Life's Lettara.
T A VICTIM or nmerrxnwmr.
Out on Oadmu* and his letters '
life is hateful through his pains.
Men are held in airy fetters.
Bound in alphabetic chains.
Childhood's hours are gay and sprightly,
While we wander glad and free.
But how changed is all when tightly
Captive held by A B CI
Then, again, when man la mated.
What a Joy this world would be,
If it were not dominated
By the cum- of I. 8 D I
8o throughout, with power Titanic,
letters all our days pursue ;
But the worst and moat tyrannic
Is the hateful 1 O U.
The Evening Time.
Together we walked In the evening time.
Above us the sky unread golden and clear.
And he bent his hesd and lookoJ in my eyes.
As if he held me of all most .tear,
Grayer the light grew ami graver bll.
Ilia rooks flitted home through the purple
shade
The nightingales sang a here the thorns stood
high.
As I walked with him in the woodland glade.
And our pathway went through held* of wheat,
Narrow that path and rough the way.
But he was near, and the birds sang true.
And the stars came out iu the twilight gray
Softly lie spoke of the days long past,
Softly of hlctsed days to be;
Cloes to his arm and ohwer 1 preat
The coruheki path was Eden to me.
And the latest gleams of daylight died ;
My hand in his enfolded lay ;
We nrept the dew from the wheel as we passed.
For narrow and narrower wound the way.
He looked in the depths of my eyes and said;
"Sorrow and gladness will come for us, sweet .
But t*ether we'll walk through the fields of
bfe
Close as we walked through the fields of
wheat-**
M AnIH Wind tHat Blows Hobodr Good '
With the exception of Mr. Brace, who,
with an interest m the Ice Company, waa
going out to India, accompanied by his
wife and two children—with the ex sep
tus of thia family. Miss Serena Seldeu,
and Mr. Anson Surrev, there were no
other passengers on \>oard the Fairy,
bound for India and Japan. Indeed, Mr.
Surrey had no idea that they nuuiliered
so many souls, and was quite stunned
one morning, when thee hail been some
weeks at sea, at the suglit of a real live
young lady sitting on deck, crocheting
and talking with Mrs. Bruce as tf she
bad mot rained down over night.
" Where in the deuce did that heaven
ly creature come from. Brace ?" said he,
t<waing his cigarette away. " Have the
skies fallen that we catch larks ?"
"That is our friend Miss Seldeu," re
turned Mr. Brace. "She has been too
ill to leave her berth before since we
started—Tom and Amy's governess. Let
me introduce you. Surrey; it's a pity not
to embrace all the advantages of travel.
We're a small family on board. We
really ought to know each other; it's a
duty we owe society;" and Mr. Surrey
was immediately presented in due form.
" I could hardly believe my eyes. Miss
Sel en, when I saw that we had another
passenger just now," said Mr. Surrey.
" It is a most agreeable surprise, I as
sure yon. "
"Thanks," she returned. "I hope
von will have no occasion to change your
mind. They tell me that long voyages
are very trying, and betray one's natural
infirmities of disposition. We shall
probablydiseuver all of each other's weak
points."
" Mine are at your service, if they will
amuse you," laughed Mr. Surrey, not at
all certain that he had any.
" Yon are really too generons. Don't
expect to hold out so good-natnredly.
We are all pretty sure to quarrel and
hate each other before the voyage is
euded, you know. Doubtless, Mrs.
Brace and I would be at sworda'-points
this minnte, if my illness hadn't post
poned the entertainment."
" When my lessou's done, Miss Sel
den, will von play cat's cradle with me,
please ?" interrupted little Amy. " It's
such a long day."
"Yon see the demoralizing effects
of travel already, Mr Surrey." she
said. " Yes, Amy. anything to pass the
time."
" Well, it's done now, this minute.
Three turns two is six. three turns three
is nine," rattling off her table in a breath.
" Have yon got a string ?" Miss Sel den
offe d the ribbon on her fan. " That'll
do splendid. We won't leave Mr Surrey
out, will we? He might feel mis'ble,"
suggested Amy.
" You might pass the compliment to
him."
"Oh, I don't like to do that"
" And why not?"
" 'Cause I heard mamma tell papa
not to give her such things—before
peoples."
"Compliments !" laughed both listen
ers; and by the time that Amy had
wearied of "cat's-cradle," they were
established on easy terms of conversa
tion,and had found mutual acquaintances
to disease.
"How narrow the world is, to be
sure !" said Serena. "It seems so odd
that yon, a total stranger Yesterday,
should know some of my friends, perhaps
even better than I do."
."We were speaking of Professor
Lombard. I believe his nephew, Neil,
is in India somawhere; perhaps yon will
meet him out there."
" Who know* ?" murmured Miss Bel
li en, struggling with n knot in her thread,
and smiling to herself. 44 Have you ever
seen him?"
"We weie classmates at Yale. We
played many a foolish prank t>gether.
He used to swear that ne should die a
bachelor, in those days."
"Like Benedick, because he didn't
expect to live to get married. Tell me
about your 4 foolish pranks' at Yale ;"
and as everybody is aware that these
stories have* a family resemblance to
those of Bcherezade, one being only the
sequel to another, it was luncheon-time
long before Mr. Surrey had finished the
recita'. On shipboard one generally
grow* into a closer acquaintanceship in
a briefer season than would happen else
where. A handful of people drifting
about together, cut off from communi
cation with the rest of Christendom, con
tract the habit of relying on each other
for comfort and entertainment, and be
come more intimate with each other's re
sources than would happen on terra
firma. Thns Mr. Surrey came to know
a great deal about Miss Seldeu's
thoughts and habits of mind, the senti
ments she expressed, the opinions she
formed of men and things, and he took
a great deal for granted. Iu the mean
time they spent their lei ure hours talk
ing about everything, from Utopian
plana for the amelioration of the present
condition of the poor, to theories con
cerning a future existence and the in
habitants of the farthest planet. Air.
Surrey read aloud during long after
noons, and chatted in under tones dur
ing long twili ?hts, or sang her little
love songs full of tender sentiment and
regret, while they watched the shining
wake of the ship. Sometimes they
spoke a homeward-bound ship, and felt
as if the strange ship's crew and pas
sengers were dear friends whom they
would like to hug; sometimes a storm
crept upon them like a painted Pawnee,
ana shook every stout cable like a rib
boa, and again they swung in latitudes
of calm, and watched strange flsli dart
likesun beams through the sea; and dur
ing these seasons Mr. Surrey and Miss
Seldon must have grown either desper
ately interested unawares —seasons dur
ing which the flight of a sea-bird, the
plnnging of some restless sea-monster,
the floating fragments of some wreck, was
an episode and an excitement.
44 Dear me 1" yawned Mrs. Bruce ;
44 even a water-Bpout or a tornado would
be a welcome change. This is utter
stagnation, isn't it, Mr. Surrey ?"
44 Do you find it so, Miss Selden ?" he
asked, relegating his reply to that young
lady. 44 Would you weloome the sea
FRED. KURTZ, Editor and Proprietor.
VOLUME X.
serpent, or * piratical crow swooping
down upon us from no mailer where?"
"'I—I slmll heren glad when we
reach Calcutta," mud tveron*. "In the
mean while I am uot unhajioy."
rt I don't believe wo shall ever reach
Calcutta," groaned Mrs. liruce. * "1
think we are just like the phantom slop
which sails on and on for ever aud ever '
"I, for one, shouldn't object, ' said
Surrey, lightly.
" Certainly not. Yon are going round
the worhl {.rnur /hm.o rlt f in/x. llcav
crs ! 1 can't mi lersUssl any one choos
ing this everlasting voyage of his own
his will for pleasure. It's a jierfoct mar
vel to me that Selena Cousrutcd to
come."
"And perfect godsend to uie," inter
polated Surrey.
" S.>mv othW jveople ought to think.
But I wonder you're not uiote impatient
to reach Calcutta, Serena; 1 do iudeed."
" All impatience iu the world wouldn't
carrv me tliere a day earlier."
" Well, I wasn't so philosophic at your
age," as if that were a feather in her cap
of jieculiar luster; and biking up her
novel: "Here's a goose of a heroine
who doesn't know which of her two lov
ers alie prefer*. I would hke to set hor
adrift with them on a voyage hke this."
" Aud the cvnsequeuce would l>e that
she would hate loth, you think ?" asked
Mr. Surrey.
The following twilight Miss Seldeu
and Mr. Surrey were pacing the deck to
gether and lie was opening his heart to
her—a sanctuary alwavs pretty securely
closed to most people—telling her of
his boyhood and his travels, his flirta
tion and his first hobbledehoy love
making.
"And where will yon go after you
have done up Japan ?'" she asked; " and
after you have made the world's tour,
will you uot long for more world's like
Alexander ?"
"After all, I may not go to Japan, '
he began, drawing a camp-stool beside
the deck chair she had just taken. " I
—it depends—it depends a great deal
upon—yourself. Miss fereua," he said,
boldly, aud leaning forward to look into
her eves.
"l!pon me, Mr. Surrey?" r<posted
Serena. " How can I jtoesibly haie any
thing to do with it?"
" It all depends upon—upon—whether
von oonld consent t" love me. Miss
Selena, a 1 nave learned to love you ?"
" Lore "you, Mr. Surrey?" risiug and
withdrawing the hand he hail Lakeu lu
his owu, while the light that broke m
upon the proceedings of the last few
mouths, showed her no flattering pic
ture of herself iu the attitude of a dirt.
"Love you? Oh, Mr. Surrey, don't
yon know? Has Mr. Bruce never told
you ? Don't yon know that lam going
out to Calcutta to be married ?"
" To be married ?" repeated Mr. Sur
rey, in a stifled voice—"to be married?
I give you my word, Miss Seldeu, that I
never dreamed of such thing. Perhaps
it would have been w. 11 to have men
tioned it vourself. I supposed you
were Mrs. Bru-v'sgoverness—Mr. Bruce
did tell me as much as that. I beg
yon will pardon my confession, and
"forget it Shall I take you to Mrs.
Bruce ?"
" Yes, tlyiuk you. I ought to have
mentioned it; only I thought you knew,
or it wouldn't sinnifv to you," said
Serena, humbly. " You will pardon me
for taking so much for granted. I never
meditated mischief, believe me. I was
Mrs. Brace's governess before—before
mv—-engagement, or till I decided to
take this journey. " Good-night."
Then, hesitating, and offering the huid
she had withdrawn: " We are friends
still, Mr. Surrev?" timidly.
" Only friends the merest keep much
that I re'sigu," he quoted. " I don't feel
disposed to verify your prediction that
we should be sure to quarrel lefore the
voyage ended, though it might prove a
diversion. Pleasant drianis. Alias Sel
deu."
In a community so small, imprisoned
in space so limited, two people could
scarcely, avoid each other wtthout re
mark, especially two who hail been al
most inseparable the day before; there
fore, by tacit consent, they fell into the
same apparent intercourse in the pres
ence of others. To be snre, embarrass
ments and annoyances waylaid them;
but people who will fall in .ove, or in
spire the tender passion mat apropos,
must suffer the consequences. There
were not as many fete a-tctr as previous
ly ; or if unavoidable circumstances
threw the two together, there followed
oppressive silence, or conversations
upon every topic but that which occu
pied their thoughts. They no longer
killed the lagging hours with chess, or
read from the same page. For want of
other recreation, Mr. Surrey unearthed
his Cremona, and drew melancholy, be
seeching airs from it which made Serena
shiver.
44 It is like the song in a sea-shell,"
she said 41 Why will yon play those
dolorous minor chords ? They remind
me of nothing hut desolation."
Mr. Surrey put his violin away.
41 Have yon ami Miss Selden lieen
cross with each other?" asked Amy, one
day, climbing upon his knee, after see
ing them sit silent for half an hour, look
ing out on the sea, or anywhere but at
each other—" have you and Miss Selden
been cross with each other ? Then why
don't you kiss and make up, like the
way Tom and me docs ?"
44 Perhaps Miss Selden and I don't
want to make np," said Surrey, amused
iu spite of himself.
44 Oh, Tom and me alwavs does. The
Snndav book says love your enemies
—yonltnow it does."
Miss Selden awoke that night with a
dreadlul sound in her ears. Was Mr.
Surrey consoling himself with
those dirge-like airs at dead of night,
or was it the shout of angrv waves lie
sieging the ship, the sound of voises half
drowned by the blast, of winds chorusing
in the rigging, of feet hurrying from
stem to stern ? Had they been boarded
by pirates, struck a reef, or sprung a
leak? She dressed hastily and opened
her state-room door. Mrs. Brace was
already up, wringing her hands and
pacing the saloon.
44 1 always said so; I kneu< we should
go to the bottom sooner or later," she
cried. 44 Oh, Serena, you'll never see
Calcutta, nor any body ! And there's all
your trousseau 'll never do any one any
good—and that splendid peacock silk
that was so becoming—and to tlunk he'll
never see yon in it—and I going from
Dan to Beersheba to match the trim
mings 1"
44 Are—we —going—down?" -asked Se
rena, steadying herself and her voice
with an effort. *
" Any minute, for all I know. I can't
find out exactly what's happened, but 1,
know the Fairy hoa liecome unmanage
able, and she's drifting about at her own
sweet will. We might as well liave a cat
at the helm. The three men who went
to sea in a bowl aren't a circumstance to
ua. They've cut away heaven knows
what, and there was a noise like the crack
of doom just now, which must have been
a mast."
"Where—is—Mr. Surrey?"
" I don't know. Swept overboard, for
all I can say. Mr. Bruce would have al
lowed me to go to the bottom in my
sleep, Ido believe. He never BO much
as called me. Well, Mr. Surrey," as that
gentleman appeared, " this it a nice situ
ation for Mr. Bruce to drag his innocent
family into, isn't it? Don't mind me.
Comfort Serena, if you can. If he who
has promised to love and cherish leaves
me at such a crisis, what can I expect of
THE CENTRE REPORTER
• *tranger ? Will the shin bold together
till sunrise, do you think ?"
" I've no doubt of it," ht answered,
crossing Serena. At that instant there
WOK a Bound a* if the lIMTMU thtaiMlTM
rolled together * scroll; the ship
quivered at every fibre, and seemed to
crack nt every lieaiu. Mm, Bruce throw
ii}> her arm* mid uttwnol * prohmged cry.
" 1 think we have struck," mud Mr. Sur
rey , solemnly. " I'm afraid our day* are
uumlifml. Mt*s Solden Scrrii* hadn't
wo Itetter take Amy's advice and make
up? If 1 tuny not live in the light of
your cwiutsiuiiw, you will not deny mo
the privilege of dyiug with you ? '
For tin mutant It seemed to him that
hor figure swayed toward him, that oho
trembled and half turood to him, with
an unwonted softness in hor game, and
tUou alio liad Irawn herself up proudly,
and had loft turn with outstretched
arm*, alouo.
It proved that they had adlidal
with a merchantman, bound homo wan I
from India with a cargo of jute and
gunny-lag*; but whilo tlio Fairy was
found to be iu a sinking condition, tho
Comet, t<emg a lioavior vessel, hail sua
taiuoil but alight injuries, and was ou
a>Jed to put about to the rescue of crow
and jMuetengers. It aaa a ghastly scene
that followed, photographed indelibly
upon Mum Seldeu's memory; tho awe
struck faces of the rough men who were
laahiug little Amv uja.ii Mr. Surrey's
shoulders; the iuerfeotual flare of lights
against the twilight of dawii ; the boil
mg sea which tore tho hfe-taiat into
chijia; the slipjary cable across which
alio toiled to the Comet's side, hand over
hand, now suspended alwvc some death
ly ocean chasm, now almost shrouded in
the spray of its angry waves.
" I shut my ores tight," said Amy,
afterward, " ami hugged Mr, Surrey.
It was awful dark and lonesome. Have
we got to do it again? Do we always
stop tliat way ?"
" Heaven save us!" ejaculated Miss
Selden. " 1 don't believe but I should
slip into the sea and have done with it,
if it were to do over;" aud she leaned
back indolently iu her seat under the
canopy which Surrey had improvised,
being ou deck for the tlrsi time after
days of illness, the reaction from excite
ment " What are you reading Mr.
Surrey ? I really begin to lie persuaded
that 1 am still a denizen of this breath
ing world, aud to take an interest in my
species."
"I ui resiling the Calcutta Iktilt/
and it's like a newapajier issueil the day
before the flood. It tells its things we
didn't know, to le sure, but which are
old stones at the same time."
" We are finding a new road to the In
dies, like VHMM le (tania, only it isu t a
aliort cut. What ia there new in Calcut
ta, or rather what i there old ?"
" I see that my old classmate. Ned
Lomlfftrd, baa forsworn himself and mar
ried—a I teg urn princess, for all 1 know.
That won't interest you, though. Here
au interesting account of the reception
of the Prince of Wales, and— Are you
faint. Miss Seldeu t Shall I take you be
low?"
44 I must see the Calcutta Daily first,
please;" but the letters all swain liefore
her eyes. " Who did you say was mar
ried ? Your old classmate ? Who ?"
" Only Ned Lombard. You knew of
him, diiin't you ?"
" Married! Nod Lombard married!
Yes—l—knew —him. If yon could give
me your arm. Mr. Surrey ; the ship is
pitching ldly, is it not? I was going
to Calcutta, you know, to marry—Mr.
Lombard. I suppose he has treated nie
very badly, but 1 can't feel as sorry as I
ought. 1 may as well tell you, Mr. Sur
rey, that it is six years since I saw him
—out of sight—out of mind—and 1 they
say that absence compters love.' That s
some excuse for lnm, if not for me. Ima
gine me sailing iuto Calcutta and hndiug
Mrs. Lombard in possession Wouldn't
it have been awkward?" and she tried to
laugh, and broke down. " I'm sure I
don't know why I should cry, only it
isn't so pleasant fco be jilted, even if—
However, would you ask Mrs. Jtrnee to
oome here ? 1 must let her know that I
shall bid you all good-by when you leave
the Comet, au<l keep on to New York. I
suppose she will consider it horribly im
proper without a chaperon; but what
else can I do ?"
" There's the Rev. Mr. Hymen on
board, the missionary from Upper India,
though he hns hardly been out of his
berth," mused Mr. Surrey.
"Yes; Mr. Bruce might intrust me to
his ghostly care; but he's so bilious
looking, it wouldn't l>e cheerful."
" I think. Miss Serena, since you ask
my advice, the Wat thing for you to do
would be to marry your humble servant,
Anson Surrey, before the Braces leave
us."
" Here ? Oh, Mr. Surrey, yon take
me by surprise ! Married aud jilted the
same day ! To be sure, the Rev. Mr.
Hymen could road the service, if he is
vellow and jaundiced. And yon really
We rue? Do yon know, it was only
when you proposed to me on Ward the
Fairy that I discovered I was going to
Calcutta to marry a man 1 didn't love.
What will Mrs. Bruce say? What will
every body say ?"
" They will say, 4 It's an ill wind that
blows nobody g<*d,'" answered her
lover.— Jfarper'i Ilazar.
Reynard ( aught.
An amusing incident occurred at the
city ball headquarters the other after
noon, it Wing ut tho expense of Colonel
Ward, who had charge that day. Cap
tain Ireland, who commanded one of the
cavalry companies, lounged in during
the afternoon, and in conversing with
Colonel Ward, seemed very serious
uWnt something. Finally he said :
44 Colonel, I've made an arrest; his
name is Reynard. I know him to be
a professional chicken thief, but I can't
say he hail been doing anything when
arrested. Still I thought be might have
had some connection with the mob, and
that if I spoke to you atKint it you might
interrogate him.'
44 All right, bring hira over," said the
colonel; 44 send a guard for him."
Ireland departed, but in a few min
utes returned, apparently perplexed,
and said : 44 Colonel, the jailer refuses
to let the prisoner go with two unarmed
men."
44 Oh, I can't see the necessity of such
technicality," replied Colonel Ward ;
44 but send over two armed men."
Ireland again bowed himself politely
out, and returned in a few minutes, re
marking, as ho came in : 44 Colonel, the
Crisoner is out in the Ball. Will you see
im ?"
44 Bring him in," waa the response.
Thereupon there appeared two men,
heavily armed, carrying between them a
fox which had Wen captured somewhere.
Colonel Ward gazed for a moment, saw
the joke, and said : 44 There's no need
of interrogating him. I can tell he's
guilty by his looks." Jxiuiaville
| (Courier.
Where an Arorn Sprouted.
Out on the Indian Valley road, in
Nevada, there is a pine tree, with a
I diameter of nearly two feet, in which is
an oak limb growing which has already
attained a considerable length and a
diameter of three inches. It does not
seem to thrive in itß strange quarters.
The theory is that an acorn by some
means got lodged in the bark of the pine
tree, and dust settled around it in suffi
cient quantities to make it sprout, and
that it gradually became a part of the
tree itself.
CENTRE HALL, CENTRE CO., l'A., THURSDAY, OCTOBER 4, 1877.
WOJDEKtTL UULKOi DlSti.
Haw Owe Train Canned Vaalfcrr aa a Mtuelr
Track aa Ibn I alaa farlSr.
The lioloit (Wis.) >We /Yes* nay* that
Dr. H. 1". Strong, brother of the general
superintendent of the Chicago, !!tu ling
ton and QiIUICJ railroad, who bos re
cently returned from Colorado, tells the
following exciting story;
List Saturday our train vras naming
from Denver to Che venue, to connect
with the Uuiou Pacific at Cheyenne.
Wheu within 18 miles of Oheyeuue aud
about thirtv-flve miles of Greeley, and
while naming up a ten-mile grade, one
of the axles of the tender broke, and the
whole train, with the exception of our
car, was tlirowu from the track and badly
jammed up. The assistant ujermteiidciit
of the road happened to lie on board,
aud, as we surveyed the ruins, he told us
that there was no engine at Cheyenne
that could be sent hi our assistance, and
we must look to Greeley, and that we
were probably booked for an eighteen
mile walk to Cheyenne, where we would
have to remain over Sunday.
While ihiukiug of our haul luck, I
happened to look back over the road,
and observed that we liad leeu running
ou IUI up grade for a long distance, and
at the same time I remembered that
about fifteen mmutes la-fore we had
jumped the track we met a train on a
side track going to Denver. A thought
struck me tliat then- wus away out of
our dilsmina. I turned to the engineer
and asked him if tliere was any UJJ grade
toward Greeley. He said that there was
only one—-a heavy one alsnit eight miles
back. After tliat it wus all down grade.
I called for crowbar* instantly, ami two
or three tram men ran out thirty or forty
rods ou to the prairie and dug up the
bam. You see, the railroad company
have coupling irons, cruwlau* and such
things "cached " in the ground all aloi g
the road, so as to have theiu ready for
use at any time. They have to kecji
them under the ground, lai-ause the air
is sorantiod that iron and all the coarser
metals, wheu exjjosed to its aetton, very
soon lose their deusity, the |>articles
separating and the metal becoming like
so much sand, without strength, and
perfectly worthless. While the boys
were after the crowbar*. I explained to
our Jarty that I believed we could pry
our ear loose from the ooupliug with the
traiu, and having a down grade, we
Oonld cwteh the train we had met We
soon had the car uncoupled with the
aid of crowliars, aud a dozen or more of
us started on the cor. She glided along
foster and far-ter, gathering *jet*i every
second.
Not only familiar with the gride*. the
only fear I It ml was Unit our ear would
not Rain sulUcient moiueutum to over
come the up grade, though, of oourae, 1
hoped it would. We very soon struck
it, and I assure you I watched the pro
gramt of the ear with a Rood deal of in
terna. And it J nut made it and that wan
all. We jumped off and pushed her a
little, and down we started on n twenty
five mile down grade. 1 looked ahead
and aeveral miles off could easily see the
t am we were after, but it was almost
instantly shut out from sißht by our
suddenly ruuniuß into a dense mass o
firing gasahoppera, evidently seeking to
afiglit on tlie ground. We ha>l all been
standing on the plutfoiiu to this time,
but when we met those grasshopper* we
were driven into the ear, as they struck
our faces with the force of hailstone*
Looking through the windows we could
see uothing but grasshoppers, so thick
were they, aud only now ami then could
We get a glimpse of the grouud even.
After a minute or two I became a little
auxious, as I knew we were g"ing very
fast, and, as 1 had engineered the brake,
I started up from my seat, and tying a
heavy handkerchief uU.ut my face, went
out to the platform and seize>l the brake.
For a minute it wasn't clear in my mind
whether 1 could hold out against the
(>elting of the 'hoppera or not, hut sud
denly, when I wtls about whipped, oar
car emerged from the swarm, and as
soon as I raalirad it I ton* the handker
chief from my face ami looked out fur
the train, with my hands ou the brake;
ready to avoid riinniug into it. I felt
queer, when, in looking, 1 couldn't see
that train, and when I took one look
around aud saw that our car was running
ou bare ground, with the track about
twenty-five rod* off to my left, I tell yon
the cold shivers ran up and down my
back to a considerable extent. If a man
ever put "down brakes," it wa* m . I
laid right liack and tightened that brake
wheel three mora coga than had ever
been done by tlie stoutest man on the
rood. She stopped, ami as I opened
the car door to call out the crowd, I
heard an engine whistle "tlown brakes."
J jumped off to the ground, am), looking
backwnrd toward the sound, saw that
engine slowing up Wlund ns on tbe
track.
I hadn't a word to HAT. I began to
think that I would lik* to got out of that
country right away, ami be tucked up in
my little bed at home until I got well.
The other fellowa were noon jumping out
on the ground, and they were astonished
a* I was. We started for Uie train,
which had now enme to a standstill, the
conductor Hhouting as we came up:
" Well, boya, yon did that pretty well."
Saya I: "Hee here, miater, we're
atrangera in thia country, and though
we've had aotne ex|>erieuce in the East,
we'll be blamed if we know what yon
mean when von av wo did that pretty
well." " Why, taking your car pant ua,
of course. We were afraid aotne green
horn waa managing your ear when we
Haw it coming down the grade, before
the 'hoppers struck ua. We knew, how
ever, we were leaving you a 'hopper bed
to do the trick on." Well, to come to
the point, the train ahead of ua had
mashed so many dead 'hoppers on to the
rood bed that it waa filled up full, even
with the rails, so that when our car got
along it slid right off* the rails, and the
ground was so hard and even that it rnn
close on to four miles before I put on
the brakes and stopped her, anil while
ahe was running those, four miles we
passed the train we were trying to over
take, the dense mass of flying 'hoppers
preventing ua from seeing it as we
went by.
In conversation with the conductor
afterward I learned that it was quite a
trick of the engineers on the Union
Pacific rood to pass another train. They
will pull their trains off the track, go by
undiscovered by reason of the density of
the 'hoppers, pull back on to the track,
and when the passed train fetches up at
the next station its engineer has to " set
'em up" for all hands. AH it is supper
time, and to get down to results, we got
our cor lack on the track, hitched a
'hopper plow on to the rear car, and the
engine and train backed up to the wreck,
from which we had l>een gone just nine
teen minutes, in which time wc hail trav
eled eighteen miles twice.
TKXTS FROM TUB TALMCD.— If thy
wife be small, liend down to her, anil
speak to her; do nothing without her
advice. Everything in life can he re
placed; thy wife of early days is irre
placeable. An honorable man honors
his wife; a oontemptible one despiseth
her. The loss of A first wife is like the
loss of a man's sanctuary in his lifetime.
Ten car loads f ammunition, 140 tons
in all, have been loaded upon the steamer
John Bramhall at ths Winchester rifle
works, New Haven, Conn. The destina
tion is Turkey, and this would tend to
show that America leads the world in the
manufacture of firearms.
LAKUK VS. SMALL (ITIB*.
The Kuur•■inn. (iron ik el >luulrl|itl IxSrkl
rdni-oa s.wr s.iarMlo Klaures.
Mr. Robert I'. Porter, of Ruokfanl,
111., in an article in the Hepteinlier Hal
ui.V, makes a rather forcible comparison
of the management of large and small
cities. To present tlie mul defects in
our management of iiiunieijia) affairs in
densely populat*d cities, he selected
twelve of tlie largest cities on the conti
nent, and shows tiieir debt, valuation,
tax lew, and population now and in
lHtlti. Tlie cities taken were New York,
l'hiladelplna, Chicago, lioatou, Cincin
nati, Ht. Is mis, Baltimore, Han Fran
cisio. New Orleans, Hruoklyu, Louisville
and Pittsburgh. The sggregates of tlie
four elements iu these cities art* as fol
lows ;
1< ISM
Municipal debt V lJti.tkis.lL 'J ♦15J.066.577
AUKMOI valuslioti
ef tho pM|>erty 4,00*. 5*0,9*1 2,300. *42,000
Annual taxation .. 79, 163,777 4J.6JJ.674
Population 6.(143,61* J,671,664
The writer then takes twelve cities of
medium sire, and presumably governed
by those who pay the taxes. In such
communities Uie proportion of Uie pro
prietor* to the whole ia larger Uiau in
Uie twelve cities given ulxive. In Uie
twelve smaller cities Uie reckless and
vicious part of Uie community is small,
slid incapable of 1 sung organized and
Its! by unscrupulous men. That Uiese
conditions diminish Uie dangers of abuses
iu the management of municipal expend
t ureH seems proven by a comparison of
the following tabic of aggregates wiUi
the one alsive given, Tlie cities taken
for the second comparison were Alle
ghany, Columbus, Chelsea, Davenport,
Fort Wayne, New Haven, Paterwon, Ht.
Paul, Taunton, Trot, L'tica and Kurlnig
ton. with Uie follow ing aggregate results:
Iws l*c*
Municipal dot* ♦ 11,6*6,060 ♦ 5,irj,34*
Assessed value of
the property 27*,*73.313 126,230,714
Atiuusl taxation ... 3.431.2J7 1,6*5,0*3
Population 441,1J1 30,*61
In Uie first table, representing Uie
dozen large cities, we find debt in
creasing at the enormous rate of IH7 Jx-r
cent. iu ten yearn ; in the second table,
representing the twelve smaller cities,
the rate of increase is nearly '.*> per cent,
less, or 98 per cent. In Uie Urge cities
valuation men aced but 74 per cent.; in
the smaller, 121 }>er cent. Of course
the rate of increase iu populstiou was
higher. In large cities the amount of
debt per capita of the {xipulatiuii is SK6.-
50, and yet it must la* remembered Uie
pr|ortiou of the proprietors or tax
payers to the whole lxipulation is much
gr ster in the small than iu Uie large
cities. Itelow we give a table allowing a
summary of these comparisons ;
SMIJ OHM lirs
e* r
Aggregate increase of debt ia
ten years 9* I*7
Aggregate lUtTeVse of ralus
tioii in ten years 121 74
Aggregate increase of tax
ation in ten years... .. 10* *6
Aggregate men-ass of popula-
Uun in ten years 42 8*
Amount debt |or cajst* .. 226.50 $*6.50
From this it secuis that the great dan
ger and disgrace iu the management of
munici|>sl matters is coufiued to our
large and densely populated cities, the
facts and figures presented certainly in
dicating that such is Uie ease.
Thought* for Saturday Mght.
The sure way to tins* success is to
miss the opportunity.
Philosophy, if rightly defined, is
untight but the love of wiwiom.
Hypocrites are lteinga of darkness dis
guised iu the garment of light. .
He that kcc|>* his temper is (tetter
than he that can keep n carriage.
Though fancy *tnny la* the patient's
complaint, necessity is often the doctor.
He who will not reason i* a bigot,
he who cannot ia a fool, and he who
dares not i* a slave.
If all the year were playing holidays,
to aport would IH> as tedious as to work ;
but when they seldom come, they are
wished for.
Vanity is our dearest weakness, in
more senses than one : a man will sacri
fice, and starve out all hia inclinations to
keep alive that one.
There ia nothing evil in life for him
who rightly comphrehends that death ia
uo evil ; pi know how to die delivers us
from all subjection and constraint.
Like many virtues, hospitality is
practiced in its perfection by the poor,
if the rich did their share, how would
the woes of this world be lightened !
We die every day ; every moment de
prives ua of a portion of life and advan
ces us a step toward the graTe ; our
whole life is a long aud painful sickness.
Death opens the gate of fame, and
shuts the gate of envy after it ; it un
looses the chain of the captive, and puts
the bondsman's task into another man's
hand.
Many an honest man practices upon
himself an amount of deceit sufficient, if
practiced upon another, and in a little
different way, to send him to the State
prison.
By wlint strange law of mind is it
that an idea long overlooked aud trod
den under foot as a useless stone, sud
denly sparkled out in new light, as a
discovered diamond I
Death alone of the gods loves not
gifts, nor do von need to offar incense
libations. He cares not for altar nor
hymn ; the goddess of persuasion alone
has no power over him.
Persona who practice deceit and arti
fice always deceive themselves more
than they deceive others. They may
feel great complacency in view of the
success of their doings ; but they are in
reality casting a mist before their own
eyes. Bncli persons not only make a
false estimate of their own character,
but they estimate falsely the opinions
and conduct of others. No person is
obliged to toll all he thinks ; but both
duty aud self-interest forbid him ever to
make false pretences.
legend of (he Jaspilne.
We are told that a duk* of Tuscany
was the first possessor of this pretty
•limb in Europe; aud he was BO jealously
fearful lest others should enjoy what he
alone wished to possess, tliat strict
injunctions were given to his gardener
not to give a slip,not so tuneh as a siugle
flower, to any person. To this command
the gardener would have l>ecn faithful,
hail not love wounded him by the
sparkling eye of a fair but jiortionlees
peasant, whose want of a little dowry,
and his poverty, alone kept them from
the hymeniftl altar. On the birthday of
his mistress he presented her with a
nosegay, and to render the bouquet more
acceptable, ornamented it with a branch
of ja mine. Thepovcra falia, wishing
to preserve the bloom of this new flower,
put it into fresh earth, and the branch
remained green all the year. In the
following sjiring it grew, nnd was
covered with flowers. It flourished and
multiplied so much under the fair
! nymph's cultivation, that she was able
to amass a little fortune from the sale
of the precious gift which love hail made
her; wlien, with a sprig of jasmine in
I lier breast, she bestowed her hand and
1 wealth on the happy gardener of her
heart. And the Tuscan girls, to this
day, preserve the remenibranoe of this
adventure, by invariably wearing a nose
gay of jasmine on their wedding day;
and they have a proverb which says a
young girl worthy of wearing this nose
gay is rich enough to make the fortune
of a good husband.
FAIt.Y, UARDKM AMD MOIHKMOI.D.
I'eler* (sit are.
The soil iiu which celery is designed to
I*- grown should IK* such an ia not sub
ject to drought, in coiumuu seasons.
The seed-lied ahoultl be rich and rneb
low, free from atotiea, stick* or like ob
structions ; and sjiocially prepared by
thorough, deep pulverituiK of Ibe aoil,
and mixing therewitb well flued, partly
decayed atalde manure ; thai which baa
leeu prepare,! and kept uuder Oorer la
liest Fine Uie surface aoil Uiotoughly,
making it even and aiuuotb ; aow the
weed thinly in rowe, eight or ten inches
apart ; make the liedaof convenient wultb
to weed bandy. After tlie seed ia aown,
roll the lied with a garden-roll, or a|iat
it over to have a compact surface. Heed
aown iu tlie open ground in April ia
early enough for early garden culture.
Give all the after cultivation necessary
to keep |arfectly clear of weeda, atir
nng tlie a ill to keep tlie plauta health v
and growing. We have found that much
stronger r<M>ta are produced if the planta
are ahcttrcd or atopped, oiioe or twice
previoua to tmusplair ing.
l'lte ground for trauaplauUug into
aliould lie rich, frealily prepared, and
well worked. Lav off in rowa three feet
apart for the dwarf varieties, somewhat
wider fur tlie larger kinds, having the
surface aa eveu as jxisaible ; a convenient
marker does tins to beat advantage, and
set plauta an mcbea a|iart in the row.
Mueb depcada upon tlie care and skill
used in tnuianlanting, to have it done
well, so that the roots are properly in
serted, tlie soil lieing put in contact with
them all, and properly firmed, #o that
th re will lx* the least ptaw'ble check of
growth of tlie plants. Moist or damp
weather ia the most suitable for trans
planting, and July the best tune for gen
eral garden culture ; often that planted
early in July will mature auite us early
as tliat planted a mouth earlier, give suf
ficient cultivation to keep the soil loose,
free of weeds, and a healthy progressive
growth. Alxiut tlie last of August the
plants will have made sufficient growth
to begiu to earth up—this earthing ia
u*ees*ary for the proper blanching and
rendering it eatable ; be careful in earl h
iug to close the stem np ao that no dirt
will get into the center, and never cover
tlie crown. Farthing is done aome three
or four times, as the plants grow, the
earth from between the rows being
used, hsulcd each way to the rows ; tlie
last or finishing earthing, is done with
tlie spade, bunking to the top of the
plants. Home three to five week* are
needed to thoroughly blanch ao as to
give the stems that crisp, teuder qnality
so desirable. Farthing should always
Im* done when the foliage of the plants is
free of wet or moisture, that the dirt may
not stick to it. Rural Ifotne.
llstMwrkiarld \o|r.
TOOTH WASH. —The sal est, cheapest,
most universally accessible and moat
efficient is s piece of white soap, with a
moderately stiff tooth-brush, every morn
ing.
To KID A liocss or FLEAS. —Sprinkle
plenty of common table salt all over tlie
ran tela just lie fore Uie sweeping is done .
ana sweep often. If this is followed
closely the fleas will disapjiear within a
few weeks.
IxmiMKn ETXUM. —Cut a slice of
stale bread as thin as possible; toast
both sides well, but don't burn; when
cold lay iu cold spring or ice water; put
between a pi*ce of old linen and apply,
changing when it gets warm.
Stums KKMKDT FOB BCBBB.—Com
mon whiting mixed with water to the j
consistency of a thirk cream, spread on
linen, forms an excellent local applica
tion to burns or scald*. The whole utirut
surface should IK* covered, thus exclud
ing the action of the air. The ease it
affords is instautaneotis, and it only re
quires to be kept moist by occasional
sprinkling of cold water.
To TASK Itrsr OCT or HTEBU— Place
the article in a bowl containing oil, or
wrap the steel up in a soft cloth well
saturated with kerosene, Let it remain
twenty-four hours or longer, then scour
the rusty spots with brickdusL If badly
rusted, use Halt wet with hot vinegar.
After scouring, rinse every particle of
brick dust or salt off with boiling hot
water, dry thoroughly, then polish off
with a clean flannel cloth and a little
sweet oil.
To WASH A BUCK AKI> WHITK OOTTOW
DHAKA. Have a tub partly filled with
hot water, add one large tablcspoonful
of powdered borax; wet only one part of
the dreaa at a time, the basque first; use
very little soap, and only on the most
soiled pieces; wash quickly, rinse in
warm water containing a tablespc infill
of table salt; starch on tbe wrung aide,
v ring very dnr. shake out well, and hang
where it will liry quickly; next wash the
ove.rakirt and then the underskirt iu the
same way.
To HKMOVK GRKASK SI*OTA.— In re
moving grease s|>ots from clothing with
ben sole or turpentine, the usual way is
to wet the cloth with the detergent and
then rub it with the sponge or the like.
Thia only spreads the grease and does
not remove it The proper method is to
place soft blotting pajer beneath and on
top of the grease spot, after the latter
has been thoroughly saturated with the
bentole; then press well. The fat is
thus dissolved and absorbed by the
pajier, and entirely removed from the
clothing.
VVlnlrrtM Rosea.
A correspondent of the Country
(trntlrman says: Perhaps my plan of
wintering rosea may be useful to some
other amateur. I had a hot-bed frame
not in use, aud after losing rmy oses in
the house year after rear, I concluded to
improvise a small ooid-pit. I aauk in the
ground a very large dry goods box. Over
it I placed a hot-bed frame aud sash,
put the potted roses in the box, and the
thing was done. As the oold grew in
tense, I drew up earth around the aides
of the frame, ami covered the sash with
an old piece of carpet, and did not then
see my rosea until spring, when they
were simply watered, the carpet re
moved, and the plants left under the
sash for two or three weeks before re
moving. I have practiced this method
for three or four winters, and with per
fect success. The plants fairly jump
when the sun strikes them in spring,
anil they are in a healthy growing con
dition when I transplant to the border.
I wish now to make a liermanent cold
pit, in order to use the liot-bed frame in
spring.
!.• In Nwlnr.
Investigations by the department of
Agriculture, at Washington, according
to Mr. Dodge, the statistician, show
losses from disease* of swine during the
past twelve months of 4,0(10.000 animals
of all ages, or a money loss of more than
$20,000,000. One-fit!) of the reported
loss Occurs in the State of Illinois.
Next iu prominence are Missouri, lowa
and Indiana, which together lose $lO,-
000,000. Florida, Alaliama, Mississippi
and Louisiana have nearly as large a
percentage in loss of numbers, Aggre
gating in value $1,800,000. The losses
are very small in the country bordering
on the great lakes and the Pacific coast.
Of the remaining districts West Virginia
comes nearest exemption, and Ohio and
the Atlantic coast States stand better
than the alluvial districts. The appar
ent loss is equivalent to a third of the
sum of the exports of the pork products
last year.
The Belgian census just taken shows
the population of the country to be
6,386,186.
TERMS: $2.00 a Year, in Advance.
Infiastrj.
The industrious man always finds
more leisure for study srnl investigation
than the laxv, shiftless man. The busy
men keep the worhl moving; the busy
men sustain the farmers' clubs, the
Oranges and the man projects of pro
gress and improvement. The lasy man
is always full of trouble; be uever sue
eeeds; he is always find in" fault with
every one but liimaelf. It is the idle
men who mutiny at sea, ami tliere is a
world oi philosophy iu rwsliziug the fact.
We rememlr an old Cape God sea cap
tain who, wheu tliere was nothing else
to do, ordered the watch on deck to scour
the anchor. Home oue mils cheerful
ness the daughter of employment, aud
it is certainly true that occupation is the
necessary basis of all enjoyment Men
who have half a doseu irons in the Arc
urc not the ones to go crazy. Put in all
the irons jrou have, shovel, poker, tongs
aud all, without the least fear of being
too busy. It is the man of voluntary or
compel fed leisure who mopes and pines
himself into the mad-house or the grave.
Employment is nature's physician, ac
cording to Ualen, and any occupation
which is innocent is most certainly better
than none at aIL
Schiller declared that he found the
greatest happiness in life to consist in
the regular discharge of some mechani
cal duty. Motion is nature's law; action
is a msu's salvation, physical and mental.
Stagnant water becomes putrid, flowing
water is pure end sweet. Idleness in
man is rast as surely moral death. No
thoroughly occupied man was ever yet
miserable,' though he may have had aa
idle moment in which be may have
thought so. Discontent arises under
want of occupation, and that no man
need be without who is blessed with
health, erea, hand* and the usual physi
cal endowments. Real life is thought
and action, and usefulness lengthens our
days. Laziness, like rust, eats into the
very heart of our strength; it is the
paralysis of the sou). Nature never lie*
fallow ; if we grow nothing, useful, be
sure w shall ourselves run to weeds.
And yet nine persons out of ten are
looking forward to the coveted hour
when they shall have leisure to do noth
ing, or, in otner words, to allow their
energies to stagnate. False philosophy,
All power appears in transition; the fire
fir only glows when upon the wing.
Keep busy, that ia the true motto. That
man among us ia onlv truly wine who
lays himself out to work till life's latest
hour, and that ia the man who will lire
the longest and who will lire to the most
purpose. We lire in deeds, not in rears.
Keep busy 1
" Absence of occupsUoo is not rest ;
A nund quits vacant is s mind distressed."
( apt. Crape's Vejage.
Tlie New Bedford (Maaa.) Mercury
publishes s letter from Capt Crapo aud
some extracts from a little volume which
lias been published in Eugland,in which
the captain " spins his yarn," giving de
• tails of his experience in crossing the
Atlantic in a twenty-foot beat He ears
be has crossed the "big driak " twenty
one times, that be is not a captain ex
cept of tlie New Bedford, never having
risen above first mate. He undertook
this last venture from a desire to outdo
everything previously recorded in the
wsy of crossing the ocean in a small
host His wife accompanied him because
she could not consent to his going alone.
The passage was a good deal rougher
than he had anticipated; it was like a
lanl winter passage, and had they not
.succeeded in from {MMsing vessels
fresh meat, bread and water, their fate
would have been sealed before they
reached England, though they had taken
a supply of corned meats, fish and fruit
calculated to last through, even if more
than ordinarily delayed. The only ex
citement experienced waa when, ou two
or three occasions, they found them
selves in a school of whales, whose
splitting aud blustering (Tightened Mrs.
Crapo. In rough weather, sometimes
for two or three dava at a time, they
would lie to, attached to a drag or buoy,
and on these occasion* the captain got
most rest, for when favorable winds pre
vailed he dared not leave the helm for a
moment. In fine weather he never took
more than four hours' rest a day. Once
be kept at his post seventy hours con
secutively without rest. His wife had
scarcely a good night's rest during the
whole vovage, which occupied fortv-nine
days. They s)Kike a dosen vessels and
steam ships, and were kindly treated by
all. Once the rudder of the host was
twiakd off, but an extra one was at hand.
His wife has now crossed the ocean four
times, but will never do the journey
again in so small a craft, nor would tbe
captain, for lie declares the task a great
deal rougher than he looked for. Tbe
boat is schooner-rigged, with two masts
carrying leg-of-mutton sails. She draws
onlv three feet of water; her keel is
thirteen feet; her total length is barely
twenty feet; her tonnage ia 1.62, and she
ia thirty-four inches deep.
A Counterfeiter's Offer.
Thomas Ballard is now confined in tbe
Albany (N. Y.) penitentiary under sen
tence of thirty years' imprisonment, of
which he has yet over twenty-seven years
to serve. He was convicted of having
iu hia possession a plate from which
counterfeit notes were printed. He now
offers to the government knowledge de
rived in his business, the application of
which, he says, will render the counter
feiting of its notes impossible in the
future. He HUTS the blue and mi fll>ers
which uow mark the paper used are too
easily woven in by hand, and he proposes
to construct a machine which will manu
facture paper that cannot lie imitated by
any *f tlie ordinarv pnccaaas. He aims
to supplant the ml and blue fibers and
the loos! strip of color which now marks
the paper used by the government, by
raglea, liberty heads, stars and other
devices which may l>e selected, to be
struck from some substance having a
metallic appearance and inserted in the
Ei per in such away as tola" ineffaceable.
e professes that hia only motive in
urging the adoption of his plan is to
render counterfeiting so difficult that
others will be saved from suffering ancb
penalties as have been inflicted upon
him.
A ilearl-Rroken (loose.
The following story is reproduced here
on the authority of the Des Moines
(Iowa) Register : " Yesterday morning
several geese were on the road in front
of Wells' livery stable. Among them
were two that wero particularly intimate.
They were constantly together ap
parently the closest comrades. While
they were near the middle of the road, a
wagon came along and run over one of
the chuma. It fell, unable to rise, writh
ing with pain. The other instantly ran
to it, dretUed his plumage with its bill,
aud finally stood a moment looking at its
dying mate. Then, as if satisfied that it
was injured beyond recall, lay down by
its side and died. The goose that had
been run over died a few moments
later."
It is predicted that within fifty years,
a district of 100 miles square, including
the counties of Athens, Perry, and
Hocking, in Ohio, will equal in product
ivenees any coal region in the world.
This section has twenty-two feet of solid
coal in five seams, the greatest rein
being in some places- twelve feet thick,
and nowhere lees than six. Mingled
among the coal beds are inexhaur table
ones of iron.
NUMBER 36.
being te HrkeoL.
" The cau— of education to hanged I"
he muttered, be —idown on the curb
stone on Shelby street
He w— * lad of thirteen. Hi* pant*
were supported by a pie— of wire
clothes-line girted around hi* waist, his
list was ancient *nd gre— Y, and hi* big
flat feet seemed to be waiting far a thun
der shower to wash them dean.
" That'* what ail* IN* I" he went on,
a* to pushed Hl* torn into tto wet sand.
"I don't believe in a feltew difflng in
and learning all there is to learn, and
not letting other folk* have a chance.
There's lot* of other folk* in till* world
beaid— me, audef ain't going to to
a hog, and try to learn all there is to
learn.
After a minute he went on:
"Don't I know 'nufl now! Three
times two are *ix, four times five are
twenty, and four and four are eight.
That's correct I could get 'em if I
went to school fur a hundred years.
And don't I know how to spell ? C-a-t
is 'cat' the world orar, and 111 tot cm
it evevy tune. H-e-n spells 'too,' sad
I know it well if I weighed a ton."
He rose up to throw a atone at a dug
acrom the street, sod after rcauming hi*
—at, to went cm:
" Jogerfy kinder wrratle* me devu,
but I don't go ranch cm jogerfy. What
do I care whether an island is entirely
surrounded by water, or whether there
ain't any water within leu mil— of it!
H'puee I'm going to boy and —ll islands
for a living ? 1 don't car* which is the
Highest mountain or the longest river
do 11 I'm going to keep a feed Maw,
and when I'm rolling bales o' hay around
will I cere about mount— and riven t
I've heard the boy* go cm MOOT export*
and imports, and straits, and seas, and
capes, but what's them to me I If a
feller wants s bag o' cads, is to going to
wait and —K me when the Island of
Madagascar was discovered f"
He carefully examined the big toe at
Ids left foot and the heel of his right
foot, and gloomily obeervA:
" The old folk* are making ready to
push uie into school, and I've got to
make ready to keep out I can't take to
school, somehow. I could sit here and
study all day, but the minute I git into
a school-bouse I'm nervous. Something's
going to happen to me this week. I'll
be taken home in a wheel barrow with a
big gash in t his heel, or this toe almost
cut off. That will mean four weeks on
a crutch, and they don't allow lame boys
to go to school and cratch up sod down
the aisles. Or, sposin I go home with
palpitation of the heart f, The old lady
lias had it, and I wont more than got
into the boo— before shell have me 1
tucked up on the lounge, the camphor j
bottle down, currant jell and sponge
cake in the distance, and shell call oat
to the old gtnt:
" Father, it'A no nse at thinking of
sending this boy to school. He looks
stout and healthy, but he's a mere
*1 ladder. The DO— atmosphere of the
school-room will kill- him before snow
flies.'"
The boT looked np. There im a grin
all over his face, and be chock led:
" Palpitation ia the key note 1 A anre
toe flan be seen— a palpitating heart ia
hidden away under bide and fat and rib*.
Now then—ooab —Wooah,
hold TCT breath roll yer eyee, kick oat
ver Ml leg, and make her bob around
like a At tm a hot atove-oover."— Detroit
Frte /¥BM.
I*icaic Xttw.
Wear all jour jewelry, andyour finest
shoes.
Don't take any spoons. Everybody
does that, yon know.
If there iue ten in your art, carry four
knives and three cups.
White goods are the best to wear at a
picnic, being the most popular.
It is not necessary to carry vinegar,
jiepper or butter. Tney can be borrow
ed from other parties.
lie sure to take plenty of cake and
jiaatry. People at a picnic rarely hare
any appetite, and thus need something
of a tempting nature.
In packing a baaket it is the beat to
pnt the custard pie and rice pudding at
the bottom, with the package of salt
next It matters not so much about the
location of the other articles.
As soon as you reach the grounds,
pick out a desirable companion and stroll
off by morsel ve*. Some ooe will set
the tables and do the necessary lugging.
There is a providence which looks after
this especiallv.
What a picnic would be without hornets
is a matter of conjecture, aa there has
never been away to And oat A hornet is
not denominational. It goes to ell pic
nics. And it is a desirable adjanct It
tends to modify greediness, beaidee add
ing largely to the general enthusiasm.
Five hornets at a small table will do
more to level social distinct!cms and to
piMuiote social intercourse than an awful
disaster in a village.
It ia well enough to tell what one
ought to eat, and how he ought to eat it,
at a picnic. But no rule, however sen
sibly constructed, ever worked welL
There is only one way to eat, and that is
aa you get it. It ia folly for a man who
receive* an article to lay it down to
await its proper place in the course.
The propei article and the proper place
for its disposal never reach an individual
at the same time. As it ia, he finds that
the food matches into his system in
something like this order : Biscuit, frost
ed cake, pickle, meat, jelly cake, sand
wtoli, pie, lemonade, pickle, chocolate
cake, sardine, pie, cake, ginger bread,
lemon pie, padding, corned beef.—Dan
bury Aetr#. ,
A Novel Marriage.
The Roashire Journal MTI : A would*
be bride end briilegroom, the former ft
farm lftbonr, end the latter belonging
to Roeelie, after having succeeded in
getting the " banns " formally proclaim
ed in their respective parishes, applied
to tlie Established olinreh minister in
Cromarty to unite them in happy wed
lock. The reverend gentleman, how
ever, declined, for reasona assigned.
They proceeded to the registrar, strong
in the belief that he had some power
wherewith to make them one, bnt he
was from home. The remainder of the
day till ten r. M. waa spent in parading
the streets, accompanied by two brides
maids, and in appealing to the sympa
thies of crowds of boys, who enjoyed the
bin immensely. On Snuday another at
tempt was made at wedlock, the oonple
this time taking matters entirely into
their own hands. Proceeding to the
Established church, they both stood up.
and, in the presence of the minister and
congregation, joined hands, the deter
mined husband loudly saying: "Jo
hannah, I take yon to be my wife," the
bride retaking a' similar delaration in an
equally audible tone of voioe.
A Discriminating Cat.
It requires qnick hearing, sharp
observation,aud a goocUmemory to know
always a friend's peculiar ring of the
house bell, although there is no donbt
an individuality in that, aa in every
other human act. Not to be able to do
this, is not, however, a proof of dullness
in child or man; but when done by a oat,
is worth noting. A lady in Boston had
a cat which for years always left its rug
and went down the stairs to the front
door when its mistress rang, to meet her,
if the doors of the rooms were open;
but it took no notice whatever of the
ringing of anybody else.
T It Dm 4.
a* MM arm*. run.
Ifl should fcav* void 4*sh— to my sysr
White Umn ft) vtaMt In tbs M I# • i
If I should fafl tohsaratyaMM's MM* MM
Or soy tetftitew te mm ttesshnid ten.
Ifl atonld MW to MMW low or wtt;
Blind, tat, or dumb, tow tetter wk m—l
. to!
Blind, dsaf, or dumb—l wiH not think of It
Yst tto night WNUM wton I atoll to til
Tto toy te vkiah t mnn gelt into
prieoo—whiskey.
Too thousand glass y— trt told to*
nnnlly in tto United States.
Klish* Hyatt, of Dtritn county, lad.
; tot 4,000 acr— of flora thin an—cm.
Suicide it common, and it often con
sidered meritorious among tto Hindoo*.
[ A Maryland hoc— w— —artd to death
a few day* ago by (be not— of a locomo
tive.
They take good oar* af tramp* at Wil
liamaport, Pennsylvania. They impriaoo
them.
A Pennsylvania tramp In a moment of
weak— accepted a job of splitting
| wood.
There are ninety public and one Iran
dred and eighty private bank* hi Oar*
many.
A farm hand for hanreating it paid in
Oeotral Italy —ven oenU a day, ami
considers himself a lucky man to find
employment at that rata.
A Nebraska farmer hitch— a pair of
oow* to a wagon when to joorneya, and
nfilto them when be com— to a toli
gate, paying the toil with the milk.
Tto differ— between tto preeoher.
builder and the architect of a church k.
amply this. One i* tto rector, the
other tto erector and tto third the direc
tor! , .
Three men wore found hanging from
a tree in Tent, and one of them was
placarded: "TWy 4ole hone*; here hi
where we found them, and here ie where
we left them. "
Tto great Porto* engine hi Machinery
toll, Philadelphia, h— torn taken down
and packed ready for removal to Provi
dence, K L Seventy railroad ears will
be needed to onrry it,
"Gentlemen, I introduce you to my
friend, who i—'t stupid —to appear*
to be." Introduced friend, with vivaci
ty—" That'* praaealy die difference be
tween my friend and my—lf."
One firm in New Tort, engaged in tto
manufacture f matches, consumes per
annum 700,000 feet of white pine lumber,
100,000 pound* of sulphur and 100 too*
of straw board for boxes.
A New Tart chemist —ys, to want*
nothing a— than the— parte, a barrel
at old water and twenty cent*' worth of
drag* to make six gallon* of just such
champagne fool* pay a dollar a pint
for.
Japan has perfected another evideaen
at her adoption at Western civilization.
Hhe bv established twmtr nsLonal
banks, with • capital of §82,276,100 yea.
The TOO is neariv equal to so American
dollar.
Hie eighteen thousand bombs thrown
by the Russians into Kara oust them one
million, five hundred tbonssiid rubles,
or about 91,006,00a Thus far they
hare Dot collected the interest on that
large sum.
Capt. Beaufort saw neat Smyrna, in
the East, a cloud of loeasta forty tnilea
long and three hundred yard* deep,
ran taming at lea at 169,000,000,000.
That beats all the Kansas grasshopper
stories.
It appears to be among the laws of
nature that the mighty of intellect should
be pursued and cooped by the litileL a.
the aolitary flight of one little bird ia
followed by the twittering petulance of
many smaller.
In England it has been proven by a
aeries of careful examination* that coun
try boys of fourteen years, average, an
inch and a quarter mere ia height and
seven pounds more in weight than city
boys of the same age.
Thomas Jefferson's birthplace, Shad
well, in Albemarle county/Va.. ia ad
vertised for sale. Martha Washington's
house, in the same State, where she
lived before she married George, has
joat been sold for $1,225.
Not ooe of the member* of the Amer
ican rifle team has black eyes, and only
one—W. H. Jackson—who has a dark
eye, the Oulor being a dark brown. Five
of the members have gray eyea, one
light bine, and one bluish gray.
The will of the late Chaunoey Bcaa, of
Terre Haute, lad., leaves the balk of
his property and fIOO,OOO in eaah to the
Rose Polvtcchnic institute of that city,
$150,000* to the Vigo county orphan's
harms and $75,000 for a free medical
dispensary.
John Hearae, a termer living near
Raleigh, N. C., gave a dinner to a re
markably polite tramp, who said he had
been acquainted with a family of the
same name in Quebec. This chance re
mark led to the union of two brothers
who had been separated eighteen years,
| The loveliest, sweetest flower (humi
lity) that bloomed in Paradise, and the
first that died, hae rarely blossomed
since on mortal soil. It is so frail, so
delicate a thing, it is gone if it but look
upon itself; sad she who ventures to
eeteem it bar's, prorea by that single
thought she has it not.
Edith's mamma was sick, and the little
one felt, as she expressed it, "very
mournful." At night she prayed : "Oh,
Lord, please to make my dear mamma
well again. She must have eaten some
thing that didn't digest. Don't let her
be sick say mora, for it's no fun to her,
nor to me either."
If you ask a boy to break up a niece of
lump ooal so as to keep himaelf from
{reeling, he regards his lot as one of ex
ceptional hardship ; but let him And an
old torpedo lving around loose, he will
hammer at it with a stone until the per
spiration stands in great drops upon his
forehead, or an explosion telievea him
from his self-appointed task.
The operations of the internal revenue
officers against illicit distillers in the
South during the last six months have
resulted as follows : Illicit stills seised,
forty-one ; distillers arrested or sunend
emf, 1.064; officers killed, including
Lieut Mclntire, United States amy,
four ; officers wounded, four; citizens
assisting officers killed, two ; wounded,
two : distillers killed or wounded, four.
A Teaaeeaeeaa's Bad Bargain.
Last Thursday morning a raffle waa
made up by some of the citizens of Paris
for a box of live hundred cigara. There
were twenty-five chances at one dollar a
chance, lie plan was that known as
the ■hot-gun plan, in which each mau
uWmg chauoe pats his mark on the
blank paper surrounding a target. The
target n placed on a pivot and whirled,
and while thus whirling is flred at with
a gun loaded with small shot, The man
whose mark comes nearest being bit
takes the prize. In this case Oeorge
' Leflis took a chance, but would not put
down his mark until all the other marks
had been placed around the target He
then went to each of the rafflon and
said: " Ton and I have each got a
chance in this cigar raffle ; let us go in
cahoot '—if you get them divide with
me, and if I get them I'll divide with
you." This arrangement he made with
eighteen of the chance holders, telling
each to keep their partnership a secret
To prevent any possibility, as he
thought, of winning th£ cigara himself,
he made his mark aa far from the target
as the paper would allow. He then felt
sure of half the cigara, and already, in
imagination, was puffing the fragrant
weed, and laughing ha his sleeve over
the sharp trick and excellent joke he had
played the "other boys." But, alas!
the joke was soon turned, and visions of
a cob pipe floated before his astonished
eyes. The gun was flred, and a stray
shot knocked the center out of George's
mark. Eighteen man atepped up and
said : " I'D take my half now." Leflia
thus found himself booked for SBOO
worth of eigan. He compromised, how
ever, after some wrangling, bfr dmdiug
the cigara equally among his partners.—
Jkrw (Ikae.) TntdKgmair