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I at no advertisements will lie inserted in
the columns of Title Oak don Adtooitk that
lay be received from unknown parties or
I etuis unless accompanied by the fusil.
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it i each subsequent Insertion 2i cts.
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II. V. MourHiuicn.Jr., Publisher.
The Carbon Advocate
An Independent Family tTewnau
Published every KAT&BDAY, In
Lehighton, Carbon Oo.,ra-, by
KAIIIIY V. noBTHIISEli.
OWB-BASKWAT. a abert dCetswfa cVit
the LehlAh Valley X. B. Cog,
Tens: $1.00 perAmn it AiTcs
btut DCBcnrtrTioa o rua Am rajtT
Job Printing
AT VEHT LOW PsUW "
TI. V. Moktiiimer, Jr Publisher.
INDEPENDENT " Live and Let Live."
$1.00 a Yenr if Paid in Advance
VOL. X III., No 17.
LEHIGHTON, CARBON COUNTY, PA., SATURDAY, MARCH H, 1885.
If not pnid in advance, $1.25.
Attorneys & Counsellors.
ATTORNBY AND COD.NSKLLOU AT LAW,
DiJi3tsiit,t.inloatoj,ri.
teal kstate and Collection Acenev VflUEayand
fell Il.al Kitate. Oonvejanrina; .leatly done Col
tellona promptly mad. Settling fcntatee of I)
Ideate tpaelalty. May til eoneulted In Knllih
ndUeroiaa. Ncv.K.
r A. SNYDER,
ATTOKNEY AT LAW.
Urie-Comcr of Bunk Street & Ilankvra y
SnJ butldlna; above the Oarbon Advocate
Printing OlBco.
May m, i8!in6 r,r:uiaHTOM:
Physicians find Dentists.
jQB. W. W. KEHEIt
PHYSIC'IA ANIJ 8URQE0N,
BANK STREET, LEHMUTON.
orVlCtllourint Parryvlllo Prom a.m.,
te 12 tu, dally.
May bo eoniultod In the English or Oerman
Language. May IT. '84.
-y- A. DERHAMEK, M 1).,
NIYSICIAN AND 9UHGK0N
f pedal attention paid te Cbronle Pleeaeee.
Ofllee: South Katt corner Iron and '.lu.l at., I.o
hlc.hton,Pa. Aprils. 1876.
11. HEISEK, M. 0.
U. I. Examining Biirfieon,
rBAUTICIMO PHVBIOIAN and BUHOCON.
Oinclt: iJsukStroet, HKUBK'a ULOOK, Lenica
ton, re.
May beeonaalledln tUoOermm Lanscuofre.
Nov. 3
REMOVED.
W. G. M. Seiple, Physiciau & SnreGii,
Has ltemsved hli omen and lleildcneo from
Second St.to SOUTH Slroet.ln tho l.ull lliiir
formerly occupied by A. J IIou.kmmater,
where bo will he pleased to soo.hls friends
andpatr.ns. -OrPIUK IliillltS: rrom
6 te 9 o'clock P. H. March 31, 1SSJ.
T. A. Rabenold, D.D.S.,
IIRAKCU orriOE-OpiioilteOlausJJtUro's
Bank St., Lohighton, Pa.
TJanilstry tn all lit liraneriai. Tcalli tx
traetad without lain. (lai admlnlatoreil
whau riuilcd. nmee llaya V EUN tS
IJAY of e.oh week. I', tl. Address,
I.ITZENIIEKU, I.ehlgheouBty, I'a.
Jan.l, ll'a-ly.
W. A. Cortright, D.D.S.,
OFFICE : Opposite the "iiroadway House,"
Mauch Chunk, Pa.
ratlaats have tha benfflt of tlio Uteatlm.
proyaments in meiuannai apriiu: u.i
asat. AKyF.STUETIO admlnl.tereil It
4ailra t. If pesalkle, parsons residing outside
at Maaah Chunk, ikould m.iko engat;menla
by Mall. 1 Ti
A BOOK ON
Deafness & Catarrh.
Tba abnve named honk of near lr0 pasrs
by lilt. SHOEM AKEII, the nr ll-known ox
...iMail a ural Snriraun. will bo Hint tree
laany address. Evary fmlly should Imye
thla lloak. Tu, voox is iiiuiiraieu, aim iui
ly aiilalnsln plain laaicuage all
Diseases of the EAR aud CATARRH,
aad kew to treat time ailments iceesMfally
Addrm,
Dr. C, E. Shoomakor,
613 IValnul Street, HEADING, Pa.
Sea. e, isst.ly
-
QARBON HOUSE,
J. W. EAUDENHUSH, PflOPRlETOn,
IIaxkSt., LsmanTO!!, Pa.
Tke Oasbok llonsii offers flrst.elais aeenm.
madatlans to tLt Trarollni publle. tloardlnit
by the IWy er Weak on Keasoualile Terms.
halaa Clears, Wlnos and l.lnuors alnayeon
kaad. Head Shads ami Stables, with attao
lira llaatlars, altashed. April to-yl,
TDACKEUTOS HOTEL.
X
laway batwaaa Miuoh Chunk k X,thls;hton
LEOPOLD MEYER, PaorMTO,
Packarten, rann'a.
Tkli wall kanwn hotel Is admirably refitted,
aid has tba beitseeoimnndations lor oerman
eat aad transient hoarder.. Excellent table)
and tke very bsit llquori. Also tine (tables
allaskad. Sept. H-yl.
"Maucli Chunk House,
Sasa.aehanna Street, Mauch Chunk, Tenna.,
T. F. FEU It, I'ronrlctor.
TTkea rllltlnir at tho County Seat this
lintel rrlll found to he tint-clan In avory re.,
neat. Wine.. Liquors, I. alter llaer. Clear.
aaS etker HelreiUmenta of purest quality at
the Har Term, very moderate. Patronage
elleltec tie, it. M. mi
Beer Saloon and Restanrant
1113 Vln St., rWUdelphia.
Donnia Gilbert, Proprietor.
Tke Far Is faarlsked with choice Cigars,
rreak Laaer, aad other rafreshinenta. Per.
sans from the Lehigh Valley Tleitlnn I'htla
alalpkla are raineellully Invited to Rive me a
eall. IitNxte Uilucrt.
Marak is. 113-1 tf.
11AUDENBUSH
K-Mfwtfally anoouno to tha public that b
hu uninoiift NKW LIVEllY STA HLK tn
tttioQ with hi houl, una Is jTopired to
rirnun itun igr
Faasrals VfBtliiflp or Mm Trips
aa aharleat notleaand raest lluoraHerms. All
orders left at tho ''Oarl.u Ileum" will rreelre
proatpi attention. Stable on North t-'reet
eat the hotel, Lehighton. au-Tl
ATlTiTflD Sendjoents for potaRe,ndrf
VHl AH. celvo Iree.aeustly Nix nt o.l
D. I XllUUiajhich all! help yon to more
ssoaay right away than auylhlnR else In I till i
world. All.of either sex. socace I Irom first
aeur. Tb broad way to fortuae opens b. I
fh.a the workers. ablulely sure. Atoaee
v&tres Tatrt k Uo., AsgusU, Me.
Pea. Mtr
""CLINTON nRETNETf.tsahlonabU
Uur,T tna .suos ntsu. nana an,
J. w.
Thomas' Drug Store.
GREAT
Just received a large
stock of the very latest
paterns of
Wall Papers
AND
Borders,
which I offer at the fol
lowing reduced prices:
Gilts, 25 & 3Qc.
White Blanks,10& 12c.
Brown B's 7, 8 & 10c.
All must be sold in a
few months. Call at
DRUG STORE for
bargains.
Durlings' Old Stand, Eank
Street, LEHIGHTON.
T. J. BRETNEY,
Keepeelfully announrei to the merchants of
L.elilKli'on nnl others that he Is prepared to
do all kinds ol
Hauling of Freight, Express
Matter and Baggage
at rerv reasonable prices. My prompt at
tention to all orders be hopes In merit a iliare
ol public patrnnaco. Ilesldeneo. corner of
Pine and Iron Street, LelilKhten, Pa.
Orders lor hanllnir left at (1. M. sweeny fe
Son's Storo will receive prompt attention.
T. J. BP.ETNEY.
Oct. 11, lWIJm.
X. CONVEVANCEIl,
AND
GKNEEAL INSURANCE AGENT
Tbe folio Ina Companies are Represented:
LRU AN )N MB rUAI, riBH.
nSADINO MUTUAL 1111 E,
Wyoming vir.i:.
roTTsviLi.E nure,
LCHIOIl nnK.nnrttke
TRAVELERS ACOIIII-NT INtr'UR ANUE
Alan 1'ennsjlvjnli and Mutual Home Thlct
eteetlreanil In.aranic (,'cmnauv.
Uarch21.1S;3 T1103. KEMERER.
TT TIT nf..r
N II I .KitnitHse. an.i we will mail vt.n Iree,
liULlL a rrial, nlnnble samilo box of
goods that will put you in the way or i-inlc
Ins; moro money in n fiw day than you ivci
thnuuhr. i o-aibl? at nnv tui.lnrif. t'unlta
notrtnn'reil. You can live at homo and
work In snare time only, or all the lime All
( both sours, orall aires, irrandly sneeesslul,
it) ennls to (5.C0 easily earned every evrnliiK
I hat nit who want work may test thebusl.
n.t. w mnWn this uni.artilleleil oiler: lonll
who are n ,t vrcll satisfleil we will send tl
to iay for the lioublo i t writ!' K us. Pull
panleulars, directions, etc , rent free. Im
mense pav ab.nlutalr sura for all who stmt
atoaee. Don't deljy. Address S'msos u.
Co. p.irtlan 1, Maine.
(ieo.SO-Jy
Dr. C. T. Horn,
Central Drug Store,
Opposite the " Carbon Home,"
Bank Strcot, Lehighton, Pa.,
Keeps a full seppiy ef
Pure Drugs & Medicines,
Fancy and Toilet Articles,
Stationery & Choice Cigars.
Choice Wines and Liquors for Medicinal
purKwrs. Prcrriptions very carefully com
pouuded, day or night.
ALSO, Just received, an Immense stock el
Ncneit and most Popular Designs In
Wall Papers
AND
Borders,
whleh he Is oHerlng at Pi Ices fully as low as
the same qualities and Patterns can bo got
In the Cities. If )ou are about redecorating
your hone, call and see styles and learn the
prices before pnrchaslng elsewhere.
Ren.ember.lUE CENTRAL DltUO Store,
Peb.x.yl Dn.O. T. IIOUN.
dnpresen's Riven away, Cent
us live cents port n it e, and by
lUUUmati ,ou will eet frien tmrkniio
of t'onds of larjo value, that lll start)en
In work that will at once l.rlrjg jouln money
faster than anyihlnn else In America Ail
about the n).uuo In prcsnnls with eachbix.
ARents wantud everj'Hhere.of either sex, nf
all ages, for all the lime, cr spare time only,
tn w. rk fur us ai their own homes. Fortunes
for all workers absolutely assured. Don't
delay. II. IU'.leit & Co., Portland, Me.
DeoHMy
"Suhscribe for tho Ad
vocate, only $1 per year.
lWstUau:b6yrun. Taataacood. I
Uao In luaa. bv dnutclata.
Hires Cmts-M, Cold", ITonifsf net. CVmip, Mtlirori,
Uiojichltl, Wlioopdur Coiiph, Jntii'lcr.tCuiifctinip-
tion, riki iviicain con ufiiijuto
mi son! In Bihnnrril itaffc of
I ho dlTfua, li If e 3 rti. CVtu
Hon, 'iho Gcm.lno Vt Full's
Cmtnh Siitm li nolil orlr In
Conp fc';n'P lJ roM orlj la
uhtit vriiPjifM, fltnl bcflig our
r(F''trcl T!n.u-!!nrki to viti
VjSKi A Hull'MlUa.l in a vtixlt,alted
fioilmtloi.Jffmtuptjsof Jt.hn K,
JtttU t A, V. teiier ifr Co., 80I0
Prop'a, Calttmoi-o, MO., U. B. A.
Ul.'Ji-'i-'l
Thew Lnnce'a I'lnsa Tho treat Tobnrro All'
THE CITY Of LOVEBS TRUE.
ST J 11. 8RAOAX.
A freth wind blew at the close of day;
Lrnr lances of light on the landscape lay;
Tho red sun strode from tho flaming sky
Llko a wrathful monarch, with roles awry,
And the cloudy lords of his retlnuo
Bowed to the earth ss he wjthutow.
Now dear little ilsmiel, what do you see,
That steals your bewilchinr eyes from met"
A city I see, most strange and fair,
That hung, in the vault ol Iho sunset air;
Chariots glitter along its slrrct,
And la lies fair rido far and ileet.
A cddcndiist from the travel blows,
Where a silver rippled river Uowj,
,V ml ships, goudolss, shallops and sloops, .
Like the pictures vu mother's wedding cups.
Sail out of ill port and drop from suht;
I think Ihey are bound for the Isles of
NiHlil.'"
Ilnw glad I am ynu are wingless, dear;
I would pine to a shade If you left me here.
Dut I, Ion, know of a city fair,
It is yet it is not anywhere,
It is .-ailed thx'City of Lovers True,'
And how I do wish I was there now with
you I"
There's a magical word would transport
ui itralghtwny,
11 only that word some kind msiden would
say.
And what Is it? Shy liltta lorcereai, guest;
You cannot, now truly t Well, then, it is
'yes.'
0, speak it for me, lovel Ah! now wc are
there.
In the clly tliet is, yet is not anywhere.'
Prom fJoDKT'i Ladt'b Book.
ONLY TWENTY MINUTES
A Washington Narrative) cf Actual Eyent
In Ihe winter of 1683-84. there fell
linnl frost In tbe Inltltude of WaahiiiK
ton, and a glitleriue sluetof ico spanned
tbe Potomac from nliore to abate. Sucl
an event is of somewhat rare occurrence
Iu a climate bo distinctively southern in
Us general ch'arncleristica, and tbe youth
of the city made tbe tnont of it.
So long ns tbo sport listed tbe glisten
inc Btirlnce of tke Btrcntu reflected the
graceful movements of n throng of akat
ers. not the lenKtnpry and agile of whom
was tbe imrr.itor of thin story. Bnrn in
the inhospitable North, where nil tbe
winter Iour Hie rivers are Ice-locked and
Ihj rot di piled l.iwli with drifted snow
this spectacle rekindled in me tonitlliiug
of tho entbti,astn wilb which, na a atrip
liug, I had always entered into the win
ter pnslimta of Bk.itiug nnd cnasting.nnd
I bciutily welcome! thla opportunity to
display my nccomplist menu. The easo
with which I described tbe figure 8, nnd
cnt my initials on the glossy plain, w. s
thd ndmlrntion of everr young lad l:i
that merry compauy, and prnlified my
si'lf lovo to a degree that, considering
how Inug R titn i) had elapsed uinco I bad
indulged iu such boyish pleasure, was
really RUrprUing.
Fortunately, the frost held for sevsrU
days, oud every afttruooti tbe whit'
bosom of the l'otomno waa the acno ol
it gathering that embryo d much of tb
fn-bttiii aud beauty of tbe Capital, nnd
occupying, ns I did, tbe post of arslstaut
physician In a government institution
near by, with more leisure at my com
ttianil than I Always know what to d
with, I was frequently able to purticipat
in these gjj'lifs. Unusually I had fo
toy companUm a young eltctriciau, who
was an accomplUbed skater aud devotee
of the sport. One name is as good as
nuotber I culled him ''Tom."
"Well, Tom and I had many an txcil
iug race up and down the river during
ihat memorable ice caruival, until, en
the lust night, ooourred tho hazardous
adventure which I am about to relato,
Auil in order that von may arrive at a
proper understanding, of It, I must pause
in my narrative long enough to give you
tn idea of tbe locality.
If you have ever, Irom tbe terrace of
the Cupitol, looked dona on tbe Botan
ical GardeiiK aud across the unkempt
Government reservation to tbe flats
wboro the dredgers are so busily at work
you must buve noticed that the Foto
nuc, utter flowing lazily tinder the "Long
Bridge," across which rumbles tbe train
fur Alexaudria, seems lo btrtlch out au
arm to the eastward, and then, turulug
suddenly about tales its wuy southward
towards tbo Chesapeake. This arm,
which is called the "Eastern branch
the Pntomao," really tue outlet oi au-
aooslla Cfeek, aud the creek, taking i s
rueiiillie M iryland bllN, udt far from
iue,- uisiqrio uuueuauurg uueinug
ground, peaudera along between green
meauowa tumi It reacuts tue ou navy
yarn, ami lorius me aouiuern uwunuary
,i, iu. n.j.
the Potomao, a point of laud proieots
Horn thovbore line and foim ilei-ite of
tie Agonal, garrisoned at the tim of
bleb I ante by a ccmDany or two of
artillery, vim hamsouie bouse
aseieni areoiteoioio tor me ometrs,
F3 I
sung quarters for tho men. Upon tbe
opposite side of the stretim, crowning a
tioblo height, standi tbe institution with
which I am connected, IIh ivy-mantled
towers realizing tbe popular Idea or an
old English castte. At tbe foot of tbo
hill, which, is circled by a substantial
wall, a wharf prnjsols into tbe water und
a winding rond leads to it from tbe sum
mit. It is perhaps a mite from the
wharf to the arsenal opposite and nuotb
er nitla to tbs city front proper, and it
was by this route that! usually made
my daily trips to ton a.
It wai on tbe last night of the cam!'
val, aa I have said, that tbe adventure
in qiit.ition befell .me. The weather had
becomo perceptibly milder nnd the glar
ing sunsbiuo bad materially cofteued tbe
Ice, so that it was necessary to exetcite
soma caution in crossing the white ex
panse I bad diued that day with my
friend Tom, at tbe Arlington, and, ns we
knew that tbe ice could not last much
longer, it bad been agreed between ns
tbitt be should go over and spend ILe
evening with me, and that night niter
mooutise wo should shale back together.
It nss already dusk, nnd tbo stars
shone but dimly through the baze, that
seemed to be gathering like n veil be-
weeu heaven and eatth. When we
rencbed tbe river side, therefore, I light-
d a small bull's-eye lauleru which 1 bad
taken tbe precaution to briug along
with me, and by Its frieudly ylenra we
clamped on our silver-plated skiitea.
A moment spent in rummaging through
our pockets for nuotber match with
which lo light our cigars and we were
ni
Clipl clipl clip! with long, easy
strokes nith that delicious swaying
motion which gives wings to the pace
with light hearts aud occasionally a mer
ry tthiHlle, piercing tbo flilluess of the
evening air, wu bent to tbo work!
Wo bad left tbo Washington monu
ment a towering spectre, faintly out
lined In the darkness far lo shoreward;
hnd ahnt like an nrrnw under the dingy
trackway ut the Long Bridge, and bad
list sighted the rtflectton of the arsenal
light, streaming full upon our coursr,
when crack! boom! a succession of un
earthly sounds tbs meaning of which we
both well knew, fell upon ears and
startled us from our fancied fsrourily.
"Look out," I shouted to Tom.
"Oh, It's nolbiug,'1 he replied cheerily.
But tbe very next moment Ibe ice
groaned again, bent, cracked and sank
uuder us we were in tbe waterl
As the icy flood closed over my head,
a shiver r.tu through mo. It was indeed
the Itiver of Death! But, instantly, there
cimo a revnlsiou of feeliug, with that
swiftness of thought which is ctnracter
islic of tbe mind in times of supreme
danger. I reflected that I was a strong
Hwimmer, that tho edgo of the ico could
not be far off, and that even if I did not
succeed in reacbiug it, Tom would
doublltsi come to my rescue, ro that by
tho time I hnd risen again to tbn surface
I had formed n dc&uite resolution. Strik
ing out boldly, I soou reached tbe ice
field, aud, exerting my wholo strength.
eudeavnrcd to mount upon it. But the
treacherous cakes broke off again aud
again In my frantic grasp and then sank
beuonlb me! At last I found one that
seemed sufUcienlly strong to bear my
weight, but by tbts lime my bauds bad
become benr.mbed and bruised by tbe
rongh edges of the floe, and I felt my
Rtrengtb leaving me. By n supreme ef
fort, however, I succeeded In drawing
myself partly out of tha water, so that
uiy breast rested upon tbo extremity of
tbn cuke, nnd using the leverage thus af.
forded, I erndunlly got my body oyer en
tirely, I now felt secure, but was power
less to move or cry for help.
When my strength bad sufficiently rc
vived.I cautiously rose to my fret nnd
shouted at the top of my voice lor Tom,
Breathlessly I waited for au answer! It
came preutly in a hoarse cry, far away
dowu tbe stream.
"I'm nil right; how are yon?"
I replied to this welcome bail by di
recting Tom to work bis way along care
fully until be rencbed tbe place where I
then stood, It was a slow nnd painful
proof ss, but at at last be was within
hand-reacb.
"If you can hold on a bit longer, I
can give you n leg," said I, as I groped
about iu tba dark for a convenient crack
into which I could thrust my fingers and
secure a tight grip. Having fouud one,
I lay down flat ou my stomach, with my
legs banging over edge of tbe ice, and as
Tom c-tugbtbold of those useful preheu
siles, I drew him nut of bis predicament.
For an instant we flittered ourselves that
we were safe, but hardly bad the first
words of congratulation passed our lips
ere down again down into that dark and
chilly stream we sank together.
How loug we floundered about tbtra
I cannot tell. We called anxiously to
each otber; we shouted, we yelled like
maniacs, but no help came. On tbe ar
unl point we eonld seo lights moving
but they cams no nearer. Across the
river tbe windows of the Institution
aeemctl to us to be fairly blazing uilh
light. Over there, I knew, were friend
ly hands and strong arms in plenty but
uone were reached out to us.
Good God! were we then to bs left to
perish in the midst of that grinding ice;
in tbe awful solitude ot the starless
uight? Were wo to fee! our grasps relax
of ing our Augers slipping tho water ria
i0g, rising to our shoulders, our necks
I clo.iug, closing alas, over our beads
ing, rising to our shoulders, our necks
clo.iug, closing alas, over our beads
while there so near, oh, so distressingly
whilu there so near, oh, so distressingly
neir! our dear one, might be pressing
ne.rl our dear ones might be pressing
1 tUcir pale fccs against those very win -
their pale ft)ces against those very win-'
dow panes, perhaps, and pterin? out
dow panes, perhaps, and peering out
WouderlngIy Into tbe dark, uncanny
wouderingly iuto the dark, uncanny
night.
Tuank God, it was not to be!
nigui.
Tuank God, it was not to be!
We bad alraist glveu np in despair
wn,u th, etlftlig tide brought down
npou ng nj).i 0f tblclc . solid ic. I
or 0a4 ju.t strength enough left lo ctutcU
no j, t, ,t p g,sd, and emcU ntcosvsriiig
be pleased, we bolb succeeded in gelling
a foothold.
Aud now we were bailed from the
nearest shore. The Ilegulars had heard
our frantlo cries, nnd surmising tbo
cause, bad hastened to our rescue With
lauterns and ropes. With their timely
nid we were soon on terra firm, ouco
more, nnd wrapped Iu blankets in front
of a blazing fire, we soou lost all sense
of discomfort.
I bethobght me to look at my watch.
It bad slopped at nine. We bad been
only twenty minutes in the water only
twenty! It seemed as many years!
SOME OBSERVATIONS.
"That Is the editor, is ill"
"Yes. sir, it is."
"Well, now, Mr. Editor, I'll tell you
what I'm going to do. I'm introducing
tbe 'Morning Star' brand of coffee among
your merchants here, and if you'll give
me your address, I'll send two pounds of
the 'Morning Star' tn your bouse, I
want your wife to servo you with n cup
of i', and after you've tried it, yon may
just say what you please about it in your
paper."
Tbe editor, of course, beams with
bapplutss. The prospect Ive donation of
two pounds of choice coffee is enough to
make nuy editor happy. Unfortnnntely,
however, his family is a way for the sea
son, nnd he replies:
"If you had just ns Boon, suppose you
send that coffee up to tbe business
manager's house. Here he comrs, I'll
introduce yoa," and having done so.the
observer settled down to bard work. He
would have introduced the philanthrop
ists to tbe business manager anyhow. It
is a rule iu tbo mail office Ihat all
philanthropists shall be introduced to
tho business manager.
Tbo representative of tbo 'Morning
Star' coffee tell hi story veiy gracelully
to tbe business manager. "I'm going to
send two pounds of our superb coffee up
to your house.
Tbe business manager has met phi
lanthropists before.'
Two pounds of coffee,'' bo replies;
"bow much is Ibe coffee a pound?"
"Tblrty.flve eeuts."
"All right ; my bouse is number 2,232
Blank street. Send up yonr coffc.
Here's seventy cents."
"I beg your pardon," says the phi
lanthropist ; "I'm going to give you Ibe
coffeec, nnd"
"But I don't want you to give me tho
coffee. I'm able to pay for it."
"Yes, yes, I know that ; but you know
I expect you to reciprocate by saying
what you think about tbe 'Morning
Star' in your paper,"
"Then yon want me to give you some
thlug, do you?"
"O, no ; I simply expect you to say
whatever you think tbo coffee deserves,"
"We usually trade ou a cash basis,"
the business manager respond, "but
let's see, two pounds of coffee will be
worth seventy cents ; three Hues of local
seventy-five cents ; von owe mo a bal
ance of five cents ; It will "be very hard
work to get vtry much of a notice iuto
three liuee,but we'll close the deul if you
ay so."
Tbe philanthropist, for some reason
conldn't dispute tho newspaper finnn
cler a business logic, but still be coulu
hardly comprehend jrby bis generosity
was looked upou iu such a coldly prac
(leal manner as tbo business man applied
to it. He succumbed, bowever,tnd con
cluded that be wouldn't send the coffee
at all, but wonld make a contract for
advertising in casb.
The philanthropic scheme of the coffee
man, analjzod in a business mauner.was
every wit as business-like as it would be
on tbo part of a newspaper man to step
iuto a mercantile establishment aud say
to the proprietor: "Here, I am going
to send you my paper for three months ;
after you have read it you may give mt
just as many dollcrs' worlb of dry goods
in return as you think us deserving of."
Feculiar ideas are entertained regard
ing tbs newspaper business. More rldi-.
culons propositions are made to news
paper publishers tbah to any other class
of business men existing. Not long ago
a Texas man wrote the Mm, a letter
saying that be would appreciate tbe
publication of the "inclosed item of
general interest'" and that if tbo publish
er woul i send blm a marked copy of tbe
paper and advertising rates, be would
be pleased to send them cash cash adver
tising when be needed it. Tbe "item of
general interest'' was an advertisement.
Tbe publishers replied that if be would
kindly send fifteen dollars iu cash as a
gift and tbe rates on any money be might
have to loan, tbey would be pleased to
borrow of Mm whenever tbe occasion
arose. And why should suca absurd
popositions be made? Simply because
tbs newspsper prolession has educated a
good proportion of tbe public into the
idea that a donation to an editor of
fifteen cent, box strawberries, or n peck
of fresh vegetables, is as acceptable as u
thousand dollar gold pleoa would be to
an ordiuary man. Tbe coffee man above
referred to, after tbe conversation bad
concluded, laughingly aud fraukly added :
"That's all right it's business but we
catch lots em!'' Dxi Morxu bu.vDir
Mill.
- TAKE IT THIS MONTH-
Spring rapidly approaches, and it is
Important that every out, should be pre-
pared for the depressing effects of the
I cbauglog Benson. This is tbe time lo
t purify the blood aud streugtheu tbe
Uyatem, by taking Hood's Sarsaprilla,
whioh stands unequalled n i spriug
i medicine, aud has endorsements or a
charaoter seldom glveu any proprietary
j medicln. A book containing statements
of many wonderful cures it has accom-
, pJUhed, will be sent upon application to
0. 1.Huod iCo,, AputljaoariM, Lowell,
u Hois. 100 Dcste Os JWlar.
LI l-J , .- A ' 1--
ABSEHT-MIKDEDNE63 AND SMILES.
A popular hotel man of this city bas
determined to abandon tbe temptations
of single blessedness in March and settle
down to the enjoyment of married life.
Tuesday evening a Commercial Angel
stepped up to tbo office desk and ad
dressing tbe mauager, who was writing
on delicate note paper, naked. "What
time docs Ihe next train go south to Nor
wich on tho Central?"
Manager (promptly) March 11.
Tbe next question was:
"Is tbero a 'drawing-room' on the
train?"
Manager There will be no drawing-
room about it, it will be in tbe ohnrcb!
The laughter which followed aroused
tbe manager from bis reverie and after a
moment's refleotlon he too smiled and
was obliged to make the Commercial
Angel 'smile' in return.
tncdiscrprttourprosidont
ncilisorpruoBou r "p rosidan
c dlscrpruo sisour preside
discrprtiosid isoucprosid
isorpruosidn disourp resi
serpruosidnandisourpres
orpruosidnalandisourprc
rpruosid nalelandisourpr
pruosidnalovolnndisourp
ruosidnnlcvevolnndisour
uosidnnlevolovolnndisou
ob idnalevolClovolandlso
uos idnnlovelovelnndisou
ruosi dniilovovclandisour
pruosidnalcrclandlsourp
rpruosid nalelandisourpr
crpruosidnnlandisnurpro
cr p ruosi d nan disourp res
tso r p ruosi tin disourp rcsi
dis erpruosid isour presid
i ; : . i
uuiscrpr uueiBuurp rusiua
ncdiscrpruosour presid on
tnodisorpruourprosidont
Cau be read upward of Ave tbousaud
differeut ways by starting with tbe centre
letter C aud taking the most zigzag
course to any of the four cerners, viz,
'Cleveland Is our Fresident."
SHE WAS DISAPPOINTED.
Au English lord who visited this coun
try was at a dinner given in bis honor at
a privato residence. A little daughter of
bis host, who was too well bred to stare,
but wbo eyed him covertly as the occa
sion presented itself, finally ventured to
remark:
"Are you really and truly an English
lord?"
"Yes," he respondod pleasantly, "real
ly and truly."
"I have often thought that I would
like to see an English lord," she went on,
"and and"
"And you are satisfied at last," be in
terrupted, laughingly,
"N-no," replied tho truthful little girl,
"I am not satisfied. I'm a good dtal
disappointed.'"
FOLAB-LIKE PEDALS.
"It was fearfully cold last night," said
Smith to Jones one mornine recently, ''I
bad to gtt up iu the night and warm a
brick to put at my wife's feet,"
"Why didn't you try my plan? I slept
by myself last night and put tha cat at
my feet. The cat kept them perfectly
comfortable. Tell your wife to try the
experimeut. '
"She bas tried it, but it won't work."
'Why? Didn't the cat keep quiet at
her feet"
"Ob, yes; the cat kept quiet. It froze
to death in five minutes.'
PRACTICAL CONCORD.
"! tbero harmony in your church?"
asked tho presiding elder.
"There Is, there is," replied Deacon
Ramsgate, ''perfeot harmony; w have
dismissed the pastor, discharged the or
ganist, compelled tbo choir to resign,
discontioned tbe Sabbath and week day
meetings, discharged ths sexton and ex
pelled about one-half the members and
white-winged peace now broods softly
wilbin tbe wills of this branch of tl.e
earthly Zion. Harmony? I believe tbe
very angels envy us."
A SMART BOY.
A minister forgot to tak his sermon
with him to cburoh.and bis wife dlsoov.
erlng tbe mistake, sent it to bim In charge
of a small boy, wbo was to receive ten
cents for tbe job.
Fresently be returned for tbe money.
"You delivered tbe sermon, did you?"
she asked.
"No, mum," be replied, "I just gnril
to bim; be's n deliverln' of it himself."
THE WRONG GIRL.
On a large farm nearly in sight of tbe
quiet little town of Frederalsbnrg, Md
resides a blooming young girl of 22 sum
mers, nlo her cousin, two years her se
nior. Both of them have beans, whom
tbeir stern old father and uncle does not
approve of, Tbe lover Ko. 1 and his
sweetheart, unknown to the otber par
ties, bad made all their arrangements to
steal of in tbe still cf the night and get
married. This was also the plsn of tbe
contracting parties No. 3. Tbe liddsr
was bidden back of the garden for tb
purpose of scaling tbe walls at tba prop
er time. Iu the bewltebing bonrs of tbe
night lover No, 1 placed the ladder to
the window of girl No. 2. Tbe night
was dark just at tbat timo. She made
her exit out of tbe windiw and Into tbe
arms of ber supposed knlgbt, and was
hurried off to Ibe carriage near by. Not
a word was spoken. The carriage was
gained and tbo lash was applied to the
horses. When they arrived at the bonse
nf the preacher, wbo was waiting to tie
the knot, the gallant knight then dlsoov
ered tbat be bad got the wrong girl. Of
course there was some salts and inward
cuss words, and the tug of war cams
bow to get tbe weeping girl back undis
covered. Lover No. 2 met with an acci
dent by running bis VaZRT against a
post and carrying away his poit wheel,
i aud failed that night to arrive at tb
bouse. The old man bad bought a $13
gun, and is nightly iu ambuah for tbe
raiders.
Faith is tha medium
twlwecn dss-
pair and preemption,
-rSo'UoiJbe foi the Cuoo Apvoclnt
Bnekleu's Arnica Balve.
The best salve in the world for cuts,
brtltaes, sores, ulcere. Silt rhuem.fever tores,
teller, chapped hsnds, chilblsnds, corns,
and all skin eruptions, and positively cure
piles, or no py required. 11 is guaranteed
to give perfect satisfaction, nr money re
funded. Tries 25 cents per box.
Truth is mighty scarce.
A baby-carriage is pretly sure to be
struck by a squall
He Who feels for the poor shoutd
mako the poor feel tbe felt,
William McKnew, 124 Fnyetls s'reet,
Baltimore, Md.,snys: " I belisvo Favorite
Remedy' Is a good medicine. It is doing
ine more good than anything t ever tried,
nnd I have tried almost everything for I
am a sufferer from dyspepsia." While,
"Favorite Remedy" is a specific in stomaeh
and bladder ill.oa.ee, It is equally valuable
In eases of bilious disorders, constipation of
the bowels ami all clasiiirilis apparently in
sepsrable from tha constitutions of woman.
Few things are Impossib'lo to dili
gence nnd skill.
A little kindness goes a good ways.
God pitlsj where mortals only
blame.
It is foolish to be obstinate over
trifles.
Tha Boot of the Evil.
To thoroughly cure semfula it is neces
sary to strike directly at the root of the evil.
This isexsctly w hat Hood 's 8a rsap i ri lladoes,
by acting upon the blood, thoroughly
cleanslug it ofall impurities, aud leaviug
not even a taint of scrofula In the yitul
fluid. Thousands who havo been cured ol
scrolula by Hood's Snraaparilla, testify to
its wonderful blood-purifying qualities.
Sold by all rlrugj-iats.
Subscribe for the Cabodn Advocate
only il.00 a year.
It is not so difficult ts know ono'a
self, ns to confess the knowledge.
Each departed friend is n magnet
that attracts us to tbo next world.
Tho serene, silent beauty of n holy
life Ib the most powerful influenoo in the
world.
Tho Rev. Geo. H. Thayer, of Bourbon,
Ind', sas: "Both myself and wife owe our
llyes to Shiloh's Consumption Cure." Sold
bv W F lliery, Wsiaaport, and C T Horn,
Lehighton,
Are you made miserable br inrlieastion.
constipation, dissiness, loss of appetite, yel
low saini onuon a vitamer is a posttiy
cure. Bald by W T Btsry, Weissport, and
CT Horn, Lehighton.
Why will you cough when Shiloh's Cnt
will give immediate relief. Prir 10 cents,
50 cents and $1. Sold bv W F Bisry,
Weisaporlj C T Horn, Lohighton.
Shiloh's Catarrh Remedy a poiitir
cur for catarrh, diphtheria, and canker
mouth. 8old bv W F Bisry, Wisiport,and
C T Horn, Lsbiihton.
"Hackmatack" a lasting and fragrant
periume. rnea 3J and so cents. Bold by
W V Blery, Weisaport, and 0 T Horn, Le
highton. Bhlbh's Cur will imraedistoly relieve
croup, wnooping cough and broneuins.
8oId by W F Bisry, Wisspor; C T Horn,
Lienigiiion.
For dyspepsta and liver aomplaint, you
hay a printed gusrantes on every bottle
of Bhiloh's Vitalitsr. It never fails to euro.
8old by W F Bisry, Weissport; O T Horn,
jjcmgnton.
A nssal injector free with each bottla ef
Shiloh's Catarrh Remedy. Fries iu eonts.
Sold by W F lliery, Weissport, 0 T Horn,
Liemgoion.
Blind pleople cannot be carpenters,
because tbey never saw.
"Poets are born," says a writer. 8a
are other men, but when they get old
enough they generally reform.
A Madison street girl's auswer to the
current conundrum : "Will the coming
man work?" is "He will if I get him.'
"It is said that a goose drinks water
one hundred times a day. Soma geese
don't drink water at all.
Drunkenness, or the Liquor Habit, cm be
cured by administering Dr. Hainti'
Golden Specific-.
II can be given In a cup of coffee or tea
without tb knowledge of tbs person tailing-,
It, flectlng a speedy and permanent euro,
whether tbs patient is a moderate drinksr
or an alcoholic wreex. Tboussnds of
drunkards hay been mad temperate man
wbo have taken tbe Golden Speeiflo In their
coffee without their knowledge, and to-day
believe they quit drinking of their own free
will. No harmful allaeta laiult Irom its
administration. Cures guaranteed. Circulars
and testimonials sent free.
Addrsss,GoLsx Srsoiric Co.,
1S5 Race St, Cincinnati, O.
We should never wed an opinion for
better or for worse ; what we take upon
good ground we should lay down upon
better
A ohserfnl way a talking will soon
abase away gloomy feelings in oar own
minds, and we all know how inspiring
to ns are snob words from another.
"Anna, what must yoa do, before
anything else to have your sins forgiven?'
"Commit tbe sins."
It is spring. A resurrection of nature's
latant foreas Is taking plae. Llka the
world around you, renew yoar complexion
invigorat your powers, cleans tb ohan
nels of III. Avar's Ssrsaparilla is the
means to us for this purpose.
No iault cau be as bad as tbe feeling
whioh is quick to sea, aud speak of tb
faults of others.
-One of the bsst rules In couversation
is never to say anything tbat any oue
present cau wish unsaid.
Fully tl understand a grand and
beautiful thought, requires p;rhnps as
tuueU time as to conceive it.
Vary Remarkable Recovery.
Mr. George V. Willing, ol Manehsiter,
Idieh., writes i "My il lias been alinns
helpless lor live years, so helpless Ihat Sh
could not turn over in bed a'one. She use
two bottles ol Electric li:tler, aud is sn
much improved, that she Is able now to
ber i.wn wirk.
Eleclrio bitters will d all that Is cla'med
for thain. Hundreds of testimonials attest
their great curativ powers. Only fitly
rents a bottle by T. D. Thomas.
"There are good aud bid points
about tbU enffse," ald the biar.ler in n
iudicial ion. "Tba oood uolnt is that 1
I then is no el icksry in It ; the bad, tl at
there is no cofft i I it."
Subscribe for tbs Cinox Acvooatb I
only 11.00 a ywr, i
the .kat mm
REMKDY
FOR PAIN.
lUUeval e4 easts
IU1EUKATISM,
Nouralgflft,
Sclatlea, UmbeeA
BACKAeax,
niiioii, nratm
SORE TRRMT;
QCLvsr.swrxuxos,
SjrRAIXS,
briatss, We, Irthes,
ntotTsrntai
ns7KS,scjLt,Ml
ia a! Se yi eaM
mnnniMBi
ftoUVf aMtMwttrie-eM
Dttbrt. Bin ihll aa IS
ioa.
Tit CauUi A. Tiffin Ca,
(S naa.TaHea
j!!5MIUH!JliS
lill!effllKtu
KaaMaMMIleUaflbHaSSCflB
For Something Very Klce Irs th Wsf ef
Ladies', Gsnt'a a&4 Caildrwil
BOOTS, SHOES & GAITERS
OU TO
Peter Heim,
ppetlle tha Public Sasare, BARK Stmt,
Lelihrhton, where you will flat a Laura- essrl
'aahlonable Stock lo selaet from at lowest
Cash Prices. Alio Ladles' an4 (Hat's
Boots ana Shoes Mads to Order
ob she notice. Dost Material aad Week
raanablp guaranteed. Prices ar fally
Low as elsewhere. Tear catreisg Is ver
cordially Invited. y U-tsI
JET. H. Peters,
THE TAILOR,
3
a
o
73
SUITINGS!
Very Moderate Prises sad Per Kt 1ts U tt
motto or this Eitaellihnnat. YOU are ta
vltsd te Inspeot foods.
if. h. rrrEEi,
Post Offles Btlldlng, BARS Straw ,
April 34, it LUf ktoe, T
Rev. Father Wilds1
EXPERIENCE.
Tbe Her. . T. TU4s, rrelt-tae-sra eJ
missions tn New York, sa4 ttrwtt
of Use lata eminent Judge Wilds, of (h
Massaehusetta Snprema CoszK ealllae
as follows i
"TO B. Ulk SI Kim Tori, Uag 1, lot
Musns. J. C AVER & Co., GentlonMa I
Last winter I wu troubled with a tasst
uncomfortable Itching humor atfettaf
mora especially my limbs, which I toned s3
rntolerauy at nlgui, and burned so lctasso
ly. that I ooojd searorly bear any clothing
ever shorn. I was also a srn7rr frooa a
severe catarrh and catarrhal eorifh; arry
appetlta was poor, and my system, a gostt
dat ran down. Knotting the rsla ef
Avon's SAasarAtULLA, by obcervatton' of
many ether cases, and from personal se
In former yoars, I began taking It for tb
abovo-uamod disorders. My Appetlta tav
proved almost from the first aoa. jtteajr
a short time the fever and Itching wr
allayed, and all slims of Irritation ef ttut
skin dlft.iprto.tred. Mv catarrh, and aotjfftt
were auo cureu uy tne
aarna :
my general health greatly Improved, turttl
It Is now excellent. I feel a nundred per
cent ttroocor. and I attribute lliess laselta
to the use at tho SABSxrAKitLA, which
I roeommoad wnh all eonadene es m
burnt blood
Ufdlclce ever devised. X leek
h in small doe three time a dasr.
d, lo all, lea than two bottles, i slaca
r. tn
eiKwo iw. a jour ecrrioa, poHU ateaar
publication may do good.
Years respeoUu lly, X. T. WlLM."
Tbe aboro Instance la bat on of the taacry
eoastantty coming to our notice, whioh stove
the porfoct adaptability of Avca's BASAU
n IULL4, to tie our o( all diseases artalnji
trout lniporo or Impoverished blood, cist
weakened vitality,
Ayer's Sarsaparilla
sleansea, oorlebes, and strengthens ths bleed,
,tltuulalA the notion of tbe stomach and
bowels, and thoreby enables the systwa to)
roalat and overcome thu attaeks of all rreW
lous Dlttatcj, h'ruttllom cf f SH, .IAms.
jtu-,'"OUijTh, Cturml DtlUltg, and all
lloordors resulting from poor or corraptad
b'tood and a low state nf the system.
i-nri-anxD nv
Dr. J. C.Ayor&Co., Lowell, Matt.
iold by all Pruciistj; price SI, six bottki'
for $S.
AYER'S
CATHARTIC
PJLLS.
BOSt PUfgntlVO
Modlclno
! WrjCor-stipatlori i Indlfestlon,lIeadaclsand
M iniwiM iawiihh,
BoM OYcarwbvre, Alwwj-s tellafc, ,
UeWa-tter. Af work warraetttf.