Tlfil COLUMBIAN, BLOOMSBURG, PA. THAI AWrUL BOY. Nay. cemuire not the n Try boy, Whoso liuoynnt heart reticle At ttint dry monotone of Joy In lpnuthy prayer that dwclle; Me heir Moil not In dronln words, Hut in the Joyous songs and birds. Think not to keep those morry eyes fj tnrnpi! with solemn stare They r.lmw the gleam of summer skies, 'kid's wisdom planter! there; Their twinkling Ha-h, their wsywsrd mirth, Display the sweetest Joys of eartn. Then humhle not his boyish pride. Nor teach, with spirit rash. That love Is but a narrow stride Krum prayer to swInglnK lash; That boys to have their sins forlen Must e'er be mauled along to hoavsn, A tender smile, a word of uheer, A prayer sincere but brief, . Will banish every boyish fear, t And cloi-e Iho door to grief; ltemcmber. In your solemn Joy, That you were once an awful boy! Cleveland Plain Dealer. THE CAPfALVS WIFE. "Speaking of women," said the mate, "no man rtM'scis women more than I lo. My mother was a woman, air! and 1 make uo doubt youra was a woman, too." I admitted that the mate'a surmlso was correct. "Well, sir! having said what .hare, you won't misunderstand me when I say that the one thing I can't stand (a a woman aboard ship. Give ma corpses, and parsons and lunatic every day in the year sooner than wo men. A woman, when she's aboard Bhlp, Is either sick, in which caae she exports the whole ship's company to do nothing but wait upon her, or aba isn't sick, in which case she la inter fi ring with everything and getting la everybody's way." "Yet there was a woman," I re narked, "a captain's wife, who took command of the ahip when her hus band died, and brought her into port." "I've heard that yarn," the mate replied, "ever since I first went to sea-, and I believed it once, when I didn't know any better. "Hut to come back to what I was talking about. Were you ever ship wrecked in company with a woman. Well, you can be thankful you were not. It's bad enough to have to aban don your ship and take to the boats when you're a thousand miles from land and your chances of being pick ed up Is about one in a thousand; but) If you have to take a woman In the boat with you h's lust I beg your pardon, air! and I won't use such lang uage again. But tt aggravates me to think of the experience I once had with a woman in a boat. "I waa mate of a big clipper ahip In the China trade at the time I am tell ing you of. She was the Chariot of the Sena and most of ua like you remem ber her. She was a amart ahip, but about as uncomfortable a one aa a man ever set his foot aboard. "The captain's name was McConigle, and he waa a Scotchman, and he took his wife with htm. I wouldn't have hipped if I had known that there was to be a woman in the cabin, but I naturally didn't find it out until wa came to sail. "The captain was about as hard and about as mean as they make 'em, so far aa the crew were concerned, but 1 am free to say that he always treat ed me well, and was the moat aociabls man I ever sailed with. What was curious, however, waa that he had mighty little to say to his wife. Nei ther of them seemed to care a strawi for the other, and at first I couldn't understand why he took her with him, when he might have left her ashore. "She waa a handsome woman. She was young, being, as I should Judge, about twenty-five, and ahe carried more sail In the way of high spirits than any sober woman I ever knew. She waa always laughing and singing and making Jokes with the captain and me though she couldn't ever get aj smile out of him. "On the contrary, when ahe tried a joke on him he would look so grim that you couldn't have hoisted a smlla out of him even with the steam winch. 1 mistrusted the woman from the first. And then, before we had been a week out of London she began mak ing eyes at me at least, aa far as I could Judge. "Aa you might suppose, I had rery little to do with the woman. Of course, I treated her politely, she be ing a woman, and being also the cap tain's wife, but I never let her come io anchor alongside of me if I could help it. "I couldn't help finding, out. how ever, that she and her husband led & cat and dog life, and that she was about as miserable as a woman can be, in spite of her Jokes and her singing. Tlul made me all the more shy of her, for an unhappy married woman is more dangerous than a cargo of gun powder. "It so happened that when the cap tain Judged It was time to put the sl.ip to the westward, and double the Horn, a heavy easterly gale came up, v,UU thick snow and the glass falling, net quick, you understand, but slow and steady. There waa Ice In tha neighborhood, too, for we sighted two icebergs to the southward of ua about diij break, " 'There are some meu, Mr. Smith, f,ai the captain to me, "who would shorten sail and try to keep a look-0'- for Ice. Now that isn't my style. 1 i on't like Ice any better than any other man does, but so long aa I can's, r.eo It I don't worry over It. " 'There is no good In keeping a look ov.'. tor Ice when you couldn't see an iceberg till your flying jlbboom fouled i. rnd if she's going to strike an Ice Iji s. t he'll do It under her topsails Ium s goon as she will with her top Aiilnt sails. " 'If there's an Iceberg In the road II 7;in't Ret out of the way for us, and r can't pet out of the way for it, so o only thing to do Is to Just slam t!;i ship right through till we get i. :.r wea'her again.' ;:.c?:itlns the steward and the cap Iain's wit?, an 1 -the cook and the men l" lh? w'icel, all hands were under .j.o k ot the long boat, and the sec r.J r.iati was amoving in the door ol t-.l-Doao. All at once the old man suys: I'll go below now, Mr. Smith, you'll call me If there la any , ' wl;.jr.& lu tho weather.' , ' "With that he started to go below, but on second though s tfirued and went forward. He had reached the caboose, and stootf there talking with the second mate, whose name waa Ramsey, when there camo a pllntr Ing crah, as the flying Jlbboom struck an Iceberg fair and square, and lu another socond the shfp struck with a force that threw me flat on the deck. "Before I could pick myself up all three masts went, the foremast and malnmnt going Just below the fut tuck shrouds, and carrying the mix sen topmast to keep them company. "I ran forward to see what damage had been done to the ship, but I didn't need to look twice to see that her bows were stove In below the wa ter line, and that she hadn't many minutes to float "Then I looked for the captain, and found him and more than half tha crew lying dead under the mainmast that had crushed them, and the sec ond mate aa well. "I told the men to clear away ona of the quarter boats, and put a break er of water In her, and then I Jump ed below and gat a bag of biscuits and told the steward to bring anything to eat he could lay his hand on. "I rushed up the oompanlonway anil found the captain's wife in the boat holding on to one of the falls, and or dering the men to wait for me with a pistol in her right hand. "There were six meu. besides myself and the captain's wife. In our boat, and seven met) in the other boat. Each boat had a breaker ot water, but all provisions were aboard my boat, so I gave the others one of our two bags of biscuiifl, and telling them to keep within hail of us, we pulled away from the wreck, bo aa to be clear of her when she went into her flurry. "We lost sight of the other boat be fore we had been rowing ten minutes, and nothing was ever heard or seen of her afterward. "There was no use In trying to land on Terra del Fuego. for we were bet ter off In the boat than we would have been on a deserted Island, with noth ing to eat except ourselves, and a lot of savages standing by to eat ua. "So I told the men we would keep on to the westward, and that as soon as we got Into the Pacific we should have fine weather and be sure to ba picked up by somebody. i "I don't think the captain's wife and1 I had spoken since the boats cast off. She naturally sat In the stern sheets with me. and she knew that her hus band had been killed without my tell ing her about It "When we had shook ourselves down In the boat and were beginning to be comfortable I says to her: "This ain't the sort of yachting trip that Is suited to you, ma'am; but it won't last long, and we must Just make the best of if " 'It's heaven compared with that ship.' said she. 'This is the first hap py moment I've known since we sail ed from London.' "We didn't say any more for tha next hour, and then she told me that she waa used to steering a boat and that when I wanted to sleep ahe would take the tiller. "Toward night the snow stopped falling and the weather cleared off beautiful. The wind went down, too, and I told the men they might knock off rowing and turn in, and that the lady and 1 would look after the boat. "It wasn't long before the men were asleep, and I was finding it pretty hard to keep my eyes open. All at once the woman says, 'Your name Is Tom. isn't it?' " That's what I waa christened and that's the name in my discharges,' says I. " 'My name is Mary,' she continued. 'I want you to call me Mary and I'll call you Tom. It's too ridiculous for sh Id wrecked people to go on calling one another Mr. Thla and Mrs. That' " 'Very good, ma'am,' says I. " 'And now, Tom,' said ahe, 'I want you to go to sleep. I'm not sleepy, and you are. Give me the helm and I'll call you if anything happens.' "I'm not goln' to give you a regular log of every hour aboard that boat. We had pleasant weather for three or four days, by whtch time, I Judged, we were fairly round the Horn, and so I put her head to the nor'rard. "All that time we never saw a sail, and at the end of three days the bis cuit waa nearly all gone, so that wa had come down to an allowance of about an Inch square for eaoh man. "Mary and I had got pretty well acquainted during the three days. You can't sit next to a good looking wo man all day in an open boat and sleep with your head in her lap, and have her sleeping with her head on your shoulder without getting to know her middling well. "I don't suppose there la any harm in my telling you that, she regularly made love to me, and, what is tha moat curious part of the whole thing, she really meant It Why, ahe pro posed to me that after we were picked uo and reached port we Bhould be mar ried. " 'Thank you, ma'am, says I, 'for your good opinion, but the fact is I'm already married. " 'But not to a, woman that you hav been cast away with in an open boat Besides, I know you don't care for your wife, and If you don't care for me now you will In time.' "The fourth day the men turned out! stiff and hungry and savage, and after talking a little while among them selves one of them spoke up and said that they had resolved that I should serve out the bottle of rum that I hadl kent hid in the stern sheets, and that after that they would let me know what they lutended to do. " 'You shall have It,' said Mary. 'Walt a bit and I'll get the cork out' "So saying she turned her back to them and was busy with the bottle for a minute before she handed it over to tho men. 'I'm afraid, she said, 'that It may not agree with you, consider ing how little you've-eaten, but If you Insist on It I suppose you must have It.' "Within half an hour after the men had emptied the bottle they began to complain of terrible pains and pretty soon they were all rolling in the bot tom of the boat in agony. Before night every blessed one of them waa dead and Mary and I had hove them over board. "I smelt the brttle and I smell strychnine. How it not into the bot tle I didnt know and I didn't try to know. "After that we were alone In the boat, and, considering there was only two of ua, I waa able to serve out enough bisoult every day to keep us from actual suffering, though, ot couree, we wore always pretty hungry. "Mary scorned as happy as a bird. She sang to me and cooed around me and did her level best to make me love her. "Two daye after we were left alone I went to the breaker to draw some water and I found that It had nearly all leaked ouT. I found the leak and stopped It, but there wasn't more than a gill of water left In the boat "For the first time since left the wreck the woman seemed to grow ser ious and she asked me several times how long a man could live without water and how long we could make the gill of water last. "I told her and then laid down for a nap. When I woke tip I was lying on a pillow made of her shawl she used to wear around her ahouldera. But Mary waa gone and that'a the last I ever heard of her. "I understood in a minute what she had done. I had told her that per haps one man might live on a gill of water for three or four days and she had gone overboard so as there should not be but one mouth to be wet wltbj water. "Yes, as I was saying.g women are a nuisance at sea, but when I saw that poor woman's shawl folded so carefui under my head and saw that she was gone I wished that It had been me In stead of her." Boston Globe. THE BABY WOULDN'T CRY. How Edl.ua Finally Secured tha l'hono graphlo Record ol It. Woe. Here is a story they tell over tha teacups la Orange, N. J., where Edi son lives: The phonograph came to the Edl aon laboratory and the first baby to tho Edison home about the same time, and when the baby was old enough to say "Goo-goo" and pull the great lnventor'a hair in a most disrespect ful manner, the phonograph was near enough to perfection to capture the baby talk for preservation among the family archives. So Mr. Edison filled up several rolls with these pret ty lnartlculations and laid theni care fully away. But this was not sufficient Tha most picturesque thing about the baby's utterances was Its crying, and the record of thla its fond father de termined to secure. How it would entertain him in his old age, ha thought, to start the phonograph a golng and hear again the baby walla of his first-born. So ona afternoon Mr. Edison tors himself from his work and climbed the big hill leading to his house. He went in a great hurry, for ho is a man who grudges every working moment from his labor. A Workman follow ed at his heels carrying the only pho nograph that at that time had been Bufflcieiwly completed to accomplish really good results. Reaching home and the nursery Mr. Edison started the phonograph and brought the baby in front of it. But the baby dlds't cry. Mr. Edison tumbled the youngster about and rumpled its hair, and did all sorts of things, but still the baby didn't cry. Then he made dreadful faces, but the baby thought they were funny, and crowed Joyously. So back to the lab oratory went Mr. Edison in a very un pleasant frame of mind, for the baby's untimely good humor had cost him an hour of work. The phonograph was also taken back. But he did not give up. The next afternoon he went home again, and the phonograph with him. But If the baby was goodnatured the day be fore, this time it was absolutely cher ubic. There was nothing at all that Its father could do that did not make the baby laugh. Even the phono graph itself, with its tiny, whirring wheels, the baby thought was meant for its special eiuertalnnient, and gurgled Joyously. So buck to work the Inventor went again, with a tem per positively ruffled. The next day and the next he tried It, but all to no purpose. The baby would not cry, even when waked suddenly from sleep. But to baffle Edison is only to in flame his determination, which, by the way, Is one of the secrets .f his success. So ot length, afta much thought, he made a mighty resolve. It took a vast amount of determination on his part to screw himself up to the point of committing the awful deed, but he succeeded at last, and one morning when he knew his wife was down town, he went quietly home with the phonograph and stole into the nur sery, where the baby greeted him with customary glee. Starting the machine Mr. Edison or dered the nurse to leave the room. Then he took the baby on his knee and bared its chubby little leg. He took the tender flesh between his thumb and finger, clenched his teeth, shut his eyes tight and made readv to yes, actually to pinch the baby's leg. But Just at the fateful moment the nurse peeped through the door, nnd perceiving the horrid plot flounced in and rescued the baby in the nick of time. Mr. Edison breathed a mighty sigh or reiier as he gathered up the phono graph and went back to the laboratory. He then gave up the project of phon ographlng the baby's crying. But not long afterward he accom plished his purpose after all, and quite unexpectedly, too. As soon as the baby waa old enough to "take notice" its doting mother took It down to the la boratory one aunny day, and when tha big machinery was started a-roarlng, the baby screwed up Its face, opened its mouth and emitted a series of woe ful screams that made Mr. Edison leap to his feet. "Stop the machinery and start the phonograph!" he shouted, the record of his baby's crying was theu and there accomplished. Now Ycrk Tier aid. A Proof of Or.Htneu, OrwU writers sildom write lu a hid that Is legible, and a great elo cutionist can deliver the simplest of compositions in such a wiy that nut one person in a liuadrod can tell what U Is all about, Button Transcript. ALEXANDER BROTHERS & CO. DEALERS IN Cigars, Tobacco, Candies, Fruits and ITuts SOLE AGENTS FOR Henry Mail lard's Fine Candies. Fresh Every Week. 3Pjl,132z Goods .a. SrEciALTY. SOLE AGENTS FOR F .F. Adams & Co's Fine Cut Chewing Tobacco Bole agents for the following brands ot Cigars- Hoary Clay, Loadros, Normal, Indian Triacess, Samson, Silver Ash Bloomsburg Pa. "A handful of dirt may be a house ful of shame." Keep your house clean with SAPOLIO B. F. Sharpless, j?res. BLOOMSBUR LAND IMPROVEMENT COMPANY. Capital Stock, $30,000. Plotted property is in the coming business centre of the town. It includes also part of equal in desirability for residence UtiUlUii. JLUl'S are ottered in a short time. No such opportunity can be had elsewhere to make money. Lots secured on SMALL MONTHLY PAYMENTS Maps of the town and of plotted property furnished on ap plication. Call upon or write to the Secretary, or J. S. "Woods, Sales Agent, or any member of the Board of Directors." BOARD OF DIRECTORS. B. F. Sharpless; J. L Dillox. C. W. Nel, - A. G. Briggs, Dr. I. W. Willits, Dr. H. W. McReyxolds, N. U. Fuxk. 11-19- THE POSITIVE CURE. ELY BROTHERS. M Warren SC. New Tort Price 60 eU.1 ORGANIZED. THE SOUTH CENTRAL CONSOLIDATED GOLD MINING AND MILLING CO. (INCOKl'OBATED.) CAPITAL STOCK - - - $2,000,000. Bbares i oo each, Full Paid nnd Mun-Asaesaable. (Issued In payment for this Company's Mines.) TREASURY RESERVE STOCK, $300,000. 7 GOLD. " 1 out t n. a. Gilbert Mlkkelson, Slev w rWSS$turXZVM as- capltali T,h? M,"e are PRODUCERS, and will be Worked for Dividends. .An'roe oTPaDy'8 TrJaS"ry Slock now b PPcts. is J CENTS A SHARE. Certain to advance and yield ten to hundred told on the par. $25. OO Cash Buys $200.00 Full Paid Stock, and In that proportion more or less. j Now is the time to buy. Price will advanced hv to nolnts a! a time in i nn nor as the new production of the mines Increases. The stock III be nVted i,J ri,S "Lu r. rapid y. The company's consolidated mines have very I. re Heserves "ori s ! n ! bvM sls. f" stock 1 k'" 7. " "V .' 1 .? "ineni sent on appllc nviinun ,, n :""'"' ,., uu. t';1 ort'i.ecK lor amount , ... , ...,,, , nMj,-f.t) 10. o.'nu 11111 directions with Address application for shares to Trensiirer Nnutli (-tit,H Mitrrct: Hld'if . m. I.ouIm, mo. 7 7' -",0 V' - - i rj jgfstf. IsAn -Antidote TRY' IT AND 5EE YOUR STORE iWHOJSTOMERS. N. U. Funk, Sec, C. II. Campbell, Treas. the factory district, and has uo purposes. at values that will be doubled livVLriUn Owns a Rich Group of Ten Gold Mines, Located In Carson Mlnluir District, Owyhee County, Idaho ; a district which has produced OVER $ 10,000.000,00 OFFICERS AND DIKECTOHS. P?,i,E?7.Co.V w; Mro,1ers. Capitalist and Heal Estate Owner: and of . H. Kroiliers & Co., Hoorers, M. Louis. J ics 1'kks T-Ciipt. J A. Ware, Katlroad Contractor, St. Louis. 'I " a.-,",' ,- V"frll?. W. K. Wernse & Co., Iovestment Brokers, 8t. Louis, also l'res't. Banker s hubllshlntf Co., and l'res t Guarantee Loan and Mortice Co P Bi0?i If .TT ',n .'.lf .e ot V,n- 'l lrre Son9. Tlrre Coal Co , St. Louis : also Pres t l'rlnce Arthur Mining '., old Mines nernse. t'as h cr w v. Vnw,. i n . at ini. demonstrated at Ion. wanted. Dellverv application. al Cnnptolldatrd II unit ol Com. t-S-tt. Ii-BU1NE!;; DULL 1 WITH" YOU ? mm .i ir Dull i let or NuslMuu), Merchant Tailor. Cleveland Ohio. Jifi,nii i'l'h 21 l'P"(1,'1H' K'Miney Hpence, Hartford City, Ind. 12 I alii ILook Merc ! Do you want a Do you want nn 0$$& ? Do you want a Do you want nnv kind of n MUSICAL, IN STRUMENT? Do you w ant SHEET MUSIC? If so, do not send your mon ey away from home, but deal with a reliable dealer right here, who will make things right, if there is anything wrong. For anything in this line the place to go is to 3 Salteer's. Ware-rooms, Main Street, be low Market. THE MARKETS. BLOOMSBURG MARKETS. COBRICTID WIIELT. RBTAIL PBICS9. Butter per lb $ ,ao Eggs per dozen 14 Lard per lb ul Ham per pound .12I Pork, whole, per pound ,06 Beef, quarter, per pound . 07 to .10 Wheat per bushel , . . .80 Oats ' " 4S Rye " " 65 Wheat flour per bbl 3.60 Hay per ton 12.00 lo 14.00 Potatoes per bushel, .75 Turnips " " ,a Onions " " 1,00 Sweet potatoes per peck 25 to .30 Tallow per lb .1 Shoulder " " , Side meat " " to Vinegar, per qt 0? Dried apples per lb .05 Dried cherries, pitted ,ia Raspberries " .14 Cow Hides per lb 3l Steer " " 2 CalfSkin .80 Sheep pelts "75 Shelled corn per bus .75 Corn meal, cwt a. 00 Bran, Iao Chop ' j.aS Middlings " i.ao Chickens per lb new .t, old 22 Turkeys " " ,s Geese " " Ducks " " io Coal. No. 6, delivered 9.40 " 4 and 5 " 3 50 " 6 at yard 2.$ " 4 and s at yard 3.25 ...r 1 ro TninrTrr tCAVtAia.lMULMAKKS CA I OBTAIN A PATENT f For K2?IP:. 'wer nd an honest opinion, writ to ItlliM4 ( l who have bad nearly tlflT year.' xpertenoe In the patent buaint'M. Conimunica tlona auiotljr confidential. A Handbook of In. formation concerning rntmit and bow to ob tain them aent free. Also a oatalouun ot mechan ical and aolentlHo hooka mul trim. Patents taken tlirouitli Muun A Co. recely pacial notice in the Mrlenllllc American, and tbua ar bruuiiut widely before the public with, put cost to the Inrentor. 1'hia apleudld paper. Issued weekly, elesantly Illustrated, baa by far tha lamest circulation of any scit-ntltlo work lu the world. S.'l a year. Sample copios sent free. Building Ediuoo. monthly, aj.dua year. Hingis Copies, centa. Kvury nuuilier contains beau tiful plates. In oolors, and photOKrapUs of new bouses, with plans, euabllnii builders to show the latest designs and secure contracts. Address minu a co, mw vouk, aui buoauwat. uiuiwruinuinmaimumrmtiiiuiuruumni Glass! Quick! There'11 lota of annp and vim In thla 11 lines' ltooTHKKH. There's lola of l'loaiiiire and kooi! heal Hi In lu too. A de licious drink, a toiuper 11 nee drink, a home made drink, a drink tlutt dellulita the old nd yotiujr. lie sure end nut the guuulne HIRES'Rooto " packsis aki 6 ftlloas, loll smywkara. THB CHAS. E. HIRES COMPANY, PHILADELPHIA, PA, mil" iniimi.miiii.i. ...... W6to ? 9 i IK) 5-17H.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers