SfWS THE PITTSBirKGr "DISPATCH, "WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 13," 1890. 9(jt M$$t ESTABLISHED FEBRUARY 8, ISIS, ' VeL , ISo. 187. Entereo" atPlttsbdrgrostoflce. JJoveiaber M, 1K7. as second-class nutter. Business Offlc6 Corner Smlthfleld and Diamond Streets. Netrs Booms and Publishing House 75, 77 and 70 Diamond Street. EASTERN ADVEBTIBIkG- OFFICE, BOOMS, riUBtJNE BUILDING.. SKW TOBK, -where complete flies of THE DISPATCH can always be found, foreign aovertlsers appreciate the con venience. Home advertisers and friends of THE DISPATCH, -wlille In Hew York, are also made welcome. TBS DISPATCH is reovlarly en tale a Srentano't, S Union Square, Jfew Tdrk, and 17 Ave. de r Opera, JPans, JYance. where any one wo hat been disappointed at a hotel newt ttand can obtain it. TERMS OF THE DISPATCH. rosTAcz text, in tbi ukitsd grins. DAILY msrATCK, One Year. t SM DAILT DlEPATCIt, Ier Quarter 2 00 Daily Dispatch, One Month .. TO Daily DISPATCH, lneludlngbunday, I rear. 1000 Dailt Dispatch, rneludlngBunday.sm'ths. 150 Dailt Dispatch, Including Sunday, lmonth SO Eukdat DIsrATcn, One Year. 150 Wxxxlt Dispatch, One Year 1S5 THE DAILT Disr ATCH Is delivered by carriers at :;centscer -week, or Including Sunday edition, 13) cents per week. PITTSBURG. WEDNESDAY. AUG. IS, 1890. 6ENAT0R QUAY'S KEY. Senator Quay evidently intends to strangle the "sickly kitten," as he has termed the Federal election bill. The resolution -which he introduced yesterday in the Senate can mean nothing else. It may be that Senator Quay's principal end in view is to secure the passage of the tariff bill and the general acceleration or public business. But wheth er the killing of the obnoxious elec tion bill be incidental, premeditated, or accidental, killed it will be for this ses sion if Senator Quav's resolution shall pass. The mourners will be few, we venture to say; and a great many Republicans in and ont of Congress will not be among them. It is to be presumed that Mr. Quay has not moved in this matter without consulting the leaders of the party. The resolution virtually offers the Demo:rats -a bribe to abstain from further opposition to the most essential part of the Republican legislative programme. If you will allow the tariff bill and the regular appropriation bills to pass within a reasonable time, Mr. Quay virtually says to the Democratic Senators, we will not introduce any legislation of a clearly partisan character at this session. Judging by the light of the resolu tion alone, we are inclined to thine that Senator Qnay has suggested to his party a sensible way out of the difficulty which confronts it in the Senate. The Federal election bill is a Jonah that the Republican party cannot afford to re tain if shipwreck can be avoided by throw ing it overboard. The safety of the nation's most precious interests is involved in the tariff, and to secure that such an agreement as Mr. Quay suggests ought to be accepted. The responsibility of defeating the peoDle's wishes will be easy to place if either Repub licans or Democrats refuse to countenance this compromise. A FEACErUL VICTORY. Battle flags fluttered in the streets of Bos ton yesterday, and beneath them marched thousands of veterans. The Grand Army of the Republic never presented a more im posing appearance than it did in the parade before the President. It was a pacific func tion, but it affords an illustration of the mililaiy reserve strength of the na tion. Fortunately the marching vet erans had ideal weather for their great day. There was nothing to mar the beauty and grandeur of the spectacle, and hundreds of thousands enjoyed it. Such scenes cannot but foster patriotism. The scarred battle flags of Pennsylvania touched the spectators' hearts, and we are told of tremendous cheering that greeted the long line of soldier citizens wherever it passed. All that Pittsburg can wish is that she could have been there to see, to swell the cheers, arid reoew the memories of the days in which the Grand Army of the Republio was born. THE GREEN GOODS ISSUE. The fact that some enterprising green poods man sent a circular to Mr. Russell Harrison, offering to sell him "green goods that cannot be distinguished from the real article," and to furnish him "any amount in ones, twos, fives and tens;" that Mr. Harrison turned the circular over to the postal detectives, and that tbe police are making it interesting for the green goods man, are items of news which have occu pied a goodly portion of newspaper space during the past few days. Mr. Harrison in his letter to the detectives turning over this precious .circular exhibits some feeling of wounded pride that the green goods man should consider him capa ble of Joeing taken in by such a familiar swindle; while the administration organs aieJisposed to make capital of the fact that therPresident's son is not so green as to be takes in by green goods. Possible the swindler might excuse himself for his be lief, that young Mr. Harrison having busi ness relations with the lotteries, would be willing to try the effect of a little variety in bis swindles. If so, the discovery is brought out that people will draw the line somewhere. Mr. Harrison can Bwallow lotteries, but he draws the line at green goods; and the Republican organs are en titled to all the capital they can make out of tbe fact The truth probahly is, that tbe green goods man did not know that "Russell B. Harrison, of Helena, Mont," to whom he addressed his circular is the son of the President Incomprehensible as this may aeem to Mr. Harrison, it is less derogatory to him than to the green goods man who, since he does not know Russell Harrison, argues himself unknown. But there is another peculiar phase to the matter in the statement that the police authorities have made a descent on the swindler in this case. For a score of years the attitude of the police on this familiar fraud has been that the people who send such circulars commit no offense lor which tbe police can lay hands on them. They do not sell counterfeit money; they simply try to swindle their victims; and the only punishment that has overtaken any of them was when one of them was killed by a Texan whom he had swindled two years " ago. But when the swindle is inadvertently tried on the son of the President the detec tives find that they can proceed at least to the length of a descent on the swindling cencern, and a search of its effects. In one sense it may be a good thing as showing that there are circumstances under which something can be done to stop the swindle. But it betrays a singular partiality in the action of our laws. In. the theory of the law it is no worse to try tofswindle the son of the,President than any one else. Bnt the personal position of the. recipient of the letter in this case has ) idueed an urf- 'vHiiiiiiiiiitfininni wonted sctivity on the part of the postal detectives This Trill afford a valuable precedent for other people -who are bothered Kith circulars of this sort. The postal officers having shown that they can do something with the green goods men, other people can tnrn over the circulars of the swindle to them and ex pect them to act as they did in the case of the son of theTresident. THE UNCERTAINTY OF THE LAW, A communication to the Philadelphia Press, with reference to the statement from New York that one out of four decisions by the lower courts are reversed by the higher tribunals, puts the case with regard to Penn sylvania in a different light In this case the writer, whom the Press pronounces a law yer of standing, declares that what his pro fession thrives on is the fact that if the Su preme Court has ruled on an issue, and "if we are dissatisfied with it we try again, and hit the mark once in four times." In other words, the assertion is made that by taking fonr different cases involving the same issue to the Supreme Court, lawyers have a good chance of getting final decisions in favor of both sides. This eould naturally be taken as hyper bole, if the communication did not support the assertion with examples of the most striking character. Thus, it is said that "in one case the Supreme Court has decided that if a debtor claims an exemption of $300 from levy and sale, the Court, that is, the Judge, cannot disallow it, but that a jury must decide whether it may be refused, as it xi) be a fraudulent debtor or non-resident; and in another case the same Supreme Court said that the lower court or Judge must decide the question and not a jury." On an entirely different matter the same tribunal is alleged to have ruled that in in terpretiDg a will the question is not what the dead man meant, but what is the mean ing of the words used by him; and in another case the question is not what the words used by him mean, but what did he mean. By the same authority in 'one case the assessment for damages in vacating a street is a personal charge on the property owner against whom it is assessed for bene fits, and in another that it is not a personal charge. Not only are there other instances in which the Supreme Court gets on both sides of a principle in different cases; but in one remarkable instance it gotonboth sides of the same case. In a will case the court below in structed the jury to bring in a verdict sus taining the will, and the Supreme Court re versed the case on the ground that the evi dence should have been submitted to the jury without binding instructions. On the second trial the same Jndge submitted the case in accordance with the ruling of the Supreme Court, the jury found a verdict against the will, and the cause being taken up, the Supreme Court held that the Judge should have told the jury to find in favor of the will, for doing which be had been pre viously reversed. These contradictions make a long list, which we cannot take space to give. "When we find, in the same volume of reports, that a contract tainted with fraud may be ratified and that it may not; when we learn that in one case a married woman can sue her hus band for debt and another that she cannot, then we perceive that the old sarcasm about the inability of omniscience to foretell the outcome of litigation must be modified so as to bring out the fact that if you keep at it industriously enongh you can get a decision to almost any effect from the eminent court of last resort in this State. Tin's, as the Philadelphia lawyer says, makes plenty of business for the lawyers, and gives the best chance of success to the fellow who gets the last guess. The first effect of these assertions is the humorous one; but it is nevertheless a very serious matter. If these citations are not either very much perverted or absolutely factitious, the fact that in so many cases the Supreme Court has absolutely contradicted itself on matters which should be settled by immutable prineiples, is a very grave one. It reduces the science of jurisprudence to a game of chance and makes the development of fixed principles in settling disputes at law about as equitable as a cast of the dice. If these assertions are not a libel upon the highest tribunal in this State, the first work of legal reform should be to enable the Su preme Court to stick to its own decisions. A PARTISAN BOOMERANG. A very striking example of the inconve nient results of legislation to secure partisan advantage is presented by the experience of Cleveland as a result of its population shown by the last census. Heretofore Cleveland has been a city of one grade and Cincinnati a city of another. Cleveland was Republican and Cincinnati Democratic. Consequently, a Republican Legislature, comprising the representatives from Cleve land, passed laws putting the government of Cincinnati in the hands of a number of municipal boards, leaving the Mayor a mere figure-head. This put the government of Cincinnati largely intdRepublican hands. But the boomerang comes in the shape of a discovery that the census advances Cleve land to the same rank as Cincinnati, and consequently she must pass under the rule of the municipal boards, and lake the medicine which she helped to provide for Cin cinnati. In the meantime, a Democratic Governor of Ohio has been elected, and he will have the appointment of the boards, so that Cleveland is to be nicely fitted out with a Democratic city government, whether her people are Democratic or not Under ordinary circumstances the Repub licans of Ohio would find little difficulty in going back on their record and .changing the law to rescue the city patronage of Cleveland from the hands of the Democrats while keeping that of Cincinnati in those of the Republicans. But the Ohio Legisla ture, just at this juncture, is Democratic, also; and there is little doubt that the Dem ocrats will forget their own protests against the Cincinnati law, sufficiently to let it take effect in Cleveland, and give the Republi cans of that city a full dose of their own medicine. "Where political spoils are at stake, consistency and principle are not worth taking into consideration. "While this outcome of their own legisla tion is a little rongh on the Republicans, no one is likely to waste much sympathy on them Thev fully deserve the lesson that the attempt to secure political supremacy by legislative enactment is as dangerous at the breech as at the muzzle. AN INCREDIBLE REPORT. It is surprising to observe that some of the prominent Representatives of Pennsyl vania Republicanism are indulgincLin that liberty of comment and threaten that inde pendence of action, which is characteristic of the bated Mugwumps. That some mem bers of Congress should kick over the party traces is not incomprehensible; but when we are told that Congressman Reyburn and even Senator Quay are speaking their own minds about a party measure, we must take refuge in incredulity. Yet there is a report that Mr. Beburn -' n-rffiffitti Jb&li- ' SA lufvn&TKLX)? 1 Hi. JjHIHWI II WW I' ' II IWH i ! 'I'WTWW WfPPHIWIIIWIIHIIll'WIIsslWllll WHWHWH HaWiWIII lllllllMllssllMJl IIMHi iff i'IIIWtWMiHIIi B Mill' I n i-ll-!!LmaS WKtKaOtHeW has unreservedly declared that the Federal election bill is all wrong, and that if he gets another vote on it he will vote against it; while Senator Qnay is even more unkind, saying, as is alleged, that it is "a sickly kitten and will not live long enough to be come full grown." "We cannot believe that these eminent Republicans ever gave ex pression to such wicked and revolutionary sentiments. They must both know that this measure has received tbe sanction of the caucus, and is declared by Republican authority to be nothing more than a fulfil ment of the party pledges. To rebel against, or throw contumely upon, a measure sur rounded by those sanctions, is, according to the ethics of these very Republicans, party treason; and we have tbe eminent authority of Mr. Richard Quay that "no traitors are wanted" around where he is. It this awful report were true, the next breeze would have wafted the tragic news from the capital that the Spartan Dick had disowned his Sena torial papa. These are our reasons for declining to be lieve that Messrs. Quay and Reyburn have been indulging in such subversive talk. They may think such things; but they as suredly could not be capable of pointing the finger of scorn and ridicnleat a meas ure which has received the awfnl sanction of the party caucus. ALL ON THE CREDIT SIDE. Some interesting testimony to the growth of Pittsburg is to be found in another col umn, wherein it is shown how it has been found necessary to reduce the tax levy upon the wards concerned in the special city con solidation tax in order to avoid paying off the debt too soon. The commissioners who arranged the basis of the tax twenty years ago had no idea that Pittsburg was destined to wax fat and wealthy in the fashion it has. But the Commissioners were no more shortsighted than the rest of the world then, and very possibly twenty years hence Pittsburgers will laugh at our occasion for self-congratulation to-day. How's this? Here is the New Xork Tribune, whose editor has a pleasant foreign post, declaring that a number of Republican Senators, including our own Mathew Stanley Quay, are habitually absent from important roll-calls and intimating that they have no right to go away "seeking pleasure at summer resorts, or attending to private business or laying pipe to control party nominations?" If the Tribune does not take care it will get Itself disliked as a hated mugwump. The Chinese people are reported to be tearing up the railroad tracks as fast as they a re built, believing that the floods of the past few years wero caused by the railroads. The Chinese appear to have drawn some indefinite and hasty conclusions from a study of the amount of water in American railways. The New York World takes the trouble to defend New York City against the charge.of a Philadelphia paper that "New York seeks to have a monument built to General Grant for her own glorification." This shows a decided misapprehension of the matter. No particular complaint has been made that New York is seeking to have a monument built; but the basis of the indictment is that she shows much less disposition touild the monument than to build stables at Riverside Park. The publication or a report that a Russian has just died at the age of 103, after going to bed drunk every night for eighty years, is exceed ingly indiscreet It will insDire a number of topers the world over, with a scheme to use the same method in the hope of living to the age of a thousand years. The fact that golck exports have reduced the New York bank reserves 8,000,000 In the past two weeks, notwithstanding Treasury dis bursements of nearly twice that amount, and that the surplus reserve is only fjl,000,QOO at the beginning of the fall movement, is an indica tion that the Treasury has got to resume Its function of sustaining Wall street, or this fall will be a bad period for financial kite-flying. Ix is reported that three Colorado million aires. Hill, Cooper andTabor, are ready to enter the market for Senator Teller's seat at the ex piration of his term. As a consequence, legis lative positions in Colorado are subject to a de cided bull movement x Scientific inquiry develops the fact that the most hopeful method of getting rid of tho mosquito is to multiply the dragon fly or "devil's darning needle," as he used to bo called in the vernacular. But while we are raising dragon flies the more obnoxious insect will continue to multiply and wax fat on our blood. The mosquito is too muoh for science as well as for tbe human race. A Chicago paper turns up its nose at New York because that city wants to have a Rotten Row like London. Chicago enterprise has fully supplied the Western city in that line with the row over the World's Fair site. Loed Salisbury's declaration that the political situation in Europe was never more pacific, and that the Powers were grow ingly inclined to compromise, Is a cheerful and optimistic view; but it omitted to enlarge upon tbe fact that all the Powers are keeping up the policy of bankrupting themselves to provide Immense armies to keep the peace withal. Thebe is comfort in the belief that the backbones of the heated term and of the ice comer are completely fractured. "Thebe was a time," says the New York Herald gloomily, "when a resolution to remove the body of General Grant from New York would not have passed the Senate without a' protest." There also was a time when people thought that New York would keep the pledge to build a fitting monument over General Grant's remains. But that time Is past PEOPLE H? GENERAL. TntOTHY Haeeington is coming to Amer ica to assist in reorganizing the Irish League. M. Thahados has been appointed Grecian Minister of War and M. Kanakaris Minister of Education and Religion. Miss Constance Lodge, daughter of Con gressman Lodge, will be one of the buds of Boston society the coming season. THE merchants of Kansas City are making preparations for a three days' entertainment of a large number of Mexican tourists from Guadalajara and Jalisco. MBS. De. EMMA E. CHASE, of St. Louis, has been elected a full member of the American Dental Association, tbe first lady on whom the honor has been conferred. Emma Abbott sailed for New York yester day on tbe Normandie, with a wardrobe of 60 magnificent costumes made by Worth and Felix, which cost over $6,000. MISS BLANCHE WILLIS HOTVABD. the American novelist, was recently married to Dr. Teufel, of Stuttgart, one of the most emi nent practitioners of Germany. Mrs.Leland Stanford recently paid $35 for SO menu cards for one of her swell dinners. The map of tho United States was stamped In silver on the back of tho cards. Henbt George, who has recently returned from Australia, will address the Financial Re form Club at Liverpool, August 22, and sail Im mediately afterward for lew York. LIEUTENANT MANLIO GARIBALDI, the youngest son of tbe great liberator. Is soon to he married to Miss Mantegazza, daughter of tbe celebrated author of that name. Ex-Pbesident Cleveland has purchased tbe large Tudor estate at Tndor Haven, on Buzzard's Bay. The sum has, been agreed upon, a forfeit has been paid, and tbe neces sary papers are being made ont. Pbincx George's full name Is George Frederick Ernest Albert. Ho is the second son ol the Prince and Princess of Wales, and is just 26 years old., He resembles his father in looks and manners. a i iifliTTnaniriiiiriiTira wiTrtiiiijgirrmir ' i .. iimmmh ' ' ui i i m OUR SHORT STORIES. HE DIDN'T BOTHER THEM. Tben Fowler was a good old Kansas farmer whose particular hobby was to bring up his boys right He had two of them. Jerry was the brightest, but not as old as his brother, and as precedence of birth rules on a farm as well as in royalty, the old man's son Thomas was rather tbe favorite. The old gentleman dally lectured his sons on the cardinal evils of tbe world, mainly bearing on temperance as the best of all principles. The boys listened always and promised to heed their old father's advice throughout their lives. At length the younger boy said he must go to tbo city. There was sorrow in the old man's house. He was troubled and bis good old wife was: troubled. It seemed best that the boy should go out into the world, but be was too young. It was finally agreed, however, that be should go, and that the older boy should go with him. The two youths set out with the best wishes of tbe neighbors, and fairly over whelmed with fatherly and motherly advice. "Be careful, boys," sobbed the old man, "don't drink and don't hoss race ef ye don't want to break your daddy's and mammy's hearts." Tbe boys promised. They went to the city, fl ourished, made money and wrote back to the old home tbat they were too busy to leave on a visit but urged their father to come and see them. The old man finally concluded to go, and one crisp December morning he reached the city. He was not very warmly clad, and as he scurried along he wondered if it would be wrong for him to take a small finger of whisky. He decided that he needed it he was old and could not contract the drink habit he argued to himself. He went in through one of the doors of the great gilded palaces and stepped up to the bar. Just as the old man called for his drink the barkeeper saw him start "What's the matter, old man!" called the mixer of drinks. ' "Would ye mind tellin' me whar the bosses isT" he gasped, holding the small glass trem blingly in his fingers.. "Ob, they's out at the barn looking at their hoss os." Tho old man turned away. He dropped 10 cents on tbo oar and left his whisky untonched. "I'm goin' home," he muttered, "this is no place fer the ol' man. I'll go back to tho ol' woman, an' tell her that our boys is succeeding but but thet is all I kin tell her." He reached the door, then, turning around, he looked again at a big sign on the bar. It read: TOM AND JEKBY. "Ef I hadn't seen it with my own eyes." mur mured the old man, as be turned back toward the depot "I'd never believed It. But I'll not bother the boys I'll not bother 'em." A DEAD FAILURE. Lf emmler's death was the subject in dispute. They debated It hotly, all three of them, as they walked from Smlthfleld to Wood street There was nothing exclusive about their con tentionthe passersby were welcome to hear all that was said. Two of them appeared to be trying to convince the third. Finally the latter broke away from his companions. "You fellows can't convince me that the exe cution wasn't a failure," he said. "How can you say that Kemmler's dead, isn't her' "Just so a dead failure!" OLE BOSSIE COW. po ole bossie cow's down in de marsh, Down in, da marsh where de col' win's are blowin'j Eb'ry now an' den when de staum dies away Seems if 1 hyard ole bossie cow a lowin'. So out by de cabin do I Stan' on de sweep, An' listen In de win an' dampnln' weddah, An't pears datl hear ole bossie cow agin, An' I low dat she say; "Come down in de meddab." Den down froo de marsh land trampln along, Down froo de gloom an de night rain a f allln', Pickin' my way lroo de whlsperin' reeds, Co-boss, co-boss, co-boss, a callln'. Den all ob a sudden I come to a stop. An' dar was ole bossie cow so gentle and so kyind. An' I coax up ole brindle, an' I lead her by de ho'n; A wee little bossie cow comes follerin' on behin'. A wee little bossie comes follerin' on behin'. THE WRONG GEORGE. A BOOT 1:10 on Sunday morning a couple of newspaper men one of them from Phila delphiawalked up to the desk at the Hotel Anderson and examined the register with pro digious eagerness "There he Is," said the urbane Pittsburger pointing to the last name on the register, and both journalists at once put their names on a piece of pasteboard and asked the clerk to send it up to the room occupied by the man they sought. Tbe clerk smiled in a quiet way, all to himself, and gave the card to tho bell boy. Then the Fhlladelphian indnlged In a forecast of the f un they would have with the gentleman who had retired for the night. His nrbane and portly colleage of Pittsburg chuckled likewise. Tbe bell boy came back in a few minutes. A large smile adorned bis face. "Tbe gem'man says he aint the man you'se lookin' for.1" The urbane Pittsburger looked at the Phila delphia journalist and a frown contracted their brows simultaneously. Then they looked at the register again. There was the signa ture: George L Pearson, New Castle. There was a slight cessation of hostilities a truce as it were for the burial of the dead. Then the man who had been urbane said sav agely: "Blank itl George Pearson comes from Mercer, of courser' Governor Beaver's private secretary, Mr. George Pearson, ought to apologize to a news paperman in Pittsburg and another in Phila delphia, for having a cousin who signs himself George L. IT WAS HIS WAY OF ADVERTISING. tT beg pardon for Intruding upon your time," said the polite, smiling man with the small valise in his hand. "A peddler is a nui sance. I know it as well as anybody. Bnt there are various kinds of peddlers, and all of us must live. It isn't our fault that we are here. Those of ns that earn our living honestly have to share the odium that belongs to tbe calling. I'm npt complaining of this, gentlemen. It is a part of the curse tbat came in the original package to Adam. If there is any of you that has a spot of grease on his coat, vest or pant trousers," he added, opening his valise and taking out a small cake of soap and a sponge. 'I shall be happy to remove it without charging a cent and without asking anybody lo buy my soap. Its my way of advertising. My dear sir. alloy me. There is a little spot on your vest." He rubbed the spot with the pfeco of soap, deftly applied the sponge, made a few passes over the cloth with a piece of cotton sheeting, and said: "There sir, that spot is gone. You will never see it again. And probably you will never see mb either, as I travel but once through a com munity. My goods will be found at tho stores. 1 take it for granted nobody wishes to buy a cake of my soap. I wish you good morning, gentlemen." After the polite, smiling man had gone away tbe gentleman, whose garments had been oper ated upon, had occasion to consult his watch. It wasn't there. It had disappeared with the spot DIGNIFIED SILENCE DIDN'T WORK. '"The prisoner had entered a plea of not guilty, but neither he nor his attorney had offered anything in bis defense. When the jury brought in a verdict of guilty the court ordered the prisoner to stand up, saying: Prisoner, have you anything to say before sentence is pronounced !" Tbo prisoner drew himself up to his full height, looked haughtily at the Judge and. compressed his lips tightly. "As you have nothing to say," His Honor proceeded, "and as there are no mitigating cir cumstances, I shall impose the heaviest sen tence tbe law allows. The sentence of the court is tbat you pay a fine of 6 cents and costs and undergo an imprisonment in the Western Penitentiary for a term of 20 years." The prisoner's face was a picture of conflict ing emotions as he was led from tho dock. He recovered sufficiently by the time his counsel' approached bim to say: "Blank blank you 'dignified silence' played hades, didn't ltt" 1 he Point of View. (' From the Kansas City Star. . This is the difference: Secretary laine is an international man; President Halrison is an Indianapolis man. ' V ; AHOvTHGHOTOTAIN, Irresistibly Forcing lis Way Across Ilia Columbia Rlver rrom the Astorian.J A'traveling mountain is foundat the cascades of tbe Columbia. It is a triple peaked mass of dark brown basalt fix or eight miles In length where it fronts the river and rises to a height of almost 2,000 feet above the water. That it is in motion is the last thought that would be likely to suggest itself to the mind of any one passing it; yet It is a well-established fact that this entire mountain is moving slowly but steadily down the river as if i t had a deliberate purpose some time in the future to dam the Columbia and form a great lake from tbe cas cades to the Dalles. The Indian traditions indicate Immense movements of the mountains hereabouts long before wblto men came to Oregon, and the early settlers Immigrants, many of them, from New England gave the above described moun tainous ridge the name of "traveling moun tain," or "sliding mountain." In its forward and downward movement the forests along the base of the ridge have become submerged Id the river. Large tree stubs can be seen stand ing deen in tho water on this snore. The rail way engineers and the brakemen find that the line of the railroad which skirts the foot of the mountain is being continually forced out of place. At certain points the railroad and rails have been pushed eight or ten feet out of line in the course of a few years. Geologists attributed this strange phenomenon to the fact that the basalt, which constitutes the bulk of the moun taln.'rests on a substratum of conglomerate, or of soft sandstone, which the deep, swift cur rent of the mighty river Is constantly wearing away, or that this softer snb-rock is of Itself yielding, at great depths, to the enormous weight of the harder material above. STATE POLITICAL NOTES. The Cumberland county Prohibitionists have placed a ticket in the field. Lancaster Prohibitionists have nominated Joseph Brosius, of Salisbury, for Congress. Yore county Democrats have nominated John W. Bittinger for the vacant Associate judgeship. State Chairman Kebr will accompany Candidate Pattison on his travels through the northern counties. Congressman Retbubn Is suffering from rheumatism, and has been ordered to leave Washington for a rest Wayne MaoVeagh has been mentioned as a candidate for Congress in the Sixth district against John B. Robinson. Congressman Buckalew has returned to Columbia county to try to straighten out the kickers who want to retire him to private life. Judge Harry White, of Indiana county, Is opposed to the Australian ballot system, but that will not necessarily prevent its adoption In Pennsylvania. Lebanon Republicans say there'll be music in the air in November if Congressman Rife shall beat their candidate (Woomer) for the nomination this time. Ex-State Senator Coxe, of Wilkesbarre, Is out in a card declining a Congressional nomi nation, but says he will take his place in the ranks and work for the entire State ticket WORKING AMONG THE MINERS. Encouraging Reports Rend at the W. C. T. U. Meeting Yesterday. The regular monthly meeting of the W. C, T. U. was largely attended, at the Third TJ. P. Church yesterday afternoon. Miss Mattie A. McConnell presided. Previous to tbe business meeting a half hour was given to devotional exercises. The report of the treasurer showed a balance of 297 01 on hand. The members were urged to call npon the primary teachers of tbe public schools, who have been accorded the privilege by the Central Board of Educa tion, to select reading books as they choose. The members were instructed to use their most earnest endeavors to lndnce the teachers to use No. 1 of the Union Series, which contains tem perance lessons. Mrs. R. H. Jones read a paper on work among miners. The work in this line is quite new.but thus far Mrs. Jones states it is very en couraging. The lady regretted that the labor papers which reach the miners are filled with liquor advertisements. Mrs. Spencer spoke feelingly of the death of Mrs. Dr. Sterrett, who was a member of the W. C. T. U. Mrs. Gibson congratulated tbe union on its work, and stated they had no rea son to feel discouraged, as the results were more successful than In some Western eities, where the saloons and stores are running on Sunday. The meeting adjourned with prayer. CURRENT TIMELY TOPICS. It did not require a microscope to see Presi dent Harrison In Boston this week. If the bridges hold out the crop of fools will be greatly diminished before the year la out Pinkerton'S bloodhounds are again on the trail. They haTen't had much to do since they left the Adrian mines In Western Pennsylvania. The Franklin man who unearthed a den of rattlesnakes by the blowing up of an empty glycerine can Is to be congratulated. He not onlr killed many of the varmints, bnt In all likelihood he saved the lives of innocent boys who generally find the empty cans. People who Imagine themselves too poor to attend the Stanley lectnres this fall will be glad to know that they can read them In the next morn ing's paper for 3 cents. There is no apparent consuming desire on the part of a convention to vindicate a Congress man after sitting lonr days without renominating him. Jndge Wlckbam, of Ohio, may therefore consider himself out of the race. MANY things are uncertain in this world, hut one of the certainties Is that the Exposition in this city will come and go before the great World's Exposition In Chicago will be inaugurated. Kemmler will be done up in wax in the dime museums of tbe conntry. The unfortunate man should have provided against this before he de parted hence. Brother Cumhings, of tbe New York Sun, is canslng Speaker Heed and other Bepubllo ans a good deal of anxiety of late. And, come to think of it, he 13 not the first newspaper man to make the average Congressman perspire and wish himself In a more congenial clime. The hot weather comes and the hot weather goes, bnt Congress goes on forever. Bnt what are you going to do about It? A WITCH'S SPELL. Tell me, witches, tell me true now to win a spell from yon, Tint will charm a maiden fair Who Is like a sprite of air. Ariel and Caliban, Aid me, aid me, if you can That I may secure an elf As elusive as herself. Everywhere her face appears Wreathed with smiles bedewed with tears Luring me from day to day In an Ignis fatuus way. Ariel and Caliban! Was there ever mortal man So perplexed as 1, who fain Would this errant one detain! Even through my dreams she breaks, And most dire confusion makes, And when I awake, anon, Mischief tale it I she 13 gone! Caliban and Ariel, Weave, I pray, some magic spell That will fix the form and face 1 would clasp in Lore's embrace. When I smile, she's sure to pout; When I frown, her laugh rings out; When I'm near her, off sbe flies With a challenge in her eyes. Yet these very tricksy ways Win for berunstlnted praise. And were she less coy, 'tis true, I should not the maid pursue. Though the victim of her spell, I'll not struggle or rebel, Forthisjoy my heart retains Missing her-I hug my claims. Ariel and Caliban, Vain for ye to plot and plsn To entrap the saucy elf. For sbe Is a witch herself. Josephine Pollard, in Jftw Xork Ledger. DEATHS OF A DAY. Nicholas Lunlng. SAN FEANCISCO. CAL., August It Nicholas Lunlng, a well-known capitalist, died suddenly, i.f nifrht nf heart disease. He had been a con. spicuoua figure In ban Francisco bnslness circles since 184U. His wealth was estimated at between tl5.000,O00andf.IAT0.X)0. James t. Morrow. James S. Morrow died at Braddock at 9 o'clock yesterday morning. He was a well known and Sromlnent citizen there. For .some time he has cpn IhnTirnnrictnr of the White HOUSe BoUl Of 'Braddock.' ' ,?V w-e WEALTH AND HAPPINESS. DR. BUCKLEY ON THE QUESTION OF SO CIAL REFORMS. 6 Inequality of Worldly Glfia Responsible for Bloat of tbe Existing Discontent Relig ion the Only Remedial Acent Colonel Conwell on the Humble Heroes of Ills lory. rer-EciAL teleqeah to tbx DISPATCH. 1 Take Chautauqua, August 12. It is now that Chautauqua's programme is most complete, the lecturers the most talented, the concerts the most brilliant, and crowds the most abundant. Three men, all of a wide. It not a national reputation, occupied the plat form to-day and gave three lectures, any one of which was sufficient in Itself for a single pro gramme. Dr. J. M. Buckley, of New York, Colonel Russell H. Conwell,of Philadelphia, and Dr.Richard T.Ely were all at their bestand tbe people were entertained with royal intel lectual productions. The morning lecture was given by Dr. Buckley on "Christianity and So cialism." The Doctor thought that, through tbe religion of Jesus Christ alone, conld the classes be leveled and social reform brought about, "Subjects differ according to their se riousness," he said. "I confess tbat this Is a difficult snbject Certainly pure Christianity sbouldgrasp this questionof socialism. Suppose a man and his wife were thrown upon an unin habited island for an indefinite length of time; such words as capital and labor would never occur to them curicg their whole lives. But it would to their descendants, when they came to the different stages of intelligence. "Go where you will, you will find different classes representing the Inequalities of the human race. Our own country has been mar volously happy in the small number of our poor. By poor I mean those who if tbeywere ill for a month, a week, a day would be de pendent Our population are gathering in the cities, and in tbe next hundred years the num ber of these poor will relatively increase. Now they use the same language, 'he Is well-to-do.' about the man who Is work 5,000.000 as of him who was worth $100,000 half a century ago.Happy it is indeed that men in this country can be in fluential without the possession of wealth. The Immensely rich must have the counsel of the Intellectual poor. The Government makes many distinctions, and so do the army and navy. If you think your money amounts to anything go to an army post where military men most do congregate, and you will find that you are outranked in society by a corporaL" Wealth Bring Discontent. m'J'here are men in tbe House of Commons of England who have far greater power than Queen Victoria. What is the effect of all these inequalities? Intense hatred and feeling. Every inch of land in the country, except that which may be owned by the Government, is in herited. So you see those infants who are born poor come Into the world handicapped. As a result there is dissatisfaction. To-day the threatenlnc figure before Germany is not Rus sia, Is not England. It Is the sceptre of social ism. We are now in tbe condition that an Eastern despot said the people of the city of London were if a man resists a policeman he must be killed. This is true in our cities and It is right. The workingman makes many com plaints which are grossly exaggerated. Tho unskilled laborers are suffering In tbe city, bnt the skilled laborers have money in the sayings banks, can lay up money for great strikes and can organize great parades. "You find the counterpart of nearly every class of society now existing spoken of in the Bible. The question of capital and labor 13 many times discussed in God's book with tre mendous force. How did Christ grapple this questionf In the first place be said: "Seek the kingdom of God.' His doctrine was that you shall find support here on earth. Christ set forth no such theory as Count Tolstoi or Henry George. We find a great many people who are going to reconstruct society by writing lectures about Its evils. Many do not succeed, because they do not obey tbe laws of Jesus Christ Above all tbe aristocracies there is tbe aristocracy of Jesus Christ If you are a serv ant or a rich man, work honestly, for you are to get your greatest reward in heaven. The athe istic Socialists propose to destroy Christianity. Let them study and tbey will find that Christ is the best friend of tbe laboring man. These fine schemes, like 'Looking Backward.' make a mistake. Tbey conld be run by angels, but they have no human nature in them." nkWV' A Text to Suit. r)E. Bucexey told the story of a band of Millentea in Western New York, who formed a oommnnlty to carry out their social belief. The trouble was that all of them were a poor class of people. Finally they coaxed one man of great wealth to favor their ideas, and they were happy at the prospect of bis money for their benefit Ho told them be would study the Scriptures, andif be could find anything in them stating the truth of tho doc trine they set forth, no would do as they wished, donate alt his riches to their common good. When tbe day came he said he had found a passage, and they were joyful at tbe prospect of bis conversion until he astohithed them with the following quotation: 'You occupy until I come.' "I know of no better illustration of the bands of equality in which the religion of Jesus Christ shall bind all mankind than the remark of tbe Duke of Wellington when at tbe com munion table, who, greater than tbe Bishop who preached to him, said: 'Remember we are all equal here.' " Tbe Dlessago of the Spirit. T7d'ward Bellamy's popular theme in "Looking Backward" has been twisted and copied in many forms, and, under the title of "Looking Downward." Colonel Russell H. Conwell has made an original and taking lec ture, the more pleasing because his subject did not suggest his line of thought "I am not well this afternoon, and were It not for the inspira tion of this audience, I could not speak; but I often find a sympathetic audience good medi cine. There are audiences before which Beecber conld be eloquent. Mr. Longfellow once desired to know an Indian tradition which existed in Minnesota which appealed to tbe heart and mind of the great poet. An old In dian chief who had won bis way by his courage and ability to tbe honors of chieftainship, ijas the subject of tbe tradition. He was of great intellectual vigor and superior to those around him. He longed for a greater world than this to go to tbe great spirit world where such grand and divine spirits existed. He climbed up to the top of the highest mountain that he might reach it. "For long months and years he slept on the ground and lived noon this mountain top until he became old and his hair turned gray. One night be was sleeping when something began tuirsrinc: at his beard, he heard a voice and soon found that the spirits of the trees were about him, for the Indians believed each tree had a spirit. The pine tree spirit said to him, 'Come to-morrow night to the base of ySur great tree and 1 will have a message for you.' The next evening ho slept under the pine tree, but he was disappointed for no message came. Look ing up into the branchesof the tree he cned out: 'Oh, great tree, tell me why it is that thou"with thy high branches, thy lofty boughs can associate with tbe clouds and be above all on earth? Then came the answer. 'Ilbegln by going and looking downward. Every branch has its counterpart In the roots under tho ground which are just as long and as great.' " Tbo Hamblo Heroes. it'TUAl is the keynote of my whole thought Look downward and there you will find the hero. Where do you find your heroes to day? Look downward, and you will find tbem. Sam Houston, who became President, yes. Em peror of Texas, was one of the heroes to whom we can look downward. Santa Anna received the simple, roughly dressed Texan at a meet ing of war. In all tho splendor of a Mexican Count dressed in the most elcgint of military splendor. In two weeks they bad exchanged camps or rather Houston bad both. Look downward for tho hero. See ColumbU3 at tbo Court of Isabella, laughed at by tho wise men in royal dress. The name of Columbus is writ ten on the clouds, and we would not know of thewlsedoctorsbutforan accident. The first we ever beard of Dr. Brown-Sequard, now fa mous, was In tho streets playing and studying the little insects commonly called skippers, to satisfy his scientific turn of mind, Honry Ward Beecher. stumbling through his first schoolboy piece, was little thought of as tbe coming greatest pulpit orator of the world. We bad to look downward to find him. We must look downward to find the great men of the future. It is true everywhere, it is true in literature. Did you look at tbat little girl run ning around among the servants in a Boston intelliaence office? Look down and ask her her name, and you will find it is Louise Alcdtt, the future great writer. "What Is the value of this Cbantanqua idea? It goes ipto every home and tars: You can be great you can be truo if you wish. Tbat is tbe grandeur of this movement that unites all tbe churches together. Go down in the St Louis streets and speak to tbe man who is selling wood. The man with slouch bat and overalls, and bis name Is Ulysses B. Grant. Don't look up for the mountains of gold, look down at tbe common things. Tbe wise men of tbe Spanish court threw tbe potato aside. They were look ing' for gold. Now tbe money received from tbe production of the potato exceeds tbat re ceived from all tbe gold of Australia. Look at the small things. Spnrgeon pays as much at tention to the food tbat he eats as tbe sermon he preaches. Down below us lies more than Is aboyo us down until tbe mind Is lost in the beautiful possibilities ot scientific research." ' Lnkralde Notes nnil Gossip. t)r. Richard T.Ely continued his lectures " Jn the Hall of Philosophy on "Chnrch and State,-" They are admirable productions. 3j .. ) - ' zii fc". tLm. & t .... .fcfftawrgt. a .. i-.-p s2feei. - i-si1sgK This afternoon he reviewed the history of the Church of England as connected with Its insti tutions of state. Religion, be said, bears the same relation to the-church that society bears to tbe state; the little country school the same relation to state that the parish church bears to pnbllo morality. William H. Sherwood gave th regular Tues day piano recital at tbe Temple; it was well attended, and to say that Mr. Sherwood-played well is unnecessary. Mr. A. A. Stage. "The Praying Pitcher." led the Young People's Chrl-tlan Endeavor Society In tbe ball this evening. He did not tnre them any curves or shoots, but fired the gospel straight at them with Intensity and earnestness, if not elo quence. This evening a reception was given In thepar lhrsof tbe Hotel Atbenaenm totbe Collezo of Liberal Arts. All the classic Knights, Biblical gallants and learned gentlemen whs have spent the summer in study spent an hour of most cul tured conversation. Dr. Harper was tbe hero of the evening. This has been tbe greatest year yet for the college, some 600 students being reg istered. "Ici on parle Francaise" was the sub ject of an interesting stereptlcon lecture given this evening by Mr. Robarts Harper. The views were especially beautiful, though the voice of tbe speaker hardly reached all parts of the am phitheater. 0UK MAIL POUCH. Tbo Dartmoor Prisoners To the Editor of The Dispatch: Will you inform your readers under what circumstances the prisoners of war were shot in cold blood as mentioned in the obituary sketch of John Boyle O'Reilly in Monday's .dispatch. There Is no relation to this effect In any published history. B, C. Pittsburg, August 12. "Appleton's Cyclopedia of American Biog raphy," says of O'Reilly: "While in Dart moor, aided by other Irish prisoners, he col lected and buried the scattered bones of tbe French and American prisoners of war who were shot in 1814." See also "American En cyclopedia," article "Dartmoor." which says: "Dartmoor is chiefly noted as the site of the prison built in 1803 at a cost of 127, 000, for the custody of French prison ers of war. At one time it contained 10.000 inmates. On tbe breaking out of hos tilities with the United States in 1812, 2,500 impressed sailors, claiming to be American citizens, and refusing to serve in the British army against their country, were imprisoned in Dartmoor, where most of them were kept till the end of the war. Accounts of the harsh ness of their treatment reached the United States and created much feeling. This was especially tbe case on an occasion when the guard fired upon tbe prisoners. Explanations, however, have shown that the occurrence was the result of a mistake." A Misleading Police Item. To the Editor ol The Dispatch: The following appeared in this morning's Dispatch: Yesterday 119 was stolen from William Ash land, a West End shoemaker, and, as his son has disappeared, It is supposed ho took the money. The old man Is very poor and had laid by tbe money bit by bit to pay his taxes. He la heart broken over his loss. Above is not true, Tbat I was robbed of the money is true, but it did not concern me any more than it would ordinarily any other person. 1 am not very poor. My income is amply suffi cient to provide my family with all necessary comforts, and in addition have money in bans: to discount my taxes every year without saving bit by bit. Nor have I at any time accused my son of the theft, nor do I think he was con cerned in it at all. By giving space to this cor rection you will do justice to the undersigned. Robert asht.tn. West End, August 12. A Correction, To the Editor of Tbe Dispatch : In the account this morning of the finding of young Joseph,J3robeck, of Rochester. Pa., fatally wounded in a box car at Beaver Falls, it was erroneously said that he was accompanied to Chicago, some ten days ago, by a son of Judge Wlckham, of Beaver. The young gen tleman referred to, as Brobeck's companion, lives in Rochester, and is not a son of tbe Jndge. as stated. W. Beaver Falls, August 12. Mr. Wonnmnker'i Order. To the Editor of The Dispatch. Kindly inform me tbe name of the postmas ter who refused "The Kreutzer Sonata," and what has been done about it up to date. Pittsburg, August 12. N. S. lOur understanding of the matter Is that the order was issued by the Fostmanter General at tbe instance of an agent ot Anthony Com stock's society. How to Tan Groundhog Hides. To the Editor of The Dispatch: To tan a groundhog skin use equal parts of salt and pulverized alum. Scrape the fat off and mb the mixture well in. X Pittsburg, August 12. STATE PRESS OPINIONS. Chester News: Wiggins isn't going to be caught this time. He makes tho prediction that the end of the world will not come for sev eral billions of years. For the first time we have a little faith in his prognostications. Oil City Mlizzard: The apple crop is a de cided failure in this section. Were all the apples grown in Oil City this season to be eaten by a single boy, they would not be sufficient to create a demand for a dose of paregoric MEADVTLLE Gazette: Typhoid fever at Franklin is raging in the Pittsburg papers, but the doctors of the nursery are idle, the undertaker puts in his time pitching quoits, and tbe grave digger's pick and shovel are covered with rust. Reading Times: The Road Commission has reached the point of naming a sub-committee to draft a bill for submission to the Legislature next winter. It is to be hoped that the meas ure agreed upon may be an Improvement upon anything previously evolved in this direction. Chajibersburq Repository: It is highly Important for each Republican to see tbat he Is assessed before September i. Do not wait for the committeeman or your neighbor to do itfor you, but do it yourself. There are thousands of votes lost in this State by persons neglecting to attend to this Important business. Wilkesbarre Record: The idea of organ izing an association for the purpose of holding an annual industrial fair in Wilsesbarre, com bined with an agricultural and fine stock ex hibit, is being talked of In earnest. Several live business men have expressed the opinion that such an enterprise would be a money-making affair for tbe stockholders, as well as a big thing for tbe city. Lancaster New Era: None of the older States have done better In the matter of in creasing their populations during the past dec ado than Pennsylvania. Our gain is rather more than 1.000,000, a gain of about 25 per cent. One of tbe curiosities of our census Is tho fact that the State has actually grown more rapidly than her largest city, Philadelphia. Perhaps no other Stata,will snow such a record. And Pennsylvania is not "grown out" yet by any means I ' ALL THROUGH THE STATE. IT is reported on good authority tbat a plant for the manufacture of Bessemer steel will shortly be erected at Bowmansdale,Cumberlacd county. Lightning struck the barn of Mrs. Hannah Gruver in Hanover township, Lehigh county, and totally destroyed it with all the crops of this year. Loss 53,000. Le-vvis Emery. Jr., 'of Bradford, snes the city of Three Rivers, Mich., for $10 000 damages, alleging that his water power has been dam aged that much by reason of the water works. THEBoardofExamlnersforMinelnspectorof tho Third Inspection District have unanimously recommended the appointment of John M. Lewis, ot Pittston, who is at present a mine fnrpmftn for thn Pnn,.lmnn fnn.n-H E. E. ORircnriELD, of Mt. Pleasant, found no less than 37 deaa English sparrows lying un der a tree In front of his North Church street home. The birds had been drowned off their roost by tho heavy rain of the night before. AN immense brass pump chamber, weighing 6,000 pounds, has been cast by J. A. Touhlll's Riverside Foundry, Pittston, the largest brass casting ever turned out In the State. Ithas been erroneously stated tbat it was cast in this city. CHARLES STEIOER, formerly editor of tbe OllCityDerrfcA:, is now one of tbe permanent fixtures of the Chicago Herald. Mr. Steiger is a versatile writejr, well known in this city, and s sure to make his mark in the Western metropolis . J A FAMILY with triplets, all girls, and each as like tbe other as three peas in a pod, attracted mnch attention, on the Lehigh Valley Railroad train Monday at Philadelphia. Tho party, con sisting of father, mother and three babies, were, en route to the seashore and balled from the coal region. A -- I' -QMtagoPott. A CUEIODS C0NDEHSATI0NS. An auction s-.le of coffins took plac last week in Bartow. Fla. One room in the "Westingbouse Cottage at Lenox cost S50.0C0 to decorate and furnish. A Harlem bride received among her wedding presents' a receipted gas bill of J17 from her father. A black and white crow was recently captured at Beverly, and will be mounted and exhibited at tbe Salem museum. Many settlers in the Big Bend, Wash., country have been driven away by the ravages of squirrels that swarm in countless numbers in that region. F. A. Dewey, of Cambridge, Mich., is undoubtedly tbe oldest stage driver and mail contractor in the State. He is 80, and drove a stage out of Detroit 60 years ago. The most valuable metal in the world is said to bo gallium, which is worth 3,250 an ounce. Calcium brings 51,800 a pound and cerium 31,920 per pound. Gold is worth 8240 a pound. Seven hundred and fifty dollars is the price of the suite of rooms on the City of New Yors occupied by Mrs. Robert T. Lincoln and two daughters on their homeward journey from Europe. Walter Brothers, of Temescal, Cal., have taken from a single hive this season 150 pounds or honey, and they expect to take 80 pounds more from it before the season is over, making 230 in all. Trade marks were known in ancient Babylon; China had them as early as 1000 B. C; they were authorized in England in '1300; Gut tenbnrg. tbe Inventor of printing, is said to nave had a lawsuit over his trade mark. One of the largest forests in the world stands on Ice. It is situated between Ural and the Okhotsk Sea. A well was recently dug in this region, when it was found that at a depth of 116 metres the ground was still frozen. Peter B. Sweeney is trying to get New York to undertake improvements along the banks of tbe Hudson similar to those in Lon don beside tbe Thames. He wants a grand driveway extending several miles to be created. A tree in Nashville caught fire from an electric wire. One limb was burned entirely off. A policeman threw water on the burning limb with a hose, and when tbe water struck the fire be experienced a sevjre electric shock. Female slaves are still given to the Sultan in old-time pomp. An exquisitely beautiful girl of 16. a Georgian, that his aunt sent to him, was taken to tbe Yidlz Kiosk In a gilt coach escorted by a troop of gigantic eunuchs. The lS-year-old son of John Mimbs, of Dublin, Ga., died a day or two ago. Four years ago be swallowed a brass thimble off the end of an umbrel'a, which lodged in his throat and there remained until his death. It is said tbat the poison from the brass caused bis death. Rather a unique invitation to a merry makingwas that Issued by the Bristol County Fruit Growers' Association, to a clambake to be held at DIghton, Mass., July 3L Tbe invita tion was printed on a postal card, of which it occupied but one-half. Tbe other half con tained the business card ot a funeral director. 5Vhile walking through a street of Dan bury, Conn.. Miss Kitty Lincard noticed herpet poodle gazing intently into some bushes and vainly attempted to attract his attention. Ap proaching nearer she discovered tbat a black snake five feet long had charmed tbe dog. 6b e killed tbe snake with a stone as large as she could lift. The tract distributer who handed a tract on the sin of dancing to a soldier who had lost both legs has a rival. To a frnit peddler who la without bands a New Haven distributer yester ady gave a tract bearing warnings against card playing. The tract rested on the basket bang ing from tbe vender's neck and. by attracting attention, materially increased bis sales. ..Veto Haven Palladium. This year the French and Italian artil lery maneuvers took place near tbe boundary of the two countries, in Savoy. The officers met and fraternized, but, as neither had leave to depart from his country, they desigded a din ner at which tho long table stood one-half In Italy, one-half in France, and a red cord which run across the middle designated the division. Tbey had a lolly time, each in his own country, and a good dinner. A Baldwin county, Fla., boy was swim ming In the rivera fewdays ago. Be was seized by an itching pain, which exhausted him im mediately, and had it not been for his play mates present he would have drowned. After coming out of the water his arms and body commenced to swell until the boy presented au "inhuman" appearance. Physicians were sum moned, who were at loss to know the cause of the boy's peculiar condition, but supposed he in some way came in contact with something poisonous. The sufferer continued to grow worse until death relieved him of his pains, which were very severe. Chief of Police Crowley, ot San Fran cisco, who has been at the head of the polica department for 18 years, has filed a strong In dictment against the Chinese of tbat city. He says tbe Chinese there commit more crimes against tbe law, In proportion to their number, tban anv race or community, and the detec tion of the perpetrators of such crimes Is more difficult tban tbe detection of criminals of any other class, because Chinamen refuse to dis close the identity" of their criminals. They have no regard for tbe obligations of an oath and are becoming more vicious and immoral year by year. Tbe chief favors the removal of the Chinese quarter. The Common Pleas Court for Merce? county, O., has an enthusiastic fisherman for one of its judges. At the May term there were extravagant stories afloatabout an unusual run of catfish in tbe mouth of the Coldwater ditch, and so thoroughly had these stories enthused tbe court that on a certain day at 12 o'clock M. tbe judge said: "Mr. Sheriff, adjourn this court until 9 o'clock to-morrow morning, while the Court goes a-flshlng." Thereupon tbe judgo and fonr others started in a farmer's team for tbe locality named, wbere tbey found such an immense number of catfish tbat a barrel was quickly filled with tbem, the judge leaping Into the stream with a basket and catching them by the score in tbat way. Like the horses of Vienna and tbe cats of New Zealand, says a foreign writer, the monkeys of Southern India are numbered amone the victims of influenza. A correspond ent at Kurnul gives a harrowing account of how the epidemic has spread among the monkeys of the district Tbe animals were quite conspicuous one day by their absence, so that everything left out to dry on terraces was undisturbed quite an unusual experience. Next morning they were seen in groups bera and there, some couchlnc terribly, otbers reel ing like drunken men, and then, later on, "the unpleasant stillness tbat reigned under.the tress which afforded them shelter, was often disturbed by tbe crash of a heavy monkey coming precipitately down to the ground to die." BREAKFAST TABLE LAUGHS. Judge This gentleman can identify the watch lecause his Initials are scratched on the ln side of the case. Prisoner No, he can't; I scratched them off. Clothier and Furnisher. Mr. Gotham Now, Miss Laker, how do you stand on this qnestlon Miss Laker (of Chicago, Interrupting) I think, Mr. Gotham, yon might avoid alluding, eren dis tantly, to my feet, lenowine's Xevis. Briggs There was another addition -to Watt's family to-day. Braggs Lemme see. Is that the second or third? Briggs Judging from the cigars he basbeen passing around it must be about the ninth Tern Haute Express. Iceman (at front door) "Icei" Ten ounce chunk rattles over stone walk. First tramp to pal)-"Hey, Bill, here's our chance. We are saved at last." Second tramp-"How so?" First tramp "You biff him on de Jaw, and I'll seize de Jewel an' runl" Detroit Free Press. First mosquito Why did you bite that fellow so wickedly a moment ago? " Second mosquito He just sprung that chestnut about tbe bine blood in the mosquito's veins Hansen's Weekly. "Chicago claims to be a summer resort," said a New Xorker, derisively, to a visitor from that city. "Welt, "was the reply, hasn't a good deal of the summer resorted there this year?" Brooklvn Lite. "John," said Mrs. Dingley toherhus-. band after his return from a fishing trip, "you ought to spend an hour with our Ashmen and get some points about the different kinds of fish." "Er what for?" demanded John. "It looks a little inconsistent, that's all, to bring home mackerel when yon've been fishing In irsn water." Boston aerate.. " caossiso the kubicox. 'Twas in the mazes of the dance I trod upon her toe; She gave me one congealing glance. Aad hoarsely whispered "Ool" I prayed to her "Alas, alack!" Ob, leave me not forlorn I" She said "My love, you can't get Back, You've crossed the rnoy corn." ' OUtagt Pott. ikdt '.-f xkl
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers