose fat littlo spout and comic tout ensemble at once inspired longing for tea brewed in such novel quarters. At that moment a voice, call ing "Marthyl Marthy 1" echoed through the house, .followed by: "Run quick old Tim's in the com field, and ray hands are all over dough!" Hastily replacing the ancient heirloom on! a spindle-legged table, the young girl darted from tho room, while the Butterfly, startled at its toilet, spread its brilliant wings and floated swiftly out into the sunshine again. Snatching a snowy sun bonnet from its peg in the hall, Martha flew down the garden path across to an adjacent meadow. In her hurry she failed to notice a gentleman slowly advancing in her direction, until two masculine handB stayed her progress. With an exclamation of surprise, Mar tha raised her pretty blue eyes and met a pair of decidediy good-looking brown ones, gaming with evident appreciation at the dimpled, blushing face, from off which the sun-bonnet had slipped, dis closing a crop of reddish golden rings yingclose to the finely -shaped little head. "ibeg your pardon," murmured Mar tha, the blushes and dimples waxing deeper, "but I didn't see you, I was in such a hurry." "Don't mention it. Wouldn't have missed the the pleasure for anything. 1 I liko to be run into," averred the centlcmnn with considerable emphasis. Such a rippling laugh as bubbled over the lips of Marthu at this speech, which she hastily apologized for with: "I didn't mean to, really ; but what you said sounded so odd." "You couldn't do it again, could you? I assure you I never appreciated being a odd until to-day. I" "Oh, the cow'l" exclaimed Martha, suddenly recollecting her errand. "I forgot all about him," and away the sped, the gentleman hurrying after, repeating: 'Cowl Ilimt Let me help you. I I really am very clever with cows. In fact I would like to make them a study." However, when the Hold was reached no cow was to be seen, and remarking that doubtless some of the hands had ousted old Tim, Martha turned her steps toward the house, thinking the gentle man would proceed on his way. To her astonishment, however, ho kept along by her side, observing: "Are you acquainted at Willow Brook farm?" i "Why, yes; it's my hone. I was born there," answered A'ea'tha, sur- pr.seaiy. I "Happy farm! I mean- must be a lovely place, lou sec,,,. ' fact is that is, I have a note for h 4ncan, of Willow Brook Farm." alpoiA "My mother!" cjacu Martha opening wide her blue ev ,0 , the gentleman scanner? 18-ly:""M,"H awakened interest a squ had extracted from his he added: .ivr in "I am au old I sho ope he Vet, as is an old friend of Mn 'eg a rough calculati BRIDLES, , time it might take, f.. to place him on equa' with the daughte nnnne thoughts ?an very nQ GOODS. "Would be nice 1 so sallow. Woutler him to make us a vi J her speak of an old'-iCAN, only son." lly this time tbey the I'UtU that ltd t V0L.IVIII. NO. 25. rose garlanded porch, find having ushered the gentleman into the parlor we have alrcadv been introduced to, with a de mure little courtesy and the words "I wi.l send mother," Martha left him. In a few moments a comely, rosy cheeked woman came hurrying into the parlor with: "Good afternoon, sir, Martha tolls mo you have a letter for mo from an old friend." "Yes, from my mother," and the gentleman bold toward her tho letter. Having read it through, interrupted with exclamations such ns "Bless me! Who'd lmvo thought it!" Mrs. Dun can, her pleasant face deepening into I smile cjnculatcd : "So you are little Faul Dorsey. My! how time flies. When I last saw you, you were only a littlo shaver. It must bo nigh onto fifteen years ago. And to think of Lucindy's remembering mo all those years and sending her son to see me. Not that I have forgotten her not a bit. Only with cne thing and another one hasn't time to think much of old days. You see your ma and I went to the same academy, and we thought a signt or cicn other; only somehow after both of us married wo sort of drifted apart. Y'our ma she married a wealthy city man, whilo X got wedded to a well to do fanner, and to gradually we each went our own wny. Not to forget euch other though, as you see, and now, my dear, excuse tho liberty, but it comes natural like, being your Lucindy's son. I'll send ono of the men down to tho vil lage after your trunk, and you'll just stop along witn us and be as welcome as my own son, if I had one, and Marthy and I will do our best to make you com fortable," and motherly Mrs. Duncan laid her hand with an approving pat upon l'aui uorsey s slightly stooping should ers, whilo he, coloring somewhat, en deavored to thank her for her warm hos pitality, but was cut shott with: "Bless you. it's no nut out. we have lots of room, tnd it wil be a real vilcasurc to mo to see Lucindy s son making him self to home in my house." And thus it was that Paul Dorsey be came a guest at Willow Brook Farm. J hat evening after her visitor had re tired Mrs. Duncan observing to her uauginer: "Poor young man, he hasn't a bit of appetite. I don't wonder Lucindy Is fretted about him. She writes that he is always that taken up with books, that sho can hardly ever coax him to sto about a bit with young folks and enjoy himself. I've been thinking Marthy, if you was just to kind of make believe you need his help now and again about the garden and such, it would do him a sight of good, and he'd never suspect it was lor mo sane oi nisneaith, and Mrs. Duncan laughed, a low. pleased laugh. at the thought of tho deception, while Martha exclaimed: "Why, mother! you ore getting to be a regular conspirator. But I am afraid it won't work," he's so so odd." Paul Dorsey had been told to make himself perfectly at home: so the morn ing after his arrival he withdrew from the breakfast table to his own room, and lortntvitn commenced to unpack bis books preparatory to a pood dav's studv. Everything was at last arranged to his satisfaction, but somehow his thoughts were strangely wandering this day, al though not a souud disturbed the cool quietness of his surroundings. A pair of blue eyes seemed to glance mockingly from the musty page ho fain would mas ter, and he caught himself repeating aloud the old-fashioned name of "Marthy," which took unto itself the sweetest of sounds by reason of its con nection with so pretty an owner. Sud denly, with a thud, the book fell from his hand, as, exclaiming: "By Jove! that's her voice," Paul Dorsey, with one stride, was at the window making sad havoc of the dainty dimity curtains with clumsy hands. Martha, accompanied by a tall stalwart fellow, was passing down the garden path, her infectious laughter floating merrily upon the balmy air as she chatted away to tho young man at her side, who appeared io bo enjoying the subject under discussion as much as her self. As they disappeared from view l'aui, with rather a blank look, resumed his seat and sought to apply himself to his interrupted task, but not with the old ardor did he work, and for the first time that ho could remember, he lis tened anxiously for the bell to summon him to luncheon. The days slipped into weeks, and still Paul Dorsey remained a guest at Willow BrooK Farm, and it became no unusual sight to see In in obediently following Marthas directions concerning toe up rooting of certain weeds, or the fasten ing of some vine more securely about its support. An honest, bronze- tinge had replaced Paul's onco sallow complexion, and the books well, they had become secondary, a more potent charm having outrivaled them. Mrs. Duncan con gratulates herself upon her happy fore thought that was working such a chango in her friend's son, and Martha admitted with a slight blush, that Mr. Dorsey was gutting to be almost as handsome as her cousin Joe her beau ideal of manly beautv heretofore. The sun burned scorching hot upon the broad gravel path just outside of the farm a pretty parlor, but within that quaint room a restful coolness held sway. Lounging idly in the depths of a willow chair, was Puul, while Martha, seated at the old organ, drew from its aged keys a low, plaintive melody. As the last aote died softly away, whirling round upon her seat, Martha exclaimed : "Do you know, Mr. Dorsey, vou have been wasting the whole morning? I don't believe you have looked at a book for two days' this last, it mutt bo owned, with a slight air of triumph it she c-ontinucd, penitently: "I am afraid I Kave been to blame, but to morrow I will leave you free to spend the whole day with your books, for Cousin Joe has TIONESTA, PA., WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 7. 1885. promised to drive mo over to Daploston to do some shopping." "Hang cousin Joe" "Mr. Dorsey!" from Martha's aston ished lips. "I beg pardon, I really I hope you will have a delightful time, Mis Dun can. I assure you I shall a enjoy it im. monscly being left to my books and confound it! Excusemel " And before Martha could reply, Paul Dorsey had left the room. "How queer it is," soliloquized Mar tha, as Paul's departing footsteps echoed through the hall." "I don't see why be should dislike Joo so; Joe is always such a favorite with every one. I hopo I haven't offended him. I am sure I didn't meat) to." And with rather a puzzled look upon tho fair young face, Martha closed the organ. That evening ns Martha stood down by the meadow gato caressing oil Doxey, the mare, her quick ears caught tho sound of a familiar tread advancing to ward her, and a moment after a voice exclaimed; "I am an idiot, Miss Martha, but I I hope you will forgive me. I couldn't bear the idea of his monopolizing you all day. I know you could never think of an old bookworm like myself still I I have been very happy, and I forget sometimes that that there is such a dif ference between us." Martha's cheeks had been growing rosier and rosier, whilo a strange, wild joy surged through her veins, as she an swered, her tones trembling slightly. "Since I can remember Cousin Joe and I have been playmates, and since father died he has been so good and kind to mother, helping her about the farm and in every way, that ho has become like a son to her, and as dear as a brother to me. Dear Joel I don't know what we should have dono without him." She paused, the tears gathering in her pretty eyes. Paul drew nearer, then hesitated, as Martha continued: "Joe is engaged to my dearest friend, and they are to be married in just six weeks." "I am awfully glad I mean I wish them joy, and all that sort of thing," and Paul Dorsey advanced still nearer the little figure into whose eyes a sweet shyness had stolen. "Martha, do you think there is a ghost of a Chance for me? As it's my first attempt at anything of the kind, perhaps you will sum it up leniently, and make my sentence as easy as you "can," then gathering courage from Martha's half averted face, and the extreme pink ness of the one visible ear, he laid his hand caressingly upon hers, adding: "Martha, do you think you can forgive me for for loving you?"" "Why should I forgive you for what I have done myself?" came the low answer, followed naively by. "But I did not know it until to-day, when I thought I had offended you." "And and you don't mind mv beinc odd or anything?" stammered Paul, in his excessive joy. "You are not a bit odd." was the in dignant reply ; "I wouldn't have vou anv different," and Martha touched shyly the coat-sleeve in close proximity to her waist, whereupon she Immediately dis appeared from view, and from some where in the region of Paul s waistcoat Socket a muffled little voice might have ecn heard ejaculating: "On, l'aui 1 suppose somebody is look ing?" "1 hope they are," was the audacious reply, succeeded by a second disappear ance on Martha's part. A week or so later a stylishly-dressed. middle-aged lady was sitting tetn-a teto with Mrs. Duncan, who was observing: "Dear me, Lucindy. you've no call to thank me. I had nothing to do with it. Not but what I am real pleased that your son and my daughter should come to gether; but I had no more thought of it than vourself." A slight smile stirred the lips of Mrs. Dorsey as she remarked: "iou are just the same as ever. Mary. Well, if Martha only turns out half as good a woman as yourself, 1 am satisfied that Paul has won a treasure." "And he'll never forget, mother, that he owes that treasure to you, for if you had not sent him to seek out your old friend he'd have remained a bachelor to the end of his davs," interrupted a mas culine voice, while a girlish treble ex claimed, "Oh, I'aull" the rest ot the sen tence being forever lost by Paul daringly scaling his betrothed's lips with his own. A Chilian Hero. There have never been but two "hand- to-hand" fights between iron-clads in the history of naval warfare. One took place in Hampton Roads, between the Monitor and the Memmac. as we all know. The other was at Iquique, Peru, between the Peruvian ram Huescar and the Chilian iron clad Ksmcralda. Ad miral Gran, a Peruvian of German ancestry, commanded the former, and Arthur Pratt, a Chilian of English ancestry, the latter. The Hutscar was the swifter and more powerful vessel, and struck the other amidships. As she was sinking Urau struck her again, and as the two vessels came together, Pratt sprang on board the lluescar, with two revolvers, and killed seven or eight men before he was shot down. His vessel, the Esmeralda, with ail on board, went to the bottom of the ocean, and he lay alone on the deck of the victor, sur rounded by the bodies of the men he killed. For this desperate act tho Chillanos have made him their ideal hero, and there is a monument to his memory in nearly every town. Streets and rhops. saloons, mines, opera houses and even lotteries are named in his honor, and the greatest national tribute is to destroy the custom house in order to erect Lis monument in the most con spicuous place iu the principal city. CVO A CHINESE JIACE COURSE. RZKiXXlBLB 8CZXTE3 AKOZTO TEB AXMO&TD-XTED OBIEHTALS. Coins; io the Rare In Qni-r Vehicle The t'oollo Carrier Queer Horace and Jockey. Tho Hong Kong race week is one of those rare occasions when the Chinese come out of their swarming ant hills, habit tally so difficult of penetration to strangers. On the afternoon of the cup day tiie broad, handsome main road is taken possession of for miles by a swiftly circulating mass of chattering, pig tailed and most uncanny looking Chi nese, with their equally strange looking vehicles the light covqred armchair, carried by bamboo poles on the should ers of two coolies, and the rickshaw, a two-wheeled vehicle with a pair of shafts, between which is placed not a horse, a mule, a pony, or even a donkey, but one of those unceasingly toiling Chinese. "Lickshaw, lickshaw'l" they cannot manage our "r" shout half a dozen eager competitors to the English man. Tho rows of rickshaws, about three deep, every ono nt a brisk trot, with not an inch interval in front, behind, or on one side, are kept rigidly in their places by tall, stalwart policemen, Eng lish. or Sikhs, stationed along the route; and if any driver or horse one and the same in the present case dares to de viate from the prescribed line, the policeman, with great tact and sagacity, instantly steps forward and whacks him not taps him. but showers down heavy whacks on the offender's hollow-sounding, shaven skull. But we must not lose sight altogether of a very important element in the throng, the sedan chairs. These arc more suitable for the staid elderly ladies. Tho bearers, two, or if tho weight of the lovely burden should try tho sup porting bamboo poles four in number, shuffle rapidly and unweariedly along, and the occupants, perched high in the air, endeavor to look dignified, but only succeed in appearing supremely absurd. Their coolies, if in private employment, sro habitually clad in light, bright cot ton liveries barefooted of course and the effect is thoroughly Oriental and rather pretty. There, I see, is the chair belonging to the establishment of the governor of the colony. It is born by four coolies in our brilliant national scarlet uniform, and this dazzling color, in the midst oi the CHinese green, yel low, and blue, really looks very impos ing, mere is a different sort of a chair, carefully covered and closed around with straw lattice work. It veils from public view some Chineso beauty of high degree. Soldiers under the rank of sergeant are forbidden by garri son order to travel in rickshaws. The Europeans are only as units among thousands. True, the natives, high and low, rich and poor, afoot or transported, will instantly shrink aside at the incessant warning. "Hyah," of the running coolie, who thus intimates that he is conveying an Englishman, but the enormous majority of the streaming throng is, of course Asiatic Chinese. The route is lined with palms, with banyan trees, and with bamboos, and the red, fever-causing, disintegrated granite dust flics up into our faces. Up go the umbrellas. Up hill, and my trotting coolie never flags; down hill, and his speed becomes so breakneck that every moment I expect an upset, a collision, or a smush, irrespective of the contingency of broken bones to a few English foot travelers, who would scorn to move out of the way for any number of Chinese cries of "Hyah." Here we aro at the entrance to the grand stand. A payment of about f 5 procures admission to the lawn, and once more the strangeness of the scene seems for a time to baffle any systematic observation, however painstaking. In lieu of stands are some seven or eight large mat houses, light, picturesque structures, supported on bamboo poles. witn sides and roots ot rushes, and deco rated with tropical evergreens and bright cloth or calico, the effect of which is ex cessively pretty. Each mat house is the property of some'ie private individual or of an assocu -id tho refresh ments provided aro so costly aud abund ant that tho imputation of excessive eat ing and immoderate drinking can scarce ly bo resented. Tho race crowd, without which a race meeting is as dull as a German steeple chase, is of largo proportions, with rep resentatives of nearly every Asiatic state, but, of course, Chinese enormously pre ponderate. Nearly all are chattering, and quite all are in high good humor, enjoying the general sense of holiday. Not a single case of drunkenness did I see no bickeiing, no rowdyism, and yet no lack of fun. The saddling bell rings, tho numbers are hoisted, a i.hud of hoofs announces the preliminary canter. Well, what of the racing? Beneath criticism, almost beneath contempt. The ponies aro from Australia, Jap-an or Chefoo doubtless serviceable for the work of their respec tive countries, but as racers, wretched, weedy, groggy, undersized brutes; while the jockeys are the paraphernalia of their business, the preposterous length of their legs, their heavy weights, their horse coping idiosyncrasies, and their indifferent riding. I bought a very average type of racer for 0 Ids. In fact, the sport is merely a peg on which to hang the love of gambling, which, like the lovo of drink, runs very high in this part of the world. Innumerable and high prize lotteries are started, and three legged screws are merely bought and entered on the off chance of winning the stakes, which, in addition, are very considerable. . While pondering on the scene, my at tention is suddenly aroused by au un wonted hum, bustle aud excitement among the Chinese mob. A race is in course of being ruo, but to this incident they are habitually very inditlereut. (1 . (I . $1.50 PER ANNUM. Something unusual is certainly arousing them. Here comes the horses. How queer the jockeys look, how strangely they aro hunched up, how wildly they throw theiar arms about, how fiercely they flog, what diabolical faces and, bless my heart, why, they have got pig tails streaming In the wind! The puz zle is explained. It is a race ridden under special arrangements by Chinese "mafoos" or grooms tho best race of the meeting, tho only ono which has caused any real enthusiasm. Roused by the half laughter, half-cheers, of their white mas ters, stimulated by tho cries of their fel low countrymen "Go it, Fordham!" I once heard an encouraging Chinese lad shout tho mafoos, as they "finish" up thoir Walpurgis rido, wild with excite ment, seem to have lost still further their semblance to humanity, and to bo trans formed' into distorted -visaged, hoiribly frenzied demons. Tho race over, how they strutted about in all the pride of jockey caps and jackets, and how they clung to their costume to the last possi ble moment? The tenants of the numerous mat-fashioned grand stands belonging to the higher class natives have become very jubilant and vivacious in consequence of the above-described race, and I avail myself of an opportunity to enter one tenanted chiefly by Chineso and Japan ese ladies. I must confess that my bash fulness compelled mo to retreat after a Very fow moments from the battery of their half -wondering, half-scornful glances at tho European intruder, but not before I had time to remark that their faces were flushed all over with skilfully applied pink tints, excepting in patches, which revealed disagreeably even and in tensely opaque whiteness. Theireyebrows were penciled into narrow stiff arches; their headdress, vests and trousers for in China all the women wear large, loose trousers were of variegated colors, quite ingenious in their contrasts and brightness; their black hair was dragged back into lumpy, slimy rolls like jelly fish; their stature was ugly and stunted, and their feet, their extraordinary feet, in many cases had been contracted since childhood into mere deformed knobs, hideous to look at, on which they pain fully tottered for a few yards. A wide detour round a ditch brings us into the very thick of China race course dregs. Gambling booths for large sums, gambling booths for small sums, gam bling booths for nick-nacks, gambling booths for high-triced drinkables, gam bling booths for low-priced carrion ; each booth with an eager throng of both sexes and of all ares around it, which renders circulation difficult. What is this fragrant and vet some what sickly smell, a mixture of burning spins ana sandal wood, emanating from some of the closed chairs conveying home the Chinese ladies? It is duo to the joss bucks, in consuming which, they utilize their leisure moments, an exercise which they consider as equivalent to an act of worsmp. Rapidly, yet steadily, the pedestrian. the sedan chair, and the rickshaw lines of wayfarers stream into the ordinary. quiet town, just beginuitig to glitter with gas jets from the English lamp posts those ubiquitous lamp posts whicn, in common with the gallows, may now be regarded as the Bymbol of advancing civilization. London Cornhil' A Story About Ferdinand Ward. George P. Lathrop tells In the St. Louis Pott-Dispatch the following story about ward, tne notorious ISew York financier, now an inmate of Ludlow street jail in that city: A wealthy resident of some prosperous rew England city called on ward ono uay witn a note oi introduction from a mutual friend. In the course of conver sation he remarked that he had some money to invest, and asked Ward if ho couldn't tell him of some chance to put it where it would bring a good margin of profit. AVard said that he didn't know of ony thing just then. He himself had more money than he knew what to do with, and besido, ho was too busy with some big scheme of his own to go into any outside speculation. Of course, this only whetted the New England man's appe tite for investment, aud in the course of half an hour ho induced the famous finan cier to accept his check for $j8,000, to bo used in ono of the "blind pools" of which Grant & Ward made a specialty. Three or four months later the New England man appeared again. By that time Word had entirely for gotten him and his check and it was with great difficulty that ho could recall his name and the amount of his iavestment. "I believe there's something due youi" he said, after a brief convention. Tak ing down a large ledger ho made some brief calculations, and then observed with a pleasant smile: "The amount credited to you on our books is $102, 704." Then to the bookkeeper: "Mr. Jones, will you kindly draw a check to Mr. Perkins' order for $103,754?" Ward calmly turned to his work again, while his visitor sat gasping for bieuth. In the language of the day the visitor was "paralyzed." It was some time be fore he could control himself sufficiently to ask if there wasn't any chance for him to reinvest his money and double it again; but Ward didn't seem anxious, and at last the stranger took his depar ture, got his check certified at the Marino bank, and returned to his native town. Three days after he walked into Ward's office in company with four of the wealthiest of his townsmen. He had his certilied check the same one Ward had given him in his pocket, and his friends were supplied with checks of their own. They succeeded in inducing the finan cier to accept about $3r0,000 for in vestment in another "blind pool." That was exactly one week before the failure of Grant & Ward. A kind word may often outweigh in roal worth the wealth of the universe. RATES Or ADVERTISING. One Sqoare, one Inch, one In.ertlon., ........ 1 1 00 One Square, one Inch, one month............ 00 One Square, one Inch, three month.......... t 00 One Square, one Inch, one year. ............. 10 N Two Square, one year II 00 Quarter Column, one year. M 00 Half Column, one year M 00 One Column, one year , IN M Ifeal adTertlaemenU tea ceo I. (,er line eaeb, la tertioa. Marriage and death notice gratia. All bill for yearly edrerttaemantf tolleeted qur. terlr. Temporary advertlaeimeate moat be paid la adrane. Job work eajh on dallTery. A POOR TO UNO UTAH TO HIS OIAL. A jewel rare are you, dear Anne, But can you use a frying pan? Or get a meal for a hungry man? Oh, I will wed you if you can, Sweet Annel Tour dainty fingers wield a fan, But can they wash a pot or pan? Sweep, bake and brew? Oh, if they can, I am, in truth, the very man, Sweet Anne? Toa work in Kensington, fair Anne, Play, ting and dance, but If you can Well mend my tocki, none other than Myself can worship like this man, Sweet Annel Life. HUMOR OF THE BAY. A big diamond The baseball field.- Life. "Stick to It," as the fly-paper observed to the fly. Graphic. Guns are only human, after all: They will kick when the load becomes ton heavy. Mercliant- Traveler. "I catch on," was probably what the fish said when he took the baited hook. "He weighed five pounds," was proba bly the lie told by the fisherman. De troit Free Preu. Dude "You love me then, Miss Lydia?" Lydia "Love is perhaps some what too much to say. At least I have sympathy for you, becauso your face re sembles so much that of my poor dead Fido." Some Eastern poetess asks the conun drum: "Oh, where does beauty linger?" Our office hours are from eight to six ; mornings, noons and evenings generally at home, or out walking with the family. Peck'$ Sun. Little Bess to gentleman caller: "You ain't black, are you, Mr. M ?" "Black, child? why no, I should hopo not. What made you think I was?" "Oh, nothia','copt pa said you was awful nig gardly." 'Burlington Free Prest. Some one says "only one woman in a thousand can whistle." Every once in a while during tho heated term, and when the whole world looks dismal and dreary, some bright ray of hope descends to cheer the hearts of men. General Washington went fishing at least once. And on that occasion he caught a trout at least four inches long. While down at the corner grocery in the evening, after returning from his angling tour, he was asked how much the trout weighed, when ho uttered those memor able words, viz. : "I cannot (ell a lie. It weighed seventeen and a half pounds." Norr into ten Herald. She'd a lovely little pug With a very ugly mug; And she nursed it, and she coddled it, and kissed it: She said It was to tweet It was good enough to eat: But, alas! one day it happened that sho missed it. She hunted everywhere, And she advertised, but ne'er Did the more set eyes upon that canine whiner; " , But at last the traced its fate, And found, cruel to relate, He'd been eaten by a laundryman of China. Boston Gazette. It is said of the Boston girl who got lost up in the Catskills the other day that she shouted in an intellectual tone of voice: "I require assistance from some honorable man of culture and refine ment." When the farmer who found her was leading her back to thu hotel she asked him if he was srul-.c sub scriber to the Atlantic Monthly, and if he had read "Natural Laws of the Spiri tual world." And when ho said "No," she 'forgot to thank him for his assist ance. Aea York Mail. THS LOCUST'S VATS. A low locust sat in a high locust tree, And he tang to bis mate, "Zeesee, zeezee: It's many year since- I've toeu the bright tun; It's many a year since I've had any fun; And, my dear, U I don't paint everything red, - It will be zee tee Now you tee, zee tee, Because every green loaf in the country is dead" But a sparrow sat up in the tame locust t:ee; And much oftener cussed than the locust was he. And he said to hit mate, "There's a bug over there Such a nice little nr.orsel for a fond loving pair; Just wait here a minute, and I'll take the boy in. Now dou't Blip chip-chip Ain't he Hip cbip-cliii f" And when they were through there was left but a siiin. Washington Star. Greenbacks. "Old Greenbacks," was the soubriquet given to Secretary Chaso iu the army, from the green ink with which the backs of tho United States paper money was. printed. This ink was invented by Stacy J. Edson, and patented in 1857, as anti photographic. It could not be photo graphed on account of its color, and could not be dislodged by alkalies by the counterfeiters to get a complete fac simile of the bills, aud as it was a secret known only by tlw American Bank Note company and the inventor, it was im possible to counterfeit the greenback money. It was used by many banks be fore the war, but was "never a leading feature in the bill; but even if the com position of the ink had been known, it would have been of no use, at the work could not be copied from the genuine bills with any kind of ink. The date of tho patent could be seeu on all the bills, in small print. Old General Spinuer wanted to huve Congress enact a law making the counterfeiting of national notes a capital offence, a was once the case in Great Britain, aud to havo them bear the legend which hud been on the bills then issued by the Bank of Eug- lanu: io uouuterieit is Ueath." Hem PrUy Poor.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers