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THE KTTSBTmG- DISPATCH. SUNDAY. APRIL 13, 1890.
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TErUMPHS OF INTENTION,
Persons who think, as some do, that the
era ol progress in inventions must come to a
stop may find reason to change their opin
ion from two ot the important inventions
reported in this issue of The DisrATCH.
The first is Edison's invention for record
ing and reproducing waves of sight just -as
the phonograph does with vibrations of
sound. The invention of the kintograph,
as the new instrument is called, is not yet
developed sufficiently to determine the full
ranje of its possibilities, but it can be pre
dicted that the instrument will play an im
portant part in the civilization of the next
generation. The possibility of reproducing
both the voice and the appearance of one,
who at a distance addresses you by this in
strument, would be a remarkable addition
to the great inventions of the age.
Not less interesting and hardly less im
portant is the local discovery reported to
day, by which one of our city pbyiscians
claims The ability to determine and an
alyze stains of blood on steel. In the de
tection and punishment of crime such a dis
covery will be of immense importance. Dr.
Mundorf is a scientific man who does not
usually claim more than he can demon
strate; nnd it is fair to believe that his
analysis of blood stains on steel is an ac
complished scientific fact
Two such inventions reported simulta
neously are enough to show that the flights of
invention are at once more daring and more
successful then ever.
A HEALTHY SHOWING.
The figures as to the transfers of proDerty
in Pittsburg and the recording ot mortgages,
compiled by the Real Estate Record of last
week, cive a gratifying indication of
legitimate activity. During the first three
months of the year there have been 3,093
conveyances of real estate with total
valuations of 9,863,000. The average of a
little over 3,000 apiece shows that this
business was nearly entirely for the building
of homes with a very slight element of
speculation. This is borne out by the
record of mortgages, which show that they
were largely to secure debts incurred for
improvements. The total o' the transfers, in
valuations, nearly equals that for the
last half of 1889, which was 11,827,000,
while the number of conveyances in
the former period was 5,710 against 3,093 in
the three months just closed. These figures
demonstrate the legitimacy and healthiness
of the real estate movement, beyond a
possibility of question.
NOT WITHOUT P0WZE.
The fact that a number of applicants for
wholesale license were refused by the Court
is raising a Btorm of objections. The de
cision of the Supreme Court last year
that the Judges had not discretionary
power to refuse license of this description
lias been relied upon by many applicants to
secure them wholesale licenses; and there is
no room for reasonoble doubt that a good
many of those who applied for both kinds
of license intended if they failed of getting
retail license to conduct business of a retail
description under cover of the wholesale
license.
The fact that the Court has not discretion
ary nower does not prove that it has no
powers at all. If every application carried
with it the right lo a license independent of
the jndgment of the Couit, the hearings
would be wasted time. The Court is to de
cide whether the applicant has established
the statutory qualifications, prominent
among which is that of good moral char
acter; and the discovery is now likely to be
impressed upon the public mind that the
man who makes a practice of breaking the
law by illicit sales of liquor fails egregiously
in establishing a good moral character.
"While it is not certain that the Court was
infallible, it is likely to be found that the
bulk of rejections of wholesale license were
well founded both in reason and in law.
A COLD TEA PABTY.
There is a proposal before Congress to ap
point a Congressional Commission to inves
tigate the liquor traffic It is one of those
proposals which Congress is prone to regard
favorably, for the simple reason that it
means a jnnket for the commissioners at
the public expense. These Congressional
commissions are becoming more numerous
every year. They afiord such a pleasant
and cheap way for Congressmen to get a
holiday tour through the country. The
very best of everything is not too
good for a committee of Congress.
They dine, wine, travel in palace cars,
smoke expensive cigars, receive the at
tention of local dignitaries with rare
condescension, and occasionally make casual
inquiries into the matter they are supposed
to be investigating. That is what the in
vestigation of the liquor traffic all through
the United States by a Congressional com
mission would mean. Congress is' putting
on economical airs; cutting down 'highly
needful naval appropriations, and looking as
virtuous as can be. Stop these ridiculous
and costly junkets, gentlemen, and the air
of virtue will become you better.
Besides, what is there in the liquor traffic
that Congressmen do not know? If the
commission be appointed it can inaugurate
an excellent practice by making its report
before it starts out to investigate. But
Congress will do best to stick to the investi
gation of cold tea in the Capitol.
A WAENING.
The story told by the lady whose marriage
to an alleged Italian Count only a short
time ago, furnishes one of the local sen
sations, by the multiplicity of its sensations,
completes the sensation by its revelation of
postnuptial experiences, with the reputed
nobility of Europe.
The object lesson thus furnished on mar
riages for the sake of titles, na one side, and
money on the other, is a powerful one. The
disclosures of greed and brutality and the
discovery that even the titlewhich furnished
the sale recommendation of this adventure,
was not genuine, may not be reproduced in
every internatioual match. But the case is,
nevertheless, a remarkable example of the
resnlts tnat are possible from the pecuniary
notions that furnish the sole inspiration of
titled heiress hunters.
It is certainly an impressive warning to
American girls, that marriages in which the
thorough acquaintance and mutual knowl
edge that can only make marriage safe are
thrown aside for sordid or silly notions, bring
fearful hazards in their irake.
NO DISPUTE NECESSAEY.
There is room for suggesting the need
of restrainicg the tendency to make the
gifts of our public spirited people of wealth
the subject of unnecessary disputes. "With
out more than alluding to the Carnegie
Library matter, it is pertinent to say that
the dispute over the donation of Mrs. Schen
ley of a site for the Blind Asylum can be
avoided. Sirs. Schenley having seen fit to
offer a particular site to the institution, it
certainly was not the function of the man
agers to reject the offer or to say that they
would prefer another location. Another
site might be preferable; indeed it seems as
if for that purpose a rural neighborhood
would be better. But the managers of the
asylum were certainly acting within their
rights to take what Mrs. Schenley offered
them.
On the other hand the interests of the
city need not suffer at all. If the location
is needed for the main entrance to Schenley
Park, the city can condemn the property,
and with the money paid for the land
needed, the asylum managers can find
ground for their institution somewhere else.
It should be recognized that here are two
organizations each acting within their own
rights for the public welfare. Their inter
ests may conflict somewhat; but the law
provides so clear a method for settling any
such conflict that it ought to be possible to
get along without disputes. "When such
splendid donations are being made to the
public it is not a matter for congratulation
that a quarrelsome spirit should arise
among the disputants.
POT HUNTING IN APEICA.
The feat of some ot the gilded youth of
our countrv in journeying to the interior of
Africa and returning with a proud record of
two hundred elephants slain and left on the
plains of Masai-land, indicates that the
United States is repaying to the older hem
isphere the extinction of its buffalo by
European pot hunters which took place
after the opening of the Pacific railroads.
European comment is not unnaturally
quite severe upon the sportsmanship which
takes delight in destroying animal life for
no purpose except that of indiscriminate
slaughter. It is clear that if this sort of
hunting is kepi up, the elephants of Africa
are as surely doomed as the buffalo of our
plains. Hunting for ivory, to be used in
commerce, or to supply food for the popula
tion of the district is legitimate. But, as
Stanley has pointed out, the ravages of hun
ters have already driven the big game from
vast tracts of Atrican territory, and is ex
terminating what might be preserved as the
food supply for railroad labor and the popu
lation of Africa lor future years.
The civilized taste for wholesale slaughter
as a sport ought to be restrained; but there
is a degree of poetical justice that as the
Old "World sportsmen helped exterminate
our buffalo, the Nimrods of the New "World
are paying it back by wiping out the ele
phants of Africa.
THE VALUE OF WATEE-WAYS.
The opening of the season of lake and
canal navigation is not only accompanied
by a stimulation of. business in the cities
along that line of transportation, but it also
shows its influence on the conditions of
trade and agriculture. "With the water
route open there is no likelihood that the
farmers whose grain can be shipped that way
will be forced to burn up their products for
fuel, or prove unable to ship the most im
portant staples to market. The effect of that
great water-way is an example of what
might be done by an adequate plan of con
necting the headwaters of the Ohio with
the seaboard. Such a route would give
cheap water transportation all the way
from the Missouri to the East. Under such
circumstances Kansas would not be re
quired to burn its corn for fuel, nor would
the coal of Pennsylvania be restricted by
railway discrimination in seeking markets
either to the East or West. The project is
one of national importance and should not
be lost sight of.
THE POEK COENEE.
The pork corner, which jnmped the price
of that staple yesterday irom about 10 to
over $14, furnishes an example of the vice
of speculation. It was not necessarily deal
ing in futures that caught the fellows who
are to be pinched by the corner, but it was
dealing in futures without any intention of
filling the contract except by selling the
differences, or paying the bet, that made it
possible for the unwary shorts to besqueezed.
Another -point thrusts itself on the at
tention. This corner would be impossible
unless the supply ot pork were somewhat
depleted. For the last few months the
country has heard a great deal about the
over-supply of corn, and the hardships of
the Western farmers by reason of the de
pression of the price of that staple. The
Dispatch has suggested that matters for
the farmers might be improved if they con
verted their corn into pork, instead of burn
ing it up. The conclusion is pretty well
demonstrated by this advance in the price of
pork.
"We regret to observe that the bad ex
ample set by a typographical error In The
Disfatch some time ago, of referring to our
city as"Pillsbury," has spread until itthreatens
to become epidemic Dunlop's Stage Ifews in
sists on locating all our dramatic events in that
mythical town, the last cue peing a statement
that Mr. Henderson is going to build a new
theater at'Pfllsbury." We hereby serve no
tice on all our cotemporaries that Pittsburg
will take credit tor all the statesmen, theaters
and manufacturing establishments that may
hereafter be credited to that wholly apocryphal
city.
The Allegheny Mayoralty contest seems
to be degenerating Into a fight on technicali
ties. Considering that the only question ought
to be who got the most legal votes, the dispo
sition to take refuge behind hair splitting Is
not a commendable one.
The discovery that a labor boss in one of
tbo Bbarpsburg mills bas been assessing each
of the men wbo got positions under him from
fifty cents to a dollar each payday, and has
finally lit oat with the proceeds, is an illustra
tion of the various ways in which crookedness
can levy bnrdens on the ignorant. The practice,
if It is as charged, was a peculiarly extortion
ate one, and reveals the depths to which the
wages of unassimllated labor can be squeezed
down, where people are unscrupulous enough
to do it.
The report that "Gould and the Vander
bilts are negotiating," is calculated to make
common people take a new grip on any little
unconsidered trifles of property that may have
escaped the absorption of the railway combi
nation. The disposition of the New York papers
to attack the World tor its sensationalism is
natural and perhaps not wholly unjustifiable;
but when the charge is made tbat its account
of the Adriatic's leaving the City of Paris was
blackmail it amounts to an exceedingly mean
piece ot small poUto newspaper jealousy. The
mistake made by the World was the mistake
of all the passengers on the disabled steamer;
and its report was practically the same as tbat
made by the Associated Press,
The fight is reported to be on again between
Scott and Wallace, while tbat between Quay
and the kickers has never been off. The pros
pect is a promising one for interesting scrim
mages before the nominations are made
The confession of that Chicago servant
girl who poisoned her employers with rat
poison, because she Intended to poison herself
for disappointed love, but thought she would
try it on the family first, has a grim humor
about it that would be funny if it were not so
serious. Hereafter rules for domestic service
will stipulate that the servants shall try poison
on themselves first, and if it does not kill them,
conclude that it will be useless to try it on tbe
family.
The stiffening of prices in iron is war
ranted by the strong demand and enhanced
cost of materials. But the slowness with which
prices advance convey the warning that a boom
would quickly collapse
The representatives of the Associated
Press have neeu provided with admission to
the electrical execution of Kemmler at Buf
falo. The official opinion seems to be tbat the
law forbidding newspaper accounts of execu
tions, being like the Constitution of Pennsyl
vania, self-enforcing, can be left to enforce it
self. The law is a foolish one, but should not
even foolish laws be enforced if they cau be?
An electric combination whose capital
is fixed at $50,000,000 evidently pays as much at
tention to water power a3 a financiering force
as to electrical power as a material force.
The telephone connection to "Wheeling
broke up the little game of a sharper yesterday
who tried to work off a bogus check on a
Wheeling bank upon the manager ot tbe
Curry Institute. Hereafter, tbe ohevaliers of
crookedness who wish to get worthless checks
cashed will do wisely to steer clear of offices
with telephones.
With a new brand of cigars named after
Nellie Bly, Pittsburg's female globe-trotter
seems likely to have made at least a qualified
success in setting the world on fire.
The presumptive republic of Brazil has
sketched out a constitution for itself. Being
modeled on the North American plan, it is a
good one. If the Brazilians adopt it they will
be on an equality with the United States, and
if they live carefully up to its principles they
will be just so much ahead of us.
Tammany disapproves of Tom Piatt,
and Tom Piatt disapproves of Tammany. Both
are entirely correct so long as they do not in
dorse themselves.
Sixty per cent reduction in the sugar
duties would do a great deal toward taking
sugar out of politics. That, is the Sugar Trusts'
kind of sugar. The old political sugar will still
exercise its influence antil deeper reforms
than that of tariff duties can be made.
PROMINENT PEOPLE.
Senator Mobbili. will celebrate his 80th
birthday to-morrow,
Ex-Governor Pollock's condition is not
so encouraging. He is decidedly weaker than
at any time since bis arrival in Lock Haven.
Chablxs Emory Smith is still in London,
and seems loth to exchange its attractions for
those of the Russian capital, to which he is dip
lomatically accredited.
General B. F. Cutler has accepted tbe
invitation of tbe Port Royal Society to attend
the twenty-fifth anniversary of the restoration
of the Union flag over Fort Sumpter.
Mifflin Paul, founder of Seabright, died
Thursday morning at Seabright of heart fail
ure, aged 76. He was very wealthy and owned
a vast amount of property at tbat place
The regents of tbe University of Kansas
have elected Frank H. Snow, president and
professor of natural science, to the chancellor
ship, which has been vacant since last July.
Among the passengers on tho steamer Elder
yesterday was Hon. John Billon on bis way
from Australia in improved health, to resume
bis. duties in the British House of Commons.
General W. T. Sherman has declined all
invitations that will prevent bis being in Bos
ton during the second week of August, as he
desires to participate in the national encamp
ment of the G. A B., which begins on August
12.
General Crook was a man of very strong
affections. The last time tbat he was at tbe
old homestead near Dayton, O., was on Sep
tember S. 1878, his fiftieth birthday. He told
bis brothers then that it would ba long beforo
be would return. "The fact is," he said, "it is
easier for me to stay away from here than to
get away if X come here. It hurts less."
A dispatch from Cannes says that Mr. Stan
ley has declined King Leopold's invitation to
attend the Anti-Slavery Congress now sitting
in Brussels. Dr. Parks, who accompanied Mr.
Stanley on his expedition to the inferior of
Africa, and who is now with him at Cannes, de
clares tbat Emin Pasha is suffering from an
incurable cataract, and that before a year
elapses ho will be blind.
A Good Deal of Opining.
Trom the New York Tribune. J
An Englishman who has been in this city
three days bas discovered that American news
papers never think anything; they always
opine." Come to think of it, there is a good
deal of "opining" in this country. But then
we don't exclaim, "Only fahncy, now," quite
as often as a native of the tight little isle.
Opposition to tbe lee Monopoly.
CHESTER, April 12. Chester hotel keepers,
butchers. Ice-cream makers and other large
consumers of ice have organized a company
for the manufacture of ice. This is a protec
tive movement, as the Ice companies have ad
vanced the price 75 per cent over last year's
prices. Over $33,000 worth of stock has been
taken.
A Blow nt Corporal Pnnlibment.
From tbe Buffalo Express.
The superintendent of the Boston public
schools bas struck a severe blow at corporal
punishment by asserting tbat the poorest
teachers do the most flogging. Incompetent
teachers will be apt to refrain from tbe ferrule
to avoid advertising tbeir shortcomings.
A Mad Alternative,
From the New York Herald.
Women have captured the town ot Edgerton,
Kan., on tbe issue of no screens to tbe' billiard
saloons, and the men Jiave now to face tbe al
ternatl ve of improving their play or putting up
Heir ciert
THE TOPICAL TALKER.
The Ten of the Tooib-Brmh Tlie Crazr
Clock In City Ilall How a Woman
Whiles Away Her Time Some New and
True Snnko Stories.
The tcoth-brnsh might be termed the test of
birth and breeding.
Not long ago in a town not a million miles
from Pittsburg a certain woman, wbo had been
all ber life previous in very bumble circum
stances, suddenly fell into a large fortune. By
the way there is nothing so convenient and
pleasant to possess as a distant relative who is
willing to die at an appropriate moment and
leave you a cool million or so. Doubtless this
poor woman who inherited mote money tban
she knew what to do with from a man she had
hardly known wore mourning for him In all
sincerity. But could her flesh be blamed for
rejoicing at tbe banishment of poverty's cruel
counselors?
But it was not to philosophize on the effects
ot a sadden access of riches that this story was
begun. She built a great bouse, furnished it
sumptuously, and then went down to tbe drug
store. Sbo bought no end of those curiously
useless glmcracks which accumulate on drug
gist's counters, and last of all she said to tbe
young man with the well-oiled bang who was
waiting upon ber: "You may put up Bix or
seven of your best tooth-brushes, please I
want one for each of tbe spare rooms!"
"Why doesn't somebody sue the city for keep
ing a crazy clock in the tower of City
Hall? It is a nuisance of tbe worst sort, and
one which affects almost everybody.
Mapoleon recommonded audacity as a use
ful thing for a general or a statesman to
have around the house. It has found favor in
tbe eyes of an upholsterer of whom I bavo
beard tell.
He sold a mattress to a lady who was furnish
ing a new town house. The mattress was sup
posed to be made of hair. When it was de
livered, however, tho fair housekeeper who
happened to bo country.born fancied she smelt
about It a familiar odor, that remlnaed ber of
haying-time The odor for once was distasteful
to indelicate nostrils, and she attacked the
mattress with a knife. Lo and beholdl there
was a haymow, and not a solitary hair to be
seen.
She sent for the upholsterer. He came and
almost shed tears over the haymow. -
"Madam," said be, "I will see to it myself
that) rou get a genuine bair mattress at once."
By and by tbe second mattress came. It did
not smell of hay. Still a subtle and perplex
ing smell hung about tbe guaranteed article.
The fair housekeeper was puzzled, but she had
come to be suspicious of hair mattresses. Once
more she applied tbe knife to the ticking, and
opened a corner of tbe mattress. Tbis time
hair, genuine horse hair, revealed itself. But
more pungent and peculiar than ever, an odor
also came from the dark continent of the mat.
tress. Further investigation was imperative
Sbe ripped off the whole covering of the mat
tress, and still undeniably real bair met her
eye everywhere Casually her sleeve button
caught in the hair, and as she raised it the
secret of tbe mattress and the odor came to
light. There was nothing more than a thin
layer over a substratum of rags, not too clean
rags at that.
Sbe did not change mattresses any more.
Sbe changed unnolstetcrs. From which we
may conclude that audacity is not always
profitable in an upholsterer even in himself.
T7 ate Is not always kiud, and yesterday after
noon I found myself in the heart of a dry
goods store in Allegheny, with several hundred
infuriated female shoppers on all sides.
As I was extricating myself from this perilous
position, I encountered a lady I knew, Sbe said:
"Tbis is just dreadful! I missed the 2 o'clock
train, and I have had to put in an hour here al.
most to while away tbe time."
"Why come here?" I asked, "and how do you
while away tbe time?"
"Ob, just looking at things," she answered.
"It's very tiresome, though," she added, as a
young woman deposited a great pile of lace
goods in front of her.
"It must be expensive, too," I remarked.
"Ob, dear, nol 1 don't think of buying any.
thing, you know."
Cnake stories are usually told by men. Man
seems to be privileged to see more snakes
tban woman, although it will be remembered
tbat tbe first snake story of all was told by
Eve.
Still the narrator of the following scrap of
veracious history was of the fair sex. She
said: "About four miles from Lake Helen, in
Volusia county, Fla., there is a gloomy cypress
swamp, known as Deep creek. There is, prop
erly speaking, no road through this swamp, bnt
it is possible to drive through it. if one has lota
of nerve and a very high vehicle. The nerve
is needed because moccasin snakes make this
swamp their rendezvous, and your buggy must
be high because you have to drive through
water tbat at times is over the hubs. People
make the trip as they voluntarily go down into
tbe chamber of horrors at the Eden Musee
Once had, the experience lasts a lifetime.
"For about a mile and a balf you drive be
tween cypress trees that meet and interlace
above your head. It Is a dim twilight at mid
day, and the way is so narrow that to get
through seems Impossible. But the acute hor
ror of the place lies not in tbe funereal light,
tbe great grim trees or tbe dark waters tbrongb
which the wheels churn their way. From the
big cypress trees hang innumerable moccasins.
Clinging by their tails they hang down till their
heads are low enough to touch the toD of tbe
buggy. Tbat reminds me tbat it is advisable to
have the top up, unless you want a sleepy moc
assin dropping into your lap every minute or so."
i
pvERYBODT who gets within 20 miles of Deep
creek feels the fascination of the place, it
appears. Once a couple, decidedly elderly, be
was over 80 and she would never see 70 again,
beard of the wonderful cypress trees and their
weird decorations and came over to go through
Deep creek. They reached the place abont
sunset, but in spite of the objections of tbe
man who drove their carriage they insisted on
making the passage.
They were horribly frightened for their pains,
and when they bad traversed tbe mile and a
half of swamp they offered the driver any sum
he liked to take them back another way. But
there was no other way. In tbe pitch darkness
tbe return trip was made. Just as they emerged
upon dry land they met four drunken men who
were bent upon crossing the swamp.
fN another occasion a timid and extremely
nervous girl was bantered by her compan
ions into tbe ordeal of Deep Creek.
One ot those who bad teased her into the at
tempt went before ber on horseback. She made
things worse, for she kept hitting-ih sleepy
moccasins with her whip, causing them to fall
upon the buggy in which her timorous friend
was following. The result was tbat tbe latter
fainted dead away before balf the distance was
traversed, and they bad a dickens of a time
.getting her out of the swamp.
Hepburn Johns.
Net Appropriately Named.
Prom the San Francisco Alta,
Tho parents of triplets in a North Dakota
town have named them Faith, Hope and Char
ity. That is pure Dakotese. The State was
admitted on faith, it has no hope, and has
bawled for charity ever since it got into the
Union.
Rlvnla In tbe Business.
From ihe New York Times.
Dr. Peters rivals Stanley now in the number
of times he has been slain by the dispatches and
regularly brought to life again.
DEATHS OP A DAY.
John Grognn.
John Grogan, a member of Soutbslde Council,
of the Jr. O. V. A. it., died yesterday afternoon,
of consumption. Members of the council will
meet at Weber's Halt, corner Twenty-seventh
and Sarah streets, at 1 P. at. Monday and proceed
to the residence of the deceased, No. 507 Forbes
street. Tbe burial will take place in Allegheny
cemetery. '
JHnrqnla Tseng.
Paris, April' 12. Marquis Tien, the well
known Chinese statesman, and former Minister
to the courts of London, Paris and St. Peters
burg, is dead.
Joseph Adnma.
Joseph Adams, proprietor of tbe Mansfield
Hotel, died Thursday morning. The funeral
services will be held to-day. Mr. Adams was one
of the oldest residents of MansCeld.
Alexander L. Martinez.
TonoNTO, April 12. Alexander L. Martinez,
i Deputy Minister of Education, of this province,
tuea last cvcuiuk ui yucuiuvuia.
TJNPR0PITI0US WEATHER
Enable Queen Tietoria to Pat In Her Spare
Time on That Uniform.
tBT C4BLS TO TITS DISPATCH, 1
London, April 12. The clerk of the weather
bas bad so many worries in America of late
that be bas quite forgotten tbe fact that Queen
Victoria ,is sojourning for the benefit of her
health at Alx Les Bains, and has allowed her
rubicund royal features to be rudely nipped by
piercing cold winds instead of sending the
invalid Majesty the balmy breezes for which
sno had bargained and to which courtiers con
sider sbe was entitled. The court news man,
in tbe course of his daily duty, has been more
than once compelled to inform tbe world tbat
Her Majesty has felt the cold, and a wail of
sympathy, with an undertone of loyal indigna
tion against the clerk aforesaid, has been
beard through the length and breadth of Great
Britain. But if tbe weather in Savoy has
smacked somewhat of the North pole, it has
not been altogether without compensating ad
vantages, for it has enabled Queen Victoria to
give more attention to tbe manufacture ot the
new uniform which sbe proposes to- wear, in
defiance of the unmilitary mold in which
nature has cast her, during her approaching
visit toDarmstadt,in virtue of her rank as Col
onel of a regiment of Prussian dragoon guards.
Particulars as to the shape, color and texture
of the uniform are discreetly withheld from a
scoffing world, except in regard to the jacket
tunic, which, we are graciously permitted to
know, Is of brigbt blue clotb, with a red collar
adorned with gold stripes and the Queen's
monogram in bullion. It cannot be denied that
this description is incompleto and unsatisfac
tory. For the sake of tbe ladles wbo read Tbe
Dispatch, your Berlin correspondent has
striven earnestly to raise the veil behind which
the German tailors are working upon Colonel
Victoria Regina's uniform, but so far he bas
ignominiously failed.
THE WAYS OP WORLDLINGS.
Human Nature Portrayed With n Pen Flow
ing With Wit and Philosophy.
rWBITTBN TOR TBI DISPATCH.
A Spring Ode.
I.
(What the poet wrote.)
The buds begin to deck tbe trees,
All cloudless Is the sky;
There's perfume In the vernal breeze;
Tbe fowl Is banging high!
II.
(The exact state of the weather when the poet's
lines appeared.)
All gaunt and naked were tbe trees.
And overcast the sky;
Tbe snow came down, the boreal breeze
Piled a rifts up six feet blgb.
(Moral.)
Though poets need not cease to sing,
This fact Is very clear:
They should not sing about the spring
Until the summer's here.
Tbe Plea Didn't Save II Im.
Judge You bear what the officer says, prisoner,
that you took a satchel from tbe Grand Central
depot yesterday?
Prisoner It Is true Your Honor, but I don't
think that I.stjould be punished for taking such a
little thing as a satchel, when people who take
bigger things are not Interfered with.
Judge Kxplaln yourself.
Prisoner Why, just before 1 took tbe satchel, I
saw a man taking a train and nobody molested
him!
Giving Up Smoking.
Although he'll refuse without doubt, to confess.
No matter bow hard he is pressed
When a youth gives up smoking 'tis easy to guess:
It is at some fair maiden's request.
And when be at some future period, resumes
The pipe, cigarette or cigar.
And more of the "soother" than ever consumes
He's married -or there's been ajar.
Conldn't Do It.
Customer I am Just fitting up a new office and
want some pens, Ink and paper, and I want 'em
on time.
Stationer Can't sell on time.
C.-No?
8. No; His Impossible to keep running ac
counts tn our business.
C.-WbT so?
S. Because our business Is stationery.
About Tbis Benson.
Tbe sealskin sacque-the ladles doff It
And lighter wraps put on.
And of the lying weather prophet
Tbe occupation's gone.
A Conundrum Answered.
Arabella asks: What Is the difference between
an artist's model and a pugilist?
The difference, dear. Is that the artist's model
puts himself in a striking attitude while the
pugilist puts himself in an attitude to strike-
He Goea to That Hease No More.
"I would I were a bird, " she sang;
He sild, "I would you were;
Your cage outside I then would bang
And let yon warble there."
On an Ocean Steamship.
Bmlth-There's old Moneybags leaning over tbe
rail; he's as sick a man as I ever saw.
Jones What's he leaning over tli?rall for?
g. Making contributions, to Neptune,
. Then, by Jove, they are the first contribu
tions be ever made to anything ia his life I
There's Some Difference.
You may safely call your sweetheart your
precious kitten, but It Isn't safe to call your wife
your dear old cat. ,
At the Charity Concert.
"That girl can't sing at all; it is a mere bawl,)
"Yes, a charity bawl."
A Paradox.
"I am lost, " said the defaulter, and strange to
say, It was just after he was round out.
They cmlle.
Two men who have promised each other to drink
no more Intoxicating liquors for a year, accident
ally meet in a sample room.
Says tbe first: "1 I came in to look for a
friend."
" Says the second: "So did I."
"Do you see your friend?"
"Yes, 1 think I see him on the shelf there be
hind the bar."
"Why, tbat Is Just the friend 1 was looking
for."
Then they smile.
Worth Ten Thonannd.
Two friends meet after a separation of ten years.
"How are you doing, old man?" asks one.
"Middling." ,
'llich. I suppose?"
"Not worth a cent." ,
"Married?"
"No. How are you doing?"
"Well, they say every child a man bas Is worth
12,000 to him. I'm worth sic, 000; l'ye got five
children."
Where Ignorance I Bliss, Etc,
The mark he surely did not miss,
As fools may e'en surmise,
Who wrote: "Where Ignorance is bliss
'Tis folly to be wise"
We eat the maple sugar sweet.
And (eel ourselves In clprer
Ne'er thinking tbat the saccharine treat
Is last year's melted over.
A Paraphrase.
Tbe culprit climbed tbe scaffold stair,
Tbe noose bung o'er his bead:
And as he saw it dangling there
"Well. I'll be hanged!" he said.
Felt He Wouldn't Salt.
Count Pinchbeck Your rather' Is a political re-,
former. Miss Box?
Miss Box Yes; nothing but an honest count
tW1 suit him.
Count!'. Then I wlllwlib yon a very good
good evening.
Sparks.
When the Impecunious man takes bis Watch to
the pawnbroker's he realizes that time Is money.
"Talk Is cheap." Back talk sometimes costs
the talker a black eye.
Tbe man who thinks he Is brigbt Is seldom In
clined to keep It dark.
"A cood reputation," says an exchange "is
made by never being found out."
Yes, among bill collectors.
Lovely Woman's Eye.
Anent female beauty, the state of the case is
As all men aver wbo are wise
There-never were yet on tbe eartb homely faces
In which there were love-beaming eyes.
Oeoiice Hurseli. Jackson.
Will Bent Knpld Transit.
From tbe Philadelphia Inquirer.
If people in a hurry to get to their destina
tions will start as soon as the waltune is good
they will cat there before rapid transit over
takes them.
THE MARTYR PRESIDENT.
To-Morrovr Is Ihe Twenty-Flfili Annl-
' versnry of ihe Untimely Taking Off of
Abraham Lincoln Tbe Bright Sunlight
ot Victory Followed by the Dark Cloud
of Assassination.
"iWRITTKN FOR THE DISPATCH.
'Twenty-five years ago since the dawn of
peace glistened and brightened tbe skies of
tbis land. Tbe weary and bloody months of
death and ruin and destruction had passed
away, and under the Appomattox- tree in the
early days of April. 1565. the last act in the
great drama of tho battles bad taken place It
was April 7 when General Robert E.Lee folded
the standard of the Confederacy and ended his
soldier career forever. The news had flashed
over the country amid the booming of cannon,
tbe ringing of joy bells and tbe cheers of count
less thousands. Were not tbe dark days gone
forever and were not millions of homes to be
made gladsome again by the presence of loved
ones who had stood for years in the shadow
and peril of death.
It was a time of exultation at the North, and
even in the Sonth there were sighs ot relief
that the ruin and desolation wrought by tbe
war was at last ended. Sevan days after the
surrender cams tho news that whitened tbe
faces of the men and women of the North and
made their fellow-countrymen at tbe South
stand In sbuddering horror as they were told
of theterrible crime. On the night of April
14. 1S63, Abraham Lincoln was assassinated.
For a moment the heart of tbe nation stood
still. Tbe mighty cloud of sable which fell
over all was but as a shadow from tbe midnight
abyss of the nation's gloom. Everywhere there
was a vast and overmastering sense of personal
woe. The tracedv itself took on blackness by
contrast with tbe roseate hues by which tbe
week's opening hours were made so refulgent
xi. juoreu irom tne antnem ot praise to tne
mournful march of death. Nothing In our
four years of marvelous emotions approached
it in power and intensity.
The Greatness of the Man.
'J'nESE scenes are all recalled because after all
they were of the very marrow of tbe so
emn occasion. Tbe marvelous outbursts of grief
that shook the nation taught tbe world as could
not otherwise have been the case, how firmly
Abraham Lincoln's name and honor was plant
ed in the hearts of all the people. Party lines
faded. Even foes were as one in the common
grief. Within the lines of the ex-Confederacy
the evidence was abundant of a terrible grief.
Tbe Southerners felt indeed as if in their ex
tremity they had lost tbeir protector, and no
where was Mr. Lincoln's death more sincerely
mourned tban in tbe section against which he
bad nnswervingly for four long years pressed
tbe mighty forces of the Union, Indeed it was
an awful epoch I
One may well wonder how much heredity had
to do with tbe making of Abraham Lincoln,
gaunt, homely man of six foot four, whose fate
it was to lead the "Democracy of the average"
Into the loftier realms of heroic growth and to
fall as victim by tbo assassin's hand of a slave
crazed player. It is certain that the limestone
waters and nnra atmnnhfra nt Kentuckv and
Illinois bad much to do with the great figure,
large bones and huge stature ot this genuine
man of tbe people. How much bad his simple
ancestry to do with tbe mold and quality of
bis brain? The Lincoln strain was purely
Saxon in character far more Teutonic even
tban tbe Prussian or Brandenburg, wbo Indeed
is a good deal of a Slavonian. Tbe first Ameri
can Lincoln settled in Massachusetts, and was
from Norfolk, tbe English shrine wnlch was
tbe center of the Angles' invasion and settle
ment. From Massachusetts to Pennsylvania
and thence to Virginia, until Abraham's grand
father settled in Virginia. The close companion
of Daniel Boone, after tbe Revolution he
moved with his friend into Kentucky. "Old
Abe" was horn in Hardin, Ohio.
The Mnryrs's Mother.
Tt was, however, from his mother that Lin
coln got tbe finer gray matter ot his brain
and that temperament which was so powerful
an ally of his beneficent mentality. Nancy
Hanks came of a West Briton stock the old
Cymruan Celt, transferred therefrom to Ire
land and toncbed to quickening spirit by
Milesian activity. Tbe Dublin Hanks, a
famous Quaker family of tbe English roll,
claim a very direct collateral connection with
tbe American Hanks, of which Nancy was one
of tbe insignificant members when living.
General Hanks, one of Cromwell's commanders
In tbe subjugation of Ireland, was of tbe same
stock.
But that was a wonderful period in which
Abraham Lincoln was made. Born in 1809, the
Kentucky boy became a man conscious of
power just as tbe political influences of tbe
slave system began to assert themselves. What
was learned was thorougbly and it whetted
tbeir appetites for more It was not really till
after 1820 that tbero came into being those
combinations on botb sides of the Ohio wblch
led so steadily up to Civil War or secession.
In 1830 Abraham Lincoln was 21, fully able to
take bis place on tbe one side or tbe other. He
was of the non-slaveholding class, of tbosa who
but a tew years later and on until tbe war
ended, were known as "poor, wblte trash."
All along tbe eastern foothills and bench of
the Appalachians, from the Potomac to Geor
gia, descendants of tbe men who followed
Marion and Sumpter, were forced back to the
harsber hill farms or out of the region into tbe
Ohio Valley, by tho growth o( tbe plantations
and tbe profits created by tbo cotton-gin, slave
breeding and owning. These, men and women
hated slavery; generally, too, they bated tbe
"nigger." Abraham was too philosophically
broad-minded to hate, but be stood strongly on
the side of free labor. Tbe central and soutbern
counties of Illinois and Indiana wore full of tbe
class of which be came and of whom and be
yond be bas been the noblest representative.
Brigbt Men of tbe Time.
TTHAT a galaxy of young fellows they were
In Sangamon county in Lincoln's young
manhood. Henden and Shield one cold and
the other hot, florid, not to say flurried. David
Davis, prudent and careful beyond his years, a
judge even in bis earliest pro'sing. John Cal
houn, one of Lincoln's earliest friends, is an
other of tbe forgotten ones. Yet be once filled
a somewhat memorable niche in a rather in
famous sauabble as tbe verdict of history goes.
Calhoun was Buchanan's Surveyor General In
the Territory of Kansas, and was the leader ot
the Constitntional Convention whose abortive
piece of work was one of tbe serious misfor
tunes of tbe Democratic party in tbe decade
preceding the civil war.
Mr. Calhoun was "Abe" Lincoln's chief when
the latter was a Deputy County Surveyor.
Among his younger associates was Senator Bud,
Colonel Baker, of Oregon, and "Dick" Yates,
afterward Governor and United States Senator
from Illinois tbe executive wbo commissioned
Grant as a Colonel. Mr. Lincoln himself used
to tell a story of Colonel Baker which always
made considerable laughter at that gentleman.
He was of English birth, and as a boy asrell as
a man be was very handsome. Lincoln .was a
little older, and Baker went home balf dis
posed to cry one evening. On being asked what
was the matter, be sobbed out that it was a
shame he bad been born in England and would
never be President, while "ugly Abu" was sure
to be. Even then the quaint and able youug
lawyer Impressed everyone with his power.
The Men of ihe Present.
JTe abe more complex and varied now, but
tbere have been losses as well as gain. It
would be hard for present condltious to breed
a lire, and character molded on such simple
yet harmonious lines as those which Abraham
Lincoln possessed outwardly and inwardly.
The wonderful harmony of bis character was
as complete as tbat of tbe mighty prairie land
in which be grew to greatness. He stands to
day as one ol tbe five most distinguished
Americans.
The heritage which Abraham Lincoln left be
hind him to the nation u as one of fraternity,
loyalty and charity. "With charity toward all
malice to none," be told the living generation,
and bis words re-echo through the 23 years
since he closed his eyes forever, that it is their
duty to see to it that "government by the peo
ple, through the people, for tbe people sball
not perish from tbe face of the eartb'
Liet it De said to tbe honor ol this nation tnat
its people have not unworthily filled out tbeir
dead hero's demand and bequest. S, G, N.
Barefaced Perjury.
Prom the Philadelphia Bulletin.
President Gompers, "of tbe Federation of
Labor, as a witness before tbe Congressional
committee, expressed the opinion tbat present
methods are not sufficient to keen out contract
immigrants. He thinks tbat tbe men appointed
to enforce tbe law are not in sympathy with it,
and that their formal questions to immigrants
are hot sufficient. He suggests the employment
of secret service officers to mingle with newly
arrived immigrants for tbe purpose of collect
ing evidence. The Congressmen must have been
impressed with the difficulty of the problem be
fore them, as barefaced perjury dbcurred under
their immediate notice while they were in
session.
Touching n Tender Spat.
From tbe New York Sun.
The Hon. William McKinley can never be
come the candidate of Massachusetts for
President. If his tariff bill had merely tanned
the hide of the Bay State, all might have been
forgiven. But when ho" proposes a tariff of
about 300 per cent on beans, tbe proud old
Commonwealth of James Otis and John Sulli
van revolves upon her ear in a dance of frenzy.
A tax on brains would not have hurt Massa
chusetts much pf late years, but a high tariff
on beans might be fatal to her. If tbe Re
publicans are rash enough to assault beans,
Massachusetts may be a Democratic State
A SURPRISED CONGREGATION.
A White Doto Enters a Church nnd Makes
Itself at Home.
ISPECIAt, TXfJCGBAX TO TUB DISrATCH.l
Syracuse, April 12. The Syracuse Confer
ence of tbe Wesleyan Methodist denomination
held lts'session near Chittengo station this last
week, and at the close of the morning service
four young men were ordained elders. Alter
tbe laying on of bands, according to tbe usual
custom, prayer was offered, during which a
beautiful white dove flew In at tbe door which
had been left open for ventilation, and alighted
on tbe open Bible on tbe pulpit. From there it
flew to and rested upon tbe heads ot two of the
young men wbo were being ordained, then
upon tbe bead of the eldest member of the
Conference, who was present, and then back to
the Bible In a few moments it arose and
rested upon tbe head of Kev. A. W. Hall,
financial agent of the denomination, and while
the Rev. E. W. Bruce, of Borne, was extending
tho right hand of fellowship to those who were
ordained and expressing to them words of
welcome and encouragement, it lighted upon
his bead and remained tbere until be had
nearly concluded tbe ceremony, wben it flew
back to the Bible and remained tbere until tbe
service closed. It was not at all frightened,
and all its movements were voluntary.
it is a tame dove which bad been raised in
the neighborhood, but had never been in the
cburch before, and came at tbat time of its
own accord. Its presence and movements pro
duced a feeling of deepest awe among tbe
congregation, and tbe scene will never be for
gotten by those who witnessed it.
Fish and GSnme Association.
Honksdale, April 12. A charter has been
asked for the Wayne County Fish and Game
Association with tbe following officers: Presi
dent, George 8. Purdy; Vice Presidents,
Thomas J. Ham and C E. Knapp; Secretary.
W. M. Gardner: Treasurer, E. C. Mumford:
Managers, Gilbert Wblte. F. G. Farnham, W.
S. Lambert. G. W.Lane. O. M. Spettigue. O. L.
Rowland and Dr. Robert V. Brady. Two hun
dred thousand brook trout fry have been
planted in the public streams hereabouts this
spring.
A MEDAL OF HONOR.
President Harrison nnd senator Erarta
Unite in Its Presentation.
Washington, April 12. A small company
assembled in tbe Blue Parlor of tbe White
House at noon to-day to witness tbe formal
presentation of a medal to Joseph Francis In
recognition uf his services in the construction
and perfection of life-saving appliances. The
medal is four Inches in diameter and contains
J7C0 worth of pure. gold. Tbe total cost of tbe
medal, exclusive of tbe design, was over 53.000.
There were present tbe President. Jlrs.McKee,
Mrs.Nimmlck, Senators Evans, Blair and Rea
gan, Representative Buchanan and a number
of ladies. Mr. Francis was accompanied by bis
son and Mrs. Johnson, an intimate friend.
Tbe ceremonies were simple and consisted
only of an address :by Senator Evarts. repre
senting Congress, an address by tbe President,
and a brief response of thanks by Mr. Francis,
wbo was so overcome tbat he could npt com.
plete bis remarks.
To Search Persons for Firearms.
Wilmamsvobt, April 12. In view of the
fact that several policemen in various parts of
the State have been shot recently by men whom
they arrested. Chief of Police Russell, by ad
vice of tbe Mayor, bas Instructed his officers to
search all prisoners immediately after tbey are
taken into custody. Tbis order applies on
every arrest niade, no matter what the charge
against tbe prisoner is. It is believed it will
hare a good effect on tbe rougher element, as
concealed weapons found upon tbem would be
followed by prosecution.
0DR ROAD EXPEDITION.
The Resnlts to be Obtained Cnnnot be Other
wise Tban Beneficial.
From the Youngstown Telegram.
With a view of ascertaining the exact con
dition of the country roads through Pennsylva
nia, and obtaining information as to wbat is
needed in the way of road improvements. The
Pittsbubo Dispatch has started out an ex
ploring expedition to traverse the roads in tbe
western and central portions ot tbe State A
corps of competent men accompany the expe
dition, which will be takeu in a wagon, with a
view of ascertaining facts, and obtaining in
formation by personal inspection and inter
viowswith residents along the roads as to wbat
is needed to improve tbe highways of tbe
State
Tbe results obtained cannot be otherwise
tban beneficial in throwing light upon tbe
question of road improvements, and the enter
prise ot The Dispatch is to be commended.
Foceral of Robert Morrow.
Tho funeral of Robert Morrow, late Yard
master of tbe Panhandle Railway, will take
place this afternoonfrom bis late residence.No.
105 Webster avenue. Tbo floral tributes by the
railway employes are unusually fine and ex
tensive Deceased was a member of a number
of societies, among them tbe Royal Arcanum.
He" was an active member of the County De
mocracy. SUMMER ENCAMPMENT.
Governor Denver and Adjutant-General
Uniting Making Arrangements.
Hakiusburg. April 12. Governor Beaver
and Adjutant-General Hasting were in Latrobe
conferring with Mr. Robert Coleman on tbe
arrangements at Mt. Gretna for tbe division
encampment tbis summer. It was suggested
that the grounds be enlarged, and Mr. Coleman
met that with the information that he bad al
ready enlarged the grounds and that he
further intended to enlarge the parade grounds.
, A line of railway has been run from the
mam line of the railroad to the rifle range,
where there is considerable room, and it is very
likely that a brigade will be encamped id tbat
vicinity. The United States troops will also
encamp at tbe same time as tbe Guard. Gen
eral Hastings will meet tbe bpigado command
ers at lit. Gretna next Monday.
Philadelphia Will Cherish His Memory.
From the Philadelphia ltecord.
In tbe death ot tbe vonerable George H.
Stuart, Philadelphia has lost one of ber most
valued citizens. He was a great merchant, a
distinguished phllantbrophist, and an honest.
God-fearing man. His memory will long be
cherished in this city as a possession to be
proud of."
A SEW STORY ABOUT LINCOLN.
No Particular Place for Aaylhlag Because
He Didn't Have the Placr.
The Chicago 2Vi5une tells tbe following:
"Although Mr. Lincoln was methodical In
many things he was Blovenly In some of the de
tails of his busiuess. He bad no particular
place for anything, for tbe reason, may be, tbat
be didn't have the particular place One smiles
as be sees a yellow bit ot paper, which was evi
dently a binding for a bundle of papers, on
which are written these grinning words:
"Wben. you can't find it anywhere else look
in this."
"It" meant something which Mr. Lincoln
knew would be wanted some time, and as there
was no particular place for "It" "it" was liable
to be slipped Into tnerbundle around which was
this binding.
KNEELING AT TI1E THRESHOLD.
I'm kneeling at tbe threshold, weary, faint and
sore.
Waiting for the dawning, for the opening of tbe
door
Waiting till the master shall bid me rise and
come
To the glory of his presence, to the gladnes of
bis borne.
A weary path I've traveled, 'mid darkness, storm
and strife
Bearing many a burden, struggling for my life:
But now the morn Is breaking my toll will soon
be o'er;
I'm kneeling at the thresbold-my hand Is on the
door.
llethlnks I bear the voices of the blessed as they
stand
Slngine in the sunshine of the far-off, sinless
land.
Ub, would that I were with tbem, amid the shin
ing throng.
Mingling in their worship. Joining In their song.
The friends that 'started with me have entered
long ago;
One by one left me struggling with the foe:
Their pilgrimage was shorter, their triumph
sooner won:
How lovingly they'll ball me when all my toll Is
done I
With them the blessed angels, tbat know no grief
or sin,
I see tbem by the portals, prepared to let me In.
O Lord, 1 wait thy pleasure thy time and way are
best;
Bat I'm wasted, worn and weary: O father, bid
merest! .
17. L. 'Alexander in Christian at Work.
CUKIODS COKMNSATI0K&
A petrified deer horn has been found
near Sv lranla, Ga.
A Bay City, Mich., man can make salt
for 8 cents a barrel.
Onecounty in Michigan paid nearly S00
forwoodchuck hide3 last year.
A company has been organized at Port
Townsend, Washington, to cultivate an oyster
farm of no acres. It will be stocked with the
best varieties from tBe East.
Charles Milton Gray, of Chicago, is
willing to go round the world on horseback tf
the Government will foot up tbe horse and ex
penses, and give him some sort of official recog.
nition.
The New York Tribune entered Thurs
day upon the fiftieth year of its existence One
of the compositors wbo helped to get out tbe
first number, Washington Dodge, bas been at
the case ever since
Mayor Glenn, of Atlanta, Ga., has
vetoed tbe liquor license granted to a woman
by the City Councils, on the ground that it is
against public policy to allow women to engage
lu tbe liquor business.
Annie Caplis, an 18-year-old girl em
ployed in the spice mills at Detroit, was caught
in an elevator Wednesday. Her beads was
crushed and tbe body dropped to the bottom of
tbe shaft, a distance of So feet.
A German photographer in Constanti
nople recently came near losing his life by
taking a negative of the Sultan in violation of
tbe Koran, which prohibits the reproduction of
the human figure or countenance.
"Wednesday morning a large steam heat
ing and cooking range In the Livingston county
j ail exploded into atoms. Five children were)
in tbe room, but escaped injury. Tbe exnlosion
shook tbe earth for several blocks.
The bolo flower, discovered by Dr.
Schadenberg growing upon a volcanic mountain
in one of the Philippine Islands, is perhaps the
largest flower in existence, being about 3 feet
in diameter and 22 pounds in weight.
A 17-year-old lad who climbed to the
dome of tbe State House at Topeka the other
day managed to fall to the basement, a distance
ot 80 feet, without breaking a bone. He is the
only person who ever made that trip alive.
A piece of pink coral 30 feet long and
9 inches in diameter at one end. with branches
projecting about 4 feet on all sides, was re
cently obtained on tbo coast of Japan. Its
valne in a prepared state would be about
tto.000.
Philadelphia is iu a state of mind
through fear of having second-band coffln9
passed off upon itthe discovery having been
made tbat coffins brought to the crematory are
not burned with the bodies, but are preserved
by tbe attendants and" sold again.
An engineer on the Iron Mountain road
has perfected an automatic bell ringer on his
locomotive, and now, when running in corpora
tion limits or whenever the bell must bo rung,
he just jerks a spring and the bell is kept going
by steam power till he turns off tbe steam.
Near Colnmbus, O., a lot of hogs set
upon a heifer and a young calf and devoured
them. In an adjoining pasture a drove ot
cattle became infuriated at tbe smell of the
blood, broke down tbe fence and charged upon
the hogs, killing ten of tbem and wounding
many more
A saurian, venerable in years and
kingly in proportions, has for years made his
home on Gadsden point near the Tampa.
Many times bis 'gatorsbip has been rudely
awakened by tbe sharp crack of the sports
man's gun. and many futile attempts have been
made to rob him of his bide.
From its source to its mouth the Ama
zon is 3,500 miles in length, but tbo name Ama
zon is not continuous; and it is called by three
different names in that space From its Lake
Itasca source to the gulf the Mississippi is 2,613
miles long, and from its Missouri tributary
source to tbe gulf, 4, Ml miles in length.
A wealthy Jackson county man died
recently, and after the last sad rites the family
made a search for the will, but couldn't find it.
Finally some one suggested that tbe body
should be exhumed. This was done, and in tbe
inside pocket of tbe grave coat tbe will was
found. The careful citizen had put it there for
safe keeping.
Charles Seitz, ot "West Fairfield, West
moreland county, found a piece of glass about
one-half inch long and one-sixteenth of an
inch tbiek, sharp on three edges, which had
been embedded in his knee since tbe wreck on
the 16th of August, 1SSO. oo tbe Butler branch.
nearSarver station, in wblch' be was cut and
bruised. It annoyed him a great deal since
until Tuesday evening, when it cut Its way
out.
It is now believed that the mammoth
abounded to as great an extent npon tbe east
as on the west coast of Behring Sea. In fact,
mammoths have already been discovered in
Alaska, and news comes that a syndicate has
been formed for the purpose of procuring their
ivory tusks, which are now of great value and
which will undoubtedly continne to become
more valuable, as tbe elephant is being exter
minated. In 1835 the Chicago postoffice was a log
ouildingat the corner of South Water and
Lake streets. The postofiice was on one side of
tbe room and a grocery and bar on the other.
A Justice of tbe Peace held court upstairs.
One day a penny dropped from tbe ceiling ot
the postoffice to tbe floor. Two or three fellows
rushed for it. The postmaster, John S. C. Be
gan, rushed out and said: "Let it alone; don't
touch It. Tbe jury upstairs bas flipped for
heads or tails to see wbat shall be done with
the man on trial." Sure enough, the next min
ute tbe foreman came down a ladder looking
for tbe penny.
One day last fall, while picking cotton,
Ellen Powell, a negro woman, lost a bag from
her person containing $3 in silver. Sbe was
working for N.Hughes, wbo superintends tbo
plantation of N. a. Banm, near Toomsboro.
Last week, after a thunder cloud bad just
passed, sbe was at work in tbe same field
knocking down cotton stalks. Seeing a beauti
ful rainbow across tbe field, and thinking at
tbe same time of tbe lost money. Mr. Hughes
told Ellen to go to the end of It and sbe would
find her money. She took him at his word, and
Justin front'of her, about 100 yards or more,
where the end of the rainbow appeared to be,
she looked on tbe gronnd and found her lost
money.
CURRENT TIMELY TOPICS.
WOSDEHFUI, speed was obtained at the tele
graphers' tournament in cwYork. But what a
business public demands is faster telegraph
messengers.
Several newspapers are endeavoring to
bother Hepresentative Phelan, ofMlssourf. Up
to date his Phclans don't appear to have been In
jured to any alarming extent.
STitiKES are becoming epidemie A happy
and contented people will rejoice to learn, how
ever, that lluthcrford B. llayes hens are not of
the striking class and furnished a fresh sunply ot
eggs during the winter.
TftOTJBLES never come singly. A few days
ago we were told that the peach crop bad been
utterly ruined, that the watermelon would not be
half a crop and now comes the news from Florida
that strawberries have been attacked by a small
blue fly which desiccates the leaves. It thrives on
asbes and takes kindly to Paris green.
Now thit the engagement of Miss Anderson
bas been announced, exchanges that have been
calllngher '-Our Own Mary," will drop the habit,
She will not be "ours" much longer.
The Albany Journal asks: "Should news
papermen hold office?" They should, more es
pecially ir It Is a good "phat" one. But most
newpaper men get left in the deal as a rule. Are
you one of them?
Judoes Magee and Ening are the most
popular men in Pittsburg to-day at least among
'he successful applicants for license. If tbe many
lurky ones live up to the spirit of tbe law It will be
a sort of mutual admiration society a year hence
The army of oil producers suffer as much from
poor roads as does the farmer. Tbe only difference
Is that the producer is endowed with more Chris
tian fortitude.
Female lobbyists are recognized as legiti
mate factors in English politics. Tbey are not rec
ognized In this country, but at the same time they
are the means quite often of getting a bill through
Congress. And when they tacule.a politician he
generally votes the way they want him.
The under dog in a light gets the sympathy,
but the rrlends of the upper one rake In tbs
shekels.
The Democratic press still claims tbat nit
nols and Wlscc.nsln.are douotful States. But irtien
they say It they mean it Is doubtful wbether the un
terriSed will ever be able to catch more tban an
occasional constable or two.
NoTWTrHSTANPlSQ the herculean woftc per
formed by air. lieed since being elevated to the
Speakership. It Is said tbat bis salary 1 Just the
same as bis predecessor, A whole Congress within
himself, he should be better remunerated.
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