T-'-'Ky V . jj ,??.'- -w ' Tt'ESDAY, J.WUAHY 4, 1803. THE SCRANTON TRIBUNE. TUESDAY, JANUAItY 4, 1898. T' jfWfe?"' Is r 1 A Thief by I knew that 1 was a somnambulist; but never, In my wildest Imaginings, did I conceive it posslblothnt 1 had a natural propensity to thieving. All the circumstances of my position, lis re Hponslhllltles, the exactions o caro nntl wlso forethought, everything In which i. 1 hod Interest as n nuin or integrity. 1 1. 08 a citizen and one upon whom high trusts nau neen conrerreu, roruaue a supposition so foreign to my nature, so antagonistic to my conceptions of mor al duty. The emoluments of my oltl clal business were ample; the confid ence of tho community, which 1 knew that 1 deserved by strict Integrity, was a sufficient guarantee of faithfulness, and th'.'Hj were supplemented by my fulth and hope as a Christian. A bachelor until the nee of thirty five, I knew not the gentle passion un til I mst Esther Venncr at an evening party. Her sweet face attracted mc as she swept past, leaning on the arm of her brother. I think 1 must have halt ed somewhat In the conversation which I was carrying on with' the hostess, who quietly remarked: "You seem attracted by the beautiful facj of the lady Mho Just walked past us." "I have seldom seen one so fair," T replied. "Indeed, until this moment T have never had a re elation of true fomalo loveliness. Every line of that face Is one of beauty, ahd tho expres sion of her eyes gives evidence of pur ity, thoughts gentle and tates refined." "Hey-day!" softly exclaimed my hos tess; "for a confirmed "bachelor you have wddenly become suspiciously po etical. 1 have long angled for you In the Interest of a protege, but have been nlmost driven out of my wits by the difficulties of the task, for you have always seemed heart-hardened and af flicted with a most unaccountable strabismus whenever 1 attempted to point out her charms to you. Alas! for my poor Gertie Oraham; In the I faca of the present lovelatlon 1 pre sume that I must .give you up." "But, madam, have I not always ex pressed admiration of her figure?" "Yes, O man of figures! I suppose In the enumeration of her personal adorn ments, you have brought the deductions of finance to your nld, somewhat In this manner: Item, one forehead, 1; two eyes, 3; one nose, 4: one mouth, '; two ears, 7; eight udded to nine, 17 about her age, I think.' And so liav ended your calculations. Now, It seems that faces as well as figures can be studied by you." "True, my dear mndam, I will for give the atrocity of your pun If you will introduce me to this beautiful stranger. But first tell me why I have never before seen her in society?" "The reason is very simple:' because this is her first appearance In s-nclety." "But where lias she hidden herself all these years? Eur, 1 think, she cumir't be less than twenty." "Nearer thirty, my it lend, but for the past twelve yfars s-he has lesldcd abroad." "Abroad; am! she returns unmar ried!" I exclalmod, for 1 did not con ceive it possible that one so lovely should not have been captured by u titled somebody tome rich nobody. "Yes, unmarried. In a. few words you shall bear her history. At the ago of seventeen Esther Vennttf" was sent to Berlin to complete her musical edu cation. With her want an old aunt to act as her protector. Two years af terward her father failed In business, and the family becume greatly re duced In circumstances. The blow was the more severe In that the aunt's for tune was swept away In the geneial Wreck. Preparations were then made for their return to America. But what was she to meet on her return? And could her musical acquirements be made available to help the family in their distressed condition? Still, there seemed no help for It. Something must be done, and that quickly, for Miss Venner is n girl of strong will and most determined character. Their trunks were packed, tickets were pur chased and preparations were made for departure the succeeding day, when one of the professors Informed her that if sho desired a position in Vienna he 'was commissioned to offer It to her that of music and English teacher to two of the young princesses of the reigning family. The salary would be ample, the professor said, and the du ties not arduous, for the princesses were known to be very amiable. Here seemed a solution of Ether's difficul ties., and it came nt a time when she was disposed to brave everything to help the sorrow-stricken ones at home. Would she accept it? Would she not? For he Is a true American woman, and all the world knows, or ought to know, what true American woman hood Is. Esther went to Vienna, and the aunt eturned to America. Years went by; she would not incur the ex P'nse of a return home, even for a visit, for she thought her family need ed all that she could send them. She was repeatedly offered marriage, but her answer was always the same who would marry none but an American, and only a man whom she could love. She always supposed that her remit tances were consumed In tho family expenditures; but they were not. Every dollar that she sent home was placed In bank to her account, until the total footed up several thousand dollars. A few months ago Mr. Venner, by advice of one of the Wall street financiers whom he had befriended when poor, purchased cortaln mining stocks which were selling at a low figure. Soon af terward a discovery was made of Im mense riches in the mine whereof Mr. Venner held stock In his daughter's name, and the price suddenly Jumped up to an enormous figure. Being u prudent man, and lutvlng been caught In one nip of fate, he did not wait for another, but at once sold out. Today Esther is a rich woman, and sho shares her riches with her parents, to whom she thinks they Justly belong. My statement has been a longer one than I Intended, and I trust It has not been uninteresting to you." "On the contrary madam, so highly have I been Interested that I again beg of you the honor of an Introduc tlon Ho Miss Venner." "Then come with me, O man. to your destiny." So saying, she conducted me to the sofa on which the beautiful lady was sitting, and I was duly presented. By a graceful movement, Miss Ven ner gave mo a seat by her side. The UBual compliments being exchanged, our conversation commenced. If I had been attracted by her face and form, how much more so was I by her vivac ity and her thorough knowledge Upon every point that we touched. Her manner was simplicity itself, grafted upon high refinement and truo woman ly feeling. We talked, until It seemed to me that to hold her attention longer would be rudeness to others who de- m,-. Accident. f sired to approach her. I left her side, and then I knew I was In love. I sought my amiable hostess, who greet ed me with that very cxprepslve word of interrogation: "Well'" "Mndam, It Is very well. I netfbr Was so charmed before." "And?" "Dear inadum, I shall win her It I can." "Aye, there's tho rub If." "Madam, 1 shall rub very hard, and I am convinced that 'if will disap pear." ."Are you so very sure?" '"You told me. dear lady, that Miss Vernier's ago Is near thirty." "I wlll.nmend my statement; she Is thirty-one." "And I am thlrty-ilv, nnd " "As I perceive, the mirror Informs you, that you are very good looking." "You take a lady's privilege, mad am, always the last word." "It belongs to me. Go and conduct Miss Venner to the conservatory. I give you permission to pluck the fnlr est white rose there. No reply; go." Beturnlng to Miss Venner nfter nil absence suitably long, I said: "Miss Venner, I have our hostess permission to conduct, you to the conservatory, and to 'pluck the fall est white rose there. Will you go? And will you se lect the rose for me'.'1' ' "The hostess must be obeyed, of the feast and all else will fall," she replied .as she took my arm. In my stupidity I expressed admira tion of a rose that was full blown. "No.", s-he said; "in choosing a rose take one Just between tho bud and the full blossom. It will unfold; and on cne of tho Inner petals, If the fairies have whispered to it, you will read your fortune. Take this." And she gave mo a bud whose outer leaves were half opened. ' Now. Miss Venner," said I, as I handed the bud back to her, -"I cannot read' fairy language. You dan, I am convinced: therefore, I beg you to keep the bud which will expand during the nlnht, read my fortune and permit me to (jail tomoriow and hear the transla tion." She could not refuse. I dreamed that night that the hud had expanded, till ing the whole room with Its fragrance. My dream was most wonderfully and singularly veilfled, for on awakening the next morning an odor as of a gar den in Cashmere greeted me. I found that I had arisen in the night and emp tied upon the carpet, bed and table every one of my perfume bottles, whereat my landlady, I have no doubt, greatly wondered, but she was accus tomed to my eccentricities. In one of the rooms adjoining mine, with an inner door opening and a thin partition between, there had been for s-evoral months a lodger whose musical proclivities sometimes annoyed me, es pecially as he was in the habit of hum ming an operatic air at most unseason able hours of day and night. So little of my time, however, was spent in my room that I had borne the aflllctlon with equanimity and tolerance, which, probably encouraged him In varying his musical performances to the extent of practicing on the suitor. This, too, 1 had borne patiently, until the night of my return t'lom tho party where I had met Miss Venner. I heard the twang twnng of his guitar as I entered my room. He secmeel to be practicing a new tune, one strain of which had evi dently struck ills fancy, for he dwelt upon it with a persistency that was positively exasperating. Filled ns was my soul with thoughts of the fair one whose soft accents had so thrilled me when she sang, or when she conversed In tones whose rndencta seemed mod ulated by the" varying phases of her theme, my equanimity wns seriously disturbed by the efforts of my neighbor to evoke harmonies with unskillful fin gers from strings not In tune. T en deavored, but In vain, to fix my thoughts and shape my pre-sleeplng dreams upon the fair being and the de lightful emotions which her remember ed beauty had called up. I simply could not 'endure such an Interruption of my high thoughts and fancy flights. Feigning a violent headache, I rapped upon his door und politely asked him to desist. He stopped his musical per formance directly and offered a suita ble apology, only once breaking the monotony of silence as he evidently prepared for-hls couch by a low whistle of th'a abominable strain. His whistle was worse than his guitar, but, as it endpd with the strain, I forgave It and retlivd to my own -ouch and to dream. The next evening I called at the resi dence of Miss Venner, which was in the same square as my lodging house. If beauty had thrlled me wlun Idles Ven ner mingled In tho throng at too recp tioi., how much more ple-i"'ip, wus the i harm when I saw her sv.iunded by those whom she loved, t!- father and mother, whose declinlg years she was beautifying by solicitous nttentlons.and the brother who evidently adored her. Ah! bachelor that I was: bachelor that I had po often declared I would re main; what wonder that a new soul seemed given me by a picture of home happiness so complete. Was I in love when I retired to dream of her? Now I was In the realm of enchantment. I gave myself up; I was more than a captive, for I longed to kiss and bless my chains. Wns I loved In return? That was the "rub" which my lively hostess of the previous evening had predicted. Was I pleasantly remembered? A .sin gle rose in a tall, slender Venetian flower glass attracted my attention. It wns full-blown, pure white and It ex haled a fragrance that seemed to In toxicate mo. I pointed toward It. "Did the fairy whisper to the bud?" I asked. "I cannot tell yet, for Its Inner petals sllll remain folded," she replied. "Will they always keep their secret?" "Perhaps. But we cannot penetrate the designs of the good people In whose caro are tho roses and all other flowera of special significance. "What Is tho secret In which the roso boars bo prominent a part?" asked Mr. Venner, while his wife remained dis creetly silent, having Intuitively read It in the conversation. "As the rose has not revealed It, we must wait patiently," Fald I, "and try to dj-serve tho revenlment." "Thenj" said he, "If we- must wait for tho jnse to speak, I confess that I have not tho1 time to spare tonight, for both Mrs. Venner und myself have an early engagement, and we must beg to be excused. William and Esther will but William has deserted us, I peroelve; so, u r.siner can atone entertain you, I trust eMMo so, with all the fairy and othiBaRhe gained In her Austiiai And hi I no dbubt my -words were free and my Bald I scarcely remember now; I have pleadings forcible, for I gave her little time to make replies, 1 presume that I painted my lono condition In lon gungo moving, and perhaps complain ing, for I detected a half sigh lovers' oars nro sharply sensitive and I saw a faint flush suffuse her cheek, and I begged her to bo my wife lovere" eyes nro quick nt detecting sufh nn evi dence of emotion. "We have known each other bo short a time," said she! falterlngly. ."Are you not premature in declaring your passions bo strongly? Can I so nuihlen ly yield to words which I confess are almost too persuasive?" "Miss Venner, I nm a man whoso character lias been formed by long ex perience In the world's nffnlrs., True, I first saw you hfst night first heard of you then; but hhd I known you for years Instead of hours, my fallh could havo no firmer foundation than now, my conviction not more deeply footed that you nro necessary to my happi ness. I nm almost a stronger now " "Not so," sho replied, with deepen ing color; "I knew you in Vienna." "But how could that be? I never visited Vienna." "Are, you sure?" "Quite so. I have never set foot upon foreign soil." "Wo sometimes travel by proxy," sho said, with an nlr so t.rch, a manner so earnest, yet seemingly playful, that I was lost for a tlmo In speechless amazement. "Listen," she continued, "I have a short story to tell you," nnd she ad justed her lamp shade so .that her face was partly In shadow. "You may have heard of my father's failure In business, widely necessitated my aunt's return to America, while I remained abroad." "Yes; I knew of It at the time It oc curred. Our hostess last night gave me further particulars, embracing your acceptance of the position of teacher to the two Austrian prln cessw." "But sho did not, for she could not, tell you all, which I will now do, If you will forgive my blushes." "We are generally supposed to for give that which we cannot see." That confounded lamp shade and I reached out my hand to remove, it. "No, no," she quickly exclaimed. "Let It remain, if you would hear my story." Very naturally I consented. 1 had a presentiment that a revcalment would be made In which my happiness was concerned. After my aunt returned to America we regularly corresponded. Her letters were somewhat mournful at first, but they encouraged mc to pursue the course I had chosen, although my fath er'" prospects were not so gloomy as I fancied they would be. Her communi cations became livelier, more chatty after a time, and so they continued for several years. Alvvnys Interesting, her letters became decidedly entertaining lifter slip commenced mentioning the name of a certain bank cashier whom she said she fixed upon as " "No. no; do not disturb the lamp shnde. I find I must teach you a les son In politeness which in your bache lor condition you have not quite mas tered; always to respect a lady's wishes when she begs you to spare her blush es." "Oo on, go on," I said In an ecstacy of dream. "You may be sure," she continued, "that my curiosity was piqued by her frequent nnd eulogistic mention of the man of figures, stocks, bonds and what notfe. And it was not allayed when, in one of her last letters, she sent me his photograph, which she had obtained by collusion with the nftist." "Have you that picture yet" May I see it?" "No eyes but mine have gazed upon It, since it was enclosed In my aunt's letter. Then how can I show it to you who declared that, until last night, you were a stranger to mo?" 1 was tantalized; consumed with thut strange curiosity which a lover always reveals In the presence of his mistress a lover who, already convinced, still demands a fuller convict ion a certain ty which seems impossible of attain ment. I was chained helpless. In my dilemma I turned to the rose. Esther for she gave me permission to use the name also came forward. "Look," I said;, "do you not see tho petals yet reveal what the fairy whls 'pered?" ' "Only In part, ' she replied. "And that Is" 'Llslen! It Is tho coinmencemnt of an oracle. " 'He who wooes should uevpr tire;. Constant fuel keens Hi. m " "What more?" I asked, as I raised her hand and was about to kiss It.when tho door was opened and Mr. and Mrs. Venner entered the parlor. Perceiving the state of affairs at once, Airs. Ven ner quietly retired, while her husband came forward and pressed my hand warmly. "My wife has told me all," he said. "Our Esther here but where Is she now? Gone to find that fairy, I presume. Well that Is very properly a lady's chase; but we men have other things to do, other matters to discuss. She Is very dear to us. We realize that she must some day be married, but we cannot bring ourselves to the point of sparing her Just yet. 'Let us keep her through the coming summer, for we have re cently regained her. In a few weeks wo shall go, as we have planned, to a mountain resort. Esther must go with us. If when wo return to our city home In the autumn, you come to us and claim her as a bride, your Jeslre shall be satisfied." What more could a father say? And what more could a lover expect. I did not see Esther again that night. A new and quite agreeable surprise awaited me at my room. A note slipped under- my door Informed me that my neighbor In tho adjoining room had de parted nnd sought a more retired quar ter where his guitar would disturb no. f body. To make sure I turned the key of tne ttoor nnu went in. Bag, baggage,, guitar, .whistle and all were gone. I sought my landlady, and at once hired that room for a supposititious friend who would some time come to occupy It. Meantime I engaged to pay the full rent. "Now," I said, as I locked the door and deposited the key In my trunk, "I shall not be disturbed, I can dream of Esther without unconsciously beating time to a twanging in which the only Idea of time seems to be an eternity of musical repetitions stale from lack of variety." I saw my beautiful love every even ing after that until tho family departed for their mountain retreat. Mr. Venner, while placing the key of his front door In my hand told me to look upon the house ob my future home, and after the return of the family. Meantime a housekeeper would enter every day by the back door to keep the rooms aired end properly cared for. Did I follow iny fiance to her moun tain home? Every Saturday afternoon and Sunday found mo there. Esther sometimes appeared solicitous about things which sho had left in her rooms, JONAS LONG'S SONS. A Gigantic Cloak Sale. We promise the most tremendous reductions, ever known in Scranton. Every garment offered in this sale has been made to our order within the last four weeks, representing the very Latest Styles and Best Materials. We anticipate, a great crowd, for bargains like these are few and far between. This Sale Today Only. Come Early While Assortment Is Best. 11 i r JSil We Guarantee Perfect Fit, If Alterations Be Required, We Will Make Them, Free of Charge. Your Money Back if Prices Are Not Found to Be Lowest. ' Furniture Dept. Match any of these bar gains in Scranton, if you can, at a third more than the prices given here : Oak Chiffonier Solid Oak, five drawers and hat box. Handsome finish, brass mounted, French bevel plate mirror on top. Never sold here or anywhere for less than $8.00. This sale $5.75 Rocking Solid oak or ma hogany finish.fan cv carved legs and Chairs back; worth $5.00, never sold here for less than $2.89. This sale $225 Hair 45-pound hair Hattresses mattresses, cov ered in Lenox ticking. Made to your order in one or two parts, as desired. This sale $5.90 Wire Springs Fine quality treble twisted woven wire springs in all sizes for wood or metal beds. This sale $L65 hut Sir. Venner assured her that the housekeeper was strictly honest; as the house was In my care, no fear need he entertained. Thus passed tho sum mer months. The family returned, and I welcomed them asaln to their home, In which wo all entered, Esther hanK Insf on my arm. As we entered "tho parlor I was startled by her exclama tion: "Why, where Is my harp? 1 certain ly left It here! And that picture of the Princess Hellene which 1 prized so highly! Where can that bo?" (oInp from place to place she dis covered thot( various things were trone things which had become dear to her from Ions association. In vain her mother tried to convince her that nil would he explained. She descended from her room pale and nervous from vexation and fear. "Father," she said, "tho house has been entered by burglars during our absence, for I miss various articles from my own room which I am certain I left there." lly this time I had become nearly distracted while witnessing her sorrow. Mr. Venner took tho matter more cool ly, seconding my proposition that tho matter be at once placed before the police and an Investigation made. I went quickly to the station nnd called for a detective, accompanying him back to tho house. A statement was made to him, the missing articles enu merated, and a thorough' search was made through .tlw houe. Nothing else had been abstracted; apparently only the room of Esther and the parlor had been burglarized, although many ar ticles of .eater value than those tak en had been left. Not a lock was broken; no attempt to get at silver ware had been made ; nothing had been removed except articles which were especially valuable to Esther. All as sembled In the parlor, tho opinion of the detective was asked, but his only reply was: "I must think this oyer for a day or two; I can form nn conclusion now. Where doen the woman who ncted as housekeeper live?" Mrs. Venner gave her address, hut JONAS LONG'S SONS. At $4.95 Fine Tailor-Made Jackets, high storm collars, nicely made, edged with fur and lined throughout. Some are medium lengths, others extra long. Garments that should be $6.80, 7.0 and 8.0. At $9.95 Beautiful Tailor-MflHp .hirkpte nf finpcr tnatoriolc 1nrawn. some half lined, others lined throughout the nobbiest Jackets ever brought to Scranton. Also Plush and Fine Cloth Capes, elegantly lined. Some plain, others fancy trimmed. Garments that would readily sell for $i2.yo, $13.85, 15.00 and 16.50. At $14.85 Extra Fine Kersey Jackets, with strap seams, high storm collars exquisitely lined in plain and fancy linings. " For style, fit and finish they have no equal in this market." In the same lot are handsome Imported Cloth Capes. These gar ments in Other Stores find readv riirr.hnspr; ;ir iR nn -onrS j $22.50,, $25.00 and $30.00. Great Bargains 50 pieces of 36-inch Rustleine Lining, in black, gray and brown, Value 8c yard. This sale at 250 pieces of best quality glove finished Lining Cambric, value 5 cents a yard. This sale at 75 pieces of fine quality White Nain sook, in checks and plaids, value 10c yard. This Sale at , 3 cases of full width English Percale, handsome designs and colorings, value 10c. This sale at '. 500 pieces of fine, heavy quality Ging hams, in a great variety of check and good colorings, worth 6c. This sale at 500 pieces of Fine Calicoes, in dark shades, worth from 6 to 10 cents, and Q sold for that in all stores. This sale at Jj Kitchen Crash. 100 pieces of 18-inch Twill Kitchen Crash, bleached and unbleached. This sale at Only ten yards to a. customer. Scranton's Great loudly protested against charging tho thefts upon her. The detective merely nodded, and went away without further wordsv I soon afterward left In a state of bewilderment and repaired to my room. After a few moments of silent cogitation I heard the faint cry of a cat, which was often repeated. An ex amination failed to reveal U19 pres ence of a cat In the hall, but the crlea continued, Every article In my room I removed, but still no such animal could I find there. Suddenly my at tention was attracted to the door that opened Into the vacant room, upon which I heard suspicious noises as of some scratching. Puzzled extremely, I unlocked and opened the dr ' when Estlier's favorite cat came oil., rub bing her gaunt sides against my legs. I entered the room, and there, neatly arranged In one corner, I found every thing that had been missed from tho burglarized house. Here was a climax at once astound ing and convincing. I I was tho burglar; Uhero could he no denying that. But why? How? Ah my un fortunate somnambulism! That that alone could account for It. In my sleep I had visited tho house and borne away, piece by piece, tho various ar ticles which my' beloved had so highly valued. What was to he done? They must bo restored, and at once. Hut how? Honor pointed out the only way, and I dispatched a note to Mr. Ven ner desiring him to call upon mo at onca.' He came. In a few hilef words I explained my terrlblo somnambulis tic habit, nnd opened the door to the other room, desiring him to enter. He utterod but one word: "Hello!" and burst Into a shout of laughter that must have been heard In tho street, for my landlady came up and demanded the cause of the uproar, "Nothing, madam," said Mr. Venner; "thLs gentleman had been telling me a funny story. That's all." Tho landlady looked puzzled. She knew that I was not given to much jocularity, but she discreetly retired, and, I have no doubt carried below an account of another of my strange ec centricities. "Young man," said Mr. Venner, "this JONAS LONG'S SONS. in Domestics. 5c 3c 5c 5c 24c -2and JO 2c Department Store, will never do. You must be married tomorrow, else you will bo' stealing Esther herself." A quiet wedding followed, for no one seemed to feel safe until the knot was tied. "My love." I said, as the last of the guests departed, "tow havo never read me tho conclusion of the fairy oracle. Will you do so now?," "Willingly, as this Is the proper time for you to receive the full revealment. Do you remember Its commencement?" "Yes, for I have studied It night and day. It was this: . " 'He who wooes should never tire; Constant fuel keeps the fire.' " "Your memory Is good, dear. Now hear the completion," and she gazed at my face with appealing eyes: " 'He who weds should thoughtful be; Love Is faith and constuncy.' " To this day, whenever any article belonging to the house cannot be read ily found, all eyes are at once turned upon me, und I? well I laugh as loud ly as any. Philadelphia Times. Some Tricks of the Type. Oesta Typographic. "What Is this?" exclaimed a compositor, who was expecting to be promoted to a proofieadershlp t-hortly. " 'Sermons hi stones, books In tho running brooks!' lm posblblo! Ho means, of course. 'Sermons in books and stones In the running brooks.' " And a new reading of Shakos pearo appeared next morning. A sporting compositor tjiought "Cricket on the Hearth" must bo u slip of the pen. Ho made It "Cricket on the Heath." A writer on angling had the Joy of see Ing his sentence, "Tho young salmon nro beginning to run," printed "Tho young salmon are beginning to swim," another thoughtful compositor having been et work. Happier was the transformation of the sentence, "Hrlns me my toja" Into "lirlng mo my togs." There Is a less subtle vein of humor In the story of the editor who wrote during an election, "Tho battle Is now opened. The compositor ifpelled "battle" with un "o," and the other side said, of courte, that they had Bupected It from tho 11 rut. It was by' n similar mUtuko that tho late Haker Pasha, who might fairly bo described as a "battle-scarred veteran," JONAS LONG'S go'NS: . Hosiery Dept. . Only one thing you can't find in our Hosiery Depart ment high prices. Good hosiery for the least money always. Women 's-LisIe Thread Hose in plain and Richelieu ribbed, sold in all stores at 45c and 50c This sale 2ic Women 's'Fine Cotton Hose, worfft at the least 20c. This sale -jq Misses' Fast Black Cotton Ribbed Hose, sizes from 6 to 9, worth 25c. This sale IOC Boys' Fine Quality Black Cotton Hose, heavy ribbed, seamless, solid black, worth 36 cents a pair. This sale iLq Men's Seamless Fast Black, Half Hose, guaranteed stain less dye, worth 20c. This sale I0C was called a "battle-scared veieran," tlul libel being by no means purged when tlul newspaper called tho gallant oflicer al "bottle-scarred veteran. Owing' to an error In printing tho an nouncement, "A sailor going to vu hlH wlfo desires thu prayers of the congre gation," became "A sailor going to see his wlfo deserves too prayers oc tne congre gation." The statement "Messrs. s pro. serves cannot be beaten," was rather I- tlatcd ns an advertisement bv tho onm of "b" in the last word. Innocently say was the newspaper re- port which said that the London exprw had knocked down a cow and cut It Into "calves." VA'll AM) TI1F, BISHOP. From tho Philistine. William of Alban. otherwise knowniu Hlshop Doane. Is usually calleiLsXiJ Lord" when traveling In Enslajrra, AnA In fact ho Is said to be rather 1 irtlal tn the title In Anurlca certainly e never ivtcnts tho soft Impeachment. Kot long ago the good bishop was at ulenmoud. Vn.. and was entertained nt tlia palatial' homo of Mujor Obiter. Kphralm, a hou-.; servant, was especially set apart tn 100M after tho bishop' wants and particularly Instructed by .Mrs. Ginter that he rrunt always address the bishop as -"My Ia,i Eph had not seen tho bishop arrived but after tho great man had been iWn to his room Eph was told to go up nrfd Se If he wanted anything. Eph tarped at tho door, tho bishop opened It. nml Eph was qulto overcome by the knoe ylrqechns. leggings nnd rhovel hat. yet hemanaged to ask If anything was icquirart. "Yes." said the bishop, "btlng me swine shaving water. "Yes,, my Clod!" said Kphand brought a pitcner or ic water. CAN THIS ItlTUURT From the Wllkes-Harr Record. J Thu Record hoppts to know thai this action of tho Luzerfue county comtfittoei In calling snap coiscmions for thtBelec tlon of stato dolegtes is In purauufl-o of tho programme formulated by tate Chairman Elklnnnd Senator Wlllljii H. Andrews, who tave undnrtaken m cap ture tho next tate convention In tho in-M terest of n pafrtlculiir candidate for gov. ernoi in theAime manner as the crthven- tlon of 1W0 as secured for Delainater.
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