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THE PITTSBURG DISPATCH,1 THURSDAY, JANUARY U, 1889.
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PITTSBURG, THURSDAY. JAN. 24. 18S9.
THE CEITICAL POINT.
The report current in petroleum circles
yesterday that a consultation had taken
place in New Tort between the leaders of
the producers' organization and the Stand
ard, with regard to the disposition of that
five million barrels of oil out of which the
producers were to get the profits, indicate
that the shutdown of last year has reached
its critical point. It may be remembered
that in discussing the question, TnE Dis
rATCH pointed out the difficulty that was
likely to arise when it became necessary to
decide who is to take this surplus off the
market and p3y for it If the Standard
would perform that generous but probably
expensive act, the shutdown might achieve
success; but in view of the well-known fact
the Standard is not in the business for fun,
that termination of the deal is rather prob
lematical. The rumors yesterday were to the effect
that the Standard is not disposed to take the
oil and deplete its tank surplus to that ex
tent Perhaps they are erroneous, bat they
have an air of probability. In that case the
natural alternative will be the selling of the
oil on the market; and the results may place
before the producers the pertinent question
whether they have done as well for them
selves by playing the Standard's game as
they would have by giving the same energy
and strength to building np independent in
. terests among the actual and legitimate
buyers of oil.
The outcome of the meeting is, of course,
mainly conjecture, as yet; but it seems
pretty clear that the critical point of the
shutdown will come when the deal is closed
up.
PARADOXICAL DIPLOMACY.
Mr. Phelps is announced to leave En
gland this week, and it is stated that this
course is taken in order to impress on the
British mind the fact that the Salisbury ad
ministration is rebuked because it does not
send a Minister to Washington. There may
seem to be a certain paradox in the attitude
which first asserted the dignity of the
United States by vacating the British Min
istry here, and then because that post con
tinues vacant revenges the wrong on the
English Cabinet by leaving them without an
American Minister; but such paradoxes
make up the movements of diplomacy.
There is a dangerous tendency in these va
cant diplomatic posts which the dignified
statesmen do not seem to appreciate. After
the ministries at both capitals hare been
left vacant for a time, and both countries
continue to run along as usual, the people
may conclude that these positions can be
permanently vacated, and the gentlemen
who are ambitious to fill these easy and
high-priced situations may lose their chance
of the jobs.
ALASKA'S HAPPY SECLUSION.
At last a really solid inducement has been
held out to Americans to emigrate to arctic
Alaska. An Alaskan paper states that the
result of the last Presi dental election will
not be known to settlers at St. Michaels, the
Sea Islands and along the banks of the
lower Yukon, until the midnight sun has
come and gone next July. This beats the
best record for returns from "West Virginia.
The American citizen who is enjoying the
companionship of polar bears and other
arctic animals on the far Northwestern
coast of Alaska has probably just heard of
the nomination of Messrs. Cleveland and
Harrison. He has before him all the fun
of watching the campaign of education and
lofty ideas, from the safe distance of eight
months in the rear of events.
It is unkind, perhaps, to suggest the
thought, but we must remind General Har
rison that he has not yet heard from all the
counties. Our esteemed fellow citizens in
Alaska's northern shores do not yet know
how to address their little prayers for Presi
dental favor. "When the icebergs meet again
in the dawn of 1890 President Harrison will
know exactly what his devoted admirers in
Kavizagemut and Sesuwaling consider the
proper reward for their polar fidelity.
THE MINERS' DILEMMA.
The river miners do not take very kindly
to the proposition of the reduction in their
wages by about 8 per cent; and consid
ering that they have been subjected
to idleness for several weeks, it is not
altogether strange that they should indulge
in some recalcitration. Possibly some of
the labor leaders who have expressed them
selves favorably to the policy of sustaining
prices by an arbitrary reduction of produc
tion may perceive in this proposition the
real purpose of the agreement to stop min
ing, which went into effect some time ago.
If it had been announced at first that the
closing of the mines was because the mar
kets would not pay at the regular rate of
wages, the question could have been dis
cussed on its merits, and possibly an agree
ment as to wages between the Monongahela
and Kanawha miners might have solved the
difficulty. As it is, the miners are offered
the dilemma between commencing a strike
after several weeks of enforced idleness, or
surrendering to the prospect of reduced
wages and uncertain work.
EDUCATIONAL REFORM.
It is rather interesting, and at the same
time surprising, to find a New York co
temporary jubilantly indorsing the action
of the Board of Education in decreeing that
"the marking system must go out of New
York's public schools," and supporting the
reform with the following arguments: "The
practice of overtaxing the memory and
neglecting to develop other faculties is an
infamous one, particularly as applied to the
young, and the only wonder is that its effects
are not worse than thex are. Competition
fpr 'marks' aggravates it."
"What undesirable embellishments the
most modern educational science may have
added to the marking system, we will not
undertake to say. But, as the marking
system used to be, and probably now is, the !
system of recording the degree of compre
hension of his studies, which the pupil shows
in daily classes, it is a little difficult to
see how the above assertions against it can
be made good. To record that the
student upon recitation showed a per
lect comprehension of the subject
studied; or that he showed that moderate
comprehension which would justify a mark
of seventy-five per cent, or that imperfect
one which only calls for a mark of fifty per
cent, or the total failure to know anything
at all of it which requires a mark of zero,
very plainly has nothing to do with either
overtaxing the memory or producing com
petition. The system of study may overtax
the memory, or the influence of teachers
may produce undue competition; and they
may do exactly the opposite. In either
case the marks have nothing to do with it,
and are simply the record of the result.
It is pertinent to recall the fact that a
general attack has been made upon the sys
tem of examinations to determine the stand
ing of the scholar. That attack was well
founded as against a sole dependence
upon examinations, because in that case
the memory will be overtaxed by the "cram
ming" which inevitably is used to pre
pare for the examinations. The system of
marking or recording the proficiency ob
tained in the daily work of the scholar, if
carried out with decent honesty and good
sense, is the exact opposite of this. It sim
ply shows what each pupil has done, and
can neither make drafts on the memory nor
develop competition for standing, which is
not inherent in the course of study pur
sued. The outcry against the overwork and
competition in the schools may have good
foundation in some cases; butitisveryeasily
overdone. "When the reformers have abol
ished both examinations and marking, they
might as well perfect the work against both
evils, by abolishing recitations, classes and
schools altogether, as the surest way to keep
the scholars' memory from being overtaxed,
and to prevent them from engaging in un
due competition.
WHAT CAN BE DONE.
The treatment of the subject of street rail
ways in Glasgow, as shown by the investi
gations of Prof. Albert Sbaw, of Minneapo
lis, is very different from the course which
has been pursued in this country. That city
owns all the street car tracks and leases
them to a company for a term of years, un
der certain conditions. The element of com
petition secured by the bidding on the lease
has reduced the maximum rate of fares to a
penny, or two cents, and the company pays
a 10 per cent dividend on that rate.
This fully establishes what The Dis
patch has heretofore urged, that by secur
ing the free play of competition in trans
portation over the streets, the rate of fare
charged to the public might be reduced be
low the nickel which is now taken as the
ultimatum of cheapness in this country.
The difference between the fare which the
workingman of Pittsburg must pay and that
which the workingman of Glasgow pays is 3
cents, and in a year, it would be a conserva
tive estimate to say that the extra charge for
himself and family would reach 10. The
levy of that sum on every workingman for
the especial benefit of the watered stock
based on franchises in the public highways
granted by the public liberality, ought to be
sufficiently steep to open the eyes of the
public
The Glasgow policy would probably have
the drawback of making a decided obstacle
to improvements in transit "We doubt if a
city owning all the street car tracks would
be very prompt to adopt improved methods
such as cable lines, electric roads or elevated
railways. It could not be much slower than
Pittsburg has been, which is just putting
cable lines in operation after they have run
successfully in other cities for nearly a de
cade. But such a public ownership of the
old lines would probably have delayed prog
ress in those cities. The example, however,
shows what can be dono by even an indirect
and limited application of competition. If
the obvious methods of securing direct com
petition were adopted there is no question
that a material reduction in charges could be
secured, and good dividends could be earned
on the bona fide investment in the roads.
At all events the practice which Glasgow
has carried out will readily be recognized as
a long way above the recklessness with
which our cities have literally thrown away
immense franchises without any care for
the public.
PBOTECTION TOE POETS.
Poets are constantly in need of protection.
Sometimes it is protection from themselves,
and in this case the public usually demands
protection from them likewise. The poet is a
tender thing, to be guarded, conserved and
gently encouraged. "We refer to the genu
ine article, of course. The poetaster is very
tough. It is painful to hear the wail of a
poet in the prosiac form of a petition for
divorce; but Mr. Earl Marble, of San Fran
cisco, has been constrained to voice his an
guish in this manner. He accuses his wife,
a Bostonian, of mental cruelty and on that
ground seeks to be loosed from her.
Mr. Marble is a poet His sweet songs
on spring and other timely subjects have
perfumed the pages of several magazines, at
the usual munificent rates of five cents a
line, we presume. But of late years Mr.
Marble's wanderings among the parterres
and forcing beds of potry have been
marred and interrupted by the unsympa
thetic annotations of his wife. The poet
relates in his complaint many instances of
the unseemly conduct of his helpmeet She
has been wont to burst in upon him as he
brooded over a villanelle with some such
ejaculation as "rats!" or when he has been
penning the melodious refrain of a ballade
she has asked him in a cold, hard voice,
whether he had duly attended to the
furnace.
Not unnaturally Mr. Marble attributes
the emaciation of his mind to the attacks of
his partner in life. He feels that unless he
is shortly liberated from the married state,
as an incubator of poetic eggs he will be
played out. The relief he prays for he
ought to obtain, unless Mrs. Marble can
show that she acted under the belief, that is
held in some quarters, that the only way to
cure a person of her husband's temperament
is to knock the poetry out of him. It may
be that Mrs. Marble loves her husband but
hates poetry, or that she loves poetry and
her husband too, and has merely en
deavored to curtail the manufacture of
magazine poems by the linear yard. The
case should be attentively watched, any
how, for the revelations regarding a strug
gling native industry are sure to be inter
esting. There is a good deal of ridicule about
the Connecticut "blue laws;" but when one
of them recently was used to clear the city
of New Haven of that class of dingy impos
tors known as fortune tellers, it may be
conceived that some of the cerulean legisla
tion is not worse than the entirely colorless
sort
The Governor of Mississippi is urging
the arrest of the people who kill negroes
and then take possession of their prn-Ttv;
but we do not hear that anyone has been
lodged In jail or any farms restored to the
heirs of the dead negroes.
John M. Thurston, of Nebraska, inti
mates that he can be prevailed upon to sac
rifice himself by taking a Cabinet position.
He says that he will have to give up a $12,
000 position, but he will undergo that loss if
he is called upon to do it. This indicates
Mr. Thurston's conviction that in the Cabi
net he would be worth so much more than
$12,000 a year to his employers, the Pacific
railroads, as will insure him of getting it
back after many days.
Queen Victoria has permitted a modi
fication of the rules relating to the low cut
dresses of ladies attending the spring Draw
ing Booms at Buckingham palace. It will
no longer be necessary to present loyalty
without any covering.
New court and municipal buildings are
to be built in New York and the taxpayers
of that boodle-ridden city are already be
ginning to quake at the prospects of job
bery and corruption. It would pay the
honest citizens of New York to study the
history of the erection of our county build
ings, and to insist upon the methods therein
disclosed being copied by the officials who
will superintend Gotham's improvements.
The Monroe doctrine is getting a great
boom on this continent just now; but it may
be worth while to remember that the doc
trine which proves the most weighty in in
ternational questions, is the one that carries
the heaviest guns.
The report that Evangelist Moody is
holding immense revival meetings in San
Francisco, and that a place accommodating
6,000 people cannot hold all that come, per
mits the hope that after he has converted
enough of the Californians it may not be
quite so easy for the Central Pacific mag
nates to buy United States Senatorships as
it has been heretofore.
The theory that immoral and revolting
plays have got to be represented because the
author wrote them so, argues an ignorance
on the part of the person who advances
this idea that there are plays of healthy and
attractive nature.
It is now heard from the other side in the
"Whistler-Stott encounter that it was Stott
who punched "Whistler, not vice versa as
"Whistler had reported. "Well, since each of
them is satisfied that he licked the other, the
artistic mill must be recognized as the most
successful and satisfactory slugging that the
world has ever enjoyed.
The newest steamers to be added to the
trans-Atlantic fleet are called the Majestic
and the Teutonic. Unaccustomed passen
gers, after they have been at sea about a
day, will think the name shouldbe Emetic.
The recording ot votes for or against the
prohibition amendment the day after it is
passed is another of those legislative
idiosyncrasies that might be amended.
Members who wish to vote on an important
measure should learn the necessity of doing
so when the measure is put upon its passage.
If Mr. Phelps' dignified conduct were to
prove infectious in the State Department it
would be advantageous to the nation. But
Mr. Bayard can hardly do much more mud
dling and truckling before March 4.
TnE string which The Dispatch stated
some time ago was attached to John Wana
maker's European trip has felt a jerk. It
may not have been a very strong jerk, but
it pulled Mr. Wanamaker all the way to
Indianapolis. It does not take much of a
jerk to do that nowadays.
The Congressional resolution prohibiting
the sale o! liquor at the inauguration ball is
a more decided threat against the festivities
of the occasion than all the animadversions
of the clergy.
The decision of the Pennsylvania Su
preme Court that the question whether cider
contains alcohol or not must be decided by
juries, will nerve the average Pennsylvania
juryman with determination to make a
thorough test of it. He will not accept
hearsay evidence, either.
That flag bill in the Legislature is rais
ing rather more fuss than the harmless bit
of buncombe is worth.
There is a good deal that is enterprising
about the New York World's project of
sending to look up Stanley; but what will
the king of African explorers have to say
when he learns that he is to be rescued by
one of the bicycling fellows in a tennis suit?
PERSONAL FACTS AND FANCIES.
Max O'Reix thinks diamonds, not hearts,
are trumps in this country. He doesn't un
derstand tho game.
Three colored men are members of tho
Philadelphia bar Theophilus J. Minton. John
D. Lewis and Jeremiah A Scott They are all
in possession of profitable business.
Marshal Bazaine was reduced to such an
extent that he would gladly have accepted a
shilling had it been offered to him, and would
have sold his very sword in his sore need and
poverty.
The Princess of "Wales is meager in her
millinery. The other day sho was having some
bats made f ofcher daughters, and took her own
material to be made up. She seldom gives
much more than 30s. lor a bonnet
The Emperor of Japan is allowed 52,600,000 a
year for. his household department and his
private fortune is large and increasing. He
thoroughly understands business matters, and
keeps himself well informed as to his invest
ments. Milan OuBENOvrrcn has presented to his
son, the Crown Prince of Servia, the pen with
which he signed the new Constitution. One of
these days the Crown Prince may wonder what
has become of the pen by a stroke cf which his
mother was robbed of her crown.
Mr. Kenhax, the Siberian exmorer and
writer, went on his travels largely for the sake
of his health. "I sailed," he says, "from New
York for San Francisco a pale-faced, gloomy,
morbid boy, only 19 years of age, and weighing
only 120 pounds. Rough, outdoor life so quickly
restored my health that before I had been In
Siberia a year I weighed 156 and could endure
more hardship and privation than half the na
tives." Ktwewa, the new King of Uganda, is a very
different creature from his predecessor, his
brother Mwanga. Kiwewa is a thin, active,
restless man, who liKes his missionary more
highly seasoned than does his brother. He also
differs from Mwanga in that he never kills a
wife before breakfast, being somewhat dys
peptic and not fond of bloodshed before be has
had his coffee and a cigarette. Ho is more
progressive than Mwanga in his attire, and al
ways wears at the very least necklace and an
intelligent expression.
Miss MART Fuller, daughter of the Chief
Justice, will sail for Europe the last of this
month for an indefinite stay. She has made a
sensation in "Washington by her toilets. She
'wears no modern costumes for evening dress.
Sho copies the style of the Directory or affects
the short, belted waist and puffed sleeve of the
Empire. At the White House recently she
wore an odd little dress of lime. Holand's
period. It was of bright canary-satin, and the
short waist scarcely reached below the armpits,
the back of the straight skirt falling from this
ill two broad plaits. It had short, puffed
sleeves, high on the .shoulders, and a square
: ncker of mull filled in the neck. J
THE TOPICAL TALKEE.
Small Lota of Gossip for Homo Consumption
at Your Leisure.
There is a young Alleghenian he will not
be 21 for 15 years yet who is wont to set up a
howl whenever the hour for bathing arrives.
Next door the house is full of children, but
they are singularly quiet and sweet-tempered.
The father of the young gentleman first men
tioned was commenting on this fact to his wife
last nlgnt,
"Blank's children never cry," he said.
Tho youngster, who was present thereupon
said with considerable emphasis: "That's all
right pop; but they haven't a bath tub next
door!"
V
IIackmen, even in Pittsburg, are sometimes
f ound who want the earth. '
Here's a case which seems to have escaped
chronicling somehow: An old lady staying at
tho Monongahela House very recently had to
leave very early in the morning to catch a P.
& W. train. She chartered a two-horse hack
to take her to the depot. When she reached
her destination sho offered the driver $1 60
surely enough but he demanded $5. The tram
was about to start, and the old lady, though
she objected to being robbed, was about to
yield in order to reach the cars, when a well
known Pittsburger, who happened to have
overheard tho demands of tho hack driver,
interfered.
When he had ascertained the facts he told
the old lady that she had two alternatives be
fore her either to pay the $5 and catch the
train, or return to Pittsburg, make a charge
against the hackman and lose the train. The
gentleman, who had also intended to leave on
that train, offered to stay with the old lady and
see her through. She decided to stay. The
hackman was hauled up before a Pittsburg
Alderman and fined.
How this extremely edifying story was kept
from publication I cannot teU. But it ought to
be profitable reading to tho public and the
hackmen.
V
The illness of Miss Fanny Davenport is not
extraordinary, in view of the very heavy work
which she does in "La Tosca." Whatever may
be one's opinion of the play and Miss Daven
port's acting, there Is no disguising the fact
that sho really devotes an immense amount of
physical force to tho portrayal of Florid Tosca.
Miss Davenport, by the way, throws herself
about whenever a chance occurs in the play.
Her final performance on the ramparts Is real
ly extraordinary. When the Boldiers fire upon
her she does not, as Sara Bernhadt did, and as
I understand Sardou indlcatedln his stage di
rections the heroine should do, jump from the
parapet into the castle's moat, but staggers
instead and then rolls over and over down the
sloping platform to the center of the stage.
However she may guard herself in this exploit,
thee5ctof rolling headlong down a board
walk must bo very trying to so stout a woman
as Miss Davenport
V
Max O'Rell says that he was astonished at
the quantity of diamonds worn by women of
all classes, from the wives of millionaires to
maids of all work, and adds that imitation
diamonds are more often met with than the
real stones. This is strange, coming from a
Frenchman. Parisian women are noted for
their devotion to iewclry of all kinds, dia
monds being particularly sought after, and tho
imitation stones to be found in the Palais
Royal shops are worn profusely by the lower
classes of French women everywhere.
Another new theater is promised to suffer
ing Pittsburg. But really, if promises are liko
pie crust, isn't it about time for some of these
magnificent projectors of first-class playhouses
to give the publio a little bit of the pie? If they
can't do that they might give us a rest
"The activity in real estate just now is re
markable," said a Fourth avenue broker yester
day. "Yes," said an impecunious person present
"I have a bit of real estate I'd liko to sell, but
the surroundings are so dull that no living man
seems to want it"
"Where is it?" asked the broker, briskly.
"In Allegheny Cemetery a half a lot."
A FEATURE OF THE INAUGURAL.
South enrolled Colored Troops Will
be
Present on That Occasion.
Special Telegram to the Dispatch.
Charleston, S. C, January 23. A distinc
tive featuro of the coming inauguration of
President Harrison will be furnished from this
city. Arrangements are making to send to
Washington on March 4 a picked company of
the militia of this city under the command of
General W. S. Lee, who commands the First
Brigade North Carolina State Cavalry, and
who is the only colored brigadier in the United
States.
General Lee is a light-colored mulatto, and
was at one time Speaker of the House- of
Representatives of South Carolina. Charleston
has the largest body of colored troops of any
city in tho Union. There are two regiments of
infantry and five cavalry companies, all uni
formed and equipped. They were represented
at Cleveland's inauguration by the South
Carolina Volunteers, one of tho finest com
panies in the brigade.
THE PERFCTI0N OF DISCRIMINATION.
The Judgment of Tho Dispatch In tho
Selection of News Complimented.
From the Canton News Democrat. 1
The Dispatch is among tho highest repre
sentatives of American journalism. Its marked
feature is that it is never behind in anything,
and the judgment exercised in selection of
news may be properly styled' the perfection of
discrimination. The civilized world appears to
be its field, and it is covered every day, so that
when a reader of TnE dispatch lays the
journal down ho feels that be has been accu
rately posted for tho day upon all current
events. .
A PRIZE FOR AUTHORS.
Mrs.
Chnnlcr Will Give One for tho Beat
Essny on Child Labor.
Baltimore, January 23. Mrs. Amelie Rives
Chanler has offered a prize of $100 for the best
American essay on child labor. The money has
been placed in the hands of Prof. Richard Ely,
of this city, Secretary of the American
Economic Association, and was received by
Mrs. Chanler for some sonnets on the subject.
The essay must not exceed 25,000 words, and
must be in Prof. Ely's hands not later than
December 2, 1S89.
A Pointer for tho Girls.
From the Philadelphia Times.
A pointer for American heiresses: Before
marrying a foreign lord try to find out whether
he isn't only an ordinary scoundrel.
Language of tho Senate Restaurant.
From the Boston Herald. 1
In the United States Senate restaurant "One
Grover" means a plate of sonp.
DEATHS OP A DAY.
n. Lnwrcnco Snnford.
BpeelalTelejrram to the Dispatch.
Erie, January 23. H. Lawrence Banford, ol
Erie, died to-day in Riverside, Cat Deceased was
an heir to a very large estate recently, and was a
young man of rare promise. He was recently
stricken with an ailment, and had gone to Cali
fornia for relief. Deceased was a son of the vet
eran hanker, Myron H. Sanford, and is widely
connected In Pittsburg and vicinity.
Thomas Cartin.
Mr. Thomas Curtln, for 45 years a resident of
the Eighth ward, died at his residence on Mercer
street yesterday, aged 63 years. Mr. Curtin was
formerly a river man. and had acquired considerable-wealth.
He was highly respected by a large
circle of acquaintances.
THEATRICAL NOTES.
This Hanlons "New Fantasma," a spectacu
lar play with elaborate scenery and 60 people
in the cast, will be at the Grand Opera House
next week. Tho box office opens this morning
for the sale ot seats for this engagement '
"The Two Johns," an irresistibly funny
comedy, as all regular theater-goers well know,
will be the attraction at the Bijou next week
The advance sale of seats begins to-day.
The Academy of Music is too small to ac
commodate all who are anxious to see the per
formance of the Rentz-Santley Company.
"Romany Rye" is drawing immensely at
Harris' Theater. Next week, "A Cold Day."
Many new attractions are promised by the
Casino at an early date.
WASHBURN WINS THE FIGHT.
He Receives a Large Majority. Notwith
standing Many Vigorous Protests.
St. Paul, January 23. The Committee on
Investigation camo in promptly on timo and
presented their report. It states that several
persons were offered money, or other things of
value, by overzealous friends of the several
candidates, but that there is no evidence in
any way whatever implicating either General
Washburn or Senator Cabin. Mr. Lane called
for the reading of the testimony to the House,
and active debate was aroused by his motion.
Mr. Ives thought the House ought to know tho
inside of tho Republican caucus. Others
thought tho committee had judiciary powers
and their report should bo accepted as final.
The motion to hear the testimony was lost.
On motion the joint session then proceeded
to vote viva voce for United States Senator, the
joint ballot resulting; W. D. Washburn, 107;
E. W. Durant, 20; E. M. Wilson. 2; C. M. Start
9; John P. Rea, 1: Thomas Bowen, 1; M. E.
Clapp, 1. A great many explained their votes,
especially the few bolters from the caucus.
The vote was concluded and announced at 1:10
o'clock. During tho vote a thrilling scene was
enacted when Representative Smith announced
his vote. He spoke briefly, but in the most
scathing terms of Senator Hixon, whom he
mentioned by name, that gentleman having
taken occasion in explaining his vote openly to
saythat Washburn had secured the caucus
nomination by improper means.
The denunciation, which was most bitter and
cutting, was received in dead silence, and
members leaned forward to find the cause of
the speech to see how he was taking it. Sena
tor Hixon made no response, and may have left
the hall. The Speakerannounced tho result of
the ballot and declared General Washburn
elected United States Senator.
INJUNCTIONS AGAINST GRAYITAT0N.
The County Attorney Says the Chicago Court
Would Grant Ono Chenp.
Chicago, January 23. A demurrer has been
filed by the County Attorney for the Board of
County Commissioners to the suit of Edward
A. Stevens to restrain tho board from contract
ing with the training school for boys at Foehan
ville, because tho constitution says that no
money shall bo paid to a religions institution.
The ground of the commissioners' demurrer is
that they cannot be enjoined from executing a
contract, whatever the courts may have power
to do as to enjoining tho county from paying
money.
The County Attorney also criticises the free
dom of master in chancery in recommending
injunctions. He says that on the receipt of $5
they would recommend an injunction against
the law of gravitation. He claims the prelim
inary injunction against the commissioners was
promaturely issued.
RELICS FOR THE CENTENNIAL.
Tho Arch Under Which General Washington
Passed Will be Exhibited.
New York, January 23. General Wm. S.
Striker, of New Jersey, has written to Secre
tary Bowen, of the Committee on the Centen
nial of the Inauguration of President Wash
ington, saying that an arch erected by the
ladies of Trenton and under which Washing
ton passed on the way to the inauguration, and
under which Lafayette passed when he visited
this country in 1824, is now in possession of tho
wife of the Hon. Caleb S. Green, of Trenton,
who also has the letter of thanks which Wash
ington wrote to the Trenton ladies.
It is now m Indepeudence Hall on exhibi
tion, and will be returned to Trenton in time
for the centennial services. The committee is
anxious to get one of the fans presented to the
ladies present at the first inauguration ball.
DEVASTATED BY DIPHTHERIA.
Frightful mortality In Berks and Lehigh
Counties Undertakers Bnsy.
Reading, January 23. There is no abate
ment of the terrible scourge of diphtheria In
Eastern Berks and along the borders of Lo
high county. In some sections as many as half
a dozen children have been taken from a single
family, and the young victims thus far number
over 100. Adults also are carried off with such
remarkable suddenness that the doctors are
astounded. Thirty-two adults have died this
month and there is no abatement.
Doublo and triple funerals are of common oc
currence, two and three children placed in a
single coffin and buried in one gravo being
affairs of almost every day
The scourge extends for 20 miles and is worse
along low streams of water. Many cases of
destitution are reported.
PARALYZED AT HIS POST.
Representative Burnes, of Missouri, Seized
With Parnlysls in the nails of Congress.
Washington, January 23. Representative
James N. Burnes, of Missouri, was seized with
an attack of paralysis this afternoon in the
House during tho consideration of the sundry
service Dill. He was removed to his hotel in
the police ambulance. His condition is very
critical. His entire left sido is completely par
alyzed, and while he is perfectly conscious, his
condition Is indeed alarming. Even if he could
survive the present attack, there is imminent
danger of others following, and in that event
the chances of recovery would be very slight
indeed.
FIRST COME, LAST SERVED,
Senator Quny Won't bo Bothered by Office
Seekers Until May 4.
Washington, January 23. Senator Quay
left to-day for Florida to bo absent until the
latter part of February. Ho desired the an
nouncement made that ho would oppose the
appointment to office of any man who applied
to him for assistance prior to May 4.
A Dcllcnto Task.
From the New York World.
J. L. Babcock, of Ann Arbor, Mich., who is to
receive $600,000 from his uncle's estato if ho
marries soon, intends to select his wife by aid
of a competitive examination. The committee
in chargo of tho contest has a very delicate
task to perform. Not since Paris was called
upon to award the golden apple to tho fairest
of the threo goddesses, Juno, Minerva and
Venus, has a competition of this kind attracted
so much attention. The committee will be in
fine condition after tho defeated aspirants have
finished their revenge.
Tho Champion ITeavy Man Dies.
JSrKCIAI. TELKGKAH TO THE DtSVATCIt.l
Massillon, January 23. Billy Kurtz,
claimed to be tho heaviest man In Ohio, died
on his farm, near here, this afternoon, of drop
sy, aged 45 years. Tho average weight of de
ceased was 4G5 pounds, while the avoirdupois of
two brothers and two sisters added made a
total of 1,411 pounds for tho quintet.
" Mrs. Cleveland's Popularity.
From the London Globe.
A
Tho popularity ot Mrs. Cleveland Is a real
bulwark to the President. There was some
good sense in tho gentleman who. being charged
by a rampageous bull, held his wife firmly in
front saying: "Stand steady, Maria; he can't
toss both of us."
The Energy of Talk.
From the Chicago News.
It is estimated that tho energy displayed by
members of Congress in talking on the tariff
during the last four months if applied properly
would have been sufficient to lift the national
debt
ANCIENT ADVERTISING.
It Is affirmed that the first newspaper adver
tisement appeared in 1642, during the civil war
in Great Britain.
In mediaeval times itwas the public crier who
went abroad enumerating the goods that a cer
tain merchant had for sale.
In Greece it was the public crier who an-nouti-ed
sales or bid the people come to the
theater or visit the public baths.
In England the first printed advertisement
was gotten up by Caxton, the celebrated
printer, who announced the completion of "The
Pyes of Salisbury," a book 'containing a collec
tion of rules for the guidance of priests in tho
celebration of Easter.
The advertising card is of entirely modern
origin, although the Egyptians, Greeks and
Romans knew something about advertising.
They accomplished the desired result through
tho medium of posters, as several bills, painted
in black and red, were found on the walls of
the Pompeiian dwellings.
The first authentic advertisement was pub
lished in the Mercuriut Politicus of 1652. In
the year 1657 a weekly newspaper devoted to
the interests of advertisers made its apnearance
in London. It was not until the eigtheenth cen
tury that newspaper advertising became the
recognized medium between the manufacturer
and the buyer.
AT THE SOCIAL SHRINE.
Mrs. E. M. Ferguson's Delightful Reception
and Other Events.
The carriage-crowded drive before Mrs. E.
M. Ferguson's 'mansion in the,East End, yes
terday afternoon, certainly testified to that
lady's popularity as an entertainer, and the i
o'clock tea that she gave well sustained that
reputation. Prominent society people of both
cities were present, and. in addition to their
hostess, were received by the Mesdames James
W. Brown, Henry C. Buffum, George "W.
Dnvey, William H Frew, Henry H. Cain and
J. H. McClellan; also the Misses McClellan,
Montgomery, Mackintosh and Carrie Hays.
ineauair was in honor of Miss Ferguson, a
visiting sister of Mr. E. M. Ferguson. The floral
decorations were furnished by B. A. Elliot,
while Kuhn, the caterer, furnished the tea for
100 covers..The guests left at 6, having passed a
most enjoyable afternoon.
A Nice Supper nnd Donee.
A very pretty entertainment was given at
Sterrett'g Hall in Homewood, by the East End
German yesterday evening. The attendance
was fairly good, considering the state of the
roads. The features of the affair were a nice
supper and dance, the latter being carried on
until an early hour.
Their Second Reception.
The second annual entertainment of Good
Will Council, Order of Chosen Friends, was
given last evening at Cyclorama Hall, Alle
gheny. About 150 couples were present and
danced from 8 to 2 o'clock. The music was
furnished by Gernert & Guenthcr and Luther
was the caterer.
In Honor of Miss Mary Gregg.
Mrs. Dr. W. J. Holland, of Oakland, gave a
charming little luncheon to a few friends yes
terday afternoon, in honor of Miss Mary Gregg,
an eastern visitor of Miss Mary McKee, of
Oakland. Caterer Kuhn set the table, and
altogether it was a most enjoyable affair, last
ing from 1 until 5.
A Plensant Birthday Party.
Mr. Jacob Auienbacher, Jr., of Eighteenth
and Carson streets, Southside, celebrated his
thirty-fourth birthday last evening. About 30
friends were present and passed a pleasant
evening. Mr. Auienbacher was serenaded by
the Germania Band and the Odd Fellows' Lte
dertafeL Ilclbiing Heyl.
Mr. Lawrence Heyl, the Liberty street tobac
conist and Miss Theresa Helbling, daughter of
Joseph Helbling, of Lawrenceville, were mar
ried yesterday at St. Augustine's Church, in
tho presence of many friends.
A Ten Party for the Church.
Salisbury Hall, Southside, was crowded to
the doors last night on account of a tea party
which was given for tho benefit of the Holy
Cross Church, at South Thirty-first street.
Knights Templar Monthly Treat.
The members of Pittsburg Commandery No.
1, Knights Templar, held their usual monthly
entertainment at the Central Turner Hall last
night.
Entertained by Mrs. Singer.
Mrs. George Singer yesterday entertained a
number of her friends in a delightful manner
at her residence. Point Breeze.
A NEW INDUSTRY IN SWEDEN.
Tho Extraction of Oil From Wood Becom
ing an Important Branch of Trade.
The Stockholm correspondent of the Glasgow
Mail mentions that a new industry has sprung
up in Sweden, which consists in the extraction
of oil from wood. It appears that this industry
is becoming every year a more important
branch of Swedish trade. Tho portions of tim
ber and plants which used to be considered
valueless are now utilized. After being sub
jected to various processes, they yield not only
oil, but turpentine, creosote, acetic acid, char
coal and pitch. It appears that the ligneous
oil produced in Sweden cannot be burned in
ordinary lamps, owing to the quantity of smoke
it throws off, but has to be used in specially
constructed lamps similar to what are em
ployed for photogen. It costs about 55 centimes
per litre, is not explosive and burns much
longer than photogen. There are at present 30
manufactories for turning out this substance
in Sweden, so rapidly has the industry devel
oped, and the annual production is about 40,000
litres.
TO REIMBURSE HIS HEIRS.
4
Tho Government Will Appropriate 8300,000
to Pay for Captain Ends' Work.
Washington, January 23. The Appropria
tion Committee of tho House has decided to
offer amendments to tho sundry civil appro
priation bill, now under consideration by the
House, appropriating $500,000 to reimburse the
heirs of Captain Eads for improvements made
in the channel of the Mississippi river at South
Pass, and allowing $150,000 for the continuance
of the work of surveying and locating sites for
irrigating the arid lands of the West
SHOULD HAVE BEEN PROTECTED.
Louis C. Schilling Complains of the Depart
ment of State.
Washington, January 23. Louis C. Schill
ing, whose case at ono timo caused considera
ble interest -both in the United States and
Mexico, has presented a petition to the Senate
through Senator Spooner, in which ho makes
complaint against the Department of Btate for
not, as ho alleges, affording him the protection
due an American citizen.
A Problem.
From a Montana Exchange.
A rather strange affliction happened to a
Missoula couple who were sleigh riding. The
young man's right ear and the lady's left ear
were frosted, while tho other two wero not cold
at all. Why all four ears were not frosted is a
problem which has been submitted to the high
school class in physiology.
Sensation In Washington.
From the Chicago News.!
Washington, a city of some thousands of
souls and numerous politicians, has lately been
shaken by a great sensation. A family has
moved there with the avowed intention of re
siding permanently.
Eruptions and Corruptions.
From the New York World. J
Kilanea, the Sandwich Island volcano, i3
again displaying pernicious activity. That part
of the world seems to depend upon eruptions
and corruptions to gain notoriety.
WAITIN'FER TnE CAT TO DIE.
Lawzy? don't 1 rlckollect
'ili.it 'ere old swing in the lane!
Right and proper, I expect.
Old times can't come back again;
Bat I want to state, ef they
Could come back, and I could say
What my plcjc nd be, 'yjingl
I'd say, Olmme the old swing
'Nunder the old locust trees
On the old place, ef you please,
Dauglln' there with half-shet eye,
Waltin' fer the cat to dlel
I'd say, Gimme the old gang
Of barefooted, hungry, lean,
Or'n'ry boys you want to hang
When you're growed up twicct as mean!
The old gyarden patch, the old
Truants, and the stuff we stoledl
The old stompln'-groun', where we
Wore the grass off, wild and free
As the swoop of the old swing,
Where we uset to climb and cling.
And twist roun', and fight, and lie
Waltin' fer the cat to die!
'Pears like I 'most alius could
Swing the highest of the crowd
Jcs sail up there tel I stood
Downside up, and screech out loud,
Ketch my breath, and jes drap back
Fer to let the old swing slack,
Ylt my tow-head dlppln' still
In the green boughs, and the chill
Up my backbone taperln' down,
With my shadder on the groun'
Slow and slower trailin' by
Waltin' fer the cat to dlel
Now my daughter's little Jane's
Got a kind o' baby swing
On the porch, so's when It rains
She kin play there-little thing I
And I'd limped out t'other day
"With my old cheer thls-a-way,
Bwingln' her and rockln' too,
Tbinkln how I uset to do
At her age. when suddenly,
"Hey, gran'pap!" she says to me,
Why you rock-so slow?'" Says I,
Waltin' fer the eat to die!"
Jamil WMtcomo Hlley, inHarptrf Magazine
for 1'ebruary.
ODD PHASES OP CITY LITE.
Rare Collection of Shakespearean Carlos.
tNlEW TOBK BUREAU SPECIALS.
New York, January 23. Dr. J. O.'Haniwell
FhllUps,an English collector of Shakespearean
curios, who has just died, bequeathed his whole
collection to the Shakespeare Society of New
York. Dr. Halliwell Phillips devoted 42 years
of his Ufa collecting and studying relics of
Shakespeare and his times. He published the
results of his studies in 300 volumes. Copies of
these volumes and a vast deal of original man
uscript will bo shipped to the society shortly.
Dr. Phillips thought that New York promised
to be the future center of Shakespearean research.
Wnllack's Btogo Clothes on View.
The theatrical wardrobe of. Lester Wallack,
the dead actor, was exhibited at anan!tlon
room to-day, preparatory to itasale next Fri
day morning. It contains about every kind of
costume that an actor can wear on the stage.
All sorts of cloaks, trousers and waistcoats,
gold-embroidered and gold-bespangled, appro
priate for all plays from "School" to "Much
Ado About Nothing,'' are beingtumbled about
on the auctioneer's counters by curious mem
bers of tho profession. The swords and daggers
used by Mr. Wallack in "Faint Heart," "As
You Like It" and "Diplomacy" are also In the
collection. Tha swords with which James
Wallack fought in "Rienzi"and "Richard IH."
form a separate lot of relics. Fifty canes,
which were given to Lester Wallack by friends,
will also be sold.
Wrecked by Politics.
Richard Croker, the great Tammany chief
tain, is breaking down physically. His physi
cians have told him he muStgo South and keep
from politicians. Mr. Croker worked tremen
dously hard last fall to get Mr. Hewitt out of
office, and to get Mayor Grant in. After the
election of Mayor Grant, tho Tammany poli
ticians got to quarreling bitterly over tho
spoils, and Mr. Croker had to work harder than
ever to make peace among them. Four months
of these exertions have worn out his nervous
system. Tammany men are puzzled to know
they can keep their grip on the city offices
without the help ot Mr. Croker as Fire Com
sioner. Freddie Nervous Last Monday Eve.
Freddie Gebhardt was in a terrible state of
mind last Monday night when Mrs. Langtry
made her debut as Lady Macbeth. He sat
quite still on a stool behind the scenes until
the play was half done. Then he hurried
around behind the curtain and in the boxes,
asking everyone ha knew whether the Lily was
a success in her new role.
Crosby Mny Spoil the Fan.
The Rev. Howard Crosby thinks he can stop
some of the fun at the big French ball in the
Metropolitan Opera House next Tuesday
night. In a long affidavit, which he will show
to the Supreme Court he tella what high jinks
havo resulted from the sale of champagne after
midnight at the French balls. He wishes the
court to keep the dancers at the ball next Tues
day from drinking wine aftei 12 o'clock. Tho
police say they are ready to do Dr. Crosby's
bidding if the Supremo Court will give them
a mandamus.
A Novel Oil Ship.
The first steel tank bark ever built for the
oil trade sailed from here to-day for Havre,
with 12 tanks full of oil. Her name is Ville de
Dieppe. She is 231 feet long, 22 feet deep and
has a registered tonnage ot 2,000. She is
lighted exclusively by electricity to avoid all
danger of fire.
Controversy Over a Corpse.
The body of Lieutenant Miles, of the steam
ship Yantic, who died several days ago of yel
low fever, remains unburied at quarantine.
The Board of Health wishes to bury it here.
The Miles family wish to bury it in Virginia.
Before the body can be transported to Vlr
ginia, Boards of Health in all States through
which it must pass must grant formal permits
and the health authorities must givo a burial
permit. All this red tape is considered un
necessary by the Miles family, as the metallic
coffin in which the body He3 is air tight
Could Not Face the Executioner.
Theodore Wehl was shot in the abdomen
yes terday by a friend "whose name he refused
to give. He said the shooting was an accident.
To-day he died. Shortly before his death, Paul
Cohas, a cigarmaker, shot himself in the left
breast at his lodgings. He"was taken to a hos
pital to die. His room mate told tho police
that Cohas planned to shoot himself early this
morning when he read that Wehl could not
'live. Cohas said to his chum: "I am the man
who shot Theodore Wehl in tho abdomen yes
terday. I see by the papers ha will die. The
detectives are after me and I will kill myself.
Wehl and I quarreled over 50 cents at cards and
I shot him."
Pnrsncd by an Abused Woman.
William Mayer's wife has got nim into a bad
tangle with the police here by coming all the
way from Lcipsic, Germany, to tell about his
misdeeds in the old country. She married him
eight years ago. They lived happily until her
father died, leaving her about (2,000. He then
made her life miserable by constantly teasing
her for money. Finally she gave him the whole
82,000. He got terribly drunk and ran away to
America. She supported her six children by
washing and begging. Eventually she got to
gether money enough to pay her passage to
America. She arrived threo days ago. A de
tective helped her find Mr. Mayer,. who swore
profanely that he never saw her or her $2,000.
Finally he acknowledged she was his wife. He
refused to support her, howover, although ho
is well-to-do, and advised tha commissioners at
Castle Garden to send her back to Germany as
a pauper.
A Lively Timo at a Dnncc.
Billy McGlory's big opening ball was almost
broken up early this morning by a young man
who said he was a blizzard and a cowboy. In
fact he was William Dean, of Jersey City, and
very drunk. At 4 o'clock young Dean darted
to the, middlo of the ball room in the midst of
a waltz, shouted that It was bed time, and then
began shooting at the big chandelier above
him, with a 42-caIiber revolver. All the dancers
and cake-walkers tumbled out of doors and the
waiters got behind the bar. Two bouncers
tried to eject young Dean without taking hold
of him, but failed. Two policemen, however,
lugged him off, after he had emptied his re
volver, and the ball proceeded. McGlory's
dive was closed last year by Mayor Hewitt.
Everyone is wondering to-day what Mayor
Grant will do about it.
A Rich Woman's Escapade.
Mrs. Maria Mascapetti, wife of a rich Hobo
ken wine merchant, made a big rumpus in a
Hoboken theater last evening by smoking a
cigarette during the play. A man tried to stop
her. She slapped his face and called him
names. An usher made an equally bad job of
quieting her. A policeman removed her from
the theater. She will be tried for disorderly
conduct to-morrow.
Suffocated by Coal Gas.
Last night Daniel Desmond and John Walsh
were suffocated in their bunks on the steam
ship Holbert by gas from an old coal stove.
Both were breathing faintly when the mate
opened the door this morning. They died, how
ever, before a doctor arrived.
Poisoned In a Barroom.
Some time ago youngAlbert Swatz was given
a glass of sulphuric acid instead of soda water
at Schmidt's saloon, in Newark. He died the
same night. The Coroner's jury returned a
verdict of criminal neglect on the part of
Schmidt and recommends the passage of a law
forbidding saloon keepers to keeppoison3 be
hind their bars.
Penny Wise and Pound Foolish.
From the Chicago lnter-Ocean.1
England fo-day pays a total of $4,000,000 in
subsidies, and by thatmeansshe gets $365,000,000
of the $065,000,000 paid for the carrying trade of
the world. There is such a thing in America
as being "penny wise and pound loollsb," and
the question of "subsidies" for the great carry
ing trade of the world and the decision of
American statesmen upon it puts us on the
"penny-' side.
Killed tho Business.
From the Burlington Free.l'ress.
An Indiana court has decided that unless a
woman is pleased with her photographs she
need not pay for them. Since this daclsion was
rendered 45 photographers have spilled their
chemicals out of the window and left the State. J
CUEIODS COBDEKSATIOSS.
Of 26,000 criminals arrested in Paris,
16,000 had not attained the age of 20.
In Rome there are 30 cardinals, 35 bish
ops, 1,469 priests, 2,215 nuns and 3,000 monks,
friars, candidates, etc
A San Francisco court granted a di
vorce last week within less than 21 hours after
the application had been filed.
On one of the foggy days in London last
week, the output of ono of tha gas companies
there was 105,016,000 cubic feet of gas.
A California clergyman lately went
crazy while preaching, and descending from
the pnlprt threw books and chairs among tho
congregation.
A Chinese paper tells of a monkey that
extinguished a fire by emptying the contents of
a teapot on tha flames, which were, rapidly con
BumiBgasnrtajn, -The Pacific road3 are using a rotary
snow plow this winter which will eat its way
through a drift 15 feet thick and half a mile
long in 20 minutes.
The cattle in South Florida are said to
bo starving, the flat woods being so covered
with water that it was almost impossible for
the animals to get food.
Almost all the Paris theaters are
lighted by electricity, and by tho time tha Ex
position opens it is hoped to have the system
installed in tho remainder.
Last year 15 Chinamen were married in
Queensland one to a native of the colony, one
to a Victorian native, two to Scotch women,
three to Irish women and eight to English
women.
A man in New York City has fitted
himself for an expert witness on chirograpby,
and once having seen a man's signature he can
identify it again if simply shown one single let
ter of the name.
There was an exciting battle at Pierce,
Iowa, the other day between an owl and a largo
shepherd do the bird coming off victorious.
Another bout was then arranged between tha
victor and a brindla bull pup; and again tho
owl was the winner.
Last week there was an enormous catch
of sardines off Boulogne, France. They have
been selling at 5d per 1,000, and immense quan
tities have been used as manure, as the curing
establishments have been totally inadequate to
cope with the enormous supply.
A peculiar story comes from Banner,
Neb. A new town called Harrisburg has
grown up in the same county, and recently an
enterprising citizen of the latter town went to
Banner, loaded the postoffice on his wagon,
and carried it triumphantly to Harrisburg.
Banner succeeded in recovering it after a
struggle.
The waters of nearly all the hot springs
in Black Rock region, Nevada, are so strongly
impregnated with mineral matter, that .they
will petrify vegetable or animal matter in a few
years. One enterprising genius has the bodies
of three Indians in soak, and when they ara
converted into stone he expects to make a for
tune exhibiting them.
Tho number of paupers in London in
the last week in December, exclusive of luna
tics in asylums and vagrants, was 100,315, as
compared with 104,097 on the corresponding day
of the previous year. 03,611 in 1S86, and 94,902 in
1SS3. The vagrants relieved in the metropolis
on the last Saturday of December numbered
1.156, of whom 949 were men, 170 women and 37
children under 16 years of age.
There is a company in Birmingham,
England, that makes about 10,000.000 of pma
every day, the weight averaging five tons per
week. Tho company are in possession, as pro
prietors, of tho privileges and rights of tho
original patentee of tho solid-headed pin.
There are at least two other extensive pin
manufacturers in Birmingham, where it is said
that half the pins used in the world are made.
An old fellow in a Wisconsin town who
has been running a private bank for some years
was recently requested to publish some sort of
a statement. So he posted the following on
the door of his bank:
"Notice. This 'ere bank has got 550,000 be
hind her. She don't owe nobody a cussed cent.
Good paper discounted, as heretofore, and
nobody proposes to cat sticks for Mexico or
Canada.'1
The immigration that has poured into
Southern and Western Florida has made it a
white man's land, wealthy and prosperous.
While the 10,200 negroes south of St Augustine
had grown from 1S70 to 1S80 to 16,900, the 17,300
whites had grown to 15,800 and aro nearly 70,000
to-day. In that section of the State the races
wero nearly eqnal 18 years ago; the whites are
lour to one to-nay, ana in a nnmDer oi tno
counties the negro population has actually de
creased. A Chicago woman suffered so terribly
from tight shoes while at the theater that at
the end of the first act, she took the advice of
her husband and removed the footgear. After
that she was in clover until the performance
was over. Then she almost fainted to find that
her feet had so swelled that the shoes would
littlo more than go over the toes. Her husband,
however, again came to tho rescne, and sug
gested that she wrap the shoes in tha pro
gramme and walk home only about half a
block distant in hor stocking feet She fol
lowed his advice, but the chill which shot
through her body when she stepped on the
cold pavement prompted her to resolve
never again to go shoeless during the winter,
even if she has to remain in a theater for a
week.
The life of Mme. Peynaud, the French
woman, who died a few days ago near Catons
ville, Md., where for years she occupied, with
cats, dogs and birds, an old hut, is told of as
follows in Baltimore papers: Sho formerly
lived in Paris, her hnsband was a barber, and
upon his death be left her a recipe for beauti
fying the complexion. She started an estab
lishment, but, trade not being brisk, she
'adopted a new plan. She advertised exten
sively, promising astonishing results. When
her victims came she charged them large
prices for the lotion. The lotion, however,
brought out ugliness and blotches instead of
beauty, and she then demanded exorbitant
prices for removing theso blotches. She made
a great deal of money, but in 1875 she was ar
rested, tried and convicted. She managed to
escape to New York, where she lived quietly
for a time. Remorse overcame her. and she
consulted a clergyman. He counseled penance.
She therefore went to Maryland, bought an old
building in a secluded spot, and began the Ufa
of a recluse.
TAKEN FROM LIFE.
Beastly Weather.
When it rains cats
and dog3.
Never call a big man a liar. He'd prob
ably feel worse than a smaller man.
The Flying Dutchman would probably ba
Bismarck If the wishes of the ex-Empress were
consulted.
Scene: Grammar Class Teacher What
is the future of "He drinks?"
Johnny (after considerable thought) "He K
drunk."
Most Unfortunate. Simpson (tremulous
ly) Emma, darling, say yes, and there will be
another
Newsboy (outside) Big breach of promise easel
Extra I
Near Relatives "We are related, I be
lieve," said the Earthquake to the Case ot Ague.
'I think so, though we have never met before,"
replied the Case of Ague.
"Shake!" both exclaimed, simultaneously.
Cold Days for Art Beethoven Voa
HInkensplel (trombonist of street band) Mein
goodness, Herr Conductor, can't you head ns
aroundt de obbosltewayr Dot December wind
blows all the music down mein throat!
A Doubtful Future. Minister (at din
ner, to Bobby) I suppose, Bobby, you want to
grow up to be a good and useful member of so
ciety? Bobby Oh, yes I I want to be in the best so
ciety, but I don't b'lieve that I can get there. Pa
and ma never could.
The New Shade. Aunt (who is enter
taining Miss Breezy, of Chicago)-That Is a beau
tiful dress you have on, Ueraldlne. and the shade
6eems to be quite new.
Miss Breeiy (complacently) Yes; it Is a new
Chicago shade, called the "pig's snore."
A Delicate Insinuation. "What do you
think of the modern style of writing paper?'
asked Cora. "Do yon like it as well as the old?"
"I'm afraid I am not competent to form an
opinion." replied ilerrltt. "1 should Judge that
a great deal can be said on both sides."
Free Medical Advice. "Doctor," said a
citizen as he overtook him on the street, what
do you do in a case of gone stomach?' '
"Well," replied the doctor, thoughtfully, "I'to
neverhadsucnacase myself; but I would recom
mend you to advertise for it and then sit down in
a large easy chair and wait until somebody brings
it back."
The Wrong House. Tramp (thinking to
obtain sympathy) I say. Mum. I ain't got no
where that I kin call a home, and I ain't eat
nutbln' all day. Would you mind it. Mum, if I
slep' lu the snow here until mornln'r
Lady of the house (who knows 'em) No, I ain't
got any objections. Yon can drop down there
anywhere; only remember, that as 1 don't charge
you anything for your lodgln', I shall expeC yon
to shovel the snow away from the house in the
morn in'.
-All from LW.