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PITTSBURG. TUESDAY. JAN. 1, 1889.
f TWELVE PAGES
I THE OLD AHD HEW YEARS.
?' The world last night took its farewell of
1888, and this morning extends a cordial
t -welcome to 1889. The Old Year was not a
bad one. It had many good points, and
leaves ns more prosperous, richer and, let
us hope, wiser and letter than it found us.
To Pittsburg especially, it has proved
kinder than it promised to be when it came
in, surrounded by threats of strikes and the
overhanging specter of tariff reduction. If
j) the New Year surpasses its promises as its
predecessor did, it will be a brighten in
our business annals.
The salient points in our local develop
ment, both as they have been realized in the
past year and as they are hoped for in the
new one, are strikingly illustrated in the
cartoon which, appears on the first page of
The Dispatch. The magnificent achieve
ments of labor, supplied with material by
capital, appear not only in the bright
pictures of coming things, but in those
which have been relegated to desuetude in
the last twelve months. The artist has
represented 1888 as largely destructive in
its results. It is true that it has in its
records a bursted cast-steel gun, the old
horse cars set down among the relics of a
past age, saloon back doors and pool rooms
closed, an old city government cast off and
a Democratic administration cut short.
But we must credit 1883 with works of con
struction also. It gives us a splendid Court
House, a new city charter, the first cable
line in Pittsburg, and a Ecpublican na
tional victory.
These, however, on Edward Everett Hale's
principle of "looking forward and not back,
may reasonably be cast in the shade by the
details of the bright picture which, as typi
fied by the artist, hangs over Pittsburg as
the good things anticipated for our city in
1889. The new year is expected to give us
in complete form cable or electric transit to
all parts of the city, a splendid exposition
building, Allegheny's library building from
Mr. Carnegie's generosity and although
this is asking unprecedented progress from
the year and the Government archi
tects the new postoffice building ready for
us. If 1889 'supplements these achieve-
merits with the general growth and pros
perity that were characteristic of 1888, it
will fulfil its bright promises and realize
the wish which is appropriate to the season.
In the hope that the blessings of material
and moral growth may be enjoyed by Pitts
burg as a whole, and by all its readers in
dividually The Dispatch hopes that
both the community and the individuals,
collectively and separately, may enjoy a
Happy New Year.
ORPHAN LABOE.
The disclosures made from Findlay of the
chipping of boys from Eastern orphan
asylnms to be employed in the glass facto
ries reveals a new phase of child labor that
evokes a rather indiscriminate condemna
tion, but which, however, requires investi
gation and regulation. That juvenile labor
is required about glass factories is well
known, and that orphan boys should have
a chance to earn their living, is not per se
an abuse. But the orphans should be guar
anteed education, care and security against
overwork; while juvenile labor should not
be permitted except these requirements are
satisfied. The circumstances of this case
give us little reason to expect that they are
provided in the case of the orphan boys
shipped by round lots to Findlay, and the
State should take it upon itself to see that the
business is either stopped or strictly regu
lated. The glass factory is a hard enough
school for boys who have homes and par
ents of their own; and charitable institu
tions should direct their efforts rather to
finding homes for their charges than to
pushing them unprotected into factory life.
WILDCAT BANKING.
The failure of several private banking
louses in Nebraska recently, calls renewed
attention to the weakness and vices of wild
cat banking. The insolvency among this
class of bankers is not due to any lack of
profitable business. On the other hand, the
1 class of money-lending which private banks
' can practice in Nebraska, and from na
tional banks are excluded, yields higher
rates of interest than any other department
.. - of the banking business. It is notorious
, that the great burden of the Nebraska
farmer is the high rate which he must pay
ji! . on mortgage loans. Eight to ten per cent
ra'are ordinary rates; but by the time that the
banker has collected his commissions and
charged his fees for examination of titles, the
farmer who borrows money frequently has
to pay 12 to 15 per cent. '
It is natural to suppose that such profits
would result in wealth and solvency among
the bankers who get the high rates; and it
does so in many cases. But, on the other
hand, the temptations to embark in the
business with little capital, or to expand
credits beyond-the limits of safe abanking,are
eo many and so entirely unrestrained by
Slate regulation that wildcat banks have
become numerous, and are now showing the
inevitable percentage of mortality. Such
failures show the value of a strictly regu-
' -Jatedsystemlikethat which has stood the test
bt twenty-nve years unaer tne national
DDansung law.
9
GIELS WHO CATCH BTTBGLABS.
Some time ago the efficiency of a Swedish
rirl in 2Jew York who caught a burglar in?
Tjlier room and held him captive till the po-
jce arrived, attracted public attention.
ler feat was rivaled the other day by a
voung woman oi cnicago, wnose name
jf Emilia Kunert, indicates German
lor Scandinavian origin, ana woo on
I discovering a burglar emerging from the
'house where she was employed as a dsmes-
rtic. gave chase and ran him down into the
'custody of an officer. These two cases seem
i ' . . , - - . . r -', , ., - - ,!-.-... ..- , i i "flffsHlsr
to leave the honors decidedly on the side of
the immigrant domestic.
Society is in need of mora such girls.
"Whether they come from Germany or Sweden
by steerage passage or even with their fares
paid by prearrangement, the presence of do
mestics who can catch thieves, and turn
them over to custody, will fill a long-felt
want. Possibly the burglarious industry
may file objections to this class of immi
grants; but the owners of houses will rally
to their support. Their value is not necessa
rily confined to their own services. They
"can not only catch thieves themselves, but
the doctrine of heredity allows us to hope
that when they marry they may rear sons
who in the next generation may become po
licemen who will catch thieves if they are
not demoralized by political pulls in the
meantime. The foreign domestic of thief
taking proclivities will become immensely
popular, and her achievements may yet go
to the height of proving that the best thing
this country can do is to fill up its police
systems with recruits of her courage and
fidelity.
A TEDIOUS BIT OP IJTIGATIOH.
It is difficult to see how Judge Siowe
could have done otherwise than dismiss the
application of Mr. Hartupee for a re-opening
of the award against him in the arbitra
tion of.his difficulty with the city about thej
water works' engines contract. The ground
cited that ex-City Attorney Bigelow had
declared to various persons that he per
suaded Mr. Lowry, the Arbitrator, to change
his decision from one in favor of Hartupee
to one adverse, seems in itself tolerably
light "Unless there was something behind
it in the way of fraud or an improper sort
of persuasion, the thought would occur that
it was part of Mr. Bigelow's duty as at
torney for the city to get a verdict for his
client. But as Mr. Bigelow himself took
the stand and denied having cot Mr. Xowry
to change the award, the judgment of the
Court, that such evidence would not war
rant a re-opening of the case, was inevitable.
It is now fifteen years since the engines
were ordered, and during that period the
contract has been a constant source of bitter
controversy and litigation. No citizen will
desire that injustice should be done the con
tractor; but few will wish that, unless for
very clear cause shown, the case so tediously
examined in the courts should be started
afresh.
ITIDICATIKG BIG BUSINESS.
The index of business afforded by the
Clearing House exchanges makes a most
gratifying exhibit for the year just closed.
The total for 1887 was, we believe, the
largest in the history of the Clearing House
up to that time, being 5511,010,701. But
the transactions which produce the checks
passing through the Clearing House gained
even on that total by 14 per cent, reaching
the aggregate of $581,580,614. This indi
cates a steady expansion in the volume of
trade that speaks volumes for the growth
and energy of our city's commerce. It is
also noticeable that the speculative ele
ment which swells the volume of exchanges
in other cities was smaller in this year's
total than for several years past No city
xan show an aggregate which more nearly
represents actual ana legitimate transac
tions than the total of Pittsburg's Clearing
House exchanges.
THE CONSERVATIVE POLICY.
The report of the member of the miners'
union who was sent to Texas to investigate
the miners' strike and to report whether it
is permissible for miners from this section
to accept work there, will give a shock to
the generally-received opinion that labor
organizations always support the cause of
strikers irrespective of the justice or wroDg
of the strike. Mr. Benny went to Texas to
investigate whether the strike, on account
of which Pennsylvania miners were warned
to keep away, was justifiable or not. Find
ing that it was not, and that it involves
only a small number of miners, while the
development of mines offers employment to
a large number of new miners, he recom
mends that union miners in this vicinity
wishing work accept it in the Texas mines.
Such a course will be based on reliable
information and sound policy. Union men
need no urging to support strikers who are
resisting injustice. Indeed the outside
notion has a foundation tothisextentthatthe
union spirit predisposes workingmen to sus
pect that there is wrong on the part of the
employers wherever there is a strike. In
vestigation having shown the contrary in
this case, the miners take the very wise
conrse of refusing to be bound by a need
less and ill-lounded strike. That is un
doubtedly the right policy. It is hard
enough to support the necessary conflicts
without accepting the burden of the un
necessary and foolish sort.
DOESN'T HEED A DICTIONARY.
The gifts which have been showered upon
General Harrison since his election have
not been notable in the main for usefulness.
There is nothing particularly1 useful in a
jack rabbit, for instance, even to a man who
passionately admires that limber animal.
But at first sight the two latest presents to
reach the President-elect are at least useful.
They are sumptuously bound copies of
Worcester's and "Webster's Unabridged
Dictionaries. The fact that General Harri
son has at last received a present which is
not a positive nuisance is important enough
in itself, but the significance of the gift
transcends the mere matter of its utility.
The motives of the publishers who sent the
dictionaries were probably compound half
patriotism and half a keen appreciation of
the benefits of advertising. But underlying,
as it were, these motives, there would seem
to exist a new comprehension of Presidental
duties. The publishers would seem to
imply that a President of the United States
cannot get along without the largest dic
tionary published. And this implication
doubtless has its origin in the part that the
dictionary and the encyclopedia have
played in Mr. Cleveland's administration.
Presidental messages during the last four
years have abounded in long and unusual
words which had plainly been extracted for
the occasion from an unabridged dictionary.
"We trust, however, if the publishers hope
to eee their dictionaries dominate the liter
ature of General Harrison when he becomes
President, that they will be disappointed.
Ten-barrelled words and cunningly con
trived combinations of them are not wanted
in the epistles of aPresident to the American
people. "Wisdom is most sure of reaching
its proper destination in small verbal pack
ages. On the whole we think the publishers
would have done better to have given their
precious volumes to President Cleveland.
His dictionary must be nearly worn out.
The Hartupee tlaim, crushed 'to earth
once more in the county courts, will rise
again by an appeal to the Supreme Court.
The ante-inauguration labors 0 the President-elect
may be conceded to be severe and
onerous; bnt .there does not seem to be much
doubt as to the fact that Mr! Bussill Harri
son is having a good time.- On going to
New York he is made the recipient ofjtll
the attentions from the hospitable or the
politic, has been dined by he whole list of
aspirants from Charles Emory Smith up to
Morton, Childs and Wanamaker, and has
the entree behind the scenes at the bur
lesque opera. There seems to ,be no doubt
that Mr. Harrison, junior will enjoy the
next four years very much, if the fatal dis
position of President's sons to put both feet
in it, does not necessitate his retirement to
private life.
Mayor Gleasok, of Long Island City,
who has again been exhibiting his ability to
tear up railroads that illegally encroach on
public property, would not be a good Mayor
to run for President, from the corporation
standpoint. But the people might find
some attractions in that sort of a candidate.
Bra compositor's error, overlooked in
proof-reading, the phrase "A New Holy
Family," which was written as a heading
to the excellent sermon -by Bev. George
Hodges, of Calvary Episcopal Church, in
yesterday's DisrATCH, appeared in print
as a ''A New Holy Trinity." Of course the
context at once showed the error. Bev. Mr.
Hodges, we can well understand, must have
felt all the resources of his charity drawn
upon by such a blunder; but there is also
the comforting reflection on the other hand,
that The Dispatch compositors have been
the means of sending, without serious error,
many other of his admirable sermons to
hundreds of thousands of readers who de
light in and profit by them weekly.
These may be something in the idea that
Boulanger's " divorce suit is intended to
carry out the parallel between Napoleon
and himself. Bonaparte and Boulanger
are alike in commencing with a "B," and
if the latter hero divorces his wife, there will
be another point of resemblance.
The preliminary announcements of Mrs.
Potter's appearance as Cleopatra indicate
that the poetic and tragic capabilities of M.
"Worth's version of the play are very strik
ing. It will be the greatest exhibition of
dramatic millinery ever made. There is
reason to question its entire accuracy as ap
plied to the character of Cleopatra; but
"Worth's version of Shakespeare will probably-prove
a great success in this age of the
dressmaker's drama.
The panel of jurors which contains the
names of some of the men who are under in
dictment and to be tried by the juries of
which they are presumably members, is the
last idiosyncrasy of our, jury system which
calls attention to the necessity of reform.
It iinteresiing and encouraging to find
in the New York papers articles headed "A
Great Negro." This looks like a recogni
tion of progress on the part of the African
race, that should be pleasant to both white
and black. "When it is further discovered
that the great negro consists of a prize
fighter of African descent it will be further
apparent that the achievements of this col
ored citizen just hits the New York idea of
greatness.'
It is very convenient to put the responsi
bility for the new House rule to prevent
filibustering on "suspension days," on the
back of the Oklahoma bill; but is it quite
certain that the Pacific Railroad bills have
nothing to do with it?
Mb. James Russell Lowell an
nounces that he has nothing to say about
politics, which causes a Western cotem
porary to renew the accusation that he is a
mugwump. Mr. Lowell has not denied his
mugwumpery that we have heard of; bnt it
is no more than discreet to note that a very
large number of politicians have nothing to
say just at present, whom the wildest
scandals never accused of independence.
The" rise in gas shares may perhaps be
due to the growing conviction that there is
more gas in the vicinity of Pittsburg than it
was the fashion to think, a few months ago.
That, at least, is the sanguine and hopeful
.theory to take of it.
The drop in the price of high wines
has taken place as announced and the
Whisky Trust is throwing away its money
in the endeavor to freeze out the independ
ent concerns. After the'squeeze is over, the
trust organs will adopt the usual policy of
holding up the low prices as an example of
the ruinous effect of competition.
Tiie indication that. the Legislature is
going to follow in the steps of its predeces
sors, is very strong when arrangements are
reported for a recess before the body has
convened.
The preliminary injunction is taking a
hand in the making of gas rates at New
Castle also. Would it not have been just
as well in the long run for the corporations
to haTve permitted competition to fix the
rates rather than to let that question resolve
itself into a football between the courts and
the corporations?
PEES0NAL PACTS AND FANCIES.
Me. Beiqht believes in phrenology.
The "Bantam of Berlin" forbids his serv
ants to wear mustaches.
Ex-Senator Rollins, of New Hampshire,
is steadily regaining health.
Mr. Gladstone says he can quote from
memory any page of Homer of which the first
line is given to him.
Mr. Alvan Clark has gone to Denver to
arrange for the construction of a telescope
with a 20-inch lens for the college there.
Kabaoeokgvttch, Pretender to the Ser
vian throne, has come into a fortune. Bnt he
would doubtless exchange his bank notes for a
crown piece.
Rider Haggard is very much annoyed at
the attacks of critics on his recent works. But
he has had his revenge. The critics had to
read his book.
The most prominent brigand in China, Ho
Ta Lao-hu, has been captured and killed. He
was a giant, being 7 feet 2 inches in heightand
broad in proportion. He had been concerned
in a great many robberies and a large number
of murders. LI Hung! Chang, Viceroy of
China, made up his mind that the burly ruffian
mnst bo checked in his career. Ho Ta Lao-hu
made a bold fight against the troops sent to
arrest him, but was fatally wounded during the
skirmish.
AN interesting account is given of the last,
hours of Prjevalsky, the Russian explorer and
"annexation intriguer," by his comrade, Mr.
Bobarowsky. Knowing that death was Inevit
able, ho made some final arrangements, and
asked whether he would live till the riorning.
Being reassured by the doctor on this head, he
remarked: "Then the rest to-morrow; we will
send telegrams. One request only, do not for
get that I desire strenuously to be buried on
the banks of Issik Koul, In the full costume of
the expedition. Let them photograph me for
my family, with the Lancaster gun, which I
leave to Bobarowsky." Prjevalsky then told
the doctor not to hide from him the approach
of death, which he feared not at all, having
often enough been face to face with death be
fore. "He scolded us," says Bobarowsky,
"and calfed us women-folk, when he saw us
with tears in onr eyes." Next day he was delir
ious. He became stronger, and had brief
lucid intervals. Suddenly he sprang out of
bed and stood upright, supported by those'pres
ent After remaining thns for a few moments,
he said: "Now I am going to lie down." He
was helped back to bed, sighed deeply several
times and died.
THE TOPICAL TALKER. HUGH ADO ABOUT NOTHING. ' AT THE THEATERS. GHOST TOUED THE BELLS. CURIOUS C0U1V-, jSk
It la Really a Shame to Tell All These
Secret About Lovely Woman.
Two servants of Irish birth lived with a
family in the suburbs of Pittsburg for nearly a
dozen years, and the other day one of them
died. Naturally the other was in great grief;
she is a big-hearted woman and a good deal of
a character.
"In all the years." she said to a friend who
was condoling with her.'Tve lived In the house
with Maggie I've never heard her say a single
word behind my back, never a word tu
And she hadn't the least idea of committing
a "bull" when she said it either.
V
Mb. Eve Have you packed that trunk yetT
Mrs. Eve Yes, dear everything's in it but
the Bible.
Mr. Eve The BibleT What do you meanT
Mrs. Eve I wonldn't like to lose a trunk
without a Bible in it I can always identify It
by the Bible, you know.
'.
What won't girls try in the attempt to
achieve beautyT
A young women of Pittsburg who has enough
good looks, if she only knew it, to make her
way in the world, has been trying all sorts of
queer and quack receipts for beauty. In par
ticular she has set her heart and her mind and
her hands upon making her flesh soft and vel
vety, a quality which can be no more acquired
by nostrums than by Act of Congress. But
with perseverance worthy of a better cause,
this damsel has been toiling off and on to
give her chocks and neck and hands the
velvety softness of the peach.
Generally, I have been able to detect the
course of some ridiculous treatment by the
greater or less resemblance her skin bore to
that of the leopard, who, sensible beast that he
is, rejoices in his spots. The last experiment, I
only know by hearsay, has frightened Made
moiselle so badly that I guess sho'll hereafter
leave her complexion and her epidermis alone.
In the strictest confidence I may tell you that
the last experiment was a beautifully simple
thing. Before retiring for the night Made
moiselle applied, to her face, neck and
hands poultices of bread and milk. She
slept, all night through how she did
it I don't know with these sloppy embrace
ments upon her. In the morning she aroso and
ran to the glass the first thing to see the won
ders worked by the poultices. There-wero
wonders, indeedl But not what she expected.
Her skin had shriveled up; it looked liko a
piece of corrugated canvas, or zinc roofing
painted white. In fact she reminded herself of
"She" after the final passage through tho
fountain of fire.
But, unlike "She," she recovered her pristine
looks. And Bhe has foresworn poultices for
ever. Beware thou also in time!
V
"Come to your wedding, my dear boy T" said
the undertaker to a young man in the shadow
of matrimon j; "you bet I will. And, say, when
you die I'll give you the finest funeral you ever
sawl"
V
lira Pittsburg barber's, or I should sayton
sorial parlors, the other day a fair friend of
mine settled herself calmly down to have her
bang trimmed. There is nothing they say
that is the only possible authorities, the ladies
say nothing so intensely gratifying as to
have an unruly, tangled up, ill-tempered,
uneven bang reuueed to orderly comeliness by
the scissors of an artistic barber. In the
ecstacy of passing through this operation my
fair friend happened to look from her com
partment or screened stateroom, in which each
customer is secluded at this particular shop
I mean parlor into the mirror in front of her.
She was astonished at what she saw.
The glass showed in a stateroom, at the other
end of the parlor, a woman who was also In the
hands of a barber, but she seemed to be endur
ing the most excruciating pain. Her features
were twisted as if by acute physical torture.
It was really impossible to look at unmoved.
I i "What, in the name of goodnesst" said my
fair friend to the tonsorial professor, who was
respectfully clipping the left flank of her volu
minous bang, "what, in the name of gracious,
is that woman doing!"
"Oh, that's a lady who comes here ev'ry four
or five weeks, ma'am," the professor answered
in a whisper, "to have de white hairs pulled
outen her head. It's pow'ful hard on her but,
bress you, she have come for years now."
"Don't the white hairs grow In again!"
"Ob course dey do, ma'am and more fre
quenter as dey are pulled ut!"
A TILLAGE FOE THE INDIGENT.
A Southern Town Where Accomodation!
Cost Nothing: nt All.
CHABLESTOif, December 31. Over 60 indi
gent elderly persons were housed to-night in
the Euston Home village, in the suburbs of the
city. William Euston, a wealthy furniture
dealer, who died nearly half a century ago, left
all his property to the city for the purpose of
establishing a home modeled after that in
Canterbury, England, bis birthplace. Nothing
was done about it until the administration of
Mayor Courtenay, about nine years ago, when
steps were taken to execute the trust Ar
rangements were made with the surviving heirs
of the testator, and about 200.000 was placed
at the disposal of the trustees, the village was
begun and 20 substantial cottages were built
Most of them are now occupied.
The village will consist of 40 cottages. The
cottages are of brick and granite, and are pro
vided with all the latest impiovements in the
way of heating, lighting and sanitary arrange
ments. The inmates are supplied with fuel,
light, water and other conveniences, have a
pension and a plot of ground for cultivation.
"When the applicants received their appoint
ment1!, the truckmen got up a corner, charging
2 a load for moving the furniture. J. M. Con
nelly, a prominent undertaker, at once offered
the use of bis vehicles free of charge and broke
up the trust He moved upward of 20 of the
inmates withont charge. The Euston Home is
one of the largest charitable institutions in-the
South. It will, when completed, afford com
fortable homes to upward of 200 indigent per
sons. P0ETY TEAES ON THE STAGE.
A Yankee Who Has Driven a Little Bed
Conch Sinco 1S4S.
BANGOR, Me., December 3L Harvey Ward,
who drives the stage between East Eddington
and Bangor, is the oldest stage driver in the
whole Eastern country. His route Is only a
dozen miles long, but It takes him into a
country where the railroad and telegraph are
not yet known,and where the graceful deer and
lumbering bear cross tho road eveiy day
where, in fact a person might easily imagine
himself a thousand miles from any city. Harvey
always eats bis Thanksgiving dinner in Bangor,
and at the same hotel, and on last Thanksgiv
ing Day he drove up to the Windsor for his
fortieth consecutive annual feast in the identi
cal red coach which he drew dp at the same
door on Thanksgiving Day, 184S.
Trouble for New York Judges.
Trom toe New York World. J
Exactly how to sentence a criminal to death
under the new law is at present puzzling the
Criminal Court Judges. The following form
possesses the practical value of being terse,
scientific and to the point: "I therefore sentence
you to be taken to Sing Sing prison, there to re
main confined until the day of , 183,
between the hours of and A. jr., when you
will be taken to a cell specially designed for
that purpose, be forcibly seated in a properly
insulated chair, with one eheophore placed upon
the junction of your frontal and , parietal
sutures and the other just over your medulla
oblongata, and then and there made conductor
for an alternating current of LSOO volts in
tensity from a dynamo constructed for that
specific purpose, said current to pass through
the ganglia and vasomotor centers of your
cerebral tissue until you are dead, dead, dead,
and may the Lord have mercy on what is left
of you."
No(Well Named.
From the Chlcaeo Times.:
"Canada" Is said to be a Portuguese word
signifying "there is nothing here." Then they
had better call it something else. The United
States has several citizens over there who
went away in a hurry. We know there is some
thing there.
DEATHS OP A DAY.
Charles Maxwell Allen.
Bzrmcda, December 31. Charles Maxwell Al
len, the United States Consul for Bermuda, died at
his residence, "Wlstowe" Flatts, Monday, De
cember 24.
Judge C. B. Sleeper.
BaAiXZBD, MrKir., December 31, Judge C'B.
Sleeper, or the fifteenth Judicial-district died
this morning. He has been prominent in illnne-
ota politics for many years.
Washington Pastors Don'? Consider tho In
auguration Ball Much of a Dance.
Special Telegram to the Dispatch.
Washington, December 3L A vast deal of
amusement has been createdhere by the sudden
awakening of the out-of-town clergy to the sin
fulness of tbe inauguration balL Presidents
Garfield and Hayes were both good Christians,
but not even the clergy or the members of their
church thought of criticising the ball or find
ing fault with their attendance upon it Tbe
truth is the so-called ball cannot properly be
called a ball. Very few of the great throng
which invariably attends this President's first
night care to dance or find opportunity to
dance. It is really the President's first public
reception. Presidents who have been ac
customed to dance have sometimes led the
dance, but this has happened rarely.
Of the society crushes that occur during tbe
season in Washington the inauguration ball is
by all edds the most harmless. This is so well
known to tbe people at Washington that the
local clergy have never thought of preaching
against the practice, and because of their
neglect they have been condemned by their
outside brethren for their supposed encourage
ment of Immorality. Rev. Dr. Bartlett now of
tbis city, who has twice had charge of churches
which were attended by President Harrison,
declares that he does not find anything sinful
in the inauguration ball, and is of the opinion
that Mr. Harrison will not choose this occasion
to administer a rebuke to persons who differ
with himself in regard to dancing.
Tbe custom of the ball originated far back
in the early days of the Republic, and is looked
upon rather as an occasion associated with that
'memorable day than as an opportunity for
giddy people to gratify their love of dancing.
B0LITAE CAN'T BLEEP.
Jealousy and Railroad Trains Make an
Elephant's Life miserable.
Philadelphia, December 31. Bolivar, the
mammoth elephant cannot sleep. He is
troubled with the worst form of insomnia, and
the authorities at the Zoological Garden and
his keeper have made a critical investigation,
and have arrived at the conclusion that it is
due to the continual rattle and noise of the
trains of the Pennsylvania Railroad, which roll
within 50 yards of Bolivar's domicile. The old
fellow has grown quite crusty from loss of
sleep, in spite of tbe fact that ho has been on
tbe road with circus companies for the past 18
years. "Bolivar has not slept a wink since he
has been here," said Head Keeper Byrne yes
tcrday. "He has not laid down once since bis
arrival. Elephants generally lie down and
take a nap of three hours duration every night,
hat poor Bolivar has refused thus far to rest
his weary limbs while tbe noise keeps up.
Once in a long while he closes his eyes for a
few minutes, and then with a great dignity
opens them."
Bolivar's keepers also affirm that there is an
other reason for his insomnia. He has two
room-mates Empress and Jennie. The latter
has been very jealous ot Bolivar since his
arrival because he seems to show a greater
amount of affection for the Empress. Every
chance Jennie gets she buts against good-
natured Bolivar, and acts in a very rude way
toward him. This family trouble has annoyed,
the newcomer considerably, and he seems to
fear lest if in an unguarded moment he allows
himself to be wafted into tbe balmy arms of
gomnus Jennie might be influenced by the
green snake of jealousy to play sad havoc on
his carcass.
GE0WTH OP THE NEW SOUTH.
A Review of the Phenomenal Progress of
the Past Year.
Baltimore, December 3k The Mamifao
turert' Record, in its annual review of the
South's industrial progress, shows that the
capital represented by new mining and manu
facturing enterprises organized in 1S83 was
5103,800,000.
During 1SS8 there were organized in the
South 3,618 new enterprises, against 3,430 In
1SS7, and 1,575 in 1886, a total for three years of
8,623, In addition to which there were hundreds
of small enterprises, such as grist mills, gins,
etc., not counted in this enumeration.
In the South, since 1880, 20,000 miles of new
railroad have been built and over STOO.OOO.OOO
have been spent in building new roads and im
proving old ones. Cotton mills have increased
from 180, with 16,222 looms and 713,989 spindles
in 1880. to over 300 mills with about 38,000 looms
and 1,800,000 spindles, while many mills'are uu
der construction, and many old ones being
enlarged. The value of cotton goods made in
the Month was $21,000,000 in 1880, and nearly
$50,000,000 for 1888. In 18E0 there were 40 cotton
seed oil mills in the 8outh. now there are about
160, with about !12,O0O,O0O Invested.
The value of the South's agricultural pro
ducts for 1883 were about SSO0,00O,O0O, against
$571,000,000 in 1879. The value of the live stock
is now $575,000,000, while in 1879 it was $391,
400,000. Tne production of grain rose from 431,
074.630 bushels lnn?80 to 626,305,000 bushels in
1SS7, an increase ot nearly 200,000,000 bushels.
CLOSING UP THE IEAE.
Lively Scenes on the Floor of the Chicago
Board of Trade.
Chicago, December 31. The boys on the
Board of Trade celebrated the close of busi
ness for the year in a way that would have
made a band ef Apache Indians wild with
envy, and sent cold chills down the backs of
the howling terrors of the New York Stock
Exchange. Plug hats were knocked off and
kicked to pieces. Neatly dressed traders were
pelted with flour and rushed and tumbled
about until their clothes were literally torn off
them. Toy cannons! were fired, and many a
nervous man thought the Anarchists were try
ing to blow upthe building.
At length President Hutchinson read the
rioters a lesson. He said that their actions
would disgrace even a crowd of toughs, and
were decidedly out of place in a representa
tive body of business men. Not only that, but
it was an injustice to men who were trying to
do bnsincss and close up their trades for the
year. He wanted the nonsense stooped at
once, and said he would suspend for" a week
any member guilty of disobedience.
COOLED HIS AEDOE.
A Lover Backs Oat Because His Affianced
Kissed Other Men.
Special Telegram to the Dispatch.
New Yoke, December 3k Patrick Murri
gan loved Mary Fitzimmons six months ago,
and he promised to marry her. He bought her
a sealskin sacque, a pair of silk stockings and
some jewelry. They intended to be married
yesterday. Mrs. Fitzimmons hired a hall, a
priest and bought a fruit cake.
All these details were related to-day in a com
plaint against Murrigan for breach of promise,
for be did not come to the wedding. He said
he found out at the last minute that Mary let
other men kiss her while she was engaged to
him. Ho is in jail
. ALDEEMANIC TACTICS.
Opponenti of a Scheme Pat Up a Job on
Its Friends.
Special Telegram to the Dispatch.
N rw Yoee, December 31 The old year went
out with a big hullabaloo in the City Council
to-day. Tbe Aldermen who do not wish an
electric motor in Fourth avenue put up a job
on tbe Aldermen who do. They declared tbe
meeting illegal, because to-morrow is the regu
lar day for holding it They then scurried out
of the room, without giving tbe friends of
tbe electric motor time to argue with them.
The Council was left with no quorum. The
Bergeant-at-Arms tried to bring back the bolt
ers, but they frightened him off with bad .lan
guage. Then every one adjourned to the cor
ridors to call some other Aldermen hard names.
CARYEE'S GREAT EECOED.
With 60,670 Cartridges He Makes a Score
, of 60,000 Hits.
Minneapolis, December 31. The greatest
feat of marksmanship on record was com
pleted at 2:30 o'clock this morning when Dr.
Carver was gladdened by tbe score of 60.000
hits out of 60,670 shots. There were but few
spectators present when the doctor finished
the hardest tasK ne ever lacmea. ae loosed
pretty well worn when the last gun was n
loaded. His eyes were red, ana be h"
looked like the man who opened Are at w
balls at 10 o'clock last Monday moral'
60,670 cartridges which he shot we' .
pounds.
Sending Rocks to Oregon.
from tbe Portland Oregonlan.
The S. G. Reed brought down a singuu.
of cargo Monday morning in the shape of son.,
stone sinkers for buoys, welgbing 6,500 pounds
apiece. They came all the way from Pittsburg
rather a long way to haul rock to Astoria and
pay $50 a ton freight on It when rock just as
good could be had close by. The mistake was
probably that while iron sinkers were ordered
by the officers here, the stone article was sent
Slick Them Down With Resolution.
From the New York World. 1
Jn thinking over tbe sort and the number of
"new leaves" to "b,e turned over at the begin
ning of the new year it is wise to lay In a sup
ply of tbe glue1 ofanrmresoiutiontoatickthem
down with.
Mania Mitchell Captures PIttsbnrs; Nat-,
oral Gas and Opera.
It is becoming a stale statement to" say that
the Bijon theater is crowded. Last night there
were camp chairs in every corner of thetbeater
into which they could be squeezed, and in a
few places where they ought really not to be.
The crowds just puzzled the management to
provide for them. And it was this overflowing
audience that Maggie Mitchell mastered in hec
old style; tickled them into shouts of laughter;
sweeping them suddenly into tears before
they knew, it It is wonderful to see
Miss Mitchell run the gamut of tbe emotions
and insist on her audience accompanying her.
She was in splendid spirits last night, and in
the crirlish character of Rail in her new nlav
'of that name, she was even more buoyant more
iuii oi kicks ana waggery man usual, ino
character of Ray is not a novelty. It is a
variety of the Jl'lUs model, but prettily fitted
for Maggie Mitchell. She dominates and in-spires-the
play, and lends its crnde and impossi
ble story an air of truth. In every thing Miss
Mitchell is not commendable. Her exaggerated
and offensivo vulgarity in eating the lunch
with her lover is a blunder which she ought
not to be guilty of. Because it is true to
nature, a very low and repulsive part of
nature, it doesn't follow that Miss Mitchell is
justified in resorting to it
Tbe play is really better than thrfl common
run of dramas written about and around astar.
Its plot includes the impossible, but it well
brought to a finish, and the Incidents of the
riot and other climaxes are picturesque and
bold. Mr. Charles Abbott and the company as
a whole give Miss Mitchell a very adequate and
praiseworthy support
The Grand Opera Home.
"Natural gas," with Donnelly and Girard in
tbe leading roles, was presented at the Grand
Opera House last evening. These clever com
edians, with the aid of a fair company, suc
ceeded in gaining the object for which this
musical farce comedy was constructed, that is,
they make laughter run all tbe evening.
Mr. Donnelly, as Christopher Bluff, and Mr.
Girard, as Whirlem 0'Rov.rke, the model
olice officer, have both improved since their
ast appearance in this city, altbongh some of
their jokes are showing signs of old age. Their
songs and imitations are still wonderfully good,
ana were, as usual, liberally applauded. Mr.
Mark Sullivan, as Nols E. Howell, is a clever
mimic, but he is not much more.
Ben Collins gave us a reminder of the old ways
of minstrelsy, with a good deal of success.
Sheer nonsense can be made very laughable by
such a man as Mr. Collins, bnt it is quite pos
sible to give an audience too much of non
sense. The Kitty Alalone and Jimpty are not
so good this year as they were last but tbe lat
ter is still very brigbt and pleasant in tbe per
son of Miss Lena Merville. The musical side of
"Natural Gas" fell a victim to the orchestra
last night What was the matter is bard to
say exactly, bnt probably if the musicians had
a casual acquaintance with tbe music they are
required to play the results would be more har-
monlous,
., ix less uizarre.
Harris' Theater.
"Prince Methusalem" was the opera selected
by the' Kimball Opera Company to open its
week's engagement at Harris' Theater. An ex
cellent impression was made by tho company,
the chorus work of which is by far the most en
joyable part of tbe performance. The drilling
of the soldiery shows that careful attention to
details for which Mrs. Jennie Kimball Is so well
known. There are a number of fresh young
voices in the chorus, and there is quito an op-
Sortunity for several in the solo parts. Miss
lancbe Chapman, as J'rince Methusalem, was
sprightly and a pretty prince, and Miss Annie
Lnkie, as J'ulcinello, a very sweet bride. Ed
Chapman's Siegcsmond and Arthur Bell's Cy
prian were quite clever. The same opera will
be given this afternoon. To-morrow "The Mas
cot," Thursday, "Queen's Lace Handkerchief."
The souvenir matinees are continued this
week.
Academy of Slastc.
If you have a desire to begin the new year
laughing, you cannot do better than trot
straightway to Manager Williams' mirth pre
serves on Liberty street The Kemell Com
pany there this week Is not so remarkable for
eccentric features as for all-around power in
tbe fun-making line. Beginning with Harry
Kernell himself, there are a round dozen men
and women in the company who can make
laughter as easy as winking. The other spe
cialists are very good.
Notes of tho Stnse.
The two weeks following Miss Mitchell's en
gagement at the Bijou will be devoted to Mr.
William Gillette's celebrated plavs, "Held by
tbe Enemy," on January 7, and "She" on Jan
uary 14.
Mbs. Pat O'Brien extends a lofty and
broad invitation to New Year's callers this day
at the Casino Museum. She will be assisted by
two Albinos, Turtle Boy George and a host of
other freaks equally astonishing. The theator
ium contains many bright features.
FITE HAD GOLDEN WEDDINGS.'
A Family In Which LonK Married Life Has
Been tbe Rale.
from the Philadelphia Press.
Were the query of Mona Caird as to whether
marriage Is a failure propounded to Mr. and
Mrs. A. L. Felten, who on Thursday night cele
brated their golden wedding at their home,
1723Gratz street It would receive a most pro
nounced negative. Mrs. Felten is the last of
five granddaughters ot George Esher, who was
a drummer boy In the Continental army at the
battle of Germantown, to celebrate her golden
wedding.
Mr. Felten is 75 years old, "and his wife, hale
and hearty, has reached the jage of 73 years.
Mr. Felten comes of a loDjr-Iived and prolific
family. His father and motierwere the parents
of 16 sons and 5 daughters, 11 of whom are still
living, the oldest of whom has reached the ad
vanced age of 82 years. Mrs. Felton is the last
surviving danghterof a familyof 11 daughters,
five of whom had the unusual experience of
celebrating their golden wedding. Mr. and
Mrs. Felten are the parents of five children,
and four grandchildren will carry down the
name to posterity.
ONLY A DAI 0E SO NEEDED.
General Harrison Thinks Short Work Can
be Made of One Case.
Special Telegram to the Dispatch.
Washington, December 31. If a little
story told by a gentleman who has just re
turned from Indianapolis be true, it is evident
that President Harrison has kept himself
pretty well informed in regard to those Demo
cratic officials who have been guilty of most
offensive partisanship from tbe Republican
standpoint The gentleman says that during a
call he and others made upon the President
elect the name of the public printer was men
tioned, and some one suggested that he would
be a good subject for tbe early attention of the
headsman.
Mr. Harrison smiled and, said: "1 expect to
bo pretty busy the day following my inaugura
tion, but on the next day I think I shall have a
little leisure to look after the case of Mr. Bene
dict" '
A HEATI RAILWAY POST.
Complimentary Names to the New Postal
Cars of tbe Chlcngo-Now YorkLlne.
Washington. December 31. The Postmas
ter General has directed that the eight new
postal cars just completed for the New York
and Chicago line be named as follows: "Daniel
Mannin"." "Mr. Justice Field," "Governor
Felch," (ex-Governorof Michigan): "George 8.
Bangs,"(ex-General Superintendent and found
er of the railway mail service): "Governor
Palmer." (of Illinois); "Governor Gray." (of
Indiana): "W. F. Vilas" and "Allen G. Thur
maru" This line, it is said, is the heaviest rail
way post in the world.
IToo Free With Her Kisses. 1
Special Telegram to the Dispatch.
New York, December 3t Harris Adelson
was divorced from bis wife to-day. She made
love to one of his friends two weeks ago. She
called the friend darling and kissed him under
the left ear. The friend went straight to Mr.
vison and told him all about it
THAT'S IN A NAME?
rtiman whose name was Wemyss
- at last, so it semyss,
.se the people would not?
Vt
1 .erstand that they ought
aa not Weemls, but Weems,
To
' ther whose last name was Knollys
fried vainly to vote at tbe pollys;
fiat no ballot he cast
Because till tbe last
The clerk couldn't call Enolllii Nolu.
And then a young butcher named Belvolr
Went and murdered a man with a devoir
Because the man couldn't.
Or possibly wouldn't
Pronounce his nameproperly Beever.
There was an athlete named Strachan
Who had plenty of sinew and brachan.
And he'd knocks man down
; With an indignant frown,
If be failed to pronounce his name Strawn.
-London Xima.
A Specter Climbed Into a. Church Tower and
Rang; the Chiracs.
Prom the Atlanta Journal. 1
Before the earthquake shook it down, tbe old
guard house or police station was just across
the street, In front of the church. Every night
for years an old policeman, who bad grown old
and decrepit in the service of his country and
lastly of his city, kept watch at the door. 4 He
bad seen many strange sights, and he always
said that the strangest he had ever
seen was the dead man ringing the chimes from
the belfry of old StMicbael's. He bad seen the
shrouded figure, time and again, climb up to
the bells, and, not touching the ropes, which
had been pulled so often by living hands, swing
tne heavy iron tongues against tbe siaB of the
bells and clash out a fearful melody -which
thrilled while it horrified the listener.
He would tell you, if yon cared to listen to
his story, how the ghost had been murdered,
for in its normal state it had been'nurdered by
the thrust of an Italian stilletto in Elliot street
Tbe spirit was to "walk the eartb," "revisit
the glimpses of the moon," ring the old
chimes, and do other horrible things, until tbe
murderer was captured.
A ,few minutes before midnight the old
watchman would see this spectral cbimer enter
the church doors, forgetting to open them,
swiftly and in a very ghostly way glide up the
steps of tbe winding stair, pause under the
bells by the rones where Gadsden rings them,
pass swiftly on without touching them, climb
on into the gloomy belfry and stop beneath the
open mouths of tbe bell. They yawned down
upon it, as if striving to swallow up therestless
spirit Suddenly, as if the inspiration had
come, the shrouded band would move silently
and rapidly from iron tongue to iron tongue,
and the wild eldritch music would swell out
upon tbe midnight air.
MANI MILLIONS IX TEDSTS.
Substantial Returns Made 10 the Holders of
Boston's Copper Stocks.
Special Telegram to the Dispatch.
Boston, December 3k Boston's copper
stocks have made substantial returns to their
holders the past year, because of the opera
tions of La Societe Industrelle Commerciale
des Metaux. Boston has received some $2,500,
000 more in dividends from its copper stock in
vestments In 1888 than it did in 1887, by reason'
of the "syndicate" placing the price of the
metal to consumers on a profitable basis for
the mining companies. There is a net increase
in the market value of the eight dividend-paying
copper stocks in 1SS8 of $16,252,500, or more
than 50 per cent. Meanwhile, the aggregate
amount of dividends disbursed by these com
panies has increased 170 per cent The market
value of the non-dividend-paying copper stocks
has increased in equal proportion, some of
them even more, adding the present market
value of the dozen or sa non-dividend-paying
but producing Lake Superior mines and in
cluding the Butte and Boston. Santa Fe, ana
other companies, and it is safe to figure tbe
grand total market value of Boston's copper
companies at $62,000,000.
Comparing this with the market value of
Boston copper properties a year ago, shows
fully $10,000,000 increase by reason of the or
ganization of new companies and the apprecia
tion in value of tbe old and smaller properties
added to tbe $16,262,500 appreciation, shown in
the eight dividend payers, as above tabulated,
gives tbe total increase as considerable over
S5,00O,00O a very substantial addition to Bos
ton's worldly prosperity in a year characterized
by by so much shrinkage in railroad stocks.
AMEEICAN NEWS IN JAPAN.
How the SnekvIUe Incident Was Explained
by the Tycoon's Editors.
Toklo Letter to New York Tribune. J
When the telegraph informed Japan that tbe
American press had demanded that the British
Minister at Washington "be handed his pass
port" for trying to influence the election, and
that President Cleveland had recommended a
change of ministers, there was in a few Japanese
newspaper offices considerable flurry and ex
citement Tbe expression "be bunded his pass
port" was a puzzle. But the dispatch had to
be put into print at once lest some rival paper
get ahead. There was no alternative.no time
to inquire; and, necessity knowing neither law
nor mercy, the perplexed translator had to
take the leap in the dark with a result evident
enough to a bewildered public on the day fol
owlng. One paper said: "On account of his having
taken part in the Presidental election, tbe
American press demands that the British Min
ister at Washington shall hand back his pass
port" Another informed its readers: The
American press demands that the British Min
ister at Washington shall have an itinerary in
order to enable him to employpersuasion on
tbe Presidental election." A third paper gave
ine louowmg ruuuenng: "ine Dritisn- AniDas
sador is going to be utilized. The American
press recommends that his passport shall be
handed to him in order that he may be in a
position to assist at the Presidental election."
What a deluge of subtle Irony these transla
tors have put into their work, all unconsciously
and with malice toward nonel
THEIE HANDS QUITE FULL.
Sponsors of tho Republican Tariff Bill Sit
tins; In Continuous Session.
Washington, December 31. A season of al"
most unexampled activity is upon tbe Republi
can members of Senate Finance sub-Committee
in charge of the substitute for tbe Mills bill.
Messrs. Morrill, Allison. Aldrlch, Sherman and
Hiscock are in almost continuous session in the
effort to make it as near satisfactory to all the
interests involved as may be. This can be done
onlybyamending.it in some particulars, and
the purpose of tbe sub-committee is to decide
what amendments shall be proposed.
It is necessary that the desired amendments
be agreed upon for the entire measure in ad
vance, so that if detailed consideration of tho
sections of the bill prior to tbe date fixed for a
final vote upon its passage, the 21st of January
if possible, tbe committee may have its changes
ready to be proposed in bulk and disposed of in
the same way.
BEEIAH WlLLTfNS' PAPEE.
Ho Will Likely Begin the New Yenr ns a
Washington Editor.
Special Telegram to the Dispatch.
Washington, December 81. The roport la
that the Morning, Post, of this city, will on
Wednesday be transferred by Mr. Stilon
Hutchins to Hon. Beriah Wilkins, of Ohio,
and ex-Postmaster General Hatton. late of tbe
New York Press. It is stated on good au
thority that Mr. Wilkins has made the first
payment and that tho sale is absolute, the sum
paid being $130,000.
It is said that Hatton will have entire charge
of the paper, and that Mr. Wilkins has put in
his money simply as an investment, and be
cause he intends to make Washington his
home in future. Ho already has large vested
interests here, and during the last year has
erected for his own occupancy one of the finest
residences on Massachusetts avenue.
MAIL DELITEET INSUEED.
An Absolute Guarantee of Pnfety in Trans
mission to bo Parcfaascablc.
Special Telegram to the Dispatcn.
New York, December 31. A New York in
surance company commences on January 2 to
Insure money, bonds and securities, as well as
packages of merchandise, sent by registered
mail. The insurance amounts to an absolute
guarantee. The insurance begins simulta
neously with the receipt by the insured of tho
usual certiflcnto of the postmaster, indicating
that the package has been deposited in the
postoffice for registration, and continues until
the postoffice employes at the office of destina
tion have delivered it
The Government assumes no liability for loss
of a registered package.
EMANCIPATION'S BIETHDAT.
Great Preparations for Celebrating
the
Qnnrtcr-Ccntcnnial In Now York.
Special Teletrram to the Dispatch.
New Yobk, December 3L The colored peo
ple here are taking an active interest in the
celebration of the twenty-fifty anniversary of
President Lincoln's publication of the Emanci
pation Proclamation. For somo time various
committees have been making preparations for
the celebration and a big time is assured.
Frederick Douglass, Rev. Dr. Derrick. B. K.
Bruce, and many other prominent colored men
have been invited to speak. Next Wednesday
evening and Cooper Union will probably be
the time and place.
Mrs. Gould Still Paralyzed.
Special Telegram to the Dispatch.
New YORX,December3L. Mrs. Gould passed
a fairly comfortable night Her physician says
to-day that tbe fact that she was removed from
one bed to another yesterday must not be ac
cepted as evidence of any great improvement
in his patient. She is still completely paralyzed
on one side.
Merely a Colncjdence.
From the Philadelphia, Becord.l
There is no sinister suggestion in the fact
that the sun will go into eclipse on the very day
,the State legislatures are to" convene. It will
'"just hapten so" that's all
Texas had 895 indict!
1887 and 1888.
.rinnnff tl,anv..Ant
..ul.,r.N,.,n
been graduated from thUveuw
schools. ,..-;0V
That Rockland Me., schoolma'am. has
paid her election bet by selling peanuts in tha
post-office all day, and mads $37, which was
s wu au si iwviu vuatltji J
A young pastor in Maine distributes
every Sunday to his auditors a printed skele
Wlsl
m
ton of his morning sermon. He wants tb em to '
carry something home with him, he says. It is
hoped that they take hom'e something mora -'
than bones. "
-7-Students before being admitted to the ,
University of Mississippi are required to4k
appear before a board of professors and answer - '
whether they have any firearms about them or
whether some person or persons had any In
keeping for them. If so they must be delivered c&
up before the applicants axa declared full J
students.
At a farmers' meeting in Warren, Pa.,
D. M. Davis gave an account of a sad experi
ment in feeding snlphnr to his hogs two years q
ago, by wbicn he lost S400 worth. He also mads .
a bad break recently Dy giving buckwheat
shorts to these flnnicky animals, and eight pigs
and five shoats died in consequence. Mr.
Davis is now prejudiced against buckwheat ins
any form.
George Lincoln, of Coatesville, Pa., has
just fallen heir to 511,000 hi a curious way. An
elderly German visiting this country some
years ago met Lincoln and took a fancy to him.
The German returned to Europe after a time
and Lincoln bad forgotten all about bim until
he was informed recently that the old man was
dead and bad left him his entire estate. Lin
coln is a journeyman printer and has set type
in every State in the Union.
A tramp passed through Augusta, Me.,
called "English Charley," who quoted scrip
ture as glibly as he gave a history ef the prize
ring, and narrated the story of the Rebellion,
giving all the battles and skirmishes in which
tbe Union army was victorious or defeated as
clearlv as be discused theevents of the present
day. Thirty-three years ago he was asoldier
in the English army, and he vivaciously told
the stcry of the fall ot Sebastapol in 1855, which
he witnessed.
Five tramps who entered the village of
Burlington, Wis., on Christmas Day. begged
money of the citizens and purchased tools
generally used by burglars. Tbe residents be
came suspicious and the village officers and
merchants procured guns and watched at night
for the supposed criminals. Notwithstanding
the precaution taken, the fellows blew open
two safes, securing 300 in notes and $500 in
money. Tbey also entered five residences in
the heart of the village, and, although tha
notes were found in a railroad yard, the thieves
escaped.
Epitaph on a tombstone in the Island of
Jamaica: "Here lieth the body of Lewis Galdy,
Esq., who died the 22d of September. 1739, age
80 years. He was born at Montpelier, in
France, which place he left for his religion and
settled in this island, where, in the great earth
quake in the year 1692, he was swallowed up,
and by the great providence of God, by a
second shock, was thrown out into the sea.
where he continued swimming till he was taken
up by a boat and miraculously preserved. He
afterward lived in great reputation and was
universally lamented."
It is said that the town of Howland,
Me., derived its name from the exclamation
ruide by an adventurous white man. who fell
in love with and stole away from her father's
wigwam, a young and beautiful squaw. He
was pursued down the Piscataquis, where he
took his sweetheart into his canoe and boldly
paddled out into the foaming waters. In hot
pursuit came the duskv sons of the forest, and
reaching the banks or, the swift flowing waters
they saw the white sanup nearing the- shore.
They set up cries of rags which continued
through the night When these came to his
ears he proudly lifted his head each time, and
in classical English cried back: "Howl and be
durned."
An engineer on the Danville Railway,
between Danville and Springfield, BL, has a
cat that loves railroading. For several years
tbe cat has journeyed with the engineer on his
regular runs, usually sitting in the cab window
before its master. Sometimes in fine weather
it strolls out on the pilot and lies there for
hours at a stretch, blinking at the dogs that
bark as the train thunders by. Sometimes it
climbs to tho top of the sand box. and siu
there undisturbed by the shriek of the whistlo
or tho clang of the belt Tbe cat used-to belong
to tbe engineer's wife, who is dead, and ha
wouldn't part with it for love or money. The
engine has had good lack ever since the cat
attached itself to it, and the train hands think
that it is a mascot
A Chicago man got on a State street car
the other uay. carrying in his hand a quart can
of oysters. He took a seat near tbe center of
the car and carefully slid the can under tbe
seat near the stove-pipe. Tbe conductor bad
deadened his fire with fresh coal while going
around the loop, but as tbe car bowled along
State street tbe coal caught and burned up
right merrily until the stove-lid became red
hot. Then the appetizing odor of cooking
oysters was distributed through tbe car. The
man who owned the bivalves did not realize
what was happening until it w38 too late, and
when he alighted at his destination he carried
home a dry stew instead of a quart of raw
selects.
M. F. Pappy, of Tallahassee, has an in
teresting family relic It is a hard-carved
ivory card case, of most Intricate design, being
entirely covered with cute little figures and
forms. Upon one side is represented the tomb
of Napoleon, which is clearly seen through the
droop1 1" branches ot a weeping willow, and
aboT How it are guards and various
oth inted figures. It is a mystery
ho' carved the little tomb behind the
truii. illow and mads it so perfect in
shape. (her side of tbe case shows, in the
foreground, jjongwood bouse and St Helena,
which is inclosed by a neat little fence, with
trees, houses, men, etc. In the background.
The edges and top are also handsomely carved.
This little case is an old heirloom, which has
been in the family over 50 years.
KEW YEAR'S WIT. 3
A Mother Wanted Repentant Son
Mother, you warned me, -"then I married 311s Do i
Pink, that I'd made my bed and must lie on It.
Mother-Indeed I did. 1
"Welt I shan't ask you to remake the bed, but
I do wish you'd come and superintend the cook- .
lug." SeiB Xork Weekly. 1
Stranger (to life insurance agent) I be
lieve I will take out a policy in your company.
Agent Your business, please?
Stranger I am a detective.
Agent -The premium wlU.be SO per cent less
than tbe regular list. The death risk on a de
tective is merely nominal. Pioneer Press.
Opera in Italian Mrs. Pinks (at a new
Italian opera J-Wasn't she graceful then?
Husband (eyes on Ubretta) Didn't notice. I'm
following the plot. Did the action seem to fit tho
situation and music?
Mrs. Pinks Mercy mel How can I tell? I am not
following the plot I'm watching the stage. Seio
Xork Weekly.
There are some men who cannot compre
hend that very frequently in life the game Is not
worth the candle Ben Jackson was one of them.
"That makes the tenth match you have struck.
What are looking for?' ' asked his room-mate .one
evening, as Ben was striking a match and looking
under the table. I
"I dropped a matcb.and lam trying to find It,"
replied Beu.-iexa mf lings.
r
Complimenting the Press. Quest (regis
tering his name and address, "tee Davis Jack
son, editor Paralyier, Hunker's Hollow, Ark.")
Yon compliment tbe press. 1 presume?
Hotel Clerk Compliment the press? Certainly.
You write a beautiful hand, sir; you do. Indeed.
Guests without baggage are required to pay In
advance, i'our dollars, please, Mr. Jackson.
Chicago iriiun. ' .
An Unsuccessful Seance Superstitious . 1 .
1.. tl.i...... ... .n.ll lllA J?
young ou&u itu ciaufujiiukj t jm.,w -dark
secrets of the future?
Clairvoyant With the aid of my powerful horo
scope I can, for 50 cents; but I must go Into a '
trance first.
Younr Man-All right: here's your 50 cents, and
you can get Into your trance as soon as you like. I
only wdnt to ask yoa one question. cClalrroyante
In a trance. Do Sullivan and Kllraln evermeaal
toflrht?
Clairvoyant (arousing from the trance) Here's UJ
your 50 cents young man: you must ask me some-M
tniug easier. tui ir ..
TOUB PROPOSAL.
You may make It In vernacular,
Or, If you like. In Greek;
Either lofty and oracular
Or summering and meek:
You may make It In the garden or
Beside a drygoods chute;
You may threaten ne'er to pardon her
If she rejects your suit;
You may taut it or may murmur
Like some pure, meandering stream;
You may frown at her, or term her
The Zenbhla of your dream.
Anyhow you choose to fake it
You In no wise are debarred,
If you only do not make It
On -
postal
card. .'-tt3
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