BRISBANE THIS WEEK Hear the Noble Lord He Sees a New Germany + A Must for the U. S. A. Strength Alone Protects An association called “The Anglo- German Fellowship,” a name which shows that men forget wars as easily as they do seasickness, gave a dinner in Lon- don in honor of the Duke and Duchess of Brunswick, who are Germans, as was the British royal family orig- inally. Among other dinner, Lord Lothian talked Arthur Brisbane about war, is strong enough to fight back. to deal with the same dissatisfied populations when they are fully armed. The British made that discovery for themselves long ago, before Lord Lothian was born, in the process of building up their great empire. If the Boers, Hindus, Zu- lus and some others had been as thoroughly armed as they were thoroughly dissatisfied, the British empire would be smaller. Americans who want to know what Europeans, including the Eng- lish, are thinking and planning, will be interested in the following state- ment by Lord Lothian concerning Germany. It has been suggested pacify Germany by giving back some of the colonial properties tak- en from Germany at the end of the war, Lord Lothian is one of the numerous Englishmen who do not believe in “giving things back.” Said he: the problem can be solved along the lines of the restoration to Germany of the old German colonies. would not solve Germany's difficul- ties, and things have changed since 1914. The question must be con- sidered on much wider lines. the colonial nations must be willing to make their contribution to a transfer of territory. The new world as well as the old must be willing once more to reopen its doors to trade and migration.” The statement of the noble lord old Must be willing,” etc., has no pleasant sound in American ears. The word ‘“‘must,” especially, is one that a wise Englishman could hardly apply to the United States after 1776. Lord Lothian probably meant that the United States “ought,” not that it “MUST.” once more reopen its doors to trade and migration. The United States, it more of the immigration that made rope, and it needs many millions more of the same kind. It also American wages and American work in the United States. There is nothing like being strong and prepared for trouble. tice how differently Germany ap- pears in the eyes of France and other nations surrounding her to- after the war. ou that subject: “Germany now has both equality and strength. Reparations have gone. Part V of the Treaty of Ver- natural right to self-defense is ac- cepted without further discussion the better. then presents the results as a kind of ultimatum to Germany-—the sys- tem represented by the recent questionnaire—and to substitute for it free and equal and frank discus. sion around a table. The old sys- tem is not equality, either for Ger- many or for ourselves.” What telephone girl in America fias the softest, most beautiful, most easily understood voice? That ques- tion was asked in England and a Miss Cain won the competition ar- ranged by the British postoffice, which owns British telephones and telegraph. The finest voice having been selected, a robot was manufac- Jared 0 imitate Hat voice by sot. a , Now, w you . the time in Lordon, “Pim” and the soft woice Miss Cain, periectly reproduced : ““At the third stroke it four twenty-seven and fil ’ “The Joke That Wasn't Funny” By FLOYD GIBBONS Famous Headline Hunter YSU know, boys and girls, I don’t suppose anybody exactly rel- ishes the idea of death for any reason, but you can't get around the fact that some reasons for dying are more pleasant than others. The long list of the world’s martyrs seems to suggest that death isn’t quite so terrible when you're dying for a good and worthy cause. But on the other hand, it must be pretty awful to be facing your doom on account of nothing more important than a practical joke. That's what happened, though, to Charley Di Giacomo, of Paterson, N. J., on March 8, 1923, at the Peoples Bank in Paterson. Death came for him riding on the butterfly wings of a laugh—came for him at his place of business, just as he was getting ready to leave for the night. It happened so suddenly realize what had happened. { i up, Charlie, or I'll lock you in.” Then he heard the door click shut. It was seconds before he realized that that ominous click meant death Bill's Thoughtless Gag Threatens to Smother Charley. Bill hadn't meant to shut that decor. meant to close it part way. had slipped from his hands. Too late he realized he had shut the door the next morning! Bill called Garret Kuiken, the assistant cashier, who was still in the bank. Kuiken called the fire department, and the firemen called out half of Paterson. They got crews from the electric light company, crews of structural iron workers and concrete workers. They sent for an ambulance for they knew Charley Di Giacomo would need it before they got him out. Then they set to work with drills trying to punch a hole through the side of the vault, 1928-B So you like this number! Lovely, isn't it? Boasting the very newest in sleeves and smart styling, it is just the frock to frantically, bu: their labors were futile. people out of it, but it isn't an easy thing to GET people out of. And “Hurry Up, Charley, Or I'll Lock You In.” wardrobe for weeks and months ahead. What's more, you can quickly and inexpen- sively. Note the choice of short or long the paneled front, sign and a simplicity of line which of a printed a state of collapse, tormented by the thought that his joke had caused the death of his friend Charley. It Looked as if the Vault Would Be Charley's Tomb, Again the drills began clattering at the top of the vault, live until they could get him out? That's something Charley didn't know himself. When that door had closed on him it had taken him a few “When I remembered that the door couldn't be opened till the next morning,” he says, “I was stunned—for how long 1 cannot say. Everything was quiet. I could hear the thumping of my heart, 1 felt alone and helpless like a man buried a thousand miles under ground. I pulled myself together. I knew I must keep calm.” into play on the top of the vault. After an hour's work they succeeded in drilling a small hole in the top of the vault. Would Charley still be The president of the bank “Are you all right, boy?" up through the opening. On it was scrawled one word, “Hurry!” There Wasn't Any Air Left for Charley to Breathe. “At first 1 could breathe, but I knew that the air wouldn't last long. “The place seemed to be getting hot. Breathing began to be harder. I broke out in a cold sweat and got down on the floor where the air was better. For hours I lay there, gasping for breath. My body was feverish. I began to pray that they would be in time.” Charley's lungs were aching. He was burning up inside. went on breathing became almost impossible. felt cool, and he thought he would go mad. The Cost of Humor Is Pretty High, Sometimes. I struggled to a chair, stood on it and pushed a note through. It took them five hours to open a breash in that two-foot-thick wall of battleship steel. Charley's face was blue, his eyes and kis tongue hanging out of his mouth when, at last, they got him out into the air. His hearing was gone and he =till can’t hear as well as he once could. For weeks he lay in bed recovering from the shock. The doc- indoor work for many years. It's a pretty tough price to pay—for an- other guy's sense of humor. © WNU Service, Snakeroot Poisons Animals Veterinarians say white snake- root causes a disease among cattle, horses, and sheep commonly called “trembles.” It seems to affect the nervous system. The poisoning is sometimes contracted by human beings from drinking milk or eat- ing milk products from poisohed Discovery of the Tomato It is not definitely known just when the tomato was found to be non-poisonous and edible or how the discovery came about, says Pathfinder Magazine. But tradi- Jon has it hath was a New Eng- man w te the and dire pr faction. Make it yourself, sending today for Barbara Bell Pattern No. 1928-B designed for sizes 14, 16, 18, 20, 32, 34, 36, 38, 40 and 42. Size 16 requires just 4 yards of 30- inch fabric, with short sleeves. Send 15 cents in.coins, Send for the Fall Pattern Book containing 100 Barbara Bell well- planned, easy-to-make patterns. Exclusive fashions for children, young women and matrons, Send 15 cents for your copy. Send your order to The Sew- ing Circle Pattern Dept., 247 W. Forty-third St., New York, N.Y. © Bell Syndicate. —WNXNU Service, (Towelold ® \® Questions To prevent the juice in fruit tart boiling over, mix a little corn- starch with the sugar before add- ing it to tart filling. . - - Green bananas may be ripened by placing in a paper bag and keeping in a dark closet for a few days. * * . When having oak floors laid, have flooring delivered at the house a number of days before work is to be done. Open bales so that dry air can get to the strips to reduce any moisture content, . - . Aluminum pots and pans that have become discolored may be brightened by rubbing with a cloth moistened with lemon juice. . - » from press This care- shak- ing it in the steam from a briskly boiling tea kettle until it is thor- oughly damp. * To remove water silk, dampen evenly and material while still damp. may be done by spoaging spots When making cole slaw, or cab- bage salad, add half a small onion, shredded fine and mix with the cabbage. It improves | the flavor. © Associated Newspapers — WN Service Apres nous le deluge. (F.) Aft. er us the deluge (attributed to Madame de Pompadour, in refer- ence to signs of an approaching revolution). Bordereaux. (F.) note; a memorandum Chef-d'oeuvre. (F.) piece, De nihilo nihil fit. (L.) Nothing comes from nothing. Mens sana in corpore sano. (L.) A sound mind in a sound body. Ippissima verba (L.) The very words, In hoc signo vinces. this sign thou wilt conquer. to of Constantine.) 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Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers