1hc forest gqmMiran. a ruin. mi i:i kvkuy wkdnfjuday, bt OrriOE IS ROBrSBON k BONNEtt'S BUILDIKQ ELM BTSEET, TIOSEST A, PA. TERMS, tl.60 A IEAIU No Subscriptions received for a shorter porlod than throe months. Corroxpondcnoe solicited trotn alt parts nftho country. No notice will bo taken of anonymous communication. Itatos of Advertising. Onflqnare (1 Inch, )ono Insertion - ft OneHquaro " ono mouth - - 3 00 OnoNquaro " three months - u 00 One Square ' ono year - - 10 00 Two Squares, ono vcar - - hr r0 quarter Col. ....- ;io ( 0 Half " - M) 00 One 100 00 Legal notices at established rates. ; Marriage and death notices, gratis. All lulls for yearly advertisements col lected quarterly. 'Temporary advertise ments must te paid for in advance. Job work, Cash on Delivery. VOL. XII. NO. 13. TIONESTA, PA., JUNE 18, 1879. $1.50 Per Annum. iTffffiriitr Two Fishers. One morning, when spring waa In her teens A morn to a poet's wishing, All tinted in delicate pinks and groom -Miss Bessie and I went fishing. I in my rough and easy clothes, With my lace at the tun tan's mercy; She with her hat tipped down to her nose, And her nose tipped vice versa. with my rod, uiy reel and my-hooks, , And a hninmer for lunching recesses She with the bait of her comely looks, And the seino ol hor golden tresses. So wo sat us down on the sunny dike, Wliero the white pond-lilies teeter, And 1 went to fishing like quaint old Ike, And she like Simon Peter. All the noon I lay in tho light ot her eyes, And dreamily watched and waited ; lint the Huh were cunning, and would not riso, And the baiter tilonu was bailed. And when tho time lor departure came, My Ixife hung flat as a flounder; lint licssie had neatly hooked hor gnmo A liundred-aiid-flfty-jounder. Harper' Weekly. A SLIGHT MISTAKE. " I declare,'' said Lydia Collins, who had taken up the morning paper, "Sidney West has come home." She seemed to be deeply moved, and various weie the shades that chased each other over her fair f-.ce. " And has Frank come with him?'' asked Nellie, with an eager look and tone. "I don't know anything about Frank,'' returned Lydia, with a toss of the head that had some contempt in it. "Only the names of those who have brought home money with them are printed. You can look for yourself." Nellie took tho paper, and saw that Sid ney T. West had brought home eighty thousand dollar. Below this she saw a list of pnssengcis, and in it she found tin namo of Frank West; but there was no mention made of hi having brought hone any money. "Frank has coiup," she cried, in glad tones. " Well, suppose he has? Of course yon do not mean to renew the old intimacy.'' "I should like to see him, at all events," replied Nellie, and then she went on read ing the pajer. ' Lydia and Nellie Collins were filters ; the former being twenty-eight years of age, a id the latter ix years younger. Their fither, who had been at one time quite :i nourishing merchant, had been dead u num ber of years, and the sis'trs livd with thei; mother in a fine house and in afashionabh part of the city. Mrs. Collins was natural ly a good woman ; but fashion had turned her head somewhat, and she thought more o" having her daughters move in select cir cles than she did of surrounding them with h islthful influences. But there was a vast difference between the dispositions of thesr two daughters. Nellie had hejjn her fuhcr's pet, Hiid had drawn from him a fund of sound sense and reason which her a'ster had failed to obtain, and which did not leave her when her father was taken away. There was a deep current of hu manity of natural, grateful love under lying her whole neture, and even her dieming, fashionable sister resjiected her f r it, though he probably had no real conception of why this respect was .called forth. It was generally supposed that Mrs. Col lins was wealthy. She owned the house in which she lived, and it was known that her husband had left her considerable money. Sidney and Frank West wejre cousins, p.nd had once been clerks in the employ of Mr. Collins. Three years previous to the opening of our story they went to Califor nia to "seek their fortunes,'' and had now returned, as we have seen. One evening, as Mrs. Collins and her two daughters were alone, Sidney and Frank were announced. They were cheerfully admitted, and warmly welcomed. Sidney was a tall, dashing-locking fellow, five-and-thirty years of age, dressed in the height of fashion, and Hashing with costly jewelry. His "cousin was Some years younger, and 'dressed very plainly. Frank was by far the most intelligent, though he lacked "sty Id." In fact, he was rather common place in his manners and conversation, de fending more upon the substance of what he did and said than upon the show he could make. But Sidney blazed and flashed away like a pyrotechnic b.ittery, and he was not long in Snrapturing Lydia and her mother- Frank and Nellie finally drew together upon one of the tete-a-tete, and there enjoyed a conversation by themselves. " I must secure that man !" said Lydia, after the visitors had gone. " What," returned her sister,' with some surprise, " do you mean Kidney West?" ' " Indeed I do." " You cannot do such a thing, Lydia. Are yoii not engaged to Charles Adams?" " No indeed I am not." " But you have given him every en couragement." " I may have done so while he was the best match that offered," returned Lydia, with a toss of her head,, " But 1 have Ikhmi very" guarded in my conversation with him. 1 have made him no promises.'' " But," pursued Nellie, with a troubled look, you nave given him every encourage ment, and 1 know that he loves you, and thinks you mean to be his wife." " And do you think I would give my hand to a poor clerk, wl.Vn such a prize as this is within my grasp?" said Lydia, with much warmth. " You should not. call Charles Adams a poor clerk," said Nellie, reproachfully. " He has a salary of two thousand dollars a year, and will soon go into business on his own account. You know he has con tided to you a statement of all his pecuni ary tdans and prospects." " Yes so he has,'' retorted the elder sis ter ; and if he ever succeeds in business, it faust lie some years first, during which ime his wife must be helping him save. No, no none of that for me, while a hus band is within my grasp who is already independently rich." " I think," spoke Mrs. Collins, at this point, " that Sidney West offers a very de sirahe match. 1 think he loves Lydia, and would make her a very good husband." " I know he used to love me," said Lydia. "But you returned his love by treating him very coldly," suggested Nellie. "That was when he was only a poor clerk," returned the proud leauty;"but now that he has returned with the" golden fleece of Phryxus, he is quite a different Irson." "He will make a very eligible match," pronounced the lother, with much decis ion. She spoke as though she had made up her mind, and wished to hear no more argument upon the point. And now let me ask you a question," said Lydia, turning to her sister. " You probably remember that Mr. Frank West used have a particular regard for you, andT should judge, from the clumsy man ner in which he deported himself this even ing, that he not only had the same regard now, but that he had some hope of suc ceeding in his suit." " Well," returned Nellie, very quietly. " Would you give him your hand?" " Perhajm so if he should ask me for it." " You would, my child ?" interposed Mrs. Collins. " I should,'' was Nellie's answer. "That is," she added, " if I found him to be what I think he is.' " But, my daughter," resumed the mother, with some show of concern, "you should reflect ujion this. I had hoped that you would give your hand to Edwin Lofton. You know he is wealthy, and is very anxious to gain you for a wife, while this Frank West is probably poor, and not cal culated to rise in the world.'' " How do you know he is poor, mother ?" " I learned to-day that only one of the cousins brought home money. Sydney has been shrewedly speculating, and coining gold, while the other was drudging, as he will probably continue to do." . " Well, mother," returned Nellie, after thinking for a moment, "I shall be gov erned in this by my own sense of what in right and proper. I know that my father always loved Frank, and had much confi dence in him, and I will not deny that I love him.Tven now. With regard to Mr. Lofton, I should never have a husband if he were my only choice. He may le wealthy, but hi character is not good. It Frank is poor, I know he is industrious and persevering, and the few thousand dollars which my father left for me will enable him ot start well in some moderate business." Mrs. Collins changed color, and seemed to be startled by what her daughter hid said; but she soon managed to compose horsi If, though she did not resume the con versation. " Fgad, Frank, I come on gloriously with my charmer!" cried Sidney Wtst, as the two sat in their room at the hotel. "She has promised, to be mine. Only think -he wouldn't even look at me when I went away." " What could have produced the change, think you?" asked Frank. "My manners, sir," retorted Sydney, ppreading himself with a mock show. " I have captivated her. She is willing to be stow her fortune upon me in consideration nl the fine, fashionable husband I shall give her. But I mean to do the handsome thing, Frank ; I mean to be steady, and go into business as soon as I am married." " I hope you will, Sid.," returned the younger cousin. "You have talent and ability, and there is no reason hj you should not prosper." " Thank you. But say how do you come on with Nellie?'' "I have not spoken with her yet that is, not directly," returned Frank, with some hesitation. "Pooh I You're safe enough. She loyrj you she's loved you for years. You'll get a heart, Frank '' "If I get Nellie Collins, I shill .get a true and loving wifej I am sure." " Of course you will." As Sidney thus spoke he looked at his watch, and then arose and went out. In a little while Frank followed his example, and wended his way toward Mrs. Collins's. He found Nellie at home, and went in to spend the evening. They conversed upon various matters until quite late, and then Frank approached the subject that lay nearest his heart. He told Nellie that be could not bear- the suspense longer. He said he loved her as he had never loved an other he had loved her a long time and if she would be his wife he would love her always. Nellie trembled, and it was some moments ere she answered. But finally she looked up, and said, with a warm, generous frank ness : " I must answer you plainly, for my own happiness is as much at stake as yours. Had you asked me this question a week ago I should have had no hesitation in giving my answer. But 1 am not situated now as I then supposed I was." "Nellie, cried the lover, as his com panion hesitated, " what do you mean? You surely love me. Oh yon cannot have given to an" " Stop, Frank," interposed the maiden, with a sudden start, " you misunderstand me. I must tell you the truth 1 must confide to you a secret which L at first re solved that I would never divulge. I only knew it three days ago. You knew that my father left some property ?" "I did." ".And that some few thousand dollars were left for each of his children?" " I had supposed so.'' " Well in an unfortunate moment my mother, who had the use of it all, was led into a speculation by which everything was lost. It all appeared fair and sure to her, and she ran the risk with the firm belief that she should nearly double the property. She lost it all; but she was not to blame. I am sorry, for her sake, for she sutlers much." " And what of this?'' asked Frank, after waiting awhile to see if she would say any more." " Why, it leaves me penniless," returned Nellie. "So much the better," cried the youth, seizing the fair girl by the hand, "for now I can claim you on the ground of love alone. I have already made arrangements for going into business, and I am sure of in come' enough to support us comfortably. Now will you le my wife?" When Prank West went home that night he was as happy as mortal can be. His plans for life were all laid, and he had placed all the scenes of his future in a warm sunlight. "Then you have really consented to lie come his wife?" said Lydia, after Nellie had told her theresultof the interview of the preceding evening. " Yes, sister, I have." "And I think you have done a very foolish thing, Nellie. Since you have dis covered that your money was all lost we had hoped you would look out for a more becoming match." " Since I have discovered it," returned Nellie, with marked emphasis. " What do you mean? Did you know it before?" " Yes, I knew it two years ago." " And never told me ?" "Of course not." " But, Lydia, why should you have kept such an important matter from me?" " Because," answered the elder sister, " we feared you would lie too honest to keep it to yourself. It might have made a vast difference in our prospects, whether we had $10,000 each, or had nothing. We hoped to see you marry with a wealthy husband, and then you wouldn't have missed the money you had lost." "And do you think this was right?' asked Nellie, with a look of concern. "It is deception, and can only lead to evil." " There you go," exclaimed Lydia. " Just as I supposed. You will never succeed in playing the game of life. You will show your hand at the very start." " I have no wish to make a game of my life," said Nellie, with deep feeling ; " and those who do so are full as apt to lose as they are to win. I had much rather take life, with all its duties and responsibilities, as a solemn fact, and try to live it justly and honorably." That's poetical. I must confess though rather of the psalm-tune order," replied Lydia. " But give me the game, especially when I hold the chances in my own hand. I have played, and won." "But you told Sidney that you had no money ?'' " Indeed, Tdidn't do any such thing. He lias money enough of his own. Did you tell Frank?" "Of course I did." . ' Mercy on me what a paragon you have become !'' Nellie turned away, sad and sorrowful, for she feared that evil would come of all this. Sidney West and Lydia Collins were married, and for a while the husband re sided at the house of his mother-in-law. One afternoon, about a month after the first marriage, Neliie gave her hand to Frank. The ceremony had been performed, and the guests had departed, when the happy bride groom asked his bride to accompany him to his home. "But," said Nellie, in surprise, "I did not know that you had taken a house." "Certainly I have, my sweet wife, I would not have a bird iike this without a cage fit to keep her in. Yes come and see it." After the newly-married pair had gone, Mrs. Collins drew Lydia aside and whis pered to her : " My dear, I think you had better speak to Sidney about his business; and also hint to him that we must soon find a new home, or else have the mortgage paid off on this house. You can do it now as well as at anv time." l Won't you do it, mother ?" "No it is your place to do that." " But you will be present?" " Yes. I will do that." The mother and daughter returned to the parlor and sat down. " Sidney, dear," commenced Lydia. " My love my life what?" cried the husband, raising himself to an upright po sition. " I want to .ask you a question." " Ask me a hundred." "It is a very important one, Sidney." " Ask it, love life my charmer." "It is about your businrss, my dear hus band." " Ah the very thing I have long beeii anxious to speak about, my angel. 1 think I ought to go into business soon. I have an excellent opportunity one of the most literal offers. For twelve thousand dollars I can buy out one quarter of a flourishing concern, and for four-and-twenty thousand 1 can have half of it. It is a splendid offer, I assure you." "And do you mean to buy it?" asked Mrs. Collins. " I wish to do so." " Then of course you will," 'suggested Lydia. " Ah that depends upon circumstances,'' replied Sidney. "I am willing to put all my energies and business tact against cap ital, and go it." " I do uot understand you, love." "Then I must speak. plainly," resumed Sidney. " If you will furnish the money, I will do the rest." " Me furnish the money !" uttered Lvdia. " Yes, angel." " But you have money?" " Not enough to pay a month's board, sweet charmer. "But I have tact, and Bless me ! What's the matter ? Have you got a fit ?" "No money!" groaned Lydia, sinking back upon the sofa, and covering her face with her hands. " Do not trifle w ith her feelings, Sidney,'' interposed the mother. " You are cruel. "But 1 have only spoken the truth." " Did yot not bring some eighty thou sand dollars from California?" " No. "Then you have deceived us most cruelly, sir." " But my wife haa money." " Not a dollar." " Are you in earnest?' "I am. What little money we had has been swept away by an unfortunate specu lation." "Then, by heavens!" cried Sidney, "I should say that I had been slightly de ceived. You know that the impression prevailed that you had money, and you knew 1 was aware of the fact that Mr. Collin left over ten thousand dollars to each of his daughters. Why didn't you tell me of thin before?" " Why didn't you tell us that you had no money V" returned Mm. Collins. "Simply because I never professed to have any. " Then what was meant by that account in the paper ?'' " Oho l ' exclaimed the husband. "You got hold of that, did you ? And that ac counts for the peculiar warmth of my le crption I That, it seems, worked the change that gave me the love I sought. I under stand it now. But, upon my word, there was no deception on my part there. When I got ready to start for home, my cousin received a summons to attend to some busi ness which he feared would detain him till the sailing of the next steamer, and as his gold was already on board, and he did not wish to remove it, he placed it under my care, and it was so consigned to the list. IJutj at the last moment, he finished his business, and was enabled to come with me." " And Frank is the wealthy one !" gasped Lydia. "Yes. He delved and dug, while I speculated ; and he made a fortune, while I didn't." " Oh ! how I have been deceived 1" cried the disappointed wife. " Grossly deceived," added the mother. Sidney started from his seat, and having walked up and down the floor a few times, he stopped and faced the two women. He was very calm, and the bitter expression which had dwelt upon his face gave place to a mocking smile. " I guess we had better not deal too much in accusations," he said, "for I don't think either of us can claim much charity on that score. We have both of us perhaps all three of us played a pretty kind of a game, but it seems we all held losing hands. You were not averse to a little bit of deception for the sake of securing a rich husband ; and perhaps I am not free from the same weak ness. However, we've made a slight mis take, but the thing's done, and it can't be helped; so we must make the best of it. We had better keep it to ourselves than have it get out. Folks would enjoy it huge ly if they knew what a mistake you had made in your game at fortune hunting. All there is about it, we must turn to now, and work. I am caught, and I will make the best of it; but just let me assure you that I will not submit to any further fault-finding or recrimination.' When Nellie found herself within a com fortable, well-furnished house, and knew that it was her own, and that her husband was wealthy, she sank upon his bosom and wept in her joyful gratitude. She tried to chide him for having deceived her, but very soon he convinced her that he had not deceived her at all. " This" blissful hour," he cried, "has been my goal for years. Through all the weary seasons of toil I have leen sustained by the hope that in the end this fair hand should he mine; and not a joy has my wealth promised me that did not look to you as a sharer in it." Nellie believed him, and she was happy happy as die deserved to be happy as only such pure hearts can be. Frank went into business, and he hired his cousin Sidney for a bookkeeper, and paid him a good salary. Lydia had come to her senses, and when her mother went to live with Nellie she resolved that she would make the best of the estate which had fallen to her lot, though she will never cease to regret, during the momenta when the old thoughts of fashionable life come over her, the slight mistake she made in playing her (in me of Life. Large Farming a Precarious Business. The following figures are given by a Sun Francisco correspondent of a Phila delphia paper, as evidence that farming on a gigantic scale is jlrofitable neither to the country nor the farmer. He says: The largest wheat producer in Califor nia, or m the world, is Dr. II. J. Glenn. He was formerly from Monroe county, Missouri. He is a man of great enter prise and energy. His ranche lies in Colusa county, and comprises 60,000 acres, nearly all arable land. lie has this year 45,000 ncres in wheat, which, at a low calculation, will pro duce 900,000 bushels. His wheat will sell for eighty-five cents per bushel, or $765,000. Dr. Glenn has been farming ten years, and one would suppose he ought to have a handsome sum to his credit in bank ; hut what with a failure of crops--which occurs two years in every five and the enormous interest he pays on his loans, he is said to owe a round million of dollars. Iast year his credit was bad, as he had no crop. Now, with his splendid crop in prospect, he will probably get out. The Dalrimples, of St. Paul, who, ten years ago, were the largest farmers of wheat in Minnesota, raising as much as 40,000 bushels in a single year, went to the wall. Another large wheat raiser is 1). M. Keavis, whose land lies on the borders of Colusa and Butte counties. He is also from Monroe county, Missouri, and has an unpretending little estate of 15,000 acres, 13,000 of which are in wheat, which he thinks will average this year thirty bushels, or 390,000 bushels. He also is hard pressed, and I am told is paying nine per cent, on a couple of hun dred thousand dollars of liorrowed money. If farmers, raising half a million to a million bushels of wheat, cannot get out of debt, it might Vie well to inquire what is the use of having so much land ? The truth is that from the frequent fail ure of crops in California and the waste that attends on large operations of that kind, farmintr on a gigantic scale in this portion of the Pacific coast must be con sidered a failure. North of this, in Oregon and Weshington Territories, there is no failure of the harvest; farming opera tions are carried on on a smaller scale, and consequently the farmers, while not rolling in wealth, are all well-to-do. All men might he better reconciled to their fate if they would recollect that there are two kinds of misfortune at which we ought never to repine that which we can, and that which weeannot lemedy regret being in the former case unnecessary, in the latter unavailing. TIMELY TOPICS. A merchant, sitting in his office in"South street, New York, recently received an answer to his dispatch sent to Shanghai, China, six hours previously. Thirty thou sand miles in six hours is good time, even for the telegraph. The charge to Shanghai is $2.80 per word; to Yokohama, $3.0") ; but the code, or cipher, is so well systema tized by certain mercantile houseB,that a single word serves for a dozen when transcribed. Flour obtained by drying and pulveriz ing bananas before maturity wu among the articles of last year's Paris exhibition. It contained 66.1 per cent, of starch and only 2.9 of azotized matter. Brandy from the ripe fruit wa also- shown. Banana trees have the property of keeping the soil moist around them, and have therefore been planted in proximity to coffee trees in Ven ezuela, where droughts often exist for months. As the country cannot consume all the fruit, it has begun to export exten sively. In an editorial comment on advertising schemes, the Heading (Pcnn.) Time says : " There are men who would rather spend $10 or $20 in the rail-card and board nui sances, which may be seen by a few hun dred people, than to expend the same sum in their home papers, where tens of thou sands would see their cards every day. This is an age of newspaper reading, and the sooner business men come to realize this fact in all its importance, the better it will be for business generally, and the better it will be for themselves." In the celebrated Billingsgate Fish Market, in London, the electric light proved a complete failure, for the unex pected reason that it was too good. Business at Billingsgate begins at three o'clock in the morning, most of the bargains being struck by gaslight. When the searching electric candle was turned on, its brilliant whiteness literally showed the fish in such a new light that the trade was demoralized outright. Soles that would have fetched a shilling a pair by gaslight looked dear at sixpence, while turbot fresh from the sea looked a week old. The result was a general outcry. The copious and ornate dialect of the locality was enriched by a number of notable additions during the few days of the new light ; and for fear of a re volt among the " bummarees,'' as the fish salesmen are called, the corporation was obliged to restore the familiar yellow gas lights. The song of the nightingale has always been associated with some sort of unearthly, beautiful music; with long, languid nights in Eastern hinds; with dreaming grove, and cool shadows, and still waters, and full moons, and musk-laden air, and crooning insects, and leonine, dark-eyed houris, and love. This is somewhat the way in which we have thought of the nightingale's song. This is the way those fanciful individuals, the poets, have taught us to think of it. This is the way in which we should be glad to continue thinking of it, and the way that we should continue thinking of it, perhap, had not Mr. Bechstein and Mi. Davy, who have made the nightingale a study, in formed us that what the bird, in reality, docs say when it sings, is " Tiou, tiou, tiou, tiou, spe, tiou, squa-tio (six repetitions), tex-contio, contio, contio tzu, tzu, tzy," or " Wlieet, wheet, wheet, cur-r-r sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet, jug, iug, jig, jug swot swot, swot, swot, cur-r-r.'' Troubles of various kinds a e reported, from British India. Incendiary fires, kin dled by native malcontents, continue in the Poo n ah district. Kain is needed in many sections, so that the indigo crop will be al most a failure in any event, and other crops will fall short unless the drought, is soou broken. Cholera has apjieared in many cities of tho Punjab. Distress and famine, in connection with incompetency, corruption and lack of organization on the part of officials, are producing a most seri ous state of affairs. " Dacoity," or robbery by armed gangs, is assuming alarming pro portions, especially in the Poonah district. Bands of " dacoits" are scouring the coun try, committing most daring deeds of vio lence. They seem to be parts of a regular organiz-ition, under the command of one Wassadeo Bulwund. They are suspected of having destroyed many public buildings ; and in a remarkablemanifesto to the Bom bay government they threaten to raise another mutiny and put a price upon the head of the governor unless their distress is removed, native trade encouraged, taxes re duced and employmentsupplied by govern ment. Energetic measures are iow taken to suppress this mutiny. A Good Lawn. No greater fallacy exists than the idea that spading is better than plowing of anequal depth. No tilth can be better than that given by the plow, followed by frequent and continual applications of tho harrow. Leveling with the spade can then he executed in the most perfect manner, and the finishing touch can be given by a light cross-plowing and har rowing. Seed should be always liberally applied ; and, instead of the various lawn grass mixtures, we believe in the use of simple rod-top seed, together with a very little white clover ; and when it is thus applied (during the quiet hours of the day that it may fall evenly), two or three years should sullice to grow a thick, velvety turf. Weeds are tho great ene mies of good turf, and every lawn should be kept as free from these pests as a flower-garden. The employment of good arti ficial fertilizers greatly helps to secure permanent freedom from weeds, since foul seeds cannot lurk in them. ticrib ficr's Month!!. ' " It's a standing rule of our church," said one clergyman to another, " for the sexton to wake up any man that he may see asleep." "1 think," leturned the other, "that it would be much better for the sexton, when a man goes to sleep under you preaching, to wake you up. ' Even vV most veracious men lie at I night. A Subscriber's Soliloquy. To pay, or not to pay, that is tho question Whether 'tis better for me to rcfiwo To take a local paper, and deprive My family from reading all the news, Or pay up promptly what tho printer asks, And, by such payment, cheer him? No pay--no paper Then no more shall I bo posted on the news, And local haps throughout the town, And divers topics 'tis a consummation That I long have feared. To pay, or stop ? To stop! perchance to lose ay, there's the rub; For in that stop no interest d I take In any ot th' affairs which move the town, And such a shuffling off of all that's good Must make mo pause. There's the respect Which every editor maintains tor thoso Who come down with the cash and ne'er delay To settle up " that little bUl." For who would bear The pointed squibs and pungent paragraphs Which fur too oft reflect upon the man Who fails to settle his subscription bill ? I'll haste me now unto tho editor, And, with my purse plethoric in my hand, Will settle up in full, one year from date, By paying to him from my ready cash The sum which is his duo in advance. Hackenitack Republican. ITEMS OF INTEREST. Fashion notes Large bills. The modern watchword of life Tick. An elephant is always a big attraction. Did the man who took a half day off ever return it P The Washington dead letter office re ceives more than three million letters a year. According to the Yonkers Statesman tire mule's ears are immense side-whiskers. " Erratique Enrique" says the open ing story in a volume of sketches always comes tale first. " Consistency, thou art a jewel," as the office-boy said when he got paste of the right thickness. The United States Consul at Tangiers reports that tho deaths from typhus fever in Morocco number 300 a day. You may talk about Communists, but the person who chiefly desires that the ruler be done away with i3 the school boy. The Yale College boat crew is claimed to be the tallest that has ever rowed in this country, the men averaging six feet one inch in height. A Vienna statistician has published a pamphlet, in which he states that there are 102.831 peisons in Europe ninety years old and upward. The man who " launched on the sea of matrimony " took passage on a court ship. We hope he won't have a hard ship before the voyage is over. One person in 450 in Prussia is affected with insanity. A Berlin professor attri butes the result largely to intemperance among tho lower clitss, and too much lorcing of early education among others. The old Marquis of G., while looking out over Paris the other day from the spire of Notre Dame, said, sadly and re flectively: " How many people and how few men! How many houses and how few homes!" At the dedication of tho cathedral in New York five dollars was charged tor front seats, back seats were sold for three dollars, and admission to standing-room cost one dollar. Some choice reserved seats were sold at a premium. A shopkeeper in a small place not far from Berlin nought a doll dressed in a green muslin frock from a peddler for his child, aged one year and a half. The latter repeatedly put th doll into his mouth, as babies pften do, and a few days later showed very grave symptoms of some illness, which the doctor could not define till lie happened to cast his eye on the doll. The frock Avas imme diately sent to a chemical laboratory, where it was found to contain a quantity of arsenic sufficient to injure even an adult. Dwarfs. Old writers were fond of relating in stances of court dwarfs, when taken into the king's council, cutting out all the king's advisers by their shrewd observa tions and ingenious suggestions. As an example of their combativeness, we recollect hearing how some dwarfs in a showman's caravan asserted their mental superiority over the good-natured simple giants in such a manner tl at the poor bullied monsters actually stood in awe of their fiery little traveling com panions. " I have seen some men of very small stature," says an old writer. " Of this number was John de Estrix, of Meehlen, who was thirty-five years of age, had a long beard, ana was no more than three feet high. He could not go up stairs or climb up a form, but had to he assisted by a servant. He was skilled in three tongues, and proved himself ingenious and industrious." Almost as interesting a manikin was Jelfery Hud son, who, at a feast given by tho Duke of Buckingham, started up in complete armor from a cold pie on its being cut open. How also, at a court masuue, Evans, the king's gigantic porter, pulled out of one pocket a long loaf, and little Jetl'ery, instead of a piece of cheese, out of the other, is well known, and will re call somewhat similar incidents men tioned by Ainsworth in one of his his torical novels. It was this pigmy's cap ture by a Flemish pirate that was cele brated in a poem by Sir William Dave nant. Gibson, a page to Charles I., was another curious specimen of diminutive humanity. That must have been an interesting wedding for the spectators, when, at the dwarf marriage the queen gave awav Anne Shepherd, a bride, as small as "Gibson himself. The live of their nine children who arrived at ma turity were of the usual stature.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers