Page 10. THE CENTRE DEMOCRAT, BELLEFON TE, PA. Thursday, June 10th, 1913, BOWSER’ CANCER He Gets It In the Neck and Has | | a Narrow Escape. BUT MANAGES TO SURVIVE. After Accusing the Missis of Attempt- | ing to Kill Him by Jabbing a Poison- od Darning Needle Into His Neck and | Demanding a Divorce. By M. QUAD. @0opyright, 1012, by Associated Literary Press.) R. BOWSER woke up sighed. He sat up and groaned. He got out of bed mutter- ing. He came downstairs with a scowl ma his face and sat down to the break- fast table with a bang, and when Mrs. Powser solicitously inquired if he had been hunting for a lost collar button Be curtly replied: “A man standing on the brink of his grave doesn't feel much lke joking.” “Why, you never looked better in Four life.” “Perhaps not.” He maintained a frigid attitude dur- ng the remainder of the meal, and | she thought of the coal bill, the gas | | | | and Bill, the butcher bill and the lost elothespins and wondered where the | ghunderbolt would strike. When they | went upstairs he pulled off his coat | and vest and pulled back his collar | and sald: “I want you to look at the back of | my neck. It has pained me all night | Isn't there a lump around there some where?” “I can't say for certain,” she replied | as she inspected, “but I should think and muttered hints, Tuesday morning the “cancer” was almost full bloom, and Mr. Bowser went about with his head down as If hunting for lost pins. During the day and evening he had ten fresh poultices, and Mrs. Bowser made him gruel, tea and toast about once an hour. He had Mttle to say, but it was evident that he knew she arranged for that thing days beforehand. Wednesday morning the eancer had reached perfection and would have taken the prize at any county fair. The color was deep red, and the bard and threw out dark | ness was akin to a November pear. | Mr. Bowser took a broad of his back on position on the Nee Ing that he was helpless, the cook de cided to stay on, but held herself ready for any sudden emergency. Along to- ward evening Mr. Bowser delivered a brief address on Lucrezia Borgia. It was leveled at Mrs. Bowser, and she understood. Wanted Will Drawn. Friday morning Mr. Bowser got up with a bad hump on his back, and as he ate his tea and toast he requested Mrs. Bowser to telephone for a lawyer to draw up his will and added with considerable zest that he should leave every dollar of his possessions to found an asylum for tramps. She telephoned, but the lawyer had gone off on a hunt, and his office boy declined the job. The cat was barred out of the room all day, and word was sent to the cook that if she didn't stop banging the dishpan about the hand of justice would clutch her throat with merciless grasp. There were moments when Mr. Bowser wanted Mrs, Bowser to hold his hand and promise that she would visit his | last resting place once a week during | the rest of her life, and there were moments when he charged to run a poisoned daruing needle into { the back of his neck to cut short his The bell drawn, days. tains was muffled, the and to all cur anxious quiries the cook replied i “No, he Isn't dead yet, nor have they | sent him away to an insane asylum, but we are prepared for the worst. He may sink away as softly as a canary bird, or he may try to tear the down before he goes” house He Survives. Mr. Bowser was still alive when Sat urday morning dawned, and, although note nout he an weed that his end was near, he insisted on creeping downstairs to his favorite lounge. Mrs. Bowser had used up five pounds of flaxseed and a pint of arnica on the cancer, but was still hard at work and making no compiaints. She announced a decided with signs of a burst, but he took ne interest in her words. At noon, ever, he aroused himself and admitted improvement how \ he had not been the husband he ought | to have been and asked for forgiveness | | for his many shortcomings | ly forgave him, and an hour later he | | demanded to ‘THERR'S A LUMP THERR" Jou had been bitten by a spider There's a lump there, and it's a flery red.” “But how can I have a bite on the back of my neck?’ he demanded as he drew away. “A splder can bite you anywhere. “Spider be hanged!” he shouted. tell you I have a cancer.” “You can’t have it.” “And I'm a doomed man!™ “Nonsense! It may possibly develop nto a boll” “But what have I done to bring out ® boll? Woman, don't try to deceive | me! I have got the feeling that it's a eancer, Father and mother dled of | them.” “Your mother died of a weak heart, | and a rolling sawilog caused your fa Rher's death,” protested Mrs. Bowser. "It's either a bite or a boll and may Be gone in a day.” go ! eheerful know why she struck him with the ax as he lay ! sleeping instead of resorting to polsor The afternoon waned and evening came, and It was necessary for Mrs Bowser to visit the drug store after more flaxseed. The druggist was a kind hearted man, and he did his best to cheer her. He had had thirty years experience in the drug business, and fn all that time he had never know: a cancer on the back of the neck tn prove fatal. Such a thing taken in cor junction with a head-on collision, the collapse of a bullding or an earth quake shock had brought about direful results, but alone by itself was not greatly to be feared. The Recovery. Mrs. Bowser returned home in more spirits, and as she softl opened the front door she was alarmed | to hear Mr. Bowser dancing about and The Discovery. Mr. Bowser was not convinced. He went to the telephone to get the family doctor, but Mrs. Bowser dissuaded him by saying: i “Let it go till night and give it a ehance to develop.” “And for a cancer to seize me In its fangs!” He started for the office carrying his head stiffly, and soon after he had left the house the cook came up to say: “You'd better go downtown to see about a new cook, ma'am. If that turns out to be a cancer on Mr. Bowsers neck I wouldn't stay in this house for $100 a week. I was working for a man once who had one, and he got up in the night and tried to murder me.” Mrs. Bowser hoped against hope until 4 o'clock In the afternoon. Then Mr. Bowser came home, two hours ahead of time. She saw the glare in his eyes as he banged the hall door open, and she knew that something had blos- pomed out and become a fixture. “Do you know what this Infernal thing 1s 7’ he demanded ag be sat down on the lounge and lifted bis hands to his neck. “I'm sorry if its a cancer,” she re "Well, it is, and it will probably eause my death before the week is out! It is the opinion of the doctor that Polidn has been injected Into my Kys- tem. “But how could such a thing hap- pn?’ In Full Bloom. He stared at ber fixedly for half a minute and then bent such a ferocious : on the family cat, who stood eying mh with anxiety, that the animal ut- a hiss and fled into the parlor. Bowser at once went down to the to make a flaxweed pouitice, although it was evident that Mr. ; Ber as a would-be his r and tie off on a little argn- po appetite for dinner, during the long evening he dozed | death had passed him by. —- singing a verse of a topical song. Al the door of the sitting room she beheld him eavorting about with the eat in| his | | neck, and as she cried out in alarm he | | turned and shouted: his arms and the bandages off “She's gone! She's gone for sure!” Mr. Bowser's cancer had broken, and He cackled and laughed and chucked her under the chin; but, suddenly remembering bi | policy, he drew himself up stifily and sald: “Yes, woman, your fourteenth at tempt to assassinate me has failed, and you can instruct your lawyer to see m} lawyer tomorrow morning!” “But what did I do?” she asked. “Poisoned a darning needle as I slept and then jabbed met” “You can't believe it!" “And but for my strength of will it would have been a cancer instead of a boll. Think it over tonight and tell me in the morning how much alimony you want.” What They Want. Some men are weighed in the balance and found wanting the earth. — Philadelphia Record. The Compliment. He bad handed the child a banana. and the latter in his delight forgot his customary “Thank you.” “But what do you say, Harry?’ For a moment the child was puz gléed. Theti, with a smile, he handed it back. *Peel It!"-~New York World, Snobs and Snobs, Little Bnob-1 don't see any walters. Why don’t they wear uniforms? You ean't tell who are gentlemen and who can you? ‘Walter (sarcastically)-We waiters find no difficulty, sir.—London Optaion, A ————— the lounge and | only moved when fresh poultices were | | applied or the cat set up a wall. | ing in favor and supplanting the even | her with | getting up In the middle of the night | { this case Mrs | tante's in She free | hadn't | TP — — Good form The Afternoon Tea. | One of the most delightful ways of | entertaining and meeting all social ob ligations is the afternoon tea, which | can be given at comparatively small expense and with great enjoyment. In| fact, the afternoon tea is steadily gaip- | | ing reception in popularity. | The invitations for an afternoon ten | should be issued a week or ten days in| advance of the day set for entertain-| ing. Cards are the accepted means of | inviting and can be issued in the name of a mother and her daughters or of the wife and busband. The name of the husband appears more frequently as a joint host than In past years. A specially engraved card should take the form of the following: MR. AND MRS. JOHN ADAMS AT HOME Wednesday afternoon, December eleventh, from four until seven o'clock. Thirty-four States avenue If daughters are to receive this form is used: | MRS. JOHN ADAMS THE MISSES ADAMS AT HOME, etc. If a very informal tea Is to be given | your own visiting card, with your day at home and the hours for recelving. | can be posted The cards are sent by mall, and when a married couple are invited the cards| are addressed to the husband as well | as the wife An afternoon tea is an excellent way to introduce a daughter to society. In Adams would issue cards | and the debu If the eldest daughter, the words Miss Adams are sufficient If the ond makes her bow to society by means of an afternoon tea the full name, Mary Hall Adams, would be engraved below her mother's the name © both mother and eldest sister are used then the full nan ter appears below the sister's When a guest of he for an tea graved card be written as fol lows with her own name » name below 8M daughter Sometimes f e of the second daugh spor is the ren sd specially 0 afternoon n en wou d x je Thirty 3 ’ The first form can also be used if an added line at the bottom appears | To meet Governor and Mrs. George Gray, | ir States aven Don'ts For Visitors. Do not expect to be eatertained all | day. Let your hostess have a few | hours to herself. This can be ar | ranged If you have letters to or If you take a few walks alone Don't leave your room in disorder, and, above all, don't make your visit a big burden to the worker In the bouse, whether mistress or servant. If the former you should offer to help | in the little tasks about the home, and undoubtedly you should care for your | own room. If there Is a maid you should hang up all clothing and care | for your room so as to be po cause for a notice given to the head of the house on account of too much com pany Don't monopolize the best chair or the best place in the room just because you are politely offered it by your host. Act naturally and don’t forget that there are other beings In this world with their rights And when you arrive home don't | forget to send a little note of thanks to your entertainers, write | | for | had | Americans, | attention | ronymics. | of the border raids, | Aydrunken, { the Tyne requires no explanation Matter Enough. A young Canadian came into a pot of money and mode his first visit to England He bad been given many excellent letters of introduction. One of his letters was to a very no ble duke who Mvited him to his coun- try pluce for a week end. The newly rich Canadian boy packed his bag and went down, When door took his bag and passed it back to another man in livery, and young wan stopped in the great hall ua few moments’ chat with duke, he arrived the butler at the | the | the | Presently the duke suggested that | the visitor might like to go to Five minutes later he came tearing downstairs, yelling: “Duke! 1 say, duke! the top of bis voice. “What's the trouble?’ asked the dis- turbed duke. “My word! What has happened? matter?” “Matter!” snorted the visitor, “Il should say something Is the matter! That confounded man of yours has the impertinence to open my bag!"— Philadelphia Saturday Evening Post. The Wilds of Chicago. Foreign ignorance of America has ceased to be surprising. It has come to be taken as a matter of course by but every now and then some amusing instance occurs to call to it again. A young wo- man recently returned from sbroad says that just before she salled for home she met a party of Englishmen who were very polite and showed | great interest in her when they heard she was from Chicago “Ah, said of them. “I know all about America! You see, | have some relatives over there. have go to market in a cart must be great fun.” The girl was puzzled for a but out that his lived on west, difficulty Chicago people did not go to market in a cart In fact, she think he it Globe Democrat ves," one It 10 relatives somewhere in the far ad the in persuading him that a ranch and then she ! greatest in gave she doesn't believes St. Louis Yel Home, Sweet Home, of "Home, Sweet Home™ foward i wor A “ The song » written by John the Payne, was id in a play called of Milan,” of Charles Dick of amateur theatri first given to “Clarl, or the Ma which Payne ¢ who was fond wns the author ens, peared in this Fanny, cals Aas A young man, Bl play, in which his elder sister, took the The original playbill is of about the year 1535 “HOME, SWEET HOME!™ Sung by Miss M. Tree In “Clari, or the Maid of Milan." at the Theater Royal, Covent Garden; also Ly Miss Stephens at the Musical Festivals Composed and Arranged by Henry I. Bishop, Composer and director of the music to the 1 Covent Garden The poetry by John Howard Payne Esq for The play ha years. but the has in it a heart throb that gives everlasting life.— Judianspolis News part of Cinry heater Hoyal s been forgotten song it Northumberland Surnames, For quaint should | search the records of Northumberland A. G. Bradley has made a collection of some of Northumberiand pat He is writing of the times and there was a | Robert Unthank in those days. Among others. too. we find the name of Adam who "upset his boat In and accidentally drowned his wife, Beatrice.” Cecilia, the wife of John Unkuthman (uncouth man), cut her throat with a razor. The incident Another un- fortunate person figures as Adam-with- surnames one these the-nose.— London Spectator, Office Etiquette. If a girl is pretty and attractive she | | is sometimes offered attentions by the | men in the office, and some of these they have no business to offer and would never think of doing if they con sidered her their social equal. Be very sure that no well brought up girl in society would think for a moment of accepting an invitation to lunch alone with a married man or with any man, for that matter, who was almost a stranger to her. She would resent such an Invitation as an insult and treat the man accordingly. The working girl, IT she values her position, cannot resent such attentions very strongly, but she ean positively but firmly refuse them and show the man that she intends to be respected. Bridge Dinner Invitations. The invitations to a bridge dinner are usually informal, but they should state clearly the object of the occasion. They may read, “Dear Mrs. Jones Will not you and Mr. Jones give us the pleasure of seeing you at dinner on Thursday next at 8 o'clock? If you like, we will play bridge afterward,” or something to the same effect. Mr. and Mrs, Jones Are thus fairly warned of the fate awaiting them. If they dislike bridge, they need not ac cept the Invitation. It is best to ask eard players only, but this is not al ways possible. Card Usage. At a small reception cards are left as at a large affair. It is not out of place to bid the hostess adieu at a small in- formal tea. At a large ome it is not ECZEMA SPREAD RAPIDLY OVER FACE | And Head. Raw and Red. Ears, Legs and Hands Also Afflicted. Thought Child Would Die. Cuti- cura Remedies Completely Cured, Btewartstown, Pa. — “Cuticura Soap and Ointment cured my little boy of that awful disease oczeroa. When about five yoars old It started on the left side of his face In a small pimple forming yellow mat. ter. It soon spread rapidly over his fice and head. It got as raw and red as Sannel, Ry, SS \ £15 [FES i if i i i : ] | 2 i 4 : : i if o i if § 5 jit 7 Lo | ES li i | : i his | oom. 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When I found Dr. [sult of contraction of the fibrils or Eczema Ointment I found | muscular f re of the heart, or of par- This ointment is the formu- | of direct and al- vary with the cur- duration of contact through body: and currents low frequen. more dangerous than wer animals are more electric shock than man, illed by a direct In the aver we are able to do your | Man a direct cu ” if 1 Voils is a | scarce felt, 200 00 voits give prices | 1, mus Ar Crami wi 5 nie ov Voits Why Electric red- | While every | “lectric Causes Death, ‘ Knows that erful enough, will very few who from a English on is simple shock, is the re. ity 01 an shock Ma . nre and ent rity the 1) ¢ whole five years ing. All t hie cure.” eff ects rrents an experiment. That the why we cAn guarantee it. All drug- or by mall. Price 50c. Pfeiffer Co., Philadelphia Bt Sold by C. M. Parris, Ady the hemical ouls, mmte.- and Belle. June ing 8 ARs Don 1 f« reget LLY printing on short notice, Tig ’ $A or You | minute, | Success in Life From the Pennsylvania State Normal School is evidence that its holder is a teacher thor- oughly trained and equipped to fill the best positions. $195 covers all expenses— excepting books—for one school year for those preparing to teach. Modern Buildings and Every Comfort. Thirty-ninth Year begins September 9th, 19i 3. Write for the big beautifully illustrated catalog. Address the Principal Dr. James E. Ament, ! Indiana, Pa. ““Yes-We've Got It BREE | Anything you want in the way of builders’ tools and build. ers’ Hardware. And we've got another thing too, that wears hard: That's ATLAS Portland Cement. It's the same quality of cement that Uncle Sam just ordered five million barrels of, for the Panama Canal. They've got the best engineers in the world there and they certainly know what they're doing. A fa # 5 pK Z Olewine’s Hardware BELLEFONTE, PA. ds GAT A L 7 LG / NONE JUST AS GOOD / EE FITZ-EZY THE LADIES SHOES «- THAT - CURES CORNS
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