i 'i
A.fl vi-tiinj Unit k.
l. I ni li.-hi'l Weekly at .
jlf isr.t nr., r i.vdBi.i ror.vrr, ivi..
TrelarveanH ss-P.M,. r!rPO
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r n.orih .........
1 year
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as
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6monl-.
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n. rt :
l'.'i.. !
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til Lie nf
tho cmis-.
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If J
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in
it IP the ..K .v frn" .(. ,!e-
those who don ? consult their
in Jvij-. , ex-
' ; ' a" I II If I t 'ii.w who
: -.i-T-. j--tj ui.u. .(.,t :r..m
1 1 . t I. 1 . ri- y..u . toj. ; t . i' sr.ip
f : too .-thert.
tr..in. and
: l.i. i
.. . - .- ... . . i.,"u . ie r line.
A. In ini-rat.T ml Kxecutor'f Notice. ..
A n.li'i.r'ii Not Ice.
Stt.t an.l ptmilar Notice.
-m- l. , ."
JAS. C. ' A3SON, Editor nnd Pjbilshar.
t SO
1.0
MK i , ifKiCKIAN WHOM THI TKtJTH HAKES FHKC, AND ALL ARB SLAV KB BK8IDK.
SI.50 and postage per year, in advamo
" ft prwwsiff. nr tKviarff.;i,
or .or,, 'i.end , . ,.. a, ,un,4 .,, .fr
VOIXMF, XIX.
.. . ,y j....r or r,,ir,j er i4iet
a.if hr 7-ai (or rft-erfuie-ne,.f
.'a I'tisriMi ot all aln.i. ti."."t
lua i inr, r.tt
KI.KNSBURG, PA., FRIDAY, JULY 24, 165.
NUMBER 24.
eutly executed at Scwe.t price.. I.otriy.u Uret
aci ej tn-dlt-
ill tfiMi' ircttitff
0
AN,
as, . - -tfT-. - i?z(. 4 -j i -a
for Infants and Children.
T..tT!:a.oircna4.-Ftocfcndmnthot I CastoHa ewa PoKc. CorjIpa?!on.
If - r.:::.r::.i it ajs-.'Frior lo.my prvscxiptioil I P"ur PtonuK-h, Piarrhcea, Kru-tAiitn, I
tacniV.-r-c." H. A. Jnora. M. D., I Kills Wrma, jivts sicep, and promote Cls-
111 Sc. OicM Et.. Lrockira, 5. T. WltCurtoua tt'loatloT.
Tm Csxtaub Copaxt, li Fulton fltrwt, IT. T.
fCAN
fhe BEST in the World
1
1 ir r. nr Jlesr. Vi bite IT dnTOtrd their lire
I th- !n'y of dnelopisir ths EskI Or,tB, tfa
liorfcat In; ciaaaraclared Ortaan for So ) tri.
'OSIT3VE
IURABLI
1 and will not got out of
Repair or Tune
i .v JM.VK YEARS.
.Ejr;r.gan ORGAN don't bo led Into pnrrhaslo?
OBC thni contains a great AURA Y Of STOPS
and i SW EEEI3 but tvrite o a
RELIABLE
DEALER
or 2f nmiruot irr
f'jrn'h yon at eTcn money a Jtrtt-clats
i iiAM. fT.-"" Stops cost but a faw cents each
Write f r O'jr CATALOGUE and diagram
v.-i:B construction of tha INTERIOR of
'WANS, SF.HT FREE TO ALL, nd
" 3ENT S DISCOUNT3 allowed whert wi
fe co Aeent.
Vilcox White Organ Co.
MERIDEN, CONN.
-r - - .
r-,r, I,.-f.
t . U i r :.y
. r.. (nit fr.i.a
. )? jtit.i: von', o c
' r-'-i r-.. At-.; t
. r r! jr-t" n-
. . i . .-:! M f T thr
t ; cur
i - iTr.il I c
:. r.-'i; l.rn iirportar.l
' 1. ,'.rc k.-jt Uriu
'Tit r.pwner. Tk ft
I i.r In: fiv l. -t it .
i ; lif Hcr wilii u n
- i ;. t :i' (, , c-i j
DECAY, l;
l ! 1 ' I'V :-
r'lcsti'in
fe--v-.r
t' i; i-.cr of f.t i:
'..tf. r.t a'y. The llU
i- I t . ""rrf thf hu
ts 1. ir.an r r-i:Tiiam la rr artortd.
t l.i. ....
V,
ti
5.AIff tr, v r.; h have her 3
igT; ; 1 "I rjpi'l vye:-,f t,. fi
Or. - Til-.t -h, - $j
IV- 3 ! nv.n. - C r
4"lr9 Jo'itiii. 7.i.
REf irsy co.. M'rQCKiwisra
j w n. h -.t.. r.T. r5ou. 120.
11! PTUED FEF?30N.S! Not a Truss.
" f rt ..-"lU.fo'irArplirjicfl.
r-CT GOOD NEWS
iiTd 12 LADIES
LiT Sv
Greatest inducements ,rer of-
fere.1. Now', jour tirca to sjtcp
ce!rf.r ocx celebrated Teui
aiMi i'oft eet.and wean a besuti
ful C'ml.l Bind otMom IVe China
-r-i i-y.
'I - Seu er (iandMTne Decemted
' r-.-.d M. Ro I':T.n-e S-l nrlln Rnd M.
'! f , t S-. Krr f -!! partloTilars ddr8a
TiiK t;r:EAT AMKHIf a te co,
F. o. box iu. il od J( V ee Bt.. Wew York.
fT
1 ' r l-.'-.i'.r i. t-iT" ,t. xt.d it is
jt L k aV
w i .' i,-ii. k I.I.I.
' i'lnii ;: ,t n.i nio,
-1:1. 1 "... .V . S.lt u:ii-d mi
ln-
: . 1 1 ar- .i.lliM:. It
i-.-.t t h f1MM, aVJI i
I - .-.. f.-m tr.c LI.--!.
: . 2- ve. 1 it rf i trial
-.: arij J"tir-TAni)r.flT
'..Jf t- r""M'iy, t 1
'.- . P-eeM il-.ii'..,
; r-.r..pt of J.
;I to i it Ly x-
,;- pi r, 't-r. f. r it
- . i i i.rfl. Smri
r f.-r k rr.-ir diTfrrt fnr
r -v. r.p- m itti ( nm
;4 -'.mi- nn1 f f atuhi-ntra
- -'sit'" tlCi-f ItlakOfl 111.
ollTr In !rnt"i-l
!- t i iN wf't, F. Kk.,! r.n A
: ai-itr .li-'vsT'ii, I 'H,f-
H, Vlli A CO., 1'uilaVl . PV
)ork Shavings
Trs x'- IT ! Mil ! . MM.M
i awa,!
fOtx MATTFlfSSE
tim ti.hirnc the n'lins in mat
o w i M ric mmend CORK SIIAV
'n 'he cbenpe-t (in(j mo,t durable
u,e.. 4(1 Ir.,. win fill a lre
- r AKMSTitoira mtoTitKR
"-r Wfi rf Jimllrond Street:
,
i v
t
f.
i-t.-i
7.
May ;,-St.
'ftLESHEH WANTED.
tODYL'"n maki Pbo
11 tipuiapns :v new
' dry plate procps
1 (ti 'a., will end post pe.iil UoChe'8
r ,r A f: - 11 rn, which civ' full in-
r"r nia!c!'z ti e pic'iirr-.
" i- fnrni-li fnn. $10 iipwttiris.
rnn rot;i:Ai'iiK; pum.etiv."
I "f. ' has. K. Chanuleis. lurnl
'' "'.al . pai In,, nt of t!i;. .Sei.iK.1
' I ii ntiU puliiiihed twice
T Oil U-
. I.I. I...
! pf r aiimiiii, ke rn Pln
iiinal mualHur. fullv
1 ; intj rnvi rt i nt, and mnwrrs all
" " v '" ti iLm-uItic" -tite.
" uti.-e fr.e
y- . r. wi iio.m a ri..
" lhoforahle A pp., an4 jiiterial.,
"'l m:oi)v.Y,
N1H i'dKK t'lTY.
- V- -,.'e.
e -.
' ata.ri,. v
Il
T ' ... i: -. ,,
. nenl' r. f.
".1 r w i ij
. e:
3 N
i Tnrnrtt, '. hct, tail f
he-a rUx li"fj3
... vinw i.iaui.-.n'l( tail'
.!(.r.,l!1.-,t
13
19 not in. i
', il 1 wpirr'.y attctiJeJ to. 32
! - nf it l l.nt a ui,t ir-if.. t
Cr3 tinn of tlio in. :nh. v. hi. h eon-rj the Luujrr
- then :m irtltniM u, w hen tlia cou-h rather 2
p .Iry, Iji .ili ".Jin r:,Iv, mora frejucut.tha
O chotks llili-dai.dc!til!-inoreton!inon. Thta
r:i;r :,.;..,. .-. , ... 23
... ... v . , ,,Ji5 . w. L, . , c. Tipiaiiin, orer-
Rie to ;i t.j r. ia .ve i l inni-hl.I lrrin. r
ltlonfnl ita.,p'l.,. i "1
r.-S t,. ti.u .,. ... .... ... . " D
, ijii.tjr ep.ii iuom lion.
ti.o .y-ti i,i. It la ilitati-a eipctoratlon.
It h;i'.3 tie ulcerated siuTacas
li. . tlio cr.iu.-h and muky, tl. 1 r -jtn--
v. Jt a ipr-jrlilh, tr,ui;ih and at thr
tino r..u-vj tli fertir. It is tr o I: um
-j ,7..... ; ... . ' ; ' , ' " "'SI
l.teatrntine f... :V.,jnt: heru."l.i iJ , j
never .lii - . . ; tli env-h. tut. .v r.ir..r. f'?
!-lC tlio c. .:. "in-..ie,itlv, wlie'i tl c.'irli
"3 ":"" "'iiKT'j'i. trn.t a Mies, i.n
I'sa pfiit:I i". ::i- full fliroctlnn. fr.
.cold iv;;rty wiikre.
! Df'tKt, JOnSOXilfF.n. rrop.,HBrI!inrfr,ii,Vt.
- aaintiii
Sold t.v V. S. H rker & r.r
Ml'onyl'urif
?iViNlU3' BLOCK,
EDENSRUf?C PA
CARL RIVINIUS,
Practical Watcbmater and Jeweler
HASalwayaon bn.nl a lame, rariert and ele
nt R5..rtmT.t nt WA1 I'll KS, VA k:KS
.1 KW KLRY. SPK TA( f,l S, K V K-(H, SSf.S
Sic, trh-ch be otters for salo at lower prices than
my ot her dealer In the county. Person needing
unvthlnir In hli line win do well.to gire him aea 1
before f nrchafllnir elsewhere.
-Af'ronjpt attention paid to rpn.rlnir Clolrfl
WateheK, Jewelry, fcc, and atislaction araarao
e?! in bo' h work n.l price.
aSr3
B
S7T
Ihe Oreatc-t .al 'ltiaijri cf tie Age!
C Y !V F-To Viy op A
TOKPED LIVER.
I.cjanf; jpri .re, riJ.v.;jco;titi), laia la
the. henif, T!t!j n !nll sensation la the
b.T.-k part, Tjin sudcr tbo sheaider
blade, Fnllrru nlte- eatlae. with adii.
In-liDHtion tn "3terti cf bsdrermkd,
Irtitmbiiity o'tpr.iicr, I.ovr apirits, with
m f". lirp cf b.-Ti 'z t)(c!cr;eiJ acme doty,
IVearine''.', Iizzinee, flattering at thai
ilert. DotQ ir-f.ira 1 he t;n, Itadirba
t;r tbc ri'-t C'-3, irrtlea-r.oii, with
utiV! iSler.nn, i '. ?h ly colored I rlue, and
"i t II S i'LLS avo especially adapted
a :c !i i-u-s, 0110 tloso ctTfcta 8':ch a
ct: l ie 'oifeoiit's i-ttrnior.!ahthenirrerer.
'. ' ey In.-rene tlia A pret Its, and rnnce tho
t " to Tak s ;i Klc itit'nn toe a-t.-ra la
ii ..ir'.ic.l, a' 1 hr'h.- rTonlc Aetloi on
th IllpHirf O-unt.T'rt ult Sttclf aro
Zr 1. V: . SJ.-.e. I !fiirrT Kt.,W.y.
res hm oye.
t-iAT HAirt or V.'siaKEHS cbnnged to a
Rt.osir Black by n ainele application of
th.i DTii. Jt mi pan a a natural color, acta
lri-fiintancouHly. sold by Draggiata, or
per t hv express on receiptor 91.
Office, rViurray St., Nw York.
The CHEAT JUMBO ENGINE
BOIIER COMEIVED.
Prire. J VZSr wpvnrd
Oieanest rlir tn
tbemarltet fordrl
Ira: Hirht mnehlne
rr. Jnat the thlnif
for Farmer' ne.
Ire rream Txalera,
I'Hntlnr T'rop.'ea.
Thre?h'- Machines
ic. Msnofact'irer
nf all klnd ft Ma
chinery A .lohblna;.
SenH for Catalogue
and Prtee It't.
II. P. KNKIN,
84. as fc as
Ibit Ave.,
AllKunKFT. Pa.
May Tl, ia.85.-lyr.
mm
PA1
Ot.'.iinod an -il' rATFXT nrslXsSnt
tf nde.l to for MOMMA TE FEES.
Our flipt1 ii oppn'-ite tli U .S Patent Of
fire, noil wi- oat. c'ltin 1'hIoh: jn 1 time
than ttioso rftpot fiom WASTTIXG TOX.
Snl MODEL Oil hliAWISH. H ei ad
vino as to pat. tit thjii'v frp ,,f rb. iret" : and
we make XOCIIAir.lE 1.' XL ESS PA TEXT
IS SECURED.
We r-fr, here, to the Pos'innter, the
Sunt, of Monev Ord-r I)iv.. and t offlrialt
of the IT. S. ltitit OfTic. For clroniar. ad
vice, terms nnd ref-f trees ti actual clients
In your (I'V n State or t-'outity, write to
C. ? . HXO W & CO.,
pp. ratrnt unit e, aslilnaton, D. .
THE COM PLETE HO H ErV?7
I tic elitiJrv Njw hin-i.rifcf.. N w ii:-.trTiijn
I trtji.i new iirsifjti,. Suit !y j!tt :i 07. -i.n.r .n-m prtztt.
A i I .t:i 1-' - ;i f . r ,t. 'ionnc htf
)r. I".f Hi I8KM-.. 1 he l.an-i.:.i ;l L.rTjCtuS
t-FAI'lKV (VltlS-'N.V Co.. 60 N''rth ith St. Philldcl-
p'i.a, la. A . -r i-i-i-il ii'w I. v Li Iibl-.
, i' VejetaHe Saba
N & I If
fee1: - ---3
3 jt. . r . ;
-vinci. !: i..?t
EM...?..
5
'T3
UTT5S i
mm-:t
W raaa- aam a f-i iM
A ClfAliMEI) HOWL
When the fevor peculiar to nr.t:i seizes
upon a new comer, said die friend who
told tue this story, it deals har liy with
liitrj. 'o it wa with me. I was just con
ations tL: t I wss t:ot lik?ly to lie, jet not.
strong er.ou.,1) to tliink of any of the niauy
rrepmntions I tdiould have made if my
Lours were numbered. I had stink into a
heavy, feverish half sleep, through v. iiich
I heard some one say : "He will ko off
like that.'' and was beginnim; to dream
without being a: tuely without conscious
ness of my surroundings, wlien the door of
our lou;r, low, whitewashed room opened
and a lady entered, hhe was a woman
with dr.vk eyes and golden hair and a
cream-v bite skin, lier dress was whito,
with a bit of blue about it somewhere.
She enrrit-d a bowl in her band. The
bowl was of thin, transparent china rarely
seen, painted with leaves nnd buds of
brilliant colors, and here and there a Kor
geous sort of butterfly. It was full of wa
ter, the purest and clearest that I over
saw.
' Are you thirsty f she asked as simply
as a mother inipht ak the question of her
child.
"Yes, madam,'' I answered, " and the
doctor will not let me drink."
" Hut I will," fhe said.
She put the bowl to my Hps; ere sho
withdrew it was empty.
"fiood nitiht nnd pleasant dreams," she
said, mid smiled and left me.
I slept then, sweetly, dreamles'dv, for I
know not how many hours. When I
awoke the fevt r was pone und I rapidly
recovered strength. One morning I said :
" I should like to thank that lady, for
she cured inn with her pretty bowl of
water.''
" There's been no woman here for
months," one of them said. "That was a
dream one of your fever dreams ; quinine,
did the business for you."
It was hard to convince me, but nt la-t
they proved to me thut at least they had
seen no woman : that no one vave me any
thing' to drink to their knowledge ; and I
began lo believe in ministering anuels. It
was as certain to me that I had s en this
fair, tall, dark eyed lady, with her blue
veined hands holding that curious china
bowl, as it was certain that I had been
ill.
However, many other matters eutrrossed
my thoughts. I ceaed at last to tell the
story, since the regular answer was that
in a fever one fancied ever thing; and
ten years fr m that time I was in Virginia,
in Prince I'd waul connty, not far from
the court house. I had been driving
with a friend, and we were riding past a
lino old mansion with a beautiful array of
llowers lu its garden, when a woman
walked "lowly down the bath and paused
to pick a ro-.-. Her figure was tail, her
hair gold-n. her eyes black. Her motions
w re it ef'ul. Willi a little exclamation
of astonishment I r.-cou n'..'.e l the lady of
my dream, if dream it were. She looked
a little older nny, a. good ten j ears older
but otherwise unaltered.
I know not in what words I communi
cated this fact to my friend, but I know I
ended by saying :
' I must speak to her. She will remem
ber. "
" She would think you a mailman." he
said. "Come on. You may get yourself
shot for staring at another man's wife.
They do those things promptly at the
eouth. I will find out who she is If you
like."
I assented eagerly. We rode on.
" Talk. to me , as much as you like, ' he
said, "but never expose yourself to
strangers. It is possible that this lady
was in Brazil in It., and brought you
something to drink when you were left
alone. In that case a doubt that troubles
yon will be satisfied. You can with all
propriety, cull on her and thank her."
But. though he spoke iu this way, I
knew he did not Imagine it could be so.
That evening we smoked our cigars iu
Col. L "s company and my friend dip
lomatically Introduced the subject.
"That beautiful house with tho large
garden," he said, "Is quite a feature of
thf place. Who owns it t"
"A lonely woman, widow of Mr. V ,"
said the colonel. "She was a belie in her
girlhood. She might still be ona if she
chose."
"Perhaps we saw her in the garden,"
said my friand, beginning a minute de
scription. "Exactly. It was no one else," said
the colonel.
My friend paused a moment and then
said :
"She reminded B of someone he
met in Brazil. In fact he almost believed
her the same person."
" No, no," said the old colonel. " Mrs.
V has never left Virginia. We have
known the family since she was 2 years
old. It is only the other day that we
spoke of that, and she lamented that she
had not traveled more."
I felt a pang of disappointment, but
found cournge to say : I should greatly
like to be Introduced to her."
The old colouel instantly offered to intro
duce me.
" But remember," said my friends, as
we parted, "never tell her of your fancy.
It would spoil your chance with her, and
I see it is a case of love at first slzht."
He was right, and I was very fortunate
very happy. I won the beautiful wo
man's heart.
Her fortune I did not want, but It was
large. I had sufficient means, and could
not be suspected of mercenary motives.
We were married after a long and ardent
wooing on my part.
She loved me, but a second marriage
seemed wrong to her, and It was not un
til she realized that she had irretrievably
given me her heart that she would give
her hand.
Neither of us had ever visited Europe.
We decided to cross the ocean during our
honeymoon. . Before we went she showed
me her beautiful home and all her posses
sions. Among them was a store of old
china.
Suddenly she turned to the shelves of
her cabinet and took down a china bowl
transparent, covered with flowers and but
terflies of quaint, unconventional form.
A she held it toward me, 1 saw again
the long, low hung, whitewashed Brazil
ian room the crowd of men playing cards
at an improvised table the figure of the
woi.iau advanced toward m". It was her
attitude that my wife had assumed. I
uttered a cry.
"Are you thirsty ?" she asked.
"It's true, then:" I cried. "You are
the woman who saved my life when I lay
perishing of fever In Brazil ?"
She began to tremble. Setting the
bowl aside, she threw herself into tnj
arms.
"Long ago," she panted "ten years
ago I thought I held that bowl In my
hand and a.ked yon that. It was night.
I do not know whether I dreamt, or
whether I was mad. In the dead of night
I thought a voice called to me : ' Pave the
man whom destiny has set Apart for you!'
Then I arose nnd asked : ' How V
"There lsou our plantation aspring the.
water of which is magical in its power to
cure fevers. I dreamt or thought that
some unseen thing led me toth spring. I
carried this bowl in my hand. 1 filled it.
Then I -food in a strange room long,
low, white, and yon you lay on a pallet
hot wit'i fever, and I said: 'Are you
thirsty ?' and gave you to drink.
"The ne.t morning I would have thought
it was ail ;'. dream but thai the bowl, still
wet, stood at my bedside. Now I have
told you this, do you think me mad or su
perstitious ? 1 have longed so often to tell
you, but I dared not."
But I also had my tale to tell the one
I have told yon.
We ak each other often: "What was
it? What did it mean How is it to be
explained ?" But no answer comes to us.
W hatever It may have beeu, it brought
us togetin.-r, and I bless it from my soul;
for we are happy as few lovers are, my
darling ife and I. And whatever it was
it came, from heaven. Nothing unholy
had any Land in it.
C nrloua R!tapli.
In Alresford Churchyard, Hants, is the
following on au exciseman :
N. snrio'Visor', e.ie-ek bo fenrs
Now no onmmissiioner oliev, ;
IJm's J row fiom cares, oiii rea'.iei. toars.
And all the bvivrn! oi h tirvey.
And this In liochester Churchyard :
Though yoimir she was. her youth conld not
withstand,
Nor her jjrot'iet from leath's Impartial hand,
l.L'e ia a cobweb, bu we e'er so Kay.
.And IHsatli a broom, that sweeps us all away.
In Christ Church Churchyard, Hants, is
the following, which is supposed to allude
to ten persons drowned, whose bodies
were driven on shore, and buried in a
field, but the owner, considering it an in
vasion oti his property, dug them up,
when they were removed to the church
yard :
Ws were not slain, but rais'd
liaii'd not to lifo.
But to bo buried twice,
Ky men of strife.
Whni ro-st could living; bare.
When rlealh had noais t
Ariruc amongst you.
lb:r wrt tu cr ona.
Here Is one from Gainsborough Church
yard on a certain John Gabriel :
Heic tins tho body of Gabriel John.
Who died iu lua year hleen hundred and
Oue.
1'ray for tho soul of Oabriel John,
S ou in i) . if you pleaso. or may lal It alone,
Koi It's A one to tiabriel John.
Who died in tho your eighteen hundred and
one.
TLrs, on a Mr. Partridge, who died in
May, is humorous:
What ! kill a I'aTtridjre In the month of May!
Was tliatdnue IU a sportsman oh. Death
eh 'f
A Learned Wltneao.
Witnesses are often exceedingly stupid,
but we don't know whether this witness
ought to be called stupid or not. It was
desired to get from him au exact account
of some conversation, with the "says I"
nnd " says he," but the counsel conld not
make him comprehend the form in which
he was wanted to make his statement. So
the court took him In hand.
" Now, my man, tell us exactly what
passed."
" Yes, your honor, certainly. I said that
I would not have the pig."
" Well, what was bis answer ? "
"He said that he bad been keeping the
pig for me, and that he"
"No, no; he did not say that he could
not have said it. He spoke in the first
persu'.i."
"No, I was the first person that spoko,
your boner.''
" I mean this : don't bring in the third
person ; repeat his exact words."
" There was no third person, your honor ;
only him and me."
"Look here, my good fellow, he did not
say hr had beeu keeping the pig. He
said, ' 1 have been keeping It.' "
" 1 assure you, your honor, there was no
mention of your boner's name at all. We
are on two different stories, your honor.
There was no third person; and if any
thing had been said about your honor, I
must have heard it."
So the court had to give It up, thongh
the witness was only too glad to tell all he
knew.
The Kind of Tlowar He Wanted.
' I want a lawn mower," said a man as
he stepped into a hardware store.
" A ny special kind you prefer 1 " inquir
ed the dealer.
" No. I don't know much about lawn
mowers myself, but I want the noisest
one that Is made. I've got a darned mean
neighbor, whose children worry the life
out of me with their whooping and yelling
every night till ten o'clock. I want a
mower that can discount the tannery
whistle, and I'll whoop it np every morn
ing from four o'clock 'till breakfast, and
wake up all the little rats. When night
comes they will be sleepy enough to go to
bed at a decent hour."
A machine was picked out. "Never
mind the oil can," said the man, as the
merchant began to tie one to the handle,
"I ain't going to use any oiL Noise is
what I am after."
An Amualne Incident at a Dinner.
An old English ofScer relates the follow
ing anecdote :
When a young subaltern, we were quar
tered at Brighton, and received consider
able attention from a widow and her on
married daughter.
Having joined the lady and her daugh
ter on the esplanade one evening, we were
pressingly invited to return with them to
a quiet family dinner. We accepted the
Invitation and returned to the house.
Dinner was expected at seven o'clock,
but, as the widow was In lodgings, It was
excusable that it did not appear till eight
p. m.
A boy In bnttons waited, and ths dinner
commenced in all due form and with dig
nity. The widow, however, seemed to
have the weak idea that it was not correct
to know what was coming o: the table,
and at length, as the boy placed two
dishes of tarts before us, she inquired :
" What are these. Robert "
The boy, full only of his late pecuniary
transactions with the pastry-cook round
the corner, pointed first at one dish, then
at the other, and said :
"Them's two for a penny, and them's
two for three 'aifpence, mum."
Personal Xralta of Xllmn 71 a r rye t.
In appearance Miss Varryatt is a per
fect blonde, with hair o ' a dead gold tint,
worn in loose, light curt? clustering to a
most intellectually shaped head, and com
plexion of a delicate white and roseate hue,
A tall, slender and most shapely form, a
well turned throat, fine teeth, beantiful
hands, with long white finizers tapering to
pink, almond-shaped nails. In dress she
differs but little from the American lady,
wearing, however, more lace about her
throat and wrists. A broad lace collar
.falling over a garnet velvet waist, with
loose sleeves turned back with the same
sort of lace, and a skirt of garnet cash
mere flowing to the floor In large, grace
ful folds give the renowned novelist a pic
tnresqueness all her own. Taken all In all
she is a woman of commanding presence,
distinguished appearance and high-bred
manners.
COiVHCAL PARROTS.
Soma Good Siorlca About l'olly Xh
I lever Rlrd .Hake. Plenty of
"IMrhlef.
While a new'y-married couple were
away on their honeymoon, they left their
house in charge of servants. On their re
turn their parrot repeated several times,
' Iet's have another bottle ; there's no one
here to know;" and then followed the ap
propriate " plop, plop'' and gurgle. How
the servants must hare loved this clever
bird ! This story Is quite true. So Is the
following: A Yorkshire gentleman had s
feve'r about Christina time, and his par
rot was removed from the dining-room to
the kitchen, where its voice was less like
ly to disturb its master. It remained
there for several weeks, during which It
stole the raisins intended for a plum-pudding.
The cook, in anger, threw soma
hot grease at it, and scalded its head.
When the gentleman got better the bird
was carried back to the dining-room. Its
master approached with newly-shaved
head ; whereupon the parrot turned one
eye upon him, and slowly said, " You
bald-headed ruffian! So you stole the
cook's plums, did you f"
While the late Dean Stanley was a canon
at Canterbury, a gentleman who had been
invited to breakfast with him found all
servants assembled In the gardeu and
gazing up at a laburnum in which their
master's parrot was at large. At that
moment out came the master. The par
rot looked down at him and said, iu a slow
but distinct voice exactly like the late
dean's "Let us not pray." The bird
was eventually captured by the aid of a
flshlng-roiL
A grey parrot was stationed In a nurs
ery, where his greatest delight was to see
the baby bathed. The child being attacked
by some lufantile complaint, the parrot
was removed to the kitchen. There, after
a time, he set up a terrible cry " Tho
baby ! tho dear baby I" All the family
rnshed down to find Wie parrot, in a state
of the wildest excitement, watching the
roasting of a sucking pig.
Dr. Karl Ituss, in his recently-published
work, "The Speaking Parrots," telLs of a
grey, which waa teased by a fat major,
whom it knew well, to climb a stick.
" lp on the stick, Polly up on the stick :"
crlod the officer. The parrot suddenly
burst into a loud lauh, and said, " Up
with you on the stick, major."'
Kverybody has heard of the parrot of
Heury IV. which fell info the Thames
from a window In the palace at Westmin
ster, and called out, " A crown for a boat."
The waterman who rescued it claimed a
crown accordingly ; and the parrot, on be
ing asked what he should be paid, is
stated lo have replied, "Give the knave a
groat."
Dr. Hubs tells another curious story of
a grey which taught a young Amazon
(parrot: to talk. When the pupil did not
learn his words correctly, the grey would
say, " Blockhead !" and turn contemp
tuously away. Eventually the grey and
the Amazon were able to converse. The
former would say, " Have you any
money ?" to which the latter would reply
in a doleful voice, "No." Kosa (the grey)
would then give the name of the emperor,
and Coco (the Amazon; would ejaculate,
' Iong life to liitfl !"
One grey is related to have mourned
for his mistress when she died. It was
difficult to Induce him to take food. Often,
too, he would reawaken the grief of the
mourners by asking them, " But w here is
the lady, then f"
A parrot has been known to live !n con
finement for twenty years without learn
ing a single word, though It afterwards
became an accomplished talker. More
over, no two birds are exactly alike in tem
perament. One learns with di.tlculty, but
never forgets : another picks up every
thing he hears, but remembers nothing
for more than a few days. Some few
learn readily, and retain what they have
learnt. One bird, mentioned by Dr. Rubs,
began to talk the very day that it arrived,
and when It saw breakfast, s.tid, " Bake
cake3" and "Give some to the parrot ;"
while another, also mentioned by him,
could not utter its own name until It had
been eight months with its owner, wrftm
It began to learn something every day.
Ultimately it was taught to repeat verses,
and if It made a mistake would say an
grily. "You are no good ;" but If it got
through its task without au error, it
would praise Itself.
Dr. Greene, who has lately published a
book called ' Parrots In Captivity," tells
of a gray which goes through a long per
formance in which speaking plays quite a
secondary part ; but when It is shut up In
a coal box. It imitates a postman's knock,
and when you say, " Who's there !'' dis
tinctly replies, " Open the door for Polly."
And, combating Curler's opinion that
" these imitative and mechanical quali
ties are not to be attributed to superior
reason or sagacity," Dr. Greene in
stances the case of a cockatoo which waa
never known to ask for potatoes except
when dinner was on the table, nor to say,
" Oh, you're a beauty," but to a child.
Anecdote of Voltaire.
Some one had teased Voltaire a great
while with perpetual letters, to which
Voltaire had given no answer. At last be
wrote to him, "Sir, I am dead. I cannot
In future have the honor to writ to you."
Voltaire never received so severe a sar
casm as from the celebrated author of
" Metromanie," Perin. These rival wits
had been long upon 111 terms together, and
as Voltaire was one day coming out of
the playhouse at Paris, in a bad humor at
the ill-success of one of his tragedies, hat
piet Perin, and contemptuously said to
him:
" Well, sir, and what do you think of
my tragedy "
" That I will not tell you, sir," replied
Perin ; but. If you will not permit me, I
will tell you what ;nu think of it."
' Why, said Voltaire, " what do I think
of It, then, Per'.n "
"Well," replied the wit, "you wish that
1 had written it."
BMILES.
She " And did you paint much when
yon were in Norway and Sweden "
He "A no: There was anothah
paintah there !"
Sober Passenger (angrily) "I.ook
where you step, man :"
Tipsy Passencer apologetically i
"Y-yes. I do; the tr trouble is to-luc
step where I look."
" Have you heard how Jones
is to-
aay
I have just called on him. His brain
Is In a terrible condition."
"Ia that all t Then there is no chance
for his being seriously 111."
The Stars and Strlnea.
The design of the American flag was
adopted by Congress June 14, 1777. The
stripes were first used In a flag which
wns presented by Captain Markoe to the
Philadelphia City Troop in 177.1, and still
in the possession of that organization. In
it thestries appear in the tipper left h.n.l
corner, where the stars now are. Where
the stars come from, or who suggested
them, is a much disputed but little known
nenhlro
GREAT CARD PLAYERS.
STATESMEN WHO WESE F0JTD OF TVS.
How Henry C lay Won a l ine Pletnre
Irom Albert Gallatin Niorlc of
Ad una, ( alklna, and Other.
Th
lie President is said to be fund of i in.
ot-K Garlield was fond of euchre nud
whitit, aud there are a score of men imw
Its too 1. tilted States Senate w ho under
stand the most subtle ii.tricacies of poker.
Daniel Webster was a famous bund nt
euchre; Grner.il Scott liked nothing bet
t'i than a nttrht at the whist ta..l-.-. ami
i'lauk I'ierco k:iev how to i lay raids 1
liked th-uii. in tho days ot Pi.-iie ll.c
f 'i esnJen
tln.v a:
were more liet.iu'
O'.v. Th v w;. '.. !
at n- thiTi
ilUll' Co'
friend ii.
town ,;i d p.ii.l Tisit to the.r
thuir ti:.,:i s. i'ie W..h ni .u u,. sv
j o.: !- nt oi Hut Cleveland Lei'. r ..
Uj ..i- iitci't s! i... ..-iKsii. oil l li Mle. t.
" :'..i . o'o ?.! e,:'.K" .-nil l.s s ;,i
v a :..
ft OU I la
'"ii. Mil ti.-.- li.lc, whicli i-, j t
little piimph'et published i (a I Z :
!. w.-ss the American Minister
land v!
th.-re. -tiii
jut till-, .
to ,1 Hided
bimsoi '.
sii ks to him. It is a veiytin
mi i r. Scltei" !. owes its origin
lli.-i'.i.-di Duchess lathiT than
Hu met this woman, I am told, at one
if the ;tucn's receptions, and fell into
co'iV'-rsa! i. in wit li her about cards. Dur
ing ;hi t-iik ho described to her the beau
ties of poker in such a way that sho be
ca:no iii'ci:s.-!y interrid, nd begged
him to write her out a set of rules and di
rect ioin for j laying the great American
game. This Mr. Srhenck very kindly
oid. The Duchess loarned to plar poker,
and ns it wove its fascinating: toils about
herslio wanted her frien-ts to learn also.
For convenient e she had. Mr. Si heack's
letter pi niled in a neat pamphlet mid dis
tributed among her friends of th (O'irt
ci ' A mal.i ions acribbler heard of
i he, I.sct, anal telegraphed to the American
newspapers that our 1'orei.rn Minister
b.-id publ shed a book on poker-playisig.
They took it for gospel, and du'-Led him
"Poker Bob," and tho name, as usual,
sticks.
Senator Beck, of Kentucky, is one of
the beit story-tcdlers in Congress. Ho
went to school as a boy at a school near
Ashland, tho residence of Henry Clay,
and he described th other iiiiit a isit
w hich a number of the college boys once
made on tha old statesman. "As Mr.
Clay rose to meet ns hi- face shone with
smiles and eveiy boy in the pa.ty was
slraUlitway his friend. In the cour-c of
the talk he nk-d us what we thought of.
his pictni'S. There Mere a number,
some paintings, and some engravings,
hanging tipou the walls in
different parts of the room.
finally decided v. on one, a pict ire of a
woman holding a bowl of t-team.ng mush
in her hand, as the finest oue in tl.e col
let tinn. As we did so. Mr. Clay laughed
aud said: 'Yes. bo;, s. I think you have
pi ked out my best picture, and as you
h ive done so I must toll Its history. I
got that picture at Ghent, and In a curious
way. Albert Gallatin, John tuiney
Adams and myself were thsre making the
treaty, and Mr. Gallatin and myself took
chances in a picture rail's. My prize
turned out to be that picture,' pointing to
an inferior engraving on the other side of
the room, ' and Gallatin got this. Now
Gallatin knew very little about art, and I
did not know much, but I conld see at a
glance that bis picture wns far better than
mine, and that 1 should be laughed at If
we took the pictures homo and compari
sons were made. I saw that I must get
hold of Gallat in s picture, and I sid to
rdm : Mr. Gallatin, these two pictures
were made to match each other and the
man who ha one ought to have both.
Now, I will tell you what I will do. I will
put my picture against yours and we will
play a game of cards for them. The man
who wins shall take both pictures, and
you may name the game.
" ' Mr. Gallatin thought a momeut, con
sented, and said "seven up,' aud," con
tinued Senator Bock, "I cau hear Henry
Clay's hearty laugh now and see his
smile of iutense merriment as he con
cluded, As soon as Gallatin said scven
np I knew I had him. He knew but little
about cards, and I was one of the best
even-up players In Kentucky. The re
sult was as I had anticipated, and I got
the picture.' "
The next story was told by Congressman
Calkins. Said he: "I heard a curious
story of Clay while I was campaigning
in the southern part of Ohio. It wus told
me at a littlo Ohio town, the name of
which I do not bow remember. Clay was
accustomed to stop over at this town on
his way to Washington, and one night
while he was there ha became engaged in
a game of poker with several men about
the hotel to pass away the time. A pro
fessional gambler got into the party,
and cheated for wme time without dis
covery. At last he laid down three aces
when Clay had two in his hand. Clay
had been accustomed to playing with
gentlemen, and one of the poker party,
who told me the story, said that his anger
at this moment was terrible. He slowly
drew himself out of his seat and rose uj
ward until he seemed about seventeen
feet high. He drew his pistol and the
man made for the door. Clay did not
follow him, but he expressed his indig
nation by walking round to his chair and
shooting a holo tl: rough ita center. The
gambler left the town instanter."
Another story about Clay, so well au
thenticated that it conies to me almost di
rectly from Henry Clay's month, relates
an adventure of his with old Throckmor
ton, a noted hotelkeeper at Louisville in
Clay's day. Throckmorton was one of
Mr. Clay's most intimate Kentucky
friends. In their latter days the two were
almost inseparable, and they often joined
hands over the whbt table. Throckmor
ton was a fine whist player, aud nothing
irritated him more than to have his game
Interrupted or spoiled by talking. Throck
morton generally beat Clay, but Clay got
ahead of htm at a whist party in Louis
ville, when he and Throckmorton were
partners. The stakes were nominal -$1 a
game, I think ami as soon as the party
at down at the table Clay began to tell
stories. The result was that he paid no
attention to bis hand, and through his
blunders trick after trick was lost.
Throckmorton protected from time to
time, finally saying : " Really, Mr. Clay,
for a man of your ability, education and
reputation, you are the poorest whist
player I have ever known." The play
continued the same way, and Throck
morton grew more and more angry. At
last Clay said : " Y'ou are making more
fuss by your objecting than 1 am ny my
stories. Now," and here he pulled out a
1 10 gold piece, "we will each lay 10 on
the table, and the man who talks first shall
lose his money."
To this Throckmorton consented, and
the $J0 were laid beside the stakes of 1 a
side in the middle of the table. Clay then
began to rlay worse than ever. He
trumped Throckmorton's ace and threw
away his own suit until Throckmorton,
who for some time bad been uriltitiii his
teeth, ron, and, pushing the moi.ey at
Clay, said : "Here, take yo::r money. I
am not going to let .'0 stand in the way
of my tellin any sue h card -pitying i li t
as you are showinc: yourself to !e w lint I
thick of him." ilethen Went over Clay
rougii-.-hod. Clay laughed as he put the
two c dd pices in his ;o ker, an 1 the
company lan-hed with him when be said
that he had been try.nir for y--ars to In-nt
.Vr. 1 hrot kniisrton. nnd he was glad to
feel that he had d ne so fortune.
Itadl.al 4 lsaisre 1st XI oMirn. Pre..
A New York lady orrespon ient of the
Boston lleral l writes : I think that ven
erable and highly respects! an icle of f
malo dress, the cliemis.-. may a lvat.'a j
onsly lie whollv dispense I with. Kvuy
one Is supposed to have a chemf-e t i h r
back,'' but that this snpuo.it on is not
wholly true was proved to me s mie tim.
ago. When at the seaside las; aut.n.sn
two girls, mutual friends of mine, aud
whom I introduced to each other, wc.it
one warm day wUh me to batiie.
One said to the others
"I am afraid yon will be aw.u'.ly
shocked when you see me undress."'
"Shocked '. Whv "'
"Well. I hardly like to t.-Il you -but
the fact is I have o little on."'
" I don't wear much," said the other.
"All I have is combinations, stays nnd
one petticoat under my dress." Curious
ly enough, both these girls were dns.ed
in precisely the same way in woolen com
binations, stayss (well-shaped and not
tight), one petticoat, and a dress, wioth.
from its elegance, gave no suspicion oi t he
state of affairs underneath. As I had an
opportunity of observing, these young
ladies were dressed in perfect sanitary
style although, none but myself bad any
idea of the fact ; and. In spile of it, they
passed for two of the be-t-dre-s-d v;irl.s
f.t t he fashionable wateiing place where
wo were at.iylug.
I have since had several opportunities
of observation, and I llnd that tjuite a
immlx-r of the be.-t drcs.-cu wom- n of my
acquaintance have renounced the use of
tliemisein favor of woven combinations.
The majority, however, I believe, are not
induced to do -o by s .uilary considerations,
bet simply I ccaiise the chemi-e is a
bulky article aud makes them 1 ok stout
er than is natural to them ; whereas the
combinations bem male in a stretchy
material, fit somewhat closely and fhoir
the sjmnietryof tiie figure.
Invention ol ti n n powder.
In a pa, er read before the Shanghai
branch of tiie Royal Asiatic Society, Dr.
Mat -gowan u.'hrms the claims of the Chi
nese to b.- the originators of gunpowder
and firearms. This c'.nim w its examined in
an elaborate paper some years ago by the
laU- Mr. Mayers, and decided by him in
the nogative. Dr. Mat gowan admits that
gunpowder as nov used is n European
discovery. Anterior to its granulation by
Schwartz it was a crude compound, of
littlo use in propelling mis-iles : tins, says
tho writer, is the article hist Used in
China. The incendiary materials stated
by a Greek historian to have been em
ployed by the Hindoos against Alexan
der's nrmy are stated to have been merely
the napbth ins or pet ro .'etiiu mixtures of
the ancient Coreans, and in early times
used by the Chinese. The ' stink pots,"
so ni'icu used by Chinese pirates, are, it
appe trs, a Cambodian invention. Dr.
Macpowan states alsj that as early as the
twebth or thirteenth century the Chinese
attempted submarine warfare, contriving
lu.le tori e..oi.s for that purpose. In the
year looo au inventorcxhibiied to the then
Emperor of China "a tire-gun aud a Pre
boiub."' He says that while the Chinese
dl-covere 1 the explo-ive nature of nit.r,
sulphar. and charcoal in combination,
they were laggards in its application, from
inability to perfect its manufacture : so. In
the use of firearms, failing to prosecute
experiment, they tire found behind iu the
matter of scientific gunnery.
Cnltiireaisd If a ppliiea.
Now life is md iily what we make it,
but il is. very lnr.ely. what we think it
is, remarks the phi. osop her of the Boston
Traveler. If wo hold before ourselves
constantly, some dreary "might have
leen ;"' if we think it is, in some nnex
plainable way, finer and more exalted to
sot ourselves to a minor key of some mis
erere, wc may become in reality very un
happy. There is no law, unfortunately,
against peoples making themselves
wret'hod. Si h penhauer's theory is that
culture ninkes for uiihappiness : thut the
more cultivated is an individual the
more sensi' ive is he to physical discom
fort or mental troubles, and that he is
thereby a being formed to le jarred upon
at every turn. It is very posib!e that the
old adae about a little learning applies to
this case. A superficial culture doubtless
increases one's sensibilities in various
ways without producing a corresponding
increase of resources ; but the deejer cul
ture supplies these and enables its pos
sessor to bear a thousand trials or to dis
cover means to surmount them as may
be, of which the more ignorant individual
would never have dreamed.
Another Biter nit,
A man traveling afoot with a compan
ion came unexpei tedly upon a country
race course, an 1 found in one portion of
the ground a thimblcrlg establishment In
full work. His companion, a thorough
madcap whom we w ill call B. insisted
on observing the same.
"Would the gent like to bet a dollar he
could find the little pea " said the thiru
blerigger. Done !" was the answer; and down
went the stakes on both sides.
The operator went through his little bit
of sleight-of hand, and B. pitched upon
a thimble, which turned out to be the
right one. A second let, "double or
quits," alo ended In B. 's favor. A third
bet, "a fiver or nothing," made the
loser take extra care over the perform
ance of the trick. Aa n B. lifted one of
the thimbles, showed the pea, and iocket
ed the stake.
"S'help me 1" said the bewildered ar
tist. " 1 never put it there."
"No." replied the winner, making off
with the spoils of war; "I always carry
my own pea."
Ilye Floor for Ileea.
Unbolted rye flour is said to be a t;ood
substitute for liees in place of farina. It
should be placed in shallow toxes a few
rods from the bee stands, so that the lees
can visit it whenever they so desire.
Home awl Fit mi.
Hairy Firmln;.
No system of farming demands more un
tiring carefulness, greater technical
knowledge, or more precision in method
than dairy farming. Lornon Lilt NtocJc
Journal.
IIovv to Loosen
To loosen a l ustet
t II ntrl Screw.
screw applv heat to
its end. A small bar or rod of iron, flat
at the end, if reddened in the fire and ap
plied for two or three minutes, will reader
easy tho withdrawal of the screw.
HOrSEIIOLl) HINTS.
Tint a ponn 1 of sncar Is one t- nt, that
an nun. e of nny lvjuld is two ta'blspot.a
f ills, a: .1 that a pint of ii.juid weighs six
teen ounces.
That lemon inice w ill whiten fnM'r.ffj
cranberry or sir w 1 ert y jnn e w ill oU r It
pink, ami the cr.itcl rind of an r.ango
strained through a cloth w ill color n yel
low. That silver i-puwn that have Worn'
di-cd.ircd in contact with cooked ccg
may be easily brichtotted by rubbing w nh
t omm.in sa't. That alnm'pof gum cam
phor iu 'he closet w her-s silver or plated,
w are is kept w.Il do much toward prevent
ing tarnish. Cnal ga. nnd the near prest
ei c- of rub' er in any ftjrm. Hie tw o things
that cause sils er I i tai'nish rju cklv. 1 he
nil ber line ironnd the ue. k of a fruit jar
will tarnish a whole ciopt full of a,ler" in
the space of one night, while a sils er spoon
left tor mi hour in tee tnoutUof such a
i;r wi 1 l. found -csed of truly rain
bow tii.ts next day.
That m:c of the best and most conven"
Hut re -c; t-o l. s j. r t.t 1 ci.- i.-ry is a cot
ton f'a nnel k il'e so t n k-d to 1 he inside
if a putdnsard door tn I e const ru-tt-d so
that there will be a -e'larate e, ,m part n.ent
f .r e-o h kti:' .r f-vik. The flannel is
sure to ab-e rb n-it moisture left on a
kuiie hr carelessness or l.y accident . and
tiie svholo a:lnir is ornamental. White
canton flannel lonnd w ith scarlet dreaj
braid is prettiest.
That vegetables hich loe some of their
color In 1st ing boiled may have that color
rc-torei! ,y plunvjn r tuein for an instant
in cold water, immediately aflr removing
lrom the boiling wafer.
That hot wotnd ashes applied to a stov
when col l will remove grease. Cover th
spot entirely : do not be sparing of the
ashes.
That in cleaning paint, spots which
w'il! not yield to rubbinir. or to soap even
the sjMits which look like small gashes
cut through the paint may be removed
by rubbing lightly with a damp cloth
dipped in soda.
That a sponge may lx cleansed beetling
it lie covered with milk for twelsThours,
and then rinsing in cold water.
That laundry starch makes the best
paste for scrap-lsooks, because age does
not turn it yellow.
That moths will not eat through papor.
That glass may 1st cut th any hard
tool. liUe a chisel. fr iiTanre, if kept
constantly wot w ith camphor dissolved la
spirits of turjentine.
That the gummed Iajs of circular en
velopes, which come through the malls
unsealed, are worth t-avint;. Once form
the habit of savinc them, and many uses
will be found for them.
That common letter envelopes. If cn
carefully across, or.e end instead of being
torn lrom their enclosures, often make
convenient paerbnps.
That, in case of a burn or scald, the es
sential thing is to exclude th" air from
the in jured memlser as ouicfcly and as
completely as possible. Tiial this may ta
accomplished by immersing the Injured
part in water, not too pold, and then, as
quickly as may be. cover with flour tO
the depth of an inch. If possible, with
drawing the burned part from the water
only as fast as the l'our ran te applied,
thus preventing pain. Caution: Never
apply cotton, wool, or cotton batting to Sj
burn, and do not ue soda on a burn unless
the skin remainssvhrsle.
An A rentier! nral Qsseatlon.
Teacher to class In arrhitecturt " Cen
tlenien, you have examined the designs
for to-day's lessons ? "
Class "We have."
Teacher " Weil then, Mr. Brown, will
you kindly tell me what the nave of a
chnri h is"? "
Brow n " Certainly, sir. It is the Sun
day school superintendent w ho is cushnr
of a bank- I'i'lthui gn t'hrmiirit.
Tnberosev
To propagate tuberoses, the small off
sets that form around the bulb are broken
off, and planted in row s In rich, light soil,
taking them up again lefore winter, of
course. They will bloom the second or
third year. Unless these off seta ars
broken oil when planting the flowering
bulbs, these will not bloom weiL
Joan llllltus Fhiloaoph).
Happiness k.m't be defined without
fnaklig it look snspishns;
the happyeit
kno it the least.
Lsiv iz like truth: it wi'l translate.
It
lz the same in all langunsres.
Ambishuns ladder rests nirinst a star.
The man who haz nothing to do Is
either a loafer, or in danger of h.:ng one
at any time for the next nin-ty das.
Thnre iz more real karakter in the twa
little words "yes" and "no" than in all
the rest ov the language.
It may be poasible for a man to tell how
wicked he lz. but impossible to tell how
wicked he may he.
Talk is the cheapest literature I kno ov
it iz az cheap az w ind, aid just about as
plenty.
To gir It up iz to meet defeat more than
half-way ; a forlorn hope iz a humbug.
Povertv haz no b.tkbone; it makea a
man az hollow az a goose-quill, and aa
limpsy az a siring.
It is really wonderphull how much w
all kno. I never liar suggested an idea
that ailmost onny one count not improve
upon ; and never ha v herd one st: tfstesi
by others that I did not hav an itf rung tn
supplement myseit.
Cunning at best Is but the chicanery or
wisdom.
Young man. don't studdr the hesveus;
the 1ord haz promised you a time to sow
oats nntl gather the krop, and that iz euufl
for you to kno about the weather.
Money !z a diffikult thing to ridikule.
You may call a man "a ritt h phooi'" bnt
hiz bank a konnt will all the time start
yon in the face.
The man who dnz the brRt he kan mar,
not w in the race, but ho serlainly kan't
be beat.
Politeness Is a species ov gotxllyness
Slid he who is allwusa kind lz all wus. po
lite. Ti e reszon whl lies arkutralate so fas
lz bekauze mankind must hav nu things,
and most nu things are false.
Thare lz a grate deal ov talk in wine,
occasional wit, bnt little wisdom.
Menny are honest jut as they ere pa
shunt, bekauze they are too lazy to bo
otherw I.e.
So lonir as branes rule the world, th
world Is komparati vely safe.
Nortonety makes a man know toslsy,
perhaps to-inorrosv. but a year from to
day forgotten, and that, too, forever.
One reazou whi the devil lz so snckcess
fnl, he iz allwuss looking for a job.
Eserla.tlns Shoe,
A nobleman of Cascony 'for all Gascons
are noblemen I complaining that his putups
did not last long enough, the humble
shoemaker asked hint of what stuff his
lordship should like to have them m:. t"
"Make the ramp. " said ho. "of the
throat of a chorister ; the quarter, of tlo
skin of a wolf 's neck ; and the sole, ot s
woman's tongue."
The astonished Crisjdn made bold with
a second question in the shape of a timid
and besitatiug " Pourqnoi
" Why, you blockhead." replied the wag,
" because the first never aflnnts water;
the second, because It never bends on
either side ; and the last, ls. a'ise, altbougk
always in motion, it never wears out"'
The man that parts bis hair in the B-.id-sTJe
nnd wears eye-.-la-ses mar bare
brrdns. bnt it's no lau'.l of his. lie Inher
its l hem.
" Why does a est, sir, while eating turn
ber hcatl t.rst trie way and then tbe
oilier-'' "lor the reason,'' ioplid the
exummtd, " that bhe caiHot turn it both
ways at once.''