BE SON
——
RS a
CLEVER SELLING
—f can opener, a pan lifter and tack
puller, all in one.
husband to pull some tacks, while 1
lift the pans on the stove?
Clerk—Very easy. All you have tc
do Is to buy three—senything else?
Good Hardware,
The Reason
A bored woman from London was
walking in a friend's garden. Feeling
she ought to say something, she re-
marked :
“These bluebells look just like holly-
hocks.”
“That's probably because they are
wallflowers,” answered
Tit-Bits.
NO STUDENT
“He's no student you say?
*No—Just attends college.”
Pride Before the Fall
Pride lifts us up to realms above;
Nor does the thought enthrall
That when a fellow falls in love
Pride goes before the fall
Wasn't Ambitions
“How high are we now?’ asked the
timid cirplane passenger.
“About four thousand feet,” sald
the pilot. “I haven't started to climb
yet.”
“lI don't know whether I mentioned
it before we started,” quavered the
passenger, “but I'm not at all am-
bitious.”
“Have you a court yard?”
“No, I do my courting indoors”
Hard World
The suto in the lowground
The flying machine on high,
On the way to heaven or hades,
How can a world got by?
Something & to Hope For
One member of a fishing party was
an Irishman who discgreed very badly
with the sea.
“It's all right, old man”
other member of the party;
not dead yet.”
“True,” moaned the sufferer, “but
sald an-
“you're
alive.”
Perfect Patience
Marion—Are they In love?
Frances—They must be; she lis
tens to his description of a ball game,
i
Tue Futone Inventor
Of WAR MACHINES 34
SOMETHING TO
THINK ABOUT
By F. A. WALKER
THE POOR MILLIONAIRE
MAN with
the other day.
He was far from
wealth, and with all his riches
from being happy.
“My life was never destined to be
quite hsppy. It was lald along lines
I could not foresee. It left nothing to
hope for, with nothing to
strive for.
handicap to happiness. It
death to ambition.”
If you read Plutarch’'s wri
everybody should read them,
wonld be Interested In
Alexander the Great,
of Phillp of Macedon.
told of the great suc
was having in a war, of
fought many. “My father
me nothing to do”
Bat when he arrived at
gan his own undertakings
outstripphd his father's
overshadow him
the
will
he so
accomplish
That possibility rests In
of every young man
great wealth. But the
men's sons are not
who
Alexanders
are willl to spend
earn. To distr
To tear down
But
bute but not to collect.
but not to bulld up.
the son
g to do, If he
thing.
struct.
It Is a great advantage to the poor
have an outlet for his ambi
but to build, to create, to con
tion.
It is a splendid
flelds
thing that he has
the exercise
It Is greatly to his bene-
has to struggle to get on.
that you do not exercise
hecome useless,
An imagination that Isn't working,
dies of Inactivity,
‘he poor boy
sand
for
Muscles
can imagine a thon
things that the rich boy will
about. His view
nding wealth.
The poor boy can work, and work
is the greatest blessing in this life,
No man Intent on his work, Interested
in the resnits, is ever long mnhappy.
If you have health, ambition and
persistence you have all that Is neces.
i
i
i
she says Gencrivns a new dress.
\ ”
4
In a Leipzig theater is a notice:
theater.”
Underneath this someone has writ-
ten: “8S. P. C. A."—Munich Simpils-
simus,
“Henry.”
“Yes, dear.”
“Get up from that hammock. This
fs a holiday and I want you to go
out and have a good time.”
The Ship Rail Habit
“Sue Slibersheet goes to Europe
frequently, doesn’t she?”
“Does she! She's returned so often
that every time she sees a banister
she erawls up on it and begins to look
around for the photographer,” New
Orleans Times-Plcayune.
A Fast Pace
Wife-—George, dear, are there any
fashions In that paper?
Oeorge—Yes, but they're out of
date—it's the morning paper.
————— ———
i
ever attained. Never mind about the
money. That will come In due time.
(@® by MeC
lure Newspaper Hyndicate)
mmmilll fine
GRLIGAG? |
(cormionT)
“When a fellow tells me I am get-
ting more beautiful,” says Cynical Sue,
“1 wonder if he means I am getting
thick-skinned.”
wisi
Ban on Fortune Telling
Under strict orders from Signor
Mussolinl fortune tellers and fortune
telling cards heave been banned
HE YOUNG LADY
ACROSS THE WAY
The young neross the
the scientists
lady
have
WHY BAYS
discovered dino
10,000. (00) years ago
the
dino
and she wonders how
creature compared with the
saur of the present day
(® by MeClure Newspaper Syrodicale)
HERE are no secrets hetween
my wife and me,” boasted the
House Detective.
“That's tough, Kelly,”
the Hotel Stenographer.
mighty tough on somebedy.
“Either you are not very nice peo
ple or you never have any fun in your
lives. If yon were both so slow that
you never did anything before you
you ®lid not want
to tell, you certainly must have led
a mighty bum existence. No kisses
in the back of a taxi, no sly hug on
a straw ride, ne holding of hands In
the ‘movies,’ must have been a mighty
stale life.
“If you both did all the things
which normal humans do and told
each other all about it after you got
married, you were a mighty poor pair
of sports, and it was tough on the
people with whom you did these
things.
“When 1 get married, Kelly, 1 shall
either keep my mouth shut to my
man about what I did before 1 met
him or else lie to him like a lady. It
can't be any fun for a man who loves
a woman to hear the detalls of the
other man who kissed his wife before
he came on the scene, So If he is
fool enough to Insist on her telling
him. there is only one thing for her
to do as a good and dutiful wife who
wants to make her husband happy,
and that Is to do what you and your
wife did, lle to each other,
“Even so, Kelly, it Is hard for a
woman to tell a man she never had
a sweetheart till
answered
“That's
he alone kept her from being an old
till some time when yoti get mad at
him and then tell him the truth just
to take him down a peg like your
wife will do to you some day.”
(®. by the MeNaught Syndieabs, Ine)
Pissing
Watermelon Is African
The watermelon ls a native of Af
rica. It was early taken to India, as
seems indicated by its having a San.
skrit name. It reached China about
the Tenth century A. D. It has no
name in the ancient Greek and Latin
ianguages and was probably not
known to these peoples much before
the Christian era,
Wanted: —A
Freckled Boy
By DOUGLAS MALLOCH
ERHAPS it's my
But where
gone?
mind
freckles
mistaken
have all the
who has freckles on.
nose
A youngster
you sometimes see a
I suppose,
I mean Is freckles here,
n to brow, and ear to ear.
seven,
But what
Now, what 1s (as 13 often sald)
Worth doing is worth doing well!
And freckles should be freely spread
Around the face, I'm heré to tell,
If you possess a freckled face,
Then it faeckled ev'ry place,
So not a soul can doubt a lot
If it's a freckled face or not.
hay e
There never was a freckled lad
That other people didn't like,
Another thing: he always had
A name like Jimmy, Bill or Mike,
You never saw an Algernon
With very many frecl
Or someone freckled who
A Percival or Archibald
cles on,
was called
t branch,
1 kid
But somehow,
You always
The
He said
A freckl
on the topmos
found the
on the
he'd ride, did.
could climb And run
freckled fun
And catch more sunfish from a dock
the cherubs in the block.
freckled
roughest pony ranch
and ride he
ed boy
know (perhaps you do,)
The sort of youngster that 1 meant,
bank, a rallroad,
Both looking for a president,
Of course, if Freckles they employ,
They'll start him in as office boy.
But he'll be president in time-
For freckled kids can always climb,
(& by Mol leate)
too,
sewspaper Bynd
er JN WSE——
HS Cook Bos Book
Cerri
When we look into
of the futur nd see
for each of to do, we realize,
all, what a beaut
work and live and be
son.
the long avenu
wd there In
after
iful thing it is t
happy. —Bleven-
the Ki
CABBAGE WAYS
gions
ABBAGE, like onions, is not fa-
because of its odor when
but it is a wh vege.
both raw and co
vored
cooked, olesome
table oked and con
neral salts needed |
the biood
Tt naln reason we tire of different
2 at they are
the same Ways
and a little
common vege
ve ss is th
frequently in
of serving
served so
If =»
change more
ing
cooking. these
care in
tables would be more welcome,
cooked wit
served ina white sauce Is a very wood
way.
Cabbage h one onion and
Swedish Cabbage.
Poll In
dozen
salted water for XA
good - sized fresh
Drain them and fil
ng mixture: A pound of
chopped fin egg.
fuls of cream, one-half teaspoonful
white pepper, one
e, one two tab! lespDoon
teaspoonful of salt,
one of chopped parsieg Rub the
with the cut side of-a clove of garlic
Mix thoroughly and leaf
around a tablespoon uf af the mixture;
trim the ends neatly and tie or skew
er. Lay in a dripping pan with a pint
of stock or butter and water. Baste
frequently, and bake for half an hour,
or until Remove the rolls,
thicken with the gravy and pour over
the cabbage.
dish
roll. each
tender
Stuffed Catthage.
Remove the stalk from a hard head
of cabbage, tie in a cloth and cook un-
Scoop out a cavity from
the stem-end and fill with a stuffing of
and butter. Bake in a hot oven until
the cabbage Is brown,
Hot Slaw.
Shred a head of cabbage and pour
over the lowing dressing: Beat two
egr yolks, add two tablegpoonfuls of
water, a disk of salt a tablespoonful of
butter, and a cupful of mild vinegar.
Cook this dressing over hot water and
pour over the shredded cabbage while
hot. Heat the cabbage and serve hot,
German Cabbage.
cold water,
of sugar and cook five minutes.
Escalioped Cabbage.
white sauce In a baking dish and
sprinkle each with a light layer of
snappy cheese. Bake until the but
tered crumbs covering the top are
brown, then serve at once.
(@ 1028, Wettarn NeWupnpye Union.)
———
Standard of Manhood
Man comes to himself only when he
has found the best that Is in him and
has satisfied his heart with the high
est achievement of which he is capa
ble. That alone to him is the real
moasure of himself, the real standard
of his manhood.—Qrit.
“DANDELION BUTTER COLOR”
color
Drug
butter
Years,
well
~-Adv,
A harmless vegetable
used by millions for 50
gtores and general stores
of “Dandelion” for 85 cents.
Watt’s Figure Too Low!
James Watt,
said that six pounds per
wis the maximum safe
boilers, That before he
1810, Today
the average In the
that run most electric generating sta
tions where a klowatt-hour of current
1¥roduced for each 114 pounds of
but eng xperimenting
“discoverer”
square inch
pressure
wns
450 pounds
great steam boilers
coal, neers mre i
m running up to 3,200 pounds
times
with stea
more than H00
IHmit set by Watt,
the pressure
applied at night upen
strengthen eycs
Adv,
Roman Eye Balsam,
retiring, will freshen and
oy morning. 372 Pearl Bt, N. Y,
————
Natural Mistake
Mayhelle—Here's a photograph that
sent by radlo, It's a picture Of
myself,
Glenda
state,
was
Oh, 1 thought It was
Today's Big Offer to Al
Who Have Stomach
Agony
Read About This Genetgus Money Back
Guarantee
When you have any trouble with your
stomach such as gas, heaviness and
distention, why fool with things which
at best can only give relief.
Why not get a medicine that wil
build up your upset, disordered stom-
ach and make it so "strong and vigor
ous that it will do its work without |
any help.
Such a medicine is Dare's Mentha
Pepsin, a delightful elixir that is sold
by your local dealer and druggists
everywhere with the distinct under
standing that if it doesn’t greatly help
you your money will be gladly returned.
It has helped thousands—it will no
doubt help you.
Good Artificial Milk
DEMAND “BAYER” ASPIRIN
Take Tablets Without Fear If You
See the Safety “Bayer Cross.”
Unless you see the name
ige or on tab
Warnin Wg!
“Bayer” on packs
are not getting
Aspirin proved sa
presc pi
Say “Bayer”
Imitations
#8 You
the ger » Bayer
ons and
shysiclans for
ribed by
when you buy Aspirin,
ay prove dangerous.~—Adv.
Rare Bird Specimens
Despite all th arch made
interest
gmnong
and other countries
the irfous museums
A Lady of Distinction
Ig recognized by the delicate, fascinat-
ing influence of the perfume she uses,
A bath with Cuticura Soap and hot
water to thoroughty cleanse the pores
followed by a dusting with Caticuora
Taleum powder usually means a clear,
sweet, healthy skin —Advertisement.
Those Dear Girls
Madge-—Are going to
the poor fellow’s ring?
Marie (who has just broken her en-
gagement)-I haven't decided, 1 sup-
pose he'll propose to you now,
thought I'd just hand it
to save the bother,
you
Everybody wants to hosts somebody
and there Is always somebody who
wants to boss everybody.
i
WOMEN, BE WELL!
“While bringing up my family 1 de-
veloped a x rundown and weak-
ened state of health,
1 could scarcely do
my housework. [|
doctored but did not
seem to gain in
health until 1 took
Dr. Pierce's Favor-
ite Prescription. I
y found that it not
only strengthend me
but it relieved me
of backaches and
other pains. 1 have
been in such good
that 1 have no hesi-
tancy in recommnding Dr. Pierce's
Favorite Prescription.” Mrs. Wm
Pope, 248 Walnut St, Trenton, N. J.
Liquid or tablets.
Send 10c to Dr. Pierce's in Buffalo,
N. Y., for trial pkg tablets and write
for free advice.
health ever since
Have
a
lovely
(omplexion
You ean make and keep your complex
fon as lovely as a young girl's by giving a
little attention to your blood. Remember,
8 good complexion lsn’'t skin deep — it's
health deep.
Physicians agree that sulphur is one of
the most effective blood purifiers known
to science. Hancock Sulphur Compound
is an oid, reliable, scientific remedy. that
purges the blood of impurities. Taken
internally — a few drops in a glass of
water, it gets at the root of the trouble,
As a lotion, it soothes and heals,
6c and $1.20 the bottle at your drug-
giat's. If be can’t supply you, send his
name and the prices in stamps and we
will send you a bottle direct,
Haxcock Liquid SurLrsvr COMPANY
Baltimore, Maryland
Banocock Swiphwr Compound Owmtment — 808
and 60¢ — for ues with
Hancock
Sulphur Compound
Good Indication
Alice likes me?”
folks are you
2 1
thins
knocking
SAAC
{ Loosen Up That Cold
With Musterole
Have Musterole handy when a cold
starts. It has all of the ad ivantages of
grandmother's mustard plaster without
the burn. You feel a warm tingle as the
healing ointment penetrates the pores,
then a soothing, cooling sensation
quick relief {.
Made of pure oil of mustard and
other simple ingredients, Musterole is
recommended by many nurses
doctors. Try Musterole for bronchitis,
sore throat, suff neck, pleurisy, rheu-
matism, lumbago, croup, asthma, neu-
ralgia, congestion, pains and aches of
the back or Joints, sore muscles, sprains,
bruises, chilblains, frosted feet, colds of
the chest. It may prevent pneumonia
and “flu.”
Tr
If there is any r pig mn a man’s na-
ture it Is sure to crop out when be
travels,
The happine gs of the wicked passes
away like* a torrent.—Racine.
MOTHER Fletcller” s
"Castoria is especially pre-
pared to relieve Infants in
arms and Children all ages of