COUNTY AUVUUA1 fc IUDGWAY.PA., FEB. 5, 1870. NO . 17- VOL 1. PUBLISHED WEEKLY, at r eh a ijrjr ujn. Itates of Advertising. Adra'r and Ex'rs notices, cac, 6 times. $ 8 00 Auditor's notices, each, , 3 00 Cautions and Estrays each, 3 times 3 00 Transient Advertising per squre of 8 lines or less 3 times, or less 2 00 For each subsequent insertion 50 Official advertising for each square of 8 liner or less 3 times or less ..2 00 For each subsequent insertion 50 Professional cards, 6 liner, 1 yr G do Lonl notices, per line, one time 15 Obituary notices, over 6 lines 10 r early Advertising, one-half column 50 00 r early Advertising, one column 100 00 Blanks, singlo quire 2 50 ftlanUs, three quire 2 00 Blanks, 6 quires , per quire 1 75 lilauks, over 6 quires per quire t...l 50 For bunk notes, subpoenas, summons, ex ecutions, warrants, eonstable sales, road and ecliool orders, each per doz...25 .Handbills, eight sheet 25 or less 1 '50 " fourth sheet 2") or less 2 50 " half sheet 25 or less 4 50 -whole sect 25orless 8 00 Over 25 of each of above at proportionate rates. COUNTY OFFICERS. President Judge S. P. Johnson. Additional Lav Judge Ilou. Jho. P. Vincent. Associate- ' Judges E. C. Schultze, Jesse Kjler. District Attorney J. K. P. Hall.. Sheriff Jacob MeCauiey. Prothonotary &c., Fred. Fchceuing. Treasurer Claudius V. (J i 11 is. Co. Superintendent Uutiis Lucore. Commissioners II. Warner, Jos. W. Taylor, Louis Vollmr. Auditors Clark Wileos, George 1). Messenger, and Joseph Wilhehn. County Surveyor t!eo. Walmsley. Jury Commissioners. Georre Lickiusu, and Horace Little. TIME OF HOLDING COURT. Second Monday in January. List Monday in A pril. First Monday in August. Filet Monday in November. RAILROADS- FUIIAE L1KIA to r?.I2 EilLBOiD. W1NTEII TIME T.U'I.F. ON and after MONDAY, NOV. 25ili. the I r:t ins on ti e Philadelphia & Jirii llHili'uad will run as follows : wkstwaro. Mail Train leaves l'hihidi-lp liia 0 :"i p. 111 " " Ridgway 2.00 . in. " ' arrive at la ic i.; p. in. Erie Exp loaves Philadelphia 115') a. m. " ' " Ridgway 8 S'l a. in. ' " arrive at Erie 10 00 a. 111 I ASTW.WU). MailTraiu leaves Erie 8.40 a. m. " " ' Riilirway 2.50 p. 111. " " arrive at Phtlad'a .- a. m. Erie Express leaves Kne 4.(K) p. 111. " "idway !,-41 P- ni. " ar-at Philadelphi.i 12 4) p.m. Express i-asi co-tiutets at Corry, Mail eat nl C01 ry and Irvinton with trains on Oil Creek Allegheny River R. II. A L. "It HI) L. TYLER. General Super! 11 undent. LLEGllENY VALLEi KAIL ROAD. Xlie only direct route to Pittsburg WITHOUT CHANGE OF CARS from Oil City. On and after Monday Nov. 22d 18G9, trains will run us follows : G'JING SOUTH Day Express leaves Oil City ut 10.30 a. m. . Ariivii g at I'itisburjc at 6, 30 p. ui. Night- Exprrss leaves Oil City at 0,3(1 p. in. Arriving at Pittsburg at 7.00 a. m. Kitlannii.g Acc. leaves Emlcnton O.lOp. ur Arriviving at Kittanning 9.00 p. in. Slixed Way leaves Oil City at 7,00 a. m. Arriviug at West Penn Junction at 7,05 p. m. GOING NORTH. Pay Express leaves Pittsburg at 7,15 a. m. Arriving at Oil City at l.oo p. m. Night Express leaves Pitifcburg at 8,00 p. in. Arriving at Oil City at ti,00a ui. Parker Ace. leaves kiuauuiug '7,20 a. in. Arriving at Parker 9,55 a. in. Mixed Wfy leave West Penn Juno, at 7,00 a. m. Arriving at Oil City at 6,00 p. m. Connections at Corry and Irvine'on for Oil City and Pittsburg. At r'raukliu with James town and Franulin R. R. Connections with W est Penn, R. R. at West Penn Junction for I'lair.vilie and all points oil the muiu line of (he Pennsylvania R. R. Sleeping Carson Night Trains. J. J. LAWRENCE, General Sup:. Tuos. M. King, Asst. Supt. 1 nnK AGENTS WANTED FOR tti ugijles and inampns ot SABNUM, Written'by him elf. In one large octavo vol umenearly 800 rages printed in English md German. 83 full page engravings. Item braces forty year recollectious of his busy life, tj a merchant, manager, banker, lecturer and tiiowuian. No book published so acceptable to a'l classes. Every one wants it. Agents aver z from 60 to 100 subscribers a week. We ofer extra inducements. Illustrated catalogue ud term to agents sent free. J. Ii. ttOKK & CO., Publishers, Ilarffori, Conn. D R C. H. FULLER, BOTANIC PHYSICIAN, RjDuwaT, Pa. BUSINESS CARDS. J. S. BORDWELL, M. D. ECLECTIC FlirsiCIAJT The word eclectic means to choose or se lect medicines from all tho different schools of medicine ,' using remedies that are safe, and discarding from practice all medi cines that have an imjurious effect on tho sys tem, such as mercury, antimony, lead, cop per, &c. I lay aside the lance the old bloodletter, reiucer or deplcter, and equalize the circula tion and restore the system to its natural state by alteratives and tonics. I shall here after give particular attention to chronic dis eases, such as Rheumatism, Dyspepsia, Liver complaint, Catarrh, Ne iralgia, diseases of the throat, urinary organs, and all uiseases pecu liar to females, &c. CATARRH I trent with a new instrument of a late invention which cures every case. X bbl H extracted without pain. Office and residence South of the jail on Centre St. Office hours from 7 to 8 a. ; m 12 to 1 p. m : 6 to 7 p. m. Vee. 2a Ci.-ly. J. S. JSUIt DVt KLb. JOHN G. HALL, Attorney at law, Ridg way, Elk county I'a. mar-22'CO ly jo, is a. HALL.... ..JAS. K. V. BALL, ITALL & BRO. Attorneys - at, - Law ST. MARY'S: BENZINGER P. O. EI K C0UNTT. PA. September 20, 180.0. ly. J. S. Bordwell, M. D. Keleeti-c Physician Olhce and residence opposite the Jail, on Centre St., Ridgway, Pa. Proaipt at tention will be given to all calls. Office hours : 1 to 8 A. M- ; 12 to 2 P. M. ; and 6 to 7 P. M. Mar. 22, Uo-tf. I7HANKLIN HOUSE, " M. Mary's, Pa. LARGEY & MA LONE. Pnoi-ii's. The proprietors respeef fully ask tho attention of their friends and the public in general to tnc.r large ana commodious hotel. Lvery aiionuou paid to tlie couvcuienee of guests. II. LARGEY. ntylO -lf'OS ly . J, A. iuALOSE. I AbLlN Kettles, Brass Kettles, Porclean I V 3 bailee Pan. French Tined Sauco Pans. hunt euns the cheapest and best, at AV. S. SERVICE S, Ikirdware.Stoie, Pidgway.Pa. YDE HOUi-E, " Ridgway, Elk Co., Pa. W. II. SCIIItAM, Proprietor. Thankful for the paironige heretofore so iilierully bestowed upon him, the new pro prietor, hopes, by paying strict attention 'o the comfort and convenience of guests, to merit a coniinuance of the same. r 5 All A V Ell IloUSfi, g RIDGWAY, PA. DiVID THAYER, Proprietor. The undersigned having fitted up a large mid commodious hotel on the southwest corner of Centre and Mill streets, with good and convenient stabling attached, respect fully solicits the patronago of his old friends and iho put lie generally. tkelSGU lj DAVID THAYER. KERSEY IfTTtlSE, Cextllvillk, Elk Co., Pa. II. B. Leach, Proprietor. Thankful for the patronage heretofore so liberally bestowed upon him, the new pro prietor, hopes, by paying strict attention to tho comfort, and convenience of guests, to merit a continuance of Iho same. vln201y. All orders for Stoves and Hardware will be promptly attended to as soon as received, at the 12 U7 St. MARY'S HARDWARE STORE. jyjORTON II0US3, KRIE. PA M. V. Moore, (late of (lie liyd House) Propi irtor. Open Dtty and Night- n30tf. CARDS, Tjill-Heads Letter-Heads, Tugs, Handbills, &c, done in a neat manner, and at the lowest trick, FOR, CASH, at the f Ik Advocate Printing Office. JOUIS II. GARNER, PRACTICAL MACHINIST, Can be found at his Foundry at St. Mary's where he is ready to have all shop-work in his Hue done on short notice. St. Mary's, Renzinger P. O , Elk co., Pa. mylWIy J D. PARSONS, Manufacturer and Dealer in Boots & Shoes, Main St., opposite Hotel, nov27y . W.Loex, Pa. TORDSOF WISDOM. FOR YOUNd MEN, 0the Ruling Pnssion in Youth and larly Manhood, wiih SELF HELP for the Erring and unfortunate. Sent in sealed letter en velopej, free of charge. Address, HOWARD ASSOCIATION, Box P. Philudeldhia. Pa. JACOB YOUNG & CO , Book Binders And Blank Book Manufacturers, Wright's Blk. Corry, Pa. B!ank Books Made to Order. HF. C. KRUMME, M. D., a rh.vsioiin and Surgeon, Ridgway Elk Co. Pa Office above store of R. G. Gillis (jihee hours from 8 to 10A.M. and 6 to 8 P. M. Tln8tf. TTENRY SOUTHER, Attorney-at-Lai (feb2'C8), .EL Ridgway, Pa. 1 EXECUTIONS, SUMMONS, SCBPOS. 2i nas, Warrants, &o., oa hand and for sale at this office. BLANKS ef all kinds for sals at this fioj. jlMt gjftiscf llang.- JURS. MERK1XS. BY LETT1CB THOIirB. Yea, I am Mrs. Selioa Metkins, nud I sincerely wish that I was uot that injured individual. Think of ill Miss Sclina Bis that was still a young woman, conipura tively, aod the mother of tcu children. There's the baby now, screaming ns if five hundred needles had been run into him. I hear people talk about tho comfort of a baby. Strange ideas of comfort some per. sons have j perhaps they'd think l'urutory comfortable. Why, I never have ouo mo., tnent's freedom from anxiety excepting wbeu tho baby's in my arms, or last asleep; and not often even then ; (or if his cheeks are a little more flushed than usual, I (eel sure that a fever is coming on ; and if his breath is not perfectly regular, visious of the eroup haunt me like a nightmare. Queer comfort, certaiuly ! If he is on the floor, he makes a wastc-bas-kct of his mouth and stuffs every abominable thing he can find into it. I just took u large sized carpet-tuck out of hi? mouth, and yestcr. day, I found him sucking an old cigi.r -tump of his father's. lie resisted manfully when I took pooession of it. He is his father's own child, that's certain. If there's a pin ou tho fl ior, he stumbles over it. Lie manages to have his faee rep resent continually, the national colors of red, white and blue especially the last; a de gree of patriotism more painful than pleas ing. lie tumbles and lumps his head so often, that it would puzzle Professor Fowler to distinguish the natural from the acciden tal developments ; and as for his uufurtu nate little noee, it hai received as many bruises as a professional prize fighter's; and although nature evideutly intended it fur Grecian, such a series of vigorous thump iogs will transform k into the II unao, be fore he is eight years old. lie is always putting his little misc'iicvious Sogers in the cracks of the door ; his left iliuuib has been squeezed five times. It makes my fieb creep to think of it all the flush I have left, which is not much. Wasn't I a simpleton to g marru d ? There's Sarah Jane S just my age, and she looks ten years younger, plump, and smooth and fair; yet she thinks she has terrible trials. I only wish she could change places wiih 1119 for awhile, and I ratlut think she would bail her lonely spinster hood again a haven of rest and unparalleled Iclicity- There's Charley coming, with big, white spots on his knees. 1 made those pants just two weeks ago, out of cloth uu inch thick, that I fondly flattered myself would last three mouths, at least. But every anxious mother knows what those white spots mean. lie wt'H persist in playing bear, and crawling on his knees. I hope wbcu bear fever subsides, he will take up- something that won't be quite so hard upon his clothes. I hear Annie Eliza and Mary Adeline quarreling in the parlor. If those giils are together two minutes they have a battle. 1 wonder where they get such' terrible tem pers from the Merkins' side of ojurse. Ma always said her house was like a dove's nest. I am afraid she would compare mine let a den of byeuas. The children all take after their father, excepting Angcline, and she is lovely. Every ono says the is just like me. There's a scream from Tommy. I hope he hasn't fallen into the hot water ; it would be just like him. He has been scalded three times 1 believe he and Sam my are just coming down with the r.ieaels. Mr. Merkins is going to bring a stranger home to dinner with him. I have just re ceived a note to that effect. There Uu't a scrap of meat in the house, and we are all out of bread. Mr. Merkins always selects the most inconvenient time to bring home company; and if everything isn't donejust right, he sulks for a week. I sometimes think my noble lord is more of a child than any of his boys ; and he expects them to be men beforo they are three years old. Considerate creatures men are ! Mr. Merkins is always wantiug me to in vite Miss Wilmott here, so that ho can enjoy intellectual conversation. He says her mind is like beautifully cultivated garden "Rich flowers of thought," etc. I rather think that if Miss Wilmott hud married at sixteen, and had ten children, those "rich flowers" would not have blossomed quite so luxuriantly. Cooking elaborate dinners, and wiping irrepressible little Doses, has lather nipping influence upon flowers of that kiud, I cau tell Mr Merkins. lie sits and listens lo Miss Wilmo't, drinking in her words as if she were a revised edition of the Pelphic Oracle. Then niter she leaves, he asks me in his blandest tones and manner: "My dear, why don't you read such books as Miss Wilmoit reads (Mrs.W's Sexology, tor instance), instead of wasting your time over so many novels V "Waste my time," indeed ! I only wish I could have the chnnee. Perhaps if Miss Wilmott were t go to bed every night 11s complete ly exhausted us I always am, she would find "Alonzo and Melissa" much better suited to her state of mind than Mrs. WilUrd's 'Sexology " I think alter admiuisterin ' repeated doses of pup and peppermint, she Wuuld find the atmimphore a little less exul ted than it is at prescut. She would fiud her womanly sympathies expending them selves rather more upon poor little doliiug htomaelis than upon expanded brains. I think it will be some time before I in. vito Miss Wilmott here again. Perhaps I'm unainiable ; but I would like to see the wife whose temper vutild not be slightly ruffled, to bear her husband compare another wo man's mind to a beautifully cultivated gar. den, and then mildly insinuate that he.r' is mere like a waste of pig-weed. If such a woman exists, site deserves 10 travel with the luftj Miss Swan, or the beautiful Cir cassian. Talk t;bout improving my mind. I won. der what time I could get for that, with ten eliihiiec, and only two servants; and Mr. Merkins never gives me money enough to buy anything ready made. I only w ish the hading women would manage to have a law passed, obliging men to put their money right into tluir wives' hands. 1 rather think -'.v. Mcikins vouhl have to dance a little to get his weekly ulluwanee for cigars. The library curtains wouldn't require wash ing quite so id tun as they do now. I hope I'm not vindictive, hut I would like to see the tul-les turned a little. There's Mr. Meikins, now, walking up Washing ui street with Miss Wilmott. I'll go an .1 put a tliin.bli lul of tea sleeping Mr. Morkii!3 hates weak lea. I don't r!iii:k I'm illnaturod. but 1 do feel slightly irritated. r;;z i:a n , iu cake jx xe yaVa. Vrein lite Gold Ili;i(Nev;.da) News, Dec. 127. Last night a scrips of eai:hii!::ke rhot-ks 1.I greater or less f ,ici and duiatioti visited this sccl'u 11, coiiiuu i.cii g at (i o'clock iu the ( veiling ; and eotttii;uid at intervals r,u til a little pst ii o'clock in the tnuraiug. There were tin ptieetible shocks iu all, and some people think they distinguished even mi.ie. 1 hey eamo in sciits tf tlnee at a tini i within n few eeeonds or minutes of each other, and according lo the best of our knowledge and belief occur red successively a. fo'lows : At G o'clock, three t-hocks; at (J 50 o'clock, three shocks; and JJ.10 o'clock, one shock. The. vihrutii lis of the first up peered in u uoilheily and Kouiherly dirtc. tion, liu the latter ot;is teemed tu be wore east and W' st. The fii.'.i shock occurred at just about C o'clock, town tin e and was the most se vero yet experienced since the land ol Washoe has belonged to Uuele Sam. It was very Etiotgly felt throughout Gold Hill cud Virginia, and it is difficult to sjy at which place ii actually was the heaicst, although at Virginia there was the great est alarm at.d damage. In both towns the populutiou'sought the streets iu a great hurry, and the end of all things was thought to be close by. Some became suddenly and unusually devout, others hi!uriousi some faint, and very many were much fr'ghtened, especially the denizens of hri'ek hotels and dwellings. Tho least frightened were gord n:echuiiies iu woodeu buildings,' or persons walking the streets. The duration of the first shock was from ten to twenty seconds, and none ol tho other much, il uuy, exceeded that length of time Much shock invariably ceased when people hud just got properly shakeo" into a state of fright thereat. The aluriu was getieiul, and the streets were alive wiih safety-seek -eis uieu, women tiud children. Eveu tLe horses iu the stables wne uliuost Klniktu from their feet by the first hock and were much frightened. The Bix. liotsts attached to the Gold Hill 'bus, standing iu front of Vesey's Exchange, started to run, but were directly cheeked. The meu in the mines, especially at Virginia, felt the shock very sensibly, and a general hurrying to the sur face was the result. At tho Yirgiuia House, on South C street, three or four of the lady boarders Tainted, and the scene is descrsbed as heart rending and seriocomio in the extreme. Many persons in that citj walked the streets ull uight, alruid to go to bed. The prisoner io tho County Jail were much frightened, but had lo stand it. Door bells were rung, and many clocks stopped running. Several brick building!" were more or less tracked or damaged, ns, for instance the front und rear walls of the Gold Hill Ex change building, the rear wall cf tho News office and others. 'I he cornico or fire wall of tho big brick building, corner of Taylor stteet, Virginia, fronting on D street, to the extent of twelve cr Siteen feet, was throwu down upon the f.idewalk, fortunately, how ever, injuring no one. The heavy biick front to the vault or safe in Wells, pargo & Co.'s Express ofiiee, iu that city, was badly cracked and shattered. Iu most of the grocery, drug cr liquor stores, more or less shelf goods wctc thiown down and smash, cd, and in I wo or three instauees, from 610 to 20 damages beiug done. Pretty much all the damage sustained was from the first shock. The second heavy one, at twenty minutes to two o'clock, was of less force, yet it was powerful enough to throw a bar of bullion, 'veighing twenty pounds, out of a pigeon hole down upon the floor, in Wells, Fargo & Co.'s Virginia office, throwing it dirastly west; the piles of coin iu the boxes were also' shaken and thrown east and west showing the vibration of that shock to have been iu that direction. In trany houses the globes and chimneys of kerosene lamps were throwu off and smashed, but fortuna tely nc lamps were broken, otherwise n conflagration might have ensued. None ol the mires were at ull injured. The earthquake was: sensibly felt at Sa cramento, Corson, P.cuo and elsewhere Cou sideiable damage was done to shelf goods iu the drug stoic at Eajton, and a chandelier thrown down came near creating a big fire, but it was quenched in lime. The -stage drivers from P.euo this morning report Steamboat Creek as flowing full to the Jaiuks, und difficult to ford ; and the stage between Carson and lleuo was detained ever an hour ou account of it, but whether this is attributable to the earthquake, or sudden rains, or melting suow, we are not exactly prepared fay. Tho Steamboat Springs arc reported to be spouting l(;Uh most furiously to the height of teu or lu teal feet. RELICS OF THE BATTLE OF LA Eh EL IE. A number of interesting relies, tlie per. si.nal property of iho late Major Henry 15. lircvooit, fiave been deposited for sale keeping and as honorable memorials among the rtC'-rda of the Mieliig in Historical So ciety. Among t!ie.-.e ale iucludcd the hat und f. void ui the galli.tit major, w:ru by him in the but tie of lake Eiic un der Commodore Peary. Among the relies, pays the Detroit Free Press, is also a card, ease, fashioned from a piece of live oak which was used in the repairing of the staunch old battle-ship, the IionsiJcs, which had gained so proud a name aud so high a fame for the fhig ol the Union aud its brave defendeis. A copy of a letter acconipnnjing a silver medal bearing tippaopriato devices com. meaior.itive of the battle, is given below. 'Iho ktttrwus uddto.-ed to marines on "Cupt. 3. lJrevocrf, late commanding mar iners ou Luke Erie ;" but the precise facts were that this tflicer was ut that titne a cap taiu iu the ScceLd Pegiment of United States, and volunteered, with his company, when tbc fleet sailed to meet the enemy : "'avy 1u-aut.mi:nt, Jan. 2, ISSo. "To Cupt. Henry 13. Uievoort, late Com manding Mariues ou Luke Eiic: Sit In c.'tnp'iaijce with a resolution by the Coup-em ol the United Stitcs, the Pi ev ident directs me to piesct.t you with a sil vcr medal, iu testimony of the high eme entertained by Confess of your gallant conduct and servi? iu the decisive und gl riousvietoiy gained on Lake Elie on the 1 Oth day of September, in the year 1S1!5. over a IJrltich tquudn.n of superior force. I am, very respectfully, your obedient servet, " Smith Tuo.Mr.soN. ORIGIX O. ' JiEEFS TEA A'. The discovery of tho chief sources ct hu. man enjoiueut has ull been attributed to some fabulous origin iu the ancient woild. The storj of that important feature of din ner, the beefsteak, was thus givtn in the middle ages : Lucius Plaucus, a llomau of of rank, was ordered by tho Emperor Tragan, for some offence, to act as one of the meuiel sucraficers to Jupiter. He resisted, but was at length dragged to the alter. There tho Iragmcnts of the victim were laid upon the lire, and tho unfortunate senator was forcibly compelled to burn them. In the process of roasting, one of tho slices slipped off the coals, and was caught by Pluucus in its fall. It burned his fingers, and he instinctly thrust thetn into his mouth. In that moment he had made the graud dioovery that the taste of a slice thus oarbonatcd was beyond all tho old sodden cookery of Rome. A new ex pedient to save his-dignity was suggested, aud ho at once evinced his obedience to tho emperor, by seeming lo go through the ex ercises with due regularity, and his scorn of the employment by turning tho whole ceremony into a matter of appetite. He swallowed every slice, deluded Trajan, dc fruded Jupiter, and iuveutcd the beefsteak. Such a discovery could not be long conceal, cd ; the sacrifices began to disappear with a rapidity and satisfaction to the particB too extraordinary to be unnoticed. The priests of Jupiter adopted the prac'.ioo with delight, and King of Olympus must have soen been starved if he depended on any share of the good things of Pome. REMEDY FOR CORXS. when a young man, I used to be very much annoyed by those pair. Jul excrcseeu. ecut called "corns" on the toes and feet un til I was told of a very simple but.effcctual remedy for them by some person. It was to bathe the feet well iu tepid water to sof ten them ; then pare them off very closely with a sharp pocket knife; then rub ou well green peach leaves; when, after con tinuing the rubbing on once or twice a day the corus will entirely disappear, and not return, without the cause which first oecas.. ioned them. I have often tried tho remedy and never found it to fail yet. It seems to ba the prussie acid iu the peach trea leaves that takes (hem away. A good corn salve could no doubt bo made for winter use by biuising tha peaoh tree leaves when green, then boil them in water until the strength is extracted, then take out tho leaves, strain the wafer of the sodim'ent, and r.dd a Fuffieicnt quantity of common rcsiu, beeswax, tallow and lard oil to make it soft euouh to simmer down without burn, ing, until the water U all evaporated. Sof ten und pare the corn as beforo directed, spread it on a small piece of cambiie or liu cn, and apply, putting ou the sock or stock ing c trefully, so as not to rub it oil. Keep applying until they disappear. E.uluuije ADVICE TO GIRLS. I1V JOSH 1111.1.1X3. My dear girls, keek cool. A blessed fu. ture twajis yu, enny how. Tafte Lessous on the piunna ut onst ; piannas are getting skaso. Pi awl means learn to pla tho nu song that has just cum eut. "When John Prown is over vc have Father Abraham cumming with thiskruel war several strong.' This stanza tuck the first premium at the stait fair. Pcn't bo afraid to get married ; yure ma want afraid. Pc vai toous and put! ty. Eat slate pencils ; they will make yu spri ut figures. Ecut kulone water, thatw'iil give yu a good smell. Let yure pettykoats drag cu the side walks, and' il euny man s'crs on them and larer r-ph the rim, slap his chops Lt onet. If you have got smull feet keep them hid small feet aiu't fash ionablo. Study travels ; Tom Moore and Py. nios aud Guliiveis, is all fust rate. If you can spare the time be luvely and sweet; retneibber one thing: (bar aiu't nothing iu this life wor.h living fur bura rich husbaud. If yu don't b'leve me, ask yure ma. If yU hav got red hair y u hud better exchange it for black ; black tha tell is going to be worn muchly next year. Don't Imv eny thing tew du with boys unless (ha meaa bus;uess. If you don't no how tew skate, ju mite as well j:ne some traveling numry ut onst, for yure played out. . FOMEIHINU PiEM. ' HIUBf.K. All old gentlemuu, who wus something of an an tiquary, retired to spend his evening of lito 111 a remote village in one of the Welsh counties. He whs exceedingly desirous of picking up whatever infoiuiution he could find respecting the locality iu whiuk he had fixed himself. In oni of these rambles he c ucountcred tin old Wehh faimcr, wbeu tha following dialoguo ensued: " Good morning, frieud. Can you tell me if theie is anything remnkable in this Ltigbboihood ?' "Anything remarkable, did you say ?" inquired the old farmer, not quite suit, what Was meant by the word. "Yes, my good man; anything remark, ble." "0! ay; well iss !" exohiimen the far mer, as a light broke upon him; "iss, iss -remarkable-ay. indeed ! Do you w that nihl. sir? Do you see that field! Wll, it vu. there that Oliver Cromwell fought wiu Julius Saisar 0
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