THE COLUMBIAN. BLOOMSBURG, PA. THE REMORSELESS BARBER' Exit rU'tc ot u Irturer with the llalr Trimming Flnnil. T.'.e wild uii'ovorunblo jmsslon a barlT litm fir trlitimliix your lialr! tm t!n -1th f IhvffulHHr I vn in ltiw ton, iliiaknitt .ilxitit Itx-ttire 1 wiw ox IMTioil (Ii'Uvcr in tho ?vmi1h8, find m Ki.lly s.-m1 that I couldn't ro nitMiilxT tln sulijivt mr what It wan uhour. 1 wont Into n Tromont trvt "Itwtltutv of Pacini Manipulation mid T-i:s,.i-l.il I 'iViTiillon." iiu l liupilrod for tho professor who occupUM tho hrilr of Nl'MiMoval Shaving nl Nluo iconth (Vimiry .SbsiniHxj. One of thy Junior niiiulNni of th faculty, who was hrusliiiiK an uniiiTjrraltiato' cunt poluhHl mo to n. chair, and I clltnll iu. Whon tlu iHTforiuanco was about coni'liidiil, th' harbor wald to me: "ll.iv" your hair trlmmod. sir?" , 1 l'liOVt Hot. "Needs it very badly, sir," ho paid; "liMiks very r.i(d." 1 uovot ariruo with a barber. I said: "All rlirht. trim It a Halo, lmt dou't juako It uuy shorter." luuiutli.i;--! he trimmed nil the cull out of It, and my hair naturally, you know, lias a very graceful curl to it. 1 uovor iliscoviaiMl this myself until n fow month aco, uoid then I was wry much urpri!l. I discmI 1t tr looking at my lithograph. , Well, nuy'now, ho trinimeil It. On the tith of PimviiiIht 1 was at Bath, Maine. Aalu I was ahaved, and nsaiii tho Iwirbor Imploivd me to i.-t htm rrlni my hair. AVhon 1 an vrcl hint that It had 1mhu trimmed inly two days IWoro, ho spitefully tutktfd where it was done. I told him, nd ho gave oxprtssLn to n burst of Kareastic laughter. "Well. well, well." hp :ild at last. "o yon let t V.imii trim your hair In Uoston. Well, well. Now you look !'ke :i who has Kvu around tho vorll e-u.iL;'j to know lH'ttor than tlint." Then !i" .iP'.-.'tod to osamino a lvk -r two vry particularly, and sighed 5ivlly. "Uoar, liir," ho said, "I don't know really, as I could do anything with that liair or not; H'n too lmd." Well his manner frichtoncd n and I told hi tn to go ahead and trim it, Jut House not to make It nny shorter. "No." he said, "oh. no, it wasn't jRvess.iry to out It any shorter; It was really too short now, but It did tn-d itriuimiui;." So ho "trimmed" it, and when I faced the Rockland audience that iiljrht, I l ooked llk a prize lighter. In four days from that time I was Klttinit In the chair of a burlier down in New York State. He shaved me In jrrareful ttilenee, and then thoupht fully ruu his Hugom over my lonely Ixalr. "Trim thU hair a little. Kir?" he saW, "straljfhteu it up almut the odpes?" 1 Ureekly tolil him I had it trimmed twice during the preceding wvek. and I wa afraid It was gettluj? too short t v winter wear. "Yea," he said, "ho didn't know but what it was pretty short, but you didn't need to out it any shorter to tfdm It It was in very bad. rapped shape at the etuis." 1 remained silent aud obstinate, and tie nflked me where I had it trlmmoi lat I told him and ho burst Into a liliout of huij-'htcr riiat made the win dows rattle. "What's the matter, Jim?" inquired nn assistant partner down tli,' rix-.tn. Aoldrnp his at.lout In tho ehair by th nose- .Ilm fitiflM hi lauphter and n'plkxl: "This pentleiiwn had his hair trim med down In Maine." There was a penoral burst of merri ment nil over the shop, and tlie ap 'pi'entlce laid down the Iwush ho was wn.llnp nnl cinie over to look at the Miii.. r-it. Tic: t h inlpht never for pet it 1 surrendered. "Trim It a little, then," I prou.mxl. "but In tlvo name of humanity don't cut it any bortT." "No," the barlier said, "he wouldn't roakB It a hair's breadth shorter." Whoa I left that shop. If It hadn't ren for my oars, my hnt would have fallen down clear on my shoulders. When I reached the hotel, everylxxly started, and a couple of men pot up and read a handbill on the wall, des criptive of a convict who had recent ly escaped from Sinp Slnp, and looked from the bill to tnyoelf very intently. That nipht several of the audience 1rew revolvers as I came out on the rlatforui. Then 1 went to Amsterdam, X. Y. The barber of that eloepy vllhipe. vho, in the Interval of his other du ties acts a mayor of the town, aud edit the local papers, undertook to shave me with a piece of hoop Iron he pulled out of his boot lep. When I resisted he went out into th kitchen and came back with a kitchen knife and a can-opener, and offered me my choice. I selected the can opener, and he bepan the massacre, remarklnp In cidentally that he used to keep a pood sharp spoke shave for his particular rustonwrs. but he lost It Then ho raid my hair needed trlmminp, very iiailly. I protested that it wa Im possible, it had been trimmed three tlmos within ten days, and was as Bhort now as a business man on the 1m of January. "Oh," h said. "It wasn't too short, and bestdo there wasn't no style about it at all." He could plve it some ehape. however, ho said, without mak ing it auy shorter. So I surrendered and told him to shape ft up. And if that foredoouxl. abandoned, Amsterdam sou of an .ikum picker didn't po out into the wwvdshed ami come back with a rusty old horse rii!p and bepan to fll away what linle hair I had left. He allow ed a few shemls and patches to re main, however, cliupiug nero aud there to my scalp in phostly louell ns I rather feared that my ap !iJnnoe that evening would cr-ate a tianie, but It did not I observed that the majority of the audience bad their heads "shaped up" after the same maimer, and were rather pleased with ay conformity to the local custom aud Myle. Well. I pot alone to Corry, Pa., and rushed in for a shave and got it in no time and two motion. "Hair trimmed, airy (ho barber mi I supposed he was spenklns sarcas tically, and so I lauphed, but very feubry, for I was petUnjj to be a little eruritiv on the subject of my hair, or ratiwr my Uk heir. But be re peated fala quention, and said that It neatled trimming very badly. 1 told him that rtaa what ailed ft, it had bo trlmmd to death; why, 1 aald, my hair bmt been trhacnwl ftve time duriop the last thirty days, and I JTM ttBUd it . KWldft't liMt mucb lonper. "Well." lie aM. "It was hardly the thin tor u man of my lmiicslvo up Harancl, who would lKituralty at tract attontlon the inonutit I entered n rni (I had to stnnl on t.lptox and hold on with both hnnds to hok over the Imck of n car seat) to p around with such a head of htlr. when hi! could Rtralphtcn rt out for me In a minute." 1 told him to po nlKvul, and 'lowd my eyes, ami woudoivd wlmt would come ncJrt. That fellow took n pair of dentist's for;ep aud "pulled" every lck of hair I had left "There," he said proudly, "ikw when your hair prows out It will prow out win." I was a little dismayed at nrst when I looked at my pllMtvtilnp poll, but til tor all It was a relief to know that tho end was reached, and Uolxnly could torment me apaln to have my hair trimmed for several wwk. Hut when 1 pot sliav.il nt Ashtabula, tho barber iiwiNtxil on pnttyltip up the holed and ulvlnp my head a co:it of shellac. 1 yielded, and my head look ed like a varnished plolv with the maps left IT. Two days after. I sat In a barlh-r's chair at Mansfield. Tho bai'lier shaved me silently. Then he IKiuscd. with a Uittlc poisi-d In tia liand, and seld: "SlwmpixV" 1 nnvere,l hltn with a look. Then ho olhil my hairless ploln and lxnt over It for a moment with a hairbrush. Then he said: "On which side do you part your hair?" Kolwt J. Hurdette. Ancient nml Meillnpval C.'hrmltry. The workmen who dyed clothes, cloth In p aud tapestries iu purple or other colors, an industry practiced first In Epypt and Syria nud then In nil the. Grveiau, Koman aud rirsian world, not to svak of the extreme East em ployeil hlphly developed ehemlc.il manipulations; aud the cloths found on the inttmmlo and In the sarco. phiiitl attest their icrfcvtioii. Tllny nnd Vltrnvitts descriU- In detail the production of colors, such as cinnabor or verm'.llou, minium, nvl chalk, in llpo. black, preen and blue col.s-s, vepetnble iui well as mineral, perform ed by painters. The chemistry of alimentation, fruitful la resources and in frauds, was next practiced. Thi art was known of accomplishing at will tlnwo dflicatw fertiK'titatlons which produce bread, wine ami leer. and which nuKllfy a larpe number of fivxls; also of falslfylnp wine by the nddlrlon of plaster and other Ingred ients. The art of healinp, sec kins everywher for resources apalnst dia e;ue, had learned t transform and fabricate n larpe numUr of mineral and vepetable products, such as supar of poppy, extracts of ulphrshades. osldo of copper, verdlprls, Irtharpe, white lead, the sulphurets of arsenic and arsenious add; remedies and polMons were composed at the eame time, for different purposiw, by doe tors and mapioians. The ninnufac ttire of arms and of Inflammatory sub stances mkuni. sulphur, renins and bitumens had already, nncieijtly as well as In our own time, drawn uion the talents of Inventors and piven rise to formidable applications, especially In the arc of slopes and marine bat tloa, previous to the Invention of the Greek fire, which was in Its turu the precursor of punjwwder ami of our Urrihle expVwive matters. l'opular Science Monthly. i A Story LUK'lon Told Grant. Chronologically the talk had come to Grant's Journey enct to mssuuio pen eral "c.ininand, and Ms first lueetUtp with L.in..-oln. "Uld he glw you his lmire!lon of Lincoln hen he return ed from that Interview 7" I asked. "Not exactly," answered Col. Grant. "You nee, 1 was with hi in at the time." "In Washhipfon?" "Yes; In Washington and In the White House with him and Lincoln." "Is It true that Lincoln quoted a story about Capt Bob Shorty and the Mackerel Hripnde from the Orpheus C. Kerr papers to your father at that meeting?" I asked. "Very likely; though I don't remem ber. Tho story that I do remember henrlnp him tell my father that day was about Jocko. Jocko was the com mander of an army of monkeys In a monkey war, and he was always sure that If his tail was a little lonper he could end the monkey war. So he kept nykinp tho authorities of the monkey republic for more of a tall. They pot other monkey tails and spliced them on his. His spliced tall pot too long to drag after hint, and they wound it around his body. Still he wanted uiore. and they wound his spliced tall about his shoulders. Fin ally it pot t-o heavy that It broke his back. Mr. Lincoln applied the story to the cases of generals who were al ways calling for more men and never did anything with them. They talked about the campaign, but In a desult ory way. I remember Mr. Lincoln's Raying, 'I don't give many military orders. Some of those I do plve I know are wrong. Sometimes I think that all of them are wrung " Mo Cure's Magazine. Fat'l Ingenuity. An Irishman on oue occasion passil a grocer's shop, and seeing u pile of chtH'ses on the counter, mid noticing the shopman had left the shop, thought it a pood opiorruuity to pet a cheese for nothing. He therefore stepped lightly into the shop, und taking a couple of cheeses, placed ooe on each side of the scales. The shopman, hearing tho noise, came from tlu back shop and a-sked I'at what he was about "eh," said Tat "dont annoy your self; I only wished to know if your ehiMtte or mine Is the heaviest" "Like your confounded cheek," ald the shopman, angrily; "if you don't take your cheese out of this at once I'll set the police on you." Tat lifted tins cbtvse, nud, smiling at the trick he had performed, kulu the shopman a respectful good-day. Fallowing Prophet. A false prophet has arisen on the Island of Jamaica. He usichos Unit God has lveu him power to make a new Itethesda or a small river on tho Island. Every Wednesday ho Mauds on a rock in the stream and blcsacd tlw waters, which are then supposed to havo the power hcalring any disease The iiatl'-es are crazy Iu tho fanatic belief In e new prophet, and 20.0DO ptbjriina day Ui-toc in tho water. - WOMEN CRIMINALS. v-n. The lt rori They Ilnve Made as Murderer I a Bad One. Continuing his discussion of the In-crease- III the uumbor of female crltnl lulls In Europe and America. Ir. Hugo Miiench, thu eminent ltTlln locloloplot sold to a St Iiouls) reHr tor: "Tin' woman who captivated more hhmi In a given time aud spout more money In better stylo than any other in Paris was Miss Sutlnrland, a New York girl. Josle Mansfield was nliiKint as notorious in tho French capital ns in the American nctroolis. It was an American leauty, Miss lU.iekford, who captivated the Rus sian Grand Puke and held him In ab ject slavery for matiy months. Aud, po whre you will throughout Europe, yon will find the greatest swath in the way of high class crime is being ott by American women. Investiga tion has shown me that tho number of Hdvoiiuirowstn iu New York Is some thing startling uiiMt of them made so by the iioevsslrJos of American high pressure life. "In the more serious class of crimes women are on an equality with men. In cm' line of luiquity of tho blackest dcrlprlm, poisoning, they surpass men. Poisoning has over boon a wo man's crime. lth In ancient and modern times. Jocosta, Catherine do Medici, Lueretla Borgia, the March tones dc Hriuvilliers iu-e familiar ex amples in point. And in thia coun try, out of seventy-two cases of pois oning, of which count has been kept during the last nineteen years, fifty eight have been atumptd by women. To such an extent has poisoning by women been carried that in a case of scvcalled mysterious poisoning the de tectives turn to look for a female, and seldom turn In vain. "As murderers, women have In the nineteenth century len making a Moody record. Account for It as phil osophers or moralists may. the facts sii'tn to show that since woman hos asserted her rights to struggle for her self with the world on the same triii8 ns man she has likewise struggled violently, and often murderously, with men and women. Tin number f mur deresses In the nineteenth century has teen as great as the numler of hero ine. Nor have the murdercasv been confined to the uuder class, outside, as it were, of the restraints of civiliza tion. On the contrary, thce have been more murders or killings com mitted by women in large cities, or civilized eomiuiroltle'S. than on the frontiers or border lands. Women know very well that in America, at least, there is n sentimental prejudice against hanging one of their sex, and. with their characteristic cunning, they are taking advantage of this fact" Sham Knowledge It Is easy enough to learn what the gypsies would call the "patter" of various professions. One can dls cotirse kirnedly, on leaving a conivrt hall, concerning the value of th? nitwic he has hiwd; or he may criticize a picture, with the proper reference to "fortshorteolng," "high tights," "middle-distance," and the rest of rt "It Is a fine poetn; yes, a very flue poem," Bald a would-be critical friend to an author, "but you will excuse me for saying I don't think you hare a perfect understanding of the souuet form. The pause hardly comes In the right place." Tho author bowed and smiled mer rily; and afterwards a common friend said to him; "You seem to take criticism very cheerfully. Fred." "Bless you!" said he, "that isn't criticism, but 't amuses Tom to de liver it The poem ho was talking about isn't n noiuwt at all. It has nineteen lines." Agassis was once asked what he thought of an attack made on his scientific position by a certain scholar and tit taker who had a book knowl edge of the different theories advocat ed by the representatives of science, and decided that Agassis must be ranked in the second or third class. He burst into a roar of laughter. "Why, Just think of It" he said, "he undertakes to fix my place among zoologists, and he is not a zoologist himself. Why, he has never even been an observer!" It often happens that the men who really know a subjoct from beginning to end, so far as a human being may, are those who have least time to talk about it So there are long silences to bo tilled by the people who are con telnt with seeming to know, and few of them havo the self-control to resist tho temptation. A Tariff EOerU The young woman' father was one of those men who talk tariff so much that in time they learn to disregard the comfort of their families and talk it in the home circle. Thus it was that tho girl knw as much about the tariff ai she did about housekeeping. Yet she found time in the midst of her political economy to have a couple of real sweethearts, not to speak of a host of fellows who wanted to be. Of the two favored ones, one was a farmer's son and the other was n swell youth from the city. This lat ter she In time chose as the om and when her fa.tht-r heard of it he called her t-fre him. "So," he saJd, "you have thrown over this cxciJlent. young farmer and chosen a city dude?" "Y. papa," she smiled. "Well. I don't like it and I want to know your reasons for doing it." "They are plain enough." she. re sponds! promptly. "I have heard you talk tarliT until 1 nm thoroughly con vinced tlmt the only kind of protec tion I nei-d in my home industrh-s exclude the raw material and admits the liaishod iroduet." i, A CurliMlty of the Lav. 'Additions to rented promises, when made by the tenant should never t fastened with nails, but with screws, says a St Ijouls lawyer. The reason for this lies ru the fact that should he wlh to move away and take with him tlie boards and other lumber com posing the improvements he has made lie can simply draw out tho screws and take the planks. If he fastt-ns them with valla, however, he can re move nothing, and the Improvements become the landlord's projterty. The. fact results from a legal quibble, in sisting that artick fastened with screws ore for tantporary use, and If put In place by th tenant are bis own property. - - - ELKHART CARRIAGE and HARNESS MFG. GO. No. 37. Burro? Uurneu. 1 97o' Ifftre paid to (imnnm rW ! rear, r-tiTinff them thu denler'i profit. We nr thn Olrtrataml I.ai-sent mftnti fuel nrerfl In Anior Iratnlllnir Vehlrlpa n6 HurnoM this wat hlp with prlvtlpff in etftmlne befnre nttT inorer In pun. We !t fiwiiht hnih wnriK rrnt nntltnf l ev. Warrant fur 2 rear. Wtiy par nn nnnni til) to 1.10 to onler fnr ymi? Wrle rmir own order. !!mnfre. W talis all ruk vt duio in blpplna. WHOLttAtf PRICES. Borln Waarona. 3l to 30. onnmnt.c, in aaMllfui KtttotM. Surrevs, 969 to SIOO mm a eell tor 1100 to i.m. Top BunRies, 37.80,rlnnMfirrM. phestone.SOO to ioo. Farm Wsarons, Waaroniitee, Milk Wantons, Delivery W?n' Road Carts, aiiKLKS rua nuir.fi a luiLDKr.s. Ko.;id. TopBusgr. $43.00 5k. Ito.3, rana Wagoo. anMlaat JsMi , 7T. It ll-n-r, trawJWiiMajtji I N TM1 Uiirr.'T. No.727, Uoad Vaon, $55 titu ss.c Ko. 1, rarm name... Kiui-tH a.uiDLXS aaarLT MiTS. Klktiartnicyle,58ln.whonl, errreat. at" IW eaaa villi aear, HrnA 4. la pnmimatio llren, wvlcllesa ataaipa te paaiaaa 1 eaimlovM. att'ol tubiDif, drop fortilnKB. Addm. W.B.PRATT, Sec'y, ELKHART, IND. "Where dirt gathers, waste rules." Great saving result from the use of MP !1 IV ran iimfi' Fi aiairiiTl tup DrtciTiwr r i it? rr P1J I I I K 1 Wlliwas ww.l a a j22a ELT BROTHERS, M Wvran BU,Kew Tort Friro 60 cU.1 ,4 mm Long Tales told about manure won't raise paying crops. Baugh'4 manure is all manure. A ton of good manure costs no more than a ton of poor manure. Write for samples and information. BAUGH & SONS COMPANY, Manufacturers of RAW BONE MANURES, 20 South Delaware Avenue, - Philadelphia. I AM NOW A ill AN! Chlouo,Oot ft,lP. "I wm trooblftd with amliMion and Tricoci, and had bean Minnllj wk for vaa fAarm, Iurina the l&Mt four vettra I triftd every remMr that was sold HI WAt. and sot no relief for any of mr trouble until I took CA LTHO Ucri aad rvstort'd air and 1 am auw a aiaa," I a.irMt ttwm m ef ! af Uiiwuanifia t w,) Address VON MOHL CO.. Sole tall mm I till a'TgM'laVlllllMaaamaBaawataaga1 aMBBamaaatlaTialfnilVJaVjafll We will aenrl you the Ttinr- B ,ciuu, ricmti uicpuraiiou CALTH08 ret, by aealcU mail, and a legal guarautce that Calthos will STOP VJZtil O II D IT 1raiatrrhea,Varl VUAC oeccle, aud RESTORE Let VUror. Use it pay if satisfied. American Agents, Cincinnati, O. i J B. F. Sharpless, Pres. N. U. Funk, Sec C. II. Campbell, Treas. OB LOOMSBUR CO LAND IMPROVEMENT COMPANY Capital Stock $30,000. Plotted nroDertv & in tliP AX" 11. a a y "O C Ul I lit! town. It includes also nart nf trip tWat-w ;of:.-,f t,.. . "v"v'; ami una UO equal in desirability for residence purposes. nirnrAT' t ah.i , . ,r . .... nvjiKsij tiUio are onerea at values that will be doubled in a short time. No such opportnnity can be had elsewhere to make money Lots secured on SMALL MONTHLY PAYMENTS Maps of the town and of nlotted . . - x i -j . . , .uiuiomu uii ap plication. 1 Call upon or write to the Secretary, or J. S. Woods, Saks Agent, or any member of the Board of Directors. BOARD OF DIRECTORS. B. F. Sharpless; J. L Dillo.w tSE,Lw m r A - BRIGG8' Dr- 1 W Wittiw, Dr. 1. W. McRey.nolds, , u Fuxk. 1 1-19-tf -GIVEN TO- !R E P A I R I N C WATCHES CLOCK JEW SHY -AT- J. Ck Eyes examined free of charge. J. G. "WELLS. Xook Merc ! Do you want u PiSKo ? Do yon want an ' 0 Wjt? 1 . 11 ) Hv!.- y-si.- :.-v mi Do you want a Do you want anv kind of a MUSICAL IN STRUMENT? Do you want SHEET MUSIC? If so, do not send your mon ey away from home, but deal with a reliable dealer right here, who will make things right, if there is anything wrong. For anything in this the place to go is to line 3. Snltzer's Ware-rooms, Main Street, be low Market. THE MARKETS. BLOOMSBURG MARKETS. COHRICTID WEKILT. K1T1IL PBICI3. Butter per lb .16 Eggs per dozen .16 Lard per lb .l Ham per pound .14 Tork, whole, per pound 07 to .08 Beef, quarter, per pound, . . .06 to .08 Wheat per bushel .70 Oats " " .45 Rye " '". .65 Wheat flour per bbl 3.00 Hay per ton 16 00 to iii.oo Potatoes per bushel, old co " new.... 1. 25 Turnips " ' jj; Onions " " 1.00 Sweet potatoes per peck 25 to .40 Tallow per lb .04 Shoulder " " 7.7... Side meat"" .10 Vinegar, per qt 07 Dried apples per lb 05 Dried cherries, pitted .12 Raspberries 12 Cow Hides per lb o Steer " " 03 Calf Skin 40 to .50 Sheep pelts , .60 Shelled corn per bus 60 Corn meal, cwt 2.00 Bran, " 1.00 Chop " 1.20 Middlings " 1.10 Chickens per lb. .10 Turkeys " .12 Geese " " .10 Ducks " " ...'." .'.,' .7 .' -I Coal. No. 6, delivered 2.4 " 4 and s " , 3 50 " 6 at yard 2.2S " 4 and s at yard. 3 5 Iff - PARKER'S . HAIR BALSAM CloanM and brii!fti ih rrniW a lnaui.nt fruwl. Unit Falla lo Boatora OrJ Hair tA if. VAi.ihful Color. mm K:a difjaw. a D" V, and! 1 m al lmffi"" k lAin lM,.i11T. I.,a,t iaa, j..m, Tk. a l.u " T IS 4 t.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers