Mukin Chaise For Two Fifty. . It vts only a little $2.50 RoMpIec. fcnt it it surprising the amount of trou ble a little thing can sometimes make. The young man Lad Landed it to the cashier in the restanrant and wan wait ing for bin change, hi le behind him vere two" or three other jojil waiting f him to pet oat of the way. But cashiers are methodical, and, fur thermore, nine-tenth of them have euie certain vray of making change that in c.lvcs deaLng in even dollars, as a geu c al thing. No matter what the size? of the bill, they take the aniootit of the jurchara out of the first dollar, if it is t. -Lw that Cgnre, and then laud over the rot of the money in dollars or bills of larger denomination. That was what puzzled this cashier. "Oh! Two dollars and a half !" the paid, vhile ehe was trying to make a mental calculation, according to her nsnal system. "That's what it is," replied the yotnig man. "Of course," she returned, tli'rping it into the drawer. "Check, 40 cents," nud the counted out 60 cents in order to get on the dollar basis as soon as possi ble, after her usual fashion. "One dol lar, two dollars, three dollars no, that's not right." .She was red in the face as she drew the money back and bf-gan over again, realizirg that the paltry half dollar in the guldpicce had thrown ber financial fysti in out of order. She made tbrfe trials before the got the right amount el change on the coun ter, and well, if you don't llieve that 2 ffuhkii.ve will "inock out" the average "lightning change" cashier, try it seme time and yon win te convinced. Chicago Post. Wby lie Was Aritatod. A ftotch tradesman, who" had amass ei, as he believed, 4,000, was surpris ed at his old clerk ehowitg by a balance thw-t that his fortune was 6,000. "It cauna Le; count again," said the old man. The cleik did cuunt again, and again declared the balance to be tti.OUO. The martrr himself counted, and he also brunght out a clear balance of 0, OuO. Time after time he cast up the col umns; it was still a C, and -net a 4, that rewarded his labors. So the old merchant, on the strength of his good fortune, modernized bis Loose and put money in the purse if the carienter, the painter and the upholsterer. Still, how ever, he had a lurking doubt of the ex istence eJ the extra '2,000; so one win ter night he sat down to give the col umns "one count mere" At the ckke of his task lie jumped up as thcugh he Lad been galvanized, and rurJied out in a shower of rain to the Louse cf the clerk, who, capped and drowsy, put out his head from an attic window at the Sound of the knocker mumbling. "Who's there, and what d'ye want?" "Jle, ye scoundrel !" ex claimed his employer. "Ve've added the year of our Lord amang tbepoous!" Scotsman. She Was Kot Booky. They were standing close by one of the bcekcases up at the library. He was thin and studious hiking, and she was buxcm and brainless, but evidently Lent cu impressing her escort. "How do yon like 'People We Pass?' " he ask ed as be turned over the leaves of a book of stories of life among the masses cf New York city. "Well, you know," she began, "I really don't pay much at tention to them unless I see a real hand some dress, or some man more distin guished than another. I expect I am rather heedless," she added hurriedly, as she saw a tired look come into his face. Then he picked up another book. "Iam extremely fond of 'Beauties cf Buskin,' aren't you?" "Indeed I am." she replied heartily, feeling that she was lit last on safe ground. "But I don't know yet which I most admire his eyes or Lis hair!" And then he said, "Let'a go." Washington Star. Congressman Bailt-js Drill. Congressman Bailey cf Texas thus re plies to recent criticisms of his dress: "I have always held that society had no riri;t, by its dictum, to regulate the style of a man's clothes. Ever since I ceroid afford it, I have dressed just as I do today. I have worn the same black broadcloth Euit, cut in the same style ; the same style of broad shirt front and a white tie ; the same kind of collar and broad black felt hat I wear these clothes regardless cf the day of the week or the hour or of society's dicta tion because I believe they become mc, and they please my wife. There is a rule of society which prescribes that a dress suit shall not be worn nntil after 6 o'clock in the evening. If I chose to wear a dress suit, I would feel free to put it on in the morning or eve ning, or at noon, just as the fancy dictated. It seems to me that the society rule which attempts to regulate a man's dress is autocratic. The rule prescribing dress originated in the old customs of the court nobility. We are simply imitating these oll aristocrats when we bar a per son out of society because be does not dress ic the fashion. If men show ed more independence in the matter of dress, they would soon be able to break over the society restraints, and after that anybody could wear whatever he chose to, so long as he conformed to the law of the land and wr.ro something. So far as I am conccruf d, I shall con tinue to wear whatever suits me and at the same tima meets the approval cf Staple, Eaattaple. In Anglo-Saxon the word "stapol," "stapel" cr "stapnl" denoted a jot cr pillar of wood cr stone. In local names it Las various significations. Such posts cr pillars were often erected to maik places where markets were held. r w here merchandise cculd be expired fr.r sale. Such probably were Dunstaplc. in Bedfordshire, a market oa the ehalk downs, and Barnstaple, ia Devon. Sometimes the stapel was a post mark ing the place cf the hundred moots. Wo have hundreds called Barnstaple and Thurstable in Essex, and one called Staple in Sussex. There are seven places called Stapletcn, but as none of them is a market town they were probably merely farmsteads marked by a post, cnecf them, called Stapled an in Domes day, being a hill with a post So cf the nine Staple! ords none is a marked town, and they were probably fords marked or protected by piles or posts. Stal bridge, Dorset, called Staplebridge in Domesday, was probably a trestle bridge. Whites-table in Kent mut have taken its name from a white pillar, erected either for a market cr as a guide to ship entering the harbor, or to which boats could be moored. Staplehurht must have been a wood matked by a Iostf or, like Stockwith, a wood where stumps or posts were left standing. Notes and (Queries. Was Too (Sharp For Thrm. One day last winter a stylishly dressed vrcmau stepped from a coach in front cf a lig cry goods store in New York and proceeding to the fur department select- - td a real wrap worth foeM). In payment i-he tendered a check for $1,000, which tl.c saieswemun tock totLecflice. A sressetger was dispatched to the bank, ii;el Le was told that the cheek was gfd. Meantime the woman pretended lobe indignant, demanded a return of the check, would accept no apologies ' jnd drove away. Presently she returned und said the Lad allowed Ler temper to cverecme Ler and ordered the cloak wrapjed up. She was given (700 in change and disappeared. A second visit to the bank disc Jos d the fact that the woman had withdrawn the $ 1,000 she Lid on deposit there and that the check' jvaa worthless. Cood and IiL Accustom yonttelf to submit on every occasion to a Email present evil to ob tain a greater distant gcod. This will give oVci.sicn, lone and energy to the luisd, whkh thes disciplined will often rcop victoiy from tieluit find honor fiom repulse. Coltou. Hew th Isit Juror Was Won. Dr. Ktert D. Sheppard, business agent of the Northwestern' university, relates a story of bow Le ence won a lawsuit which illustrates the manner in which lawyers foinctines adapt them selves to their juries. "There was no question," said Dr. Sheppard, "but that I was in the right of the case. The evidence was conclu sive, the law was on my side, and when my attorney arose to make hi rpeuing "address he thought he had the mse won. He briefly reviewed the evi dence, stated the law in the case, and was about to close his arnment when he noticed tbt one of the jurors, a stolid old farmer, did not seem to be with him. The other 11 men Lad already de cided the case in their own minds, but the farmer had a 6luggish, set expres sion on his countenance which bofad no good for me cr my case. Again my law yer reviewed the evidence, addressing his remarks entirely to this one man, but uo impression was made The same stolid expression still ocenpied the man's face, Rud fce seemed as little likely to be moved as the courthouse in which the trial was taking place. The attorney tried all kils of arguments, and final ly, when Le was about giving up in de spair, a happy thought struck him. He repeated again the bare facts, and when he came to a place where the person op posing me Lad made an egregious error in judgment be leaned over to the old farmer and said : ' " 'And I want to toll you, my friend, that there's where be dropped Lis water melon. "The old farmer's face lighted up. and from that moment the c:o was won. The jury was out Joss than live minutes and brought back ft verdict for ull tliat I had asked." Chicago Chronicle. It Was In IBs. IU1L That reminds me cf a story they tell about Rudyard Kipling indeed, I won't be sure that it isn't he who tells it He 6taid at a hotel ence upon a time, in Montreal, I think it was, and when he came to go away he asked for the landlord. The landlord appeared. "I wanted to see you," 6aid Mr. Kip ling, "because yon are a wonderful man. I have never known your equal. I Lave sojourned in Lotels all around the world. I have never seen one like this." The landlord swelled with pride. He intimated that the thing was really nothing when yoa knew how to do it He was in a seventh Leaven of delight Mr. Kipling waited till Le neared earth again. Then he resnmed : "I want to tell yoa that cf all the ho tels under the shining sun I have never seen cue that for unmitigated, all round, unendurable discomfort could not even be named in the same day with yours." fcAnd when Mr. Kipling's bill was made out, one item in it read, "To im pudence, f3." But what's $3, when one has spuken one's mind? Washington Post. No Chance For the Judge. At Harrodsburg one day Judge Card well summoned a negro boy in his court to testify in a case. The following con versation then took place between his honor and the boy : "Do you know good from bad?" "Yes, sir, boss, 6'peo er duz." "Can ycu distinguish the truth from falsehood?" "Yes, sah, I kin extinguish truth or anything eke eff you'll gimme nun wa ter." "Do you know what will become cf you if you testify to a lie?" "No, sah, jedge. Duz you?" "Where does the devil live?" "You'll neber git to see him. He lives in heaven." Louisville Courier Journal. Lrt t s Hope They Got a Good Dinner. When Hall Caino first came to this country, he was Invited to Philadelphia by an old friend and fellow Manxman. A New York litterateur who found him self in the Quaker City attended a dinner at which all the 12 guests were talking about the expected lion and his books and looking forward to meeting him. The New York man confessed to know ing Mr. Caine's books only through re views, and asked the lady at his right which one cf the novels he should read first She answered that she was in the same predicament. The questiou finally went aronnd tho table, and the com pany laughed to discover that only one person bad ever read cne of Mr. Caine's books. Chicago Times-Herald. Cniqae Mail Serriee.. The inhabitants of the small group cf islands situated on the south of Iceland possess a very curious method cf com munication in their so called "bottle post." When the wind blows from the south and one of the islanders wishes to communicate with the mainland, Lo puts Lis letters into a well corked bot tle, and to insuro their delivery he in closes at the same time a plug or twist of tobacco or a cigar. The wind speed ily impels the bottle to the shores of the mother island, where people are usually on tho lookout who are willing to de liver the contents cf the bottle in return for the inclosed remuneration. People Who Patronise Banks. Thero is cue savings bank hero which fcceps an accurate recoid cf the calling of its depositors. During the last year there was only one actor on the list, while there were 1,302 tailors; there was but cue editor, while there were T23 lalxners ; thero was but cue board ing bouse keeper and 33" iddlers. There were lota cf shoemakers, bakers, bar'urs, waiters, cigar makers, bnt very few musicians, liquor dealers, lawyers cr policemen. Chicago Tribune. A MinliiE rtory. A young ms:n returned home frcm a trip to J Li LLtstuig for Lis health, and in Lsiiatiig his udventures he told abett l.cy:tg a liivtr mine for 3,CC0. 1 l.tiw they'd tcpe ycu in!" ex claimed tLe eld man. "Set you were ass tnocgh o Ley a LcmLr.g mine." "Yes, lut I didn't loe anything. I fein.ee a rcmpai y, :;r.d sold Lalf the fcttck to a man fer "7,000." " Y-ycn eliel !" gasped the old man as he turned white. "I'll bet I'u the one who bought it" "I know you tie," coolly observed the ycuugmau as he crossed Liu legs and tried to appear very much at Lome. Pearson's Weekly. f ond of Bathing. In the mountains cf Japan, wherever Lot springs cccuncd, the natives re torted to them, either cn account cf their supposed curative properties, or simply to kill time. This taste for bath ing seems almost to tmccnt to a vice, and in cue place known to the lecturer a man would stay iu the water fur prsc tically a mouth at a time, takicg the pre caut ion to place a hoay stcuc on Lis knees to keep him frcm floating or turning ever in his sleep. The care-taker of the inn.e bath, an eld man cf TO, staid in the water tho whole winter l hrcngb. Chumheis Jcr.ruaL A Clitcge Id the Title. Maud (emilingly) So yen saw the profound Low I got frtru htndst me Har ry Erown? He's jest fcruduated frcm wi agricultural college with Lib honors as a veterinary surgeex. Ethel Yes; so C- laelys toM me. It's a teeret, but she's e igaged to Le married to bim. Maud (with sudden asperity) Huh! A cow doctor! Lcndcu Tit-Bits. fche Endarea More. A recent lecturer says : "Fewer wom laeoiEniit suicide than men. This is be cause woman makes less protest against her circumstances cf life, lias more en durance under its calamities and is more resigned." Why dots she -protest less and endure more? Lj it merely a matter .,f Labit? She Saw a Scoirl Then. Minnie I never noticed before that this mirror bad a wrinkle in it. Mamie I thought you were able to o wrinkles in ary mitror yea looked int a Indianapolis Journal. The Lion's Kotia. Dr. TJrinestone noted the odd blanceof the liou's roar to that of the ostrich. Mr. Millais says that though the roar of the latter la not so loud, it bus exactly the same tone as that of the lion. Bat the ostrich always icm hia best, the lion very seldom. This is part ly because a "good" rear neeels a great physical effort The whole interior aiid muscles of month, thniat, stomach and abdomen are, for the moment, converted Into nn organ of teirific sound, and the sound does make the earth tremble or appear to do so. But the attitude is not that usually drawn. Unless Le roars ly ing down, when Le puts Lis Lead op, like a dog bulking, tho lit n "emits bis first moan in any position, then draws in his neck and lowers Lis head with extended paws, right down to Lis fore paws, as if about to be violently rick; while at the same time the back is arch ed, and the w hole animal bears an ap pearance of concentrated strain. " This is Captain Millais' phonetic ren dering of the sound, taken when listen ing to three lions roaring their best : "Moan roar r o-a-r roar roai roar grunt grunt grunt grunt (dy ing away)." Why lions roar, when it ought to pay better to keep silent, in not yet explained. General Hamilton was convinced that tigers hunting in com pany roar to confuse and frighten the deer. Possibly the lion roars, when prowling around a camp, in the hope of causing 6ome of the draft animals to break loose; at other times it appears to be a form of conversation with others at a distance. Loudon Spectator. Llneola Gave Bim a Pass. Old Michae l Malloy, a Morris canal boatman, tells a story of Lincoln. He said that be bad deserted from the rebel army, and was in Washington iu 1864. His half brother, John Reiley, was a prisoner in the old capitol prison m Washington. "I wanted to see Jack badly," said MalU'y, "but the provost marshal wouldn't let me pass in. I stooel near the White House when I saw Old Abe and Secretary Stanton walking together on the other side cf tho .street. Says I to myself, 'I'll s-o what Abe'll do,' and I goes ever uad bowa with my hat in my baud. " 'Well, ry goid man, Fays Abe, 'what ca:i I !o for you?' "I uis a:id tells him bow the provost mar.-):il pav-- mo tho marble heart, and Staui'Xi move ! en whilo Abe pulls a pa per niid i c: '.-il from Lis pocket and write: "Lit t-:s i..a fci'c hu half brother. "A. Liscxl. "I was" t f lad that I didn't stop to thank the p:rsii'.ii;t Let you bet your lifti I passed into the prison. It 'ud done your heart gnod to see that provost mar shal Low ar.d scrape to mow hen I hand ed bim Old Abe's note." New Yejrk Press. Sew Tork Police. One day I saw a boy throw an erple across Ann street at auother, but it miss ed the boy and broke a window. A po liceman came rushing ncress and seized a lad standing iu a doorway and the wrong boy alte.get ber. As he was drag ging him away tho victim appealed to me and I stcpied forward and said : "Officer, the boy who threw the applo ran toward Broadway. This boy" "Come along with me!" interrupted the peeler. "What for?" "For obstructing an efftor while making an arrest!" I went w ith him to the station house, and it was exactly 40 minutes before I could convince the captain that I was innocent cf any intent to obstruct and secure my liberty. Yon can think what you will of a New York policeman, but don't try arguments or explanations. New York Cor. Detroit Free Press. Echoes From Dorses Sknlls. Those curious twists and turns super stitions take are to be found in the in troduction cf horses' skulls in or about the church buildings in England and Scotland, tho reason alleged being to help the sound iu church. This habit is unquestionably a relio of Leathenism where an animal was sacrificed. Some years ago, when an old meeting house in Edinburgh was pulled down, the sounding board space above the pulpit was found to be filled with horses' skulls. Iu some parts of England there 6till exists the idea that if a horse's head is buried in a field there will be an echo. Pick Me Up. Ber Triumph. Mrs. Bricktcp ( bursting with pride) How d'yo like my new carpet, Mrs. Crossseye? Mrs. Crosse ye (bursting with envy) It's er very nice indeed, Mrs. Brick top, fer fer brussels. By the way, I nearly forgot what I came for. I wish you would lend me your lawn mower a few moments. "Lawn mower? Why, certainly. But what cn earth can yea want of a lawn mower at this time cf the year?" "I desire to thin down our velvet car pet in the nursery r. littles. The children sre always losing their marbles in it" Loudon Answers. A Sure Thine. First Detecdve Ha! Through the aid cf the press we will capture cur man. I see it hera Ho cannot escape. Second Detective What Lave you in the paper? FirEt Detective A picture of the hon.-e in which the man who saw the man who lecka like the prisener lives. The guilty guy will surely be caught now! Cincinnati Tribute. Mr. Grabber's Advice to Philip. "It i-n't new, tho idea cf living with in one's iaccme," faid Mr. Gratebar, "bet I i'VA trying to impress on Philip tho importance tf beginning in Lis youth. I don't want Lira to Le mean or stingy, t ut I do want him to eavo some thing every year, without interruption, and to begin vb.rn Le is ycung. Begun early and fcept up ccntinuou)y, it is al most woudoif ul how even small savings accumulate There is fcarcely a man w ho cannot proviele himself with a mod erate fortune frcm Lis savings aleine by beginning early and keeping ct it "Old? Of course it's eld ; eld as the hills, but Low many of cs Lave profited ly it? And I want Philip to begin liow." New York Sun. A Posfuble Explanation. Why was St Andrew selected to be the patron snict cf Scotland? Thisques lieu Las exercised cleiical and lay curi osity, but Las not been satisfactorily an twered unless the explanation offered by the archdeacon ef Calcutta at a din ner which Lo attended on St Andrew's day beccrfirmed asfiuaL "Gentlemen," ho said, "I have give n this difficult rub jeet my thoughtful consideration, and I havo come to the conclusion that St. Andrew was chosen to bo the patron taint tf Scotland lecauso Le discovered tho hid who bad the loaves end fishes!" London Telegraph. The first ropemakers were the spiders, which spin a thread so fine that, al though it is composed cf 50 cr CO strands, it is a dozen times nial!cr than the finest thread spun by the Lauds ef men. Blood in its natural stato contains a surprising amount cf pure air, amount ing to nearly seven-eighths cf its entire bulk. Qaerr Combination. Tho Man Behind Pare'.cn me, miss, I can sc nothing cwing to ycr.r hat Tho Woman la Frect Tice! There is nothing owiug. I havo paid for it in fulL Philadelphia Record. "jay w;io is a woman wno is Tery hard to plewe. " - "Sho Las never given any evidence of it." Detroit Free Press. Tho com men lotus was the most sa cred Cower cf the Egyptians. Its repre sentation is everywhere found on their monuments. Jht Nape of The Keck There have Lven students of icnthetles w ho claim the loveliest thing in nature was the nape of a pliape'ly neck. I low ever that may bo, say a New York HWi w riter, there i certainly noth ing letw attrae'tivethan the .back "of the neck, wbieh some well-meaning, but misguided, women display to the worlel in their evening gowns. It U not shapely; it is not white, and its natural defects are intensified by the manner in which the back hair is arranged. High collar are largely aeexHintal.le for the yellow condition of many licckn. The reel line which the line-n vllar leaves, elarkcns and becomes discolored. To counteract this the neck should be bathed each night with warn waternnd soap, and while still warm and moist thoroughly massaged with a teaspoon ful of pure olive oil. Ih the morning the neck should be thoroughly washed with coLl water and rubljed gently with a seft towel for a few minutes. ThU courwe whitens thekin, makes it firm and fills out un gainly hollows. - e - Your pains would go, and a ruddy glow Your cheeks would know. If you would take, (a noteplease make). For health's dear sake. The remedy that did for me Such wonders great, I beg to state that Dr. Pierce's Favorite Prescription is the one thing that can and eloes cure the derangemenfsef the female system. It is woman's great regulator. I f every woman who sutlers from disease jeciilinr to her sex knew of its wonder ful curative projterties, a chorus of re-jeMe-.ingwenilel be heard throughout the length and breath of the land, singing its praises. Fer nursing mothers and' debilitated "run-elown" women generally, it is the greatest restorative tonic and soothing nervine known. For the aleut to limmie mothers it is indeed a priceless bexn. It lessens the pains and perils of child birth, shortens parturition, promeite-s the seTre-tiou ef an abunelance' of nour ishment fer the child and shortens the period f confinement. Jizbro What kind of a fellow is that stationer on the corner? Gazney I understand that he'd have a splendid reputation if it weren't for his weekly iKTUMcuU.JiOJibri Ga it tt N Mrs. Hiram Duly (engaging coek) IIew are you on faii-y dishes? Bridge t Brittle-ware Jut as aisy as Oi can lie, Imum, but the plaugue-y things will break semietiiues. Park. Wife I don't sec anything immodest in the suit, elo you, IJobeTt ? HuslKind No as long as you ke-cp out ef it. Idfjirr'n Ji'izar. Dick You would marry the biggest fool in 'the world if he asked you, wouldn't you? Maud O, Dick, this is so sudden Sew York World. "The Democratic outlook for 1W " U-gan the hopeful one. "I fe-ar there will be nothing but nn inlook," said the experienced one. "Got to be on the inside to have an outloek." Iiilitinoto!iii Journat. 'Yield not to Misfortune.' I was aftlie-tcd with catarrh last autumn. During the month of October I could neither taste r sme ll and could he-ar but little. Ely's Cream Balm curcei it Mare'us Ge-e. Shautz, Hall way, N . J. I suffered from catarrh of the worst kinel ever since a boy, and I never hoped for cure, but Ely's Cream Balm set ms to elo even that. Many acquain tances have useel it with excellent results. Ose-ar Ostium, 4" Warren Ave., Chicago, 111. The stable is a foul place unless kept perfectly clean. The liquid ma nure epiekly de-compeises, and the re sult is ammonia gas, which goes to every portion of the building. It is a mistake to dry out the bedding to lie used again, as straw is cheap and the bedding should lie renewed with clean material every day. Pleasant to take, positive and instant in its results, in fact, the best cough medicine in the worlel, Dr. Wood's Norway Pine Syrup. Perfect Wisdom Woulel give us perfect health. Because men and woiiien are not perfectly wise, they must take medicines to keep themselves perfectly healthy. Tuiv, rich blood is the basis of good health. Hood's Sarsaparilla is the. One True Blood Purifier. It gives goexl health because it builds u.Hn the true found ationpure bleiod. Hood's Pillt ere purely vegetable, jRTfcctly harmless, always reliable and beneficial. The Satirical Stern Parent "Yeur daughter loves me," insisted the imiR-ctmious youth, "and you re fuse to le-t her have a huhund ef her own choosing. Yet you say you weuld deny her nerthiiig." "That," said the eld man grimly, "is exae-tly w hat I anideiug." Truth. IS IT SURPRISING T!::r; Arc So Many Skeptics When Ycvcn iL2tc!iicnts Are So Scarce? Whet's the difference between a state riert not proven and a fact? Let's size it c; in a plain, every-elay manner. Someone in Chicago makes a public state Uici.t which comes to you without further cu lorseuiert. Is it proven conclusively to you ? We think not But supposing a i;:an in your county, in your town; a i:iai. you kuow alout, perhaps know per cocKy. and know that Lis word is as fno.1 cs his note, makes a declaration, fiovsn't it conic pretty close to being a fact? ThU is the kind of evidence we t.-ive fjr skeptics, and the kind we give vou here. Mr. John II. Kennedy resides !n Washington. Pa., at ?S4 North Main tre-et. lie has been Deputy Sheriff of the comitv for dozen years, and the not veritably skeptic cannot doubt what ; :.- s.iv: read it. We tell it here as lie I )'. I it to our representative. Said he: "I iir;vc been a sufferer for some lime r!t wit'j kidney complaint. I have a pain rcross the small of my back near tUe hips. It was more severe morning an 1 evening. I would arise in the tno:n ii: f'.-eliug as thongb 1 had not hail n;ht's rest at all. I noticed n adver tist:ietit e.f Doan's Kidney Pills anj K::!t to L. S. Yowell's "drug store, where I procured a 1hs. I have now been c that remedy for some time. ml I c n lione.y sav that they have done me a jirint ileal of good. I re:-t better at ti;ht and. ia fect foel better iu ererr r since I lierjao taliinj them. I a:u sifsd:'.-,- improving anJ expect tc r-on be .--t:-rc-d to rcy normal eonditin. I tt-i-uM gladly tccorcinend Tioan's Kidney 1'i.ls lu any one sufferin-j frcm ) fiji of kidne-y complaint. I hse known oihtr who ue them and speak highly cf their merit as I feel Ui-t i can." (Signed Jvo. TI. KENNErv. Doha's Kidney l'i',1 ate for sale bv rll dealers, price 50 cents per 1x. TlaiK J .v 1-ostcr-Miiburn Co., CuiUo, N. Yn j cole octiU for the U. S. ' Thinji Taat Are Told. A gexxl mixture for lawn grass: One half bushel Kentucky blue grass, one half bushel red top, four ejuarts timothy, one ejuart white clover, . one quart alsike. The fifty-sixth annual fair of i:ie New York State Agricultural 'society will lie held this year at Hyracuse, c ir ing the week beginning Aug. 31. The Connecticut Sheep Breeders' as sociation will pay flO for every g caught killing sheep, or for every ) 2 against whi h mutton murder can Re proved. There never was a letter time to ob tain seed of new and improved varkiies at a low price. Probably fewer bogus fertilizers are sold in Conneetienit than in any other state. This is due to the experiment station. The Crosby is certainly worthy the attention of all who seek to grow the peach in cold climates. The Vermont Sugar Workers' as sociation is credited with having done much during the last two years to establish the maple sugar trade in that state on a very firm footing. Don't Scatter- We often heargeiexl old ladies advise their friends when they are afflicted with loiU and other swellings of a similar character that indie-ate a bad condition of the bloenl, to "take some thiu' to scatter "em." This is the worst advice that could be given, for, if somet thing "se-attering" is taken, the poisem in the bloewl, which the system is try ing to throw oil through the boil or whatever the swelling may be, is driven back into the system, and soeflee-tually "scattered" through it; and by anel by it is likely to manifest itself in terrible ways. What should always be doue when boils, pimples, and other erup tions of a like nature apjiear, is to give something that will act on and with the blenul, and help it to relieve itself of the impurities in it; something in short, to assist the system in its effort to throw otr impure matter which dK"S not belong there. If swellings and eniptiems increase after lxginning to take such a medicine, lie sure that it is deiing exae-tly what it ought to. It is driving out the Kiison. When the bloesl is purilieil the-se outward In-die-ations of inward impurity will evase. The medicine that doe-s this work mt effectively is Dr. Pierce's Golden Medical Discovery. Chestnut Culture. Chestnut culture is receiving inciva ed attention. The jossibilitie-s of grafting improved varieties of chest nuts on seedling natives should be emphasi.ed. It is U tter to graft the straight seedling chestnut than a sprout from an eId stump. The trees grow faster anel better, and a larger pro r tion of the grafts thrive. This may be done when the buds are swelling, wMle some prefer waiting until the lei.es are eiut, says The New England JIomc stcwl. Spring Time Is when ne'arly everyone feels the noed of some Mood purifying, strength in vigorating anel health producing medicine. The real merit of Hood's Sarsaparilla is the reason of Its wide spread popularity. Its unequalled success is its best recommendation. The whole system is suse-ptible to the most good from a mcdie-inelike Ilooel's Sarsaparilla taken at this time, and we would lay sjK-e-ial stress ujion the time and remedy, for history has it recorde-d that delays are elangerous. The re markable success achieved by Hood's Sarsaparilla anel the many words of praise it has receivcel, make it worthy ef yeiur confidence. We ask you to give this medicine a fair trial. The Baling Passion. A famous English lawyer once made the assertion in the presence of several ladies that no woman ever wrote a let ter without a pnstse-ript A certain IjiAy G. who was present resented the lawyer's statement anel added: "My next letter to you shall refute you." A wee-k or two later the lawyer re-e-eive-d the le-tte-r, and a most entertain ing one it was; but after the signature Lady G. wrote: "P. S. Who is right now, you or I?" TirfKt. Electric Bitters. Electric Bitters is a medicine suited for any season, but perhaps more generally needed, when the languid cxhausteel feeling prevails, when the liver is torpid ami sluggish and the ne-ed of a tonic ami alterative is felt. A prompt use eif this medicine has eiften averted long and pe'rhais fatal bilious fevers. No medicine will act more surely in counteracting and fre-cing tho system from the malarial poison. Headache-, Indigestion, Constipation, Dizziness yu Id to Electric Bitters. .lOc. and fl.OO per bottle at J. X. Snyder's drug tore Somerset, Pa., eir at Brall ier's drug store, Berlin, I'a. He Liked the Idea. After he had lieen through all he departments of the penitentiary ihe visitor called the warden to one sid "Suy," he said in a whisper, -do you suppose I could arrange tobeshav ed here ?" "Shaved f "Yef. I'd like to make a permanent arrangement. I like yeur methods, you know." "Why, they are much the same as " ' "Oh, not at all. You elon't permit your barbers to talk." VliL-ay.i Even ing 1'uttL t Marvelous Results. From a letter written by Rev. J. Gunderman, of Pimondalc, Mich., we are permitted to make this extract: "I have no hesitation in recommending Dr. King's Ne-w Discovery, as the results were almost marveleius in the case of my M i fe. While I was pastor of the Baptist Church at Rives Junction she was brought down with Pneumonia succeeding La Grippe. Terrible paroxysms of coughing would last hours with little interruption and it seeiut'J as if she could not survive them. A friend reeommende'd Dr. King's Xew Discemery; it was cf.iiek in its work and highly satisfue'tory in results." Trial bottles free nt J. N. Snyder's drug store, Somerse-t, Pa., or at Brallier's drug store, B.Tlhi, Pa. R-'-irtiiar size SOej. and fl.oX). Half a bushel of p'ltat.ies a d y for a milk cow is the limit recommend ed by Professor Fjord. Mure than that injuriously ufllvU the milk, be Bays. BittttttttttttttttttttttttttttTtttttt Hosts of people co to work in the wrong way to cure a t St. Jacobs Oil 7$?ZrVZ 27. An Absent-Minded Man- There have been a great many stories about alise'nt-mindeel men, where one forgets his house addre"sf, another what business he is in, and whe re an other hs to refer to the mark on his handkerchief be-feire lie can remember his own name, etc. There is a lawye-r in Fort Atkinsem, Wis., by the name of Rogers, who possessed a Jersey cow, which he useel to drive, morning and eveniug, to and from the pasture, a few blocks distant from his home. One morning as one of his neighbors was passing along the stren-t he met Mr. Itogers walking in the middle of the road, his mind apparently engrossed with some weighty question. . The neighbor called out: "Good nieiruing, Mr. Rogers; where are yeu going?" "Why," said Mr. Rigors, in a sur prised way, "I'm driving the cow to aslure," and he waved his hand to ward where the cow ought to have been. "Well, where is the cow?" asked the friend. ' H Juess I forgot to le-t her out of the barn," answered Mr. Rogers, humbly, as he realized bis position. Ami he had. During the winter of ISifl, F. M. Martin, eif Ixing I leach, Wet Va., contrae-ted a se-ere exild whie-h left him with a ough. In speaking of hew he cu reel it . he bays: "I used several kinds of cough syrup-but found no re lief until I lieiught a bottle of Cham berlain's Cough Remedy, whie-h re lieved me almost instantly, and iu a short time brought alsiut a comple-te cure."" When troubled with a cough or cold use this remedy and you will not find it ne-e-cssary to try several kinds before you ge-t relief. It has been iu the market for over twenty years and constantly grown in favor and popularity. For sale at i and oO cents iier bottle by Benford's Phar macy. No Apology Needed. In addition to giving the convicted man a term of ten years in prison the judge imposed upon him the gratuitous punishment of listening to a long speech made for the benefit of the re peirters, in whie-h he se-t forth specifical ly the reasons for his action. "You nee-dn't of elone all that axh gizin', fer imposing on a feller," said the culprit kindly. "They ain't no hard feelings on my part. I know as well as you elo that a man can't hold a job of judge and act the gentleman at the same time." inliiHnjftlinJoumn. It will le an agreeable surprise to jie-rsons subject to attacks of bilious colic to learn that prompt relief may be hael by taking Chamberlain's Co'.ic, Cholera and Diarrhoea Iiemedy. Iu many instances the attack may lie prevented by taking this remedy as soon as the first yaptenis eif the dis ease apjH-ar. anel .V) rent bottle-s.for sale by Beuforel's Pharmacy. TheTateat Collar. The latest collar to be worn with wo men's shirt-waists is eif stiff.' white linen, made like a clergyman's collar. This straight high band of linen, fastening in the liack, is much more be coming to most women than the c n veiitioual ceillar that ope-tis in the front It is promised for this new collar that they will not wilt liefore summer's heat, but will retain their pristine freshness and stiffness eveu when old Seil does his very worst. An Affidavit. . This is to certify that on May 11th, I walked to Melick's drug store on a pair of crutches and bought a bottle of Chamberlain's Pain Balm for in flammatory rheumatism which hael crippleel me up. After using three lieittles I am completely cured. I can cheerfully recommend it. Charles II. Wetzel, Sunbury, Pa. , Sworn and sulise-rihed to before me on August 10, IS!). Walter Shipman, J. P. For sale at 50 cents per bottle by Benford's Pharmacy, A Mixture for Bee Stints. It is well knewn that liifiid ammonia relieves the effects of the stings of liees. A correspondeMit informs us that a much more effectual antidote is the mixture known as aniuioniate-tl tinct ure of quinine'. On several occasions, when stung by lice-s, he found that the ipuiniue mixture would give much ejuieker and greater relief than am monia alone. Xatnrc. Wom?n Pastors. Ac-oriiiii2 to tho last nnnnal report of the t'onurgational Ass.ieiatioii of New York the'ro are five women who arc pas tors e.f small Congrf-gutiona! Churches in tlmt State. Theso women are all in middle lid:, have iieren married, mid have had children. With one exception, they are wives cf ministers. The beneficent inlluences of the new ly cut pine arc-condensed and rflned iu Dr. Wood's Norway Pine Synp, nature's own remedy for eemgbs at4 ttolds. "No wonder I'm tuck," said the bewileturcd pedestrian ; "I've run agalust the forks of the rooel." The Eye, Ear, Nose and Throat Are delicate organs, and a mistake or short delay often ruins your chance. Experience in their treatment is more trustworthy than theory. Consult Dr. Sadler, 804 Penn avenue, Pittsburg, Pa., whom you all know or have heard of, at the same office for 21 years, and who has treated more than 21,000 cases of every kind and degree with better re-sults than any man in Pittsburg. After examination he tells you the truth in all its1 bearings so you know ' what is best to do. His charges are j meieierate ana lie makes special terms with those unable to nu-et the usual expense. A jtcrmtnal examination is necessary iu evert case for reliable advie-e. The worst case of crexiked eyes can be straightened. When' all others fail, he succeeds in ailjusting glasses that give satisfaction. Mr. W. R. Depp, Punxutawney, had paralysis of one eye, aud crossed, or two years. The doctor perfectly cured him by eperatiem. Mrs. John Dowd, Charleroi, Pa. severe pain in car heard watch '.n pressure now well anel hears watch 10 inches. Mr.. H. D. Darter, Fee, Pa. from grippe and measles could only he-ar watch on touch with rur ings. Now hears it 3 to !) inches. S5 Parson Bletomfie-M I'm afraid, my friend, your heart isn't right. Dying Sinner Well parsen, you'll have to settle that with tiie doe-tor. He says it's my liver. T:xa Sifting. Extracts from woman's club proceed Ings : "Many a man who goes to bed I with iiwoninia becomes ae-ata!eptie the minute the baby begins to cry." Chirr. igo Record. A charitable old country dame, shocked nt the ragged aMjiect of a way farer, kindly offered to mend hi clot he for him. Thankee, mum," re-plied the tramp ; "I've got a button here, if youM kind ly sew a shirt on to it." Atlnnt't Jour nal. Freshly (seating himself beside a pre tty girl in ear) If you have no ols jectious, I will raise the window : I do love the fresh air. She Can't say I love yeiur fresh air. Leave the window as it is. San Fran ciitro Cull. Bucklen'i Arnica Salre. The Best Salve in the world for Cuts, Bruises, Sores, LTle;ers, Salt Rheum, Fever Sores, Tetter, Chapjie-d Hands, Chilblains, Corns, and ail Skin Erup tieuis, and positively cures Pile-s, or no pay required. It is guaranteed to give perfect satisfaction eir meiiiey refundeel. Prlee 2o cents per box. For sale at J. N. Snyder's elrug store, Somerset, Pa., or at Brallie-r's drug stere Berlin, Pa. A Maryland judge has ele-e-ide-d that after a young man has called on a young lady twenty-five times, the pre sumptiein that, he means busim ss has been established. Aim1 York Prr. . A freight car on the Baltimore A Ohio, at Sniithfield, was broken open and rob bed of ?1U0 worth of goods Sunday night. A lot of fine Bibles were among the goods opened, but the thieves had no use for them. ' mm k NEW FM The 0NLY PERFECT .FAMILY USE. For Sale By J. B. HOLDERBAUM, Somerset Pa. pENN SYLVAN I A RAI LROAD. rSTCRM STANDARD TIME. IN EFFEGT MficY 20, 1895. COXDB.VSiED SCHEDULE. Trains arrive nt depart from the stutlon a Johnstown an follows: WESTWARD WsHtem Vtprwi Mouthwmteni Kxprew Johnstown Acoomiiioltton... Accommodation Purlflc Expmui Way P-AMswngr 4:'H . ni. !S:iH - .-:,7 . tftll " fcM S:! " .... 5:1 " HW p. in. :M " Kmit IJn Johnstown AecumtiuxLitloQ EASTWARD. Atlantic Expres MM a. m. Ni-lMirr hxprtftM . : 411 AlUionu Ari-uiii!iuMiutio!i..... lhiy Kxpm-s " Muin IJnr Kxpn-si ..lir! " Aliootni A'-niU'imxiiitiun li'S! p. in. M;:i KxprtSH 411 Johnstown Acrouir.KKhttioti. - PhiluilHphiu Kpivss... 7:! " Fl Uu? . lOiS) ' For rate. mp, Ai, -:!! on Tirket Aip-ntjaor srtiliw Tlx. K. Watt, f. A. W. 110 Fifth Avenue, 1'lttnl.unt, 1'a. B. M. I'revost, J. R. Wood, . ei..-u. Manauer. tin'l Pasii At YOUR EYE! Wewant to catch It! EVEUY FARMER in Somerset Ctmnty who has a cord ef Hemlock Bark era Hide t dispose of will find that the t'OX FLUENCE TAXXEHV t o., will pay the highest cash prices for the same. Write for quotations to WIXSLOW S. COBB A CO., Ceinfluence, Pa. CONDENSED TIME TABUS. Baltimore and Ohio Railroad. Somerset and Cambria B:aa HOBT11VAB.D. Johnstown Mull Expn-ss.-Rorkwood S rt mMiiiTHet styniown 4i. II.k ersville 6.-eK JohutiUiw d 0:10. Johnstown Mail Express. Rnrkwoo,1 1(V'0 a nieri-l 11:1.. MoyeMown li:L iioov emvllle 11:, Johnstown lito p. iu. Johnstown Aoe-ommklnlion. Rnrkwoitd S3 p. m., Homrrsrt :J) St.. vr town li Hi. lioov ernville (fcoft, Johnstown 71. Dully. SOUTH WAKD. Mll .Tohnstown :Sn. m., ftv-ervvt!i 7 p S!o3 etwii7:i-,Hotii.t T:o5, K.-kwooii Ex press. -Johnrtown 1:V) p. ni., Hvemvllte :ll. Ht..rNtowu 3.ii, hoiupuet iii, Km-li-woou 4iJi Sunday Only Johnhtown &30, Soinorsot 10 UovkwexHl ltUu. is 0 THE sUs None Too Cood When You Bu--i-MEDICINES.- y It Is Jiist as Important to St-ur? FRESH, PURE DRUGS, A.a u is to , nave lunjuience AT SNYDER'S You are always sure of getting the fretshest medicines PKK.- Carefully CompeiundeeL TRUSSES FITTED All of the Beat ami Moat Approved True Kept in Stk Satisfaction Guaranteed. OPTICAL GOODS. GLASSES FITTED TO SUIT THE EYES CALL AND HAVE YClR SIGHT TESTED. JOHN N. Somerset, Louthers Main Street, This Model Drug Store is Favorite with FBESH . AHD . PURE . DRUGS, Medicines, Dye Stuffs, Sponges, Trusea, Supporters, Toilet Articles, Perfumes, &c. THE DOCTOR GIVEN rUUU.HAL ATTENTION TO THE COH mrMH ., .,r Loiir's PresGripiioiisi Family Escoin 6RKAT CAKI BEIC TAKES TO CE 0LT rKF-II AMI PURE AkTlrl.K. SPECTACLES, EYE-GLASSES, And a Full Line cf Optical Good large assortment all can be suited. THE FIHEST BBfiHDS OF CIGAES Always on hand. It is always to mtendmg purchasers, whether they buy ' from U3 or elsewhere. J. NI. LOUTHER M. D. MAIN STREET Somerset Lumber Yard ELIAS C"CnS"KXN"GET.M, MA-te rAfTlKKK ASD PKALER A!H WHOLESALE AND RETAILER vf Lumber and Building Materials. Hard and Oak. Poplar, Meting. Picket 8, .lonll ir ltaluat. Yellow Plae.Flooriiitr, Sa!h. SUr Kails, Cherry, fehlngle, Ior, IlaluHten. Cboinnl, Lath, Hlilte Pine lSlind, Aewel l'o(s He. A genera llnrof all gnd"sof Lumbrr and BuililinKC;itrial anj K.inrs1':"' kTe is tock. Also, can furninh anything in the line of our buin- tonriiT '.;h r-. - : -bie prom ptne, such as Brackets, oid-slzeJ wurk.'i :c. Eli as Cunningham, Office anJ Tard Opposite S. k C. R. THE NAME PRESIDENT of tie WILL BE The If YORK WEEKLY TB1BHB OF NOVEMBER 4, 1896. Public intvrvt will stenulilv inm-:ve. whose' vote's turnvel the se-ale- at tiie last nil iustr.it ion tliey clef teil, will make in ine History oi me country. The New York the leailing noptihliean f.iinily newspaper of the United state's, ill pu! peilitie-al news of the day, interestint; to every Amerii-.iii e-itiz-n res ir afliliations. Also B-neral news in attraetive firm, foreign eorrespoiuleiiep civerii ! the werll, an agrieiihnral elepartnicnt second to none i!i the nuti!ry. whie-h are reiiiied authority, faseiiiatin short tori's. tii:l-te iu t.t. he cream of tiie h-.mi.iroiLs papers, foreign and douu-sti.-. iili th-":r t-t ' ures, fasliion pluti's and ehtlmrnte ieseripti.iis ( woman's attire. a attntetie depart ineiit of household interest. The New York Weekly .' tdeal family paper, w ith a circulation larger than that of :i:;y t!ier w e k tion in the country issued from the oi!i. i- of' a daily. I.ir- eh in; ir in its details, tending to jivo it greater life and variety, and e-peeially in to the woine'ii and young peeple of tho household. A sn-X-IAL CONTILVCT cnubUs m The . Somerset . Herald ONE YEAR FOR ONLY 52.C0. CASH IN ADVANCE. SUBSCRIPriONS MAY begin at any time. AJdrcfs all orelcrs to -TIIK IIKliALD. Write yonr na i ail a Urm i ?tiltirJ, oal it t i'K W. K Trifcoiie CuilJinj, Xew Trk City, abJ sj.nple em of TUc V Weekly Tribnnf will be mailed tojou. IT WILL PAY YjOU TO BUY YOL'R Jlemorial Work or VVM. F. SHAFFER, HO ME IIS ET, PESSA. Manufacturer of and Dealer In Eastern Work Furnished on Short Notle- HIE! ill ESASITE Wl Also, Ajrnl for the WHITE BRONZE S Persons In nee.1 of Monum-nt Work wit find It to their Int. rest to rail at my shop whrrr a propter sliowini; will b iven t!i --.i. rttllsf:-tloii K''inoi:n-t in rvery eute uii 1 rrteoa very low. I Invite M eeml alU-u'ioa lo Iti Wi:t Sroire, Or Pjr IU9 Mt4nit ntf.U-f H -.-. W. A. n:-.i;. 1,-IK'l ni .n.v ti ..it Li l, pitic ,,. .f -,- 1! a! fieii.'iiie in!. ; ii is iei! 'ii , v f,.. P"l-n:!ir Moti-.iwiit f..r our eui..:. Cil- - " " BEST ine rnyslclan ff40 "tern. Thrm. 'I'.inio: SNYDER, Pa. Drug Store Somerset, Pa. Rajidly Ecccniin? aGrut People in Search cf alwajg on hand. From rA a pleasure to display cur SOMERSET. FA Soft "Woods, R. Utitrn, .MEEET. t OF THE NEXT UNITED STATES ANNOUNCED IN and tlie ilisurix'intnit iit i-.thf n-'' cleft ion. with the result in: r the ! the enimpuigu the nu-t intent' i xi-m: J Weekly Tribune, vs M he tie k.-t r- n:ii;e r7 .v. 4 !;'rr 'ni to offer fuU sple n.'i.d j..u;t.a! .vi-1 6 EliXCISZI) BY 223 P2iCTICALLTr& swu stiU,e j - : ' - mm M ... . If 1 f t' t ceauiiTui 11;- Designs. MONUMENTAL PSOMZECL- 9f A jf ir tshs 11
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers