Vietntsvlbanis6 eitstb
•
itr=El
Brief Pon, Schweifiebrenner.
SOHLIFFLETOWN, dci' lOta
METER FODDER ABRAHAM DRUCKER
—Deer Sur : De letsht woeh hut de Bevvy
so an English shtickly in eier Tseitung
geleasa, un se hut niers of deitch ous
gelegt, das der a breef kriekt bend fum
Ludwig Dengelshtock, on midi direct, no
das der elm de Wadi drucka wellet, no
well ich elm gor net bekanut bin duts
mich doch yets wunnera N'as for a ding
das er is—eb er an Seimoyer's moon is,
oder eb er for der Grant geht, we ich un
de Bevvy. Un well der ferleicht net
platz genunk bend in eier Tseitung for
uns all tsu accommodata de woch, will
ich wins kortz macha des mohl.
Forgeshter is der Jake Ifulderbach
wielder tsu UUS kUUMUL, under besht
Grant mom' is er yetz in Bons
Schliflte
town. Ich un de Bevvy under Jake hen
alles fun dent politick weasa ivver
g 'shwetzt, un sin tsu der conclusion kum
ma der John Winkeleisa aw noch rivver
kreeya. Unser plawn is ehn eilawda mit
uns in de kierrich tsu geh om negshta
Sundog, un donn ter under .Jake un em
Jake si fraw bei uns tsu middog essa, un
Bonn, warm tiler om essa sill wella mer
awfonga shwetza fun' Seimoyer un fum
Grant, un donn sog ich elan aw alles fun
weaya we de demokrata mer my watch
g'shtola hen dort in .Nei Yorrick we ich
of der convention war ; donn soil de Bev
vy amohl hinnich ehn, un donn ferluss
dish druf, se fetcht elm aw.
Mer hen aw yetz ous gemacht das nor: h
dem das der Grant amohl geleekt is du
ich rouse kumma for Posht Meahter tint
Schliftletown, under Jake behawpt ich
kann's emtly aw kreeya, un now kumm
ich aw rouse derfore. Awernet das mers
geht we em alta Seimoyer—rouse kum
ma for drous bleiva, aver rouse ktunm
tin ins omt nei tsu geh—sell is my shtyle.
Anyhow, ich huff tier signed aw my pit
tisheu, for ich kanns Emtly so goot be
deena des der besht demokrat im shted
dle, un warm ich de nawma of de breefa
net leasa kann dorm muss evva de Bev
y), draw, for se konnsgeh so goot das en
nicher onuerer morn.
Om Dinshdog duna mer unser beshts
doh. De demokratish majority kenna
mer anyhow runner bringa ut achtsea, un
warm mer der John Winkeleisa aw noch
rivver krceya, we ich inshpect das mer
duhn, done duna mer als uocli besser.
Awer, for sellam Ludwig Dingelshtock
platz macha sog ich, no more at present.
PIT SCIIIVWFFLEBRENNEIt.
Ludwig Dengelslitook on der
Pit Sehivefttebrenner.
SE MOTE TEDDL Yorrick (0.,
Uckdover der drei un lsvt
1808. )
LEEVER PIT seh du shreibsht
oily woch so a breefly in der }'ODDER
ABRAHAM fun weaya politics un deiuer
fraw, de Bevvy, un aw fun weaya we de
demokrata der dei watch g'shtola hen uf
der Nei Yorricker kunvention. Seller
breef weaya sellam kupperkup we er der
demokratish Selmoyers flatform ousgelegt
hut, un we de United States Benner
betzahlt wteara setta mit green bags, war
yusht abOut first rate, ton der weg we tin's
ehm unner de ribba g'shussa husht fun
'weaya we du ehm selly note betzahla
wetsht according tsum demokratish flat
form wars besht ding des ich for a longy
tseit geleasa bah, un lacha .hab ich missa
derweaya das ich bauch-wea krickt hab,
un donn awer is mers lacha fergonga.
Un we ich es der Sus geleasa hab—
se, war noch pet feertieh nacht essa
--un hut em Jake Suppaleffie, yusht cof
fay eishenka wella, un awer se hut sb
orriek lachaa missa das ehrit tie coffay
kon mit somt eon coffay ous der frond
g'falla is un all ivvers weirs dish-duch fer
shitt his der hens coffay drivver nunner
groluffa is un im Take si shu ni un hut
etuu de bout turn knechel gebreed. Hail
0 11 4U:kbY was is awer der Jake uf get
sbranptt Awer, genunk fun sellarn for
sleamobl.
De $ lll hut g's*w.t, ich set Bich frogs eb
du denksht doh hivva in Yorrick county
lists" keh so gouty shtorys das we drivva
wu du woonsht In Sclaßetown, ua le wit
orrjg on mer doe 4ep dick sloxeib un
der Nog fun ehner dob bi ins. Well, doh
war Oct- Morily hut
al-fort. Ili , demohriaiNll (14.1;0 geVirt.O. UP
idi ur, , N- 4 di`liCh hut thN,
ebbas lets is mit uuser pariy an alas un
sor kwrls ninny chrlich sin. Awt-r we
g'funna hen das der alt Monty so a
wacklich warm is, hen se conclude
elan a [ljssel ebbas tsu shlecka gcvva.
Donn hen de Court House ratta so unner
nouner gemacht das er a paar mold of cle
, Jury kumma is. A wer sell hut elm net
g . satistied, for es war dill , net Mils oat,
awer so we er meer meh das amohl
g'sawt hut, or is gonga for brincible, tin
warm Cr shun awram is, se solla ken norr
fun ehm macha. Well, dorm is der rode
Bill Enkeidel amohl on elm un hut
broweert elm tsu forgelshtera fun weaya
de neayer----elm glawa macha das warm
der Grant ni kumrnt dorm deata se all
unnich de weise nei heira, un unfouga
tsu vota. " sogt der Ifordy,
"warn se dos betzahla, int missa fechta
fors loud, setta se aw vota, provided se
vota ehrlich un yeader yusht eh mold,
un net drei tut feer mohi we selly demo
kratishe Eirishe es macha mit ohm falsity
bobbeera dort in Fildelfy, un warns ors
heira geht," secht der Moray, "bin ich
derfore das yeadas geht according tsu
seim obhadit. De fact is, de helft fun der
neager doh in Seituoyershteddle, sin of
der dentocratish side un in der freindshaft
mit de leading demokrata. Elms fun de
demokratishe weise trued hut a neager
g'heiertom ich hab ken doubt das es
eltra net Boot g'shmackt hut we se elm
g'numma hut, for sunsht het se's net
gedu. Anyhow," secht der Mordy, ich
vote for der Grant, un doh wogs now geh
we's will.
Du hetsht.awer doh si sella 0111 inorya
noch der leckshun, for de kronky kupper
kep tsu sehna. Se hen geguckt das warn
a yeadas fun dim ready g'west wrer sick
tsu ferkaufa for an ous gekowtcr claw
duwock, un so sin aw alleweil noli net
drivver.
Now hearts aw das se wella de Sei
moyer un Blair foot. ous shpanna. Awer
suppose se duna sell, was d'no ? lie fact
is, Pit, de soup was se in Nei Yorrick
gekocht fien sellamohl we se der di watch
g'shtola hen, ruissa se aw yctz fressa, tur
de dernokratish party is ous g'shpielt
un so dote das de Sowderoncornfederasei.
(Warn du sell wart net fershtaysht donn
loss de Bevy draw un ders explaina.)
LITD IV IC; DE NG LESII TOC
P. Airann du migleeti kanusht,donn
of de. PreF...ideAtut leekt-hun, MI du
di vote ui.
Votes bons dicket
Vote uft.
Vote de goes
Vote free moryats.
Vote owats.
Vote a pair mold tswisha ni.
Vote we (le demokrnta vota in Kodorus
--bis mer genunk hen L. I).
Fan Lodmerhshteddle.
LOD W. 1.: It 1 li TE131)1.1 . :, Oil. 24 7 JSIN
FODDER ..Akaunn M :--Mer lien horty
tseita doh alleweil, abborbich sidder der
leckshun, for ich bin elms fun de un
glickliche demokrata was de gripes so
orrig hen alleweil. Es gookt yetz aw
das wann unswer party om tsomma falla
wter. Icli cleat net yusht so feel drum
geva, un awer de Kotarina, my alty, for
se is aw uf der Republican side, lacht
mich als so orrig ous, un behawpt das es
besht ding das ich do kent wter mich aw
river uf de Republican side shot& uu for
der Grant tsu vota. De Katarina war
shun a Republican we ich se g'hiert hab,
un se behaupt der moult lcabt net wu se
draya kann..
Now, wanes net wter das de deniokrata
mer so an emtly fershprocha hetta doun
het ich selwers republican dicket gevote,
under weg we's yetz gookt henna Sc
viers doch net gcvva, weil ehna alles fer
lorra geht, un now hab ich a notion der
Katarina ehta rote nemma un grawd roes
kumma Tor der Grant, nu watin ich du
dorm kumnut aw noel feel mehner.
Awer du musht now nix sauga derfti,
sunsht duna se mich aw a torn-coat heasa.
leh hab im sinn es tsu do so a wennich uf
'em slily
NICUOLAS BAUCIITSUVER.
_ .boy who followed the tow
path as a profession, once visited a pious
uncle in the city. At • dinner,' without
waiting for ceremony, he attacked the
nearest dish. Thereupon the unde in, a
deprecatory tone' 'said : ' John, we're ' In
the habit of saying
,something before we
eat." And John, talking with his mouth
full, an,d-haviug i n mind the. usual jokes
they have on the canal boat, replied :
" Go aheadl you can't turn my'stomach:"
—"Henrietta," said a lady to. her new
,crirl, " when there's bad news, particular
ly private afflictions, always let the
boarders know it before dinner. It may
seem strange to you, Henrietta, but such
things make a great diflbrence the
eating in the course of a year."
-A. Bridget applied to the family of : a
citizen up. town • yesterday, with her
clothes dripping like a water spout. On
being interrogated .as ,to her condition,
she said sue understood the lady pf the
house wanted a wet nurse, and she had
come ready for service.
H KR ABRAHAM.
NIA
A Dimotyeratie Protest.
Its ruined we are wid taxashm,
The likes ov it nivir wuz known;
The load that is piled upon us
Wttd squash out the heart ov a stone,
Yez may talk about fraydum and j u stice,
The price of the Union, an' that,
But the price that is axed for six Unities
Is too high libr a good Dinnnykrat.
What's the wurrth ov the Union whin whisky
Is taxed wid a shillin' a quart?
Can a Government be one of fraydom
Whin you've got to payout money for't
To he sure, fur ayquil taxayshin
Its a Dimmykrat's duty to bawl,
But meself thinks its mity unpropur
To be Dimmykrats taxite at all.
Is the Government wtm of our choosin' ?
Don't illekshun returns ausir No ?
Is Congress that piles on the taxes,
Any more than a Radikal show ?
Heil we got our fair share ov ploondher?
An' the whole is all that we ax—
Thin why shod a Rad&le Congress
Upon Dimmykrats levy a tax?
"It's the war," is the Radikle ansir,
"les the war that brought on the expins
That's a fact that i'll not be disputin',
But what Radikle dares make praytinse
That Dimmykrats wanted the fitin'
Fail, the Radikles all of 'em know
Whin the South packed their trunks to thravel,
We tould thim, "God bless yez, an go."
Did Vallandigbiun vote to buy powdher
To kill Dimmykrat binds in the South?
Did Pendleton spake for coetsion,
Or Saymour wid war fill his mouth ?
Did they shware that by traitors an' rebels
'['be Union shud nivir be shplit,
Though it tuk iviry man an' ayche dollar
To maintain It ?—Divil a bit !
Whin our Southern hinds got mad in airnist
An' blazed away at the flag,
Did the Dimmykrat chiefs sate their soords thin
Au' rush to defend the mild rag?
Did we dluop our picks an' our shovils
Au' run to inlisht, iviry man,
tin to the Union an' fraydum
At gloory ? Divil a man
Twos tithe an' marchin' we did Cho,'
But not ow the liadikle kind
While in front the souljers wnifitin'
We wuz . dohe our tnin behind.
As flu• inarellin'l Set a dlnalt wheel a turnin
An' we'd thravil away double quick,
When a Dimmykrat pathrlot wuz dhraftid
lle'd for Canady shtrait cut his shtick.
inst our Southern Dimmykrat braythrin'
'Twuz Radikle souljers that fought,
An they killed Southern Dimmykrat voters
Yid Radilde powdber an' shot.
'Twuz Radikles did most the lithe
An' fired the ntoney away,
But now they put taxes on whisky
An' the Dimnaykrats have it to pay.
That the wuns what did all the mischief
Should pay foet, is sartinly sine;
An' if there'd have bin no fitin'
There'd have.bin no *Jar expinse
So it's titir .111 be Aber thinkin'
. .
What a good Payce Digunykrat, axes,
That the souljera that did all the fide'
Themselves shed pay all the taxes.
Nigger . 0 .?Nr igger I Nigger !—A
6 ' 'Mite Boy in Blue" Cap
. tares Four Africans!.
We have before assured our readers
that the Democratic hatred of the uegroes
was only vented against the male sex.
The softer set of the• colored persuasion
exercise a most seductive influence ,over
our susceptible Democratic friends. Of
the million mulattoes down South, every
One. of theni can boast a Democratic
daddy. .A distinguished . Democratic
orator and politician - of this city can be
seen almost 'Witty prowling.through the
obscure, streets and lanes of our city on
the trail' of same colored sister. This is
ft well known-fact, as.every polite officer
of this city can testify. A few weeks
since a new horn colored infant was found
floating in the canal feeder near Titus
ville, tins county. The mother was arrest
ed and.she swore her misfortune on the
President of a Democratic Club in that
vicinity. One evening last week a negro
ball was held in Taylor Hall, attended by
the first colored families in this city.
Female Africa was there, with pouting
lips that opened upon gates of Ivory.—
Dusky 'CleoPatras, warranted_ all wool,
sailed gracefully through the dizzy waltz,
or languished lovingly upon the arms of
enamored swains. "White Boys in Blue '
COL. JAMES P. WICKERSHAM,
STATE SUPERINTENDENT OF COMMON SCHOOLS.
tittteb.
BY .DU:siNIS O'FLAIIEBTY
were among the spectators. Chief of
these was the President of that gallant
club. We must be Frank, and tell the
whole story. The heart of the Presi
dent of the White Boys in Blue" was
touched by the charms of these nigger
damsels. As a Democrat, he was bound
to hate all he niggers, but as a man the
colored sister had claims upon his chiv
alrous nature. *
Just as the City Hall clock was upon
the stroke of twelve, unsteady steps were
heard descending into the saloon of our
excellent friend, Captain Means, under
the post-office. Suddenly emerging into
the gasli;.,lht was seen the burly form of
the President of the " White Boys in
Blue," escorting four of the blackest
negro wenches that ever darkened a col
ored ball room! Up to the bar they
came, the " White Boy in Blue" forming
the centre, with two wenches for his kit
and right wings. It was a splendid sight
to the military eye !
"-riven?, worth len years 4)f peaceful life,
One glance of their a may !"
Keeping step to the music of the band
up stairs, they charged the bar. Our
colored troops fought bravely. Captain
Means brought his Bourbon battery to
bear, but the " White Boy in Blue," as
sisted by his colored shemale recruits
captured it at a single dash ! The con
tents of the battery was emptied into
tumblers—the White Boy in Blue "
touched glasses with the "Black Girls in
Wool," and the battle was over.
Then came the question of "reconstruc
tion" on the paying basis. Ile searched
every pocket, but could find but one bill.
That was a tailor bill of Jo Rice for an
unpaid suit of clothes ! Captain Means
kept no slate for dead beats. Here was
a dilemma for a brave " White Boy in
Blue" to be in! But great men are
equal to great emergencies. The President
of the club of "White Boys in Blue"
turned to the blackest of his escort, and
promptly solicited the loan of two dol
lars. The money was produced from the
pocket of her petticoat, and the whole
party returned to the ball room rejoicing.
Dear reader, this is no fancy sketch,
but an actual fact, as a dozen Democratic
spectators can testify if necessary. Let
the " White Boys in Blue" take courage.
—T r e i tte m , (N. J.) Sentinel.
" THE Press" says : The colored peo
ple of Washington have erected the first
mouument to Thaddeus Stevens in the
shape of a handsome school-house. No
tribute could have been more appropriate
nor more grateful to the venerable states
man, who always deemed his labors in
behalf of the common-school system of
Pennsylvania to be the crown of his fife.
A female teacher of Harrisburg threat
ens to whip any of her scholars who hur
rah for Grant and Colfax. The Lebanon
Courier says: "We'll go fifty cents
that she's a dipappointod •old maid, op
posed to 4 Innott, 7 and ugly at that."
t r - )
1 )1 '.
.1% A 14 r
.11
".4?
-- PEW WIII:.IPERING;.--.M.MV ELLEN
(ttit.ciottsi.A. "Betsy JanP, isn't
non coming ofr?"
BETSY JANE (petli.lhly)• '• No.
you move a little further? vf al are (Teas
.
my lace flounces."
RY E LEN ( inerilly a Wile). " 1 4A1%
you think Susan Brown looks dreadful
homely?"
BE'rsv .JANE. • • WaS there ev—. Ohl
there's Charlie ! Isn't lie a perfect
Adonis! How el() wish he would look
our way !"
MARY ELLEN coniling sweetly). A,lO
I see him. Ile's looking toward us."
BETSY JANE (angrily). "Ile isn't
looking at you, so you needn't act like a
fool. The minister's going to pray."
MARY ELLEN. " Thoso long prayers
of his are positively awful, and I sha'n't
try to keep awake."
BETSY JANE (peeping through her
,fin
gers at Charlie). "Go to sleep, dear, I
shu'n't disturb you."
THE disrespectful fellow who wrote the
following is daily expecting an attack of
broomsticks :
Duplex hoops and painted awes,
Patent calves and ti - reign curl,
Watertidla and costly lacos,
1741 too plainly what are girls.
—A. young woman, meeting a folnier
fellow-servant, was asked how she liked
her new place. " Very well." " Then
you have nothing to complain of?"
"Nothing, only master and mistress talk
such very bad grammar !"
—" Come here, sissy," said a young
gentleman to a little girl, to whose sister
he was paying his addresses; "you are
the sweetest thing on earth." " No, f
ain't," she replied. " Sister says you are
the sweetest.' The gentleman popped
the question the next day.
—A dandy wishing to be witty, accost
ed an old rag-man as follows :
" You take all sorts of rubbish in your
cart, don't yqu
" Yes—jump in, jump in'"
—REYNOLDS, the dramatist, observing
the thinness of the house at one of his
pieces, said : "I suppose it is owing to
the war." No, was the reply
owing to the peace."
—" So far so good," as the boy said
when he had finished the first pot of his
mother's jam.
—A traveler in Pennsylvania asked the
landlord if they had any cases of ,sun
stroke in that town. "No, sir," says the
landlord, if a man gets drunk here we
say he is drunk—and never call it by any
other name."
--Will asked old ten-per-cent," what
he wanted to accumulate so much money
for. Says he : "You can't take it with
you when you die, and if you could it
woidd
--A wag leaf a cleTyymau a hor;q3
Whieli ran away and threw him, and then
claimed credit for " aid in spreadin. , the
gospel."
—An exchange says clergymen address
congregations of ladies and gentlemen
as "brethren" because the brethren em
brace the ladies.
—A waggish editor says that the streets
of one of the Western cities are to be
lighted with red headed girls. That will
be bad—boo many people will be found
hugging the lamp posts.
—The latest case of Grecian lend
became fully developed in a recent feline
quarrel on our back shed.
—josh Billings says he has "seen some
awful bad throat diseases completely
cured in three days by simply jineing
temperance society."
—Little Daisy's mamma was tryinz• to
elain to her the meaning of a smile.
"Oh, yes! I know," said the child; "it
is the whisper of a laugh."
—"How is-coal now ?" inquired a g•en
tleman of a son of the Emerald Isle who
was dumping a load of coal in Fulton
street. " Black as ivver, sir, be jabbers,"
responded Patrick.
—A youth who desired to know how to
become rich sent a quarter in answer to
an advertisement, and received the fol
owing valuable receipt :
"Increase your receipts and decrease
your expenditures. Work eighteen hours
a day, live on hash and oat meal gruel."
—A coternporary, lauding a "well
known citizen"just elected to office,says,
"He is one of the cleverest fellows that
ever lifted a hat to a lady, or a hoot to a
blackguard."