American volunteer. (Carlisle [Pa.]) 1814-1909, November 17, 1870, Image 1

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    iSlie llolimtcer
PUBLISHED EVERY THURSDAY MOUNINU
• XJ HATTON & KENNEDY ,
DFFKE-SOIITH market square.
terms s—Two Dollars per year If paid strlotly
!n advance; Two Dollars and Fifty Cents If paid
‘lrlthln three months; after which Three Dollars
"in dp chanted. Those terms will bo rigidly ad
h.'rfifl to In every Instance. No subscription dib
miiilnuod nntl l all arrearages are paid, unless at
tlieoptlon of the editor.
iJrotessinnal c atos*.
JJNITED STATES CLAIM
AND
HEAL ESTATE AO EE GJ
VVM',, B. BUTLER,
ATTORNEY AT r,AW,
Oftirc in Frnrlilin-Honpe.-PotJTirHfi'bbvcrStrco*’
Carlisle, Cumbeihipd counly. Penua.
Applications by mall, will receive imrfiedlato
attention. *
Particular alien tlon given to the Belling or rent
ing nf Ileal Eatate, In town or country, in all let
ters of Iminlry, please enclose postage stamp.
julyll.lWO-tf
TAMES H. GRAHAM, Jit.,
° ATTORNEY AT LAW,
NO.U SOTUII HANOVER ST,.
CAnr.lSIiF. PA.
OFFlCE—Adjoining Judge Graham's.
March 31. IS7U—tf
Jjl JE. UELTZHOOVUIi,
'attorney-at-law,
CARLISLE. PA. *
iJ3*onico on South Hanover Street, opposite
Pctit/.’H dry goods store. •
Pec. I. iwfi.
jj UiMKIGH & PAKKEJJ,
ATTORNEYS AT LAW. •
OilK'o on Main SUoot, iu Marlon Unll, Car'
lisle, Fa. .
Doc. 2 WOS—
WM. J. SHEARER, Attorney and
Counsellor at Law, has removed his
nllire to the* hitherto, unoccupied room . in the
North East, corner of tho Court House.
. Juu. 2S, ’(ill—ly
W KENNEDY, ATTORNEY AT LAW
, Carlisle, I'tmua. Olllco sumo as lhatol
tho "American Volunteer.”
Dee. 1 ISM. ' ■
eu. GECIIGE S. SEARIGHT, Den
-rrsT. From (he linttimore Codeufc of Dental
■«•//. Ofllceal the residence of his mother
Ktusi Louthor Street, three doors below Bedford
Carlisle, Denim.
Doc. 1 ISGS.
.ana iffavrf
jp K K 9 H A XI K I V A h
OF ALL THIS
A 751 r STYLJIA
11. A T S AND CADS. .
Tiie subscriber has just opened at No. 15 North
Ihiiuvcr Street, a few doors North of the Carlisle
hejMJsIL Bank, one of the hugest and best Stocks
■if HATS and CADS ever oll'ered In Carlisle.
Silk Hats, Cussimero of allstyles and qualities,
Still' Brims, dlUWent colors, and every descrip
tion of Soft Hals now made.
The Dunkurd and Old Fashioned Brush, con
stantly on hand and made to order, all warrant
ed to givo.HiitlHluctlon.
A full assoi tmeul of
MEN’S,
BOY’S, AND
. . CHILDREN'S,
hats;
I nave also added .to my Slotnc, notions of difler
en kinds, consisting of
' LAD.ES* AND .GENTLEMEN’S STOCKINGS
Ncck Suspemters,
OHlurs, Gloves.
Pencils, 'thread,
~ iiewinu Silk. Umbrellas , dre
KRIiME, SEGARS AND TOBACCO
ALWAYS ON HAND.
fill vo mo a call, and'exnmlno my stock ns I feel
coniklent of pleasing all, besides saving you mo
ney
JOHN A. KELLER, Af/ent,
No. 15NorLh Hanover Street.
Oct. 1870.
JJATS AND CAPS!
DO YOU WANT A NIUE HAT OR CAF ?
If ho .Don’t Fail to Call on
'J. G. CAL'LIO,
NO. 2U. WES 7 MAIN STIihKT,
W’luuo can bo Keen tho llncst assortment of
HATB.A N D CAPS
cvtr bnmi'liL to Carlisle- He takes great pleas
ure in inviting his old friends and customers,
am! ail new ones, to his splendid stock Just re
ceived from New York and Philadelphia, con
sisting in part of line
SIUC AND CASSIMERB HATS,
besides an 6ndless variety of Hats and Caps of
the latest style, all ol which he will sell at the
Lowest Criih Price*. Also, his own manufacture
Huts always on hand, and
HATS MANUFACTURED TO ORDER.
Ho has t’“-*'hest arrangement for coloring Hats
and all tciiius of Woolen Goods, Overcoats, Ac., at
tue shortest notice (as lie colors every week) and
on the most reasonable, terms. Also, a line lot ol
choice brands of
TOBACCO AND CIGARS
always on hand. Ho desires to call thoattcutlou
of persons who have
OOUiNTRV t’URS
to sell, as he pays the highest cash prices for lie
same.
Give him a call, at tho above number, his dd
-Hand, jus he fools coulldent of giving entire satis
faction.
'’ct.hTO.
linotfi flnD
gTKOHM A BPONBLER,
No Itf - , A Hanover Street .
CARLISLE, PA,
Thankful for the patronage extended* thorn
borotofore, do now announce their usual largo
Mock uf SPRING STYLES.of
BOOTS AND SHOES
FOR
IiADIES* AND MISSES’,’
GENTS’ AND BOYS’,
YOUTHS’ AND CHILDS’,
which are unrivaled for comfort aud beauty
Also
TRUNKS AND VALISSES,
MEN AND BOYS’ HATS,
All or which will ho sold at small profits. Call
ouaand all aud get a full equivalents for your
Ulnupy.
Oct, 12 IR7o—ly
Q H i 3 A P COAL!
5 U ots. REDUCTION,
On current market rates,
TO FAMILIES:
, Nut. Egg.
HICKORY SWAMP, 84 25 86 so
WllllEßllY, -160 5 73
UNi.or.K, § 4 60 5 75
WRENS VALLEY, . 475 580
Baltimore coal. 50 000
Coal delivered toulL partaor the town at the
nliovo prlata.
TO LIMEBURNERS:
« Nut. Pea.
“ICICOUY SWAMP, S-100 33 00
125 3 25
" -125 5 23
IA’KENS VALLEY, 150 550
t i® r( * erH NubJoef. to any changes In tho market at
utne ui shipment,
~I'armer.snucl Llmebnrners, along the lino of
ounnberlund Valley Uullroiul, furnished
Co A[ tlt P | „' , llni?ly low rates.
Ardors llllud with despatch.
n „, _ GEORGE ZINN,
ucl * 2n,7o—tf Gillen,co**- V iinmul PlttSls,
RUCTION,
Mr. XT’. A. lIABRIS,
‘iH, r J np . r,y un Auctioneer of tho city of Harris
irg, has been licensed u United States
AUCTIONEER,
for Cumberland county, and would take
n ''V no, hud of informing his friends that ho Is
inn 'n‘ !, l l ° CRY SALES, upon the most Uea
fcoiiutjtfi forms.
~*,J vll, K hud considerable experience as an
tb 1,0 prides himself upon giving on
i>(m Ml ,llc tb>n to nil parlies who may engage
x i,Remember, my icims will ho made as
o Was possible. All orders left at the
p U A K K li I N HOUS E ,
• or ut the
hkaim t e u • s or ric k ,
ttUlbo promptly attended to; or address,
K A. iIAKIvIS,
Carlisle, J*n
K ep. 8,7U-tl
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BY BRATTON & KENNEDY,
<9c» (Boons.
GOODS! NEW GOODS II
•AT THE
(lIEJP DRY WDS STOIlli,
D. A. SAWYER,
Opposite the Martel House,
Has justopened alargo and well selected stock
FALL AND WINTER
DRYGO O D S ,
embracing overyvarlcty of design and fabric.
Black Silks. Colored silks, silk Poplins. French
lopllny. Lhipress and Mixed Poplins, Wool
Serges. Wool Hops, Velouis, Victoria Plaids,
Sluaitand Hob Roy Plaids, Colored Poplins, Al
pneens. A superior brand of Black Alnaccns.
wlilch for weight, lustre, and price excels uny
other In the market. • 3
DO ME STIC GOODS,
MUSLINS, 0 14, 8, 10, 12U. 15
CAI.IJOEH. ip;-;. 8, ID, I2<s.
GINGHAMS, hy' 14. lo' i ;
TICKINGS, 12>5, 15. 18. 25
DELAINES, 15, 18, 20,
FLANNELS, FLANNELS,
Ali tho best makes at tho lowest prices.
BLANKET DEPARTMENT,
A fresli stock of Whlto and Colored in from
the mills.- Very cheap, ’
CLOAKING CLOTHS,
Velveteens, Water Proof, SI.OO ami upwards.
SHAWLS, SHAWLS,
Broehft Shawls. Thibet Shawls. Striped Shawls
and Blanket Shawls. Price* away down.
NOTIONS IN ALL VARIETIES,
Breakfast Shawls, Ladles’ and Childrens’ Merino
Vests, Men’s Moilno shirts. Wove Yarns Zeph
ors, Hosiery, Laces, Embroideries, Gloves. Jou
vlns Kid Gloves.
FURS! FURS! FURS I
Fresh stock In from the manufacturers, less
than city prices, ’
A full 11 no of Men’s and Boys’ uasslmers.—
bolts made to order at lowest price's.
We wit h over.\ body to call and examine onr
cheap stock and got some of tho bargains, as you
can save 2c per cent. • *
<3, *O. D, A. SAWYER.
D UY GOODS!
DRY GOODS!!
HARPER’S
South Hanover SC.,
NEW .STOCK OF FALL GOODS,
I take pleasure In ottering to ray patrons and
tho public, a stock of
DRY GOODS,
complete in every branch, and not excelled In
quality, beauty, and cheapness, I have now
open a beautiful stock of
FASHIONABLE DRESS ' GOODS,
comprising Black Bilks, Black and Colored Air-
Wool Reps, Black and Colored All-Wool Pop
lins. HJack.and Colored Wool Delaines, Black
and Colored Morlnoes, Rich Plaid Popllps, Ber
gen. .Voiool*«, Fine 'lionise, Bombazines. Pure
Mohairs, new brand of Double Waip Black Al
paca, for beauty oi color, w-lght of texture, and
price, it lakes the lead of any Alpacas In tho
market.
Fashionable Shawls, In new styles or Stripes
nml'Plaids.
; Long and square Thibet Shawls, ali of which
I oiler exceedingly cheap.
BLANKETS,
White and Gray. Bargains guaranteed.
FLANNELS,
in every variety. ’
LADIES’ CLOAKINGS—BIade Beavers, Velve
ts'ns, White Corduroy. Opera Flannels, Plaids
for Circulars
WATER-PROOF I WATER-PROOF I
House Furnishing Dry Goods, Table l.lneus
Napkins and White Goods.
All the popular brands of Domestics, at prices
lo meet Hie lowest quofailons.
•Merino Vests, whirls, and Drawers, for Ladies,
Misses, Men and Boys.
Knitting Yams, Zephyrs, Germantown Wool,
pprsltuWooJ, and Bulmoial Yarns. Hamburg,
.Edgings and Insertlngs, Thread Lares, Gnlpue
Luces. Linen ami Lace Collars. Kid* Gloves.
Handkerchiefs, Felt, Balmoral,and Hoop Skirts,
Corsets, aud u general variety of notions,
CLOTHS AND CASSIMERE9,
Furs 1 Furs i Furs !
NohfSltnncy Insnylug that the prices trill be
as low us any In town.
All goods bought at tho head of tho mnrkct.
for cosh, and superior inducements will bo offer
ed at the Cheap Cush more,
Cor. Hanover and Pomfret & is.,
THOS. A. HARPER.
Oct. 20* 70*
E W G O O D 8!
• Wo havo just returned from trio city, with
another very heavy stork of Goods, making our
stock the largest ever held in Carlisle, by any
othei House. Wo have extra good ana thick
BLACK SILKS, COLORED SILKS,
SILK POPLINS, ol all shades.
SILK AND WOOL EPJNGLINES
'OOL REPS,
WOOL PLAIDS,
ALPACCAB AND DELAINES,
MOURNING GOODS.
all kinds.
PLAIN AND FANCY SACKING FLANNELS
WATER PROOFS AND CLOAKINGS,
CLOTHS AND CASSIMERES*
QUILTS AND COVERLETS,
Carpets, anil Oil-Cloths,
domes tM.c goods
lu great variety.
Shawls, Gloves, Hosiery, <ic.
We have as a whole the most splendid assort
ment of Goods outfide of the cities. We have
the very best and most handsome
SASH RIBBONS,
In the town, all of which we are Belling cheaper
and at smaller protlta than any other big store
In the United Slates.
Give us a call and you will save a good deal of
money lu your'purcbaaes. & CQ
Nov. 10,70,
PAPER and envelopes,
Lend nml alnto Pencils, Guitar and Violin
Slrlnifs. Pocket Unolcs, n full line Artists Rub
bers, bteel Pens nnd Holders, nt
J. B. HAVERSTICK’S.
Nov. 3,70.
JVq'UItSINU BOTTLES
Of nil descriptions, nt
j. b: haverbtick's,
iVo, 5, tfoii/A Hanover Street.
Nov. 3, 70.
IfMtel.
WIIKJr TO woo.
Boat thou Idly flak to hear
At what gentle seasons
Nymphs relent when lovers near
Press tho tenuerost reasons? -■
Ah, they give their faith too oft
To the careless wooer;
Malden hearts are always soft:
Would that men’s were truer.
Woo tho fair one, wh a ivaround
Early birds are singing;
When o’er all the frngmnt ground,
Early herbs are springing:
When the brook-side bank and grove,
AH with blossoms laden,
Shlnq with beauty, breathe oflove—
Woo tho timid maiden.
Who her when, with rosy blush,
Rummer eve is sinking;
When, on tho rills that.softly gush,
Stars are softly winking;
When, through houghs that knlttho bower.
Moonlight gleams are stealing;
Woo her. till tho gentler hour
Wake a gentler feeling.
Woo her. whon.nntumnal dyes
Tinge tho woody nrrfhntnlii;
When the drooping foliage lies
In the weedy fountain ;
Let the scene that tolls how fast
Youth is passing over.
Warn her, ere her bloom Is past,
To securoherlover.
Woo her. when the north winds call
At. the lattice nlohtly;
When, within the cheerful hall,
Blaze the fagots brightly ;
While the wintry tempest round
Sweeps the landscane hoary.
Sweeter in her ear shall sound
Love’s delightful story.
Nisg4larttfuri„
JIY STEP-MOTHER.
. *1 wonder what papa has gone to Gien
vllle so anon again for? Do you know,
Mrs. AJlen ?' 1 asked of the lady who
acted as housekeeper in our family for the
four yeats that we three children bad
been written 'motherless.'
'I did not ask him,’she replied..
Her evasive reply increased my suspl- 1
oion, ami after twirling my napkin a
moment, I said : *
Well, we sometimes know the reason
of things, and therefore, are not obliged
to ask for information.' After u mo
ment's silence, she replied:
‘No, Nellie, I do not know for wha;
purpose your father visits Glenvllle.'
‘But strongly suspebt,'I persisted, ‘and
so do I. Do you. not?'
‘lf so, I do not'think it beat to say any
thing about it.'
Two'davs after papa returned, and after
lea, we gathered in the parlor, for papa
is a lawyer, and did not stay in his office
during the. evenings. Mrs. Allen .took
up her knitting,Florie wasembroldering
ui d I took up a magazine, but not to
read. I had told Florie that. the next
time papa asked me losing, I should sing
tiie piece entitled ‘I Cannot Call Her
Mother,’ and a-« I was momentarily ex
pecting such a request, I was trying to
get up sutllcient courage to do so. But
papa sat in his easy chajr, with his head
thrown back and his ej es closed. I stole
a look at him mid whispered to F one,
‘Doubtless papa Is thinkingpf the fasci
nating lady who la to be tho future Mrs.
Gordon.’ Before Florie could reply,
pdpa opened bin eyc» and asked me to
play, and I rose with a little fluttering
the heart id do so. ’ I look up a pile of
music in order to gain lime, and looked
it over, then laying it down upon the
music stand, I struck the first noleon the
prelude of the piece I had- said I would
play. Before 1 began the words, Mrs.
Allen left the room.. She knew what it,
was, and thought it might lead to re-
marks that she would not like to hear.—
My voice never once faltered as 1 sang it
with’ ns mu h feeling as I could throw
into the words. When I had finished,
there was perfect silence In tho room for
a few. moments. I finally began a lively
march, but papa in lemoned me, and said
in a pleasant tune :
‘You need not play any more this even-.
ing, rseiJie, for me. I hope you did not
king those verses because they expressed,
your sentiments, did you ?’
‘I do not know what difference it can
make to any one whether these lines ex
press our feelings or not,'l replied, rath
er coldly.
‘lt wi’.l make some difference with
yr ur future happiness/ he continued. ‘I
am to.be married soon, and ol course that
will make the lady your mother. Are
you not prepared to receive as such any
one I may select, and give her tho affec
tion of a daughter? 1
Morie hurst Into tears, and though I
felt a choking sensation in the throat,’ I
replied with some spirit:
*Of comae i shall treat the future Mrs.
Gordon with respect if she can command
it; hut I have a mother , though she be
in her grave, whom 1 cannot forget, if
others can, u ith such apparent ease/
‘Nellie, you forget yourself, if-you mean,
to insinuate that I have forgotten your
mother. I have not nor never shall; but
you couldjnot umlerntand ray feelings if
1 should explain them'; therefore I will
say no more. You can a'’t at your own
pleasure about loving her, but you must
not forget that she will be mistress of the
house. .How is it with you, niy daugh
ter?’ turning to Florie, and his voice had
a tenderer tone than when lie spoke to
me; ‘do you share your sister’s feelings?’
•Oh papal T do not want a new mam
ma.’
‘Why dr yon-care, Floile?’
‘Because she will spoil our plans and
make us .do just what we do not wish to,
aud watch us all the time, and—and— 1
•Who told you all that, my dear?’
‘Nellie/
‘Why. Nellie T thought you had too
much sense to talk to a younger'sister In
such n way as that!’
‘Well/ I replied angrily, ‘I would Mice
to know if there was ever a step mother
who was l ot as cross, and disagreeable,
and hateful us she could be. i never
heard of one/
‘By what means do you become so ex
tensively informed on the subject of step
mothers?’ asked papa ironically.
‘Well, there Is a description of one in
‘Candline’s Tria’s,' and one in ‘Mercia
Merton;’ besides, I have known ,two
young ladies who were blessed with such
usurpers at home, and I gained some of
my extensive information from them.’
‘Bo from the overdrawn pictures of
trashy novels, and the sensation stories
of schoolmisses, vou judge of the whole.
If your mind is so prejudiced, it will take
u more able advocate than myself to show
you on what a flimsy base your opinions
are constructed; therefore, wo will say
no more about It.’
* * * * * # * * *
The evening came on which papa and
his wife—how my lips curled as I spoke
the word—were expected. I bad just
said to Florlo, ‘ What can’t be cured must
be endured,’ but she will soon learn what
frigid politeness means from me, and I
hope you too. I'll own I’m anxious to
see her, for I cannot exactly determine
what coulee to pursue till I do.
‘I punted to ask papa how oho looked,
but I didn’t dare to after you sang that
song to him,’ returned Florle, when we
heard the carriage at the door.
‘Smooth your hair now and pin your
collar straight,’ I hastily exclaimed,
‘Don’t let Mrs. Gordon think you a heath
en. to whom she Is to act the part of mis
sionary-’
We had taken tea'nnd were in the par
lor. I had taken mammas portrait .and
hung it in the. room X«\orieand I occupi
ed. Wo had one there then, hut I re
marked to Florlo, ns I curried it upstairs,
‘Ain’t I good to save Mrs Gordon all the
trouble possible? Now wo can have one
apiece-’ ,*
CARLISLE, PA„ THURSDAY, NOVEMBER IT, 1870,
I felt ready nervous when the carriage
stopped at the door, but I did not follow
Ned and Fiorio us they rushed into the
parlor till alter they had been to tho di
ning room and partaken of some refresh*
ments. As papa presented his ‘eldest
daughter l to his wife, I rose and coldly
offered my band. The ludy who was
hereafter to. occupy..roy..dear mother’s
place id The household was about thirty
years of age, of medium height, good
lookin'/, and a pleasaotsmile lighted her
face, ns she held-my hand a moment aud
•Imped 1 was well. 1 Later in the even
ing she expressed a desire to hear me
play. I did not rise immediately ; but
when she said, ‘Do not unless it is per
fectly agreeable to you.* ‘Most certainly
it is.’ I replied, and selecting the one, *1
Sit and Weep by M> Mother's Grave, 1 os
the most appropriate one I could And, I
sung it with much pathos for my heart
was full of grief and my eyes ol unshed
tears. I rose from the. piano, and glunc- 1
ed at papa and his new. wife. Her eyes
were full of tears as she said to me In a
low loue:
‘You sung it with much feeling,Nellie;
probably more because you cun sympa
thize with U e author, uud I cun sympa
thize with both. I have no mother, uud
I too have loved—
"To sit and weep
Beside dear mother’s grave ”
This was so different from what T ex
pected that I could not reply, and merely
bowed my head. As we entered the break
fast room the following morning, Mrs.
Gordon took the head of the table, and,
foolish child that I was, felt the angry
blood rush to toy face. I had occupied
that place six months—ever since I had
donned long dresses—and I thought she
took mamma’s place and mine to. After
papa lias gone down town, and Mrs. Gor
don Florie and myself were leflat home,
she chatted so pleasantly with us that I
had almost regretted the part I bad deter*
mined to act; but when the gardener
came in, and directing bis remarks tome,
asked if he should take up all the dahlia,
roots for the winter, I grew angry and
said : ‘You con ask Mrs. Gordon. I shall
not direct yi u any more about the flow
era.’ I did not look at her to notice the
effect of my words, hut Florie said her
facecolored. However, her voice was calm
as she said, *1 will go into the garden in
a- moment 9ud teii you,’ and taking a
shawl she parsed out, leaving me asham
ed that I did not speak in a less ungra
cious manner.
I need not mention every little act of
hers that slowly hut surely undermined
the prejudice that, I bud against step
mothers which I had Imbibed from early
childhood. A few weeks ufiershe became
a member of our household she tapped at
my chamber, and after coming in ui.d
eiuing a low.moments, which was spent
In pleasantconversation, she said to met
‘Was not one.of those portraits of your
m()t . ' * *
jother taken from the parlor, Nellie?'
.'The one over the table was,' 1 replied,
I hung it there a‘few weeks ago;’
‘Well, If you a e willing I will replace
it/ she continued, ‘so that all the.family
cap have the same pleasure you do. I
think your forehead resembles her’s very
much/ she added, as she stepped in a
chair and took it down.
I had not a word to utter. I felt that I
was killed with kindness; yet, after all
this, I endeavored to maintain that re*
serve of manner that I had determined
should ever characterize my deportment
toward her. The time for the closing of
the school came, and I asked papa Jo get
me an expensive set of coral and gold or-
natuents to wear. ‘I will think of it/ he
returned ; but when wo were alone he
auid to me:
‘Ellen, If you call my wife mother, X
will net thpMH for you. -I do Hot
like to hear you call her Mrs. Gordon, es
pecially before strangers.’
‘Very well/ x returned, *1 can do with
out them ; they are not absolutely neces
sary to my happiness. 5
The morning of the'exhibition day
came and as I was leaving the institution
I saw Mrs. Gordon come outof thejewel-.
er’aand walk hastily home. I followed,
vexed and almost angry- I thought to
myself, ‘if 1 call her mother at dinner,
pupa will notice it ami get me the orna
ments while I am dressing, and 1 cun
wear them to the exhibition this after
noon and to the party this evening. T
wonder what Emma Andrews would say
if I should us I told her I never would,
whije I-lived, and I won t, so lbat’B de
cided. 1
Dinner over, I went tip to my room to
dress, fo. the exercises were 10 commence
at twth As I stood hy the table, I noticed
p email kid ease, with a slip of paper on
it. I opened the paper, which boie my
name on the outside, and read : ‘Will
Nellie accept tills from her friend, Alice
Gordon ?' In the box lay the long coveted
ornaments in their satin bed. This last
act of forbeuiunceaiul love was more than
ev« n I could endure, a d I sobbed bitter
ly, while conscience upbraided me for the
past I, did not wish to 'go down, and as
Klorie was dressed I wrote on a slip of
paper: Accept the thunks ofyour daugh
ter Eden,’ and she carried It to mother,
as I (hen determined to call her.
In a lew moments I heard steps ap
proaching, and turning I laid my head
on herslioulder and murmured: ‘Forgive
me, mother.*
Gently she smoothed back the heavy
muss of hair from my forehead, T did
not do this to buy your love, Nellie,' she
said. ‘I hope you would have plveu that
without this testimony of affection.’
From that day the moat perfect confi
dence existed between us, and I ever
found herulrue friend—a faithful advi
ser; And now, though a decade of years
have passed away, I-still remember the
ion of satisfaction that rested on tier
face, at the result of her labor-of love,
when I yielded to the dictates of my bet
ter nature, and gave her a daughter’s love
and respect.
A little child whose lips have just learn
ed to speak that .sweetest of all words —
mamma—is sleeping iii her tlny-couch at
my side; and when I think of the future;
of the little one God has committed to my
cure, 1 pray to the Great Disposer of all
human events, that if I be called to leave
her, while yet her feet are id the thorny
paths of childhood uud youth, that she
may find as faithful a friend through a
stepmother, as she whom in my early
youth I learned to call by that name.
This wide and unfounded prejudice
against the class referrrd to has caused
much unhappiness in' many families.
Let ull who have the care of children
do ul) In their power to disabuse their
young minds of such a feeling.
Experience has taught me that onejnay
find a true, faithful mid loving friend even
in the person of a stepmother.
How this Timber Goes.—The present
Consumplionof wood in tin United States
is enormous. One hundred and fifty
thousand acres of the best timber Is cut
every year to supply the demand for rail
way sleepers alone.- For railroad bridges,
repairs and cars, the annual expenditure
in wood is thirty-eight millions of dol
lars. In a single year theiocmnotives In
the United States consume fifty six mil-
lions of dollars* Worth of wood. There
are, in the whole country, more than Your
hundred thousand artisans In wood; and
if tiie value of their labor is one thousand
dollars a year each, the wood industry o(
(he country represents an amount of near
ly live hundred millions of dollars per
annum.
It will bo seen, therefore, how expen
sive are (he interests dependentuoou the
production of lumber. Probably laws will
have eventually to bo enacted by the leg
islatures of the different States to prevent
.such destruction of the forests as will bo
likely to result in natural injury to the
country, and it may Le necessary to en
courage tiie planting of forests to meet
the demands of the tuture.
That waaucheerful ‘Fifteenth Amend
ment*' wj.ien he was arrested for stealing
half a carcass of mutton from a stall, but
us a defense, that since he became a voter
ho thought ho ought to ‘take sides some
where,*
TIXE OItKEN I.ANTERN.
, I think I am safe in saying that Paul
Stanford hated me from the time we were
little boys at sohoo) together* up to the
; period of which lam going to tell you.
Unfortunately we hud always in
some sense' rivals. We were nearly of
\ the .same age—our tastes were some*
what similar—our circumstances In life
much alike, and we were In the same
classes and studied the same hooks.
Probably it was more bt cause I applied
myself Qloser to my studies than he did.
that I outstripped Paul, and under all
circumstances where scholarship was
concerned, boreoff the prize. Naturally,
be was quite us clever us I was—a little
more brilliant, indeed—but he lacked ap
plication, and we all know that to be
come a scholar requires tlmeand practice :
ami hard study, even if one Is a genius
iu the begiuuinv.
Paul had one decided* advantage over
Qie. 'He was handsome and graceful,
and all the.girls in the vicinity made
him aware of ic. He was self-conceited,
naturally—and the adulation be received
made him vain. Nothing makes a fool
of a man more speedily than to have
the women make too much of him.
Gay, and gallant, and courteous, he
was to them all; but he coveted the love
of only one. Florence Wayne was a
sweet little brunette of two or three and
twenty, and all the ypung men in town
were in love with her.
She hud only Jived in Marley two
years. Her native place was Philadel
phia, but her father’s health requiring a
change of air, they had come to Marley
and established themselves In u pretty
cottage out on the Po % nal road.
Florence was accomplished In no or
dinary degree, and she hud traveled a
great deal, which is after all the best way
to educate one’s self. In Philadelphia
she had moved in .the first society, but
she did not hold herself above taking
purl in our rustic merry-makings, and at
the buckings, aud apple bees and dunces
she was tlie life of.the company.
To do Florence justice, she
none of her suitors; was klud and cour
teous, nothing more. As for me, 1 hud
been a beauty-worshipper always, and
when I met Florence VVuyne I saw for
the lirst lime my ideal woman. My heart
went rom me and never came hack
again. In my wildest dreams Iliad nev
er imagined ever so faintly 'that such a
glorious vision ever could come upon me
in dull, prosy old Mariey, where nothing
ever did happen year in and year out. 1
hud seen very little of tue world, and
was shy and awkward, aud the passion I
feit for beautiful Florence, did not tend
to make me less embarrassed iu her pres
ence. The factofit was, the sight of her
confused me to such a degree that! was al
ways making myseif ridiculous before her,
and 11 she hud not been the.kindest
hearted girl iu existence, sue would have
indulged iu many a hearty laugh at my
expense. •
• Once I summoned up courage enough
to invito her to ride with me. I had as
fine a horse as there was In the country,
and a good buggy, and might have en
joyed myself if 1 had not been so awk
ward.
As it was, I had trod on Florence’s i
drees, struck her bonint with my elbow ;
In getting Into the carriage, switched the
whip in her face, and did a score of other i
things which I would have died to pro
ven t, She made me so terribly conscious ■
that 1 possessed hands and feet that must'
he disposed of some way, and how this
disposition was to be accomplished wan
the question.
Paul Stanford loved Florence.also, but
his love, did not make u fool of him us
mine did of me. He was always just so
polished and brilliant, ami could say his
wittiest things with the dark eyes ofFlo
rence full upon him—just as well as if
site had beeu a thousand miles off. Oh,
how I envied him his easy, quiet non
chalance, aud how chafed and irritated I
was by the patronizing air he assumed
toward me.
But at last fate gave me a chance to do
Florence a service—to prove to her <that
I was not a coward, though 1 might be
an awkward clodhopper Marley was a
seaeoast town, nud it was to avail himself
of sea-air and-bathing that Mr. Wayne
had removed thither. Almost every line
day he and Florence were down on
Point Pleasant beach —Mr. Wayne bath
ing, and Florence reading and watching
him. The attachment between this fath
er and daughter whs very strong—possi
bly because Mr. Wayne had tried to be
both father and mother to his girl.
Sometimes when T could get sufficient
cmira-e-to do an, I Would.go down* to the
Point and join them, but these occasions
were rare, because I coilld not make sure
that Florence wanted.me todislurb them
often. True, she always smiled, and
made room-for menu the r< ck where she
found a seat, butshedid notsmiie much,
and she hud a way of looking out to sea
which made rao faucy she was dreaming
dreams in whi di I could have no part. —
Stanford was not so particular. He was
down at the Point almost every day
when the Waynes were there, and the
smell of bis cigar and his light laugh
floated landward together on the sea
breeze.
It was in July that the manufacturing
company fn which all my properly was
invested, failed, and left me very nearly
penniless. It was plain that I must go
tonwork, and I was courageous enough to
' be willing to take hold of anything.which
offered. But the times were dull, work*
men plenty, and work scarce, and in
spite of all my efforts, nothing presented
Itself to me to da. I was gloomy and
downhearted for the most part, and
everything looked cheerless and appre
hensive. In this mood, one gray Sep
tember day, I strolled down to the Point.
I had not. expected any one would be
there, but us I turned an angle of the
path, X saw Florence In a water-proof
cloak and hood, in her old seat; and I
• aught out In the surf the gleam of Mr.
Wayne’s red bathing suit; Even as I
gazed, and b fore I bud spoken-to her, a
sharp cry broke from Florence, and I
.saw with dismay that Mr. Wayne had
got beyond his depth, and not being
able to swim, the under tide, which was
very strong at the Point, was .sucking
him under in spite of his determined ef
forts to resist it. In a moment I was
buffeting the waves, and though I am a
strong man and an Oxtra good swimmer
I must confess that more than once I was
on the eve of giving over and letting fate
dispose of both myself and the helpless
Imnlen with which 1 was trying to reach
ihe shore.
But the sight of Florence standing on
le sands, her face as white as death-
her arms extended towards us, gave me
strength, and by and by, more dead than
alive, I succeeded in laying the old man
at his daughter's feet. And I would
have risked my life over and over again
for the u ake of hearing her say again as
she said then.
'William Morton, may Heaven ever
bless you ! You have saved all I have to
love! ;
Paul Stanford was on the spot almost
immediately—very much out of breath
and very profuse in bis protestations of
sympathy. He had witnessed thodanger
of Mr. Wayne from Coluey’s Hill, a
quarter of a mile away, and oame with 1
all haste, but too late be of material as -
sistance He hoped, however, that Miss
Wayne would not refuse him the pleas
ure of supporting her father to their cot
tage. And so by his superior tact and
address he managed 10 secure for him
self what I was dying to ask for, the
privilege of accompanying them home.
But Mr. Wayne remembered with
gratitude the service I had done him.—
Three days afterwards I received a letter
from the President of tiie Shore Lino and
Point Pleasant Kail road, saying that I
could have the situation ol station agent
and signal lender at Buddy's Bridge.—
The salary was a liberal one, considering
the duties to be performed, and I was in
debted for the offer of the situation to Mr.
Wayne, who was a personal friend of the
President.
Of course I accepted the position. I
was in need of employment, nod this
place would pay rho bolter salary than I
could ' hope to earn nowhere else by
manual labor alone. It was n trust of
responsibility, but I prided myselfon my
punctuality and Integrity f and had no
fear In regard to being able to do my
duty. , • 1 ■ i
The management of the switches came
under my supervision, ami also to the or
dering of the ‘draw’ which had been fix
ed in the bridge to allow vessels to puss
through. By day we used bulls as sig
nals—if the draw was open, two green.,
balls were hoisted from the standard a
few.rods below thedraw—if itwasclosed,
and all was right, two red balls signified
that fact to the engineers. By nignt, red
and green lanterns were substituted for
tlie bulls. Bo you will readily understand
that any failure, on the parfof tlie sta
tion-master to attend closely to his duties
might send some passing train todesliuc
tlon iu the twinkling of an eye.
For two months every tiling went like
clock-work. 1 hud an elfieient assistant
in John Stltson, a porter Who had been
employed at the bridge for ten years, and
know all the ‘ropes.’ I saw Florence not
unfrequently—she often went to tlie city
—and al ways came Into the oflice for her
ticket. Once when, the carriage did not
come for her from the cottage, I drove
her home in my own buggy, and had the
of holding her sole hand a mo
ment in mine.ns I lifted hermit.
From the time I took possession of the
railway station, Paul Stanford hud begun
to manifest a aortof friendship.for me. I
had strong suspicions that it was assum
ed, though it seemed real enough. And,
indeed, what particular object hivcould
•hay© in feigning a friendship for me
which lie did not feel, I was at a loss to
imagine. I received his advances with
a coldness which would'have repulsed
most men, but it seemed to have no efleel
on him. He smoked his cigars in my
private room, and read his papers there,
and talked to mo in a genial, of! hand way
—so thoroughly friendly, that at limes I
was ashamed ofmyseifa'id my suspicions.
Thinking it over now. I know that by
‘hook or by crook/ ho managed to worm
out of me all the secrets of myyhusintas
—if indeed they might be callert’aecrets;
but at that time I did not take notice of
his inquiri-s, so gradually were they put.
Meanwhile, I gained the confidence of
the company. I was trusted with large
mu ms ol money, ami was generally well
thought of. Mr. Wayne invited mo to
dine at his house, and.Florenco sung and
played for me, aini I wonjii »j».«.«»
perfectly happy if Stanford had not made
IHb appearance and beguiled- Florence
away from my side-
One dark, loggy night—l remember it
was Friday, ami it was in March—just as
the clock pointed t'' ten (the hour when
the Halidoo express was due), I heard
the whistle of a steamboat, throe sharp
whistles and one long one—a signal that
the draw must be opened. I seized the
green lantern and went out. Stllson was
already there, for lie had been setting the
switches and hanging up the all-night
signal.
‘Ease her down, Stitson/ I said : and
wo.todk the red lantern down and hook
ed on the green one in Its place.
‘lt’s cussed inconvenient having this
steamer come jest at this time/ growled
Stitson; ‘won’t old Giles’—referring to
the driver of the express— 1 won’t he swear
at being stopped?’
He opened the draw, and just as lie did
so, I heard the whistle of the approach
ing train. But there was’no time to no
tice . it—we were .fully occupied - with
getting the steamer through. By some
.mismanagement on board of her, she
fulled, and had to be hacked, which took
up lime, and glancing up, 1 saw with hor
ror.- that InbUMiU of tbejrroou luntorn I
Dud hung at the standard a moment ago,,
the red lantern was Hying out like the
eye of doom !
‘Great Heaven !’ cried Stitson, follow
ing my glance—‘(he red. light is up and
the train will go to ruin, and the com-
pany’ll send us after ’em to-morrow!’ -
Like lightning shot rushed through my
brain the thought of the switch ! If I
could only reach it in time I could send
the train up the steep grade of the wood
track, ana before they readied the et.d of
If, the engineer would be able to stop. J
flew over the rough ground, aiid laid my
hand on the irou rod of the switch. I
had the key-in my. pocket ; I turned it
quickly and flung buck the lover! And
simultaneously a band grasped .my throat,
and a voice I knew well hissed in' my
ear
4 You moan to thwarUmo, but by Hea
ven, I will kill you first!’
I grappled with him, and wo fell to the
ground together. And the fierce thunder
of ‘he on-coming train drowned all sound
and sense ! A hot aulphurious breath of
flame and smoke swept over me. I felt
thegripof my throat relaxing; thenthere
fell a period of comparative al’euee and
coolness, and ever so dimly 1 realized
that the train had run on the woo'd track
and bad stopped.
I put out my hand to touch the head
of Paul Stanford—he who had sought my
fo—but, great Heaven ! there was no
head on his body! My fingers were clot
ted with something warm and sticky ;
uid, overcome hy the terrible revelation
it made to me, I lost consciousness.
When I came to my*slf I was lying on
a settee in the station,'and a great crowd
filled the room. I told my story—hy de
grees—as I could remember it, and I could
see that ray listeners believed it. It was
settled beyond doubt that Stanford had
changed the lights; he bad been seen to
do it by one of the employees on the road,
a stupid fellow, who could not think of
any harm coming from it. His object
was plain enough to me, though I never
spoke of it to an} one. He hated me; lie
was jealous of my growing popularity,
and he wanted to ruin me in the estima-
tion of Lhecompanyand in the estimation
of Florence and her father. But he was
dead, and when I thought of the fearful
manner of his death, 1 forgave him most
freely.
I suppose you have guessed that X mar
ried Florence Wayne, aud I need not tell
you that I was happy.
Pulled the Hair Out of His Head,
—Mr. Charles Henry Muggins detests
cbildren. and particularly smart children.
His detestation of them is so intense, and
he fakes such eccentric methods of mani
festing it, that many of his friends have
exercised their ingenuity iu endeavoring
to ferret out the cuuoe. So have I, ami
behold the result: Mr. Muggins is un
unmarried man, remarkably trim lu his
habits of dress, precise in bis manner of
sneaking, and, I believe, acknowledges to
the age of 30. lam sure that be would
die before be would acknowledge to any
more. He has a luxuriant head of hair,
which ,ho purchased from a celebrated
artiste, and which be loudly imagines
passes with the community us the spon
taneous production of bis own caput. Mr.
Muggins had u lady-love, who resided a
few miles in tlm country; and being de
lained by u furious storm, on one occasion,
at her father's house, over night, he was
obliged to share the bed of her little
brother, a very observing youngster of
six years of age. The next morning, at
breakfast, Muggins, looking and feeling
exceedingly complaisant, little Charlie
remarked, with a knowing air. that lie
would 'never sleep with Mr. Muggins
again, that he wouldn’t! ‘Why not,
Charley ?' asked his sister, in astonish
ment. ’'Because,'answered Young Ameri
ca, ‘when he went 10 bed ho pulled all
the hair out of kin head!* The murder
was out. Here was a pretty situation for
a sensitive man. Muggins has never
Been his charmer since, ami his dislike
for the rising generation isnccountedfor.
What it showed A lady teacher in
a Sunday school recently had occasion to
Illustrate a lesson on faith by the story of
a child who was told by his father 10 drop
from an elevated place into hisaniiH. The
father could not bo seen by tiie child, yet
when commanded, It dropped. Upon the
teacher asking her class what was shown
by this story, a bright little fellow imme
diately replied, ‘Unbowed be bud pluck.*
VOL. 57.—N0. 23
STORY OF A FAiniFP/, IfORSK.
Mnny years ago there livfed on thc.han ks
of the Brandywine, In the Stale of Penn
sylvania, an old Quaker gentleman, who
possessed an old, faithful servant. This
servant was a horse, and his name waa
Charley. Now Charley had trotted be
fore tlnrfamlly chaise for many a long
year, to the vllago post office, to the Sab
bath day meeting, and upon all kinds of
errands. Old Charley waa ever ready to
he ‘hitched upi* Not one trick had ho
shown, nor hail ho once proved unfaith
ful, and grandfather always rod© him
upon such errands of business ns ho might
have about the farm. The river divided
the farm, and it was at limes necessary to
visit the lot on the other side ; there was
a bridge a mile and a half from the house,
but there was a good ford just down by
llie bank, which was always used when
ihe water was not too high. One day in
.the spilng time grandfather had to go
over the river, but the freshet had come,
tlie banks were oveiflowed, and ice in
great cakes and Helds was coining down
with a rush, so ho mounted old Charley
and set off by way of the bridge. Arriv
ing safely on the other side, ho spent
some time in the business which Imd
(nought him over, and it was nearly sun
down when begot ready logo ln-me. He
looked up toward the bridge, said it was
a long three miles around, and that he
believed he would try the lord. “ Old
Charley cun swim," he said, as he rode
down to the bunk of the stream, “and it
is but a short way over.’ * Charley looked
reluctant,'.hut"’alter considerable urging
ho entered the stream. In a moment he
was striking out bravely lor the opposite
slime,, but in another, moment a great
cuke of ice came bounding along, over*
whelming both man and horse. They
both rose, but grandfather had lost his
seal, but as he’waa swept along by the
powerful current,, he caught the drooping*
branch of.a large sycamore tree, and was
soon safe from immediate danger. The
riderless horse pursued hia journey to
wards the bouse, and soon reached, the
shore. Here,, appearing to miss his fa
miliar friend, he looked around, and, as
it seems, discovered his master clinging
to the branch of the tree ; immediately,
and without hesitation, be turnedarouud
and swam boldly tor the tree, and just
beneath the branch lie-stopped, and per
mitred my grandfather 'to get on his lack,
and then, although quite exhausted, lie
started at once for home. The scene had .
hm*n wifHw» fumitu ui..l <
■they got ready with boats and weut to i
meet the nearly famished horse; h» was i
caught by the bridle when ueur the shore, ■
and the old gentleman relieved from his
perilous position.
carrier inni;o\s.
Carrier pigeons, it Is announced, are
now the only means of communication
between Paris and-Tonrs, where the seat
of Government of Franco has been tem
porarily-established. Since the introduc
tion of the electro-magnetic telegraph the
use of earner pigeons has nearly been
discontinued, although this ready means
of conveying secret intelligence is still
employed. They have, however, been
more in the Turkish dominions than in
any other part of the world. The advan
tages to ho derived ,from carrier pigeons
are very limited, as thev cannot be des
patched to their homes except In peculiar
circumstances. Tims carrier pigeons must
he brought from the place to which they
are to return within a short period, not
exceeding two weeks, of their being let
loose, and at a lime when they have
■young In their nests. The bird mu«t also
he kept in the dark, and without food for
fight hours before being released.
The message is written on very thin
paper, and enclosed In an envelope tied
around the body and under Iho wings.
Another inconv 'iiienoe, when (lie jour
ney is for a b*ng distance, arises from the
bird’s alighting hi quest of water, by
which the mes-age may receive Injury
and.lv> obliterated. In order to alleviate
tin* pangs of thirst, it is customary to.
bathe the pigeon’s feet in vinegar,.so ns
to keep them cuoj. The instinct by which
the carrier pigeon is guided has never re
ceived a sufficient explanation, as other
birds possess equal and even greater pow
ers of vision, but cannot he trained to.
carry messages.' When the carrier is let
loose, it rises spirally in the air to a.great
height, and then proceeds to its home at
the rate of thirty miles an hour. The
earner pigeon is of a remarkably large
size, being fifteen inches in length.from
the point of the bill to theend ol the tail.
The naked skin on tlie bill Is very large,
and is covered with red fleshy excrescen
ces; the, eyes aresurmumled with abroad
circle of naked red skin, and the wings
reach nearly t the extremity of the tail.
The carrier pigeons are trained at an early
ago by being at first taken a few miles
from home and then let loose; the dis
tance is gradually increased until the
birds acquire great facility in carrying
mes.-ages. An actual postal system, in
which pigeons were the messengers, was
established • by the Hultan Nonreddin'
Mahmoud, who died in 177 - Tins pig
eon mail Jas'ed eighty-four years,or until
17oS, when it was destroyed by the Mon
gols, who had captured Jiagdad.
Soldiers’ Homesteads —We do not
know whether soldiers are generally
aware of £the fact or not that they are
entitled to homesteads, at a very small
outlay of cash, in the alternate leserved
sections of public lands along Western
railroads. According to an ollicial state
ment from the Commissioner of Public
Lands of the estimated quantity of these
reserved seven sections still undisposed
of, and now subject to entry under the
homestead and pre-emption law, there
are 4,350,000 acres in Minnesota, 1,550,000
acres in Michigan,'soo,ooo acres in lowa,
and 2,050,000 acres in Wisconsin, of which
the West Wisconsin Railroad, from To
mah to Lake St. Croix, is credited With
000,000 acres, and the St. Croix and Lake
Superior Railroads with 550,000 acres.—
Under the Jaw passed last July, every
soldier, or seaman, or oflicer, who has
served ninety days in the Union army, or
navy, is entitled, on payment of a fee of
$lO, and other usual small commissions
to the land nllices, to enter a quarter sec
tion of land, not mineral, of any of the
even numbered sections within the rail
road land grant limits of ten miles on
each side of the line of the road. This
law oilers a chimed'to every soldier who
comes within its provisions, of securing
a homestead of one hundred and sixty
acres of good land, which would coat a
small fortune in any of the Middle States,
for the trifling sum of perhaps $l5 or $2O.
Every soldier who can command that
sum should avail himself of the chance
thus ollered to secure a permanent home.
An Unwklcomb Bhufkli.ow.—A man
in Petersburg, Va.. was recently awaken
ed by a curious sensation about the face,
when ho wasamazed to find his body en
circled l*y a huge black snake, and the
head of the reptile in close proximity to
his mouth. The snake was evidently in
haling the young man’s breath, or was
endeavoring to insert his head into his
mouth, and it was the cold contact with
the face that awakened him. The young
man. terribly frightened, made a desper
ate effort to tree himself, when the snake
unwound itselfatid escaped Shortly be
fore going to sleep, the young man drank
a quantity of milk, and it was supposed
the snake was attracted by its odor in his
breath.
UKAIi AND a
loving wife to her husband,‘will you nev
er learn, my dear, the difference between
real ami exchangeable value?’ The hus
band, tired Of political economists In pet.
llcoats, replied, ‘Ah, yea, my dear, I
know yoni great learning and many vir
tue-. That’s your real -villuo. But 1 know
aUo thut none of my married friends
would change wives with me. That's
your exchangeable value.’
An American traveller says that when
the Kev. Mr. Spurgeon, of Loudon, gets
excited, bo ‘howla like a wilderness.'
Uatca for SUpcrtfsing.
be mscrtcdatTen ecu
por line lor the flrsl Insertion* and flvo cen
porllne for each subsequent Insertion, Quar
o.rly half-yearly, and yearly advertisements In
erted at a liberal redaction on the above rates
Advertisements should bo accompanied'by the
Casr. When sent without any length of time
specified for publication, they will bo contlnned
nntllordercd ont and onarged accordingly.
JOB PMNTINO.
UAHD3, Han Dnti.na.ctnotTi.Ans p and every oth
description of Jon and Gaud Printing.
OirbrjEf anir JSirtus.
Tins Is beautiful autumn weather.
November and December are the em
bers of the year.
Pigs arodooicred the wrong way—they
are killed first and tlren cored,
In Tennessee (lie farmers goad their
tardy oxen with old bayonets.
Punchinello thinks the English mis
sion at present an ‘omission.*
Pleading at the Bar.—Begging for
a drink.
Love is an internal transport. So is a
canal boat.
We are of those who sincerely hope
that the “theatre of war*’ will soon bo
closed for repairs;
A new style of hat feather is said to be
so long that it may bo twisted about the
neck, like a boa. .
Fame Is like a shaved pig with a greas
ed tail, and it is only after it has slipped
through the hands of some thousands,
that some fellow by good luck holds on
to it.
* I see the villain In your face,’ said a
Western judge to an Irish prisoner. ‘May
it please your honor,* replied the prison
er, 'that must he a personal reflection.*
'Bill, you young. scamp, if you had
your duo, you’d get a good whipping. *1
know It, daddy; but bills are not always
paid when duo.’
The United States census reports that
tlier- is n servant maid of 'sweet sixteen*
at Evansville, Indiana, who owns real
estate valued at $50,000.
Josh,Billings says that ‘the lion and
he lamb may possibly snmlirae lay down
n this world together for a fu minutes,
mt when the lions kutna lo git up the
uuh will be mlssen.’
There is no such thing as a menial of
fice when yon put a true man into lt. A B
menial ofliee Is an office with a mean mau "
i it; and it makes fodUlereuco whether
; is a king’s office or a scavenger’s office.
Aunt Susan says
men were in one country, ami ail the wo
men In knottier, with a big river between
them. Good gracious I what ipta of poor
women would be drowrJod.’
A .lawyer in Terre Haute lately went
tors have dug three bullets out of his frame
and say there Is another one that they
can’t find which will probably kill him.,
• Dick pays no compliments to lively
Sail; she says she don’texpocl them from
that quarter; you’re fishing for a compli
ment, my girl.’ ‘No, Dick, not in such
shallow water.’
An ill. matched couple Svere always
quarreling. One day the wife pointed to
a cat and dog that lay together near the
stove, and said; ’Look at them; they
don’t quarrel.' ‘Ah,’ growled the hus
band, ‘tie them together, and see.'
A western merchant is down on the
newspapers. Ho says: ‘Tbur ain’t no
sens in noospuper advertising so long as
a man is'smart enuffto tend to his own
bizniz, and kin stand at the doreand hol
ler the fellers in.’ ’
The editor qf the Greenwich (N, V.)
Journal has a novel way of making the
winter pass oil quickly.. Ho gives a hank
nolo in the full for ninety days; and he
says spring comes as soon as he wants to
see it.
Sir, said a lamllulv to a boarder who
had sent.up his enp for the seventh time,
’Von must be very fond of octree?’ ‘Yes,’
inadamo, I am,’ ho replied ‘or I never
should have drank so much water to got
a little.’ .
A shut up.—A Paris banjeer showed
Demidofl a pin of Malachite, and asked
him whether it was not beautiful. ‘Very,’
said the prince. I have a mantle piece
and a door made of exactly chesame qual
i y.’
Candid.—‘-How much water do you
put in your milk-?’ asked u man ofaboy,
who delivered on one of the milk routes.
*Wo don’t put any watM* in it,’ replied
the boy. ‘What do you put in it then?’
‘lcesaid the candid youth.
• A gentleman advertised in a Charles
ton paper, ihe other day, for three swift
■writers,' The types made it three swift
waiters. Such a crowd of negroes sur
rounded th*» office the next morning that
the editor mistaking their motive, was
about to bundle up and leave by the back
door.
In Massachusetts, recently, a wealthy
bachelor married, off hand, a beautiful
young lady, whom he caught inspecting
cook Moves at theStaio fuir. Since then
you can’t get within forty rods of the
'stove department* for the crowd.of prettv
girls.
Thu following is a contemporary’s de
scription of a Western lynching: ‘ Mr.
Lyon, of lowa, who owned several horses
belonging to other'parties, recently dis
located his vertebra*, while performing
trying feat’s at a rope’seud, for theamuse
ment of a large crowd.’
The ladles of a church in Chicago ad
vertise their third annual hot dinners, at
Metropolitan Hull, continuing through
the week, from 12 to 3 each day.’ When
you cannot have strawberry festivals.why
not get up a taking substitute ?
The parish of Lemlngton, Illinois, was
disturbed Sunday before lust by the non
arrival of the pastor, when the sexton
rose in his seat with awful solemnity and
said : ‘There has been a duplex ar. ival of
the mall.. Our worthy shepherd has two
little lambs added to his dock. Twins
brethren, twins. Let us pray.’ '
Fanny Fern comes to the defence of
old maids in this style : ‘The fact is the
Modern Old Maid is as good as the Mod
ern Young Maid, and a great deal better,
to those who have outgrown bread and
butter.- She has sense aa well as fresh
ness, and' conversation “and repartee as
well as dimples and curves.’
‘1 hope you will be.ablo to support me,’
said a young'lady while walking out one
day with her intended, during a slippery
stale of the pavement, ‘Why, yes,’ said
the somewhat hesitating swain, * with 1
some litt‘e assistance from your father !’
There was some confusion and profound
silence when the lover’s colloquy had
ended.
A ckhtain party from Down East came
to Storm Lake, Wis., the other day, to
view the farm he had purchased having
paid §4.50 per acre forlhe whole of section
10. range, etc. He found that bis farm
was in the very centre of the lake, many
feet under water at thp shallowest point.
He takes no more stock in real, estate In
that immediate vicinity. It is too badly
watered.
A Hkooklyn man is accused of visiting
a restaurant, when Impecunious, and ta
king a seat at the table with a portly
countryman, who was discussing a 26
cent plate of hush. The Brooklynite call
ed for and ate a live dollar dinner, then
gracefully handing a paper he had been
reading to the countryman, dexterously
changed checks with him and went off,
*M v dear Mrs Jones,’ said Mrs. Brown
‘come near to my bedside; lam dying
and I wish to say a few words to you.’ *
‘Yes,inarm, * sighed Mrs. Jones. ‘Well
Mrs. Junes,’ ejaculated Mrs. Brown,
‘you and I have had a good many tifla in
our day, and now I part with you in
peace; can you forgive me?' *Yea
inarm,’ sighed Mrs. Jones; Jindeed, in
deed lean!’ ‘Am I forgiven ejac ulat
ed Mis. Drown. ‘Yes maim,' respo ndod
Mis. Jones with difficulty, in i ,*onso
quence of the intensity of her un* gulsli;
and then she attempted to weep b er * ay
out of the dying woman's room. . Stop
a moment, my dear Mrs. Jones,* e ald the
expiring Mrs. Brown, ‘l've another
word to say. I wish to have ' under
stood that If I get well everyth goes
back, aiid we stand op the BR mO old
ground.!
‘Suppose all the