Newspaper Page Text
C-DMSHED nVKHY Fill DAY MOUNINO
,nS COLUMBIAN IlUILDtNO NBA11 THE COUI1T
CHARLES B. BROCKWAY,
ICriltor nnil Proprietor,
las-Two Dollars a Year, psaWo In Advance.
ill descriptions executed with neatness and
mspaicu ill reasonauio raics.
STOVES AND TINWARE.
1 M. nuTEIlT, n cmcr ill stoves A;llnware,Ilii
i poll bind;, Malu st, west of Market. vUlilJ
r-nil MTCTZ. drnler in kIoVph nnil tlnnnrn
plain Bttcct, nbovo court houbo, vl-nlj
VJl) LOWDNIlKnG, MerchnntTnllor.Maln
'M uoor uuuvu jiniericaii House, vi-ihj
MOKtilS. Merchant Tailor nmt Agent lor
it Nnw l'crhaln Hcwllllr Machine, rnrnrrur
lire and Main fit., over Miller's store. v3-nM
DltUGS, CHEMICALS, Ac.
MTTZ. Drumrlst and Anolhcearv. Mnln hi..
telow Hie Post Otllce, vl-nll
vr.tt ltltOSb. Druggists nnd Aliotheciirles.
grower's bloek Mulu st. vl-iHJ
CLOCKS, WATCHES, AC.
IlYZtlPFINaF.ll. WntchcR. Hnerliiplm A-
ewelry Ac, Main Htiect near Went ut. 'i u!5
Oil I', urmui ill ,iui'kk, nineties III1U
leiulry, Slum at., Just below llio AuiorUuu
is UF.IlNHAKD. Watch and Clock maker.
far southeast corner Maluaud Iron sts,l-H
f I'ATHCAltT. Wnlch and Clock Maker.Mar-
kilstuct, below .Malu, vl-nll
BOOTS AND SHOES.
if millWN. Hoot nlul KhnplnnUpr. fVnlip
istreet, rear 01 nubbins & U) cr's sioie. vl-nll
fin 11KTZ. Hoot nnil Hhoemuiicr. Mnln si..
,elowllartniaii'H store, w est ol Mniliet. vl-JJ
UY KI.L'IM. Manufacturer nnil ilenler ill
Roots and Sjhucs, Gluccrlts, etc., Mnln htrtet.
II. C. HOWDU. Sjurgeou Dentist. Main st..
Btbui e Uie Com t House, vl-nll
w M. M 111. Ill it. Miiaeon 11 ml 1 hislflun.
Exihauge Mock o er We bb'a book stoi o 3-ius
, B, F. KINNF.Y, Huigeou Dentist. Teeth
tirncicd without i alni Main si., nearly on-
Sle hljlsiopul Cbuicli, vl-uhj
it. lKKLIUt. Attorney-at-Lnw, Olllee, Sid
Inor iuijxcuuugc.ijiijia,uiui uiu i-,xciiiingu
U. HAKICLEY. Attoiucy-nt-Law. Olllee. 2d
Dour In Lxchanbo Hlotk, near the "Exchange
McKF.LVY.M. D..Huri'enn nud riivhlelnn.
Eullhsidu Main hi., below Maikel. vlllU
It. r.VANH. M. D.. buiianu nnd Phsslclun.
luutli hide Main hti tel, below Market. vl-ull
I: HU'lTFlt, M. ). (surgeon and l'liyhlclan
iiaiKti hiuei, nuoic lain. vi-uu
. IUiIIIfeON. Allorliev.al I.aw. Ollleu llnit-
liau h buUdlot;, Mnln htui I. MMiLD
ILLINEItV & FANCY GOODS.
rMXItMAN, Millinery nnd Fancy CSoodh,
ij jiohiie j.iihfonai viiuicn, riain hi, vi-nia
Sh MZZIi: HAItKLHY. Sidllntr. ltamsey
fculldlng Main htitit, vl-uU
A. 11. WKHIS, rnncy aood, Notions,
kious, nnu hiniioneiy, ieii.iitgo iholk, jiuni
i M. DUUItlCKfeON. Mn Inery and Fancy
pxids.MuIll ht., belowMniilet. vl-ull
.:. KL1NL1. MUllurii i nd raucy OooiPt
Klalllhlliel below Mai Let. Vl-uln
JULIA A. & HADU IIAKKLBY. Ladles'
tluakH and DrehB l'attein.., houtlieahl coiner
caud westhH. vl-n4J
: MlShLS IIAIIMAN Millinery and Fancy
iult., MalUbt., b( low Ann ill an House, villi I
IIOTKLS AND SALOONS.
i.UMIHA HOll L. l. II. Slclmtr. Mnln s
kbe-U' Court House. ln
Kks IIOTIX, by T. Hint. Taylor, enst en1'
BLMYKIt & JACOIiY.l'mireetionerv. Ilakirv
kud Oj hler Saloon, w bolihalti and letatl. i:x
pit Illock, Main streit. vl-uU
5EU0I1ANTS AND GKOCEKS.
. MAHU. llrv (JooiIh nnd Notions, soutli.
i&UornirMalnaud IioubIs. vlm3
p.ni.r)iiuiii..iieaier in i-ry uoons, uro
trks, Itools, bnoes, Ac, corutr M.alu nnil
. MX'KLUY. Hoot and SIioh slore. boiikn
f tatlouery, Mnln St., below Market, vl-nlJ
BAC'OHs, Conieellouery, croccilcs etc., Main
II., lit low Iron vl-lii
IlKXDFNHAI.L, (Jenernl Sloeltot Merebnu
iw nnil Lumber, eoruei of Main slriet and
liiilctule and retail, Kxiliaiige IHock.'vl-u'li
!,'II0Wl.It, Hals rial Cnps, Hoots uuilbhnea.
r u.i, iiuuiu V..IUII. ILOllhU. VlUi
. bnnu'vi? llr.. n,.nl.,..
ger Mali, B'i, Ana Court liouso alley', vl-ul.1
tr-. ' " I'", i hut in tiry uooos, uro-
IpliK, etc., cor, Mnln nud Ceuti e Ms. vMH3
OIIITON. nrncprlpu .. Provlslnnn Mnln
piect below .Minuet. vl-nll
. EYF.lt. flrnfprli.t uti.l noiprnl Mcrpl,.,,i
N. Main ht.,nbove Wcbt. ' vl-11
ftLVY, Ni:AL A- CO., dealeis In Dry floods,
tueirles, Flour, Fe(il,hiill,Flhi.Iiiiu, Nails,
I. t. cor. Main and Maiket Us. vl-nll
PTMllti-.U A t-ON, dialer In Dry Goods,
v.-iiiiih, liueei-SMiiie, i-iour. Mill, hlioes.
sn,, .Aiiiuiiu iiiuea, iiiaiu hi. vi-uio
'IlMAN. Mnrble Woiks. onpilnnr lii-lnw
lOEtolllic, Malu btnet. V1-UI3
P0.VSI!iJHa LUMlli:il CO., manufacturers
Pjl dealers In Lumber of all kluds j riuulng
v, lUOllllllUUU, VilllU
lOSTKIl.Glno Maker, and White nud Fancy
puuei, neoiiuwn. VII117
I.CHItlhTMAN, Hnddle, Trunk a Hnrnihs-
f-uner, oiuve s iiiueit -iium nireei. juuj
' ltOUHINS.il nunr dealer second ilnrir iw.m
lortbwtst eoruer Mulu uud Iiuusts. Vl-uU
"iii,i'..iiAis, Agent lor Mtiiibon h uoiiner
ITHOUNTON, Wall l'nr, Window Hliadea
puAiures, rturiert oiock, juniusi,
("Ik, Miitu Jjtrett, west ol Market ht. vluil
.min'l T. 1... T...., !.....,.
JjOSENSTOCK.I'liolograiihcr, over llobbins
-.a mole, 1U1I1U hi Vl-lJ
I KIIHV .(....I... In H...I1..... ... r.
u'alicy,riarofAiiierlenu House, villi J
K A. FUNSTON & CO., mutual and cash
K.-.'ii'iiihuraucoconirnuiib.iJiower h jiuiiii
ton DIF.FFIONHACH, Hroom Factor'. Or.
E'intat Ills rekldeueo unit Millers Sou's
r i.uiuj.iiy nueu, liislgucu wisteru urusii
CADMAN, Cnbinelmnlter nud qinlr.
-.,.Wiiua .nun, birict on, jrou. yo-m.1
fcAMl'LlJ & C'o.,Mnclilnlsts,l'jist lllnoiiis-
( V,n . ... t. tiniuib's lUUllUUIBIll'l t
lwlilnery maJu nud leimlred. vii-ma
Bl.ltlVn, nr. ... ... .
liitirwiv ueaier in iiano, orenus nnu
'odun,Bt O, W,l'orcirlurulturo rooms
lk FifA n01IV' Miiiblc7nnd"llrown lston7
I iih,t.if'.,W,,,.,ry Fubllc, uorlbeutt corner
Leud Market st. M-nl1
1..- MHnHUBUuiBiirl (IIUU, Vl-UlO
llAllli . 1
l Vlllr..: ' "iir hi loriinure, iiuiias, ceuer
("""i ware, nenr llio Forks Holel, vl-nl5
rulers ill illy
u loutu ma ol lowu,
VOLUME IV NO 33.
& C. W. COLKMAN, Mercbant Tailors nnd
. Ucnt'S flirtllRllI ni irnnilM. Mnlti Hf..,ivt ilnr
to llio Hrlck Hotel, V1-1U7
II. llF.mttNG llltOTIlKll.Cnrrenlcrsnnd
. Uiillders, Main si., bcluw Flue. vl-n.7
HOWDH.t HIMlltlNO, ilenler In Dry Goods,
Groceries, Lumber aud general Meicliamllse,
Main st. . vl-nlJ
)U1CK IIOTF.L and rerreslinietit Saloon, bv
J HolirM'llcury cor.ol Main nndI'lnosl.,v-in'7
,11. O. A. Mi:OAllOi:i,,l'liyslclim nnd Murcenn,
Mnln sl next door to Good's Hotel vl-nri
AVID HIIUUINU, Flour amt Grist Mill, nnd
wmci m sriun, Mill nireei Vlt47
II. AC. KDLCHNF.lt, Illacksmltm, on Mill
atrcct, nenr l'luo. vl-n!7
1 L.MpWAllDH.riiyslclnnnna Kurucon, Mnln
! Bt.,llrst door nbovo M'Heury's Hotel. vl-n'JS
TAMDHU.HAltMAN, Cabinet Make: Mid Ull
i dertaker. Main HI., below l'lne. vl-nl7
JM. IIAHMAN, Snddlo nnd HallieSH maker.
, Main St., oipsite Finnic Church, van 1 1
SCHllYLDIt A- LOW, Iron lounners.MaelilnNts,
and Mauulactuiers of plows, illl HI. vl-n4
MILKH A. WILI.1AMH ACo,,Tniinersnud Man
ulacturers ol leallier, Mill Hlreet, vl-u!7
10 Oralu cradlo. Main Ht. vi!n5.
WILLIAM DHI.ONO Hhocmakerati.i manufac
11 tuier of Hrlck, Mill St., west of 1'iuo vluio
F. DALLMAN, Jlerchnnt Tailor, Becond SI.
Ilnbblus' lllllldllig. V2-H1S
it. J. K. IIOIIIIINH, Hiirt-eon nnd I'liyslclnn
iseronuisi,, ueiow aiiiiu. v-llis
IILHKUT & KLINi:, dry (joodi, groceries, anil
J general meichandlsc, Alain Htrent vli-uli:
I II. KIHTLKlt, "t'attawlsa House," North
1 . Corner Main nnd Second Streets. vinlf
Ki:iLi:il, Illllnid Saloon, Oysteis, nud Ice,
:j. Cream 111 hensou MaltiHt. '2ul2
II M. HIIOHST. ilenler in General Mprchalidlse
ill. Dry floods. Groceries A-c, v2-nls
QUKQUF.IIANNA or Hrlck Holel, S. Koslen-
kj bander l'ronrlelor.soulh-pnst ronier Mnln unit
1). HINAHD, ilenler iuHloves and rln-wnre,
Malu Street. vatila
M. 11. AHHOTT, Attorney at law, Main St.
F. O.MAN A Co., Wheelwrights, first door
nbovo school House. vlnltj
IOIIN A. OMAN, Manufacturer and dealer In
iJ Hoots ami Shoes, vlultl
T J. Linsint, M. I)., KurKcoii nnd Fliyslrlan.
Olllee at Keller's Holel. Mai!
1 )l'.Ti:U KNT, dealer In Dry Goods Groceries.
1 Hour. 1-ceil. halt, rish.llon. Nulls, etc.. Main
S. r.NT, ilenler In Stoves nnd Tin waro In
all Its branches. ' vlulO
1". IIMIGIl A1ID.A UUO.,dealer in Dry Goods,
Glocelles, and giuiial Mereliaudlse, vl'ull
JSPY HTDAM FLOUItING MILI, C.S. Fowler,
l!j l'mprletor. vi'nlu
I I). WDIiKHDI.SHIt.HootuudShooHtolcnud
nianillil;tiil v. Slum mi Mnln Ktrofl nu.
posltu Iho hteaill Mill. "Jul
rn W. i:iGAlt,Su'Uebaumi Flailing Mill and
X' iiox lauiuaeiory, vuu
jyj M. L'VICLLK,
ATT01tNj; AT LAW,
Ashland, Schuj Iklll Comity l'n.
Q W. MILLEll,
ATIOKM.Y AT LAW ,
uiuro i ouri House Alley, neiow inu i olujii-
I1IAS' IIIIW,,. lllilllltlpu 11.11 If. I'.ivr ,1,1,1 111 lull, lis
toiletted, Hloonisbuig l'a. bep.'Ju'ttf
JOBEHT F. CLAUK,
AllOIIKUY AT LAW,
Oftlce Main Strict below tbo Couit House.
J II. LITTLE,
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
OHico Courl-IIouse Alley, below the Coma
iiian Olllee, UIoonibburB l'a.
Q B. IUtOCKWAY,
ATTOItNEY AT LAW,
3-Ot'Fii'r. Court House Alley. In the Co-
1.VM1UAN building. Jnul,'C7.
J J M'UUUjVi UxN
ould uiiiiniincu it IhocHlzDiiHnf IIIooiiih-
u ru mill vicinity, that ho has lust received a lull
uud complete, nsboitment of
WALL PAl'LIt, WINDOW HIIADES,
FIXTUIthS, C0KD3. TAS.SCI.S,
nnd all other goods In lino of Inihliicss, All
tho newettL nud moht miL)iof (1 rattciiiH of tho
tiny aro alwaj b tu bu lomul In his I'stiiblUhnteiit.
IlKSTKIt S. FUHMAN,
IIAUNT-SH, HADDLK, AND TRUNK
aud denier lu
CAltniT-DAGH, VALIHI, FLV-N171St
nvrrALo jioiics, uoi&k-i:lanki.ts Ac,
which ho feels confident ho enn pell at lower
rnte tlinn any otlier perbon in tho county. Ex
amine for jourt-dvch,
HIiop third door below tho Court Houte, .Malu
htreet, Itioonibbuig, l'a,
Aug. 5, 1MU.
I M V L E S.
Tho Ullderstaned will ebpprfiitlv mnll fi'UVEl to
all uboMlsh it tho lteelpo and lull directions
or preparing and using a simple and Htautilul
Vegclablo Halm, thai will Immtdlatcly umovc
In,. 1,'tii.blcu IH,.,..li.u lll...nl.... n...l ..11
Hons nnd luipuritli soli tin r-klu. lea vlngthesauie
ton, i-ii-ui, I.UIIUII11 nun iieiiiuiiill.
Ho will also hend lsill.Fl ll strnctlniiH for tiro,
ducing.liy verysi niileiiitnus,alu.uilaiitgruwtli
of Hair on a baldlii ad or smootli laeo in less thau
tblily days lioui Hist applleatiim,
'iho nbovo tan beoblalned by letuin mall by
nildresslng '1 llos. F. CHAl'MAN, ( lieinlst.
i u. nux oia, iu,i jiroauway, sew lour.
pOWDEH KEGS AND LUMBEH
wild dealers in all kluds of
Klvo notice that they nro prepared tonccoinodat
heir custom with dispatch, nnd on the cheapen
rjOIIE BEST AND CHEAPEST
II A Y It A K E
IN THE M A II K E T.
VAMTAtU'lltn AND toil BALK 11V
N. AV. SAMPLE A CO.,
COI.UMHIA IKON WOI1KS, UI.OOMH
CALL AMI L.AUNi: IT,
Illoomsburg, June IP, iSTO-tf
"WriDMYEH A JAC01JY
aro ngeiiis fur the kale of " HroiK way's" Justly
celebinted Crinni mul old hloi k Alts, u bell lliey
Mill sell as eliiap as country brewtti nils' wlioln
and hslf lioiieN eoustuntly on linud, 'Uil ali
lu brewed by William E. Hrockway,3l5 loitS
liloonnburs, Juu. lo, l.TO-lv,'
lifylllP lfl f 1 III JPi fill-.
M'JT Noimt Tiiimi Stiieet,
11. D. CUMM1NGS, rnorntETon.
Wholesale, Grocers, and Dealers in
HALTl'ETltE AND D1UMSTONE.
Ko 219 North Third St.
C. II. 1IOHNE. W.H. KINO. J. 11. SEYUEKT.
J.JOIINE, KING A SEYBEHT,
viioli:sai.i; uiit goods.
No. 121 Market Street
Ordeis filled promptly at lowist prices.
January 3, ISC.
WHOLESALE TOllALCO, SNUF F, AND
No. I III North Third Street,
Hctween Cherry and Itace, west hide.
JjMlANK A STItETOII,
tucccssors 10 i. ji. waller,)
Importers and Dealers in
QUEENSWAHE, CHINA, AND GLASS,
No. 231 N. Third Street,
Hetweeu Itncu and Vino Sts.
aHlsuirir. Oeu'l Partners.
I. II. Waliei:. Special Partner.
T M. KEPHEAIIT,
BAKNES, BKO. A HEItHON,
EATS, CAPrf, STIIAW GOODS & FUItS,
No. C0J Mai krt Street,
JOHN STBOUP A CO.,
Successors to Stroiip A lirother,
WHOLESALE DEALEKH IN Flhll.
No. 21 North Whimes and SS North Third Ht
jlOIlAUDSON L. WKiailT, Jit.
ATTOI1NEY AT LAW,
NO. 123 SOUTH SIXTH STREET.
1LLIAM FISH HH
T II O M A S C A It S O N A t .
DEALEItS IN HOSIERY,
MEN'S FURNISHING GOODS,
LINENS & NOTIONS
so. 18 KtiitTir rnuiiTit siheet
"yAINWIUGHT A CO.,
N, E. Corner htcond and Areli Streets,
TEAS, HYHUPS, COFFEE, SUGAIl, MOLASSES
DICK, Bl'lClS, 111 CAllll fcODA, AC, AC.
4r0rdrrs will rec. ivo piompt utttution.
r-piIK ESPY HOTEL.
ESPY, COLUMBIA COUNTY, PA,
Tho undersigned would inform tho travelling
public th.it h bus taken thonliove numed estab
isbment and thoinimbli' ntllipil ilu, siiTiin lui
the peliect eonM'iilence of his guests. His Under
will bo stocked with the best tbo market airords.
The choicest liquors, wines aud elgaisalways to
Apr.2!,(,!)-lf Espy, l'a.
OltANGEVILLE, COI.UMHIA COUNTY, PA.
BOHlt M'HENBY, Proprietor.
inn tii nimwii JiuiiM', Jiuvjiiy neen pm in
thorough Kpair, is now open Jo tho tiasclllns
Ihiuois and clcaiH,aud tho tabid will be, at all
No pains will be Kpniid to insure tho comfort o
uratigeviiie, dec. iu.'tylf.
iX uurizuT. 1A.
WILLIAM KU'ILKlt, Proprietor,
iiii iiuuie iiuvbik ueen pui jji iiiorouf,'" rejiair
is now optu iir the meptlou of i;ueitK. No
11.1 I til. 11 111 I.-. S..1.1I....I i.. .I,-.. .V-C,
.n't nl llio Imtnlni. T.. l-,,.,., I, !,.- lnl.Altu ..
f-luno oi public pationnne. 'iho bar will be
Mocked ht all tliiies with tine liquoiH and cltjarii,
W. F. PIATT, I'ropriotor,
Ilt-NTON, COLUMlilA COUNTY, l'A.
aio i tiiis a n in ye noin 1110 Jioiei to iiioniutuurg
nun iiiii'i mi iiiiim tiiiis mi i ut'rmay, imirMiiiy
and Saturday of each week. rua li"7U-tf
Stoves and Tinware,
EW STOVE AND TIN SHOI'.
Haiti Street one door abovo E. Mcndenhall's
A largo nssnrtmeut of stoves. Heaters and
llangcs constantly on hand, aud for salo ut tbo
'1 inning in all its urauencs carefully attended to,
'Hid satisfaction guaranteed.
Tin work of all kinds wholesaloand retail. A
lai Is leqlUbted,
g'TOVEd AND TINWARE.
A, M. UUPEItT
announces to his friends aud customers that he
continues Iho nbtno business nt his old place on
MAIN HTKEET, HLOOMHHUllU.
Custoiueis can bo nceomiidated with
of nil kinds, Stovepipes, Tinware and every va
nity of article found lu u Hloe nudTluwaro Es
tablishment lu Iho cltles.uud on the most reason
able teims. Ite iilrlngdoun at tbeshortest notice,
2) DOZEN MILK-PANS
on hand for sale.
JOOTS AND SHOES.
CLAUK Jt. 1I110WN,
CETI1E hi HEFT, AIU0INIC1 THE tlOKE OJ1
KOIUil.SH At Lli.ll,
A lull and completo ffsoitment of nady made
bouts and sboibior itieu. womeu and culltlren
Just liciliid and for sale at mibiuiablo rules.
Varlellib lu biiliall elasses ol lustuiuers, 'Hit,
In si ut uuik douo ut short nothe, us herelofore.
Glo him acall, aprb'7u-if,
E N T 1BTBY,
II. C. HOWElt, DENTIST,
Hespectfully olTers his professional services to
the ladles and guutlemen of llioonisbiirg and vl
clulty. Ho Is prepared to attend to all u.i, vari
ous opelullulis lu the line of ills profession, aud
is provided with lb lalehl Improved Pokcklain
Teeth which will bo Inserted on gold plating
silver and rubber base to look as welt usUie nat
ural teeth. Teeth extracted by all the new auil
most approvid methods, uud all operatlous on
tho teeth curelully aud piopeny attended to,
Itesldeuee uud oltlco u lew doors abnve the
Court House, biime side,
QUICK SAttS AND SMALL I'llOriTS.
II EN It Y YOST,
East Illoonnbuig l'a,, lor ull kinds of the best
Prices nusciiublu uud the but work done,
This will known He. use lmlnK been imt In
tluuouuh m pair is now optn lor tho HTcptloii of
vUitors. N lahiK have l ien bpHted to enstito
th.i tn.tli.t .r.liifurl tt miiklu l lui i,rnnrli.lnf
BLOOMSBUHG, PA., FRIDAY, AUGUST 19,
Tho Gorman Fatherland.
Which Is tho German's falherland?
Is't Prussia's orSwnbla'slandt
Is't where tho llhlne's rich vlntnge streams ?
Or where tho Northern sea-gull screams?
Ah t no, uo, no I
Hli fatherland's not bounded so 1
Which Is tho German's fatherland?
llavnri.i or Styi la's land ?
Is't where thoMarclan ox unbends?
Or whero tho marksman's Iron rends?
Ah 1 no, no, no!
Ills fatherland's not bounded sol
Which Is tho German's fatherland 7
Ponieranla's or Westphalia's laud ? .
Is 11 whero sweep tbo Dunlan waves?
Or where tho thundering Danube raves?
Ah 1 no, no, not
His fatheland's not bounded sol
Which is tho Oermau's fatherland?
Oh, tell mo now tho famous land I
Is't Tyrol, or tho land of Tell?
Such lands nnd people, pleaso mo well,
Ah I no, no, not
Ills fatherland's not boundod sot
Which Is tho German's fatherland?
Conio tell mo now, tho famous land I
Doubtless, It Is tho Auslrlau Htato,
In honors, and In triumphs great 1
Ah 1 no, uo, uo 1
Ills fatherland's not bounded sol
Vhlch Is tho German's rathcrlnnd?
Ho tell mo now tho famous land !
Is't what tho Princes wou by sleljht?
From the Emperors and the Emperors' right?
Ah I no, uo, no I
His fatherland's not bounded sot
Which Is tho German's fatherland?
So tell mo now at last tho laud I
Far ns tho German nccent rings,
And hymns to God In Heaven sings
That Is the land
There, brother, is thy fatherland I
There is the Oerman fatherland,
Whelo oaths attend the grasped hand
Whero truth beams from the sparkling eyes
And lu tho heart lovo warmly lies;
That is tho laud
There, brother, Is thy fatherland !
That Is tho German's fatherland I
Where wrath pursues the forelgu band
Whero every Frank Is held n foe,
And Germans nil ns brothers glow 1
That Is tho laud
All Germany's thelatherlaud!
"Hoy, what is jour name?" "Hobert, sir."
"Yes, but 1 mean your other name," "Hob, sir."
The "Iceland Shakcup;" tho "Alaski Itefrlg
erator" nud llio "Alps Icebolt," are newly in
vented summeis drinks.
HniNGHAM oun doesn't ngreo with his
mother-in-law, and she fieriucntly attacks him
in platoons. Itotton i'jt.
An urchin being lebultcd for wearing out bis
stockings at tho toes, replied that it couldn't bo
lielped "toes wiggled and heels didn't."
Punchinello saysthi' new three cent pistasn
stamp has a portrait of General Washington
Willi General Green in tho background.
SinceuitvIs speaking ns we think, believing
as wo pretend, acting as wo profess, perfonnln;
rs we promise, nud being ns we nppear to be.
A hFiivAKT girl in Toledo, frustrated a burg
lar's plans, by throwing lilm out of a gal ret
window to tho sldewelk. He never recovered
fiom the shock.
A ci.Eiiai.MAN, coming out of the water Willi
a woman ho bnd baptised, asked her how slio
felt in mind. He was not a little surprised to
hear i.er answer, "Ilully."
A Chicago man has been sent up six months
on account of an abortlvo attempt to steal Tap
per's "Pioveiblal l'nilosopby." The sentence
should have been to a lunatic asylum.
A clfuk In uu Erlo hotel has n maguillccnt
scheme in view. It is n elieulur hotel, to rest
on n phot like a loeomotlvo turn-table. The
object is to give every guest a "front room."
Heaiumi n physician remark that n small
blow would bunk a nose, a rustle exclaimed:
WtH, I dtmno about that, l'vo bloived my
noso a number of limes, nnd never broke It
Not having heaid fiom tho debating societies
in lelatlon to tho conundrum; "Why do liens
always lay eggs in the day time?" ucontempor
my answers, "because nt night they are roost
ers," An Inebriated man walking along tho streets
at nlght.rogarded the moon with sovereign con
tempt: "You need'nt be so proud ole feller," ho
said. "You're full only once n month, nnd I am
Why," asked a governess of her little charge,
"do we pray God to give us our dally bread?
Why don't wo nsk for four days, or flvo daj s, or
a week ?" "Wo want it fiesli I" replied tho in
A noulk red man, named John, recently set
tied lu New London, Conn,, stands six feet two
inches In his mi ccasons, and ills Americanized
descendants proudly luiiulie,"how Is that for
High Lo Jack?"
As a lawyer nud a doctor were walklug arm In
a rni n wag said to n friend, "These two are Just
eiiual to one highwayman." "Why?" was tho
resp onse. .'Deenuse It is a lawyer and a doctor
3 our money or your life."
An orator, who had raised his audiciieo lo a
gn at height by his lofty soarings, exclaimed
I will lioweloso in tho beautiful nndexniess.
ivo language of tho poet I forget his nnmo-and
and I foiget what ho said, too 1"
An expel lenccd physician lias discovered, In
tho course of a long and varied practice, lhat
every ouo wishes to go to heaven ; also, that
most people aro willing to taken great dealol
very disagreeablo medicine first,
A I'EKSONAI. sketch of n Western Senator clos
es ns follows: "Ho enn not propel hlmsell
through tho muddy pool of politics nt a higher
rate of speed than lhat of n rudderless pollywog
liirougn n Itelllo of cold mush."
Si'EAKiNO of n recent gale in the vkiulty of
hlto l'lne, Nevada, ono miner remarked
"Why, It's a reg'lar typhoid;" whereupon a
companion pat roniringly remarked to tho by
staudcr?, "ho's au lgnoraut cuss, ho means ty
An anatomical observer nsserted n few days
slnco that there were four hundred and eighty,
nine thousand and eight liuudred and ninety
ouo feathers on tho wings of a butterfly. "
don't behove II," said one of his hearers, "Then
count them yourself," was the reply,
A nonbST liod-carrier lu Now Hampshire re
cenlly carried a o.irrelof Hour fiom Ihesidewalk
to the third story of a new building, uud return
ed with it upon his shoulder to the street, whero
he sold the Hour for eight dollars, and received
n linndsomo sum from the lookers-nu,
AN Irishman of Duumore, Pennsylvania, on
being appealed to fur his signature ou a petition
for "Free Cuba," exclaimed, "Ah 1 1 know wat
you want; you wauttoaunex Canady,and git
Cuba, then when tiicrucomes another draft wo
poor Utvlls will have no placo logo to, I'll uot
"Deah, me," exclaimed Sllgglns, "that new
Burgeon gave Sriuautum's boy n uew Hp from
the child s own cheek I What u painful opera
Hon it must have been!" "I've had a pair of
Hps laden from my cheek more than once," re
plied Mis, Ktlgglns, "aud It wasn't a painful op
ntlon at ull,"
"Jake," said a blooming joungladyin ludi
ana to her lovor, one Huuday evening, 'if you
mean busiuess by romlng here twice a week, 1
waut to know it, for I've Just had au offer from
another feller, aud shall taku him up In two
days if you d on't pop." Jake instantly "popped"
nud the wedding day was set,
LAwvil'.s have a ludicrous habit of Men
tllylug themselves with their clients, by bpealc-
Ing In the plurel number. "Gentlemen of the
Jury," said n Western lawyer, "at the moment
the pollcemau says lie saw us1n the trap, I will
prove that wo were locked up In the station'
bouse, lu a state of lutoxicutlou,"
A l'lTTsiii'iiu magistrate, who unites with his
olllclal fuuettous tho busiuess of au undertaker.
holds court lu his warerooin, and deals out Jus
tice Willi one hand upon a plate bearing tho
name of some person deceased, nud tho other
upon a book of orders for funerals. Tbo
litigants bit upon colllns while their cues are.
I being disposed of,
Till: GAMBLER'S OAT.
Ouo cvoniii(,', a number of us wore
seated in tho bar-room of tho only hotel
lu tho vllhiKO of Frofjtown tho civil
ians' portion of Camp Floyd, In Until,
ilurlii"; tho uiiplensiintncss between tho
Government and tho Mormons, In 1858
warming our shins beforo tho Ihiko
ilro that blazed In tho old-fashioned llro
place. Tho evening had waned, and
was fast nppproachiiij; tho small hours,
when tho footsteps of a horso approach
lui; tho liouso was heard.
Tho night was dreadfully cold and
bleak, th6 wind was howling across tho
nlknll plain, driving tho falling rain
against tho windows, causing them to
rattlo as if ftomo ono was throwing shot
against tho glass, and it was so dark,
why, "Egypt's dark sea" was not a cir
cumstance to it. I havo no idea how
dArk Egypt's dark sea was, but 1 havo
seen tho remark somewhere, and It
sounds liko a good simile, theroforo X
uso it particularly as I havo got stuck
for a better.
Suddenly tho animal halted lu front
of tho house, and a cheery voico called
out, "Halloa l
Tho landlord went to to tho door and
partially opening it, peered out into tho
darkness, but not being ablo to discover
anything, said :
"Yes, I am; but if you will bustlo
about right cheerily I won't stay hero
"Go your way, if you want to, I am
suro I don't desiro to interfero with
"I ain't going away, not if thero's a
roof over your house. I como to stay,
and am going to or havo a fight."
"1 calculate stranger, you can got ac
commodated with a lively shako up, if
you aro spilin' for a fight.
"Not edzactly spilin' but somebody
will havo to superintend a funeral if I
am kept out hero much longer.
"Don't know about that; but ono
thing is sartin, jou can help yourself
come in, or stay out, jess as you feel
like. Wo ain't particular," and tho
landlord closed tho door and returned
to his seat beforo tho fire, and pulling
his Powhatan pino from his pocket.
proceeded to fill it with tobacco prepar
atory to enjoying a smoke.
A minute had scarcely elapsed beforo
the door opened, and a large, powerful
man entered. His hair hung in ringlets
down his back and clustered over his
shoulders. His face was almost hidden
behind it bushy black pair of whiskers,
and beneath a broad-brimmed hat. Ho
appioached tho fire,whilotho rain drip
ped from his buckskin garments, leav
ing1 a little rivulet upon the floor.
" 'Joying yourself here, ain't you ?'
he said, ns ho looked around and tooku
mental inventory of those present.
"Trying to bo comfortable," replied
the landlord. "Woalwnys does."
"Denied Independent, too don't
kecr 'bout Vommodntiiig anybody
'Not pertickler. Got tho dead wood
on overybody. There hain't no other
lioiHo in this iiero town, and they all
has to como to mo anyhow."
"You is the landlord, I reckon. Can't
you give a fellow something to eat?
I'm as hungry as a coyote."
'Cood's gone out, and I don't think
thar Is any tiling in tho kitchen, 'copt-
ng somo cold wittles. You can go in
thoro and seo what you can find."
Tho stranger took a candlo, lit it, and
proceeded to tho kitchen, the way being
pointed out to him by tho landlord.
After ho had gone out, tho landlord
roused an Indian boy, who was sleeping
in ono corner of the room, and .sent him
out lo tako care of tho stranger's horse,
which had been left standing in front
of tho door. Somo fifteen minutes
passed away, when tho stranger re
turned from tho kitchen, followed by a
largo black cat.
'Whoso cat is that, and whero did it
come from?" asked tho landlord.
"That ar animlle b'long-s to mo, and
was brought from Now Mexico. It is a
smart eat, it Is."
"And tho ownera lucky fulIow,"broko
in a laciturn old gambler who had been
smoking his pipe all the evening, with
out uttering a word.
"You is right, old fellow; a black eat
always brings good luck, and that cat
has been my constant companion for
tlireo years. Ho's better nor a dog, nnd
just as much company. Why, ho knows
more nor a man. Don't you, Sam ?"
Tho eat Jumped upon it's master's
shoulder, aud began .to purr and arch
its back, as if It greatly pleased at tho
praUo bestowed upon it.
"I say landlord, havo you got any
chickens? I'd like to havo ono for
"So would I," replied tho landlord,
"but I can't get it. Thero ain't any ono
In this region as lias got chlckons, 'ccpt
ing tho Cumol of tho cavalry, opposite,
and ho keeps n guard standing over tho
stablo In which they roost,"
Tho stranger again took a survey of
tho party, aud then said :
"You look liko a good set of fellows.
Now I'll tell you what wo'll do. If you
aro agreed, wo will havo chicken for
our breakfast, and tho Curnel will suf
fer. What say you all?"
"It would bo a littlo loo dangerous to
attempt to nip them chickens," said tho
gambler, "although 1 must say I think
a piece of chicken would tivsto mighty
"Whar did you say tho chickens roos
ted?" askod tho btranger.
Tho landlord told him, and tu ho did
so the stranger stroked tho back of his
eat, anil repeated tho landlord'H words.
Having concluded, ho said, "Now Sam
you must get us ono of them chlckeiu,
ami you havo got to bo kcerful, or you
will loso ono of your lives." Ho then
opened tho tloor, and tho cat walked
Tho stranger narrated several won
derful feats that had been performed by
his cat, uud thereby managed to whilo
away somo Alteon or twenty minutes,
when a scratching at tho door was
heard, Ho got up and opened It, aud
In marched Sam, holding a chicken by
Every ono In that room was dumb
founded, for they had no Idea that tho
cat would accomplish thcblddlngof his
'Sam, ono is not enough; wo must
havo another. Bo a good fellow and
got it for us," said tho stranger, ns ho
again opened tho door for the cat to go
Tho company had not been done ex
pressing their astonishment at tho
wonderful knowlcdgo of tho feline, cro
ho returned onco moro with anotlierilno
"You aro o noble fellow, nud deserve
something, nnil blamo If you shan't
havo tho heads of both them birds. In
thu meantime, you had better lay down
in front of the ilro and dry yourself, or
you will havo tt bad cold In tho morn
Tho cat walked to the hearth corner
and quietly culled himself up and was
soon fast nslecp. Tho stealing of thu
Colonel s chickens evidently pleased the
landlord greatly, for he immediately
brought out hisjug and brewed a largo
pitcher of punch and invited us all to
partake of It. Wo drank punch, told
stories and sung songs for two or three
hours, nnd then went to bed, nnd when
wo separated, tho stranger took his eat
with him. Tho chickens weio given to
the cook, who served them up tho next
morning for breakfast, being careful to
burn tho feathers and such portions as
could not bo cooked, to prevent detec
tion, should a guard bd S3nt around for
tho purpose of hunting for tho thieves.
At tho time I write of, tho soldiers had
but recently been paid off, and every
liouso in tho town was a gambling houso
and liquor saloon, nnd three-fourths of
those In or about tho town wero gam
biers by profession. Entering ono of
these saloons the afternoon following
the eve as abovo narrated, I found tho
stranger seated behind a table, upon
which was piled several hundred dol
lars in gold and silver coin, a number
of packs of cards, and by thorn was ly
ing tho eat. I invited tho stranger to
take a drink, and ho got up and accom
panied mo to tho bar, but as ho did so,
ho said :
"Sam, keep a sharp lookout, or somo
of tho cash will be nipped."
Wo stood at tho bar somo minutes,
waiting our turn to be served, when wo
wero suddenly startled by a yell of u,
ony. Turning oround, wo observed a
soldier dancing around tho room with
the eat clinging to his band. Tho stran
ger jumped forward, and catching tho
soldier by tho throat, said :
'You have been trying to steal same
thing from my table."
"No, I haven't," was tho dogged re
ply. "You can't deceive me. What Is that
you havo in your hand. A twenty dol
lar pieco, as sure ns I live. Give it up,"
and ho took a double eagle from the sol
dier's hand, and giving him a kick, sent
him headlong into thestroet.
"It won't do to try to steal anything
from mo whilo Sam is on guard. Wo
do all tho stealing that is done, don't
we Sam,"said tho stranger, nshoturned
to the bar to obtain the think which
had been compounded for him, whilo
tho cat jumped on the table and resumed
his position lis guard over his master's
Having taken his drink, tliOhtrangcr
resumed Ills seat behind his table, and
very quickly began to deal moiito to a
crowd who collected around him.
Several days passed away beforo I saw
thu stranger again, although I heard of
him and his cat a dozen times a day. In
fact, Sam and his tricks had become thu
topic of conversation in camp. Ho was
as faithful as a dog, and followed his
master wherever lie went. Tho dogs at
first manifested a disposition to pitch
into him, but, unliko other cats, he
would not run, and ho hail a trick of
leaping upon their backs and seizing
hold of them with Ills teeth, and reach
ing for their eyes wjtli his sharp claws.
Ho would whip tho largest dog in tho
camp in less time tlian it takes to say
Jack Robinson, and after ho had de
feated several ol tho largest and fiercest
ho was let alone and given a wido berth
by tho remainder of tho canines.
This cat was a strange fellow. Ho
would pay no attention to any ono but
Ids master, whum ho would follow like
a spaniel. Ho would suffer anybody to
to stroko his back, but It wos utterly Im
possible to get him to recognlzo any act
whatovcr. Ho was always at tho gamb
ling table, apparently acting as a "look
out," for if any one attempted to pick
up what was known among gamblers as
a "sleeper," ho would pouueo upon and
givo them a taste of tho quality of his
teeth, but if they attended to their own
moiioy, Sam was perfectly quiet.
Somo three months after tho first np
pearanco of tho gambler at tho camp,
with his cat, an awful tragedy took
place. Tho gambler had been having a
reniarkablo run of good luck, and had
won somowliero between twenty-fivo
and thirty thousand dollars, This lie
had changed from coin into demands
on the United States Treasury, for con
venience, and declared that ho was go
ing to leave tho country. Times were
getting dull. Tho soldiers had spentall
tho money they had, and It had gradu
ally found Us way into tho hands of a
few persons, nnd they were not going to
run tho risk of losing it nttho gambling
tabic; tnereiore, tho gamblers wero
having rough times, and ono by one,
thoy wero leaving and seeking other re
gions. Tho owner of tho catnnnounced
his Intention of going to Plko's Peak,
whero thero was n prospect of lively
times, as tho immigrants to t ho mines
wero beginning to arrive.
Ho hail kept perfectly sober during
his stay at tho camp, but now that ho
was reatly to taku ids departure, ho got
to drinking, and kept on a spree for
several days. During this thno ho bo
came excessively quarrolsomo, and on
soveral occasions had drawn his pistol
and fired at persons, but had not hit
any ono. Quito a feeling of Indignation
against him had been aroused, and dark
throats of lynching wero heard from
Thoro lived at tho camp a wagon
master named Hurry Price, who wu a
COL. DEM. - VOL. XXXIV NO. 20.
quiet, penccnblo man, beloved by all
who wns never known to engago In n
quarrel. Ho wont lo tho stranger, told
him of thofecllng that had been aroused
nnd ndviscd him to bo moro circumspect
In his conduct. Instead of taking the
ndvlco In tho spirit It was given, the
gombler, without a word, drew ills pis
tol nntl shot Prico through tho heart,
causing instant death.
And now comes tho strangest part of
this etrango story. Tho moment ho
fired his pistol and poor Prico fell, tho
cat Jumped upon Its master's shoulders,
and seized him by.tlie throat with lit
teetli. In vain ho struggled to throw It
off; It clung to him with llio tenacity of
a bull-dog, and did not release its hold
until Its master had raised ills pistol and
blown its head to pieces.
Tho greatest excitement followed the
murderer. Tho murderer tried to es
cape, but tho crowd, summoned by tho
reportof the pistol, collected too quickly
and ho was captured. In less time than
jt takes to narrate it, the excited crowd
had procured a ropo, placed it around
the neck of the miserable man, and
swung him to tho end of a wagon
tongue, which was elevated for that
A Gentleman ordered a suit of clothes
from n tailor, nnd specially enjoined
him that they must be made by the
next Tuesday, and must be made In the
finest style, and that unless tho tailor
could havo them ready to a certainty
beyond peradventtiro to tho day, that
ho must not undertake them; but Snip
promised faithfully that they would bo
finished. Tuesday eatno and no clothes;
the enraged man Hew to the eabbago
man's liouso and said :
"What's the reason my clothes are not
ready as you promised ? Here you've
kept mo in tho city nta losof timoand
busiuess only to disappoint me; now, if
we had you in our part of the couutry,
I tell you what they would call you:
they would call you it perfect squirt !"
Tho humble knight of tho goose ex
plained that tho only competent work
man that he had,capab!eof making tho
suit, had n wife lying ut dentil's door,
and ho could not possibly leavo her,
Tho outraged gentleman was nut able to
smother his disappointment, and bera
ted the tailor pretty soundly for falling
in his positive promise. Tho ninth
fraction of the "genus homo" could not
.stand this, and ; l.iinly told his custom
er to go to tlie c. .uric regions of Pande
monium. The customer, red witli rage, rushed
across the sheet lo a lawyer, and In au
excited and hurried manner, said :
'Do you know, Snip, tho tailor acro-s
tbo way ?"
"Yes, I know him," answered Brief.
"Well, now, I want your advice,"
said tho gentleman ; "I want to know
what you would doln such a case. That
old stitch iotiso has kept mo hero in tiio
city ou oxiien.se, to tho great detriment
of my business nnd disappointed mo in
a suit of clothes; but when I went to re
monstrate with the fellowabout it.what
do you suppose ho said lo me? He told
mo to go to the dovil I"
Witli theso words he laid down a ten
dollar bill on tbo desk, ami said, "Now,
sir, what would you do?"
"Do you mean tlih for n retainer?"
"I do," was tho reply.
"Then," said Brlef.quietly folding up
the i mi and putting it intr. bis posket,
"be :oId you to go to tho devil. Well.
my opinion and advice to you is, don't
do it. There is moi cover, no statute or
loc id law that can compel you to a spe
cific performance. I .say, don't do it
until called by Almighty power."
.1 Toiif-lilng- incident.
The world is full of mournful inci
dents. How little do wo know of tho
poignant sorrow myriads of our fellow
creatures are compelled to suffer. The
following touching event wo tako from
a Boston journal:
An expressman upon reaching his
office early ono cold morning in January,
observed on tho sidewalk, a long heavy
box, which his practiced eye at once
identified as containing a corpse. Upon
ono end of tiio box, shivering with tho
cold, sat n halfclad boy about seven or
eight years old. Addressing him kind
ly, ho said :
"My lad, don't sit there, you will
freeze ; como in and sit by the stove.''
Bursting into tear-, tho littlo Tellow
replied, "No, I can't como In ; my
mother is in thi boy, and I prom-ed
her 1 would never leave her until we
Deeply affected with the touching de
votion of tills bravo littlo fellow, ho
finally succeeded in convincing him of
tho entiro safety of his precious charge,
and taking him over lo n neighboring
restaurant, gave him n warmbreokfast,
aud learned tho particulars of his story.
His father died about u year previously,
in n remote village in Minnesota, leav
ing Ills mother in poor health and near
ly destitute. Sho died but a few days
beforo the boy's sad journey, charging
tho littlo hero with the duty of convey
ing her remains to her friends in a dis
tant State, and furnishing him with (alt
sho had) u sum of inonoy barely sufll
den t to carry them both by freight cars
to their destination. Tho littlo fellow
had actually ridden night and day in
a freight car with Ids melancholy trust,
never for a moment losing bight of It.
A Man In Ohio recently killed 15,7s 1
snakes In twenty acres of woods on his
farm, anil ho says thero aro tlireo i lines
as many left. A correspondent says ho
Is trying to rout out tho woods for picnic
parties and Sunday school celebrations,
but tiio peoplo of tlie neighborhood havo
hardly any enthusiasm for tho place.
They say they don't object to a snako
or two iiero and there, but when there
aro forty thousand in ono sylvan glade,
thero Is likely to bu too much sociabil
ity. The happy possessor of u big dog,out
West, being denied passagofor him on
tho cars, chained him to tho rear brake
of tho train. After on hour's Journov
ho went back to look at him, and found
tho chain and collar all right, but the
dog was protty much towed away.
KATES OF AUVliKTlSlSfJ.
Ouo square, (Ion lines orlts ctiulvalcnl.lu Non.
patell typo) one or two Insertion, fl.50) thtas
bpace. 1m, tit, 3t. OM. It
Oucurjuare I2JX) 3,00 ((,00 110,00 10,00
Twobrjnarcs SiO 6,00 7,00 0,"0 1S,M
Tlireo nqunrcs 6,00 J,(io 0,00 12,00 11,00
Four miunrci 7 00 0,00 11,00 17,00 2&.00
Quarter column.. 10,00 12,00 11,00 20,30 30,00
llnlfcoliinill 15,00 18,00 MOO C0.00 00,00
Ouo column .80,00 06,00 40,00 00,00 100.00
Executor's or Administrator's Notice, 13.00,
Auditor's or.Assienco's Notice, (2.60.
Local notices, twenty cents n line; by llio year
Cards lnllio"l!udncssDlrcetory" column, H.00
per year for llio first two lines, nnd 1 1,00 for each
Itoscoe (.'(milting ns an Amateur
Conkllng practices pugilism, it seems.
Ho has had masters famous In their lino
ond can fence, and fib, and cut, and dub
with tho best or them. Every morning
ho arises from his chasto couch, and
whilo yet in his night clothes, that
leaves his senatorial legs exposed, and
Ills senatorial muscles of tho arm free,
for an hour ho dances around a sack of
bran suspended from tho ceiling, hit
ting It right nnd left with great force,
rapidity, nnd precision. After this a
couple of stout fellows rub tho Senator
down witli crash towels and horso brush
es. This tremendous athlete of tho
fogbank thou descends to raw steak nud
porter. This fearful gladiator of tho
fcenato is very fond of inviting any
friend who may call upon him to a lit
tlo trial with the gloves, and then amus
ing himself by administering dubi on
thu nose and in tho eyes, or of upsetting
his friends entirely. My friend .Tones,
a warm admirer of the curley pitted law
maker, bad this Invitation to stand up
and bo punished until ho found it somo
what fatiguing. So ono day lie intro
duced ids friend Prico. When invited
to put on tho gloves, ns usual, he declin
ed, but recommended his friend Price.
Price was also reluctant, but consented,
l'hu Senator very kindly gavo Prico
somo instruction us to tho position and
modo of striking out.
"Now hit me," cried tho Ronator,
dancing around Price. "I fear 1 shall
hurt you," said Price. "Never miud
me," continued tho Senator, giving
Prico a stinger on tho nose. "Well,
look out," snorted Price, very red in
The Senator tried to get ono in oi
Price's peepers, when his arm was sud
denly thrown up In an extraordinary
manner. Prico had caught It tho most
awkward way and gavo itsuch a wrench
that Conkey thought for a moment his
arm wns gone. Whilo looking for it ho
got n most infernal whack between his
eyes. Tho Senatorial beauty threw up
ids arms and stumbling back, folbover
a lounge, leaving nothing vislblo but
his senatorial legs, nnd thero ho lay
studying a new sort of astronomy that
boomed to bo mado up of lire-works,
whilo Jones cried "time," Conkling did
not come to time, but when lie did
gather himself up, looking extremely
silly, Prico said : "1 beg your pardon,
Mr. Senator, I thought you moro expe
rienced than you seem to bo. I am an
old band ut tills sort of thing, having
been brought up in tho priza ring."
Don Piatl lo Cincinnati Commercial.
Ilecclici-'s Shot at a Squirrel.
Henry Ward Bcccher, In a star paper
on "Chipmunks" In the Christian
Union, tells this story of himself:
The first that I overtired ngun, it was
nt a "chippy," and I did not lilt him.
My father it was who let me trot behind
him, n seven or eight year old, whilo he
hunted the fields. How my nerves
screwed up when ho took nim, and
what a crash in my over-sensitivo ear
was tho report ! It was always painful,
and always an irresistible fascination.
And so one day returning home, out
ran n bold ehipmonk, and coursed along
:lio wall with trailing tall, then mount
i I.' n stone, tail cocked up, ho said,
ilit me, hit me, hit mo, he, he, ho!"
' 1 lore, Henry, do you want to shoot ?"
"Yes, sir no yes, I do." "Get behind
me lit the gun lest on Iny shoulder
now take aim come, pull the trigger
or he'll be off."
I shut up ono eyo in a manner that
carried tlie other witli it. Iopenedboth.
The tears came. Tho squirrel seemed
six or seven squirrels whirling round
in theuir. 1 took aim, but it would not
stay aimed. Somehow I saw tho sky,
thostono wall, a great mullen stalk,
the squirrel, mid twenty other things,
all in a jig. Bang went tho gun. "Chig-ger-ree-reo"
went tho squirrel us ho
dived down, laughing, into a hole.
Well, I've seen many a minister do
tho samo thing with n sermon, and feel
as sati-llcd as 1 did. To bo suro I bad
not hit any tiling, but I had mado a
."tot to !c Outdone.
Ono of tho zealous Chaplains of tho
army of Iho Potomac called on a Colonel
noted for ids profanity, In order to talk
about tho religious interests of his men.
Ho was politely received, and motioned
to a seat on a chest, when tho following
dialogue iiisticd :
Chap. Colonel, you havo ono of the
finest regiments in tho army.
Col. I beliovo so.
Chap. Do you think you pay euffl
cient attention to tho religious instruc
tion of your men?
Col, (doubtfully) Well I don't
Chap. A lively Interest has been
awakened in the Mas., (a revival
regiment.) Tho Lord has blessed the
labors of his servants, and ten havo al
ready been baptized.
Cui. (excitedly) Is that so I (To
tho attendant:) Sergeant Major, havo
fifteen men detailed immediately for
baptism. I'll bo d d if I'll be out-
done by any Massachusetts regiment.
Some years ago,thero lived lu an Ea
tern town, au old man who had a pro
pensity for "hooking" small at.d porta
ble articles that eamo in his way. As
lie wns poor and past labor, and well
known about tho town, no further no
tlco wns taken of his peculations than to
keep u sharp look-out when ho was
around. A dealer had a quantity of dry
fish landed on tho wharf at an hour too
Into to get them into his btoro, nnd, us
ho was about covering them with an old
sail-doth, iio espied old B., apparently
recoimolterlng. Selecting u couple of
thu fish, ho said : "Hero 11., 1 must
leavo theso fish out hero to night, and I
will give you these two If you promise
mo that you will not steal ony." "That
Is n fair offer, Mr. A., but-wcll-1 don't
know," with nglanco ut thundered fish,
and then ut tho pile, "JtitnkJ can ilo
Tm:m: nro ninety-six Welsh Congre
gational eliuitlus lu this country.