THE SON or HIS FATHER. Irate Pedagogue Cleverly Reproved by His Sagacious Off spring. A professor of mathematics in a lead ing New Kngland college had been much annoyed by the students coming to class without their textbooks. Various rea sons were given. One man said that some one had borrowed his book, relates .Judge. "That's no excuse," said the irale pro feasor. "Hereafter your track and your book are to be here. Any man who fails to bring them will be marked zero. No ex cuse rl any kind will be taken." The professor's son was a member of this class, anil was the first one to be called up at the next recitation. "A-iain, problem 14 at the board," called the professor. "Pardon me, professor,' said his son; "but 1 haven't my book." "Haven't your book?" roared the pro fessor. lie was doubly angry because his own son was the first offender. "Didn't you hear what 1 said yester day?" "Yes, professor; but my father bor rowed in\* •book last night, and he didn't bring it back." A New Being. Sliepard, 111., Jan Bth (Special).—Mrs. Sarah K. itowe, who is residing lure, says ►he feels like "A New Being," although she is in her lifty-seventh year. Why? be cause she lias taken Dodd's Kidney Pills, that well known medicine that has put new life into old bodies, and has come as a God-send into homes of sorrow and suffering. She says: "No one knows what awful torture I suffered with Rheumatism and Kidney Trouble, until 1 got cured by Dodd's Kid ney l'ills. This grand remedy drove the Rheumatism out of my body, nothing else ever did me any good. Dodd's Kidney Pills are worth one hundred times their price, for they have made me, though I am fifty-seven years old, a new being. I am in better shape now than i »iave ueen for many years, and I owe it all to Dodd's Kidney Pills." Commercialism. "Do you think this government is safe?" "One of the best investments I know of," i-nswered the sordid politician, "lis possibilities for paying dividends haven't teen scratched as yet. —Washington Star. AWFUL ITCHING ON SCALP. Hair Finally Had to Be Cut to Save Any—Scalp Now in Good Con dition—Cured by Cuticura. "I used the Cuticura Soap and Ointment for a diseased scalp, dandruff, and con stant falling of liair. Finally J had to cut my hair to save any at all.* Just at that time 1 read about the Cuticura Remedies. Once every week J shampooed my hair with the Cuticura Soap, and 1 used the Ointment twice a week. In two months' time my hair was long enough to do up in French twist. That is now five years ago, and 1 have a lovelv head of hair. The length is tfix inches below my waist line, my scalp is in very good condition, and no more dandruff or itching of the scalp. I used other remedies that were recom mended to me as good, but with no re sult". Mrs. \\ 1". tii icss, Clay Center, Neb., Oct. 23. 1903." TROUBLE OVER A POTATO. Spud Gathered In by Wrong Diner Puts Waitress in a Pre dicament. "I had a queer cxericnee in a restau rant the other day," said a Denver law yer, according to the Post. "The waitress brought ray order and that of a man across the aisle from me at the same time. There was a small baked potato with my order. 1 supposed it was a 'side dish,' so I began to eat it. A min ute or so later the girl came back to me. " 'Say,' she said, "where's that potato? It w isn't for you.' " 'l'm s<Try,' I replied, 'but I've eaten most cl it The rest is here on my plate.' The girl went over and talked a moment with the other man. Then she came back. " 'He w; nts his potato.' she said. '1 can't get him no other on his order.' But. my dear girl,' I said, 'the potato is practically eaten.' I was getting cm barra --ed. " 'What am I going to do?" she asked " 1 don't know,' I growled. 'Now stop bothering me about that potato.' "She consulted the other man again. Then she took a position between us. 'Youse two fellers can settle this potato matter between youse,' she said, and oil she '.vent. "'lVie people sitting near seemed to be enjoying the mix-up so much that I got up ind left. I'll eat ao more restaurant potatoes unless I'm absolutely sure they are mine." Usually when a roan reaches the turn in the lane he finds that it turns in the wrong direction.—Chicago Daily News. Life serves some of her children dessert for every course. • Taste for duty can be cultivated like any other. INCIPIENT CONSUMPTION. How Food Headed Off tl.e Insidious Disease. The happy wife of a good old-fash lone-1 Mich, farmer says: "In the spring of 1902 I was taken sick—a general breaking down, as it were. I was excessively nervous, could not sleep well at night, my food seemed to do me no good, and I was so weak 1 could scarcely walk across the room. "The doctor said my condition was due to overwork and close confinement and that he very much feared that consumption would set in. For several months I took one kind of medicine aft'-r another, but with no good effect —ln fact, I seemed to grow worse. "Then I determined to quit all medi cines, give up coffee and see what Grape-Nuts food would do for me. 1 began to eat Grape-Nuts with sugar and criam and bread und butter three time i a day. "The elfi t was mrprtsing! I began to gain ll< h ami rur ih forthwith, my nerv. quieted down and grew nor mally steady und sound, sweet sleep came Lack to nit* lii >lx wn« i timo 1 di linrg' I the hired nlrl und fom meiiced to do my ©wn hou , work for a family of u 'x This w i t« i ■ age and 1 ant doIBK It still, an Ic: / It." Katun given l»y l*o tutu Co., Bat tle Creek, M It'll. There's a reaw«<n. Rej <J the Hit to twoa,"ibo U"jd tu Well.tll\>, in l b Elrrtririiy tro Dirrrt flnwoH to SUnHiUttuntiz? lUorlii By THOMAS A. EDISON. I W e arc groping on the verge of another great epoch in the world's history. It would not surprise me , igP? a »y morning to wake up and learn that sonic one, or :j some group, of the 300,000 scientific men who are j investigating all over the earth has seized the secret , of electricity by direct process and begun another SfclW practical revolution of human affairs, i®® It can he done. It will be done. I expect to see it before I die. 1 The first great change in the production of electricity will abolish the carrying of coal for that purpose. Instead of digging gross ma- J terial out of the earth, loading it on cars and carrying it, say 500 miles, ; there to put it under a boiler, burn it and so get power, we shall set up plants at the mouths of the mines, generate the power there and transmit it wherever it is needed bv copper wires. From a practical standpoint the most tremendous thing in the problem of eleclricity is the fact that we only get about 15 per cent, of the energy of the coal we burn. Eighty-five per cent, goes up the chimney. Now if we could find a way to get the energy out of the coal by some direct process, without wasting 85 per cent, of it would so multi- ! ply and so cheapen electric power as to inaugurate a new epoch in the history of the world. Some day the great discovery will be made, and when it is the ; steam engine will be driven out of use. It will then be possibleto have ! airships. I expect to see airships flying before my death. Such a discovery will make it possible to drive ships across the sea by electricity at the rate of 40 or 50 miles an hour—three days across the Atlantic, from shore to shore. The direct process will give the world electricity at such a low cost that electric light can be used by everybody, and railways can be oper ated at a fraction of their present expense. The city of New York j cotild be lit as brilliantly in the nighttime as in the daytime, without any additional cost. 1 lie human race may well look forward with hope toward the day in which the discovery will be announced, for after that the world will be greatly transformed. When Canon Far- Unmnthtg Among learned more religion ' tht Praiihrts r" than from all the, By DR. JENKIN LLOYD JONES. books of theo]ogy , —— have ever read," lie j was stating the truth j ever apparent to the sage and the saint, that the bard is ever closely allied to the prophet. Poetry is ever the vehicle of the highest revela tion. 1 lie soul attuned to harmonies is in touch with the infinite. 'I lie nobler the bard the more universal his message, and universality is the gift of poetry, the witness of God in the soul of man. Robert Browning was a bard who, to use his own phrase, "be lieved in soul and was very sure of God." He was a seer who appre hended truth at first hand. He verified the true function of the prophet, which is that of a spokesman, a mouthpiece of the Almighty, witnessing to the truth, justice and love which he found in his own heart corroborated by his study of nature and man. Robert Browning could and did write delightful ballads, ringing, singing, swinging things that ravish the ear with the lilt of delightful rhythm, tne charm of echoing rhymes. 111 these directions other masters of English poetry may, perhaps, excel him. We must travel inward if we are to discover his unique power and enter the realm in which lie is unquestionably master. In this inward journev we are _———, first impressed with Browning's profound belief in the human soul. He was not the poet of "nice people" only; he was ititer ested in man as man. Even the rag ends and fag ends of human nature were to jUIL him not only interesting, but hopeful. His faith in freedom was profound, his enthusiasm for liberty was lifelong; lie J99 He was the forerunner of the moralists who say that with every elaboration of the social fabric ethics grows more intri- BEg cate; that even psychology, the science of | soul, in its higher reaches becomes soeiul ogy, the science of society. ————————l The question of race HJnuuujratunt auti jl* ness to our f c " ow men. 4)13 JPUUIiUtiuUUUt The United States pre sents the best example By VVM. LLOYD GARRISON. to the world of diverse peoples uniting under freedom to evolve a greater race. From the proudest to the most abject and enslaved nationalities contributions have steadily flowed in a common stream, which is a marvel of breadth and force. The blood of the Celt, the Hebrew, the Anglo-Saxon, the Gaul, the Slav, the negro, the Asiatic, the uttermost tribes of the earth, can be found mingled in American descendants—no mean product of a no ble experiment. If anything can confirm the rational theorv that •.II the inhabitants of the jjlobe are of a single race, varied by different environments and circumstances, it i> the spectacle presented in this country. Color, custom, habit, tires-;, religion, the racial difference that chiellly strike the eye, are merely of the surface. At bottom a I common humanity exists. I'lie real question is not whether races will or will not assimilate. The world process nev>r ceases. It is whether it shall proceed law fully and under protectio.i of society, or be left to Inst and brutality. \-sitnilalion never yet came from the bludgeon, not excepting! the bludgeon of benevolence. If we accept in practice the declaration, I which as Christians we profe-s to believe, that God has made of one Mood all the nations of the earth to dwell together, tn; king our coun ts embrace the \\<>rld and our countrymen all mankind, no race prob v.il! tiouble its. iv>r tint: immigration J *• WIK Ilk be vvukiwL L " CAMERON COUNTY PRESS, THURSDAY, JANUARY 18, 1506 WOMEN WHO SUFFER Dr. Williams' Pink Pills the On* Remedy Particularly Suited For Feminine Ills. To women who suffer Dr. Williams' | Pink Pills are worth their weight in | gold. At special periods a woman needs ! medicine to regulate her blood supply or | her life will be a round of pain and suf- I fering. Dr. Williams' Pink Pills are j absolutely the finest medicine that ever a woman took. They actually make ■ ucw blood. They aro good for men too I —but they are good in a special way | for women. "It was three years ago last spring that my health failed me," says Mrs ' Arthur Conklin, of No. 5 Coldwater street, Battle Creek, Mich. " I suffered i from leucorrhcea and other troubles i that, I presume, wero caused by the weakness it produced. I had sinking | spells, nervous headaches, was weak ; and exhausted all the time and looked like a walking skeleton. "My back and limbs would acho al most continually and there wero days when I was absolutely helpless from sick headacho. I tried one doctor after another but cannot say that they helped me at all. My liver was sluggish and | I was troubled some with constipation. " One day a physician who has now retired from practice met my husband on the street and inquired about my i health. Ho advised my husband to get j some of Dr. Williams' Pink Pills for me, | said they were a good medicine, better I for my trouble than ho could put up. I tried them, improved steadily and soon I was entirely cured. As soon as the leucorrhoea was cured the headaches and other pains stopped. lam entirely j well now but intend to continue to use i Dr. Williams' Pink Pills as a spring i tonic." The genuine Dr. Williams' Pink Pills are sold by all druggists and by the Dr. Williams Medicine Company, Schenec tady, N. Y. i —_—__ Have an Advantage. The Russian students seem to have the advantage of the American students, all things considered. A revolution is sub stantially as distracting and brutal as football, and there isn't so strong a taint of professionalism about it.—Life. To Cure a Cold in One Day Take LAXATIVE BROMO Quinine Tablets, j Druggists refund money if it fails to cure. E.W. GUOVE'S signature is 011 each box. 25C. Nobody ever lived so long but that he could reasonably be expected to live ten years longer. This is particularly true of wealthy octogenarian uncles.—St. Louis Globe-Democrat. j Piso's Cure for Consumption is an infalli ble medicine for cougiis and colds.—N. VV. Samuel, Oceao Grove. S. J., Feb. 17,1900. It is a bad idea to put friendship and love to the lt lt is bettor to believe , I hat they really exist. —St. Louis Clobe ' Democrat. . » Mrs. Austin's Buckwheat flour gives | you the r< d genuine old buckwheat flavor. | Atk for Mrs. Austin's Buckwheat fiour. When a woman wants to love a man she finds no difficulty in believing he has an attractive personality.—Philadelphia Bul letin. j '-OTHERS. The better class of druggists, everywhere, arc men of scientific attainments and high integrity, 1 who devoto their lives to the welfare of their fellow men in supplying the best of remedies and purest medicinal agents of known value, in accordance with physicians' prescriptions and J scientific formula. Druggists of the better class manufacture many excellent remedies, but ■ always under original or ollicinal names and they never sell false brands, or imitation medicines. 2 'J hey are the men to deal with when in need of anything in their line, which usually includes ■ all standard remedies and corresponding adjuncts of a first-class pharmacy and the finest and 1 best of toilet articles and preparations and many useful accessories and remedial appliances. \ I The earning of a fair living, with tho satisfaction which arises from a knowledge of the benefits conferred upon their patrons and assistance to the medical profession, is usually their greatest ! reward for long years of study and many hours of daily toil. They all know that Syrup of Figs is an excellent laxative remedy and that it gives universal satisfaction, and therefore they are selling many millions of bottles annually to tho well informed purchasers of tho choicest A remedies, and they always take pleasure in handing out the genuine article bearing the full U name of the Company—California Fig Syrup Co. —printed on the front of every package. F M They know that in cases of colds and headaches attended by biliousness and constipation and % ■ of weakness or torpidity of the liver and bowdls, arising from irregular habits, indigestion, or S 112 over-eating, that there i 3 no other remedy so pleasant, prompt and beneficial in its effects as I Syrup of Figs, and they are glad to sell it because it gives universal satisfaction. Owing to tho excellence of Syrup of Figs, the universal satisfaction which it gives nnd tho I immense demand for it, imitations have been made, tried and condemned, but there are fl A individual druggists to bo found, here and there, who do not maintain the dignity and principles (S I of tho profession ami whose greed get 3 tho better of their judgment, and who do not hesitato □ I to recommend and try to sell tho imitations in order to make a larger profit. Such preparations ■ I sometimes have tho name—" Syrup of Figs"—or "Fig Syrup" and of some piratical concern, 1 I or fictitious fig syrup company, printed on tho package, but they never have the full name of tho Company—California Fig Syrup Co.—printed on the front of the package. Tho imitations I I should bo rejected because they are injurious to tho system. In order to sell the imitations B I they find it necessary to resort to misrepresentation or deception, and whenever a dealer passes m ■ off on a customer a preparation under the name of "Syrup of Figs" or "Fig Syrup," which g| » does not bear the full name of the California Fig Syrup Co. printed on the front of the package, ■ a ho is attempting to deceive and mislead the patron who has been so unfortunate as to enter his ■ ■ establishment, whether it bo largo or small, for if the dealer resorts to misrepresentation and 1 i I and deception in one case he will do so with other medicinal agents, and in the filling of I physicians' prescriptions, and should be avoided by every one who values health and happiness. Knowing that tho great majority of druggists are reliable, we supply the immense demand j I for our excellent remedy entirely through the druggists, of whom it may be purchased every- I ft where, in original packages only, at the regular price of fifty cents per bottle, but as exceptions g ■ exist it is necessary to inform the public of tho facts, in order that all may decline or return B M any imitation whit h may be told to them. If it does not bear tb<- full name of the Company M M California Fig Syrup Co.—printed on the front of every package, do not hesitate to return the 3 ff article and to demand tlie return of your money, and in future goto one o{ the better class of I W druggists who will sell you what you wi hand the best of everything in his line at reasonable pri^as. PUTNAM FADELESS DYES Col»r mi- ■ < mil brighter andtaiitercslar* than kmothkrrfye On - lOcpacltnoocLloriallllbon. The» die in colli water li.tler than sn» other it»e. You cin Ui» km Qitrmi nt A ill.out imiiiMg jim rI. Writ lor Imu booklet --Ho* UD.Ul.uh and Mu Colon OKHi CO., 1 iiloavllh, M/i.tuur/. e.2Tnnsr;3E IITTO i •» guarantied TO C.VH* 'ANlltKinNt i GOLD.Kt.uIACHEAHO Nt'<RAL6IA. ■' v.. .Vm",uv;, »r **•— -i"* - f'i H.JNcNMri Jf• Mi>'idiiMJMiiuii(,^|ri4M|/(*Miii#, U& AN ARTIST IN HIS LINE. Merchant of tbe Pave Displays Gen ius Worthy of a Higher Calling. A man with shrewd gray eyes walked along the busy down-town street, care fully observing everything. Suddenly he paused, then rushed toward a rain-pipe at tached to a building and rammed his cane into il. The familiar squealing of a rat pierced the air, relates Youth's Compan ion. All daughters of Kve within hearing 1 ft ed their skirts and fled the place. Men and boys began to crowd around. Peo ple came from across the street. Carts ami cabs halted. "Say, mister, that stick isn't long i enough!" shouted a newsboy. "Somebody go and get a terrier," sug gested another. Evidently the owner of the shrewd gray eyes did not desire advice, but intended to deal with that rat according to Ins own fancy. He paid not the slightest at- ! tention tc the remarks, out continued vig orously to ply his cane. "Let him come out and then set the dogs cn!" "Put your hand in and grab him by the tail!" "Say, why don't you use the big end of ! that c-anc?" "Blow smoke lip the pipe!" At last the star performer glanced over his shoulder the crowd was packed and ! I jammed behind him, and two policemen on j the outskirts were struggling to make an I I opening—the "psychological moment" was ! come. | The man removed something from be- ! j tween his teeth, and extended it toward i the crowd, I "Here you are, gentlemen!" he cried. "The cleverest invention yet made—Wilk inson's weird and wonderful patent whistle. Imitates everything from a rat to a rhinoceros! Embrace your opportunity, | entertain ->jr friends, make the children happy only a few left, and those going ldf. .v lid file, at ten cents apiece!" Robbed in Church. Just think what an outrage it is to be robbed of all the benefits of the services ' by continuous coughing throughout the ; congregation, when Anti-Gripine is guar anteed to cure. Scdil everywhere. 25 ets. F. W. Diemcr, M. D., Manufacturer, Springfield, Mo. Quite Different. "Pa, what's the difference between a provision and a trade?" "The man who works at a trade quits when his eight hours are up. The man who follows a profession has to keep on until his work is done."—Chicago Record* Herald. N W. Aver & Son, Philadelphia, the " Kecping-Kvcr-Lastiiigly-At-lt" advertis ing agents, have sent out their calendar for 190(1 which as usual is a very handsome and useful office accessory. The edition is limited. While tlicy last copies may be had by scud? ing2s cents to the lirin named above." ♦ Simple Process. Sharpe- Want to borrow my pistol? What for? Simple—To blow out my brains. "I'aof! A pair of bellows will do that!" j —ls. Y. News. llow to cure Biliousness, Stomach Di-t- I orders, Chronic Constipation, Bladder, ■ Liver and Kidney Irregularities, take Spanish Cross Tea for a month. 25c a 1 package. J Turn, Fortune, turn thy wheel. Civc j us bottom spokes a show! —N. O. Pica | yuue. DOES YOUR BACK ACHE ? Cure the Kidneys and the Pain Will Never Return. Only one sure way to cure an aching back. Cure the cause, the kidneys. cures made by Doan'a Coleman, a prominent several years my kid » languid, nervous and lame in the morning-. Doan's Kidney Pills helped me right away, and tho great relief that followed has been permanent." Sold by all dealers. 50 cents a box. Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, JS ? . Y. | Kemp's Balsam; I Will stop any cough that I Ben be stopped by any B r edlcine and cure coughs | ' lat cannot be cured by any £ other medicine. It is always the best I cough cure. You cannot | allord to take chances on 1 any other kind. KEMP'S BALSAM cures I coughs, colds, bronchitis, | | grip, asthma and consump- | i tion in first stages. On the Shelf of every home in the Uul!"J States there should be found a bottle of Shiloh's Con sumption Cure, the Lung Tonic, for Coughs, Colds and all irritations of the throat, lungs and air passages. It is easy to take, gives instant relief and cures permanently. Generation after Generation have pronounced Shiloh to he the safest, surest, quickest and best family cuie ton Coldsand Coughs. Nothing has ever been found to take its place in the home. Try Shiloh and be cured, or say you w ere nol and get your money hack. Isn't this fair ? Mrs. E. James, of Hibbing, Minn., says:— " There is no cure like Shiloh for Coughs, Colds, Croup, Sore Throat, Hoarseness, Bronchitis of Whooping Cough. My oldest son was aimosl choked. The doctors could not relieve him, flo used two bottles cf Shiloh &ud Was completely cured. It has no equal." s>s SHILOH 25c. with gunrantrff «aaDajSw«esii eja 3L>| furnish tit • work an I tc.vh yt- i fre«\ y work ia tho locality whero y«»i« live. ntl us y.»ur address and wo will ; explain th®l>usinris fully, remotnl».«r" • guarantee ael<-» | r t.l rf P\ for every day's work al>-"! ;t ;ly euro. Write .'it one®. KUtAL iU.NU .Ul I III.Ms CO., Lux 1370 lieiroit, Mich. PATENTS j BITZUEUALO& CO.. Box li Washington. It. C. 7
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers