,. 14 EVENING HJBLIO LEDGER PHILADELPHIA, TUESDAY, APRIL 30, 1918 loltoblkUe&sei: fUBLIO LEDGER COMPANY CYRUS H, K. CtmTI8. ParainrsT, CUrVa 11 I.udlnKton Vice PrMldMiti John C MaSTii. Secretary and Trraiurert rhlllpll Colllna, X&m m witii. . iAkn l SMiman. Ulrcctora. rnnvtnlll. noATID Ctatia II K. Ccti. Chairman DAVID K, SMI LKT Kgltnr JOHN C HATITIM General nualneaa Manager t rubllahwf daily at I'cbUo Lmkjeu liulMlM. Independence Square, rhll"lJnl.Vu,...iii ?7i2?is. .'.'.. .......inoii'rton hum in SkmSS.. ..":...'... 1S0S Tribune Dutldlntf NEW8 DUnEAUSi vrsiiiimi.f liire. , . .,, .,, fct. .. N, K. Cor, rennaylranla. Aw. ana in,, VW Tonic liru TlwilS.lon TimA Ixpo.s Bcaiuc Iniion ii" sunscniPTioN tbiuih Th Kteiino 1'r.auo Lepou '""Sr towns SSi'ui"fr.nntf; wjW. Vf .month. 8i 0) dollara per rear. "', J", aZfla? per o all forclfn countries one (U dollar rer owfr-Subacrtwr. wl.hlnc '"!" chanted mutt iHv old a well aa new addrcin. BELL. JMO WALNUT KEYSTONE. MAIN jj0 Isr AMrtn oil rommualcnlloni -to Kj" h7" Ledger, Independence Sauorc. rnllodfipnia. accnMi cU" ""' MTTt a. rhlUdelphla. TufidiJ. Ap'U JO. l' WHEN IS A STATUTE A LAW? SENATOR VARE Insists that tho law ma. nv mnn to vote In a Republican primary who did not vote for a majority of tho nominees on mo Keuuui.u ..,.. ,last fall. Ho nays that all of (he plain voters who cast a Town Meeting ballot last fall win bo welcomed In tho Republican prl- ,,marles and no questions asked. He announces that If any 01 tno iran i Meeting party leaders attempt to voto In k " fr." ... . i t. Ill Va mm. i line Rcpuhlican primaries mj ... " " 1 '.. . .I--. !... ..nta.l fnf II 111.1- pelied lu swear uiai mti . - jorlty o: tho Republican nominees. His view of the law seems to bo that it a voter Is willing to support the Vara n.ri fnrtlnn It can be Ignored, but If you tnro opposed to his faction It must be enforced. In brief, law Is to be Juggled In the Inter est of factional politics, and It can be ignored at the will of factional leaders. nt the flection laws are not tho only ! , statutes toward which our political lead ers show disrespect. The I'Miaaeipnia me ory and practice Indicate that a law Is a law only when it serves your purposes. Is It any wonder that the I.'avy Depart ment had to Intervene In the vlco situation? tt. OUillo MiJ nmfc iic w...j -.. ...-. If falls to the mothers. c... .... .t.... im nnl,. tiii wnr prrtsR t" ' THE KAISER'S HAND IN RUSSIA ; pHE apparent determination of tho Gcr '. JL mans to make onen war upon the Bol- 'ahevikl under the maijk of a new royalist mnivmunt Is the final attestation of some- Xthlng Inherently decent In the policies of ,.ihe forlorn revolutionists in Russia. The counter-revolution, through which the Grand Duke Alexis has been declared J emDeror at Petrocrad, oDVlousiy nas oeen I? engineered by the aristocrats, royalists. hureaucrats and the wealthy clleues tno t real anarchists, the samo mob that has been pro-German from tho first, that sold out the Russian masses and delivered xdes of unarmed peasants to the German IU nachln guns. Irho stability of a monarchy In Russia wt ! mt would reoresent merely a German con- V,.T.. .. . , Jiuest of the entire country by proxy. ' H Thei naelflst tendencies of the BolshC- f. tvlfrl mnr nnw ptirinrp the ultimate test. IK t. HiMti.llnnlDla m.lcl HII7-1- t1 At I" flTlil ifriknH tn tViA Hprrrnrtation out of which I!' Jjjey tried to lift Russia, or they must fight r; 'Vld. ngnt liara. xneir oniy alternative is to die. Slogan for war gardeners: ShelI-our ft eirn peas while the soldier shells the Hun. WOMEN IN THE MINES 1HERE Is nothing een In a revised -bubllc opinion which will tolerate the jfciployment of women and girls at the mines and coal breakers. The operators I who attempted this experiment near Hazleton and were promptly blocked by proper objections from the United Mine "Workers and the State Department of f Mines iae merely shown that constant vlcllance will be necessary If the safe- I' .... ...V.lr.1. ......moll. etirrnunrl tnmai1 gUHlUa WlliVill huiiiiuiij cu.ivM.iu ..w. and children in Industry are not to be broken down by employers under the plea lv of war necessity. The Intention of the existing labor laws I; is to protect women and children not Is only against unusual hazards, but also to keep them safely out of such employments as involve unusual stress or an environ ment unfitted to them. The work of tho coal mines, therefore, must be done by , men. The Kaiser prayed In the Cologne Ca thedral. And the roof didn't fall on him ! SEEING PHILADELPHIA "XTOW and then when the usual crowd t of trusting voyageurs from, the hin terland paes, stark with wonder, upon the vehicle Ttnown to the light-minded folk as a rubber-neck wagon, thoughtful persons Mmtut occasionally regard them with a touch of pity and a sense of confidence outraged. They are made to believe that they are seeing Philadelphia. Yet they tra carefully steered by the chauffeur and the megaphone man to everything that J makes us seem a lordly town and as con sistently denied a glimpse of the things 'tkat indicate the darker side of our char acter. Thus every rubber-neck wagon Is trun dled to the Betsy Ross House, where a (MSfTOf reverence and tender care Is nicely 'atmulated. Hut the wagon never proceeds 't Mount Morlah Cemetery, where Betsy's "P.vo Is desolate, forgotten and without augment or attention., The very flag that Btay made has been worn down to a giy remnant by the winds above her h4stone. It might be good for the collective oul n( Wtjladelphla, If we were to be franker visitors. The folk from back home , jrmltted to stare and marvel at the - Hll tower They are never permitted the cracks in it and no- one hints & dreadful things that happen within. are permitted, to see the Mayor's room, but there la no chauffeur to let them know that the munWlpal government ia in Ub lV& P WlIAT IF THE GERMANS DO REVOLT? 'TWOSE who Interpret tho discontent of the German prisoners captured In tho war and the reports of demoralization nmong German business men as proving that there is an impending revolution against tho Hohcnzollcrns are unduly optimistic. There is no more profitless occupation than generalizing from insuf ficient data nnd there is no amusement more dangerous when the world is at war. Whatever the future may hold for Germany, It would be a grievous mistake for any of the nations fighting her to assume that they are to win the war through an attack on the German rcur by the people at home. Belief in the pos sibility of such an attacl: was enter tained for a time in some quarters in this country. We nnnounced that we were the allies of the German people in the fight against their Government. But wc have learned that, whether willingly or vnwillingly, the German people arc fighting heart and soul the battles of the Prussian militaiist party and that Ger many is ruled by military law. Even though the people should revolt, the Allies would still have to crush tho Ger man military organization. No other course is safe in any event. There can be no peace until the Ger man military machine is destroyed. Lloyd George already perceives this, for he says that the events of the last few weeks have made it plain to every think ing man that there is no longer room for compromise between the ideals of autoc racy and those of democracy. They arc in the grip of death and one or the other must succumb. We are slowly perceiving the truth on this side of tho ocean nlso. It is under stood that Secretary Baker intends to ask for appropriations for an army of 3,000,000 men to be shipped to France as fast as it can be trained. But we should not accept this as the final estimate of the number of men needed. If 3,000,000 are not enough we must train 5,000,000, and if more are needed we must be ready to put them in the field. The German drive for the Channel ports which has been going on for forty days will not be stopped until it is blocked by an irresistible force. The German strategists have evidently de cided to pile men into the fight, regard less, of terrific losses, in the hope that they can break through. They may suc ceed. But this will not mean a German victory, for the democracies of the world are not yet exhausted and the greatest of them has not yet begun to mobilize its great resources. If the Germans should reach the Channel, however, there would be a feel ing of great exultation in Berlin and the task of the Entente Allies would become greater. The Germans have been taught that they are tho chosen of the Germtm god to rule the world through the sur vival of the fittest and they would inter pret such an outcome as proof of divine favor. But there is no hope for the world till the Huns are taught that the German god is merely n tribal deity and does not control affairs beyond the tribal frontier. On the same day that Lloyd George's statement was published the reports of addresses made by the American labor delegates in England appeared in the newspapers. These addresses indicate that labor has discovered what the rest of us have learned, namely, that there i3 np hope for German democracy until the military autocracy is uprooted and that there is no hope for assistance from Ger many in the work of uprooting until the war ends. When the rest of the world is made safe for democracy the Germans may attempt to put such safeguards around democracy at home as will pro tect it against the autocrats armed with a gun. Our task is to smash the iron machine that rules the German people. Camden has already far oversubscribed its third loan quota. Crepe, boy, for the grinds who used to write Jokes about Cam den. THE FLAG WINS THE CROSS OF WAR TTfHEN' the flag of the 104th Regiment ' ' of the Massachusetts National Guard was decorated with the cross of war by tho French in recognition of its alor we had a splendid Illustration of the way they do things in France. That regiment now has a distinction which cannot be taken from It, for as Henri Bazln, the correspondent of the Evening Pi-nuc IiEDOEn, who reported the event, says. It Is the first body of American fighting men to be thus distinguished. The French know that esprit de corps can be devel oped by such simple expedients and that there Is no more valuable asset for an army. Not only was tho regimental flug decor ated, but tho cross was given to 118 of tho officers and men because of their he role exploit In repulsing a superior Ger man force In a battle lasting for three days. We have devised a det ration for our soldiers, but we are not so quick In award ing It as we should be. Perhaps we shall learn from our gallant and poetic allies the value of expedition In such matters. The twelfth keel has been laid at Hog Island. The thirteenth probably will be down before some of the grumblers hae time to realize that by beating the world In matters like this we shall beat the Kaiser. THE MARKET VALUE OF HATE THE hate quatrain that won a $1000 prlzo In Germany as "the best four line poem denouncing England's baseness" seems to us strangely lacking In calories. Is It possible that the author did not really hate England, but only pretended Uo for the sake of winning the prize? If we were writing venom at 540 a word we could amass a deal of passion in each heavily milled syllable. But, after all, hymns of hate seem a puny kind of propaganda. They only serve to put the enemy on his guard. If he knows you hale him with a full $1000 worth of hate he'll surely keep his powder dry. What the Germans ought to do Is to offer some prizes for really convincing love ,poems about England. Maybe that would fool the British fleet so that all the battleships would haste to drydock and wreathe themselves with smllax. If we were trying a UP00 quatrain to blut the Kaiser we'd start on' a more genial key, seeking to lure him within reach of, our brass knucks. As thus: We lov you, dear William, you grow on us so; We'd Uke to bo neighborly; chummy, you know. Don't be so canny, O don't be so strange Come a bit closer, Bill, get within -range! Hut what grieves nnd aggravates tho Get man patrons and purveyors of hate Is that they can't get tho English to hate back. Tho mcan-splritcd fellows simply won't hnte the way they ought to. Tho kaiser, sitting down to pen u lyric or so, might express his disgust ns follows: I do not like thooc weak disdains, This lukewarm disaffection ; If you dislike me. take Mime pains. Be MKAN In my direction! Come'Vrerce me with a rcd-hcM : damn, And If ou hato me. "ATU " A British flying ofilccr says the air over the western front Is as crowded with nlrcraft as Fifth acnuc Is with motors. If he could see Market street on a Saturday afternoon he might change his metaphor. SMITH, IIYLAN AND COMPANY I N NEW YORK they are not nny hap- i.ier with their Mayor than we here are with ours John IMrroy Mltchel left the Wicked City with an admirable sys tern of municipal service. Mr. Hjlnn, his successor, Is a politician of the ort ac customed to icgnnl nny community pri marily as an nujunct to a political machine. So, heartened by the applause- of his friends from Tammany, he Is behaving as If the civil service were a cathedral and he a kaiser out upon a blithe holiday The laughter, ribald nnd shrill, that New York has been turning on us lately might now be echoed nt the expense of the cliff dwellers In Mr. Hylan's town. And It would be rosy to indulge In the sort of sarcasm which brightened Idle hours for New York Journalists when they first dls coered that wo were corrupt nnd con tented. But the present situation I oo broadly suggestive, too generally Inclusive, for that. Surgeon General Gorgas, It appears, has Intervened In New York on grounds of general welfaic, Ju..t as Secretary Daniels Intervened recently In Philadelphia. Gen eral Gorgas wishes to stop a demoralizing process Instituted by Mayor Hylnn In the Department of Health. The army, you might suppose, hasn't enough to do In training millions of new soldiers nnd fight ing the Germans and caring for Its wound ed. It mubt find time to go about the country dragging the Smiths nnd tho Hylans out of their mudholes and teaching them to walk straight and to be at Iert temporarily decent. These new responsibilities that we are crowding on the military establishment are profoundly suggestive. The . merlcan peo ple are sending their sons out In countless thousands to fight and die for n theory of government which they themselves con sistently disregard nnd de').r-e In their per sonal practice every election day. German propaganda Is not permitted In America. But party propaganda, Intended to defeat nnd degrade every principle of free government, is taken for granted and systematically encouraged. The Tammany system In New York, like the system upon which tho Vares are build ing their machine In Philadelphia, is tho result of a secret organization, which in cludes ward workers, division leaders, newspapers, neighborhood physicians. Job holders, business men and contractors, all of whom are grouped to prevent the ex pression of community opinion In local government. They are enlisted for their own purposes and not for tho Interests of the municipality. It Is the habit of writers nowadays to say that political bosses are necessary- Po litical bosses may be said to be necessary when the people finally admit that they themselves are not fitted for self-government. The Smiths and the Hjlans are not pe culiar to New York. They are every where. And they are not accidental. Mayor Smith represents the civic consciousness of Philadelphia Just as truly as Mayor Hylan represents the civic consciousness of New York. The one, shamed by tho Secretary of the Navy Into a performance of his duty, and the other, who must be stopped by Federal authority from Imperil ing tho health of the citizens and the mili tary organizations for the take of his Job hungry friends, are fairly representative of what we often produce In tho way of municipal administration after more than a hundred years of experience with free government. Prowling ward heel .MojumrnlnK l era, under the orders Still There of Acting Superintend ent Mills, are not to lie lc In the station houses after this. The city might lie hnppler If Captain Mills refused to let the heelers o'lt The revolution In Fin No. Say land is about over, Hope In l'lnnUlifd with the Kalser'f friends In a position of advantage. It might be said, In other words, that Hunlsm in this Instance has Flnlanded on Its feet. "We owe our armies a Anil Iieail Mm great debt," says the Cannot Collect Kaiser. When money Is low pay your obli gations with golden words! Is hate a fashion, a Neither! lt' craze, a fad or a the National Game means of amusement In Germany? A German o.Mlcer who lost his temper at Ills Dutch landlady told her to beware the Ides of August. About that time, he cried, Germany will put Holland In her hip pocket. The beginning of August la a kind of sacred date for Huns. It was at that time of year they began murdering Belgians. ' Why Is It so hard to persuade Mis sourlans to sit In the Senate? Aren't Mis souri meerschaums, known to tho vulgar as corncob pipes, permitted in that august par liament? Rlttmelster von Rlchthofen said that the Allied aviators are pretty good fliers, but a little too eager to attack. Not bad praise from an expert source. The Oerpians are cruel to take sand from Holland. Sand Is Just what the Netherlands Cabinet seems to need. Mr. Gerard says the Oermans don't laugh any more. Why should they? The next memoirs we are waiting for are those of the Kaiser Karl's mother-in-law. Would they come across more readily If they were asked to buy Liberty Bombs? THE ELECTRIC CHAIR Volja for Women DUNRAVEN BI,EAK has compiled ten rules about women which he says nro Infallible. Wo have some hesitation in printing anything Infallible In this depart ment, becauso some one Is sure' to contra dict It, but here goes: 1. Women think second-hand bookstores nro "dirty." 2. They are very witty, but they have no sense of humor. 3. They nsk unanswerable questions and then answer them. 4. They are nnnoylngly pretty. 5. They cat too much. C. They believe what they say and say It too often. 7. They marry somo one else. S. They like the houso to be "tidy." 9. They think you can't get on without them. 10. You can't. James How, tho "Millionaire Hobo," returned recently from a peace conference at Stockholm carrying a wicker sultcaso and a nut cracker. He will need the nut cracker, undoubtedly; but what Is tho suitcase for? Apparently there Is a peaco conference In Stockholm almost every d.iv. The Stockholm police force must be kept busy preserving order. Suitcases are made either of sole leather or wlckerwork like people's heads. Just ns soon us tho United Soviets de cided on that new Russian flag tho Czare vitch goes and spoils It all, Lord Ilhnnddi Ilrltlnh food controller, made 111 by aelf-dcnlat News l)li itch "TVO YOU want to bo like Lord L Hhnndda? Of hunger he grew ever fondda, Until he wns yallery With loss of calory Then buy one more Liberty Boiulda! DOVE DULCET Little Willie Hall decided to do with out the bicycle ho had been saving for and buy a Liberty Bond instead He bought tho bond, nnd then some well meaning person came along nnd spoiled It by giving him tho bicycle anywa. The meaning of sacrifice is to do with out something, to surrender for an un selfish purpose something one holds dear If tho philanthropist who Insisted on stultifying Willie's flnc-hcarted patriotism really wanted to do the right thing sho should hno bought him another Bond. One of the new German tanks has the skull and crossbones painted on it, Tho German high command seems to recognize the peculiar npproprlateness of that emblem for Its cause. We will never again make Jokes about ferryboats. Tho Iris and the Daffodil, two of the vessels that Immortalized themselves in the raid on Zcebrugge, were formerly municipal ferries on the Mersey, at Liver pool. Thousands of Americans have crossed over to Birkenhead on them, on the way to Chester and Oxford. Monday, May 6, Is the Crown Prince's birthday, when ho attains tho golden age of thlrty-slx. We hope Crowny will live long enough to read the birthday poem we are brewing for him. If anybody else feels tho urge to go us one better In such a gentle ralutatlon Socrates will be glad to examine tho manuscript. We will mall the most potent to Willie by partial post. A big oversubscription to the Third Lib erty Loan would be a nice kind of biith day present for Crowny. As the loan cam paign ends on May 4, he'll be able to read all about It In the Berlin papers on his birthday morning. Ask the Man Who Loans One A dollar In the hand Is wprth thiee In your friend's pocket. That new Pershing shoe the American tioops are wearing Is said to be "Ueber Alles in der Welt." SOCRATES. THE NATIONAL PASTIME THE editor of the New York Suu's weekly Hook Section, confined to his literary funk hole by the mumps, has amused himself by drawlnc up International baseball teams, composed of authors His English line-up Isn't so bad. He has Wells n pitcher; Chesterton, catcher; Ben nett, first base ; Conrad, second base ; Gals worthy, third base; Kipling, shortstop; May Sinclair, Rebecca West and Hden Phllpotts, fielders Ho endears himself to us by saying that William McFee will go on the first nine when Kipling retires. Ho picks Thomas Hardy as manager and (Incredible) George Moore, that long exploded and fusty George, as coach. Personally, wo would take out his battery, putting Hllalre Bclloc on the mound and Gilbert Murray behind the plate. Wp would pass Galsworthy to the bench, nnd put Chest erton on the third sack. Miss Rebecca West would leld to K. V. Lucas In the center garden And our choice for manager and coach would be Barrle and Shaw. Now for the American team ! The Sun's literary editors mumps have badly dis heveled his Judgment. Think of an all American literary nine In which neither Vnchel Lindsay nor Edgar Lee Masters Is mentioned; nor Hon Marquis nor Tom Daly! (And Tom used to play ball for Fordham, too ) We refuse to reprint the Sun's line up for the American team, but nere It Is as we would man It: Tarklngton, pitcher; Amy Lowell, catcher; Don .Marquis, first base ; Vachel Lindsay, second base ; Mar garet Deland, third base ; Simeon Strunsky, shortstop; Irvln Cobb, Tom Daly and Ed Hone, fielders. Edgar Lee Masters, manager, and Mary Roberts Rlnehart, coach. And for umpire? The Sun offers no sug gestion. We would choose Garabed Glra gosslan. What a Change! One cannot refrain from comment on one remarkable change time has wrought between eighteenth nnd nineteenth cen tury civilization nnd that of the present dav. News dispatches tell that the Elysee Palace and the Hotel Champs Elysee Paris, have been taken over by the American expeditionary- forces, the buildings to be used as offices and quarters for officers of the American army. The Elysee Palace was erected In 1718 for Count Louis d'Au vergne. It was used as a residence by the great Napoleon, by Napoleon III and by other noble Frenchmen, and until recently was the residence of the President of irince. What a change from the traditions of old France! And what a change for many of the sons of democratic America! Those officers are sons of blacksmiths, preachers, millionaires, washerwomen, college pro fessors and the good rank and file that compose American civilization. And they are living together in the palace of a for mer emperor while they pursue the splen did quest for world freedom and democ racy. Milwaukee Journal, IS THIS THE "DARKEST HOUR?" THEN SHOW OUR BRIGHTEST LIGHT mimc ..mmmm , smmsso. v" e, r c'. f T- smrsmmfflm. WHEN PEOPLE SMILE AND OTHER MEDITATIONS By Logan Pcarsall Smith Smiles WHEN pcoplo smile to thcniscUcs In the street, when I see n happy nnd self-absoibed smile suddenly light up the faco (not exactly made, It would seem, for smiling) of an ugly young man or middle aged nnd uninteresting woman, I often wonder of what Inner vision and foot lights, what dramatic scene of satisfied desire or malice or triumphant vanity this complacent smile Is tho faint reflection. The Bubble OOMETIMES, walking home at night, u on led about money or with tho war and the national debt ciushlng down on my shoulders, for a change and solace 1 allow my egotism n little nirlng. Taking out tho cork fiom tho Jar In which I usually keep my vanity bottled, that friendly Jinn rushes out and swells up llku n cloud and fills the sky. I walk lightly on In another world, a world that might be. a woild that should be, If I had Justice done me a world In which I cut a much more creditable figure. I shall not describe this Ideal, equ!slto universe; even for mo 'tis but the bubble of a moment, and I soon snuff It nut or of Itself It bursts and vanishes In thin nlr. The Latchkey T WAS astonished, I was almost horror-J- struck by the sight of tho new moon at the end of the stiect. In bewilderment nnd Blakelike wonder I stood on my door step gazing at It. For what was I doing there? I, a wanderer, a pilgrim, a nomad of tho desert, with no homo save where evening found me what was my ignoble business on that doorstep; at what perfidy had the moon caught mo with n furtive latchkey In my 'hand? Shrinkage SOMETIMES my soul floats out beyond the constellations: then nil thn -nct n of the unlverso Is mine. Then again It evaporates-, It shrinks, It dwindles, and of that flood of high thought, which over brimmed tho great bowl of space, there Is hardly enough left to fill a teaspoon. Misapprehension TJEOPLE often seem to take mo for some one else; they talk to mo as If I wero a person of serious, settled views. "What Is your opinion of democracy?" they nsk. "Are you in favor of the Channel Tunnel?" "Do you believe In Existence after Death?" I assume a thoughtful attitude, and by means of grave looks and evasive answers I conceal or at least I hope I conceal my discreditable secret. ' A Call I WONDERED why I was sitting in that overfurnlshed drawing room smiling and moving my hands. We talked of Shelley and French literature and the Fujure Life, nnd I made the remarks that I have made a hundred times before on those subjects. Then putting on my overcoat nnd hat, and taking my umbrella, I went ot into the street, and under the solemn and pas sionate skies of the winter sunset I walked briskly home, thinking of dinner. Faces f ALMOST always the streets are full of Xxdlsmal and dreary.looklng people; sometimes for weeks on end the poor face hunter returns unbleat from hU expedi i Hf&W$S$$$SA , .no' . ' f, a."-4' tions, with no piovlslon to replenish his day-di cam laider. Then ono dav tho plenty Is too great; there nro princesses at tho street crossings, queens lit the ta.slcabs nnd tho gods themselves can be seen openly promenading up nnd down the sidewalks. Card Paiare T WAS n follower pf Epicurus this morn--- ing In my butli, a Materialist at break fast; but an idealist afterward, ns I smoked my first cigarette and turned the unlvetso to transcendental vapor. But when I took up and began to read the Times, I had no longer any doubt about tho existence of the extcinal world. So as I worked or lend or walked the streets, this ldlo building up and knocking down of metaphysical caid palaces went on inside mo till, by the time tho enormous day was over, I had vaguely believed. I think. In almost all tho moro widely known c.. planatlons of existence. Now that tho City Controller has held up Or ore , . ..... i".j "i ouiivriu- tendent Robinson nnd other members of the Pollco Bureau whoso nbenco teems to l.o necessary to tho public good. It may l.o re nicnibeicd that it Is only-politicians who sometimes aio paid -fur doing nothing Canny Andy Every now nnd again we have occasion to iccall what a very canny Scot was An drew Carnegie. "Charley" Schwab, chosen to dig the shipbuilding tchemo out of the morass Into which it has been plunged hv a succession o U-mcanlng nilsmnn-Hm-ald. "0 ' ll13 ' "-" I-ouliviHe rirt Impressions of an Aviator The following description of his first ex peilencc In the nlr was written by a llaer. rUdd"tUde"t '" th C'Urte 0t a leltCr t0 !l .. , ?rfl rlll lim,t eiwcla!ly fun, becauso tho wind In jour face Is terrible; your hel met pulls under your thin like a train of horses; jour clothes are so stiff you can't moo around much, and when you start to land your stomach hits the top of your head But it's funny how soon ono gets used to lljing nnd thinks nothing of going up Of course, the machines wo hae are absolutely proof, nnd as long ns the motor runs ate easier to run than a Ford. After you get used to the Idea, you can make spirals nnd all kinds of things which aro lots of fun." lteply to Mrs. Yale To the r.Mlor of the livening Ptiblfo Ledger Sir I read the poem by Elslo Duncan Yale, suggesting what father can do to econo mize. Alas, poor father Is already doing all these things and then some. Permit me to reply to Miss or Mrs. Yale as follows, to wit: Dear lady, Miss or Mrs. Yale, Your ej-cs hae not been busy Or, praise tho gods, whene'er wo meet Your winsome glances miss me. All jour suggestions come too late; I say without misgiving I'm flKhtlng now the Beienth round With Lord High Cost of Living. My socks are worn nnd full of holes My B. V. D.'s past mending; I cannot count mV shoes' half-soles, Their list would be unending, I wear three patches on my breeks, My wardrobe's rather flighty; I fear a Are most because I haven't any nighty. Don't preach to me of saving pence , Or nickels, dimes and dollars; I've squeezed each bill J've seen so tight The very eagle hollers. r.K.1 - , u?AVD CODBN MURRAY. Philadelphia, April 29. "mzfflm&smmm Ten Liltle Bolsheviks rpEN little Bolsheviks, Feeling very fine Ono got In Trotsky's way, Then there were nine. Nine little Bolsheviks, Singing lij-mns of hate Ono becamo "bourgeois," Then thero were eight. Eight Httlo Bolsheviks . Establishing a heaven Ono met tho White Guards, Then thero weie seven. Seven little Bolsheviks, Up tn cunning tricks Ono went to Helsingfors, Then thete weio six. Six llttlo Bolsheviks Keen to keep nl.lv e, But one annoyed a Soviet, Then thero were five. Five llttlo Bolsheviks, Out to end the war; One wrote to Hlndenburj Then thero wero four. Four little Bolsheviks, Friends of llbertj- One went to a fortress. Then there Vcro three. Three llttlo Bolsheviks, Feeling lather blue; Ono Joined the Czarevitch, Then there were two. Two llttlo Bolsheviks, Welcoming tho Hun Ono tried to "fraternize," Then thero was one. One little Bolshevik. Didn't have to die Ho went homo to Hertllng, A happy German spy SOCRATES. Heaven Failed and II to Pay Berlin states that "bad weather" halted the drive to Paris. So It was Gott's depart ment that fell down, and he must have hearo a few things' fiom WUhelm by now. Mil waukee Sentinel What Do You Know? J QUIZ lmt In u dll.f? VUin Is Count Szcrenl? Who 1 1 I'rlnrnH Juliana? Nunie the author of "The llellt"? VUilfh la the (ireen Mountain Mate? What I" "'1 nilomf Wluit are Knclund'a ereat naval baeT Mho In Admiral Tjrwhllte? , Wluit I meant by "alrnllld." ' P'"' ".lion"? VWio nn ArrV? A. .. ..- ,. "Vclrilv a OuiZ hutleei a lllmlii wlilow who rremjlM herH 1 or U cremated nil the funeral lore tl 1 !:".;!!-i,i,:..r,,i skt. 3 TlJVhunnel porta. "'. ,"1la,J .ft" llniilogne, on the Unsllah ,;","'' -"".I whlrh HliidenuurE l irrlnr lila ne ' fennlir. . .,- Of.rar Wilde wrote "The llullnd of Hea(U (luol." Toculn! nn alarm nr warnlnc hell. llremeni capital of !he republic of ""SfJ one o! Hie MMrs of llio '''"!?",&' Hltifitcd on iMit'i banks of ' Wefl'-hUB iiiilra outlie of Hiiii'bunr. iimI : lJ ?fi it la the ihlcf jnereuntlte emporium of u many. . Illsi' Oermam the llternry and polite lniu of Germany. . Hector! the hraiest nnd "'"''".vl hltf l-rlam, Kln of Troy. He. IJf.'li, champion of the Trojans araluil " Greeks. . ,1. Uulf atreami the warm ocean current 01 v North Atlantic Ocean, . . Mollerel aaaumed mime of YTTnt',inu'xi, author of ''Tartuirf," "I. 'Vvnre '! Auaien viiamnenaini aon 01 jow-ii ;,, -. ? lain, a llrlll.li atateainan. ' '"'uX J pointed sa.eiie of the inemuera of ! 'K, UU IVaa Labi-
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers