The Centre reporter. (Centre Hall, Pa.) 1871-1940, February 23, 1872, Image 1

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    Tk Hidden Jay.
Through leafy by-oatha, sheltered and apwit.
Whistling the carol of a hcai t.
In idle gtadacae strolled a truant tuj.
Up in a tree-top swayed a MM* Mr 4
An<l sane and sang. nor eared if any hoard
Hia solitary roundelay of Joy.
A brook flowed through the sllswes of a wood ;
Sons* gorgeous flowwra upon ito margin stood,
And waned thoir scarlet banners of delight.
From evening's dusky blue shone out a star.
And through the daianeoo trailed ita splendor
Though all the world waa buried in the night.
Jay ask* no seeing eye, nor listening ear ;
Put enrols, blooms, and ahtnee when none Is
t>uly becanne it Seal# ao fully Meat.
The mated bird flies not on open wing,
Pitt sing* from out the bough and eo 1 ting
The happy aecret hidden in tnv breaat.
Cold!— Bitterly I'elJ.
CeW '—bitterly eokt I
The moon is bright,
And the snow i* white,
beautiful to heboid;
bat the wind is howling.
Like hungry, prowling
Wolvva on the wintry *ot 1— ,
Coid i—bitieny ooM 1
H; shawl is ragged and old.
The hearth deserted and dark,
GU Idcned by never a spark..
And my only light
Is the pitiless while
Of the moonbeam'* chiU.
bi.Verx chill.
Cruelly--splendidly bright—
Cold !—bitterly cold.
llabe, more precious tlian geld,
li st, tittle one, rent!
bleep, my own one.
Clasped to thy mother'* breast.
Though thin and wsurted her fortu.
Her am* shall eufold.
And shield the*' Brum cold ;
Tor the love iu her br-. *t is wartu.
Though the chill uight bresae ;
May the life-blood freese
Cold i—bitterly cold 1
Cold t—bitterly cold!
My * arc dim,
And my sense* wim,
I am prematurely old!
l\*xlkess and tireless,
Almost aturvless, .
Wrapt ui ngweo scanty ami thin,
filth bones that stare through the colorless
Weary aud wora.
Tattered and torn.
If I should wish I had ne'er been bora.
Tell me, is it a sin *
Cold world—Us tier! j cold!
Afternoon in Febrnarj.
The day is ending.
The raght is dascvndinx ;
The msrsh is troaeJi.
The new dead
Through cwnda like ashes
The red sun dashes
On village windows
That ghsntrer ml.
The snow recommence*,
The buried It OCeS
Mark no onger
The road o r tha f Uui;
While through the meadows,
l~k* {earful shadows,
Slosly jusses
A funeral train.
The bell is pealing.
And every feeling
Within ine responds
To the dismal kneß ;
Shadows are trading.
My hi art ta bewailing
Aud tolling withiu.
Like a funeral bell.
Th mists of the morning still hung
heavily on the mountain-top above the
village of Redcliff, bnt the roads which
led toward it were crowded with the
vtried population of the surrounding coun
try from tar and near. At Aylesbury the
shops were closed; the hammer of the
blacksmith lay npon its anvil; not a wagon
- A,* any description was to be seen iu the
street; and even the bar of the tavern was
locked, and the key gone with iu pro
prietor toward the cliff, as a token of an
important era which was without a par
' allel in the annals of the place. And save
here and there a solitary bead looking
through a broken pane in some closed up
house, with tn air of sad disappointment;
or die cries of a little nursling were heard,
betokeuing that in the general flight, it
had beer, left in nnskilltul hands; or.
mayhap, here and there a solitary, ragged
■nd ill-natured school-boy was seen, or a
not less solitary and ill-natured dog. either
seeming but half appeased by the privilege
*fa ho3iday, granted on condition of stay
ing at home—the whole village exhibited
a picture of desertion and silence which
hid been nn known before.
But in proportion as you drew nearer
die ponderous cliffs, in the midst of which
the little town of Itedciiff was situated,
yon mingled again in the duck bustle aud
motion of the world, of men. and women,
and boys, and horses, and dogs, and all
living, moving, and creeping things that
inhabit the wild districts of Pennsylvania.
The village itself was crowded to over
flowing long before the snn had gained a
sufficient altitude to throw its rays upon
the deep valley, in which it lay. There
the bar of an inn was crowded, and the
fumes of tobacco and whisky, the jingling
of small change, and the perpetual clamor
of the throng, were sufficient to rack n
brain of common flexibility. In the streets,
there was a greeting of old and long-parted
acquaintances; the bartering of horses;
the settling of old accounts ; the buffoonery
of half in toxicaU-d men; the clatter of
women; the crying and hallooing of chil
dren and boys, and the barking and quar
reling of stranger dogs.
To look upon the scene, to mingle
with the crowd, to listen to the conversa
tion, or to snrvey the countenances of the
assembled multitude, led to no satisfactory
solution of the cause for which this mass
of heterogeneous matter was congregated.
Within the walls of the old ttonejail.
at the foot of the mountain, a different
scene had been that morning witnessed.
There chained to a stake in the miserable
dnngeon, damp, and scarcely illuminated
by one ray of light, now lay the emaciated
form of one whose final doom seemed near
at hand. A few hours before, his wife and
little daughter had traveled a hundred
miles to meet him once more on the thres
hold of the grave; they met, and from that
gloomy vault the hymn ascended with the
amending sun; and the jailer, as he listen
ed to the melodious voices of three persons
whom he looked upon as the most desolate
ami lost of all in the wide world, almost
doubted the evidence of his senses, and
stood in fixed astonishment at the massive
door. Could these be the voices of a mur
derer. and a murderer's wife and child ?
This brief, and to be final interview, had
Eassed, however; those unfortunate ones
ad loudly commended each other to the
keeping of their heavenly Parent, and
parted; he to face the assembled multi
tude on the scaffold, and they, as they said,
Jto return by weary journey* to their sor
rowful home. The convict, worn out with
sickness and watching, now slept soundly.
His name was Jason Creel, his plnre of
residence said to be in Virginia. He had
been taken up while traveling from the
northward to his home, and tried and con
victed at a country town some miles dis
tant, for the murder of a traveler, who had
borne hint company from the Lakes, and
was ascertained to have a large sum of
money with him, and who was found in
the room in which they both slept at a
country inn, near Kedcliff, with his throat
Creel had always protested his innocence,
declaring that the deed was perpetrated
by some one while he was asleep; but the
circumstances were against him; and al
though the money was not found on him,
he was sentenced to be hanged, and had
been removed to the old stone jail at Red
cliff for security, the county jail being
deemed unsafe. This was the day the ex
ecution was to take place; the scaffold
waa already erected; the crowd pressed
round the building, and frequent cries of
'•Bring out the murderer!" were heard.
The sun at last told the hour of eleven,
and there could be no more delay; the
convict's cell was entered by the officers
in attendance, who aroused him with the
imfonnation that all was ready for him
without, and bade liirn hasten to his exe
cution; they laid hands npon him, and
pinioned him tight, while he looked up to
ward heaven in wild astonishment, as one
new born, and only said : " The dream—
the dream I"
"What dream, Mr. J&sonf" said the
sheriff. " You would do me a great kind
ness, if you would dream yourself and me
out of this disagreeable business,"
FREO, KURTZ, Ktlitor Aml Proprietor,
"1 draaitm),'' replied thawnvict, "that
while you road the death warrant to ute
on the scaffold, a tuan came through the
crowd, and stood before u*> in a gray dress,
with a white hat and large whisker*, and
that a bird fluttered over him, and *ang
distinctly: " Title ta liowls, the murderer of
the traveler."
The officer* and jailer held a *horl con
sultation, which euded iu a determination
to look sharply after the man in grey w iih
while hat ; accompanied with many hint*
of the resignation of the prisoner, and the
possibility of'his innocence being asserted
t>y a supernatural agency. The prison
doors were cleared ; and t'reel, pale and
feeble, with a hymn-book in hi* hand, am)
a mien all meekne** ami humility, u
*een ttteiing from the prison to the scaf
fold. He had no aooner ascended it, than
his eyes began to wander over the v**t
concourse of jnfoplo around hiui, with a
scrutiny that seemed like faith in dreams;
and while the shnritf read the warrant,
the convict's anxiety appeared to increase ;
he looked, and look again; then raised
his hand* and eye* a moment to the clear
sky, as if breathing a last ejaculation,
w hen, lo! as he resumed his tirsl position,
the very person he described stood with
in six feet of the ladder!
The prisoner's aye caught thought, and
flashed with fire while he called out:
"There is Lewis the murderer of the trav
eler!" and the jailer at the same moment
seited the stranger b.T the eolUr. At firri
he attempted to escajte; hut Iteiiij! secures!,
and taken before the magistrates, he con
fessed the deed, detailed all the particu
lars. delivered up part of the money, in
formed where another part was hidden,
and was tully committed for trial—while
Creel was set at liberty, and hastened,
like a man out of his senses, from the
Three days had elapsed; (.'reel had
vauished immediately alter his liberation,
vrhen the pretended Lewis astonished and
coniouniled the magistrates by declaring
Creel to be her husband ; that sbe had
concealed the disguise, and performed the
whole part by his direction; that he hat.
given her the money; which he had sue
ceeofully concealed; and that the whole
from the prison to the scaffold scene, was
a contrivance to effect his escape, w Inch
having effected, she was regardless of
con sequences. Nothing could be done
with her—she was set at liberty, and
neither she nor her husband was heard of
How A Newspaper Was Started,
Years ago, an educated, but rather fast
young Knglishman, having run through
all his ready money by a long course of
fashionable dissipation in the chief cities
of the continent, found himself one day in
Paris with liis means of livelihood nearly
exhausted, and credit ertirely gone. This
state of things—almost face to face with
want—set him to reflecting seriously, for
the first time in several years. "Some
thing must be done," mused he, "and that
right quickly." "Bread and butter mnt
be had, and there is no money in my
trowrers wherewith to get it; or, at best,
ouly sufficient to last, witli economy, three
or four days longer; and, theu what!
Being naturally shrewd, of an inventive
turn of mind, and a very ready iuk-sltngist,
he quickly formed the determination of
turning these qualities to present account.
"Necessity is the mother of invention," it
is said. His resolution to strike out iu his
new course was no sooner taken than he
proceeded to put it into execution.
On-taking account of stock, our impe
cunious friend finds lie has just sufficient
funds on hand to settle up with his landlady
for his last lodgings, take him across the
channel to 1/mdon, and to insert au adver
tisement he had studied up and prepared,
three times in two daily papers of the city.
"And what was this curions advertise
ment (" very naturally asks the reader. It
simply called for five hundred newsboys
to sell a new daily paper about to start.
As their commission for doing this, they
were to receive an extra percentage, hut
as a guarantee tand here cornea ill the
joke), each boy to le employed must leave
with his employer just one pound sterling.
This condition was peremptorily insisted
on in every case. But the extra induce
ment had the desired effect—in fact it took
admirably, for hi less than a week the five
hundred boy*, or their friends for them,
had applied, registered their names, and
£5 ho sterling were duly deposited.
Mr. Smithson. our embryo journalist,
now set himself to work night and day to
get up a daily paper. Aside from a few
paying advertisements, and some shilling
notices, he himself wrote np the entire
contents of the little sheet, and on the day
the boys w'ere told to come for their
papers, the first number was ready. The
paper was no longer a myth, but a liviog
reality. little did those ragged urchins
or their friends snsperf. however, that the
whole thing was got up on their money!
The ventnre proved a great success: but,
on the other hand, had it been a failure—
then what? Ah! in that ease our friend
wonld suddenly have found it necessary
to resume his travels again, otherwise he
would have found himself ticketed ten
years, at least, to Bridewell.
From the first number of the paper the
enterprise rapidly grew and flourished;
the shoeless little fellows, who so now it
ingly furnished the capital to set up a
newspaper, soon had their money returned,
and none were the wiser, none the worse,
for the clever rate that had been played.
Thus was ushered into the world that
powerful institution, known to-dav all
over two hemispheres as the fxmdon Daily
TtUfrayK with correspondents in every
part of the globe, employing a corps of
writers and wielding sn influence second
only to the "Thunderer" itself. Mr. 8.,
the projector, died several years ago,
wealthy from theproceedaof an enterprise
begotten of sheer desperation, and. though
rash in its inception, yet highly successful
in its results.
pos of sensational exhibitions, says a Lon
don letter, it will be in your recollection
tliat an unfortunate lion-tamer named Mc-
Carthy waa torn to pieces a few weekß
ago at Rochdale, by the lions whom, poor
creature, he professed to have "tamed."
.No less a personage than loin King, the
retired pugilist, has come forward to beard
the lions in their den. but it in satisfactory
to be assured that his overtures have de
clined. 1 knew a lion-tamer who shook in
his shoes at the approach of his wife, and
yet that henpecked man not only put his
head in a lion's mouth, but, what is more
remarkable, he drew it out again. He
could bully a lion, but he would run in
a rathole from his wife. At last she
eloped with a Methodist parson, and the
poor lion tamer took her loss to heart so
much that he never again hail the pluck
to look a lion in the face. He caught the
jaundice, poor fellow ! and died at Green
wich in the flower of his youth and beau
tv. I never hear of a lion-tamer without
thinking of poor Jackson; but let us hope
that the race is now extinct.
CJUI-DREX. —Cross, crying, or suffering
children may be a heavy care to mothers,
but the care may be quickly changed to
remorseful grief if they administer " sleep
ing medicine" without proper medical ad
vice.' At Iluddersfield, England, two in
fants six weeks old were recently killed
by administering a mixture of opium and
aniseed, which had been recommended
to the mother by anotber woman. The
children were fretful, and the mother pre
pared the decoction. It was not long he
fore she was relieved of all her care of the
little twins, who died from the effects of
he opium.
The (tame of " Succotash."
Our voting folk* at home have lieeu
kept wide awake tnativ eveiiingw ly the
new gttmo of atiecotaah, Aa every \joy
and girl ought to kuow, mcretaali has two
parte —via.: bene* and corn. It ie best
in lcaruiug th ■ gauto to commence with
the tlrt t>art eoro-in tin.* way : All tlai
player* lwiug trateil.ouu begin* bv e>nt
iug one, hi* neat right hand neighbor
*ay* two, the neat three, and ao ou until
kciou 1* reached, but luatead of saving
.wren the player asya " ban*." Then
keep right oil eouuiing, each naming hia
proper number in turn, eight, uine, ten,
etc., until fourteen : but aay "beans"
instead of fourteen. Oo on again, saving
" Itoaus " instead of seventeen or twenty
one, or twenty seven. lu other word*,
the rale of the game i* : " lb- una "i* to
le said in*t<-:ul of seven or any multiple
or compound of seven. Of eourwe, when
aevci ty i* reached it will lie " be tun" all
the way through, with "lean*, beans,"
for seventy-seven. Win wo er fails to *y
'• beau* "in the right place, or says it at
u wrong uuutl>er, is out, and the oth
ers play on until all are out The counting
s coutiuued up to eighty-four, then be.
gin* at one again.
When "beans" are mastered, begiu
with " com." using it wherever nine oc
cur*, or any multiple or compound of
nine, and continue the couutiug up to
cue Luminal and eight.
Next try and mix them, for succotash ;
naming " bonus " and " corn " in all the
right places at the sevens, nines, cto. Be
sure and call out " sucvotnali * at twenty -
aeven. because it is multiple of nine nud
also a eompenudof seven ; at forty nine,
which is u multiple of seven find a oow
ponml of nine, uud at ruiy oilier number
where* these parte Uth occur as multi
pies or compounds. To play the game
lively, without mistakes, will require
quick thinking and careful speaking.
The game can be varied by using any
any other numbers, and those who have
had hart! work to remember the multi
plication table will find it a capital exer
cise to fix the figures in mind so that the)
will stay in their plaeoa. AgrirtUluriti
Goldsmith Maid's Time.
Among tin* decisions juvt promulgated
by the Board of Apjw-als of tin* American
Trotting Congress for their meeting held
in Providence, 11 1., on the 9th and 10th
of January, is that in Un* matter of S. D.
Bruce et. aL, for a decision respecting
the validity of the record of 2 17 claimed
to have been made by the hay marc
Goldsmith Maid on tiie Cold Spring
Track. *t Milwaukee, Wis., on the *>ihof
September, ltd. After viewing the cam*
at length, the Board derides ;
First—Tuat raid Cold Spring Cuurae,
on the day of said race, exceed*d a mde
in length, measured in the manner re
quired by article 19 in the by-law
Second—That said race was a public
race, within the scope and meouiug of
rule 42.
Third—That the official record of said
association present* uo protest or other
allegation cf any disqualification aa to
either hone ; aud that said record con
tains conclusive evidence that Goldsmith
Maid won said race in three bents, of
a Inch the time, as taken by the judge*
and projverly placed in the record of said
association, was severally 2 20 1-2. 2:17,
aud 2:20 1-4.
Fourth -That the proof is conclusive
that in each heat of said rare snid Gold
smith Maid trotted fairly and performed
a full mile.
Fifth- That the judges of snid race em
ployed the assistance of all necessary j**r
sons to enable them salve* to projierlv un
derstand and judge the race in nil its
parts ; aud tlut the knowledge whieh they
thus imwsas'd of the performance, and
the aforesaid decision of saiJ race which
they lrave recorded, were not ifi auy reas
onable sense invalidate*! in consequence
of xn interruption of their personal view
over a part of the course caused bv ob
jects occupying the range of their viaiou.
For tlieso reason* w<* cantirin the valid
ity of the record produced by aaid asso
ciation. which establishes that Golflsmtth
Maid, iu tin* second heat of said race,
trotted u mile iu 2:17.
Michigan otic" for an illustration of
practical Darwinian). Monkeys arc in
Unit region. hut they arc very sharp.
A Detroit siuldlcr owns one which usually
sits on the counter, and is no donht a
penuinc attraction. A countryman came
in one day. while the proprietor was in
the back room, and seeing a saddle that
suited him asked the priec. Monkey
said nothing. Customer said, " I'll give
you twenty dollars for it,'' hiring down
the uiouey, which monkey shored into
the drawer. Tlu man then took the
saddle, but monkey mounted him, tore
his hair, scratched his face, and made
the frightened rustic scream for dear
life. Proprietor rushed in and wanted
to know what the fuss wa*. "Fuss!"
said the customer, " fuss ! I bought a
saddle of your son, sitting there, and
when I went to take it he would not let
mo have it." The saddler apologised
for the monkey but denied the relation
ship.—Ro:hr*Ur Democrat nwl Chroniclt.
CATTI-E DISEASE. —A bill for the pre
vention of nlenro-pneumonia and other
contagious ais-ases among cuttle, intro
duced in the New Jersey Senate, provides
for the appointment of three commission
ers. with power to make all needfnl regu
lations for the quarantine, treatment and
euro of cattle exposed to or affected with
any disease whoso spread it is desirable
to prevent. The commissioners may,
when in their opinion necessary, kill and
bnry all infected cattle, and all owners
thereof are required, under heavy penal
ties, to notify the commissioners of that
faet. The nay of the commissioners is
fixed at eight dollars per day for each day
of actual service.
Hctii A BXAR.—A traveler was once
making a pedestrian tour of tlie Alps,
when suddenly, in a narrow path, he
came face to face with a large brown
hear. He drew a revolver and was about
to fire when, to his amazement, the bear
cried out, "Don't fire!" It turned out
that the pretended hear was a man em
ployed hy some guides, who sent him out
dressed in a bear skin when they had a
timid traveler to escort. At a precon
certed spot the hear would such upon
them; and when put to flight by the ex
ertions of the guides, the traveler never
failed to reward their courage and devo
tion by a handsome present, of which the
bear received a liberal share.
THECBOJ*.—The Department of Agri
culture report* that the following Htates
have gathered in crops better than the
average during the season that has just
closed. If the average crop be repre
sented by 100, then the large crops nro in
the following proportion : New Hamp
shire, 111 ; Massachusetts, 103 : Rhode
Island, 100; Connecticut, 105; New
Jersey, 102 ; Delaware, 108 ; Maryland,
103 ; Arkansas, 102 ; Missouri, 112;
Ohio, 104 ; Wisconsin, 108 ; Minnesota,
110; lowa, 114; Nebraska, 112; and
Kansas, 119. The total production of
which is about 7 per cent, less than last
John G. Saxe is responsible for the
following paraphrase from Martial:
Tour nose and your eyes your father gave, you
Tour mouth your grand&ire, and your mother
Tour flue expression; tell mo now, I pray,
Where, in the nam* of hcavan, you got you
Vaccination and DUeu.c,
The m *t tiiwrinnml vaooinatora. oh
tllO OHO liutltl, tttld thlMM' wll'l !iuv had
niixt (> do with tb# treatment of infan
tile ailments, uu tin' other, gre in lb"
belief l hut i* tot eoiHmuuicuble
by vaccination. Mr. M.usnui, an I -K"
hh plivaicion, MI th< |n*rfuruttuc of
mure than fifty thousand vaccinal iona,
'> hiw never tn-n other diaoasca commit -
DINIIHI with the vneeine dtweaae, not
doe* he tielieve in the popular ro|w>rt*
that tlittv are ao oommuaieatml." Mr.
Leea, wboao observation* were equally
extensive, hu borne similar testimony.
l>r. W. Jenuer, who in mi year* had
tome thirteeu thousand aiok adults anil
children under obaanmtion, state* " thai
in no case had lie reason to believe, or
even to suspect, that any unconstitutional
.unit hail la-en conveyed from one person
to another by vaccination." During a
|H-riod of aevenleen yean, lir. West
treated twantv-ai* thousand infanta and
children, with a like experience; atnl
Prof. l*ag#t, after an extensive familiarity
with the d'aeasea of ohiUlreu, iiprewei
the opinion Unit the worst which can be
charged upon vaccination i tliat, by
disturbing for a time the general health,
it may rarely give opportunity for the
external laanifeatation and complete evo
lution of some constitutional affection
which but for it might have reinaiued
rather longer latent.
Where every person in a community
has lieeti properly vaccinated, there is
little chance for small pox to obtain a
foothold ; aud it is also very certain that
the presence of the uc vaccina ted ia a
standing invitation t> the devtlopemeat
and spread of epidemic. The opponents
of vaccination, and a far larger Bomber
who from ignorance or careleaane** n.-g
--lect the precaution, thus become, so far
as the public health is cuius rned, a
•' dangerous alasa," which, like other
dangerous elamee, it is for the interest of
the *onini unity at large to remove.
Breach of l'romi.e Suit.
In tbe United States Circuit t'oiirt. of
New York, a declaration win filed by
Sadie E. Wilkinson vs. Mark. M. I'omo
rnv, who is known aa " Brick" Romeroy,
alleging a breach of promise of marriage
against the defendant.
The chief {Miiuta of the allegation* of
the bill are net out iu tbe subjoined
statement :
The plaintiff allege* that on the DOth
of May, 18ti6, the defendant, at New
Haven, Coun.,andat New York, solicited
her in marriage ; that (die is now unmar
ried ; and that in consideration of the
promise of tlie plaintiff that she would
marry the defendant when requested to
do so within a reasonable time, the de
fendant promised aud agreed to marry
her, hut has failed to do so, bav ing as
the declaration alleges, and in violation
of his promise, married another woman,
whose name is not known to tbe plaintiff,
who claim* ffci&.OOO damages.
It i* farther set n| in the bill that on
the Ist of January, ltft>t>. tle defendant,
being a married man and having u la wf til
wife, did at New Haven. Conn., pay
court to the pUiutiff in view of marriage,
am! held himself out then and there to
the plaintiff aa a single, nnmarried man,
capable of contracting a legal marriage
with Misa Wilkinson, and undertook to
marry her within a reasonable time when
requested to do so. The lady states thai
she did entertain the i >licitationa of
Pomeroy to marry h-r. not knowing that
he wa not sole und incapable of eoutroot •
iug a Liwfn! nnion with tier. Slip allege <
that the defendant waa, in fact, married
and had a lawful wife alive, which fact,
■he MVS, the ib-fe • dant knew. F'or these
reasons, she stab**, she has been hurt in
her good name and reputation, and pro
vented from rei*eiving the attentions of
other men in view of marring -, having
remained single up to the present time.
About (hildrcn.
l>r. t). W. Holme*, iu the February
A tin* tic, thus dianmraes about children :
The Old Master, who ia a bachelor, has
a kindly foiling for this little monkey,
and those of his kind.
•' I like children," he said to me one
day at table. " I like 'em, and 1 respect
'em. l'rotiy much all the honest tmth
telling there is in the world is done by
them. I>o you know they play the pari
in tbe household which the king's jester,
wno very often had n mighty loug lesd
under hi* cap and bells, used to play for
a monarch ? Thorn's no radical club
like a nest of little folks in a nursery.
Did vou ever watch a baby's finger* ?
I have, often enough, though T never
knew what it was to own one." The
master paused half a minute or so. sigh
ed—perhaps at thinking what he had
missed in fife, —looking up at me n little
vacantly. 1 saw what was the matter ;
he had lost the thread of his talk.
" Baby's II ager*," I interpolated.
" Yea. yea ; did you ever see how tlioy
will poke those wonderful little fingers
of theirs into pvery fold and crock and
crevice they can get at ? That is flu ir
first education, finding their wax into the
aolid facta of the material world. When
they begiu to talk, it is the same thing
over and over again in another shape.
If there is a crack or n flaw in your an
swer to their confounded shoulder-hit
ting questions, they wiil poke and poke
until they have got it gaping, just as the
baby's fingers have made a rent out of
that ntom of a hole in liia pinafore that
your old eyes never took notice of. Then
iliev make such fools of us by copying
on a small scale what we do in the grand
THE PAKTMDOK.— At a meeting of hor
ticulturist* in Illinois string ground was
taken against the destruction <>f tln-ae
birds. To show how useful this bird is
it H stated tlmt n flock of partridges
were wen running along tho rows of
corn just sprouting, nnd seeing them
engaged m something which was believed
to !<• pulling up the young plants, one
of them was killed and its "crop" exam
ined, which was found to contain one
cutworm, twenty-one stri]ed hugs, and
over one hundred chinch bugs. Another
member related that he had adopted
measure* to protect the bird, and that
they had become so numerous and so
tame that hundreds of them, after snow
falls, conld be seen in his barnyard with
the fowls where they were fed. As s
remit of their presence upon his prem
ises his wheat crops were unusually
abundant, while in many other places
not far off the chinch bug and other
insects had destroyed half the crop.
tell ft good story of Brigham Young.
Among the np|licants for the special priv
ilege of taking a second wife, there came,
one day, a brother of unusually doubtful
character, a drunkard anil a rascal gener
ally, when something like tho following
dialogue ensued : "Bo you want another
wife, do you t" 14 Yes, it you please, Broth
er Brigham." " Well, the short of the
matter is, that you enn't have one."
44 Why can't 1 have one as well as the oth
er snintst" 44 So you want to know the
whole story, do yon ?" 44 Yes ; 1 should
TTko to know why I can't have more than
one wife, as well as the rest of 'em."
44 Well, you shall know, then, in nhort or
der. I want your race to die out."
Mayor of Salem, Mass., gets sixteen,
hundred dollars a year for his services,
which he contends is too much, and he
has applied to the Common Council to
have it reduced to eight hundred.
What can Hotter lie,
llif ehilil stui the "Id ttinn ul slime
lu the qua I peaceful shade
i)f the "id green l ii;h iksl hsd rlcliljr grown
In the lit <>ti, thick foroal glade.
It was * soli suit uU-sssul s<<uud,
That nut hag •-f tin k.
tint ttie g. lilt, till OS* played lightly rouud,
A a lliUa ihu fair buy ajole :
" Dear lather, what can honor be,
Of wtiH h 1 ni-ar wen rave?
11< l.t, cell ami cloister, lainl ami >-,
I'he l<u|t ,i and tie- nave;
It lives IU ail, lis sought in each,
*iia never heard r seen :
V w tell me, father, I beseech.
What ran this honor mean I '
" It is a name -a nauir, njr child.
It 111 I-d 111 I lli I da) a,
tV hen men wore rude, their paaainiui wild,
I heir spirt, thick hatlle fiaya.
When in arm -r kriibl, the warrior hold
Knelt to hia lad* a eyes;
11. 'iiealh the abbe* paveni.-iit old,
That warrior's dust now lies.
" The iron hearts of that old day
Have mouldered In the grave ;
And chivalry has passed away,
. \\ ith knights so true aud brave ;
The honor which t them waa life,
throbs in no hosotu now ;
ft old* gild* the gambler's strife,
Or desks the worthless vow."
Mr. Whiffles—the respected pait-nt of
otur hero. Mr. Adolpboa Whiffle- was an
opulent Berkshire fanner, who, before re
tiring from bis business aud leaving it to
his son, fancied that a visit to the mtt
metropolis would have the effect of sharp
etiing the wit* ol that amiable youth, an
opcratioo of which that voting gentleman
st. MM! greatly in need. Tim sou jumped at
the idea, especially when he learned that
he was to set out on his travels alone.
With the parental blessing and hia purse
well filled, Mr. Whiffle*, junior, duly ar
rivrd in Loudon awl installed himself in
economical quarter* in Savoy street,
The theatre*, ol course, occupied a large
share of Mr. Whiffles' attention during
hi* stay in London, and tbe neighborhood
of *tag"~d.<or afforded him a vast amount
of satisfaction. Tbe sight of " proles
sioiials " in their everyday cost nine was
to huu tbe rouive of great gratification,
and in* delitht when he made the acquaint
ance of a prominent member ol the or
chestra of the Royal Hash Theatre ex
ceeded all bound*. He vowed eternal
frtendshipjfor him on the spot, and there
and then ratified the agreetncot by enter
taining his new aequaiutati-e at a nWkereke
supper at the Albion. Our story opena
when Mr. Whiffles and hi* frietnl- O'Leary
by name—had Ken almost inseparable*
for the space cf six weeks. Mith pain
Mr. Whiffle* bad lately observed an ex
prei n of settled melancholy on Mr.
O'LraryVs ex|>rrMive countenaoce, ami had
resolutely dctermin.-d to cbvine the
•• You are ill f " said our hero one eve
ning, after tbey had supped at tbe hos
telry limit inentMtnd. and wrcir quifh.ig
vasiciis •• w hfaskey* hot " to promote di
gest ion.
Mr. O'lxxry sighed, shook hi* head
sadly, aud cmpti.d hi* byway of
•• Your supper ha* disagreed with vou—
you have eaten too much," continued Mr.
Whiffles, tender! v.
'•lt isn't the supper t hat worrie* me,"
oh.rrvcd ins rompanion; ''it's the substi
This mysterious answer pouted Mr.
Whiffle*. He thought it over seriously,
then gave it up in dropatr, snd demanded
sn explanation. Mr. o'l-earv vigorously
putt-. ! at hi* cigar, and then proceeded to
enlighten Mr. Win flics.
It spjK-arvd frotu Mr. O'Leanr's account
that it * customary in the Royal IMI
Theatre (or the management to allow va
rioo* members of the orchestra to a'went
them-dves from time to time from their
posts in order to attend roneerta or other
entertainments, on the condition that they
provided clficteut substitutes to fulfil tteir
ordinary duties. A* a rule, throe substi
tute* were not hard to find; but Mr.
O'fx-arv confessed, with tears In hia eyes,
that although he hail searched high and
low, for some unaccountable reason
be could find no one able or willing to
supply hi* place at the theatre while he
was absent to fulfil a most jrofitable en
gagement hi had accepted to play at a
fashionable West Find concert the ensiling
evening. Without a moment's hesitation
Mr. Whiffles threw himself into the
breach and proffered hi* services.
• Stuff!" replied Mr. O'Lcarv, "what
do yoa know about music ? "
Mr. Whiffle* couldn't tell. 110 was
quite certain about what be didn't know,
but that he refrained from mentioning.
There was a painful pause. Mr. O'Leary
stuoked aileutly on for some Mine, now
and then darting a searching glance upon
tbe anxious face of Mr. Whiffles, a h he
were revolritig some gnat scheme in the
innermost recesses of his own mind, but
a* yet scarcely saw the manner in which
it could lc carried out. Suddenly—" 1
have it. Thanks, Whiffles, *ny boy. I
accept your generous offer. You shall be
ray substitute." said Mr. ()'l<eary.
To *ay that Mr. Whiffles was delighted
would but feebly express the state cf his
mind. He grasped Ml. O'Leary'* hand
and shook it fervently. He trembled al
ready with excitement. Hia proudest
hopes were about to he ivalixed. He
would be admitted behind the scenes of a
theatre. Word* failed to ronvay any
idea of his feeling*, n* ho lnt a willing
ear to Mr. 0 liearjr, who proceeded to give
him the necessary instructions.
In the first place, Mr. O'Leary pointed
out that there were two trombone-play era
in the orchestra of the Royal Hash Thea
tre, he himself bring one, and that for
the especial guidance or Mr. Whiffles, lie
would summarily state the case as fol
lows, premising that after the rise of the
curtain on the first piere, a performance
u|Min the two trombone* heralded the ap
proach ol the vfllam of the piece.
Further, his (o'l/cary'a) experience in
duced hitn to believe that in a crowded
assembly one trombone would probably
make as much nnic as two; and that ail
Mr. Whiffles had to do, iffter announcing
himself as Mr. O'lyeary's substitute,
would he to take his cat leisurely in tbe
orchestra, and, when the curtain rose,
ratt-fully watch the proceedings of the
oilier trombone-player, and imitate his
every movement; so that, in reality, one
trombone would make all the noise, al
though, apparently, two were being
played. Lastly, he advised Mr. Whiffle*
to fie careful what he was about, as the
leader was a !
Soon afterwards the friends left the
Albion and proceeded on their several
ways—Whiffles already more than half
repenting hia rashness in embarking iu (he
The sombre shades of twilight were
enwrapping, as with a shroud, the streets
of Ijondon, when, carrying Mr. O'Leary'a
trombone in hia hand, Mr. Whiffle* might
have lieen observed woefully picking nis
way through the purlieus of Brury I.ane,
endeavoring to find the stage entrance of
the Royal Hash Theatre. Two or three
sallow-raced gentlemen were smoking short
pipes at the entrance, and occasionally a
lady or gentleman passed hurriedly in,
evidently under tbe impression that they
were behind their time, but a glanre at
tbe clock in the hall seemed to reassure
them, as they made their way more leis
urely towards their respective d teasing
room*. Upon reference to his watcb, Mr.
Whiffles found that the doors had only
just been opened, and he therefore had
*ome leisure to look about bim. He loit
ctcd at the door lor some time, wonder
ing, as the various members of the com
pany made their appearance, who this one
waa, and who that one could possibly be.
until a small hut uncotniwuly sharp bor
plucked him by the slctve and said—
I '■ You'd better tuakc lusis—ibsj'ni gotug
to ring in.'
.Mr. AYhtflb-a then became aware that
he was nlro<<*t entirely abme. Without
Laving the laiutest Idea of the meaning of
•' ringing in," be mechanically followed the
small boy dowu a glootnv passage, tumbled
down a bur Msj*, |>tcked Utttrlf up and
found honself upun the .lage. ll* had
hardly time to r*l a hurried glance upon
the nut el, not to aay dreary objects by
which he was eurrotiudcd, when an elderly
indit idual, in awhile Lean!, ami wb use
, shirt-front appeared to be plentilully be
sprinkled with anuf!, beckoned the boy.
" Tom." aaid be, " go to the music-room
sod ak Mr. levajoy for uiy copy of -UJd
King Cols.'"
The boy at once complied. Rightly
conjecturing that the music-room was the
place wherein the musician* assembled
previous to making their appeal anee in
the orchestra, Mr. Whi flies billowed the
hoy down a score or ao of rickety stairs,
to the great detriment ol he* shin*, into a
wantily furnished *| ailment, situated
immediately beneath the stage, wherein
he found reran! gentlemen rumnuaedly
tuuing t heir iuetiuiuml*. Uiaai heaimg
Mr. Ixvejuy, the leader, addressed by
name, Mr. Whiflb• neivously introduced
himself a* Mr. OTycarv'* substitute.
'• Very good," said Mr. l/irejoy, "be 1 *
told you cvcrvthing, I up|sise 1
darted a lane* iotu even corntr
of tin? apaiitnrut, in search of lii other
Ironiuor. Horror! Ht *#'( ikrrt!
The man upon whom k* toMy
absent! IT hat u to tie done 1 K*trr*t
was out of the question ; as, while be was
roiitt-iu plating tits lit, a suiail LM.II sounded,
aud the musician* proceeded to take their
place* tu tlie orchestra. Mr. Whiffles,
still beating the fatal trombone, despair
ingly tollotted, and, err long, found him
self in tbe presence of the Brit nth public.
The novelty of bia situation so mufuwd
I him that be, for a moment. M-ateJ hitmell
in tbe chair U-longing to Mr. lowjuf, and
it received with a prodigious outburst
of enthusiasm, the audience up|<*ing him
to be the talented Leader bitnaell. Thr*
mistake waa aooo rectified by tbe appear
we* of the veritableleader, who muttered
something under lit* breath by no mean*
complimentary to our hero, and motioned
him angrilv to the aeat usually occupied
by Mr. O'fcary. Tbe aadVuee, peroeh ing
the mistake, exptr**ad tbcjr opinion u!
Mr. Whiffle* in candid and uunrotakabte
term* aa be ruefully made bis way to tbe
i spot indicated by the conductor. Alter
trying to reduce*to something like order
! the aheet* of music on the *tand befbrv
him. Mr. Whiffles gained sufficient com age
|to look around him. Tbe bouse ana
packed from Boor to ceiliug—every body
waa on tbe ti|>toe of expectation, and sun
dry anxious voice* appertaining to iropa
tienl "god*" implored tbe musicians to
strike up at once, and api*-a*- their auxirty.
Again the small bell tinkled Mr. Love
joy tapped lib drok—raised his baton—
looked on each aide of him, and—slopped.
He whispered to tbe First Fiddle, and
then left Ins seal and the orehr-tra. Mr.
Whiffle* asked Li# next neigh I r what
tb might |*>rteud, aid was informed in
reply, that i'ufller, the other TromlKine,
hadn't a* vet put in an appearance
'•t'ouldn't ther do without bun T " asked
Mr. Whiffle -devoutly hoping in hw heart
of hearts thev couldn't.
"Certainly not," wa the reply
" Wouldu't tin* big drum do as well ?"
inquired Mr. Whlfflov
Hi* neighbor icgarded him with sonic
surprise, smiled, and continued:
"I>o without him! how can the*?!
Don't you know that you and he begin the {
moment the cur tain rises, to bring on <M
Ru*et, the heavr man I lie couldn't I
ounc on without bi tnuic, you know; a*
ho appcani at the luwk at first —then ;
aoMrt the mountain* fn>m right to left— j
then from left to right, ami finally comes j
down lett upon the stage, where be ex- J
pressr* a variety of emotions in panto
mime, and all to your music. 1 "
At thine wotds, Mr. Whiffles resigned
all hope, and was mentally calculating the |
dangers to which he would be exposed il ,
he leaped into the stall*, from thence to
the pit, and (might his way on out of the
theatre; when the leader returned, an'
ominous frown upon bis brow, followed by >
a short, fat. pile faced gentleman, apmr-1
enlly of foreign extraction, who carried a
trombone under his lett ana. Joy! Mr. j
Whiffles felt a man again. This, then,:
wa* Puffier! Mr. Whi tiles remembered
h instructions, and wattdied the new-!
comer attentively, who, upon hi* part, ap
pcxred to r gard him with the uttermost
concern. Mr. Whiffle# had occasion to j
shift his tmtnbone—Pufflor did likewise.!
i Mr. Whiffles felt for his handkerchiel—Mr. j
Pofflcr followed his example. All thaw j
•evnicd very mysterious.,and Mr. Whiffle*
was lost In wonderment when the overture
commenced. Luckily, the trombones were
i not wanted until the commencement of
the drama. The overture c®a*ed.
" Now, look out," observed Mr. Whif
fles* neighbor—"it's vou now."
Mr. Whiffles mechanically raised the
instrument u< his hps, keeping a steadlast
paxe the while upon the proceeding* of
Mr. I'nffler, who did hi* best to stare Mr.
Whifflcr out of countenance. Mr. Love
joy looker! round, and seeing the trombomw
lierfectly taady, awaited the rising of the
curtain. It was an agonising moment.
The silence was positively painful. <uc
might have heard a -pin drop. The small
bell was heard again. Mr. Ix>veioV tap
ped his desk, and the curtain slowly rose
—in ro/rwit rilmet! Mr. Lorrjoy began
beating the time slowly, and had even ac
complished a lew stroki* liclorc he realitcd
the fact. Turning round to ascertain the
meaning ol this extraordinary circum
stance, his surprise and bewilderment
may well be imagined at peirciviug the
two trombone-playees hard at work, dis
tending their cheeks to their utmost ca
pacity, nervously manipulating their in
stnimenta, and producing not a sound !
And the mot unaccountable thing was
thev never took their eyes off one anoth
er. Mr. Lovcjoy was transfixed with
•'This is very sraangc," thought Mr.
Whiffles,* 1 ' I wonder when that fellow is
going to begin !"
The little bell tinkled again and again.
Mr. Russet stepped npion the stage with
some amount of dignity, and left it without
any, under the impression that he was a
trifle too soon. The stage manager, a
gentleman of excitable temperament, and
much addicted to the use of psssionstei
language, who played one of the priucipal
parts in the piece, rushed from bi room,
discharged on the spot an inoffensive
"super"' who, unfortunately, happened to
cross his path at the time-went, half-a
doaen at a time, down the score ot a rick
ety stairs, at the imminent hazard of
breaking his neck, and, apjtesring at the
little door under the stage that led into
the orchestra, demanded in unmeasured
terms what the—very had word—Mr.
lxivejov meant by such conduct, and why
the—excessively rude observation—he
didn't go on? Mr. I.ovcjoy was too as
tounded too make a reply, lie could only
point in silent wonder to the two Trom
bone*. There they sat pulling and blow
ing rigorously, hut with no result. The
stage-manager gesticulated violently and
nearly had a tit. The audience, unable
to comprehend what was going on before
their eyes, hissed loudly ; and, Anally, the
curtain fell. Then, Mr. Lovejoy gave vent
to his feelings. lie leaped Imm his seat
and rushed towards Mr. Whiffles, who,
pointing with exhaustion after his unac
customed exertions, was wiping the per
spiration from bis (ace, wondering what
on earth was going to happen next. No
sooner, however, did he see the angry
Cotiilurlur uiondiv toward* him ttia,
wilb mi Uituitivu that wof
j iking uuplt-AMotl uh lmt to occur, to
mwlv a precipitate rub through the Utile
door uuJer tbc *tga, hotly pursued by
Mr. Dwreloy, wbor.ppt.'tundr mneiujrm*
[the foreign gentleman <j.i *riy aut->kjug
> sway, nad Ml upon bin tooth and Bail
flte ILK man (rruiletnau, Iwtni eliolciic,
, kitockwl Mr. down. Mr. I/>v*fo),
Itring by uo tarsus 'irli. iitit in, pluck, re*
Kaiitod the ix-rpmditulsr, and in the lan
guage id the Ilinic -let the foreign pro
tl. tuan'• have It." Tbat Individual nest
.cited the astonished Wtuflto sod en
■lwurfd to drag bin before Mr. Itek>r,
lin <>idtr tbat be aught undergo condign
punishment, when the hedge
•lipped ; tbrjr both Ml, and two trom
j boui-playn*' qivateriotedy dtvajijieered.
Tht-y uad fallen down an unused well
under tbe stage, Mr. Whiffles uuderanai.
There being but little water-they uuc
wxm extricated, and, furtunstely, im buttra
were broken.
Tbe tteu gentlemen, after a very excited
interview with tbe sts-ixinsnsger, were
shortly afterwards permitted to depart.
Mr. O'leary, next clay, was duly in
fortned of tbc dwaster, and leat l<u situa
tion. lit* PHM h<:. hib'll tbe uafcrfunst#
Puttier, who, it appeared upon inquiry,
waa really laboring under mat ervet* ln
dia|<Mit!u (hat threat:oed to confine him |
to bit tied; and, U-ittg naturally unwil
ling to lose lib aatary. he provided a eub>
•titute, like .Mr. Wbifito. utterly unable
to play, mud to wbuta be gave, in effect,
instruction* alipoit identical with those
gii.u by Mr. o'Lonry to our hero.
Mr. tViiflSea returned to the home of
hie ancestors a aadder and a wiser man.'
He haa never been In a theatre since, 1
and invar think* without a ahodder f
hia terrible advrnuate eonneclcd with
tbe Two Trombones.
Aormal Sehaol KMrriwt.
Iu the Richmond Konaal acbool a
(cw day* ago, the lesson a elocution was
tipou " Articulation," and varuma es
utupluw of difficult tnunriutiuu ew cited
aud practised, At the ch*e u/ the excr*
ciae, the principal called far wh exnui
-1)w to I* handed in a tbepupila might
;gov or le aide to find. The fußnving
nre anrue of tlie remits of the inrewtigw
tion. and ftrrmxh a rorr good collaetioO
<f pweU<v: ... •
•• A tmttf It* mtsU and raMrrt hwsla.
With Ui**t what* ana i<>utc*i ho sat*.
lie t!>rat* hi. fingrn apainat the ft at.
And *tiil tnai*ia be wen the ghost*."*
" Of all the Ml I ever *w saw, I*ed
>t MW a raw u as thia saw saw*."
" Up the hill ha hoavta a huge round
stone." , •
Cirri" Oraycroft caught a crate qf crick*
led erol'; a crate of crleklad oralis crazy
| C'raycoft caught If erase CYayeon
1 < aught a crate of trickled crab*; Where's
the crate of ctriekled eraha eraiy Oray
coft caught f i
"Thou wroalii'd'at and laujudd'st the
far*fteh'd us, and imprison >Ut him in
the vulcanic Mcxigau mountain of P-o-p
o-cat-a-peil in Co to-pas l""
•' Paler Pipe* rucked a peek of pickled
pepjtar*; a poA of psekled peppers
K-ter Piper picked. If P*er Piper
picked a pack of uirkled pepperr, wberC*j
the peck of |a<iklad {epj'rn Peter Piper
I picked r
" Thou vaft'd'at the rickety Aiff rer
' (be mountain-height cliffs, and clearly
Kiw'.t the fullorb'd moon."
"When a twister tvoting. amuK! twist
' him a taint, for twisting a twist * three
twist* he will twist, hot if one of the
i taut* untwists from the twist, die twist
untwisting, unt Wit fmm the taivt." . |
I " lUiln rt Howie* rpltrd a mmid roll
round ; a round roll RoUrt Rowley rol
led round, where roll'd the round jpou
Uolvrt Rowley rolled round V
"Theopbihi* Thiirtle, the Miccrmfa!
thistle-sifter. ir lifting a aievefwl of this-'
tie*, thrust three thousand thirties;
thmtaKi thotH. kwdth# thtinib." _ ]
"peter Praugle, the ptirkl* pear pick-1
er, poked three poekd of prickly
pranjdy pears from tlie prtekly pear
tree* on tlie pleasant prairies."
• "VHley Vite and rife vent a voyage to
Yindsor ami Voat Vnkhtun von Viteon
VtHlneaday." . , .
" Bandy-legged Banicbio kfnatacbie
WhiAkenfitHCU*, the hold hut bravo Rout*
hardino of Bagdad, helped AlmrQufcqtie
Itlne Beard. Ifcuhnw of Bclemkudeh, to
heart down an abominable Humble of
•' I MW KM* ki<* uff Sale.
The fact fa we aU tbras MW.
I MW EMS, he MW me.
And ate MW, I mw Etw."
A Big Idea.
I have a plan which, if adopted by the
stock growers of this territory, teul do
entirely away with the present laborious
and demoralising method of herding
stock, and also utilise a pieor of real es
tate that Uaa laid in the market for year*
without a bidder, ou account of itsbe
ing " put up" so high at the start, My
idea is this: Let all atock men in the
territory unite in raising a fund for the
erretioo of a suitable bmklingon the ton
of Pike's peak, having it connected with
the surrounding country liy a telcgkaph
wire; then supply it with proriwoiiK
etc., suflicicut to last one person at least
six months. In the early part of the
winter, a man keenly alive to the charms
of solitude, a rejected lover might do,
and provided with a telescope, should be
sent up theie, with order* to kick away
the ladder as aoon a* he reached the top.
Ho should be known as the "genend
cattle gaxcx and hcrdcr-in-chief M of Col
ore, hi.
Now, for the results: A haaw storm
coiriM on, and the hcr*U are liadlT acst
tered. Brown telegraphs up: " Sty eat
tie are gone; look for brand 'B." Her
der-iu chief replies: "can see fifty bead
of stock, brand 'B.,' down on the
Arkausas, forty miles below Puebla."
Higgia* aMida' up: "Mr old merino
i buck ha got mr awing your cl**s to
ward Cheyenne for him.' Cattle gtupef
rapliu: "Can't m*e kiiu; think IH> must
luiro lieou gobbled up at Denver.'" So
it would go; Whenever stock was lost
the owner eon Id ascertain at once in
what direction to look for it, thereby
faring a great deal of trouble, expense
and vexation of spirit
A word in regard to the salary of the
herder-iu-chtef. His recompense should
be ample. "No one to love; none to
caress, is, to draw it mild, rather—sbrue
what—iu ftfk well—" Vrsi know how 'tis
you rself.'' — If rgtrrn Paper.
Tun COST. —We have heard it stated,
says a New York pa]w>r, that a much
larger sum is spent daily In New York
for liqnpr Wiuuqr bmsL but the offieial
returns nre not ht hand to verify the
statement. But we do know, from daily
observation, that druukennosa is alarm
ingly on the increase, and that moder
ate driuking is becoming almost as com
mon as iu the early days of this nation,
before the custom was for a time over
come by the temperance movement It
l>ehooves the people to do something,
ami that quickly, to stay the tide which
j threatens to overwhelm the land.
The five lovers.of s Springfield (Mass.)
girl, each of whom she hod taught to
think was the favored one, discovering
that their love was u joint stock concern,
recently met at the house of the fair one,
and with one accord dropping on their
knees, offered her their hearts and hands.
The tableau was an efleotive fine, but the
young lady refused them one aud all.
EIGHT thonsind Spanish SOLDIERS H^RE
sailed from Cadis for Cuba.
TKRMBTwo Dollars a Year, in Advance.
NO. 8.
Kit IVrkina sa B Parmer.
Here w Artomu* Ward's letb*. where
be tella what lie kaowa about farming,
wad refer* to the faithful labors of Ell
Perkins. <m fin* fertn ft Maine ;
Hrw YORK, June 13, lhM. - To ik*
Pemuf C/*fi, (bmm AuliMh-Ormtlo
m~* r I liavo bean eli hoarte farmer for
solar four yean. My term ia. in the in
terior of Maine. Vntortwuto ly say
I iuda are eleven wile* from the railroad.
Klevoo uilhmlanuite a distance to haul
1 ntid oata; mi aa 1 tov'ttl any lb tool, j
jdo WIS, after all, suffer maeh on that *e
I Two yeaif ago I tnad shwp-i siring.
j J leiught fifty lambs, awl tnnied them
110 on my broad awl beautiful acuta.
It waa pleassiit OQ bright morning*
after coming turck from a lecturing tour
! to *1 roll leisurely ont on to the farm in
mydrMriug poem, vrith a cigar in my
moetii, and watch thoac innocent little
Wiabe aa ttoy danrvd gaily o'er the bill-
Md. j ,
One day, wy gentle shepherd, Mr. Kb
. lVrliaa, ?that was tan aard. "We must
have some shepherd dog*,"
I had no very precise idea aa to whai
i shepherd dogs were, lust I amuuMst a
rather profound look, and Mid'
| VWe must, Eli. I spoke to you about
thia some timq ago P
I wrote to Boston for tero shepherd
logs, and the dog* came forthwith..
They were splendid creatures - *ndtT-
I cfdorwd. bsael-eyed, long-tailed, aod
labaptdv jawed. ' i
We led them proudly to Use field*.
"Tarn them in, Hi," I aaid.
, Lii Qiyi in, t# 4
They wort in at once, and kflW twe*.
Sf of my lie*! houlr* ia about four min
tea and a half.
My friend bad made a trifling tuisUke
1 m tbe .reed of thews daga.
Eli Perkins wae astonished, mid ob
-1 served : '
" Waal I did yen *er ?"
I certainly never bad.
There were puola of blood on the green
sward, and fragments of wool and raw
iamb chop* '** round in con fa sod heaps.
The doga wt>uld have been aeM* to
Bostoo thai night, had they not rather
suddenly died that slUwaooo of a throal
dieteauper. It wasn't a aweding of the
'diroat It waant diphtheria. It wae a 1
violent opening of the throat, extending
from car to nr.
I Thua rinsed their ttfe-atorfea. This
ended their interesting tails.
I failed aa a raises of lamia. A# a
i sheapiat, I waa not a sueooaa.
I Last .Summer Air Perkinaaaid, "f tbink'
! we'd hotter cot some gxaaa this aaaaon,
i SIT- „ : , | J
We cut some graaa.
' To me the new mown hay la rrryavrcst
:iod nioe. New mown hoyia a realty fiot.,
thing. It 1$ good for mmu and beast
{• ■ We hired fosir boned iarmcrsto aniust 1
IMS sad I kd liusa ga4r to meadow*.
i I was going to mow, myself.
I Haw tbe sturdy peasants go round
<UMS stv I dipped m* flashing acyfihr 1
hfij|H9l9Vasw j
' "I tm here r
i -Then follow uaT I
liollofcd them. , , 4
FoTkmma Riem mtli'-r too closely, evi- j
lently, tor a white liaired old man,
j who muugdistefcr followed, Mr. IVskiws |
!<*aDd npou, us to halt Then in low
firm rotoe bf mid to hia son, who was
I Just ahead of me. M John, 'ehanre ptbeau
' wvth me. 1 hain't get long to live
i how. Yonder bmryia' ground WJU SO©#
I issve these rddhoues. and it's no niath*f 1
whether I'm oturied there with *me leg
, off iiud ter'ble gsehes in the other or ,
not 1 But ron, John—yn are young.'' i
The Aid man changed place* with hia '
' ou. A smila of calm resignatiou lit wp i
j bit wrinkled face, n be Mid, " Now, sir,,
II am reedy 1*
What mean TOW. old man f" I aaid,
i "1 mean tha't if you oontinner to
bran'ish that blade as you bare been 1
. brau'idiiu' it, you'll ala*?i out of aome
of na liefore we're a hour older P
There was some reason mingled with
> thia white-haired old peasant's profan
i iter. It was true that I had twice csrap
!cd mowing off has son's legs, aod hia
father ana perhaps naturally alarmed.
I woot and sat down under a tree. *T
: never know ! d a literary mania my life."
I overheard the okl tnaa say, " that
1 know'd snrthiag.** .}
Mr. IVikiny n not as valuable to me,
i tlris season a* I had fancied he might be
Every afternoon he disappeared from t
the field regularly, and remained about i
some two lioura lie aaid it was head- j
ache. Me inherited it from hi* mother.
Hia mother was often taken in that wag,
and suffered b great deal .1
At the end of lbs two hours Mr. Per j
i kins would rrnpiiear with his hcadmest
i ly dowe up ia a large wet rag, aod gay hs f
better." I
i One afternoon it no happened that f
i soon followed the invalid to the hcasse,
, and as I neaped the porch I heand a lt>
male voice energetically oliaervn. " You
stop r It was the of the hired
trirl, and she added. *TU holler fat Mr.
Brown V ' . ,
"Oil no. Nancv," I hoard the invalid
E. Perkins soothingly say, ** Mr. Brown
knows I lore you. Mr. B. >wu approves
at iL "
This was pleasant for Mr. Brown f
I pecfeed cautiously through the kitck
<>n-blinds. and, however unnatural it
may appear, the tip* of Eli Perkins and
my hired girt" were very near together."
Hkaeaul. ' Yo shan't do so." and h
db-wwa. She .also said she wowld get ]
right up and go .way. and as an evi
dence t'uat she was thoroughly in earnest 1
atiout it, she remained where she was.
They aie married now. and Mr. Per
kins is troubled no more with the head
This year we are planting corn. Mr.
Prckins writes me teal " on accounts
of no akare krows liein prtt up kfowa 1
esim and digged hist crop up lust MOII i
got author in. OUI llisbee who was j
Frade youd cut his sons leggs of Hes you :
bet go and stan up in feeld yraelf with j
draw in gowad oa k gesaea krows will j
keep way, this made lloys in store Wf,;
no More tcnlay from Yours respecful
"Eu Pttuxa"
P. S.— Eli ha* dbtie twtter since Tie gbt 1
married. •"> J" * "*■*(
A Body Heard.
The assaults and murders by rowdies i
iu New York are the sabject of burlesque, j
as well ns horror. One man says The
other night be had occasion to go half a
block to gat two coats worth of milk...
Ho has some influence, so Us ordered
out a guard, and proceeded in the lob
lowing order: > J
Band. , j
Company ofCavalry.
Company of Artillery. .
Cannon. Friend with rotlk pitcher. Cannon.
Company of Infantry.
Bear. ■
It does seem thnt in a civilized, well
regnlatod community, these precaution
ary measures would nave been sufficient
to prevent highway robbtry, but the
man suys that he was attacked, knocked
down, the pitcher broken, and the two
centa token from him, and no arrests
were made ; and this too, at 8 o'clock in
the morning.
THK heira of John Slld6ll have brought
suit to recover real estate in New Orleans
confiscated during the war,
a herd of nina ttt ttst huki tearinino; and
breaking iuto farm Work.
Tight Jaring caused s Isdy of Cosdflk
.la. N. Y., to biut a I'lodf ieuewl two
dsya aftot her mmikifk "
A gootleinun in Kentucky was recent
ly kiUod in a rtayfut senile for the sharp
fvoint m il' sd pewit psmcieuting his
At a trial in Wliheshsm the other day
it was testified that * win of coal one
foot ia mmm win yMil owe thoumnd
tons to the save.
• The ahtpMimndsabuss towubed at New
Oriewn* latoly. ha is laden with wine,
|to ripen .wtoah aha i to cruise is the
i tropica for a year.*
A dtmpfxrioted Danhury is
■aid, atteeaptod toahoot henwell and vu
, saved by a providentiai oocmrrence. The
pistol wa not loaded.
Hamst*blo County, ' Maas., received
tl.iffS lor dog liaensw last year, and
paid owl fmr.demsfff done |441 to ba
returned to tab towns.
Forty ytgrs ago nearly the whole of
Ohks waa a uvaae forest ; now a raaolu
ticul* mtmm b the Ohio Legiala
atom to eaoottagu th>* enltiration of
> m ■ 1 n
.y. The sheriff broke up* baptism mi the
fbttaka of the Ohio, at &, eeyiag that
Out water waa too cold, and that if tbe
minister persisted be would prosecute
hhn for T!i*rrd--r
: An (WgiiMto rim over a man at Manre
* eilla. fudtana. and the Jury, instead of
s betogiog' in 'the Mmveoteoaei verdict of
" nobody to bteme." hm actually found
, him guiuy of manrisufhtev
I Htoee Üb* December report of the Ag
rieulturul Department no information
. has be* received to ehs.ifc the esti
mate of the cotton crop, which waa at
thai time given aa 8,t00,000 baton.
The family of Mr. J. M. liiß, of ttote
' too, At . were taken aflaoWt the asm*
tuna, which proved to } the rwik of
oor.oMoned liy the tun of water
' running thmoah a toad pipe recently
'laid down. Ml <b
An.. old JflWtor *ys that the three most
uroflNhWiti** elieat - he ever had aye a
y mag woman who wanted to be married,
a married woman who'wanted a divorce,
and an old maid who didn't know what
she wanted.
A Meg WIJM pspe say th# "ffiri*
in thai city haa lt*u engaged to M a
taemtor'or every Fato gmduaiing daea
--e toil. <4ririjK i must tori a pretty
long time in thai pber, aod be of a fear
fully pmuisteut riAractefi
SA courpanT Of ebainnvker* ia Temple*
to, Mas*., are furnishing om aotution
Ito UteJbbqr ouestean. A party of work
men have saved a capital of dIO.OOO
tformwl a mtepraatfv* eaaapariv, a til
IrMht miff of thrir own.
There to* ciemiau lagw-beer aeltor in
New York, who hae aot liwto outside
! his phiee of bwtoMMi for eevwcul years,
i H hen grown no enonuMtriy riout from
beer and iadoh-nee that to could not
I pottitffy be got through the doorway.
T* iilr. Alan eon B. Farwell, a wcil-known
ritteto of Augusts, Me., has Iwcome in
i aane, and 'hat kmm cA to the Insane
, Hoejiikal. Tto particular form of hia
insanity ia the fancy that'be Is immeove-
Ihr urirto and ho gi**i chocks freely for
} giui.urjo to to anybody who
f" FUK'a brain weighed fffty-eiffht ounoea.
' Daniel Weheeerie weighed fifty thrau
ounce* to A*' .bgtf. Cnrier hd sixty
four ounces and a half, wliile Profeaaor
* Abc-er>>mM< poaaeoeed stxty-three.
i HaJli'flf. Cto nuNtor, wto M executed
■<'. k last spring, had fifty-nine
oiinoes of brain 0
* "Moines, lowa 'has a youthful Stm
iss B ot tvmnter yeuiu, who ahoaldet* an
icog Mil feetkmg.*fid walks
off a* thoogli it waa a pine pole, and will
•rtrito iuf irxA rod flnMßghto of aa inch
io diameter and two tot iouz nm his
1,871' *• *
M a werv sanaalionri leokmg story in
|on* of the morning napen ia true some
of the danghu-rs in New Brunswick. K.
J., have** very peculiar war of exhibit
ing thesv filial devobom. According lo
(ttoe.etery two dwghtem got their sire
I intoxicated wtffi rum and moisewa and
then aatentled hi* room with kerosene
and set it on fins. *fj| I
The tar*4ablof Ue new' Aw* Uaad
bridge weighs one hnadra d end fifty
tone. It h supposed to to the most
i massive piece of maehiirary of its kind
iia tho world. It is certain that nothing
in the Tine in this country approechcs it.
The principal circle. r>unpMed of six
segments weighing six ton* each, and
the base circle, are in their places.
" Cartaix Bcort."-4.t is said of that.
famous bnliter. Captain Scott, that when
to sighted s ooon in a two sfid was re
oognißoi by the ♦•erittar," -the saga
cious coon,, knowing that it was all up
with bits, would call out; "If that a
vewt. Captain Scott, don't lire, for Fli
came down. " The famous pevuon allnd
kd to was a* ofltoar in the nefnlar srmy,
who mac from the ranks —toying toe®
WAT at ltli He was wi illiterate, and
oould aot writ* biu own name. bet he
could make hi* murk withe lino or com
mon smoath-bore, flint loci: musket of
i the olden time*. ManyauacdW** were
told of him in the old army, .where he
#M universal favorite with the officer*
end men. He h*d for great many
. rn before the Mexican tear been cap
: tain in the Fifth Infantry, and hi* eom
-1 pane -were noted a* good ■oilmen. It
WM theboeat of kit men that itheir old
, captain could girk np % nd*t at any
time and oflTli&utl put a balK ts in
m ball Wye, oteffiafter the other, a* fast
,as he cooU load anil Are. Mh| own sol
diem, who idolised him. got up the story
1 abort the coon; which i correctly told
; show. This bnire officer was killed in
the battle of Molina del Key.
A XoVsx I* OKK CHATTE*.— One day
there was a great feast In a grfat house.
A wealth* young men kaat w giving a
dinner-party ©*• winter eventog. The
guests had just entered the dining-room,
*rhb soddcnlr a carriage drotw up to the
door, and the portals once mem opened
ad a reverberating knock. A tall, ele
gant girl presently entered the dming
room. Perhaps if nffie had been able to
, glance carefully at the faces of some of
those who were assembled, she would
have seen some slight marks of surprise.
, Nona was expressed ; dm ws< greeted
with fayor by the lady who did the hon
brs of the hohse, and had a seat next the
< host. Etw body was charmed with th#
beauty and grace of the fair apparetion.
The dinner was hardly finished when
• the visitant discovered that she had
made a mistake. She had come to the
wrong house. Tim right dUiner-party
was the vnqr door. Ike young
merchant had already fallen in love with
1 his gnest, and he wooed and whn her. I
tun not quite certain about thngletails of
the story —how site was alone and without
any friends but, for all that, the atory is
| true, and I trust I may be excused the
telling of it . _
I A HAJTT Co*irasrrr.—Hear the towns
of Washington and Palermo, ro Maine,
1 is* tooot ot land, AXI by 454 rods, known
as (lore, containing some
; fifteen farm-bousesT whose inhabitants
i belonging to no town or plantation, pay
j no Uses and cannot vote, flpd during
; the war were not annoyed by, the draft.
The origin of this happy lam! wad that
when the town line of Washington was
run out several poor families there,
and the town authorities left itout, fear
ing that they might-add to theflyianperß,
1 Palermo has never claimed it,sd it ha*
since Ixwome quite * settlero. afr and re
mains in perfect independence;
accident a number of persons seri
ously injured— some of them, iWs feared,
fatally—at Eagle Station, on the Louis
ville (Short Line Baiiroad. Just as the
train was entering the depot tip coup
lings broke and several of thee&w swept
scross the platform, mowing <mwn and
thus injuring several persons who were
awaiting the arrival c! the train.