1 A G HAND GULF CAVERN A GREAT CAVE THAT 5 JN SOUTH WESTERN MISSOURI. It XTrete - Dptfca Were Flrat ri?:or4 by Tw Men of More Thaa Oriiirr Cnnra The Story Their Pcrllom Jaaraey. South-nest Missouri Is full of strange orib formations that are called uat iral" curiosities la spite of their ud i.atnra'iicsa. The earth Is full orcavea wJ sick bolesi One of tlie most t-clo-tusti-d of these Is the Grand On'.f, In O.i ;:oo county, about four tuilet from Ko.'Ltoaons- It Is a sort of canyon. In fiba;e Dot tialike a horseshoe and serves the purpose of a drainage bed In the Tret wason foe a 12 mile area of hills. The canyon is 3C0 feet deep, with a natural bridge in one place and & si!l;(erraD-an lake and river that opens at one cud. The river only exists dur ing the wet tseat-on. for the earth at the lKjUotn of the canyon Is porous end absorbs the water. The lake, bow ever. Is full the whole year round. This ccve. containing the tubter rr.uan river ad lake, had at vt Ix-cn explored to tlie end till the summer if lSSTi. when far. Foley, a saloon keeper f.-oi; Thayer, with a companion per formed the cspioit. Foley had made tno t;i;s brfure into the cave, but Lad not l-cu able to secure a companion i-oiiraceous enough to persevere In the enterprise. Each nan had weakened and returned before the end of the rave was reached. On the third trip, Im'xever, Foley had with him a inaa of courage. The entrance to the cave is wide and di-ep. Th? led Is of broken rtones. over which trickles a. tiny stream of water in the dry season. A hundred fet In Kide tie cr.f the entrance suddenly narrows t:it(i a hole so small that a i::aa must gi-t on hands and knees to pass thrt;u?h. I'-eyond this liarrow hole t'ie entrance widens Into a large prottc. There is a Mevp hill to climb; nert the hill descends sharply "Into a lake. To penetrate to the end of this Like It was ti.-ocsrary to have a loat so small that It could te dragged through the narrow passage into the grotto. Foley atid liis companion built a boat of suitable size and hanled it through the narrow entran.-e. They took with tlicni also a long c-il of rope, a quant!- ty of matches, tome railroad lanterns and four torches with rottoa waddlr.g on the ends w.aked In kerosene. The cave of course is perfectly dark. The i:i-n used their lanterns till they got through the. narrow place, but to their BTii Zi-ment the lantern Annies Inside tLe grotto slowly ?rew dim and finally went out. They tried to light them ngaiu. but the sulphur the matches world flare t:p only to b- extinguished Immediately. The reason of this was that the atmosphere was exceedingly damp and heavy. The men succeeded In lighting the our kerosene torches, and grasiJng one of them in each hand they made their way down the slope to the lake end stood the torches np between the rocks. The torches smoldered like hot coals, g'virg out very little flame. The Ix.at was dragged down to the lake, the toivhiHi fastened at the prow and stern, oe eud of the rope tld to a bowlder a:id the rest of the coil thrown in the boat. When the two men sat down in the frail craft they found the wat-?r rose to within three Inches of the gun wales. It was Impossible to use oars without tipping the boat far euough to sink it. so the men were forced to pad dle cautiously with their hands. They forced the little craft Into the unknown lake, the smoldering torches lighting up the blackness for only a few feet around them. Outside it was a warm summer day. they knew, but inside It was like a closed refrigerator, all blackness and dampness and cold. The water of the lake was ice cold, and at every few dips they had to slop auiP warm their Lauds. There was nothing to be seen on any 6ide noth ing but darkness. No sound could IK-uetrate the cavern. If the boat should capsize as it was likely to do with the slightest disturbance they would be cramped in a minute in (he cold water without a chance of hwlp from the outside. After a long and tedious paddling the loafs prow was suddenly buried in a bank of mud and graveL Foley took a torch and stepped out cautiously In liis rubber boot Into the mud. He found he had come to the eud of the lake and that a shandy inclined wall of rock rose before him. The saloon keeper climbed tip the wall about 40 feet above the lake searching for a continuance of the cavern. But be could find none. Apparently the cav ern ended there. He returned to the lo.it, where Ids companion sat. The two men made their way across the lake and out through the narrow place In safety. They had been gone an hour, and their friends outside had be gun to fear an accident had hapiened to them. So far as people know, the cave In the Grand Gulf has no outlet. The Indian traditions about the cave are that It was a subterranean waterway much used at one time by boatmen, who used to carry provisions In boats to the Arkansas valley. If this 1 true, the river must have been stop;ed up mauy years ago by some convulsion of na ture and the lake formed then. Kan sas City Star. Tbe TVIt Mr. Iteeehrr Kepi 1m. In the early days at Mr. Beeeher's eareer. when wit was unknown In the pulpit, some of the deacons of his church asked him If be didn't think such frequent outbursts of humor weir calculated to diminish liis usefulness. He listened patiently, and when they finished be said. "Brethren. If yon only knew bow many f;i;ny tilings 1 keep In you wouldn't complain alout the few I let out-" Ladies Home Journal. Shattered DUitnoas. Tnder certain conditions, wU!;h are very rare and remarkable, said an old Jeweler, "a diamond may be scattered to atoms by a smart, sudden bl jw. The tUoue seems to disintegrate and fly apart, as nearly as 1 can express it, end when the Kistberley gems first tame Into the market the Brazilian brokers claimed that they were espe cially subject to that kind of accident. For the time being the story Lad its effect on l ade, but It was proved to be untrue, and the incident is uow forgot ten. Ia- the course of aa experience of nearty 40 years 1 Lave known of only two cases of diamonds being broken. "One occurred many years ago, when I was working In a shop In the old Reid Ilouse In CLattanooga. A lady customer dropped a cluster brooch from the counter to the tiled floor, a distance of abont SVi feet It struck Kquarely on the center stone, which was broken Into a number cf i;ma!l ir regular fragments. The diamond Laf weighed about two carats. "The other instance took place here la New Orleans about six years ago. A t?t. Louis traveling man earned Crawford Lad a o!ita!re weighing l'i ecrats set In a ring. He was standing la the store and while converging r.lwit something made a sudden gesture and etriK-k the stone against a metal fix ttire. It was split Into small Japged splinters, a cumber of which we found on top of the showcase. The drummer Limseif was the most astonished man I ever saw. He had supposed dia c.ouds were mdestruetlble simply be cause tbey were Lard." New Orleans Times-Democrat Of m 1 rum. "Seven dollars and fifty cents for a look like that"" exclaimed the yoeng man. pnttirg bis purse, bark in his 'K-ket. "Why. that costs like sin!" "My young friend." said tie elderly book ngept. "there is not hint -hat cost I; e ia "-Chicago Tribune. The College Dose !. Two jouag men who nirrt ltnvf? lverl cji-dica! stiulcn's boarded cu Angora" cr late one nighx v.iih a fully articn latetl '.;ekt'a. 1.,-h bad o-ie arm linked with that of the skeleton, whose bones rattled grewsomely fi they walk ed to the forward end of the car au J prayely seated themselves with ibcir Inanimate tomiwniou between them. Between the grin-Jug teeth of lie skel eton was a cigarette.' and a derby hat I dfwnod its shining Fkcll. The car was lather crowded, and the other passen gers. ruot of svho:n were men. gazed In oien mouthed astonL-hmcut at the j ftrange spectacle. The two young f t ! j lows, however, pretended to be uncoa- ecloss of their surrounding and held siuli converse with the skeleton as "Too bad you didnt wear your mack intosh. Bill: I'm afraid you'll catch cold," or, "Kay, Bill letter throw away your cigarette or the conductor will put you oH." When the conductor came through for t':e fares, one of the young iwa Landed him 3." c-nta, and he rang up three fares without a word of com ment. At "Sixteenth street a yqjjaa rill entered the car and looked irouad for a s"at. -Here, Bill," exclaimed one of the students, "v. here's your gallan try? fret up anil give the lad;." a seat. Then be yan!;ed the skf loton out of its place and set it on his knees. The girl gave one screeoli, fii-d to the back plat form and Insisted that the conductor sb-p the car and put her 02. "Gee. r.T.:" remarked the student, gazing reproachfully into the skeleton's face. "You've deteriorated. You twl to !e quite a lily's man. Then ev erybody Laughed. Philadelphia Bee crd. An Add I-fl vr. To r"-in:;-!i a t.aa fr,r nonpayment of a certain tr.T. by forbidding L:i:i to en ter a rest.i::ai:t is n rather ia-rulnr act of wvei-umei.t. yet in the canton of Bern such a law Is In efTeet. Bvery man 11 Switzerland must serve in the Swiss sruiy if he be phyiea!!y cspaM; and if be not pi:ysi.-iil!y capable he must pay what is caikd the military exception tax. In the canton of Bem a rigidly enforced law is in effect which prohibits a p.-rs.-n who has not paid this tax from entering any of the vari ous lH-r gardens and saloons t-ntil the tax is p.iid. This law is called the "wirtsli.tusver-bct- Tfcr govern. lent srys that If a i:iaa lffis met:ey to spend for eoCTee. beer or lienors i.e must also Lav t:io:i?y en.jrgh with which to pay bis debt to t.ie s-.ate. At Intervrrls one way lead In the local oiUcial papers the list of names of those who n.ust stay away from the gnrdwus. The law cannot prohilit a person from obtaining li j iior throug'.i the interveiitiou or Itelp 'f a frk-ri-l but the privilege of dropping into a favorite resort and bobnobblu; with friends a custom which is dear to every Swiss must be foregone. The h-v is effective for several rea sons. The military est lupt'c.u tax Is small it is gracrally paid and the or diiiary peasant d.-es uct like to see his tame publicly printed. Culcago. Uec ord. Tbe Crack I tbe Mlrrar. Sir Noel Baton, the painter. njoyeJ hliiiost as vide -a et k-brlty as a Joker us he did as an artist. -a eiieounur he had with a phy.-ieiaa in Yorkshire, with whom he was on the most inti mate terms, is an Instance in point. Sir Noel was the physician's guest. His drawing room boasted of a mag nificent mirror, which readied from lloor t ceiling of the lofty room. One moniiiig while the guests were assembled in the rooui one of them no ticed a lari'e crack near the top of the mirror. The physician was honor .stricken acd a;kd question after ques tion in an t-ITort to discover the cui;r;t IVrphxeil and sorrowful, he st.C;' looking at tiie shattered g!;:"s when ir Noel asked that a sicpiadder l-e brought that Le miht examine it more closvly. Jlouiiting. Le drew a rag from bis pocket and hastily ran it across the supposed crack, whin, lo and behold, it disappeared! lie explained that. laiug come dowu earlier than the rest of the guests, he procured a lad der and a bar of soap and lutlieted the seemingly irreparable injury. lrtrrci Paint Thrir Faces. "It is a mistaken idea tliat actresses are as a general rule handsomer oa the stage than off;" writes FranlJia Fyles in The J-adics' Home JournaL "The reverse is es likely to be true. Never theless nli theatrical faces have to be painted. It may be assumed safely that none of the complexion Is gen nine. An exceptionally clear ami pink skin may require no falsity. A dari one may chance to suit the character to ! assumed. But these exceptions to the rule are rare. TUe glare of artificial light would make most faces ghasi'y white or unpleasantly sallow if bright hues were not laid on. The art cf col oring a pretty visage Jist enough and tiot overdoing it is one whicW nil ac tresses should learn. Many do no:, and so we see beauty disfigured In stead of enhanced. Others nre very expert, "i here are two distinct pro? isses. Ore makes use of colored pow ders appii sl dry: the other mixe the same powders with grens. making a substance called grease paint." "MnkltiB Oirr" a lint. A Corry woman, who could net f fo-d a new S5 hat. visited a miiiinery store, saw the late styles, went Imme. pounded her old bat for half a a hour with a roiling pin. stuck a feather through the l and ami went to church the next Sunday the euvy of ail the women in the town. Brie Dispatch. Orlslaalitr. Original thing are not always g-xd. The Pest that any writer can do Is to absorb facts and similes as a cow does grass then give c-s good a quality of the milk of coinnn sens as possible. New York Journal.. Ale SarprUptl Thcrj. Alexander MaeArthur, ftuthor of a successful study of life in the I.?t!n qiuiner of Paris. v !-.kh Inugiit to the writer Iwjth popularity and prof::, is ah t the pnpil and biographer of Bu binsttia. The author lived for two years in St Petersburg, oonvspouding for the Loudon press and takiug part in fome thrilling adventures, but the most singv.Iar of the writer's experi ences happened in Chicago after the novel had ln?en brought out by a pul lisher of that city. The book had be-n so successful that the publisher decid ed to give the anthor a dinner. t which a dozen of the leading men of letters la the lake city were Invited. The guests had assembled when the author was announced. Through the blue baze of smoke there appeared a handsome young wo mm attired In evening dress. "We are expecting Mr. MajArtbur," said he Lost. "Mr. ijexander Mac Arthur, the novelist." "So I understand." returned the un expected guest. "I am Alcxaader Mac Arthur." " "You 7" gasped the publisher. "Yes. lidn't yoa know? I am Lil lian MaeArthur. at your service. I hflve leen writing over the name cf Alexander ever since 1 lvft my home In Dublin." It was only the work of a miante to rearrange matters, and the dinner was great success. Saturday Evening rost Fear EtII Spirit. Evil spirits are held In srreflt dreail by the Chinese, who believe them t? bear spec: i!l will to the eldift son of the ramuy and to delight In playing unkind tricks upon Llm. To prevent this the e!J-st son in one family was named "Sixth Little Sifter." the .-hod's tared evidently be;:i3 under the Im tression that evil soiri-s could be dt- ceived as to the sex of the little cne. I UETWEEN TWO TIKES ; A TRAIN? AN S CAUSTIC COt.lMcNT CM I RAILROAD R'JLES. t i ! To Oar? Tl-m Ml, lie Sbt. Mraaa to t.vr t'iiu cud Wia n Dlfbrm. To PrnL Thrtu aad Have aa Aert lrat Sltaii a DUrbirfe Alo. It l?a Interesting position that one finds vl en f-ta.'.yiug the relations t!iat connect the railroad employee with the read Itself with regard to the ruk-a and regubMiiiiii It Las a ring t "heads 1 win. and tails yoa lose" in favor of the nsid when it comes to de ciding where the responsibility lies when an accident occurs. An old rail road employee, a member of a train crew, wis conversing with the wr!"er recently, and in going over it the sit ua tion might be Utter and more readily understood If Le wore to be rather closely quoted from his standpoint and la Lis language. "On our llm?, he said, "we have many a good mile that composes the whole nad. but I will couGue my knowledge and experience of i-orkiag 2tider rules anil regulations oa sta:id big between the general majager's "o:"cc and the actual operation of trains. To follow every uk and regj bitlon to the letter would make travel far safer than lying la bed. but it would be so sIotv and tedkms to the passenger t:iat the time madi In the oid days of stage lines would appear a 'filer's' time of these days. "To make from even ai. miles per hour cp to the SO reached these days cad to live up to everything pertain ing to ticw ups. grade cousins, sav ing of coal, oil and material, slow stops snd starts, reduced speed over switches and turnouts and a Lundred and one th:t:s to be remembered, would le the worst kind of folly if lurking time was a consideration. "Take my run. 1T0 m!l?s, which is on the card to be made In l hours and Tel minuter cot such a rwift gait, to be sure. aftSjocgh la wiHcr, with snow. Ice aad bad weather. It Is eome little kiu l of a Job to get around on time. To live up to every Ironclad rule, those In the book, oa the owd and various f fecials issued every day. you could not pull that run through In ten hours. and you might count yiursclf lucky if you went through upon that time. "A trainband has the choice of ei ther making bis time. for. If he Is fre quently Lite, he is either set back, sus- pendetl, Cnod or dismissed, or living rp to every rule, and. if rot found doing so in case of accident, being dismisseL Of course where no accidents occur the rules cau le tnm'pcred with and the management be blessed with ban daged eyes, but let a mishap occur, and lu order to protect themselves they Jog out the thousand or two rules, and if you are found guilty you receive an early disrnlssaL So the tral.ihand takes his desperate chances by playiag at luck, by tisiug discretion in o'.iejlag his rule, as he keeps his po sition longer than Le would through strictl carrying out eve.y one and eveutmrily Indug dismissed when the first salary day arrives. "In one book of rules upon a large road appear nearly ."i!0 regulations for the employee t familiarize himself with, or, as one' of the gcn-ral rules says: The Lead of each department must i-e conversant with the rules. supply copies of them to bis sulnirdi nates, si-e that they ate understood, en force oU'diene" to them. No one will lie excused for the vioiati in of anv of them, even though uot lucluded In those applicable to I-.is department. Ig noram-e Is no excuse for neglect of duty.' "Then f.iiiows a most remarkable clause or rck' which reads. "Every em ployee liile on d:iy connected with the trains oa any division of the road is under the authority and must con form to the orders of the superintend ent of that division.' Now. if the em ploree Las n certain order from the su pcriutc tidciii that ooiitficts with tl ose of the book, the road has him double Leaded. "To oU'v the superintendent and dis obey the rule means discharLe. as it distinctly states that 'no one wiH be ex cuse.! for the violation of any of tbetn.' while on the other hand "he must con form to the orders of the superintend ent." so he is npt to become discharged either way. but the road stands tin b!:imed ia cither case. Besides these GiCJ regulations there are numbers of ru'.cs, a" out CD forms of train orders. 4 hand and lamp signals. 17 manner of using Fignals according to the train rules. Itettidi-K ueaily llK) special rules oa time card. "Then comes the changing occasien- jily of a rule or from day to day the time of some new rule. With this the employee must learn by heart the scheduled time of borne 'S regular tniius. not to mention as mauy spe ci.'.l.s. Is it a wonder uot more aecl- Jvuts occur when one employee may be &n uu;y IS or '20 coutiuuous hours aud happens to forget Just one of these things to be remembered'" Portland (Me.) Argus. Bulled Salt Meat. The Indigestible properties of boiled lam. corned beef atid other salt meats may. according to Mrs. Parloa. the cooking exeTt. bv eliminated if the meat is sul!iclent!y boiled. The salt toughens the ti!rs. and It takes per sistent Uiiling to overcome this. The time allowed for a ten pound piece Is five hours, but as the piece are apt to !e thick rather than long one of half this v.flght would need n!out the same amount of time. The meat should be partly otoKvi In the water ra which it Is boiliil. Confirmed drunkards are shrined Into reformation ia many f the tonus of tlie Argentine BepublK? by being conv P''I!:h! to sweep the streets for rigid days each time they may be arrcsled for Intoxication. To Captatns Distinction. On one of "Old IIoss" Hoey's trip across the Atlantic tlie steamer, mov ing slowly along la a dense fog at alniut 3 o'clock In the morning, struck 4'n the roc!; oft Fatr.ct the light nut Iniug visible. Fortunately, inching more than a toa.-e fos the past-i.gers lesultod. Everybody was rooa oa deck except Hoey. who bad been having a hilarious time the night lie fore and had sh-pt all through the trouble. One of his friends sect a steward for him. and at !at be appeared, still a trllle lH-fog-ged. When the facts were explained to him. l e joined fervidly In an Im promptu praise service which the pas sengers were holding. Finally there came 9 lull In the pro ceedings, and "Old IIoss" took advan tage of it to propose three cheers and a tier fcr the captain. This proposi tion caused much astonishment, and sr.me one ventured to nsk on what grounds he based the promised honor tu the captain. I rawicg himself up to his full height "Old IIoss" replied Impressively, "tin the ground that Le is the only man sailing the Atlantic ocean who could have Lit that Infernal roc!; without a light T San Francisco Argonaut am&dk tbe Poultry. "Good morning. How do you do this morui::gr said the duck, meeting the Lea. "None of your business." replied the Lea. "You are no d.-n-tor." "Quack" squawked the duck angri ly. "That's what I said," cackled the Lei retro!t Free Press. Each day In the year the owners of slot machines la New Y'crfc city pnr thase I:) pouuds of chocolate with v hi.-h to fi1! the machines. Ia tli wcU!n2 d:-ys it cost from 5 co i to go fiotu York to LcuJox A fle ( rare Lack. The discovery of the famous Trojan mine in Calaveras county, Cal.. Is curl ens as an illustration of pure luck and doubtless Uas Leiileiied many a dh couraed niiucr. In January. !Sv15, lleury Becker, a German, and John L. Trimmer, a Connecticut man. two poor. ragged, discouraged miuiiig prospect ors. went into the mountains cf Cala veras county to cut oak wood fcr fueL The;-' exected to make sometLiag Iik t-b -ur J-IO each per month during tLe m Inter by the sale of the wood. TLcy uade their Lome in an old abandoned r:!mr's cabin. A heavy fall of snow bsd covered the ground to the depth c two or more feet One djy the two men built a great boubre of brush. The heat melted the snow and left aa area of Lot earth. Eecl.er determined-to ma'.i'e an uvea out of the Lot ground, and. securing a liaut.'cb of deer mi at he began the digging of -a bole ia which to bake it At the depth of two feet Le citae upon a lcd of rock. He Lad lieeri a prospector too long to resist the temp tation of examining the rock, and. ac cordingly, before placing the meat !n the hole be broke off a piect, of the rock. Then, after the venison wat buried end roasted, Le examined the brokeu Lit of rock carefully by the light of Lis cabin candle. To his very great aston lshmcut It proved to be what miners call live rock, assaying J?r;i0 to the. ton. For several months Becker and Trim mer kept their great Cud a secret In the mtanlime gathering Information concerning the dip angle and length and breadth of their new discovered ledge. Within a year from Its discov ery this mine Lad made Becker and Trimmer rici. Philadelphia Times. The Shark'! Moitb. Nj doubt the shark's mouth Is placed so much lieneath the projecting muz zle, under which also the coslrils lie. that il may serve Its proper purpose in the best way. In all records of the habits of the fish we are told that It can and does bite out large chunks of flesh from the dead bodies of whales and even from living victims of Its at tacks, and It is easily Keen that If Its mouibwas l13t f other fishes the necessary leverage would be lackin. A furthor reason seems to be that the shark by this peculiar position of its mouth Is compelled to turn upon its back to strike and is thus able to de liver its onset from below with more deadly effect. TIks formidable strength of jaw is backed up by a most terrible array of teeth, .of which in soma species there nre as many as six rows all around. Each tooth is saw edged and pointed. and some of the largest are as much as two inches in breadth at the base. These lie flat ngalnt-t the Jawa.and can be raised by separate muscles at wlib so that as the shark darts upon Its prey, thoy spring on end. as a cat'a claws are stuck out from its paws. This arrangement will not allow any thing once bolted to return, so that a shark's mouth Is a veritable death trap. Cincinnati Enquirer. To "Sock." This word Is In constant use la Northamptonshire. England. It has two meanings, oue being "to throw: e. g.. "I'll sock a stone at you." A fa. vorite diversion among boys Is "sock ing" Urds. They proceed along the Ledges, oue boy or more on each side all armed with stones, with which they unmercifully pelt, or "sock." any poor bird they come across. The other meau iug of the word Is "to beat or to clout;" e. g., "I'll fetch you a 6ock o' the ear- hole." I have knowu "sock" la this connec tion all my life, and It Is sometimes now used here. "I'll sock Lim," "I'll give Lim bellsock," "He got a good socking" nre common forms. A for midable fighter Is called "a bellsocl; or." "Sock" Is common when sieak lng cf "thrashings" given aud taken. "To give oue socks, meauiug "to give oue a good beating." is lu common use In East Anglia. .And so Is "pull up your socks" for "make haste" aud "set to work." A stone in the heel of a sock ortock lng is a well known extempore life pre server or taker. Notes aud Queries. . Recard For the Fas la Japaa. All over Japan you will see images of foxes old foxes, with their noses chip ped and their ears broken off; older foxes still, with a growth of moss on their backs; sly. alert foxes, with noses perked smartly In the air; great foxea and little foxes, sages and clowns, all kinds and degrees, showing the preva lence of this belief In the land of the wistaria aud the fan and also showing iu what respect the fox is held. It ia curious to uote that in ail countries t!:e fox. alnive all other animals. Las been considered to exert great lulluenc? and power. AH nations Lave legends of which the cunnlug and Intelligence of the fox are the theme. Charltr. Every good act Is charity. GiTinj water to the thirsty Is charity; remov ing stones and thorus from the road Is i harity: exhorting your fellow men to virtuous deeds Is charity: smiling In lour bnther's face le charity: nutting a wanderer in the right path is charity. A man s true wealth is the srood he does In this world. When he dies, mortals will ask. "What property Las Le left behind Lim?" But angels will Inquire. "What good deeds liast thou set Infore thee T' Mohammed. Lnrkr liealtaHon. "I never was glad for this Impedi ment In my sint-ch but once." said the man f;-ot:i Iearborn. who was In t see the towu. "".'hen was ItT' "IV-fe-fellow asked me b-h-bow nitieli I would take for a-a horse, and while III -! t-trylng to tell him s-s!::ty loII:-a he offered me a bun r!red." Won an's JournaL II (lea Drra Doae. "Po you suppose that any sort of cul tivation caa change a fruit tree Into a nut tree?" asked Cawker. "I should fhink uot." replied Ctimw. "B;;t see how the jokers ha vechnnged George Washington's cherry tree into n chestnut." Hnrjier'a Bazar. &atue lb I nat. At a woman's euchre party the other c.iy one of the fair players stopped the gime with this query: "What do they call a btcle black cat in England V A numiior of the luemlicra Lad been in England, but they all bad to give It tip. The riddle maker smiled sweetly as she trumped her partuer's ace In true traditional style. "Can't guess? Why. 'kitty. Litty"- Just tiie same as anywhere else." New York Mail and Express. Food r la at a. A wonderful reserve fund for the hu man ap;H'tite Is to be found In the feg- etiible diet of the Klamaib Indiana. A novel variety of food, forming a menu ur.known to the civilized. Is offered lo the pulp of the great yellow water lily. which Is converted Into a farinaceous food: iu the weed known as goosefoot w hich bears a black seed that is ground up for loaves and cake, and In the ar rowhead, which la the fall develo, a man by white tubr at tie end of the root. Hot a BrIVe. You aay." pursued the chairman of the legislative Investigating commit tee, -that he resorted to no bribery w Latever during the campaign, ao far a you know?" "Yes, sir." replied the witness; "that Is what I said." Tld ae not circulate several bexea of cigars?" "Yes. sir. but them cigars" wasn't l.rllH's. Here's one of 'em. You caa iiy it-CLicago Tribune. ' Vfti. t CaaoUalpa. Toting man," said a noted Illinois' congressman la the house restaurant at the capital "wl n you get achanei to 1k a consul U.r the I'nited States select a smoky city, one where there are many factory himncya. Do not try for the fashlonalle capi:aw. Leav theui for the embassadors. Go wher the air Is murky, for there business U lively, and many a consignment Is sent to th I'nited States. This means fees, and fees mean a g'xid income for the coasuL" Ia the course of h'g chat the con fTcssman ma do tlie general statement that consuls who are making the nios' money from fees are the quietest most unassuming, uncomplaining employee of the government "They do not Be up claims for a salary Instead of fees. he said. "Oh. no; but like the wise bay where the raspberries are thick they let the world forget so far as pos slide, that they are on earth. Let a consular oiik-e be changed from the fee to the salary system, and it at onto becomes alluring to a voracious lot of aspirants. Some one finds out per haps that the pob'tlcal support! of this particular consul Is weak, and tieu In fluence is used, aad soon there ia a change. "tine of the mo?? profitable consul ships Is that of LiverpooL The salary Is $i;.kjO. hut the fees bring the emolu ments up to several tlmea that amount and a generation ago the Income of t!:r consul at Liverpool was $oO,OXi a year. This Las been reduced by abolkmiag fees." rittsburg Dispatch. The 'imlnrkr Moaatalaeera. There are no more strikingly Inter esting people In America thaa these Isolated mountaineers, who make their homes generation after generation among 'the fastnesses of the eastern section of the "dark and bloody groend." The waves of civilization w!i!?b swept westward along the St Ijiwrence. the Erie canal and a dosen other routes seem to Lave found at this point ia the Appalachians aa Insur mountable barrier and rolled back. leaving the descendants of the pioneers of a century and a half ago with many of the same ar.bits and customs aud" traditions dear to the hearts of their forefathers. A man who knows the whole country as a child does his first picture book told me that If any person took the trouble to go through a copy of Shakes peare and pick out all the obsolete words he would find nearly all of them In common use among these mountain folk. In their phraseology we find "holp" for "help." "hit" for "It" and other words which, far from boing cor ruptions, ere the pure old Anglo-Saxon. Even their ballads are memories of ages gone by. and I know cf one man who. after riding 200 miles through the mouuta-ins for the purpose, finally pick ed up. from hearing the women aing them, the full 13 Terses of an old Scotch ballad which proved to be Iden tical with those recorded In a diary bearing the date !'(. International Magazine. Prnyer of a Soabrette. The p-op!e who live la 8tageland have tiie strangest ways. I sat in a box In one of the theaters one evening ar. I 1 could see Into the wings on the "prompt" side of the stage. A comic opera was on. aad I saw one of the leading women come and take her stand there In the wings, waiting for her cue. I could see her quite plainly cn 1 I watched her with curioaity, won dering if she were not cold Is the tights and thin gauze of her scant costume. The comedian began the long speech, the List word of which was to call ber on. She bowed her head, her lips moved and thrice she made the sign of the ccoss with a deroutness which left no room for doubt that she was actually praying. An lustant later she Lad frisked out on the stage with a Ltugh and a dance step and a wink that was nnythitvi but pious. Nobody seeing ber could have dreamed that just the moment before she was actually pray ingpraying for guidance la her work praying for strength to succeed, as earnestly and with just as much faith end reverence as If she well, as If she were nnythiug In the world but a danc ing girl in a comic opera. Washington Post Speech aad Ambidexterity. "Here's a scientist." she said, look ing up from the iojer, "who asserts that the reason eopIe are rljrlit Land ed Is that the motor sieeeh function controls the right side of the body and consequently right handedness grows with speech." "Is that so?" he returned, deeply In terested. "It Is Indeed strange, then, that many women can use iheir left bauds at all. Is It not?" Chicago Post "Will von have this here woman to le your Ltwful wedded wife "That's what I Mowed I would."' 'Will you love, honor and uliey ber?" "Ain't you got that switched rouu. parson?" said the groom. "John." taid the bride elect, "don'l rou reckon the parson knows bis busi ness? Answer the question!" "Yes." said the groom. "I reckon I'll lave to!" Atlanta Constitution. Aaothrr Chaaae Llkrlr. 5I!fs Breezy I see she's married again. Miss Lakeside Yes: this Is ber sev enth, anv1 I dou't think she cares very milch for Lim. Miss Breery No? Sliss I-akeshje No. I was at the en- graver's today when she left her order for ber new visiting cards. She only ordered 50. Philadelphia Press. It Is estimated that at any given timn. In Germany alone, l..fX.0tin per- bods are afflicted with consumption nrd lJ"Hrt.0t0 In America have It at all times. Professor Illrscu pronounces It emphatically a disease of all rimes, all countries and all races. Ninetr year in th penitentiary was the sentence, given Jrhn Hnyslip, a horse trainer, found guilty of murder In the second degree at Kana City, Mo. D. L Bander, heir to a 1100,000 etUln at Coitland. N. Y., Hire biinoelf in front of a train at Chicago, III , and wa killtd. AAAA A fk. i Arc your cnfcs T)f I hollow and your HOI! Ups white? Is y out appetite poor and your 4i- gestion wezk? Is your flesh soft : and have you lost ! in we'crritr ! Tries arc svmolnms nf : i , t anemia or poor blood ! : They are just as frequent : in the summer as tn the winter. And you can be cured at one time just as well as another. cf cod liver oil fviih hypo phosphites will . certainly help you. Almost everyone can take it and it will not disturb the weakest stom ach. It chanpes the light color of poor blood to a healthy and rich rrd. It nourish j the brain givrs I ! SI i ! power to toe nerves. it brtnr V back your old wcir-hi and strength. power to the nerves. it bruit (J;! All rh-ritt.. .Wc. an tjl. Borrrr h..M. chiTni.'. V- Ynri. fV W W VV v W1 Are Pals o a t k w s The Kind You Have Always Bought, and -which - In use Tor over 30 years, has borne the signature ut zp - and has been made under hi pcr- ,yAy2- sonal supervision since its infancy. Wiaf, J&UtJuAi Allow no one to deceive yo u In this. All Counterfeits, Imitations and Just-as-good" are but Experiments that trifle with and endangrer the health or Infants and Children Experience ajjainst Experiment. What is CASTORIA Castor ia is a harmless substitute for Castor OH, rare goric, Drops aud Soothhijr Syrnps. It is Pleasant. It contains neither Opium, Morphine nor other Narcotic substance. Its age Is its ruarantee. It destroys Worms and oL.ys Feverishness. It cures Diarrhoea and Wind Colic. It relieves Teething: Troubles, cures Constipatiou and Flatulency. It assimilates the Food, rejrulates the Stomach and Bowek, giving; healthy and natural sleep. The Children's Panacea Tho Mother's Friend. GENUINE CASTORIA ALWAYS Beai-3 tlie The Kind You Have Always Bought In Use For Over 30 Years. tmi ecftrrau com mm v. rr fcr-fr The Smith Premier Typewriter BEST VALUE Easy Touch. Durability. Perfect Type Cleaner. Simplicity. Double Cue Keyboard. Leadrr ia Improvements. Our Descriptive Art Catalogue Free. The Smith Premier Typewriter Company, ROEEHT S. ECULL, AGENT, SOMERSET. PA. U KTIliNAIMUl. I Biography, Geography, Fiction, etc WTint better investment coul.l l o r.iauc thaa in copy cf the International t This r-.ral quarto Vulume is a vast f tort-hou.e of Talualile infoftnntion arranged in a convenient '-i f.-r hand, eye, and mind, lit; r.;,r? v. idciv ujoiI as ttanilanl u. ' ' y than any oth-rdict:on.-.n- in tho vorlX It should L'3 in cvr L'jusoliolX m mm ""? -' ". 'T --r". :'"-T. Sbe Made It I.lkr Starch. It is true that lu In-laud, with the t'r-ad of p-wral kuov!ile aud Im proved medii-al aid, "ouri s" ami suix-r-stitions are on the wane, but Still "the uiIsthresH bottle" la much preferred lo the doctor's, and t!;a advice of a lucky woui.m" Is of much higher mi ne than that of an JI. I. Apart from the lnedii-al knowledge ret:lrel. It Is no lipht ninttt-r to undertake to ire- ecrilie for one's neighbors, as tne fol lotvinp will kIiow: "If It's plaziu to y'r honor, I'm come to ax for a bottle," said au old woman. "I was tnk that bail laxt niht I thou;!it the life "u'd lave nic." After due inquiry Into Iier symptoms she was given a packet of arrowroot. with uiiiiute directions how to prepare It. As she scarcely seemed to tahe them In. a happy thought struck the lady. "You know how to make btart.'i. don't you?" she asked. "Yes," said the eld woman. Then make It Just like that." sail her friend, "and add a little susar to It" The ol-J woman departed, to return next day with the information that she was like to die after atli. what Miss Norr.h pave her. and. with aW tine respect to her, she couldn't pet It ail down: It wlut so as'inst her. She was reijuested to bring Vit re mained f:ir lnper.:on. which revealed that the direction as to starch ha 1 been literally ensrfed out. She had put blue In It. t'crnhill Magazine. Tae Farril of Foatararbteaa. "Wo ppent the uisht In Itarldzon. paid a goodly li!l nud i-t off In the company of our English friends for the town of Kontaineblcau. lyins at the center of 5() square miles of forest." writes n girl from I'arls to The Indies' Home Journal. "It is never wild, never mysterious, this forest that thousand of artists have loved to paint, but it is calm and praud and never ted!ott9. For eipht hours we wandered ov;-r plains covered with toweiius oahs. Otuonj rooky gorge, out of which n!e:i der. graceful beeches rise, r.nd through Cliles of fngrant. giant pines. And everywhere are feathery feres and purp!e heather. "There Is not the slightest chance of losing one's way. Every gure Inch cf the forest has been mapped ois. tnd Ot the Intersection of every two ave- nuis a red hand points to the town. and a blue hand Indicates the direcx tlon of one of the 'sights.' And I'on tainebleu? We saw only the palace, n bewildering maze of magnificent rooms. Everywhere there was rich Dens, everywhere woud-rful frescoes, wotdo.-ful stairways, wonderful tapes try, wonderful inlaid furuiture. The grondeur is oiipresslve. and we were glad to get out Into the park, to wau- oer about In the differeut courts." Man t as full of good and evil as an egg is full i f meat II A. Ken la!l. The same vices w hich are huge aud insupportable in o'hers we do not feel lo ourselves La Bniiete. Wa f illllall tliuu;j be cirauubes. Q$-TtXXX F!t's rrtavii V VJr. elrne. iwtur. atut ht-; 'r' ?! ilia cMeu mcuiuraiia. Jtcnw?tatarrhn lL-iv 4 itriy a ia u. UiJ quick j. ivn.arr.i Cream Calm is Occed Into the nostr'n, forndi orr tha mciiibrxaa sxd is ssotbed. Ee iif is inv. BUMliste scj csnt toiietrL It is sot rricgl.ri not produce tncezJig. Large Siro, W cents at (U: of by Ksii; ItjJ Size, 10 cents be mal'u Y BOTHKBS, II Warm Street. Kew To t v"5S':,n'f'' ? D)f1rt li! t? " r Signature of muwnmv Tctrr. NrwvoM errr. TRITiNG MACHINE. ..... Uniform Vork. Scientific Construction. Rapidity. Easy to Learn. Beauty of Design. ff Mechanically Superior. ml Al:-.o Vccstrr's Colirjiat; Dictionary xr:th n Poottbh r-a ' - ' -V' : ! s-z-.r ; r tr ': -'-T' T.'X- . - -.." "".1 'OMERSET MARKET UK FORT 7 iiiiir.i! fiim m Cook & Becrits, WelnavJaif Fb. 2Sth. ( pri bn.... i drti. ; . I viKral1 aVSV 4 Apple tuner. pr al I rll jwr tt Butter. - frwh k, per 9 iermn.rry, per lb...u Beswax pt-r t , .... Jn .Ik Jtr A .country ham. pt-r b 10 U 1-V r, l nirr curt-. 1 hmiu, per J H-u i iu-, p. r m to ptmuidt-r, pr R) M to wnste navy, per lo . t'.Ou to f.' i I'iniR, pr m i , . ..... nUNtr.l, pfT V lAJol-- CofTt. in 1 I,n.uii, per bl.l fcL.it. to 4.H t ornmeHi. iwr b il. I t-t. pei uox . pei Ji ! 1h.Ukeherrinr 'i per 7i "-.' 7.1 i 1 V I'l'l p-r:)aia5 Hony, wlilteclover.per jir . J-ir', fr n 7 to 11. j 1,'Hie, IHT('Ol. : J M 1 1 t N. il., pr k - j Ont n., p-r hu... til To 7 V ; rniaux, per bus V) to Ue : reaches, evuporated, per fc. Zj& U) . 1 ruiip. tv r m q 0 11 r . 1.. pt-rnnt t ru r;, p-t t.hl . j - Imiry, W tua iw-k Zll .TIl.i " X " " " 4 bns wrhi Salt, cmnna iiniii. a oaek tir map:e.fr E 7 tolue in: iM,rii y ci.inr, per B . Ac wiiite. A. per ft . vj,. Sngar. i ub-. or pulvonsed, per ft St per eai inaDie. per mil tnit. Syrnp. stoneware, irlloa . , Thllnw, per 16 Z Jt iV Vicegar. rr eil T..r 2) U. -V- iimoifiy.per hi:s. JI .vi ciovr, p.-r bn .. ..VO lo 8 00 crimson, per lus ' lf:ii.X Pr bus sUvke. Dee hns "" Millet, :Tmsn, per bin 3 f ourlfy. white t-a rr! !es., prr'bnC 1 ST I bivk-h-at per rn Oraii i eorn srieH-rt. per bn... is t.T 1 i iwiji, pr r bos -3 t I rye. twr bus ,vy A Peed wtnt, prr hu I bran, prr R y. I i-orn nii'1 ot olii p. pr li ibi'.. KV fit-ar. niiej-nmrennT.p hM . Flonr. I 44 spring patent anil "bnry i Meh rude . 50 I Sour, lowersrad dm tail- ri -i in Midrtlick-s. I "hlie. pr 10 !b. .v -u.auiic.-s. j fe1 pr iu0 j,. Kc CONDENSED TIME TABLES. B-Unmore and Ohio Ra 'roc. Somerset tnd Cambria Branch. WOHTBWAarj. Jobnatown Mill Kxnr.-. RorKwrwyt a. hi.. mhi er -t ru7, Suivwiiiw. booe rrxviile li:f Jounvtown p. m. Johnstown Aeeommi1i.tlnnv Knckwood 4 p. m., Konierwt in! stoyetnwD a-Ul, Uoot- ervliief:, J hn-h wr ). mrTww e. Ms!l. Johneu.m n l ?..m..Hove .villeHOS sieUwn S li. iorueret to2 Hockwood 101.. Kxpr.s. Johnstown 1 .V) p. m, Foovervtl l,T'lowri . 47. Soroaniet J-15, Hock- I-aily. r F. II. CNDFKWOOD. D. B. MARTIN enejal Manager. Fawtenicer Traffic Manaicer. pFJS-NSXV.AJS-IA ILVIXROAD. lltTf- ST0 Till . IM EFFECT NGV. 13, IES9 Trt ns -rrl v. .nfl il r. i .... i follow. WSSTWaBD. Wen.rti Ftp-.... . .. , , SnDlhwi;T tspr nhnown AoiinimixlHlir.nI JhnMn-rn .reirnmoUfatioo Z t' u-liie E-pre.... -"sy iH s ngr .' """ Pltntburg bxpreui J :t r..i 1 6:V2 arK. :0 p. m. 4 K in FhkI l.lne. j'.i JcUi'Howd AccommotUYon!II Vanted An Idea o ran think ei mrtmm thin lo pMe.tr rev.. W..hl.g iCVthea1 .TL"".' Snyder's j It rf suircs a good selected rw m WW uu WtMAVLDUlMUf 1 MEM. Pure Drugs Lr'rCt1: fresh and good condition. In the way of Prescription we are sure to have it. Ton Optical Goods Truces Fitted. All of the kept in stock. Satisfaction JOHN N. Druggist. LOUTHER'S DRUG MAIN STREET, SOMERSET, PA. Th's Model Pros Store is rapidly leccming a great fa write i ;. People in Search of FRESH AND PURE DRUGS MEDICINES. DYE STUFFS. SUPPORTER SP0MGES. TRUSSES TOILET ARTI CLE:. FEHFUMES. ETC. TM DtJCTOIitlVU PEBHOaAl. ATTEHTIOJI TO TUB COMPOCSD1M0 OF LoutliBr's FresGiiptionsi Famili Eeceiri OBBAT C1U IIBJBO TAB Kit TO CS1 OKLT FRBSH AS Pr BI ASTICLrS. Spectacles, Eye-Glacses, And a Full Line of Optical GockL alvays on hand. Frorr s;c large assortment all can be suited- THE FIEEST BBiiEDS OF CIS.GES A lwajs "on land It is always a tending purchasers, wLcther tLey buy from us or el.-e-litre. J. Kl. LOUTH ER M. D. MAIS STREET - - SOMERSET Elias Cunningham, M A HUrA'TTBEB AD OBALTB A.WO WHOUSALI ASH RjCTAILI OP Lumber and Building Materials. HARD AND SOFT WOODS, Oak, Pvplar, sl llns. Pleatti. I t-M i; Walnnt, Ifellsw rine. Hairing. SaMh. Mtai RaJta- Cherry, HblnKlrs, Doors, Balnnlert. tlie.innt, tath, White Pine lillndm Xewel PoK A general llntof aU eradea of Lamber and Balldlng ateiial and Koof.nir "'' (lock. Alao, can ntrnUb anrthinx In the Una of our bURlnem toord. r with nuc bl prompLceaa, inch a Brackets, oddlse(-rork Jtf. Elias Cunningham, Office and YaM Opposite H. tc C.R NEARLY Fifty-eight ri . M0NDV. WEDNESDAY, PR ACT 'C A! LY A DAILY AMD THE CHEAPEST KlOWM. York rn-wc:kl Trituno A rm and ieinnrkxt.lT uttrnrtiva pnlv icfilion, rrr-fiiwl v lllu-lrxli-d wiih n.r- trii and half-inne : mr tHif.. nil tha Mrikinjr frmi ofthf. hi!v Tri- huna. Xr.wixl War i.ritt-lim. UtitiieH tic nl Korefgn "orreixinilnc". Short Storiwi, Huinnniu Illn-tr-'I'-p-, InrliM Irial Informntinn. FnHhion N"t-. Airri illtnral nmttern rarpfuMv trpt. ami l'oniirehpn'v unit Hflm1.!- tinxtu-ial and Miirket Uorw. It is m Hrit atw.-me nonr as the clml wtition. r'-he a lares proportion of n Iwri I pn on Htoof imup find each fdiiion it a 'ior.nlrhlr uNiv dat daily family newspaper fur busy pwiple. Regular ButiweriptloD prii-a 1.50 jer year. We furnish it with tha HKRALD for S2 50 per year. Send al! Orders to the $2 50 per year. it win PAY TO BUT TOCB Memorial Work or WM. F. SHAFFS. BOMERET. FEXS'A. Mana5unarrof and Dwiler In ern Work Fnrnlnhed oa Bnort Jfotle sieeu in aim ran Alao, Agent for the WHITE BRONZE t , nnA it .Z .C V. " .""Bnmeni work win Ond it to their Int-rt to call at my .how tHaiUlartioii gunrnleed !n every ea. a Pricea very ,w. 1 tuvite upecia! alteuUoa Whfte 2ri Cp Port Zino McMtsrts. 'nd wh,r5, """"I to b ti.e Pharmacy, stock and a neatly arrand , ' urisa, uusirjesa. ! are always sure of getting te Ct best and most approved Truij k guaranteed. SNYDER, SOMErtSKT.IW pleasure to dirplay cur good to z - - SOMERSET. Pi K Xttl, r0IEEn Years Old!! Hew York PUBLISHED 0l T HO RS 3'- ... ;ir-.iht Weekly XribUne for farmer. .uJvii'' whoa reader- have reprc-i:ted tb best element of our country pV li gives a!l important ni-v o: f tb tion and World, the nit nfiin' UeMirt" Rerort". Fascinatinc Sh-rt M uneicelled Atfriciiltural VtF-'"' Scientific and Me.-liaiii.al Ii.formp Kahion Articles for the Women, B- ruorou Illustration-. fr ' nJ your,( It is "The People Tape."' '' lU m:" United States. Regular subscription pri.-e, per year. We furnish it ith the 11 KI!-lLn r $2 00 per yta. HERALD, Somerset, Fa. E01CR3ED BY SCESTISl'S AS HiCTICiLLYh ( aa, . 1 "eaJBaiV " or coo l;vI"l , Beautiful Deslsns. STORE, fL3T3 1 J -.1 if I Wm. F. Shafter. -nr wti'-t-fr
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers