M ILWAUKEET8 BAD BOY.
cal joi do, any hurt," asked th '
Iwi bov of the gjocery man, as ne
came in with his Sunday suit on,
and a boquet in his button hole, and
pried off a couple of figs from a new
box that had just been opened.
"No, sir" said the grocery man, as
he licked off the eyrup that dripped
from a quart measure, from which
he Jiad teen filling a jup. 'I hold
that. man who etts mad t a prac
tical joke, that is, one that does not :
injure lam, h a 1001, anu ne uugui
to be shunned by all decent people.
That's a nice boquet you have in
your coat What is it, pansies ? Let
me smell of it," and the grocery man
bent over in front of the boy to take
a whiff of the boquet As he did so
a stream ol water shot out of the
innocent-looking boquet and struck
him full in the face, and run down
over his shirt, and the grocery man
yelled murder and fell over a barrel
of ax helve3 and scythe snaths, and
then grouied around for a towel to
wire his face. .
-Vou condum skunk," said the
grocery man to the boy, r he toot
up an ax helve and started for him,
what kind of a golbasted squirt gun
you got there. I will maul you, by
thunder," and he rolled up his shirt
cleaves.
'There, keep your temper. I took
a test vote of you on practical jokes,
before the machine began to play
upon the conflagration that was ra
ging on your whiskey nose, and you
naid a man that would get mad at a
joke was a fool, and now I know it.
litre let me thow it to you. There
is a rubber ho?e runs from the bo
quet inside my pants pocket, and
there is a bulb of rubber that holds
about half a pint, and when a fellow
emells of the poy, I squeeze the
bulb, and you see the result It's
fun, when you don't squirt it on a
person that gets mad."
The grocerv man said he would
lend the boy "half a pound of figs if
he would lend the boquet to him for
half an hour to play it on a customer,
and the boy fixed it on the grocery
man, and "turned the nozzle so it
would squirt right back into the
grocery man's lace. Trying it on
the firt to come in, he got it right in
his own face, and then the bulb in
his pants pocket got to leaking and
the rest of the water run down the
proo-rv man's trow?er'sand he gave
it up in delist, and handed it back
to the bov. "How was it that your
pa
hail to be carried home rrom the
Mf ::iu
ble in a hack the other night,
h. Ftood clo.-e to the stove so his
jants leg would dry. 4lle has not
got to dnnkins: again, has he?"
, noaid tile boy, as he filled
tat bulb with vinegar, to practice on
Li.- chum, "it was this boquet that
got pa int 3 the trouble. You see I
got pa to r-niell of it, and 1 ju?t filled
h-ui chuck full of water. He got
imJ aM.l t-ilied me all kinds of
Mine', and said I was no good on
arth. and I would fetch up in State's
irLjn. and he wanted it to wear to
the fuKia'iie. He said he would
have iii. re fun than you could shake
a j-tlck at and I asked him if he
would fatch up in State's prison, and
h- aid it was different with a man.
He said when a man played a joke
there was a certain dignity about it
that was lacking in a boy, so I lent
it to him, and we all went to the
sociable in the basement of the
church. I never seen pa. more kit
tenlv than he was last hight He
filled the bulb with ice water, and
tlie first one he got to smell his button-hole
boquet was an old maid
that thinks pa is a heathen, but she
likes to be made something of by
everybody that wears pants, and
when na sided up .o her and began
talking about what a great work the
Christian women of the land were
doing in educating the heathen, she
felt real rood, and then she notid
pa's posy in his button-hole and 6he
touched it and then she reached
over her beak to smell of it Pa
squeezed the bulb, and about half a
tea-cup full of water struck her right
in the nose, and some of it went into
ber strangle place, and, 0, my, didn't
she yelL The sisters gathered
around her, and they said her face
was all persperation. and the paint
began to coineolf, and they took her
in the kitchen, and she said Da hit
her with a dish of ice cream, and the
wimmen told the minister, and the
deacons, and thev went to pa for an
explanation, and pa told them that
it was not so, and the minister got in
terested and got near pa, and he let
the water go at him, and hit n:m oa
the eye, and then one of the deacons
pot a dose, and pa laughed, and then
the minister, who use to go to col
lege and be a hazer. and box, he got
mad and squared off and hit pa three
times right by the eye, and one of
the deacons he kicked pa, and he
ot mad and said he couid clean out
the whole shebang, and began to pull
off his coat when they bundled him
out doors, and ma got mad to see pa
abused, and ehe left the sociable, and
i had to stay and eat ice cream and
things for the whole family. Pa says
that settled that with him. He says
they haven't got any more Christian
charity iu that church than they
have got iu a tannery. His eyes
were just getting over being black
from the sparring lesson, and now
be lias to go through the oyster and
leefstoak turn again. He says it is
all owing to me."
"Well, what has all this got to do
with your putting up signs in front
of iny store, "Kotton Eggs" and
Frowy Butter a Speciatly," said the
grocery man, as he took the boy by
the ear nd pulled him around.
You have got an idea vou are!f,,ii nrr.iwVl n-iri..
wuart , and I don't want you tocomej jn all attitude indicating that she
around here any more. The next !1 A friM. irt Purina fmrn f ht tUnt.
time I catch you in here I shall call
the police aid have j'ou pulled.
5rs, . , . . , , stream Uickled to the floor from the
The bov pushed his car back on j death wound. Her husband lav
the fide ot his head where it llon2. 1 u,wn bis back at her feet, his vest
ed,took out a cigarette and lititj)rn onen Mnopin ti shin n,l
and after puffing smoke in thi face
of a grocery cat that was sleeping on
the cover to the sugar barrel, he
aid: If I was a provision pirate,
that never sold anything but what
was spoiled so it couldn't be sold in
a first claf store, who cheated in
weighing and measures, who bought
only wormy figs and decayed codfish,
who got his butter from a fat ren
dering establishment, his cider from
a vinegar factory, and hu sugar from
a. glucose factorv, I wuld cot insult
the f on of the first families. Why.
sir, I could go out on the corner, and
when I saw customers coming here
1 could wJl a story that would turn
their stomachs, and send them to
the grocery u ihe next corner. S up
ose I should tell them that the cat
leep in tlie dried appl barrel, that j ach, aged five and six years respect
the mice made nests in the prune ! ivelv. were found in the Th
box, and rats run riot through the
raisins, aud that you never wash
your hands only on Decoration Day
and Christmas, that you wipe your
nose on your shirt sleeves, and that
you have the itch, do you think
your business would be improved ?
Suppose I would tell th customers
that you buy sourkrout of a wooden-
Uhoe Tolaeker, who makes it by
ofcabbase that he gets by
swill, and you sell the'
topble pl d you
them that you putlozengers into the
v vuui iiiai
collection plate at cnurcn, ana
r.horrAd the minister forty cents a
pound for oleomargarine, you would
have to close up. Old man, I am
onto you, and now you apologize
for pulling my ear.
Tlie grocery man turned pale dur
ing the recital, and finally said the
bad boy was one of the best little
fellows in the town, and the boy
went out and hung up a sign in front,
"Girl W anted to Cook,"
From Our Itojiuiar Corresiioudcnt.
WASHINGTON U2TTKR.
Washington, April 5.
On Wednesday the President re
turning from his "usual evening drive,
stopped at a book store to look up
some reading matter with which to
beguile the tedium of his long South
ern journey. Before he could step
from his carriage to the door he was
observed, and in. a few minutes a
crowd gathered ana uiocKaueu wc
sidewalk to the extent of compell
ing passers-by to take the middle of
the street, and the services of a po
liceman were required to prevent
the crowd from invading the store.
Truly, greatness and distinguished
position are subjected to ordeals ter
ribly trying to a satiated appetite.
I do not wonder that the President
pants for a little obscurity, for the
depths of some vast wilderness, and
is betaking nimself to the dense
shade of the Florida orange groves,
And yet, if he is still an object ol
curious inspection in Washington
where Presidents have. always lived,
moved and had their being, what
may be expected to remain of him
on his return from his trip to the
far south, where the natives have no
imnoention of a real live President?
a ...
for him during the next lew weeks,
when even for some time past he
Las beensickening and turning livid
at the sound of the airs "Hail to the
Chief and "See the conquering Hero
Comes." iie left the city Thursday
morning at 11:50 o'clock, on a spe
cial train, accompanied by Secreta
ry Chandler, Mr. Mills, of New
York, and Private Secretary Phil
lips, and many kind wishes that his
journey iiugul oe pleasant, ana 111s
lishing good,
lietore his departure he named
the new Cabinet officer, Judge Wal
ter Q. Gresham, of Indiana. Ihe
appointment is extremely well re
ceived in Washington. Judge Gres
ham has the reputation of being a
man of decided force of character
and has been mentioned for posi
tions of the highest prominence for
years. Hi3 courage 011 the field dur
ing the war attracted the notice of
General Grant, and the warmest
personal friendship has existed be
tween the two men ever since. He
says hi3 appoiniuif-nt was entirely
unsolicited and unexpected py lum-
self. His political enemies accuse
him of intense partisanship, which
means that he is a strong lU publi
can. His home is in Indianapolis,
and he is said to be an insatiable
reader of books.
On Tuesday, the close of Mr. Mer
rick's cross-examination of ex-Senator
Dorsey, marked an epoch in the
star route trial. In spite of Mr.
Dorsey's evasions, convenient mem
ory, and partial blindness, Mr. Mer
rick succeeded in extracting from
him some important admissions for
the Government It is claimed by
the prosecution that Dorsey was the
instigator and organizer of the con
spiracy, and the cross examination
developed a good deal in support of
this tneory. It has been shown tnat
Dorsey furnished the money out of
his own pocket to start aud equip
the combination. The headquar
ters were in his own residence on I
street, and he personally watched
and directed the preparation of bids.
In carrving out the scheme he had
devised, he sent to postmasters
whose continuance in office largely
depended upon him, even if they
did not owe their original appoint
ment to him, certain bonds, in blank,
with the request that thev procure
sureties and certify to them, without
even knowing the character of the
bonds. In one case at least a post
master indignantly refused to com
promise his honor, even at the re
quest of a U. S. Senator who might
be able to put him out ol oihee.
Senator Jones, of Nevada, posi
tively denies that there is any found
ation for the rumor that he has had
a disagreement with President Ar
thur, or that he expressed himself
as having made his last visit to the
White House. He further savs his
relations with the President were
never kindlier or warmer than at the
present time.
The citizens of Washington were
shocked Wednesday morning on
learning of a ghastly crime that had
occurred me nigni ieiore in a quiei : 9 commanding. The scrub is a
neighborhood of Capitol Hill. A parasite, aud the farmer who doe3
drunken husband by the nameofjllot know better than to breed his
de Prouville, who had been separat- j niares to anything and everything
ed from his wife for seven or eight j because the "fee is low, had better
months, forced an entrance to her j abandon his calling and leave it to
house, shot her down, and placing 1 otner5 t0 follow. As with horses, so
ilk.- iu 4.w 11 ucau itru ai iiti
feet The lad v was well and favora
bly known by many persons here.
She possessed more than ordinary
personal attraction, and was an ac
complished linguist, being employed
as translator in the Agricultural De
partment The report of the trage
dy rapidly spread, and the house
was soon surrounded by a curious
thrnncr On thp flivr nf tlio tvt.
;eued death. Her fair face was be
spattered with
blood, and a small
over hjs
flowed.
face a rivulet of blood
Baltimore, April i.ln explo
sion of gas occurred this morning in
a eewer in the northeast section of
the city, which damaged the streets
aai sewer $S,000to $10,000. Houses
in tlie immediate neighborhood were
injured, several cf them having their,
walls cracked and broken bv the
j caused by a boy throwing a lighted
match into the manhole of the
oimuwiun. 1 lit ptnA-inn won
.ine explosion
sewer.
This afternoon while removing
some of the debris the bodies of C.
A. McCarthy and Andrew Hinten
were, playing in the 6treet at ih
explosion.
"Oh, dear!" exclaimed Mrs. Fen
dereon, when she read of the disaster
to the City of Brussels, u and I was
going to buy a new carpet in the
spring, and I suppose this will make
them awful high."
From oar Regular Correspondent.
PARIS LETTKIt.
Pakis, March 20.
The old established Ilara Fair,
which from time immemorial has
delighted the good bourgeois of Par
is during Passion Week, was held as
usual on the Boulevard Kichard Le
noir, between the Bastile and the
Boulevard Voltaire. It would re
quire a born and bred cliaraiiier .to
describe by their right names all the
delicacies, having cured pork for a
basis, which adorned the half mile
or so of little wooden sheds that
made up the famous Foise aux Jam
bons. Seeing that the fair has its
origin in the dues paid to the Bish-
op ana chapter 01 ioire wameus
Pans, on imported swine nesn, ana
that during the week a rigid fast is
imposed on all good Catholics, it is
difficult to imagine why this partic
ular date should have been chosen
for the sale of the least mnigrc of all
meats. The secret of this apparent
anomaly is lost in the back pages of
history. The present generation, es
pecially the inhabitants of the elev
enth arrondissement of Paris, accept
their ham fair w ith a good grace,
and under the shadow of the great '
sceptic whose name adorns the hand
some boulevard adjacent, rush to
buy the succulent porcine meat of
fered to them at what the venders
call the lowest prices ever seen or
heard of. "Buy. buy, buy," 13 the
motto of the ham fair, whether the
hams be from Whestphalia,the pork
tausages from Bologna, or dried
sucking pigs, which, for all one
knows, may have been extracted
from the pyramid of Cheops. Nor
is pork the sole meat dispensed in
every shape at the fair. Sausages
of horse flesh and donkey meat en
closed in shiny red skins, and smok
ed sections of mule were displayed
on handsome stalls, adorned with
medals and certificates of first prizes
won at many an agricultural show.
Charculcrie hijqwpluigique may have
its devotees; certain it is that the es
tablishments which are compelled
bv law to announce the nature of
their viands but are not obliged to
state exactly how gallant 6teeds and
sure footed donkeys came to be I
transformed into sausage meat, are
constantly surrounded by gaping
throngs always ready to taste if not
to purchase. At the northwestern
extremity of ham fair in the annual
mart for the disposal of every kind
of worn out, old fashioned, disused
articles, which can only be classifi
ed under the general appelation of
rubbish. What other name, indeed,
would apply to an exhibition where
rusty nails, horse shoes, and batter
ed in kettles predominate, and where
second hand wooden legs, tarnished
door knobs and Prussian helmets
with the spikes knocked off can be
purchased by the dozen? The deal
ers in these heterogeneous ware do
not, as a rule, "run to" stalls. Their
goods are spread out on the ground.
passers-by being urgently requested
to turn over the heaps of rubbish in
search of what they may happen to
require. Here ana mere a ncsety
table, covered with the cheapest of
cheap jewelry, proudly stands out
among the piles of worthless old
rubbish, but rusty iron in every con
ceivable shape, from six foot levers
to ten-pennv nails, holds its own,
while a dealer who can display a
worn out sword or an antiquatea
pistol without a lock puts on all the
airs 01 a high class bnc-a-brac mer
chant. The most curious feature of
the rubbish fair is the tenacity with
which the venders refuse to abate
their usually exhorbitant prices, but
the initiated affirm that prices come
down "wonderfully on the last day
when articles can be obtained at the
purchaser's price.
The Value of Good Stack.
It is not in the power of any class
to monopolize the privilege of breed
ing the best and it is the duty of
every farmer to take heed and learn
'a lesson from the experience of those
who make a specialty of breeding
for blood and merit Farmers ad
mire good stock as hmhly as any
class, but they are slow to avail
themselves of the advantages they
possess. A man who lately sold
high-priced colt was not a farmer,
He knew nothing of stock-raising
outside of horses, lie was not even
a judge of any breed of horses except
the one he was accustomed to, and
yet he disdained to raise a Ecrub
colt What he has done can be done
by every farmer, and while it is not
expected that so large a 6um will be
realized for a young colt as fco.UUU.
which he received, yet it is an easy
matter to raise one that will sell far
up in the hundreds. Are farmers
and stockraisera willing to be idle
and see novices outsell them, and
1 beat them at their favorite pursuit ?
jUut it is not the trotter alone that
brings the higher prices. A good
farm horse bred from first-class
draught material, and of known
! blood, has a marketable price which
, other stock. Inlenonty in
stock is the sign-post of bankruptcy,
and points unerringly to destruction,
for experience has proved that no
farmer has yet been a first-class prac
titioner on the farm who did not
keep a close watch on the method of
breeding Ins animals and keeping
them up to inflection.
Killings' Guide to Health.
Never run into debt, not if you
can find anything else to run into.
lis honest if yu kan. if yu kant
1 be honest, prav for help
Marry yung. and if yu make a hit
don't brag about it
Be kind to your mother-ia )aw,
and if necessary pay her board at
some good hotel.
Bathe thoroly once a week in soft
water and kasteej soap, and avoid
tite butes.
Exercise in open air, but don't
saw wood until vu are obliged
to,
LaH eyery time yu are tickled,
and laff once i a while enny bow.
Jat hash washing day and be
thankful if yu have to shut your eyes
to do it
Hold the baby half the time, a d
always start the fire in the morning
and put on the tea kettle.
Don't jaw back it only proves
that you are as big a phool as the
other phellaw.
Never borrow what you are able to
buy; alwuz have sum things you
ron't lend. '
Never git la a hurry ; yu jeap walk
a good deal further in a day than yu
can run.
Don't swear; it may convince yu
but it is sure not to convince any
others.
If yu have daughters, let onr
wife bring them up. If she has got
fVl I n Til ft n BArtOA Bha ron Knn t t 1 1
-. - vu j uui
theory.
Kloqoence Which Won so Old
Soldier' Suit.
A distinguished company of law
yers sat in the Supreme Court room
) recently talking . over old times.
Among them was Colonel Charles
S. Spencer. He was in hia usual
happy vein, and told a new story.
"JL was retained," he said, "by an
ex-eoldier of the war to sue for the
recovery of some $1,800, which he
had loaned to a friend. The late
Edmin James was counsel for the
defendant I went to work zealously
for my client, James cross examin
ed the plaintiff in hia usual forcible
way."
"You loaned him $1,800?" Mr.
James asked.
"I did sir."
"It was your own money?" Mr.
James continued.
"It was, Bir," my client respond
ed. "When did you lend him the
money?" was the next question
asked.
"In July, 1S66."
"Where did you get the money,
sir?"
"I earned it, sir."
"You earned it, eh? When did
you earn it?"
"During the war, 6ir," was the re
ply, still in a very humble tone.
"You earned it during the" war.
Pray, what wa3 your occupation
during the war ?" Mr. James asked.
"Fighting," the man replied mod
estly. "Oh, fighting," Mr. James said,
somewhat taken down, and instantly
changing his manner.
"I smiled triumphantly, and even
snickered a little. James was half
mad. Well, we went to the jury and
I, of course, had the last to say. I
sailed away up to glory. I spoke of
the war, of the lives and treasure it
cost us ; of the awful battles that de
cided the fate of the Union ; of the
self denial and bravery of our men
who left home, and wife, and chil
dren, and father and mother, and
everything that was dear to them,
and went lorth to fight for fireside
and freedom, and the salvation of
the nation. I pointed to the plaintiff
as he sat there, still with the same
air of humility, and even sadness. I
said that was the sort of a man who
had fought our battles and saved our
flag, and shed his life's blood that
we and our children might enjoy,
uncurtailed, tlie glorious blessings
of freedom wrenched from the hands
of despots by our sires. I worked
up that jury, and the plaintiff him
self drew forth an unpretentious
handkerchief and wiped away a
tear. I got a verdict for tlie full
amount, of course.
"As we were quitting the court
room James said: 'Spencer, your
war speech eained vou the verdict
If you hadn't discovered through my
cross examination that the man had
fousht in the war, vou would have
i...., kin
My friend," I replied, "if you had
only asked the man which side he
fought on, you might be going home
with a verdict My client was an
old rebel."
Kffect of Bangs 011 a Girl.
Bangs on a girl give her an unruly
look, like a cow with a board over
her face. You take the gentlest cow
in the world and put a board over
her face, and turn her out in a pas
ture and she trets the reputation of
being unruly, and you would swear
she would jump fences and raise
merry Hades, and you wouldn tgive
so much for her bv ten dollars, only
for beet It is so with the girt 11
she wears her hair high on her for-
head, or brushed back, or even had
frizzes, and has a good look, you will
bet your bottom dollar on her, and
feel that she is as good as gold, and
when she tells her young man that
she loves him. there is no discount
on it and no giggling back ; but take
the same eirL with her front hair
banged, and when she looks at you
you feel lust as though she woul
hook, and you can't trust her. She
has a fence jumping look that makes
a young man feel as though he
wouldn't feel safe unless she was
tied hand and foot so she couldn't
get out of the pasture. A girl with
bangs may try to be good and true,
but its awful hard work. When she
looks at herself in the glass and sees
the quarter of her forehead, she says
to herself:
"I am dangerous; they want to
look out for me."
She thinks she is all right, but she
is constantly doing that which a gir
who wears her hair brushed back
would not think of doing. The bang
girl may belong to the church, and
may try to put on a pious look while
the hymn is being read. Uut . she
will look out from behind those
bangs sidewise at some meek and
lowly young Christian who is trying
to get ids mind fixed on the hymn,
and he will get his mind fixed on
her, and it will break him all up,
and he won't know whether he is
singing "A charge to keep I have,"
or "She's a daisy." The bang girl
may place her bangs down on the
back of the pew ahead of her during
the morning prayer and try to be
good, but one eye will rise like the
morning sun over the back of the
pew, and that eye will catch the eye
of a young mau. two seats to the
right, who is trying to cover his face
with one hand while he tries to keep
the dies off the pomade on his hair
with the other, and his interest in
the prayer is knocked into a cocked
hat The banging of a girl's hair
changes the whole nature of the lit
tle wretch, and she becomes as a gun
that is loaded. You take a picture
of "Eyanline" and bang her hair and
site would look as though she would
"run at" people.
An Rathuriiastfc Endorsement.
Goeham, N. II., July 14. 79.
IJknts V hoever you are, I don't
know, but I tban tlie Jxrd and feel
grateful to you to fcnoy that in this
world of adulterate medicines thera
is one compound that proyjes and
does all it advertises to do, ana
more. F our years ago I had a hi ight
shock of palsy, h;ch unnerved me
to such an extent that the least ex
citement would make roe shake like
the ague. ; Last May I was induced
to try Hop Bitters. I' used one bot
tle, but did npt see any change; an
Okhe? ,dd so change my nerves that
they axe nop leajiy as ,thev ever
were. It .used lo ifs bpth liands
to write, but now my good right
hand writes this. Now, if you con
tinue to manufacture as honest and
good an article as you do, yon will
accumulate an honest fortune,, and
confer the greatest blessing on your
fellow men that was ever conferred
on mankind.
TIM BURCII.
-,.You 8milawjieajrQU see a child
tryics CfTS ita owb ihadpwf but
how -many have been grasping ihad
owa all their lives, and. atifl con-
j unue .10 reacpt out ana ; grasp as
long ag bruta itd eyeaigbt last. ;.
' if - m -
The
How Butter May be Spoiled.
Good butter may be spoilt in
churning. Over churning ruins the
texture and changes the proper wax
ines.s to a disagreeable, sickly greasi
ness. This is the more easily done
in a churn with dashers, which will J
press the butter against the sides of
the churn and squeeze and rub it
until it is spoiled. Too long churn
ing spoils the quality by the oxida
tion of the butter and the premature
formation of strong-flavored acids in
it, the full presence of which we call
rancidity. It may "be spoilt by too
high a temperature, by which it is
made soft and oily, and of greasy
texture and flavor. No subsequent
treatment can remedy this error.
It may be spoilt before the cream
reaches the churn by keeping it too
long, or what is practically the same,
by keeping it in too warm a place ;
50 degrees ia about the right tem
perature if the cream is kepta week;
if it is kept at.G2 degrees, three days
is long enough. White specks are
produced in butter by over churning
it or by having the cream too sour,
either of these faults produce curd in
the milk, and the small flakes of
this cannot be washed out of the
butter. Milk from a cow in ill
health, and that is acid when drawn,
will produce specky butter. So will
the use of sali containing specks of
lme, which unite with the butter
and form insoluble lime soap. White
specks are covered up to a large ex
tent by using good coloring, which
is made of oil as the solvent lut
this use of coloring being used to
disguise a fault, and to add an "un
deserved virtue, is most worthy of
denunciation.
The Bad and Worthless
Are never imitated or counterfeited.
This is especially true of a family
medicine, and it is positive proof
that the remedy imitated is of the
lighest value. As .soon as it had
been tested and proved by the whole
world that Hop Bitters was the pur
est, best and most valuable family
medicine on earth, many imitations
sprung up and began to steal the
notices in which the press and peo
ple of the country had expressed
the merits of H. B., and in every
way trying to induce suffering inva-
lds to use their stuff instead, ex
pecting to make money on the credit
and good name of II. B. Many
others started nostrums put up iu
similar style toH. B., with variously
evised names in which the word
Hop" or "Hops", were used in a
way to induce people to believe they
were the same as Hop Bitters. All
such pretended remedies or cures,
no matter what their style or name
is, and especially those with the-
word "Hop" or '"Hops" in their name
or 1:1 any way connected with them
or their name, are imitations or
counterfeits. Beware of tbem.
Touch none of them. Use nothing
but genuine Hop Bitters, with a
bunch or cloister of green Hops on
the white label. Trust nothing else.
Druggists and dealers are warned
against deaung in imitations or
counterfeits.
A Cincinnati woman knocked her
husband senseless ' with a copy of
the Bible. The word of God is pow
erful. MACKEKEL
AT Oflt
HOl'SE.
HOARDING
Few people who eat salt mackerel
stop to think of the adventurous life
led by the men engaged in catching
the creatures, these men are sub
ject to hard knocks and every kind
of exposure. 1 he celebrated fishery
house of Jas. u. larr & tsro., Glou
cester, Mass., say : ''We have had on
board our vessels frequent cases of
cuts, bruises, sprains, and summer
complaints. Our captains Bay they
wouldn't go to sea without Perry
Davis's Pais Killer.
A man stopping his paper wrote
' I think folks otten to spend their
munny for paper9, mi dadda dident
and everybody sed he was he was
the mtelligentest man in to county
and had the smartest family of boiz
that ever was."
An Old Man's Belief.
Have used Parker's Ginger Tonic
for my bad cough and hemorrhage
I had twenty-five years. I feel like
another man since I used it Am
CG years past Believe it sure to
cure younger persons. A. Orner,
Higbspire, Pa.
A Crpenter's Fall.
Lancastkr, April 3. About 12
o'clock to-day, Charles Rush, car
penter at the poor house, while mak
ing arrangements to move to Lan
caster wis instantly killed, lie had
placed a stove, which was on the
second story of the almshouse, on
the elevator to lower it to the firs
lloor, when the rops of the elevatot
broke and Mr. Hush falling with it tr
the first floor was instantly killed.
Hope fur Drunkards.
My husband had drunken habits
he could notovereome until Parker's
Ginger Tonic took away his thirst
for stimulants, restored his energy
of mind and gave him strength to
atteud to business. Cincinnati lady.
Little Arthur bad been to church.
" How did you like the sermon ?"
asked his sister. Pretty well,"
responded the youthful critic "The
beginning was very good, and so was
the end. but it had most too much
middle."
For dressing the hair, and beau
tifying it when gray, nothing is so
satisfactory as Parker's Hair Bal
sam. Aunt Esther was trying to per
suade little Eddie to retire at sunset,
using as an argument that the little
chickens went to roost at that time.
"Ves," said Eddie ; "but then,
Aunty, the old 'hen always goes with
tbem." ' ' ' " ' '
THEGRlmiAN
REMEDY.
FOR PAIN.
Baihnre and cures
BHEU3UT1SV,
' Neuralgia. "
Sciatica, Lbmiago,
pACftJiCUf,
IEAJUCH4,tWTiUCia,
SORE THROAT '
quinsy, swKixnroa,
aPBAIKS,
Soreneu. Cuts. Bnaata,
FROSTBITES, - ,
Bram, mium,
And all other bodily i
FIFTY CUTS 1 IQTTLL
told by an Drnnristaaad
Ilralm. IMreeUMW in II
taaeuagea.
Tat CtariM A. Vsajaiar Co.
tsssssswa w a. nuui cn
CLARK
Indian
Cures all diseases
.An
Bowels. Kidneys, Skin and Blood. . Uillions
testify to its efficacy in healing the above
named d iseases,and pronounce it to be the
W BEST BJCiMiiiDx HINUWJN TU JW.-a.lM.
Guaranteed
OgiTAGENTS
Laboratory, 77 West 3d street,
I TRADE Mm,
Dr. CUrk . I troabledwith Pilpiution ol in Heart, but sicca uiiinjr your Indiaa
Blood Hjrap 1 have received much relief.
ACCIDENTS
HAPPEN
EVERY DAY in the Year.
PERRY
DAVIS'S
PAIN
KILLER
. IS the
GREAT
REMEDY
FOR
1CKX3,
Crrs,
Bkuises,
SrRAHtS,
Scratches,
CoNTcsiosa;
Swellings,
Scalis,
Sorks,
Dislocations
Felons
Boils,
&c, &c.
DRUGGISTS KEEP IT
EVERYWHERE. J
DR. FAHRNETiS
THE wonderful cures effected by thi now well
known remedy, not only in our private practice
at home, but throughout the Lnited states, ftas
drawn the attention ol tne meaicai profession iu us
use thronihout the land. In Chronic Rheumatism
or Constipation, Milk I-ee, Scald Itesd, b.m l'i
eases. Ulcers and BoiU, Ki'lney and Urinary weak
ness. Female weaknesses ami letter attect'.cr.s.
A large proportion of the Chronic and OiiSTirtATi
Tiskass that afflict Maxkind have their ori-in n
an impure state ef the ltujoD and a depravel tond
tion ot tne liver, ana poisons mc vc.y
Life; end no better remedy can I used thr .
Health Restorer. A Sisclk Botti.i: v
nrrdiiresiirh a chanre of feelin? as often to AsT"N" '
the 9UFFEKKR. lie ADV1SS1I anu ktvc IK 11 wi.
A..
LHL'GGISTS AND TOBltiEErEKS sell It.
Pkej-aked Ey
DR, I. FAHRXEY & SOX.
HAGERSTOWX. MI).
so.
miTHr.npftFT
Incrcafw-s in poptilnritT
every dny, as ladies And It
tbo inont
COMFORTABLE
AUD
PERFECT FITTENCJ
corset CTir worn. Mer
chants sy it civw the lxst
satixfaetion of any corset
they ever old. Warranted
ratisfBrtorr or money re
funded, for sale by
PARKER & PARKER.
Beautiful Homes.
FrewoitiR, Kalaoinlniug, Pa
per Hanging.
MR. FRANK OAUL, who bag no superior in
tlie above styles of work, has lust returned Iruui
a protract ed tour through the east, where he
"cauicht on to" all the novelties in his line. He
is prepared to lumleta all styles of aper at priees
to suit. Some of bis samples of papar are sim
ply superb. Parties desiringr his services will
hnd him al the Somerset House.
MOST ETTENSIYE PURE-REED LIVE-STOCK
Cutabllahmeatla tne. World !
o V. o X
.'Ilila. Petrche-ron - trmsoi
Pugllali lrslt llnnra, I rwtituC-Hret
KiMidnlKrii, htirtlantf Ponies), Hulalrln
mm ! Cottlea.
Our customers bare the advantage of nr many
years' txytritnet In breeding and lmiHirunk'.'arae
colleetimi, opportunity of comparing diffrrent
arte, low pricn. because ot extent oj aaxlitftt
ami low raltt of tran?iorlatlon. Cataluaeucs free.
Correspondence solitited.
POvV FXI. BROTHERS.
Springboro, Crawfon. Co.. Fa.
MonUon Herald. t ianl7.
T EGAL NOTICE.
Tu Kebccca Slpe, widow. Michael H. Sipe, Alex
ander, now Qereased, leavlnteonecbiltl, Msrstie
. Sipe, Nancy, lutermarried with Josuiu Mm Her,
Snsan. Intermarried with Ellas Me vers, now
of Kails t'ity. A'el Sarah, intermarried with
Itavlil Momrr, Frank fijie. now of Hi.w.ttha,
kansts, Aicnes, intermarried with Ed.Korns,
Jenule, intermarried with Peter Sn-ieher, Kin
m. intermarried with Iranlt iibeiicb, Annie,
lutermarried with Oewrjre Schmurker, and d.
f. Sipe.
You are. hereby notified that In pursuance of a
writ of partliion Issued out of the Orphans' (Joun
vl tonurset county. Fa, I wilt bold an inquest
on :h real estate of Henry Sipe. deceased. In
Jenner township, at his lata residence, on Wed
nesday, the ltih day of April, lsi3, where you
can attend if you think proper.
JOHN J. SPANOLF.R,
Susntrr's Ornca' ( Sheriff.
March-a.l'dW. (
PHOSPHATE
For all Crops)
$25 Far Ton.
A TrieJ it Tatals Fertfe.
IT IS A SCTER-PnOSPHATE AXD
not Acidulated S. C. Kock.
It Contains no Dirt or Sand,
Its Analysis is Guaranteed,
It Contains the- Elements of
Plant Food,
It Gives Good Results.
Vfeq $ 2$ per ton of 2.000 lbs.
. On can or boat In Philadelphia.
- GflaraniEEi Asalyjis Printed onEielBas.
SEND FOR CIRCULAR. ADDRESS
BAXJGH & SONS,
SOLE MAN'UPACITREBS,
20 Crath Delaware Ave., Phila.
msi'jt.
A DMIXISTIUTOIi'S NOTICE.
Catal of CoaraJ Brant, late of FrothersvaUeT
Twp., Somerset Co., Pa., dec d.
Latum of administration oa tne above estate
having: been eras ted to the anderslicned, by
lb proper authority, notice la hereby given
to tboee Indebted to It to make immediate par
teem, and those bavins claims or demands will
please present them duly authenticated for set
tie meat en Saturday, May iu, 1SH3, at the lata
residence of deeeaaod.
HIRAM & BRANT,
r aprlU . Administrator..
HlSiTHESMEa
and Acute Gout, Jaundice, i;mou cisorucrs ami
Liver Complaint, Pimplej and Eruption on the fi. e,
Kryipela, lropical i'rontilcs. Painful and ditiict:!:
Menstruation. Nervous or Sick Headache, C " tivepcs
r'v"..jiiii-p.,
V'1.' r 'ml, -"f7
JOHNSON'
Blood Syrup
ol the Stomach, Liver,
to Cure ysncpsia.
WANTED.
New York City. Druggists sell it
Vnnvrowir. Pa.. Antrim 21t. 1MO.
J Jk.vi.jj.
THE
IvIGi
IT IS THE
Lightest RunnlngShuttleMachine
being almost noiseless. It has ;
Sslf-Threading Shuttle,
which tentton can be regulated '.without removing
from the race: an
Automatic Bobbin Winder
by which a bobbin ran be woun.l as even s a spool
ot silk wit aout the aid of the hand to guide the
thread, thus assuring an even tention;
A SELF-SETTOS HEEBLE !
A DOUBLE-STEEL PEED!
& lan;or ?pace under the arm than any other fam
iiy machine made, (loin if & larger vriHT anl
ureater r ad ire ot wnrti than any lit m iiy nmchtne.
Simplest construe ed, easieft managed, runat
thorough build and best machine In the world
Sold on the
HOST REASONABLE TERMS!
BY
Jenner
autcia ly
X lloads, Pa.
MARTIN SCHiEFER,
Book Bind cr,
Loccst Strat, Opiasits St. Juin's ScM.
Johnstown. " Pa.
ALL KINDS OP
Books Neatly Bound
AT LOWEST KATES.
Old Books !Re-33ound.
MUSIC BOOKS A SPECIALTY.
Hurtles de sir in if books bound can obtain prices
by dro;piDif me a card. Arrangements have heen
mde wiierwby express one wy will be paid on
all lare orders. Ail needed information can le
obtained at Somerset HttkUaLU otfu-e.
novla.
F. W. CLARK,
WHOLSEALE PRODUCE
AND
COMMISSION M ERCHANT,
Corner Main and Market Strasis,
JOHNSTOWN, PENN'A.
avrl9
LIME! LIME!
The Buffalo Valley Lime Company, limited,
will sell, until further ordered, onslacked lime at
the following rates:
At cents per bushel, loaded on ears at kilns;
at l'l cents per bushel fur any quantity leas than a
ear load; at 11 cents per buhel delivered at any
station on the Berlin Railroad; at 12 cents per
bushel delivered at Meyersdale and Kix'kwuod:
and at I2V4 cents per bushel delivered at all other
railroad stations in Somerset countr, includinx all
those on the Somerset i Cambria Railroad, i'aj
ment ean be made to the following persons:
John L Savior, at Frtetlens.
W. H. Koonts, at Somerset.
Harrison Snyder, at Koekwood.
Frank tn-n, at GarTett.
Samuel J. Miller, near Meyersdale.
We must depeDit upon lime as the basis to fer
tilize our IL (.h-der it now and have it ready
when needed. Order from Frank Knos, Uarrett.
nov:
ADMINISTRATOR S NOTIC E.
Estate of James Welicle. lato of Berlin borough,
' deceased.
Letters of administration on the aVive estate
bavin been granted to the umiersiimed, by the
proier authority, notice is hereby iciveu lotbone
indebted to it to make Immediate payment, and
those having claims or demands will present them
duly authenticated for settlement tu W. 1.
Woodcock. Altooua, Pa.
W. L. W(JDCX!K,
mar28 Administrator.
POTTTZ'S
HORSE AND CATTLE POWDERS
k
J-JUT2
y PonK
"! r,t t o- -. ror or xrn T"
tr - ''lit i.-r ; t-.- .. :n : :t r-.
.: i ! ..-: . v !'..-. ..... .,.,.l(., '(mrRll: w- .
1, 1 1 t,ji( 1, (.,
.:-!. . , t 'l ' r - tlo- inim'ii vo- 1
'' u I- ' ... a i uuko tUe blUcr t..j
, . t.
-MtV Wiw.i v " c-r. nr r.ror-ht eWft Even
..lit. u !.:. Mi 1 I :.M ., r h'l . t.
I r ir.K v u.'..trt aarikractius.
Kr.u.vvuf) w i-rn.
CAVIP - roevc. Proprietor.
B4I.TilioaE.jfD.
HOW WATCHES ARE MADE.
In a Solid Goi.i VVatcd, ssile from
the necessary thickness fur engraving and
polibliing, a large proportion of metal is
needed only to stiill-n and hold the engrav
ed portions in place, and upply strength.
The surplus gold Is & tually needless. In
Jame Boat Patent Cold Waieh Cue this
VA8TE is saved, and boliwty and
fcTBESoTH increased ly a simple process,'
at one-half the cost. - A plate of eouot
cold is soldered cn each hido of a plate
of hard nickel conipoaitiot) metal, and the
three are then passed between polished
steel rollers. From this the cases, back,
centers," betels, etc., are cnt and shaped by
"flies and formers. The gold is thick
twougu 10 aumn 01 an Kinds ot cnasing,
engraving and engine durning.( These
cases have been worn perfectly smooth by
rise withoot removing the gold. TKi is
the only cate made vwler litis process. Each
fate is accompanied Ttilh a valid guarantee
tinned by Ihe uumvfatiHrcrt warranting it to
war 20 yean. 1.50,000 of these Cases
now carried in the United States and
Canada. J Largest and Oldest Factory.
Established ISM. Ask, your Jeweler.
, fit,
GET THE BEST!
More Somerset Coun
ty people have read the
T1W ATT. fliinnrr iho
HERALD during the
past year than ever be
fore, since it was hrst
printed.
Because its news col-1
umns present all the
latest news in an at
tractive style.
Because it always
mf
irives all the local news
without burdening its
columns with unmean
ing and uninteresting
correspondence.
Because it is always
reliable politically, and
savs what it means and
means what it savs.
Because its Court re
ports arc always full,
fair and trustworthy.
Because it is the me
dium used by the peo
ple of the county when
they wish to let their
neighbors know when
they have a farm or
anything else for sale.
Because all legal ad
vertising appears in its
columns, and people are
thus kept posted as to
what transpires in the
management of the af-
I fairs of the Courts and
County.
Because it ha sthe
best Washington anil
Ilarrisbunr correspon
dents attainable.
Because it is active,
aggressive, and always
for the cause of its
constituents.
If you have friends
who live outside the
county, there is no
more acceptable pres
ent you can send them
than a copy of their
county paper.
If you have a neigh
bor who needs a paper
recommend the her
ald. It your children want
a paper, subscribe for
the HERALD.
Subscriptipn $2.Q0
jpCr yCOiT,
iddress
HEBALD;
Somerset, Pean'a.
M
t
HISTORY REPEAT
Pen's advent to this cot-
two hundred years ago rry.
regarded as that of a Clotf
We continue in the snmlr:
upon similar principles 0fV
ty ana prudence, but
largcd facilities and supc.
advantages to the custo
who has not only a lare
from which to select, but
privilege of returning
and getting back the n-c.
on all purchases that ci
otherwise be made satis!ac
t
I
t
A.O.YATES&Cfj.S
Ledger BCIII112, els::?! ci U
lhiladclphia.
Feb SS
lMXIIIEIlTi liJL
HAIR BALSAM
g ouot of il5
j :KarLiiii? and p - At.
It Ccntu;rj
to tlie scai : y-
and al way
Restores tht Youthful Cotof to Grey or fiitih
Parker't Hair Bakara is fineV jwrfunicrl n-. . '
varracted to prevent falling of the ii cr ar. .
move dandruff and :tchu- 5. Hiscox Ats.S ,
Tl -A T5 XT"?? 3 ft
r
1
GINGERTOIife
A Superlative ncaiTB ana srrettgn
If you are a mechanic or farmer, wm ,
orrrwrn-K. or a mmner run otrwn uy r.ni;.ycr r
hold dudes try PaaKak' Gixciia l'vsic. 1
It you are a lawyer, minttcr or h.M.-icw ra fj
luusU'd by mental strain or aiirrous e tes. , .
intoxicaingstimaUfits,butusePaikcr3Cir.r. .
If you have Coniuropsen, Iypep.i.i, i, ... ,
Ism, KidneyComp:n:nis, oranydivjiuvrofth. - Ia9
stomach, lwwels, blood or nctvcipAnn'sij aa
TosiC will cure you. jtislheCreal-: I ; i "
An 4 tea Bjit and Sarttt Cosofc Cure i vtr u
If you are wasting away from jj-. dktrr.".-. T.
any diiea or weakreas and reqimr a vitnu f
Gingss ToxX at once: it wii! invi .r-,t Jl;
yea up from the first dcr bnt will r.e r mi . '
it has saved hur.dies of liv c; it m..y b.t t - 0
CACTIOX r Ef-1 abilA.W. Pirk.r-i rr
enznpo4 of tfc. brt withal wewiU in lo,wr!J.in :
diS'Tvat trvm p.rpMUMMi. of cifpr j. S.ti.! i
liaccx a C... I. V. A 1 us in
Cr.AT SAVTNrt BtTiNG IOLL,K a.
V at.
lrsn'h aid hin; fr-crat'ce fu nn:: ; T
?-lihTf.d perfume eeedii )ilr pcruar. '
is arithias like it. Imtst as.on have; t; -; t
to CoLOOJtaardlook for signature ot .
nmtr V-tla. Aar '".'T' X o fc r- - -- -
T
RAILROAD SCHEDULES
SOMERSET & CAMBRIA RA
ilrca: ! r
3 U 'jfiijT a
On and after Jane l'A trains will run
SORTRWAKO.
aoirTOTMl k
C.
T
t ii'iii ii. riairt---'
;f 52 !J3 8Tnoi.a. V':-
l: : :
r. .
:15
ol
t:.M)
r. m.
12:. to
l:0ri
l.ii
1:34:
1 40
2:tWl
2:lv'l
2::u
T.M'
1:67!
:15j
A.M.I
4:00 ..aocarwooD...
6:la....alil.PtKD....
:3U i . . .SOU BBS nr. ..
i: ....8SI01CK ....
W ...ruiicoEss...
T:u! ..TTTOr3r..
Hoorctutviu.!
7:t BUTHKL....
7:oH' ....burdkk....
8:051 .. isoLBSim...
8:30 i . JOH 8T o s . .
A. M. T. 'H F
it m i M
ll.'Jd i.ii '
ll:u6 M :
lirM 5:12..
lO Ai! a:u..
1D:j! 4 ..
lu U! :'i..
t::! ..
: 4:01..
K .00 tii .
V.li Hi ..
The Mall, north and south, runs dailr: i
Local Train daily except uoday. :
On the Pittsburgh DiTtsh-o, B. a O. Kan -throuch
passenirer trains, east bound, will
Kuckwond at li-." a. m.. and 144 p. ur.'n:
respectively at Washington at 1 li a .. a
day. ami 8:41 next eTeninit. and at Kaltim.n.
s:45 a. m.. same day, and at 11:00 next evecru.
Westward-boand through trains lears bai-J :
at J0 a. m., and 7 p. m., and WashiDKtii'.i
a. m., and 8:10 p. m., arriving rejpecuteij w .
Koekwood at i:ufl a. m., and 3:w p. m.
BATIMORE 4 OHIO RAILROAD.
PITTSBURGH UITISIO.V.
On and after June 12, trains will run
' 1
KASTWARU.
STATU VS.
; -. .
r. . i a. M. ,a. a '
:10 8:iO:...PITTSBrKOH.... 3 '
11:10 li:00 CONNtLL-JVlLL.E.; 4:J "
U10: . VJ:a .. CON FL.V ENCE... I :S
12:lotj 1W CKSIN'A &
K2 l:17j..BKCHiK SIDING.. 3:al
VSrju tfc27t... PINKEKTUN.... J.-i: '
M:41 lli...OsEI.MAjr.. Wi'
Vi ta U.4 ....KiiWtX)l.... 3'JO i
1.00 12:i4 ...ilNEJBl)VE.....i:i,
l:u, 1:01 UAKHETT ! i:Wi
l:12i l:0f. YOUKK ; H.4:
l.iot .SALISBl KY ivnc. :
.-n. 1:14 L.MEYEKSIMLE...
1 l:lti....KEYSnXK J'
1:4 lrt....SANIl'ATJH... '
142' 1:34; BOVV.MAX .:1T
l:6o' l:t! PHILSUW...... tmK
1:6! l:4Ut!....aLEXt;E. j :'
07; I:Mtf! FAIKHOPK 1:40
tlj a 10 .... HYNDMAN i fAt
i:a0' 2:40,..UU.MBEKLANU..,W4
Mountain Express leaves Pittsburgh (S
dajs only) at 2 p. m. : leaves lnnellsI!, ;
'.nflupnoe, SSi..; Urslna. t:i0: Brooa S''3
i:38; Flnkert'OT, :; tasslia n. :: a'1!
wood, t m); Pine Un.ve. t:li : larrett. 1 : ' t
der,i; Salisbury Junril.m. eat MrT-r1!'
8:34. Letves Kkiool, 8:15; Mili'ord.s Jl:
lives at Somerset. 8.rtf.
Thronirh Mai! trainji dally.
Erpsess trains dailv nrii Sandit.
Accommodation trains and Fayette Exprw
Ticket offlcea. corner Fifth Avenue and
streets, and depot corner Grant and '
ruuourgn, r.
C. K. LRI. Gen. Passenger Air
I M. COLE, General Ticket As
WISE
eopla are always
limk.iit ft.r AhanM V
erease theirearniru.:
time beeome wealthr:
ho do not iiuon.ve their otiuortunlties rcav1
iniverty. We otter a grrat cbaac lomase
ey. V e want many men. women, dots sad r-1
to work for as right In tnelrewn loeatitte. A.
one ean do the work proerly from the hrst
The buitness will pay more than ten tMn"1;
nary wages. Expensira outtlt tarnished free. I
one who engages tail to make money rv--'r
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