AT a German court-martial—Captain (presiding)—'‘Then I’m to understand that the accused offered you a cigar when you were doing sentry duty?” “Yes, your honor.” **And you de- clined?” “Yes, to command, your honor. **And what reply did he make?’ “You are an ass, your honor!" “Permit me to congratulate you,” sail one Bostonian to another; *1 un- derstand you've had an addition to your family, *Yes. Much obliged to you.” “Boy or girl, may I ask?” “Girl. I've just coms from the optician’s.” “From the opitician’s?’’ ‘*‘Yes; been having her measured for a pair of eye-glasses, you know.” Sow of a railroad man to his father: “0, father! Come and see this wash- out in our back yard.” The father, who thinks he has had washoutsenough on the road without another in his own yard, heaves a sigh and goes to his win- dow prepared for the worst. It is Mon- day, and he discovers the wash out on the clothes line, Soxme think that Iouisville s cold winters have been brought on by the increase in the number of street cars. Everybody knows how cold a street car is. a ———— During the war, Dr. Lloyd, of Ohie, con- tracted consumption. He says: “It was by the use of Allen's Lung Balsam that I am now alive and enjoying perfeet health.” If you have a cough or cold, take at once Allen's Lung Balsam. and $1 per bottle, at Draggists, I x 25¢., Ole. a A A A Woman would sooner rule a than fill it; not so a man. A ——— a ADIES Those dull, tired looks and feelings peak volumes! Dr. Kilmer's FemALe REMEDY ts C "13 all cor ditions, resto res vigor and vitali- ty and brings back youthful bloom and beauty. Price » $1.00 ~8 bottles $5.00. heart Man is in friendship w bat w in love, and the reverse, covetous of the object than of the feed- ing for it. Instantly Relieved, Ann Lacour, of New Orleans, La., “I have a son who has been sick two years; he has been attended by our leading physicians, but all to no purpose. This morning he had his usual spell of coughing, and was so greatly prostrated in gonsequence, that death seemed imminent. We had in the house a bottle of DR. WM. HALL'S BALSAM FOR THE LUNGS, hased by my husband, advertisement ye stered ig, and he was writes : {or We ad- 1 tantlv ra SLAanLY Ie sterday. Ee —— Hood's Sarsaparilla This successful medicine is a carefully-propared extract of the best remedies of the vegetable kingdom known to medical science as Alternatives, Blood Purifiers, Diuretics, and Tonics, such as Barsaparilla, Yellow Dock, Stillingia, Dandelion, Juniper Berries, Mandrake, Wild Cherry Dark and other selected roots, barks and herbs. A medicine, like anything else, can bo fairly judged only by its results, . We point with satisfaction to the glorious record Hood's Sarsaparilla has en. tered for itself upon the hearts of thousands of people who have personally or indirectly Been relieved of terrible suffering which all other remedies failed to reach. Sold by all druggists, $1; six for £5. Made ofly by C. L HOOD & CO, Apothecaries, Lowell, Maxs 100 Doses One Dollar is characterized by three pecullarities : 1st, the combination of remedial agents; 2d, the proportion; 3d, the process of securing the active medicinal gualities, The result is a medicine of unusual ¥rength, effecting cures hitherto unknown. Bend for book containing additional evidence. “ Hood's Bars: apaiiia tones up my system purifies my blood, she Arpens Jy : appetite, and seems to make me over.” J.P. THOMPSON, Register of Deeds, Lowell, Mass. “ Hood's Sarsaparilla beats all others, and is worth its weig aht ingold.” I. BARRINGTON, 130 Bank Street, New York City. Hood’s Sarsapariila Sold by all druggists. $1; six for §5. Mado only by C. I. HOOD & CO. Lowell, Mass, 100 Doses One [ Dollar. ASKIn of Beauty isn joy Joy Forever, DR. T. FELIX GOURAUD'S riental Cream, or Magical Hood's Barsaparilla Beautifier. Hemoves Tan, Pimples, Froeo- Kies, Moth. Patches Hash, and Skin dis eases, and © ve ry ble No other cosmetic as Beautifies the Skin, oo Sa tection, It has stood the test of thirty years and isso 3 Jens wo taal * to be sure the Purifies as well © sauisisd Dr. L. tent)" A. Maye As you w Use then, Teo preparations.” rt ett Ba ftevery day. Als udre Subtle removes superfin. ous hair without | n jury to the akin. {i FERD. T. H¢ )PEINS, Manager. #4 Bond St, N.X For sale by sll Drugyists and Fancy Goods Dealers i {pron hi ut the ., Canadas and ound N. Y City, ot R. H. Macy's, Stern's, Elric i = diey® ‘a, and other Fancy Gods Dea i of base imitations, ad! L480 Reward for arrest and proof of any one selling the sane, 1.GURE FITS! nth, sis 13 th ean y ¥2 rr. not the best of them [ &tAD a severe attack of Over & year ago, and could not hear common I suffered terribly from head. I procured a roaring bottle ee weeks could PTR SON HER A 51 HMA A CURED, Ferman Asthma Cure o » diate relief in (he worss ¢ effects cures where a oh ne si shaper rad Fr can cheerfully say to all who are af- flicted with the worst of diseases, catarrh and deafness, take one bot Ely's Cream Balm and be cured. worth a $1,000 per bottle to any man, woman or child suffering from catarrh. | —A. E. Newman, Grayling, Campbell | Co., Mich. We siderate, quiet hatred; a passionate hat. red a es 80 far less. CONSUMPTION CURED, 1 physic an, ret em ————— An ol ary the speedy and permane at cure of Consumption, Bronchitis, Catarrh, Asthma, and all lan for Nervous Debi! ity and ali Nervous Complaints, alter having tested ils wonderful curative powers in thousands of cases, has felt it his duty to make it known to his suffering fellows. Actoated by this motive and a desire to relieve human suffering, 1 wiil send free of charge, 10 all who desire it, this recipe, in German, French or English, with fall directions for preparing and using. Sent by mail by adaressing with stamp, naming this paper, W, A. NOTES, 140 Power's lock. Ro ster, N. ¥ Virtue maketh men on the earth fa- mous, in their graves glorious, and in heaven immortal, » PrLaix QUESTIONS FOR INVALIDS,— Have the routine medicines of the pro- fession lone you no good? Are you discouraged and miserable? If so, test the properties of the great Vegetable Specific, Dr. Warxer’s Carvorsia Viszaar Brrrers, the finest invigorant, corrective and alterative that has ever seen the light, and you will find relief. the soul purifled by truth, Dr. Emil Beip, of Detroit, Mich., writes : Practicing for 54 years 1 never yet BAW a better purging pill, in the market, than St. Bernard Herb Pills, and I recommend the same to a suffering humanity in general. This pill has the good property of acting directly on the liver and removing all acids and mucus in an easy way and thus cleansing the blood. iu — I envy no man that knows more than myself, but pity those who know less, Women, as a rule, are not inventive, They have no desire for new wrinkles, unless using Carboline the New petro- leum Hair producer, can be classified as a new wrinkle; all handsome ladies ase it. AA sn Women do nol read; they listen with the eye. Original, prompt, clean, sure and ef. fective for pain and soreness, Hop Porous Plasters. When time spares beauty he jcom- oletes it, by Important, When you visit or Bly New York City, save artlo Gata Unto ned Unio mn A saa rr fd 4 treo million ion Grand Union Da better for iess money at enn - any other AXLE F RAZER | BEST IN THE BF Ge STR yours’ WoRLD ss the Cer LOGY exper MIDDLESEX ARE ALL PURE WOOL, Always look wall and give long sary genuine article have on a silk Dr h Ineniey Jaade from Middlesex Flannels bear { or. NDELL, FAY & CO, Agents, Mr PLENEX CO Boston, New York, Phisdeiphia 5 TON WAGON SCALES, Tare Boon and Beem Dag, |Oo = 1h shames, ———— A SINKERTO ON'S on AGENTS 55 Dette Sersiona] Thie VER Aaa Deteciives. PROFUSELY ILLUSTRATED, sad EASY TO SELL. Fer fall daseripthve clres! ty dal territory and exis terms Magen Address. §. W. LETOX & Cc 0. + Pudtishare, Xow Tou YREE TO PAM Fine Cot loved Ra O14 Bun Tavern in Philadelphia la which frat lodge in N, America was organised and bald, Ales large (Nasteatnd Catalogue of Masonie books and goods with bottom prices, Ales offer of Sent clam Sasines to F, A, M, REDDING & CO Masssie Publishers avd Masalactarers, til Broadway, New Forks Whosoever is afraid of submitting fon than with truth. Do Not be Alarmed at the raising of blood from the lungs, sumption, and only shows the healthy ef. sulted mm ulceration of the lungs, positive remedy for consumption at this stage. If taken Jaithfully, it will cleanse the blood, heal the ulcers in the lungs, and bmid up and renovate the whole system mss li—— wise, Walking advertisements for Dr. Bage's P | Camrmn Remedy are the thousands it has cu Think for yourself —and think much more than you talk. an It was an old oriensal doctrine that wo- men have no souls. More enlightened Jistioacphy concedes that they have purer, ner, more exalted souls than men, But they are too often contained in feeble, suf- fering bodies, which hamper and retard rg full development. For all those nful allments incident to the sex, Dr. erce’s “Favorite Prescription” is tho best specific in the world, and is sold under a positive rantee that it will do all that is Fouitve or it. Price reduced to one dollar. By druggists. mm AIS The devil never yet tempted a man whom he found judiciously Fploped. ——————— If a cough disturbs your sl take Piso’s Cure for Consumption ph well. mr—————e 155 MID MI ITI For burns apply flour wet with cold water, as it quickly gives relief, TAR ED iol ( MARK. RE Absolutely, Opiates, Emetios and Poison PROMPT. AT DaugomTs AXD DrarLwns, THE CHARLES A, YOUELER CO, BALTIMORE, up.” Free from SAFE. SURE. AN Rheumatism, Neuralgia, Bucknehs, Headnehs, Toothache, rain, Heras, ste, ote. PUICE, FIriY CENTS, 4 AND DEALERS, THE rd A. YOUELER 0. BALTINOR KE nD. ph waved from photogra Taken January 1886, PROFS ANDRAL KILMER. M.D" BINGHAMTON, N.Y. THE INVALIDS BENCLFACTOR. Discovercr of Dr. Kil § Ladi’ Special and Home Tre RBpecific ine treatm all Complaints and Diseases peculiar Daughters, Wives and Mothers Ear ch pie kage contains 3 bottles, h Kind Is nlso s I separately Female Remedy, (Blood and System 81, Autumn-Leaf Ext. 0 reatm't)§ 1. U& O Ancintment, External * «50 §¥”Or the three in one Pac Kage82.00, down" Eliminates Hun that cause Borofula, nid fches, nd Exposur Jers ag Ain yeule [ Tumor, ft sarily sym OImpLiyY answer rf. } ton. N.Y bed-ridden*' a { Sent Free), SOLD BY ALL Heal GGISTS, “Piso’s Cu L. la Waters, Druggist, Kinioer, M Wil san aot Pis Tastes good i by dn “Pie's Cure cured me of Coney Rosemreon, Drandrwine, MJ AILS. LA Ky Tup Tastes good. Use I tims, Sold by druggist *Piso’s Cure for Consumpti Weaver used.” 0, I. Ro yn is the Lest medicine ren, Antnewe, Kans. PISO'S CURE FOR . os ALL ELSE FAILS, Best Congh Syrup. Tastes good. Use in time. Said by druggists, CONSUMPTION “"Piso’s Cure for Consumption 1 indo me” -H.H Srassrrs, Newsrk N.Y. nz wonders for PISO'SICURE FOR ed RES WHERE ALL i Best Cough Syrup. Tastes good. Use in time. Sold by dry CONSUMPTION Vinegar Iie ative and tonic, v imegar Bitters is the best remedy discovered for romotin pesti curing DesdachoSand Troan the vital powers, ( Vinegar Bitters assim. food, regulates the stomach and bows healthy and natural sleep, ar Bitters ia egy stands at the Seadof oh ity family om should ever be without it. Vinegar Bitters cures Malasial, Bilious and ar fevers diseases of the Heart, Liver and a hundred other palnfal a rlndies, for MARL or Merchania ere, for an our I manny Which Inst shold tein the hands of every child and youth in the Any two of the above books mailed free on rh} we of the abors books ma fees. ILE. McDonald Drag Co., 532 Washington 8t., N.Y, PATENTS jn, sr mpi inventors G Han, P Patent Lawyer. W hiington, | . C. PENN V&d vin PILLS “CHICHESTER'S ENGLISH.” * The Original and Only Genuine, nd ature Beltane he Fikes Imitation ie te AR Ask tras Ih torn EAR ALTE, oiler, o Riot he Pr TS for rains in letier by peturn wm PARE WO: Clhiiehonter Ch ha oy € wdinon Syuare, Philada., Bold by Dern fafa every whers Ak A yp: bo tar’ Eaglish” Pennyraral Pills Fa Bi, hes. Tintes ols, FTER ALL OTHERS FAIL, CONSULT DR. LOB ne Nort FIFTEENTH ST, ” (Below Callowhiil St, Phila.) "mY EARS EXPERIENCE. Guarantees to ours the afflicted and unfortunate ion ret Vege. table Medicines. Book on oa fron; send for it, Advice free ao yon A Office 1 v a. 4 10 10 I. bh urs, 1 LAM oer MTP tL by mail Pensions i.“ SEER HAN, ALY, FARM NOTES GROWING BWEET POTATOES. —Far- mers should bear in mind that this de- licious vegetable can besgrown at the North as well as at the South. Per- haps not as successfully, but so that the average farmer's family may enjoy the luxury of such sweet potatoes. They will do best in a sandy loam, and should be planted on a good dressing of decomposed stable manure, We get some ideas regarding their planting from the Rural and Workman of Ar- kansas, which says that the bottoms of the beds should be as hard as possible, From our own experience, having made the seed bed light, we cansee why the plan suggested is the proper one to pursue. In our own practice the roots, having almost unlimited extent in which to de- velop themselves, grow to great length at the expense of size In other dimen- sions; but if the bottom of the bed, some four inches below the growing plant, had been so firm as to prevent the extension of the tuber its diameter must of necessity be greatly increased which 18 very desirable, So then let that be born in mind: plow the soil very shallow and then mark for the rows, and place a good quality of decomposed stable manure in the rows, turning two furrows over it, leaving a level top in which the plants should be set about sigftsien inches apart, and sufficiently deep to reach the moisture, The earth should be Another idea, which rows, turning fur- the potatoe beds, In hoeing any of the vines wh tarting to grow. farther hoeing if weeds appear let them be pulled by hand. If rains gin tim Bl i i WILL { BEGETS Bound, Refreshing Sleep. YOR That Tired, Weary Feeling, | +e Sick Headache. | GENTS: —I have been subject to Bick Headache for years, and have tried in |vain, many advertised remedies and several physicians, but all to no purpose, {At last 1 tried your B. B. Bitters—with- out much faith, I admit—but to-day 1 can truly say, that after taking the third bottle I have not suffered from it. I recommend it to all my friends; sev. eral have been cured by it. My little grandson was permanently cured of Biliousness and Sick Headache, which Was B80 severe as to cause convulsions. They have all ceased since he com- menced the use of B. B. B. Irs. B. C. BODLE, Orange, Luzerne Co., Pa. Bini g 2 7 3 \ FOR ' That Ache in Bmall of Back. CURES Rashes and all Skin Eruptions, Dyspepsia and Constipation. - Dyspepsia. GENTS:—1 feel it my duty to say! respecting Burdock Blood Bitters that| it is the best medicine I ever took, I suffered two or three years from stom-) ach troubles and dyspepsia as well as from liver and kidney complaint. I was not able to attend to my business, My! wife was afflicted in much the same, way. We read of your Bitters in the papers and made up our minds that we would try them. The result 18 my wife and I began to improve once and I am now able to do more hard work than before ir ten years, It relieved my) kidney troubles as well, We both wish you the makers of it, Sodspeed. JOSEPH LANDON, Chelsea, % al Vt. Ses FIs grad Hens grouine voles Lasmped wilh (D8 abOYe| fy ont uv TRADE WARK J ask for AVS Lhe FINE BRAND end for Sassy! ptive eatnlc in the vicinity of Copen- is regularly weighed, and the ex- quite general, When a cow falls below 700 gallons per annum she is led off at the butcher. A liberal system | ails, and the amount of a pound of butter pois, or about sutter per cow, once for of feedin miik varies fron an to 3 1a Barsaparilia, Frazer Axle Grease, There is no azer Brand ig will last \& the Fr greasis 1 havin Une insist o1 Crease two weeks ¢ -_-_— It takes as much wit not to displease 1 as it takes to please her, p———— The best is the cheapest. Hop Plas- y contain active m cure of pain. — tll nsec A woman need nol always recall her age, but she should never forget it. Wny CONTIN powders, snufls alm, E the use of irritating or liguids, Ely’s pleasant of application 50 cents, at It is easily applied with the the most obstinate cases, once. We will mail at 60 cts Owego, N. XY. A A — Sincerity 18 an openness of heart; we what we usually see is only an artful dissimula- It gives re. FOR DYSPEPRIA, INDIGESTION, depression of wpir- e and other the “Ferro THOR Rotated. Hazard & Oo, fevers, tonic; and Yor patients recovering from fever or SELECTING SEED POTATORS, —Judg- ing from experiments made at the New York Experiment Station last season farmers can increase the yield of their potato fields conmderably by selecting their seed from the best tubers grown in those hills which yield the largest quantity. In the experiment alluded to “potatoes were taken for seed from the most productive hill, and planted the next spring in regular and registered order. The rdsult was that the largest tubers from the productive hill, and the smallest tubers from the productive hill yielded slightly more than the largest tubers from the least productive hill.” Whether a series of experiments would show similar results Is uncertain, but as it will requize only a little extra labor at the season of digging for farmers to select the seed for their following crop from the most productive hills, it is an experiment that all can afford to try. Beware of worthless imitations of Dr, Jones’ Red Clover Tomiie. The genuine oures headache, plies, d Japepsia Mine, ma laria, and is a perfect tonic and blood puri- Price 50 cents, smn i i sonsiiioos We are often more agreeable through our faults than through our good quall- ties, er. EY: opped fros, Rriasie and snirs of Dr. By Beans Nur e Restorer frase ¥Fitcases Sendo Dr. Kline $21 YATCh St. Phtla., ra TH Kuer all stable manure out of the strawberry patch, unless you know it to be tolerably free from weed seeds, It is cheaper to buy and commer etal fertilizers than to be pulling weeds all summer. Before going heavily into the small fruit business, you must have : full supply of manure or the money to uy it. PTY Is The Best Waterproof Goat » Ever Made, in the hardest siorm ie your storekeeper Coe peio A J TOWER 3 Flmmens Bt, Boston Maes Give all the harness an oiling now, than when the weather is warm. the harness to pleces and wash | with luke-warm water, Take it clean using a dull j dart, | bave 10 pay a good price for it, no other), with enough castor it and keep the mice away. the oil moderately warm on both si ide { of the leat] er, all that is rapidly absor- arness in an airy but use ol sgeyyt scent bed. Then hang z the hs piace to dry thoroughly. of harness, except ough: but the o the pias s should be olled son, at 1 the sweat and dirt each morning with a dull knife, Give the wood-work of the pi ows a coat of paint. Mineral paint 1s very cheap and answers this purpose as well as | more expensive paints. But use the] { best oil. If the plows are dull, take! aul not pressing, Strengthen weak places. { Do not wait for breaks; they always! { occur when the article is in use, hence { when they occasion delay. Give the whiflletrees the same attention recom- mended for the plows, by the forelock. remedy against these pests. His direc- tions for applying it are the following: Open the fleece in several places on each side, or all the way round them is better, and sift in a little of the snuff. A second application is seldom neces- sary. I have tried 1t and it proved sat- isfactory. It is cheap and harmless, and | offer a prize for every tick found upon | your sheep. | AN Indiana farmer finds that it is an | advantage to mix bluegrass seed and other hight grass seed with most saw- dust before sowing. He says the grass seed adheres to the sawdust and enables the sower to spread it evenly. He uses about three bushels of sawdust to one of grass seed, Tne chief advantage of incubators consists in the circumstance that may be hatched in them before fowls show a disposition to sit on eggs, The eggs of dycks, can be hatched in incu- bators to the most advantage, as early ducks of improved varieties sell at high prices In large towns, Tue Keiffer pear 12 poor in quality, and the tree is more tender than most other sorts, winter-killing very com- monly in the west and northwest-—about as hardy as a peach tree. Prevent your hair from becoming prema- turely gray by using Hall's Hair Renewer. Billous attacks are speedily relieved and cured by taking Ayer's Pills. Try them. Sri MIMI The pressure sufficient to rupture a blood vessel is much greater than that to which they are ordinarily subjected. The carotid artery of a dog required from thirty-five to fifty-five times the normal pressure of the blood, and the jugular yein from thirty-two to thirty- five times, I“ paren by Soaking All mgt in a sade of y ng all nl A sauce hot vinegar, salt and bay leaves, and ‘then stewed or braised in a closely- covered pot, with a few carrots and a cuplul water. Serve with potato croquettes and a sauce of prunes, A ——— Tun pretty cotton edging so much used for jomwing children’s uynder- clothing ia} be sewed on with the sewing machine if you baste it to the under side of the garment, Sew di- Gk rectly over the basting thread. i" EST AND CHEAPEST Cough or Croup REMEDY. AB AYN EXPEL STORANT IT HAS NO EQ i. It Contains no Opium in Any A ALLENS LUNG BALSAM in T hres Sigs Bottios, Prios 28 Cents 59 Cents and % Per Bottis 1 i Thome dosirine a r iy f OS RSUMPTL EYEE yf sr (X) LUNG DISEASE should say Hemedy {ON oraay ira the large $1 bottles 50c. and $1 per Bottle. SOLD BY ALL M EL JICINE DEALERS, A FrAaACT. ACTINA, THE CREAT EYE RESTORE Poor. Wiz 1 i ASX, INVERT af wre % "A SULOY, QL adas wt i wu A A - - a dis LORBON ¢ of the ew is Ms cannot exist afts Tu s Address TOF, WIL 11 I A MOCY 1313 Chestnut Str Read the Testimony of Kev, Wm, B. Ohal. fant, a well-knowns Clergyman of Phils. PHILADELPHIA, PA. January 13, 1888, Pastor's Study, Messiah M. E. Church, My Dean Bin—1 feel that I ought to make known my experience with Prof. Wm. C. Wil. son's “ACTINA” BATTERY, not only in jus. tice to him, but also that the aficted may learn where to look for a remedy for serious and obstinate diseases. For five years I have been suffering with great distress in my head, resulting at times in complete incompetency for work: this, together with a throat trouble oausing hoarseness, rendered speaking not only laborious and painful to myself, but un- Pleasant to my congregation. I have used your ACTINA" since the 265th of November, 1885. My voice is fully restored, and since using your instrument and wearing your garments I have not experienced any distress whatever in my head. Have worked 18 to 18 hours out of the 2 for the last five weeks, and nover felt better In my life. My wife is also wearing the Garments and using the “ACTINA,” and finds very great relief, baving suffered 3 years from genoral debility, My little boy of 8 winters who bas suffered from a oatarrhal trouble since an attack of scarlet fever, is using your instru. ment and improving. 1 wish you a continua. tion of success. Very truly and fraternally yours, WM. Is CHALFANT. ———— Throw away your des. Get rid of your Catarrh, an na yey of the eye. or for it would Price, $10, $row be cheap. Will Jast » Rietime. Fifty 1 one 2 tamil) ay i use it. Address Wh, C. WILSON, 1118 Chestnut Street, Phila, Agents wantell In every City of the Umon, $50 a week may be mada Consumption Can HY Cured! HALLS wns. BALSAM
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers