Ijc imc0, New filoomftcto, JJa. A' Green Clerk. COUSIN HARRY Is as handsome a fellow as the most fastidious among my lady readers would wish to see, and that is saying a great deal for cousin Harry, when odo takes into consideration the recherche taste of the ninoteonth oentury, Harry is a country shopkeeper f?ro cery dealer, I mean ; . that 4s, he sells pork, beef, fish, . oil, molasses and such articles, upon ono side of the store, aud oalicoes,de laincs, sheetings, muslins, and a very few silks, uponthe otlicr side Harrj'a " custom was very extensive a handsome young man in a dry-goods store is, in himself, a sort of a sign ; and a good looking olerk is worth a hundred dollars a year .more than an ugly goo. , It is a la mentable fact, and I am sorry to record it ; but it is so. ' Lasteummer, I was up at undo John's a visiting. Harry and royousin Jennie were the chief attractions at uucle John's ; but the fine strawberries and raspberries, with which, the kitchen garden abounded, were not usually despised by me. .-'' r " One morning, Harry received an urgent summons to attend the bounty court in a neighboring town, as a witness in an im portant caso. Ho was obliged to go off in a hurry, and having no time to look up a substitute In bis store, lie appointed me to the dignity. " You can't fail of doing right, Charley," said be, patronizingly ; " the goods are all marked in plain figures that is, the dry goods ; and thon molasses soils for fifty cents per gallon sugar ten to fourteen cents; butter is worth one shilling, store pay ; and mind you, Charley, eggs are twenty cents a dozen, but don't take any unless they'll sink readily in cold water they way be rotten,you leuow; and the but ter, too, don't take any without putting in a fork into each ball to try it it might bo rancid ; and above and over all, my boy, be polite to the pretty girls ! Good-bye" and Harry put the big brass key of the store (my insignia of authority) into my hand, and leaped into tho cab which was to take him to the depot. I felt somewhat dignified as it were promoted from the rank of a private to that of a captain aud I weut up to my room, at uncle John's, for a survey of my toilet. I'm rather a good-looking fellow myself, though some straight-laced people might flunk it vanity in me to mention it, but all Uie girls say so, and it is generally conceded that they are competent judges. By way of enhancing my personal at tractions. I added to my dress a pair of wrought wristbands, (don't laugh,uufeeling reader ; they were embroidered and pre sented to me by a lady friend,) and giving a parting twist to my moustache, I sallied out. The morniug was fresh and fair uo grim clouds cast their boding shadows over the earth and all promised fair for my success. I arranged myself behind the coun ter and waited for customers. Customer No. 1 entered. She was a middle-aged woman, to buy da bege for ber "darter's gownd." ' I was all alacrity to fulfil her commands. I piled the counters with what I supposed to be de bege, a sort of thin, glossy,. rattling stuff ; and with all my eloquence, I expa tiated on its wonderful merits. , " There's silk iu it, ain't there?" queried the old lady, putting on ber spectacles for a nliuiaii cva m in ci ti. 111 It Uaa AT nuu inr dressmaker, said so !" , ; i "Silk 1 to be sure there is !" (aid I, im mediately taking my cue, (it doesn't do to contradict a lady,) "silk 1 why it's all silk, the real, fine Italian boiled silk sewing silk, inarm, imported expressly for your daughter's wear 1 It'll last an age I" , ' , "Well, she'll want it to wear a pretty good spell, I reckon ; a body can't afford to buy a gownd every day, you know 1" " Of course not marra ; of course not I 'But this will look sweetly on your pretty daughter, no doubt she's pretty resemblos ber mother, I dare say I" I had heard it said that a little judicious fluttery never comes amiBR with the ladies. ' " Law bless your heart, sir, gully ain't nowise handsome 1 she ain't nigh as good looking as I was in my young ' days ! her aose is too crooked, aud her hair's red ! bvt then Bam Jackson thinks she's splen doriferousl That's what he says, any way." "No doubt, marm, but Mr. Jackson is a man of taste probably a, connection of Andww Jackson, the patriot and presi dent! How many yards would you like?", and 1 lourlubed the yard-stick; with a pro fessional air, which would have done credit to coiww Harry himself. , . ".Qh, top a minit ; I ain't decided about v it yet What's the price ?"; .. Very' true ; there must be a price, I supposed, but I had forgottou such a con tingency. ; However, there would be no difficulty about that, for Harry had said ,tbe goods were all marked iu plain figures, so I turned complacently to the card at tached to the doth. , . . .. " r. .. 2.": ;:. Very explicit. Like the Hebrew Bible to me, but I . took a moment to consider. I'd put it low enough, I thought, to induce her to trade ; and it wouldn't do to appear as if I didn't understand my business. I might lose cotte with the old lady. "Well," said I, " though it's a great sacrifice really giving it away I'll let you have it for one shilling per' yard t Dirt cheap, but as it is for your pretty daughter, I'll put it down bolow cost I I wouldn't do it," said I, leaning down over the counter close to tho old lady's green calash " I wouldu't do it for another person iu the world 1" My answerseemed.to please tbe old lady. She turned the fabric over and over, felt of it upon both sides, triod the strength of its texture with her thumb and finger, and at lost gave the order. ; i .'.' , , , ; . . . " Eight yards and a half, good measure 1 and Bilk to sew It up with." ' I cut off the desired quantity, folded six skeins of sewing-silk Inside it; the lady paid for it in odd nlnepences and sixpences, and I bowed her out of the store. Enter customor No. 2. A seedy-looking man, in a grey blouse, to get two cents' worth of black snuff, I searched around awhile among the mysterious boxes and barrols, and at last pitched upon the strong-smelling article. Wrapped up a couple of ounces; delivered it to my customer, and received in return two coppers, which Noah might have coin ed In the Ark while waiting . for dry weatber. i - Customers No. 3, were two pretty, red cheeked girls one with butter to sell, the other with a pail of eggs, destined for tbe same purpose as tho butter. I remembered Harry's injunction about tho eggs, butter, cold wator, and fork-pricking ; but for the the life of me, I couldn't recollect which test' was to be applied to the butter, or which to the eggs. I wanted to oblige tho pretty girls, so I took both butter and eggs into the back store, determined to do some thing with them. After a few moments' consideration, 1 procured a fork and pierced each and all of tho eggs separately and the result was astonishing ! out of two dozen, six were positively in a state of decomposition ; thirteen were occupied by remarkably well grown juveniles of the fowl race ; and the remaining five wore smelling decidedly old. The butter wouldu't sink in tho water do all I could, pop it would come up to the surface again ; and I was obliged, though reluctantly, to decide that it wouldn't do to take either the butter or tbe eggs. So I returned to the front part of the store again, bearing the pail of mutilated eggs in one hand, and the butter in the other. "I am sorry ahem ! that is, I regret that the eggs are too too old for our pur pose ; and the butter we don't take butter now !" You should have seen the pretty young ladies' faces blaze up I The one with the eggs muttered something about "City greenhorn 1" and the butter-girl exclaimed aloud, " What better could have been expected fiom such a gosling?" I was fain to conciliate them by the gift of three sticks of candy apiece, and telling them I broke the eggs by accident. After the girls, came a hard-looking old gentleman in quest of pork. ' He wanted the " home-made, native pork none of ycr Western hog cholera stuff!" I made a tour of the suBpiclous-lookiug barrels in the cellar gazed apprehensively at my wrought wristbands found a barrel which smelt of pickle; and procuring ' a pair of long-handled pincers from the coal bin, I made a plunge into the cask with them. Nothing whatever came up to re ward my efforts ; and I was making prepa rations' for a second dive, when down came my' hard-looking friend to see bow 1 was getting on. : - " .' , "Put yer bands in, ye abominable young dandy ! What are ye afraid of, I wonder? In with yer bands !" My friend was a little out of patience with me. I couldn't bear the appellation of dandy, so I plunged my hands and arms into the pickle, aud brought up a whole layer of pork. . Instinctively I looked at my wristbands. Lucky that Isabel Itlcliborn wasn't there to look also ! I tore them off and flung them into the furnace, glad to : escape a second sight of their fair (?) proportions. ? Served ye right 1" said my hard-looking friand, with evident satisfaction, "a man has no business with such flumma diddles particularly if he goes pork-fish ing 1" , , I seized the pork - and held it ready for delivery. ,, " You'll have to trust me, I hain't got the money to sparo, jest now !" said be, taking the purchase and making off. "Stop, sir ! stop 1" I screamed after him, " none of that 1 we don't credit 1" The old man suid nothing, but laid down the pork on a box, and weut out. . Directly he- returnod with Deacon . Cutter and Squire Brown, with both of whom I was acquainted. , "Here's my bondsmen,'' said be, lead lug up the gentlemen ; Squire, what's my sUudin'?" , . . . t , f Worth at the least calculation, Charley," said the squire,' turning to me, "at tbe least calculation, two hundred tbousuiid dollars!"! ,., . . .-. . . "And you wouldu't trust him for ten pounds of pork, eh, Charley !" laughed Deacon Cutter " but that's too good ! ha 1 ha! I declare!" " So much for appearances ! Ever since then, I never see an old, ragged , man, be longing in the country, without saying to myself, 'There goes a man of property !" After this, customers came in so fast that it would be impossible to particular ize. I sold almost everything ; from silk dresses down to clothes-pins and penny whistles. My success in drawing bargains was- remarkable, and -it , was near sunset, and yet 1 bod no dinner for the day. The fact of it was, that at dinner time I was so full of customers that I didn't like to leave tbe store for fear of, losing a trade, ' and now I found myself possessed of a singular longing for fragrant tea and hot biscuit. I knew my pretty cousin Jennie would be sure to have both ready for me. ' I was just congratulating myself on my good luck for the day, and thinking how surprised Harry would be, when he return ed, at finding so much of his summer stock disposed of when in rushed the identical old lady who had bought tbe de bege in the early part of the day. She looked furious, and bore in her baud a bundle, which seemed suspiciously like the one she had carried away from the store that morning. " nand over my money I it's notbin' but six ponce cambric t Miss Moss, the dress. makcr says so ! you young cheat of a scamp! you deceived me I Hand over my money, I say ! Before I could get breath to reply, the man who had purchased the two cents' worth of snuff made his appearance. " Sir," said he, with dignity, " the snuff you sold me this morning is villainous black pepper, and my' wife has nigh killed herself with taking it ! Sir, her nose is nigh as large as a turkey's egg, and grow ing larger every moment." " Give mo my money !" cried tho de bege woman. "Give me my money !" cried the suuff man. "Give me my money!" yelled a little urchin, climbing up on a crate of earthen ware to make himself more conspicuous, "you sent daddy smokin' terbaccer instid of chawin', and marm copperas instid of saleratus, aud Tom, and Polly, and the dog, is pisined with it ; and daddy's got the trembles all over with the terbaccer !" "Sir, I called to get back my money !" said - a fat man, in a yellow waistcoat, "you sold me indigo instead of blue vitriol." " Give me my money !" cried tho de btge woman. "Hand over my money!" screamed the infuriated snuff man. " Give me my money money mon ey !" roared the whole potte in chorus. I sprang over the counter, nearly knock ing down cousin Harry in the doorway, and never stopped until I was safe on the sofa by the side of sympathizing cousin Jennie. Harry told me afterward that my day's shop-keeping cost him fifty dollars, beside losing forever the custom of the two pretty girls who bad brought the butter ; and highly offending tho old de btge woman and ber red-haired daughter, Sally, including the illustrious Sara Jackson. As for me, I've been tbe happy husband of cousin Jennie for two months ; and of course don't care a straw for all the pretty girls in America, because (in my own opinion) I am the proprietor of the best and prettiest wife in the whole world. ' A Short History of Pennsylvania. BEFORE it was taken possession of by the Europeans the territory now call ed Pennsylvania was occupied by various tribes of Indians of which the chief were the Dclawares, Six Nations, and Shaw nees. ' " '' '' In 1801 King Charles the Second granted Pennsylvania to William Pcnn and gave it the present name. In 17C0 the second State constitution was adopted. i The Delawares, so called by the whites from the river on whose banks they wore first met, and where they chiefly resided, were the most numerous nation in the province.. They called themselves Lunni Lenape, or the original people.. , They were also sometimes known by the name of Algonquins. , . The Shawnees, a portion of a different nation, were settled near Wyoming, and some of them on the Ohio, below Pitts burg. , The celebrated Five Nations seemed originally to have owned northwestern Pennsylvania. Tbe Onondagos, Cayugas, Oneidas, Sonecas and Mohawks first com posed this remarkable and powerful con federacy. To this were subsequently ad ded the Tuscaroras after which they were called the Six Nations. On the 24th of October, 1082, William Peun arrived at his new province in the Welcome. Ho first landed at New CastlA, iu the present State of Delaware. At this time Delaware also belonged to Penn,, by grant of tbe Duke of York, the king's brother, but did not long continue connect ed with Pennsylvania. In ' 1707 the southern line of the State was finally run and settled by Mason and Dixon. 1 In September, 1774, the first Congress met at Carpenter's Hall, iu Philadelphia. . On tbe 15th of July, 1770, independence having boen declared, a State convention, -in Philadelphia, met and framed a consti tution for Pennsylvania as a free and sov ereign State.- At that time the population was about 800,000. . .'' ' , '. In 1777, after the battle of Brandywine, Congress adjourned to Lancaster, and thence to York ; and Philadelphia fell into the hands of the British, who retained it till June, 1778. In the last-named year Congress returned to Philadelphia, whore it remained till 1800, rwhen it removed to Washington. ! In 1780 slavery was abolished in Penn sylvania. Tin 1781, by the advice of Robert Morris, Congress incorporated the Bank of North America, which was the first bank jn the Union. ' ' ' ' ' ''. In 1793, Pennsylvania purchased the Erie triangle land from the United States government. " - :.;'( In 1704, the turnpike from Philadelphia to Lancaster was completed at a cost of $405,000, being the first in the Union. In ' 1800, Lancaster became the seat of State Government, and that of the Union was removed from Philadelphia to Wash ington, D. C. In 1812 the seat of government was trans ferred to Harrisburg. ' ' ' 1, . I ' ; ,, . Snoozer Sprinkles tlio Street. ., A PHILADELPHIA man living on Spruce street went homo one night recently filled up to the collar with benzine. Feeling rather "warm for the season," Mr. Snoozer, for it was Snoozer, took off his coat and boots, put on his slippers, aud getting the garden hose went out tosprink lo the street, bo as to make things cool around there. Now, it takes a quick, discerning, calculating eye and a steady haud to properly manipulate a hose in the day-time. At night the difficulties are multiplied. But Mr. Snoozer's mind was simply on the subject of spriukling. He gave the hydrant wrench several twists,and had on a full head. After a few crackles and spirts, a steady stream was let fly right on the boots and white linon pants of a man with a red rosebud on the left lapel of his coat, who was coming np from a call in Fourth street. Tbe man Btopped sud denly in surprise, and Snoozer, noticing the mishap, in tho true spirit of a thorough bred gentleman, advanced to render an apology, when the nozzle was turned a quarter of an inch to the larboard, and poured a stream right agalust tbe stran ger's immaculate bosom. . The latter might have got red-hot at this treatment, and showed fight, were it not impossible to do so under the cooling influence brought to bear, and to avoid further disaster, the rose-bud and linen pants popped around the corner into an alley. Vr Mr. Snoozer was then proceeding quietly to cool off the bricks of the pavement, when a gentleman, with two ladies, two shawls, and one sore boil on his arm, walk ed up from a Vine-street beer gardon. To prevent another catastrophe, the hoseman turned the squirting apparatus toward the open street, without the least intention of pouring about four gallons of river water down the backs of a lady and gentleman who were riding by In a tilted-top car riage. The gentleman, in words usually expressed in print in dashes, told of his displeasure, and uttered threats against Snoozer's life. Mr. Snoozer said it was purely accidental, that he was willing to take it all back that there was no sense in crying over' spilled water. While he thus engaged in an explanation, ' he was perfectly oblivious of the nozzle in his hand. He was as innooeut as an unborn babe of knowing that a stream, running at the rate of forty knots an hour, was sailing through the open window of a second-story bed-room in the adjoining house, where a man and his wife were sloeping. He never dreamed of such a thing until foinale shrieks were heard and a man in white raiment appeared (it the window and fired off seven shots from a revolver. Then Mr. Snoozer concluded he would shut off steam. But he had mislaid the wrench. Ho, however, kept the gathering mob at bay uutil his wife rushed out, haul ed liim into the house, and prevented riot and bloodshed. No arrests.,; tW A Judge and a joking lawyer were conversing about the doctrine of transmi gration of the souls of men into animals. ",Now," said the judge, "supposo you and I were turned into a horse and an ass, which would you prefer to be?" " Tho ass, to besure," lepliod the law yer. " Why," asked the judge. "Because I have heard of nn ass' being a judge, but a horse never." People who are not overwise must expect to pay for their whims as the Iowa man did. He went back on his own true love because she ate onions, and the jury gave ber $3,200 damages. How much bet ter for him if he bad offset her by eating Limburger cheese. li!J Here is the pithiest stumoo ever preached t " Our ingress into life is naked and bare, our progress through life I trouble ana care ; our egress out or it we know not where but doing ' well here, we shall do well there ; I could not tell more by preaching a year." HEAL ESTATE At Private Sale. The nnderslaned will xoil i.t nrl,.to hi. liable farm situate In Jhiilata township, Ferry co.. Pa., adjoining lands of ueorge Tliell. George Ickes and others, containing 01 ACfeES," of Red Slate land, about 7fi Acres are cleared, and In a. high stato of cultivation, lue balance is well set with timber. The Improvements are a cood two tmv ta and Weatherboarded ' ' ' . ... DWELLING HOUSE,. LARGE BANK BARN, TENANT HOUSE, CARRIAGE ITOITBE, NEW uvu rr.il nuu hvuw iiuucc. , i There In Also A Wall nf frond wnt-Ar tinar thu. honse. - lliere are also TWO GOOD APPLE ORCH ARDS on this farm, with a variety of other fruit' trees. This nrnoartv In tt.tr t.lm vulture nf Mnrlr ia- vllle In a Rood nelgfihorlioodv Any person desiring to pnrehase a home, should see this properly before making a final invest ment. Price 15,000 s payments, 2.000 on the 1st of April, 18i4, at which time a deed will be delivered, and possession given . The balance to be paid In thrceemial annual payments, with Interest, to be secured by Judgment bonds. , . . , "Call on or address JACOB KLINE, Markleville, Perry co., Pa., on I.EWIfl POTTER. 2it Mew Blooiulleld, Perry co., Pa. The Best Is the Cheapest! THE SINGER SEWING MACHINE. SINGER SINGER MACHINE... MACHINE.. MACHINE. MACHINE.. r MACHINE... MACHINE . MACHINE. hV nr a niiTxrr SINGER SINGER SINGER,, SINGER SINGER SINGER iAl 5 MACHINE. .-MACHINE. rUNGER SINGER MACHINE. rrHE SINGER SEWING MACHINE Is so-'well A known that It Is not necessary to mention ITS MANY GOOD QUALITIES I ' Every ono who has any knowledge of Sewing Machines knows that it will do . - i EVERY KIND OF WORK, In a Superior Manner. . The Machine Is easily kept In order; easily op erated, and Is acknowledged by all, to be the' The Best Machine in the World ! Persons wanting a Sewing Machine shonld ex amlne the Singer, before purchasing. They cam be bought on the Most Liberal Terms OF F. 7IOIITOIEK, ' 'I ... : NEW BLOOMFIELD, TA., General Agent for Perry County; . WOr of the following Local Agents on the same terms: A. F. KEIM, . Newport, Pa. ' .IAS. P. LONG, " '' ' Duncannon, Pa- ' Professional Cards. JE. JUNKIN. Attorney-at-Law, New Bloomlteld, Perry co., Pa., Ofllce Next door to the residence of Judge Juukln. 45tf AM. MARKEL, Attorney-at-Law, New ltloomtleld, Perry county, Pa. -Office with Chas. A. Harnett, Esq., Centre -Square, adjoining Mortimer's Store. JE WIS. POTTER, , , ATTORNEY AT LAW, . NEWBLOOMFIELD, PERRY CO., PA. "Clalms promptly secured and collected.. Writings and all legal business carefully attend edto. ... . . i ., . 32 yl JAMES If. FERGUSON, Attorney-at-Law, NEWPORT, PA. WOftlce Market Street, near the Square. S5 6 CHARLES H. SMILEY. Attorney at Law. New liloomtlold, Perry Co. Pa. Office with O. A. Barnett. Esq., next door to Mortimer's store August 20, 1872 "TTM. A. SPONSf.ER, Attorney-at-Law, Vy Ofllce adjoining his residence, on East Main street. New UlooiuUeld, Perry co., Pa. 8 2 ly C MAS. A. BARNETT, Attorney-at-Law, t M..u. ril,.An.l..l.l I ,...-.- 1a 3-0 nice adjoining Moitlaier' Store. 34 ly" JBAlLY.AttorneyatLaw, New Bloomlteld, FerryCo., Pa. 44 Office opposite the Court House, and two doors east of the Perry County Bank. Refers to B. Mclutli e, Esq. June 27, 1871. JOHN G. 8HATTO, Surgeon Dentist. New Hloomlleld, Perry co., Pa. All kinds of Mechanical aud Surgical Dentistry done In the best manner, and at reasonable prices. VOfilce at his residence, one door East of the Robinson House, aud opposite Win. A. Spousler's Lawollice. - 3 21y WM. M. BUTCH, - , ATTORN EYAT-L AW. New hloomlleld, Perry co., Pa. y-Ofrlce Two doors West of F. Mortimer Store 3 7 ly CHAS. J. T. McINTIRE, Attorney-at-Law, New Hloomlleld, Perry co.. Pa. T All professional business promptly audfaith fully atteuded to. 3 1 lv. 1TM. N. BKIBERT, AtToTney-at Law, Y New Blooiulleld, Perry co., Ta. Hloomlleld, 3 33 lv. IE WIS POTTER, NOTABr PUHUO, New Bloom J field. Perry Co., Pa. Deeds, Bonds, MortguKes and Leases carefully prepared and acknowledgements taken. All kinds of Pension aud Bounty papers drawn and certified, will also take depositions to be rer.d In anv court In the United btutes. 7 IU ly M. A. MOUItlHOX, . JUSTICE OK THE PEACE anil OKMEUAL, COLLECTOR, NewGkhmantown, Perry eo., Pa. Remittances will be made promptly tor all Collections made. 7 44 H yiLLIAM M. SUTCII, Justice or Hie react, AND GENERAL COLLECTOR, New Bloomfleld, Perry County, Penn'a -Special attention paid to Collections of all kinds. Deeds, Bonds, Mortgages and Agreements -eatlyn executed, ,; . . "lull Auctioneer." The undersigned gives notice that he will cry sales at any point In Perry or Daupln counties, orders are solicited aud prompt attention will be given. ,. J. D. WJSJ.I.H, New Buffalo, ; i-eiry Co.,P tl... SSA'Vi r. . u. ff at i i
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers