Thursday, March 9th, 1911, ht te a — FACT, FUN AND FANCY. Bright, Sparkling Paragraphs—Selected and Original. SOME NEW LIMERICKS. | She always addressed him as Mr. | Until he took courage and Kr. | But now that they've wed | Like a brute he has sald | That he wished to goodness he'd Mr. | A young lady who lives {in Adair Tried to sneak out of chur:h during prayer, | But the squeak in her shoes Annoved those in their pews, Be she sat in the aisle in despair, There lived a young lady Who was s0 excessively That when she To sip lemonade She slipped through fell in A girl who was wearing a sheath Her name, I belleve, was Miss Keith Bald, “If this thing should split I will sure throw ft, Fer there's not much neath” in Lynn, thin, essaved the straw and n very under- Force of Habit.—"You know pretty salegirl I took home from the dance?” “Yes" “Well, I stole a kiss.” “What did she “Wil that be all?” | that say 7" » ’ * Postscript. —Little there's a girl at out school whom we eall Postscript,” “Postscript! What do you call her Postscript for?" Lit- tle Johnny-—"'Cos her name is Ade- Mune Moore" Johnny-—"Dad, Opened ‘With Prayer. to be operated on for asked that a minister be surgeon inquired why minister present. He wish to be opened with * AJ * Wanted an Excuse~—"Why break your engagement with ths school teacher?” the friend. “If I failed to show house every evening bring a written excuse mbther." man about appendicitis sent for, Th he wanted a replied: “I prayer.” A did you she Heavy dabs of A mpl Serve to When wads of it isn't . J . Wanted to K the druggist sleeply inquired his bed oom wind “This drug store, ain't who had ru What do you in your city shee where is now. What ¥ Lived There, Too~—An tourist, traveling in Irel Ing shown the sights, and places visited were the and the Devil's Be owns a good des of | remarked Fist to *he must an important this country.” “Yer honors was the prompt reply, “but rest of the landlords’ his home England.” American the jarvey, erson ir right,” the in be ike is \J A » Life.~—A draw would he asked that teacher slcture pictu Her Aim in her class to a which they like to be when grown up pupils went diligent. to work, some drawing pictures of | soldiers, policemen, fine ladles, etc. | bb WAAL Bl el Rip GLE of Mttle girl, who sal quietly holding her pad and n hand The! teacher, observ asked: “Don't you know wl y want to he wher you grow - replied the know how married.” . \ Couldn't Tell Which Philadelphia tt he aemile man ment eurre the you, ploy es a was ray" “Splendid “Py X *In ds find or a gral The Wrong Man" perter,” sald he brisk to put me 4 we get ir morning self should lar gold hard Dor Pay no att you to ter 1} y “Yon ports r next more awakened mg: “Ro exclaimed porter trousers ROKT closet 8 bandage, arm in drummer "i didn’t you put me « "What!" g the p up, as | bulged from his head “Was you gemman dat giv’ me a five dollar gold plece?' “Of course I was idiot!" “Well, den, be foah Lord, who was dat gemman I put off at Syracuse? the Are sight Why Cyra 4 sped irter jumping 8 SAVER de you de Had Felt so Himelf, gustodian of the team tn an Ohlo town, was a small, talka- tive Individual with a receding chin and a two for five grin on, all the time, and wl wins very familiar at all times with everybody's business but his own, drove the physician In toe the country night where the physician's services were needed In a confinement case, at the home of one Mr. Blank. Next morning the phy. sician ascertained by ‘phone status of his case, then sent his man “Dockey.” of a physician ons rections. Dockey, through no fault of his own, concelved the notion that the patient had the grippe, so with a8 world of confidence in himself and armed with the medicine, and, as he thought, a great deal of responsibility, and sure she had the grip, never stopped until he was at the bed-side of the patient. “Well, how are you this morning? he asked. The pa- tient, of course, hesitated. “Oh! 1 know you feel pretty tough,” contin. wed ey.” “I know Just exactly bow you feel, Mrs, Blank. I was up agin’ the same thing twice last winter | bank | poisoning | oysters i Hall, the | the | “Dockey’ with some medicine and di. | Rishel | we hope may be continuous, {attributed as the OVER THE COUNTY. wins horn to Colyer, east of morning of last Hall to in the ‘near building is to he A Bon William Tuesday Mill Mr, and Old Fort, week, have a national future, A new erected for its in | cupancy. Clarence rowly Swartz, of escaped death caused by a sale, Saville, from eating niar- ptomaine canned at Miss Elizabeth Bottorff, after spend _ | ing the winter at Scotia, Wednesday, of last burg, to remain permanently, Mrs, Sarah J. Kerlin, of Centre I= thinking of moving to Haver hill, Mass, where her daughter Miss Nellle, and son Edwin, are located. scar Greenst returned week, to Philips- Bowersox has urg to State ion of the he purchased Henry rone Mills buving Mra. 86 i= preserved other the Ledger G. H Barrack flouring goods Hall, The B. Hos tots moved College, Ewing some from taking property time ago. known Ty- stock dealer, was in Pine Grove last week, and succeeded in up a bunch of nice fat cattle Mary McClellan, at the age of of the most active, well ladies in Philipsburg, or town, for that matter, says which Hoover, a well one any Miller, the successor of Harry miller in the Weber mills, moved his household from Linden Hall to Centre last week. smoki terman, destroved 8 stored ns house belonging of Aaronsburg, was by fire recently, in Hosterman's ent R to had to lose 3 He horse last week had Just chased a team, and before he remove-theny from. the pide them ne pur could § one of | expired, The Rev. Rot re in the 0) | Oy for the Big 1} and oan Wigwam the church an McK. Relley of the new recently, was de nits the men and The reception given by board of St. Paul's M. E its mastor, the Rev, J in the assembly room church at State Ce attended by college and Methodist Wi of the church Ellas Stover on moved Inte Robert Young's in Miliheim. Ralph Halnes into W. H Musser's home, by Mr. Stover. O. E Hed cated the Dr. Frank farm, and left for IMinols on Monday Harry Gl more, of near Rebersburg, will occupy the Dr. Frank farm Dr. George Rishel, son of Mr Rishel, of Benner township, has quite {11 at his home In Philadelphia In a recent letter received by Mr it was learned that his condi. was somewhat Improved, which lege over 300 at of men last Thursday property will move vacated kman va tion A breaking down of the system Is cause of his all eral ment, On Friday evening of last week, a sledlond of the respected citizens home of Calvin J. Weaver (Miller) at Wolfes Store, The evening wag spent In a very pleasant manner. He. fore retiring Mra. Weaver served the refreshments for the evening, which consisted cream, oake, candy and fruit. The party was royally entertained by Mr, and Mra. Weaver, myself. I sympathize with you 1 know Just how you feel” and Invited back again, The music Mrs, | on | QC~ 1} i | ciple Ia chicken supper at on | {| Tyrone, John | been | of Hebersburg, enjoyed a sledride to the | THE CENTRE DEMOCRAT, BELLEFONTE PA. T | of the evening was furnished by Kenneth Haines and Walter M. | Weaver, | John B. Hess, an old Centre county { boy, has been appointed post-master | bo) { at DuBois, Mr. and Mrs. DPruce Struble, of | State College, are rejoicing over the | arrival of a young son, which came | there on Tuesday evening. Miss Nelle Struble, now down taking care of her sister, Mrs. Wm. Fishburn, who Is confined to her bed with Inflammatory rheuma- tiem, The Ladies’ Ald society of the Dis church of Blanchard will serve the home of Mrs Thomas Bechtel in that plage Sat urday evening, March 11, begining at b o'clock, — near Rock, Is Mrs. Grant Blowers, but now of Steubensville, Ohio, Is spending a few days at his brother's Hiram Blowers, of Altoona, and brother-in-law, Calvin Sharer, of with a view of locating there, near there soon, Frank KR. Olding, a veterinary geon, of Philadelphia, arrived at How- ard this week and will locate there permanently for the purpose of prac- ticing his profession in that commun ity. There was a good opening there as OC. M. Fox, the former veterinarian, has retired from the fleld. Mr. Old- ing is regarded as a skilled man in his line of work Shaffer, ill for or Bure. of Lock Haven, gome time, has go far recovered as to be about again Mr. Shaffer is 81 years of age, and has been a resident of Lock Haven for a good many years, says the Dem ocrat. He is a native of Madison burg, and a genial old gentleman | whom frequently n and have a chat with In Belle Jonathan who has been we | direction { bar | trich, | Spring Twp.; | B3, Spangler, {land In Spring Twp.; $7500, | of Philipsburg, | his | | Twp.; { county ito REAL ESTATE TRANSFERS, | H. W. Bheffer et al to A. 8, Wil. | | Hams, March 10, 1906, tract of land in | | Worth Twp.; $200, Mary CC, Harris et al to H, tre Co.; $100, H. White et al to Dec. 22, 1510, tract Walker Twp.; $709.80. N. B. Spangler et Meek, Feb, 1911, 7600, Valentine Jan. 28, John H. of M, land in ux tract to of Geo, land in { * Deborah KE et 1011, al to tract N. of Florence nie RN. R. inthurst, Dunkle et March Jon- tract bar 30, to 1801, | of land in Howard Twp.; $426, Orndort, | J. J. Orndorf June 18, 1904, Twp.: $25, Sophia Hale to Wo. 1 2, 1010, tract of and In ob Fletta land to tract of in Haines tiddle, April Philipsburg; rR Hainer et ux to Hugh Moore, Nov, 21, 1908, tract of land In $300 Lawrence BE. Eckley Rider, Feb. 21, 1011, Spring Twp.; $660, W. F. Courter et al, to J. R. Ream- er, March 12, 18086, tract of land in Liberty Twp.; $12. Rush M. in to tract Annie of land Who Shall Decide? the last two or three vears Quarter Sessions Court of Mifflin has held that under the law within its discretion to refuse grant any licenses at all, and on Monday it rejected all applications, During the it in {as it had done in previous years. The Bessions has just its Quarter county within cense Court of ruled that discretion to to a man who will not obey a of the court to close his midnight or any other hour which shows that judges as as doctors sometimes disagres ind that the irt that wants a pre- edent can generally find to Its Laste Dauphin it is not refuse a li- at of co one Normal, Summer Summer Blanchard April ff eight & lear and steady PD. For the e in the fame oy Family Favorite Lamp Oil otless— Costs ur dealer has it no n aey Y its ba y Oil " sav Waverl orks Co.— Independent Refimors ds, Saves Pittsburg, Pa. e than inferior tank reis direct from our re sgon kin Also makers of Waverly Bpecial Auto Ol snd Waverly Gasolines. Interest Is Mailed Every Six Months at the rate of Four Per Cent. per annum, to holders of our Certificates of Deposit, These convenient forms of investment are issued in CAPITAL AND and present many attractive features, at the date of issue, and certificates are renew able without surrender at the expiration of each six months period. There are no commissions or fees—a straight 4% investment, absolutely safe, and ayailable at any time as collateral at this bank, up to its full face value Write for special booklet on this sttractive investment. Pittsburgh Bank for Savings Smithfield Street and Fourth Avenue, Pittsburgh, Pa SURPLUS £1,000,000.00. sums of $500 and upward, Interest begins VT a lll a — If ye Telephone Your Telegrams u are a Bell subscriber say to the operator “TELEGRAM” and she will connect you with an office of the Western Union which will immediately Telegraph Co. transmit your telegram, night letter or cablegram. Bills for telegrams will be included on your regular monthly telephone bill At night, on Sundays or holidays, when the local telegraph office may be closed, the elegra © ny The Bel will conhect its subscribers with an open telegrams will be made. ar charge for ompany est. ern Union office without additional charge Telegrams, night letters and cablegrams may be sent and paid for from Public Telephones. Public tele phone agents in charge will explain the method of payment. Every Bell Telephone a Telegraph Station gen | i I. Cure | i tin, Jan, 10, 1911, tract of land in Cen- | Dei- | R. | i wreull do — Build: d ove ' suldings covered over twenty years ago are as g and have never needed repairs. Fireproof — Stormproc some — Inexpensive. For further detailed informati Local Dealers or Cortright Metal Roof ing Co., Philadelphia, Pa. LANDRETHS’ SEEDS WHICH are not sold by a Merchant in BELLEFONT & SUCCEED. Write for the Best Catalog Printed Consequently we hope tw sell our Beeds to yo direct by Mail, : This advertisement mailed to us, if paper i tioned, will be taken as worth 20, on any of One Dollar ($1) or over, and the coup closed with Beeds on first order, if returned to us, will be worth One Dollar ($1) on a Five D (35) order. Bay if Market or Priv To every One Dollar ($1) order will be adds to introduce them, without charge, each of three especially desirable sor ste Gardener BRISTOL, Pennsylvania, one pack Y egetabl work abou as we aj our charges We know how steam Nn general house We are _skillf the respor work right A. E. SCHAD. take IT IS HABIT That Counts. Thirty cents a day is one hundred dollars per year. Why not try the saving habit. mach Young man, have vou ever had this money i YOu nave not, try The First National Bank, Bellefonte,’ Pa. — I Ee a iat OURSCHOOLSHOES The Shoes that make so many trips to School must have sturdy qualities, and they must be comfortable and good looking Shoes, as well. Our Boys’ School Shoes- AK INg ana i in every uppers Wan Son and sol h proofs « Our Girls’ School Shoes-- are also. unusual values. Several choice Perfee jen in School Shoemaking Blue! or A The Show ® no detail omitted that UR. 1 n nt are ud “re ton. Lace or style. foot better them formed We're up in the ‘School Shoes business, but not up In prices. Test our School Shoes. A. C. Mingle, Allegheny St. Bellefonte, Pa. Fire, Lite Accident abd Tornado TEMPLE COURT HARRY FENLON, INSURANCE Baccessor 10 Predoriok K. Poster and William Baroside BELLEFONTE. PA, THIS AGENCY represonts the Anion Bre IDNECRB0E COMPAn. tes In the world. We are pre. pared fo write large lines st John F. Gray & So
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