FLASHES OF FUN, The Two Clagses.—"l see that Tim. mins is getting out another novel” “Historical or hysterical ¥"-—Indianap- olis Journal, Military Compliment.—Lieutenant- “Good evening, Miss, You look like a regiment of rosebuds to-night.” — Flie- gende Blatter, “They say all the necessaries of life are very dear in the Klondike.” “Not at all. Ice is so cheap they can't give It away.”"—Puck. Photographer--“Now, try to look like yourself.” (Noting the effect) Well er, h—m; try to look like somebody else.” Harlem Life, Johnny-—“Papa, what is a Papa-—*It is a term used that section of the party to whic do not belong.” Puck. faction?’ to describe you Friend —"This scems to be an comfort- able flat” Harlemite— It makes that impression on everybody who doesn't live in it."— Puck. Elderly (sentimentn “Yes, my eternal.” does, It Coquette dear Mr, Assessor (frightened) percelve.”-—Fliegende Blatter, “Experience,” sald Uncle Eben, “is er gpod teacher; but education is li'ble ter be wasted on er man dat don’ "pen on nuffin’ else.”--Washington Star. Executive—“l would appoint man, but he's too Ignorant for the vo lice force.” Heeler—“Den put him on the school board.”"—New York Herald. “Does my whistling disturb you?” “Oh, not in the least. I'm used ing men whistle, I'm a collector millinery house. Yonkers Statesm: How It May Be. alike, and what suits please another.” “I guess that's 1 What Is one man's bicyele is an man's juggernaut.” Puck. said the zephyr, 1y) Assessor, love is “So I your to hear for.a “People are one nay “1 hear,” have been raging through the “Never was a worse blizzard. “I cool.” —Tndianapolis Journal. west, howled the was He (looking out at the window so bright and cheerful ¢old and gloomy without.” “Without He “Why, you, dearest.”—Chicago News within and what?" wi “Marriage” Girl, ald the “Is a lottery.” said “that the man chances.” —Indlanapolis Jour He Filled in Hi “What Tramp trate—"And on “Then 1 t Husband The baby wheel” is,” the [Pessimi takes most How trate week 7 ake a day off “Maria, house is on Im Wife Husband “Oh gd that out first 5 - t ¥ y pect that your | vomen., waerever ne gu My husband is a Ma The cheap meal is simply Where's the “He's out Record ttor Ww restaurant Qe Proj rietor “Here, vile, [I wor proprietor ? at lunch, sir.” cc No Difference. i {alike nature different those wi Pres. McKinley Va, Free Eilver A battle { Ir Summer not in talk or new potato nam and he offers ¢ ice for the bigg ] alsc $400 in gold for suftable nam for his eorn (17 inches long) and oad prodi- gies. Ouly seedsmen in America growing grasses, clovers and farm seods nnd ing potatoes at £1.50 a barrel, The editor urges you to try 3aler's seeds, and to BEND Tris Novice with 10 Crs, 1% STAMrs to John A. Salzer Seed (po , La Crosse. Wis for 11 new farm soed samples, worth £10.00. to got a start, and their big catalogue. ba vi IN yield wr ACH We inherit nothing truly, but what our actions make us worthy of, FREE! Inventor's Patent Guide. Any I Hug Store or O'Mara Co-op, Pat.OMee, Wash « 1A Accuracy is the twin brother of honesty, inaccuracy, of dishonesty, In cold weatlier We need heat, The blood must be Warm, rich and pure, Hood's Barsaparilla Keepe the blood In perfect order, Sending it, in 2 Nourishing sireash, To every organ. A Sl St: HOS 530 WEEKLY SERMONS Rev, Dr. Talmage Preaches on the Evils of Clubs, The Ninth of the New York Herald's Com. petitive Sermons Is Entitled “San- | shine, But a @loud; a Cloud, But Sun- shine"wDr, Talmage on Clab Evils, " Text: “He was a mighty man in valor, but he was a leper.” —II Kings v., 1. Over every human life, however bright the sunshime, a cloud may come, Every person covets what he chooses to consider success; some riches, some fame, some pleasure, somes domestio felleity. No one, however, realizes all his ambitions—In- deed, not all are worth realizing. There is always a something which mars happiness possibilities of anguish in every condition, spots weaker than others in the strongest bar of steel, the capability of the purest gold, spots on the sun. son's weak nesses A per- consequently his sogroes of suffering—may lie just beside his strong ost traits of character. He may be honest but overexacting; strong-willed, but obsti nate; economical, but unmereiful; o« arageous, but censorious: affectionate, but passionate, Unselfishness may sharpen daggers that pierce the heart, and intensity of affection may be a pledge of keenest pangs, A person, it may be, acquires riches, but taken departure, or flooding the soul. ful along some lines, is consplenonsly unsuccessful along others, It takes but little to render a person miserable: it takes much to render some happy, only a trifle to prevent wealth from pro- ducing contentment, is it a mark of wis dom to sacrifice for its acquisition whichis of more ua-—haglth reputation, eharacter, selonce waters of grief he principle, eon. man’s life consisteth not Gf the things he Does the | river consist in the driftwood it is carrying tothe ocean? *‘Fine feathers birds,” but a fine residence fquipage are not capable o the heart Of thoss who covet f prize; but cares osgesseth and a fins merry. ime. some win ineroase, resp ibiiit ies augment, rows of pumarous er and Hoe w nirts a flekle dames) | fled to bestow happiness | nes ~ lemn gre wiao between } in twain the emptiness y read the | compensa { hearing rauch tha { The blind ran see no { Is excused from rann | #on who cannot read is i temptation to read the the 8 | ter the most ¥ Thorn trial and the prise n walls over erim cLus Lessons Drawn by Talmage, Text: “Let play before us Thers are tf ¥ 0 i pool of | on their bands of sword-fencing healthful and inn » | Accepts the challenge twelve men, the ag opens, But some thing went adversely. Perhaps one of the swordsmen got an unlucky elip, or in some way hind his ire aroused. and that which opened in sportfulness sanded in violence, #ach one taking his contestant by the hair, and then with the sword thrusting him in the side; so that which opened in innocent fun ended in the massacre of all the twen- ty-four sportsmen. Was there ever a bet. ter illustration of what was true then, and Is true now, that that which is innocent way be made destructive? At this season’of the year the club-hiouses “of our towns. and cities are in {gil play, I have found out that there is a logitimate and an illegitimate use of the elub-housge, In the one case it neay become a healthful recreation, like the contest of the tweniy- four men in the text when they began their play; in the other case it becomes the mas. sacrs of body, mind and soul, as in the case of these contestants of the text when they had gone too tar with their gport. All in- telligont ages have had their #ntherings for political, social, artistie, Statnry pur- 'y Giboeon, { 1 ih ¥ poses 5 game eovld be more . p her army Fwelve men against ses—gatherings oharacterized the phat old Adglo-Saxon designation of ‘elub.” ‘ During the day they are comparatively Ina places. Here and there an aged may resfling a newspaper, or an employe dost. ing asofa, or a clerk writing up the ae- counts; but when the surtain of the night falls on the natural day, then the our. tain of the club-house hoists for the enter. tainment, us hasten up, now, the marble stairs, What an imperial hallway! On this side there are reading-rooms, where you find ali newspapers and maga. zines. Or that side there is a library, where you find all books, from herme. neutics to the fairy tale. Coming in and out there are men, some of whom stay ten minutes, others stay many hours, Some of these are from luxurious homes, and they [have exoused themselves for a while from i the domestie cirels that they may enjoy | the larger sociability of the slub-house. These are from dismembered households, and they have a piain lodging somewhere, but they come to this club.-room to have thelr chiet onjoyment. One blackball amid ten votes will defeat a man's hecom- ing & momber, For rowdylsm, for drunk- enness, for gambling, for any kind of misdemeanor, a membor {s dropped out, Brilliant elub-house from top to bottom. The chandeliers, the plate, the furniture, the companionship, the literature, tho social prestige, a complete enchantment, But the evening Is passing on, and so we hasten through the hall and down the steps and into the street, and from blook to hloek yntil we come to another style of eclub-house, Opening the door, we find the fumes of strong drink and tobareo, some- thing almost intolerable. These young men at this table, it is easy to understand what they are at, from the flushed cheek, the intent look, the almost angry way of | tossing the dice, or of moving the “ehips.” | They are gambling. At another table are i meu who are telling vile stories, They are three-fourths intoxicated, and between 12 jand 1 o'clock they will go staggering, | hooting, swearing, shouting on their way | home As the hours of the night go away, the | conversations becomes imbeoile and more | debasing. Now it is time to shut up. Those i who are able to stand will get out on the { pavement and balances themselves against | the lamppost, or against the rallings of the { fencs, The young man who is not able to stand will have a bed improvised for him {in the elubhouse, or two not quite so overcome with liquor will conduct him to his father's house, and they will ring the { door bell, and the door will open, and the | two imbeoile escorts will rhs into the hallway the ghastllest and most hellish spectacle that ever enters a front door—a drunken son But I make a vast difference between clubs, I have belonged to four clubs: A | theologieal elub, a ball club, and two liter ary clubs, 1got from them physical reju { venation and moral heal | the principle? It God will help me, T will | lay down three principles by which you may judge whether the club where von are n member, orthe club to which you been {nvited, ia a legitimate or ate clubhousn its Influences on home, if vou I have been told by a prom 1 elub life that three-fourths of the great clubs of vd men, That wifes noe over her h v 3} an asanuit Es srt great ent nent ¢ 3 fo i benafleenon y ir ‘ unded elevated: fife t 16 great nn [ this ALY unchristian, the prayers before oti threads o " AW ia thread them together {1 take a thread of in your house, a thread i aat preceded and athread of the that followed, and a thread of the beaut led out at eventide to greet you, and then a thread of the beautiful dress in which you laid her away for the resurree. sion. together and I have another strand. Then Itake a thread of the searlst robe of the suffering Christ, and a thread of the white raiment of your loved ones before the throne, and a string of the harp cherubic and a string of the harp seraphic, snd I twist them all together and I have a third strand. “Oh!” you say, “either strand is strong enough to hold fast a world.” No. I will take these strands and I will twist them together, and ons end of that rope I will fasten, not to the Communion table, for it gh sll be removed-—not to the plilar of the organ; wind it ‘round and ‘round the eross of a sympathizing Christ, and, having fastened one end of the rope to the cross, I throw the other end to you. Lay hold of iti Pull for your life! Pall for heaven! TRADING STAMPS LEGAL. Law Against Them In California Declared Unconstitutional. The law prohibiting merchants from making gifts as an inducement to trade, which was primarily aimed at trading stamp enterprises, has received a knosksut blow by Judge Campbell, of 8an Franeisco, Cal, who decided the law to be unconstitu- tional, as an unwarranted invasion of the liberties of the citizen. The decision affects a number of Eastern companies which bave recently commenced operations there, - Afriean Princess in Baltimore. “w.__ Baltimore is entertaining Her Roys Highness Princess Nellie Zo-Settlemeyer eldest daughter of King George, of the Iahs, sn powerful tribe on the west const o rica, The is ored Normal RL Ih | OH SAA THE KRYSTONE STATE Items of Interest from Over the State, THE BRIDE ARRESTED, It is Suid Mes, Crosby Has Two Other Husbands Heading Traction Employes To Be Protected Agalust Attack North. smpton’'s Election the County Other State News, As the outcome of a wadding at the sonnage of Rev, B, It Reading, I ar Lwelzig, HOY foliow, Syl said The contracting parties were It Is husbands, and in sworn against ber Her other all Breast Henry Rothenberger Mre. Crosby gave bail, Rigg, president of the Unite ompany, of Reading, ail its with view vester Crosby and Ella Bheldy. that Ella has two other formation has been with bigamy, ed hustands are said to be Issac of Reading, Harrisburg, John A. Iraotion ( fq that the charging her and ann company will supply mductors and mote This action was taken in recent mupder of Condu A wn. Mr. Rigg save he Ver thie law on t su ban « 1 ver Hor Galloway, nent . rrist axpe > diMoulty « ject nan lad 4 x ng connenled deadly wospons e Yester Block, a Mee | inrge « ‘Keesport, was totally destroyed by was erected tw of 8100 000 + block YOArs ago The first floor was and th #40,000, #8 Jewelry sl reach re, ore will | sa 10.000 ing fire at Rallr imenss ilymber ly reach £30 600 a Br! KE nom f tr the hearis {iss Father A 2 age and vers Hiness wn stair Ww hether rhier tried to evad ut Tor arrest e {wo IHtle boy : oy Ring, wera ed Bank Creek, walked and iote th creek, and wood v » the Allegheny Kiver trrent. i seing a bridg nervilie, guard r was drowned a spanning Steward, aged 6, 250 ORT swilt suits for damages aggregating ono | tuted] against the Philadelphia & Iron Company, and the at Shamokin, The plaintiffs claim that their farm Jands have been injured by culm washed upon their farms by creeks rusniog from the 898 ye nes, a Sirange but i rne. “What wonderful self restraint Cutter has.” “Tadeed? I never noticed.” “Yes; we called him in see my brother yesterday and he didn't oper ate on him for appendicitis.” Cleve land Leader, ———————II ss os a Dr. fo if the word of a “prominent Swedish official” is trae, Emperor Willlam takes to himself the proud credit of having crushed Greece, and now, by way of keeping his hand In, I= thinking se rionsly of crushing Norway. It is & marvelous thing that, under ‘he enor. mons weight at Berlin, this longsnf. fering old planet doesn’t bulge out at all ite weak spots and crack all along ‘t= sea lines. TT BIO The I2test Keeley invention Is in the line of rnding out “the keynote of love.” He says thai every person kas i a musical chord, and that it can be | registered on a “negative sympathetic | register.” This beats a mere motor all Lollow if It works, Grant's Meligious Bide. “l aw a profound believer,’ Grant, "in a special agd a geaeral provi dence that shapes the destiny of indi ax not to destroy man's free agency.” On another occasion, while versing with Dr, Cramer, Lis brother in-law, about ls experiences, «on he sald planned to do, “Did you ever pray to God for aid and success? asked Dr, Cramer “Often, mentally, but briefly,” he an swered, “1 asked for strengt!s and wis 10 Carry tion my task. talk much about much It § Grant, wile President, spoke one day to nn successful ternving 1dke my mother, | but 1 thin # the all-dmportant suliject religion tremendous responsibility of the office, “I often,” sald be, “during the sess Ff gress, after evening spent un day of hard work and in meetin far bey He various questions sit up till It mid action for my “130 pray for his ever you “Yes: night day pray« I 3 he answe; in prayer, though I don Dr. Crame: mentions ¢in Grant told him Life Ten't Worth Living in i oe 9g §: ¢ ho, po : Testimoniais free “1s are the best of amastodon, in = preservation, was dug uj unna, Ind. It was found about six feet be iow Lhe surface. One of the tusks measures seven feet eight inches in Jength. Pe slate near Car. To Care a Cold In One Day. Take Lazative Bromo Quinine Tabi ¢ failed if 1 Tails 10 « els All sti refund money “a minutes will die in ninety 3 water which contains one per cent In water which contains twenty ohol it will die instantly jow's Soothing Eyrp for ehNdren g : i the puma reduc) flammia- lays pain, cures wind colie a boille few explanations, 1# charaoe. ot defend itself t w t+ The igaretted Ohacoo we ( w Star Oke Sie we are n Fits permatently cured, No fits fies afer firstday'suse of Dr. K Nerve Restorer. $2 trial bottle and treats Da RH. Kuisg, Lid, 81 Arch St, Phils. Pa. Getting into debt is getting into a tangle some Let, I nee Piso's Cure for Consumption both in Dr. G. W, Parren He who foresees calamities suffers them wice over, Chranite Whe ymatiom, From tw Induasivial Jackson, Mien, Tie subject of this sketsh Is af six yours of age, sud actively engaged in tarm ing. When seveatesn years old his bart his shoulder and a few yours alter commenesd to have rheumatic puins lo it. On taking a slight cold or the least sirain sometimes without any Apparent cause whatever. the trouble would start and he would suller the most excruciating pris He sullored for over thirty years, and the Ingt decade has suffered so 1 wns unable to do Irrene News ich that he ytiis the fre. HE were add. ed, waking wlio almost us he ew invalid, w any quent o 4 similar Williams « remedy some threes Lhoges od, the dizz v for over Dr ink fault he fe at | his former ilizer Ct actual in the for: + i FOR 14 CENTS & Weawisht gran L000 new cus. traners, and hence offer ] Aad Queen Victoria Lettuce, Kiondrke Melon, Jumbo Giant Onion Brilliant ¥iower Se 0s, Werth 81.00, for 14 conte postage We nvite § knew when row emce 1 seeds you will pever got sion oul them. Poiateess ® Bbi, Catalogaione bo. RN SALERR BEER «0. 14 with 1.50 ROSE wis IF Yoru Brroesi socepl $100 and ngFwar iim 1s We rent RTAlilee 6 De . Room 63, 20 Broadway, MN, 3} reputation. Catalog ECKTIES FOR EVERYBODY yearly, pi per cent & 3 SEED Garden & Flower free to all, we %ii] send Hve diferent desi mitoses agains ¥ nN HES LER & with a world-wide JAMES J. 1. GREGORY A805 Marblehead, Nass, Ladies or Gentivivesn, pont ga id iy By J. Bamiiton Ayers, A. WM. ¥.D, This is a most Valusble Book for the Household, teaching as it does the easily-distinguished Symptoms of different Diseases, the Causes and Means of Prevesting such Dis eases, and the Simplest Remodies which will alleviate or cure. 598 PACES, PROFUSELY ILLUSTRATED. The Book is written in plain e . day English, and #s free from techn terms which render most Doctor Books so valusless to the ity of readers. This Book fs to be of Service in the ity, and is 30 worded as to be readily understood by all. Only 60 CTS. POST-PAID. - much Information Analysis of ve and Families and Correct Index. in do fn an to = » »
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers