III M aHMBMiHv I III I I ru-n Rates of Advertising. On Square (1 Inch,) oi.e Insertion - $1 One Square " one month - I 00 OnnHniinrn " three month - 6 00 '5 1'UBLISBKD EVERY WEDNESDAY, BY . sr. WBroriE, CrriCS 15 BOBJHSOS k BONNER'S BOILLIKCr lELM BTEEET, HONEST A, PA. ,' One Square " one year - - 10 00 Two ."Squares, one year - - Quarter Col. 30 00 Half " " - 50 00 One " ' - - - 100 00 Legal notice at established rates. Marriage and death notices, gratis. All hills for vearlv ad vertiscment col. TERMS, il.60 A YEAR. N Snbuf-rlption received for a shorter j tod than three months. 'onesponrtonpo solleited from all parts I Iho fonnlry. No notice will lie taken of anonymous uoiuimmicatioiiK. lected quarterly. Temporary advertino- VOL. XI. NO. 52. TTONESTA, PA., MAIICII 19, 1870. $1.50 Per Annum. niCniM 1IH1L 111? illl ml 111 n'l niiv-t. Job work, Cah on Delivery. Dcflcon Thrush In LTTa vnOH hammah. naow to mitkb scldar. Dm Hor.nT. I must tell you about the way that our now deacon aot the ohnrob folk, by the ran to una that mode o' upeakln'. ni Jeat that orful voice, of Jili'n Hat, law J I'd beat begin "d tell my ntory itraight ahead, or elae things wont fit In. -t .nrlng we felt that we wai ble.aed, to think that Oeenon Thruah i n' up from Bimpklnaville to lire In Cedar- .Hh. !- capillar in our oburch," lays father, the fl rut tiling. ' h wai a pillar, Huldy, for then he oouldnt 7. t the Jone.ee' farm, yon know, and moved in It of May. t that Ami time be oame to church I rant for glt that day. i.e oixmiIu' hymn wai akuraly read, the ciholr wai Jan! an.ln', H hen everybody turned and looked, aonnd aerae - io inrprialn'.' Twaa aomotblng like the old cburob.bell, Hwaa aomethin' like the ocean, Twai moit like 'bijah Morrow', bull, accordiu' to my notloD. It fairly drowned my playin' out ; it left the tune behind : I never thought that inch a voice could come from human klud. Like hunderolepi and faotory-gear Through all our head! twaa rliigin'. And Huldy, It wai nothin' elae than Deacon Thruah a .ingio i Yea, there he not, with book in haud, ai peaceful and a. calm Ai if he thought hia dooty lay in murd'rlu' that poor , paalm. He never .ee the old folk.' imllei ; he sever heerd That went up from the gallery. I watched our par eon wriggle And fi'tgi't in the pulpit, while poor father'! bead wan ahakin'; int on went Deacon Thruah, and leemed real com. fort to bo taklu'. And whi n we .tupped he couldn't atop, he'd got arch heaifway on ; Hi. voice went boomlu' up and down, and flattln' . ao forlorn That, though he tried to clIoV. it off, it mixed up with hia text, And made poor 1'nreoii Edward, iklp hi. word., and ihin look vexed. I couldn't hear tbut .erinoii, Utility ; my thought. wa. all Sitray, A-wondrTin' id le.con Thruah would ling ageu that day. I mlglit have Kpnred my tuiiiklu', though, for that mlegii'ded man Jeat ulurlml on' the eatue old way before the reat began. But when the aerond verae wa. reached, the choir put down their book. ; I .topped my playin'; back and forth we caat deepalrin' look. The bova t up to laugh ageu ; the, paraon "ralaed bi. haud And auouteri, but tlie.nole waa lech we oouldnt nmler.taiid ; While Deacon Thruah waa leauin' back, hi. eyelid. nearly cIomIl',. " A-.lnglu' like an angel on a lied of cloud, repo.ln'. I'll have to cut my .lory abort. Next day they called a meetln', .evolved to keep oor Deacon Thruah aech alngln' from repeutiu'. They V'iuted Uncle Job to go with father and re quest That Deacon Thrush would kindly leave the aluglu' to the rent. Perhapa yon think he took the bint? Then, Huldy, you're mistaken. Ileliaieued till they'd aald their aay; then, with the .mile, a breakln'. He auiw.red, jeat a. cheerfully: " Tea, bretb'rlug ; . yea, I know I have my t aulta ; I aouietimea git the tune a leetle low, And loinrtimea, trylu' to ketch up, I take an extry flight; . But, takin' one verae with the next, that make. thing. Jnat come right. Mow wbeu you a.k me not to elng, why, bretb'rtng, I can't do it ; fiingin'. my dooty and delight, and I must jeat purnue it. And while I tread tbia vale of teara, a aiuful child of duat, B.jolclu'ia my privilege rejoice I will and muat." : Well, Iwa'u't no uie, a. Unole Job aud father aald next day ; The deacon, though a p oua man, waa aot in bil own way. He'e ung in nieelfn' ever aence there'i not a .eat to .pare ; And, oh ! well unful whirperin' and nudglu everywhere t Then wheu the hymna ia giveu out, you'll bear a giueral " Hueh !" While everyhody'a eyi and eara t. turned to Dea con Turuah. He' .kecred the little children ao that moat of 'em keefWeryin' ; The very horaeiu the ibed wont itand no more .' thout tyiu' ; tie makea tiie ouconverted laugh, while godly aoula are grlevln', And yet be', aech a Ohrl.ti.n man, It', ilmo.t paat bellevin'. They're Ulkin' now of tryiu law, but father be , opiionea. And ao 1'Jl write agen next week to tell you how it .clone!, P.P. Ob, Uuldy t lech a ouru. thing 1 A. Deacon Thruah wh. bringing Hi. apple, borne, he thought to cheer the way by sacred aiiigluv Hia tebiu took fright aud rau away. The neighbor. found him lyin' All in a heap, aud took him home, aud now the good niau'a dylu'. And, Huldy, et it lu't wrong, I'm glad to tbiuk he'. Kolu Where all the folk! kuow how to aing, and l:e can getaBbowiu'I liarptr'i Batar. Mexican Manners. A letter from Mexico epeaks very highly of the gentlemanly way ia wuith the press of Mexico received and enter tained some visiting Amerioan jour nalifita. After a pleassnt dinner they were taken to the ball fight, which the correspondent describes as brutal and repulsive. The letter - mentions the poor traveling accommodations in Mexi co, bat says that .several cars of each train are reserved for ladies gentlemen not admitted nnder any circumstances. According to this correspondent there is a grim huror in the politeness of Mexicans. He says : The Mexicans of all classes are polite exceedingly so. The gardener, or watr-carrier, shakes hands on meeting an acquaintance, lifts his hat, bows, and on parting, after ex changing a few words, goes through the same tferemony again. When excited and quarrelsome he never forgets him eelt, but prefaoen his offensive remarks in this wise : Benor, you are a fool," or "Senor, you are a rasoal," eto. When it finally oomes to the knife, and one falls to the ground mortally wound ed, his rival will smilingly bow toward his victim, raise his sombrero, wipe off his knife, and retire in good order. Agricultural ; It is exceedingly bad " husbandry " to harrow up the feelings of your wife. . By the use of the microphone you can hear the rope walk the butter fly, the gum drop, or the fall of the year. Chicago doctors consider the house furnace as their best friend. It gives them more cases of lang trouble than all other influences. THE RIGHT MAN AFTER ALL VIOLA S IiOVERS. Viola had fouDd a lover ; or, at least, John Ellsworth aspired to that distinc tion, lie had known Viola siDCO she was a little girl at school, and now was trying to win the first placo in the young lady's affections. Two years ago, the pnternal Ellsworth had given John, on Iiia twenty-third birthday, a deed of a small, good farm near his own. John set about making a home for himself, with one of his half-dozen sis ters to manage it, and went at his farm ing in earnest. And all the gossips of the neighborhood went about with chins elevated and no'os wrinkled when ho was mentioned. And the younger female portion thought him rather a denirabls object to maneuver for. Perhaps that was one renson why Viola had been so gracious to him. It was something to secure without an ef fort attentions that all the other girls schemed for. But John Ellsworth did not realize her ideal. Under her calm exterior, she dreamed romances of the most vivid rose pink. She had heard hints and echoes of a world that lay out Bide her own ephere a world of lights and music, and gay dressing ; a holiday life, with opem and theater-going nights in it ; and days full of unlimited pi es su r e-seeain g. Oro Jiiuo- night, driving over to see hibludy, John found her with an unusual flush on her fair, calm face. She rode with him accepting his in vitation in a matter-of-course way that was dreadfully discouraging. It came out, after a litlle. Mrs. Morningtoti a great aunt had sent for her photograph a month ago, not hav ing seen ber since she was a little child. Two days ago had come au invitation for Viola to spend a couple of months with her the great aunt in New York, and she was goiDg to morrow. "It's no use denying," the young'man said, his voice growing husky, that I'm sorry for this. I don't know what will come to you from this. Yon are not contented here; you never will be till you have had an experience beyond it perhaps not then. I am not wiee to t U you now, I suppose, but I love you, Viola. Mind, I do not ask you now for ny return. I will wait for what the future shall put in you heart to say." It was a loner speech, certainly, for a proposal; but Viola listened very atten irely to her first proposal, and her blue ejes softened. ' " Indeed I do care for you, John, and n can't blame me for wanting to go. Aunt needs me, and no one doos here, iurt.icnlarly. And I've never seen anj .i . .I ii'iug vi socieiy. . I know, dear" " And I shall not forget you," inter rnpting him. I shall always think of j on." giving him her hand. "For two whole months!" a little sadly. "GcoJ-by, then," kissing the hand he held. And then Viola found herself alone, and went to finish her packing. Viola's next two months were delight ful. She was always prettily dresseit, and Fiauk Thorpe passf d his valuable time beside her. Mrs. Morningtou yjtched the girl narrowly, and when Viola ceme home the second week in September, it was with an invitation to stay through the wintf r. John Ellsworth called on her the night after her return. " You look well and happy," he said, scanning her face. "I am," she said, and she told him all abont her delightful visit. " And yen are going to settle down with tlh now ?" " Oh, no I I shall stay here only a few days. Aunt is coming for me as she re turiiU from a visit she is paying." John Ellsworth went away early in the evening, having said no word of what had been in his heart all these weeks. "Poor fellow 1" Viola aid, as she went down the moonlit road. And then Prank Thorpe's dreamily sad gray eyes came up before her, and she forgot John Ellsworth's shadowy brown ones. Mrs. Mornington came and took the young lady away, and Frank Thorpe was once again hanging about her a most formidable matrimonial prize. The Christmas holidays came and went Frank Thorpe lounged in on Christmas day, and was paler and more listless than ever. "Frank Thorpe, you are utterly stupid. What is the matter?" asked Mrs. Mornington. "A general giving way of the system, I should say." "Nonsense! General laziness. In my day" "Oh, my dear madam I" starting up alarmed. "Indeed, I'll reform. I think I'm better already. Miss Viola, I'm intensely interested in the subject ocorfpying your thoughts at present, if you'll tell me what it is," anxiously. "I was wondering if you were ever in love, and how she treated you," laughed Viola. Over Thorpe's face rushed a flood of scarlet, lie glanced np, caught Mrs. Mornington's sharp eyes upon him, and flashed again. Mrs. Mornington gave her first bit of advice to her young charge that night. "Frank Thorpe is not a man to trifle with, my dear. I think he is in love with you. You could hardly do better. " "Do better!" raising her broad lids for a full, steady look. "I hadn't thought there was to be any calcula tion. No; Frank doesn't care for me, aunt." "If he is in love with yon, so much the better. But come; Mrs. Grove's Christmas ball mast be attended." And Viola went to the ball, and froze Frank Thorpe, who, unconscious of offense, languidly assumed his usual station near her. There was something glacial and tremendous in her general stylo that night that provoked and amused Mrs. Mornington. But she was beautiful, too more beautiful than over and so her aunt forgave her. Among Mrs. Grove's guests that night was a rather grand-looking man, who certainly was no longer young. Having lost one wife, he was row looking for another. V7Lhu he wa presented to Viola, she was barely civil. Mr. Nicol son seemed to like it. Frank Thorpe had ceased being frozen. To tell the truth, Viola made the ad vances. There was a shade more of languor in his manner, and his sad gray eyes had an added shadow, but he sought no explanation. Restored to sunshine, he accepted that, too, with no particular demonstra tion, but he seemed to enjoy it. To outside lookers-on, the matter seemed to lie between liim and Mr. Nicolson, whose attentions were perfectly straight forward and business-like. One frosty, sparkling morning Viola had been out for a walk. On the way she had met Frank Thorpe, as she was very apt to do. Ho accompanied her home, and en tered the house with her. There, Viola, feeling unusually bright herself, began lecturing him on his purposeless life." " If I were a man " emphatically. " Thank heaven you are not ! How ever, go on." " You put me out. Mr. Thorpe, why don't you do something?" "Do something? Don't I? I am your devoted attendant three-fourths of my waking life." "Yes; and get yourself and me talked about by everybody. Not that I care, certainly," hurriedly, to cover her blunder. " I shall choose my friends where I please !" making matters worse, of course. He sat up with sudden energy. "Miss Viola, if I were a womau" "Thank heaven you are not." "Exactly. However, if I were, I cer tainly would not flirt with that antedilu vian relic, Mr. Nicolson." " Mr. Thorpe, I-don't." " Miss Viola, I beg yous pardon, you certainly do." She looked at him With an astonished red in her cheeks and light in her eyes. Then she laughed frankly and good naturedly. "You see," leaning forward and Ittying his hand confidentially on her rm ' I oan't bear to see a clear-hearted, honest girl lowering herself to the ways of these artificial, brainless girls, who have been bred up a-1 their lives to the business of catching a husband. You don't need any such paltry ambi Mon. Wait till you find a man worth 'ailing in love with, and then marry him. Wait forever, if yon don't find him 1" Viola sat motionless with astonish menf. If any dumb thing had found a voice, she cauld not have been more amazed. And she had felt so fully oalled to administer advice. While she sat, his hand still on her arm, and her eyes still on his face, the door opened, and John Eds worth was ushered in. Viola swept toward him, with eager, outstretched hands. " Why, John ! Why, John !" was all she could say. And Frank Thorpe, being disturbed by this new comer, who was called John and received with snch an outbreak of enthusiasm, gathered himself up and lounged away. John Ellsworth was in town for a fort night. Mrs. Mornington treated him with great politeness, and was always in the way in the most natural manner in the world, when he came. Viola always acorpted his invitations, and when the time came for their fulfillment, there was some unavoidable obstacle in the way. Meantime, Mr. Nicholson's atten tions grew more pointed, and Frank lhorpe Kept out of the way. Then Lent came, and there was a sud den cessation of gayety. John was call ed away by hia father s illness, and Viola felt the inevitable reaction. And she did not know that she would live through It, and be ready and eager for another season when the time came. It was alike everywhere. Jm the nar row circle out of which she had come there were jealousies, and heart-burnings, and petty scheming no better and no worse than she had come to know in the past weeks, though possibly less disguised by smooth, conventional polish of manner. Wait till she met a man she loved! She might wait till she was gray and blind. There had never ap peared one to whom she would give a second thought, unless it were well, perhaps, John Ellsworth, if the life that would follow with him were not too nar row to breathe in ; or Frank Thorpe, if he were not too lazy to speak. And then, by contrast, there came a vision of Mr. Nicolson, and all his wealth. If she had shown the first symptom of her moods to Mr. Nicolson, he would have desisted from his attentions at once. Here was youth and beauty in a statuesque state of perfection. That was what he wanted the statuesqueness; and everybody considered it a settled affair. I think Viola began to consider it her self. She had just one letter from John Ellsworth after his return, and he had said: " I love you, Viola, and am wait ing for you." She did not answer the letter. But she was cross even with Mrs. Morning ton for two days after it. Then she was seised with a fit of homesickness, and but that her friend was tuken suddenly and really ill, noth ing would have kept her there. Mr. Nicolson came more freqnentlv than ever; in his way very kind and consider ate. Frank Thorpe was m and out, not so frequently as boforo that morning when John Ellsworth had come, but often enough to keep him in her thoughts. One night, in early spring, Frank Thorpe came and took Viola out for a drive. You were looking tired. We may not have another such night in a month," t rank said . In the half-hour they did not speak half-a-dozen sentences; and yet when he set her doyn at her door,, and held htr band for a minute, as he said, " Fare well I Viola felt they were nearer each other than before. Viola was one morning summoned to the drawing-room to meet Mr. Nicol son. In the occupation of the past weeks she had had very little opportun ity to think about him or his purposes. Mo girl ever went to meet the final question with less determination as to her answer. She knew his errand the moment she entered the room. Not that he was confused or hesitating, or in any way disconcerted. " My dear young lady," he said, de ferentially, " I want your permission to ask you a personal question?" " xou nave it, sir, she said. And then in a speech which was more like a set oration than anything else Viola had ever heard, he offered her his hand and fortune. The thought of saying no to such a stately piece of oratory as that frighten ed and flulterad ber. But she did say it, very sweetly and gracefully, but also very decidedly, and Mr. Nicolson went away very red in the face and a' good deal crestfallen. She wont up-stairs to Mrs. Morning ton. "Aunt, I've done it! Aud I'm so surprised I" "At what?" " I've refused Mr. Nicolson." "My dear, I always thought you would." " Did you ? You astute woman I And always fancied that if he asked me to bo Mrs. Nicolson, I sould say, yes." " Perhaps you will bo sorry by-and-by that you have said no." " Perhaps 1 1 shall never be surprised at anything again!" ' From a worldly point of view, you have made a mistake, my dear." " Don't rack my feelings. They are sufficiently laoerated already." A servant announced Frank Thorpe. "Aunt, shall I" and paused. Even in her reckless, over-excited jaood, she could not complete the sen tence. " Shall you be kinder to him than von have been to Mr. Nicolson ?" "Don't ask me." So Viola went down to see her visit or, who was at the full tide of his languid, tired indifference. " How very entertaining you are to lay ! Your conversational powers are something to be wondered at," Viola said it last, impatiently. "Entertaining?" opening his eyes with mild wonder. " I supposed that was your share of the interview. How ever, if you like, I'll begin. Yon are not looking so well as usual this morn ing." " Thank you. What a very promis ing beginning." But you have infinitely the advan tage of Mr. NicolBon, whom I mot just, now. He seemed laboring under the impression that there had been an earthquake." Viola laughed, and ended with a half sob. "And bo there had been. There, talk about something else: You needn't be entertaining any more." " I wonder," leaning toward her, a slow fire gathering in his dreamy eyes, "if I should find an earthquake waiting for me if I followed Mr. Nicolson's lead!" " Miss Rawdou," the servant an nounced, and that put an end to it all. Viola reasoned herself into a convic tiou that she was in love with Frank Thorpe, or if not actually in thet con dition, that she might easily liud her self there. Ana because passive pa tience was not possible just then, she gathered up all John Ellsworth's gifts and letters and put them out of her sight, as if he had anything to uo with it. The crisis was not far off. Coming in from an errand that night eh found all the dimly-lighted house empty, and went on from room to room till in the library she opened the door on Frank Thome. " Since you were not at home, I came to nnd for myself a volume Mrs. Morn ington had promised me," he explaimed. But he closed the door as he gave her a chair, as if the tete-a-tett were part of his plan. She looked up at his pale face and shining eyes, and felt her heart sink. And yet this was the conclusion to which she had reasoned her; elf a few hours ago. And then five minutes of talk, in which her part was monosyllabic, and Frank Thome had proposed and been accept ed ; and she was crying quietly, with her head on the library Uble, and he was walking the room in an agitated move ment. " We might as well begin with a clean record," he said with a great deal of herd earnestness in his voice, "You are not my first love, Tiola. Not quite two years ago she jilted me. I was in an awfully spoony condition there's no denying it; and, for a few weeks, thought it would be the death of me. One morn ing my letters and trinkets came back to me. There was not a word of expla nation, and I did not choose to ask any. When I bad tired myself out, and was in a condition to lie down in dnst at her feet, the house was shut up nnd the family had gono abroad. That's the whole of it." " Aud the young lady's name ?" " Emily Presoott." "Emily Prescott? - Why, that is the voung lady I met this afternoon. Just home from abroad in Paris raonrning. Her father and mother both died some where in France, in the spring, tfndshe camo homo with the Mrrtons." "Viola," staring at her with eager eyes, " I can't believe it," dropping into a chair. " My poor darling " A flash of color shot np into Viola's face. She went and stood by him, with her hand on his sbwilder. " It seems to me, Frank," in her most commonplace, practical voice, "that the little arrangement we entered into ten minutes ago might as well be quietly annulled. Your poor darling ' is at present with the Mertons. Hadn't you better go up there at once, and arrange your programme ? " " I don t know. Viola you will think me a scoundrel, but I believe I love her yet." " Of course you do. Who doubts it r There, don't say a woman can't be gen erous. Think of my agony iu releasing you, and go as soon as possible." " You are generous, dear. "That depends on our relative esti mate of the sacrifice. Good-night." After that nothing could keep her in town, and three days after arriving home, driving her old-fashioned pony- chaise through t he green country road, she came upon John Ellsworth walking, and he accepted her invitation to ride. " It is so good to be here again. I was thoroughly homesick." " When are you to be married r "Never ! " with a burst of vehemence; "unless you oh, John ! " with a hys terical sob. At home a telegram awaited her ; Mrs. Mornington wus dead. Mrs. Mornincton died poor. She had spent all her money. So poor Viola was not an heiress after all. And the neighbors said : " After she found she could not get either of those city fellows, and that eld lady disap pointed her about her money, she came back here end took John HJlswortb. And he put up with it ; but then there's no fool like a man when he's in love with a girl like that. ' A Thrilling Adventure. A nierohant wishing to celebrate his daughter's wedding, collected a party of her young companions. They circled nronud her, wishing mndi happiness to t'uu youthful bride and her chosen one. The father gazed proudly on his favored child, and hoped that as bright pros pects might open for the rest of his children, who were playing among the gUfStS. Passing through the hall of the base nifiit he met a servant who was carrying a iighted candle in her hand without the candlestick. IIj blamed- her for such conduct, aud went into the kitchen to see about the supper. The girl retumod, but without the cauole. The merchant immediately recollected that several bar rels of gunpowder had been placed in the cellar during the day, and that one had been opened. " Where is your candie ?" he inquired, in the utmost alarm. " I co.uhln't bring it up with me, for my arms were full of wood," said the girl. " Where did you put it? ' " Well, I'd no candlestick, so I stuck it in some black sand that's in the raud barrel." Her master dashid down the stairs; the passage was long and dark; his knees threatened to give way uuiler him, his breath was choked; his flesh seemed dry Rnd parcheJ, as if he nlready felt the suffocating blast of deth. At the end of the cellar, under the very room where his children and their friends were reveling in felicity, ho saw the open barrel of powder, full to the top, the candle stuck loosely in the grains, with a long red snud of burnt wick. The sight seemed to wither all his power. Tho laughter cf the com pany struck his car like tho kuell of deuth. He stood a moment, unable to move. The musio commenced above; the feet of the dancers responded with vivacity; the floor shook, and the loose bottles iu the cellar jingled with the motion. He fancied tiieoandle was moving falling. With def perato energy he sprang for ward but how to remove it. Tho slightest touch wonld canse the red-1 ot wick to fall into the powder. With un equa'ed praseucs of mind he placed a haud on each side of the candle, pointed toward the object of care, which, as his hands met, was secured in the clasp of hia fingers and safely moved away from its dangerous position. When he reaohed the head of the stairs he smiled at his previous alarm; but the reaction was too powerful, and lie fell in fits of the most violent laughter. He was conveyed to his bed senseless, and many weeks elapsed ere his system recovered suffi cient tone to allow him to resume his business. Hon. J. D. Cox describes what is said to be the smallest insect known. It is a hymenopter of remarkable delicacy and beauty, parasitic on the leaf-cutter bee. Its body is twelve-thousandths of an inch in length, and its ten-jointed antenna twenty-thousandths. Mexicans subdue fractious horses by having a hood so arrangod as to be pulled down over the eyes of the horse as soon as he manifests uneasiness. Sev eral applications subdue the horses permanently. ITEMS OF INTEREST. Homo meu are like brooks, they are always murmuring. , A button is a very small event which is always coming off. A pRste-pov doesn't denote time, jet t is known by its stick. Electricity exerts a peculiar and wot Jerful effect on some plants. Fancy wood sawing is now madg an occupation of insane patients. A bird-fancier calls his canaries 1 Rich es " because they have wings. The largest metal statue in the world is situated near the city of Arona, Italy. Qiery for a druggist : Which is the easier -to put prescriptions up or down ? If a girl's hair is plaited, you can't with propriety say she has golden hair.,,. A new town in Idaho has b Onegirlia, because there is onlyoae gul there. When a Mongolian wash-house in De troit took fire, "John" picked up his shirts and murmured: "The Chinese must go." Free Press. " Excuse haste and a bad pen," as the dirty porker said when it rushed out of its sty and- knocked over the man with lavender pants. Rome Sentinel. In the course of a recent libel suit the English attorney-general said : "There is at present a mania in literature, art and philosophy to say something which cannot be understood." WEARING TBK OBEEX. Ad editor wore a green coronet, As if he had been a fresh baronet, T'whs a shade for his eyes, Turned np toward the ekies. 'Twrb a way he got into of wearin' it. BP SAMCOSV. I'll tell yu:i a tale and it's strictly true; It batu't a title to bother you; Tib bloody, and horrid, and something new. And as to the subject I'll give a clew By stating in writing a word or two, Tt at sprinkle and speck the narration through Hhoe, drew, knew, bine, Cue, dew, mew, stew, ' Queue, drew, too, who, Craw, flew, to, brew, illce, ewe, slew, new, Do, few, chew, glne. Perhaps yon imagine I ish to guy ! That such i the case I at once deny; Tin not in my nature ts tell a lie. And enn't you discover, discern, deiery, The poiats I am giving you on the sly ? Tben-fttrwh the story and guess, or try High, any, tie, fie, Dry, cry, sitfh.die. My, eye, sky, high, l'ly, pie.sty, fry, B ly, rye, tri, ply, Why, pry, thigh, wiy. The plot of the talo U ro dwply laid .So mixed aud oanfoanded, I'm bt afraid You'd think it a miniac'a wild tirade. But no 'tis a story expressly made To show tt-ectopic tbe stock in trade Of doggorel poets of humble grade Staid, maid, weighed, braid, Aid, Jtde, wade, gladj, 1'iid, said, frayed, ehade, - Bade, played, raid, bUde, Delayed, decayed, evade, fsde, Decado, brigade, lemonade. Yonktrt Oatetle. Following the Pa, tern. A singular reproduction of an archi tectural defect has lately been brought to light in New York. When Dr. Clioe ver's "Church of the Puritans," on Uu'ou Square, wus built, it was made an exact copy of a church, in Berno, Switzerland, of which a member of the congregation traveling in Europo had takt u drawings. A striking peculiarity of tho structure was the two towers, one much higher than the other, but similar in every other respect. The church stood for twenty-five years, nnd was then sol 1 to a Baptist .congregation and re moved to Fifty-third 6treet; every ttone being marked and placed in the posi tion it had formerly occupied. The tall tower and the short one were carefully reproduced; andnowBome person, pry ing iuto the history of the original model in the city of Berne, has unearth ed the architect's plans and specifica tions of the Swiss church, and, behold, the two towers are exactly the same height the church was unfinished. The Swiss Calvinists were a little short of fuuds, and the result of their finan cial stringency was twice faithfully per petuated in the Western hemisphere, the unequal towers being supposed to be eminently the proper ecclesiastical What Those Long Nights Mean. Ah, yes, fond yout'a I It may be very nioe to court a girl in the far northern . countries where the nights are six months long; but just think of the vast amount of peanuts and gumdrops the young man, when going to see his girl, must lug along with him in order to kill time and induce her to believe that his affec tion for her is as warm as ever. And then the Bad leavetaking a few weeks be fore sunrise! He whispers, "Good night, love," and she softly murmurs, "Good-night, dear. When shall I see you again?" "To-morrow night," he replies, as he kisses her upturned face. " To-morrow night," she replies, with a voice full of emotion. "6ix long weary months I Can't you call around a few days before breakfast, Charles?" Fi nally Charles tears himself away, with a promise to write her one hundred and sixty letters before the next day draws to a c'ik-c, tforrittoion Herald.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers