Newspaper Page Text
VOL. I. NO. 2T. "" ET,OOMSTiTTTja PA PPTnAV TTTT.V ISA? "
HOTELS AND SALOONS,
T O N Q 1' O X 1) 11 o T E L.
i itv. imilerslirlioil has hit? Icnsn.l n,l t-n.r......t.,i.
ft In Rood style, tlio ubovo wolI-l(iiiivni House,
A MONO THi: MOUNTAINS
m llnl)Orilol H Ikf Cllltlllllll.LntKl Hltllll'n,, ..
in one of the ino-tt beautiful and healthful rcirlons
in the Mate! l fully prepared lu accommodate
OMIUIS Mint n,yM,i iivi 1
with Tiir.m i'amimix
Thel'ond nnd streams urn well studied with
delicious Hall of ninny kinds Incliidlnii
t u o v t a i t i k r.,
mid limits 111 cood tinier will Iju kept for Ihonc
nunmodatloii and amusement of uucsts, either
f..r tIliliiB or pleasure excursions upon thli boun
tiful sheet of water wlilcli It
HIIVHUAIi Mlt.lN IN l:XTi:.T.
(inri'rill llfloil lll-lltl vl f.ncl t '.k.... I .1. t.. .........
ileil to tlio huntsman iv sptciidld llcfd lor his own
IK'(UJi.ir sports, unit cxetcisu Willi Ills
I) O (I A N I) 0 17 N.
Ills Larder will ho ntvvnvs nrovl.te.i u-iti. n,
I'leltc iiclcs of the season; nnd his liar stocked with
l'l hi. l.iauoitx. Thu llousu Is huso and loinmo
uioust the Stahl liu extensive iiihI sni...
The llollic In reiu-heil Irom several points cm
t.iu t , , , . lv ...ttixuMuiiini luiuroiiiii imo is
jsnlijidldiilacuiopasstlio hot months or Hum-
';'' li. it. HAYiiuitvr.
Muy l'( lSOT-ttii.
HhrtOMHIU'lUl. mt.tTMIIIA IYIITVTV l.v
liiiown nnd eelltnilly-loeuteil house, tho llxchutiKO
Hotel, situate on .MAIN SJTItlUlT, In niooiiisbuii:,
Iminidlnteiy opposite the Columbia County Court
i....,-,,., ivni-vn.u.ij ilt,lIIS US iriCUllS I11UI lilt'
UUbllC III Uellerill tllllt Ills ImliLn Id tlm.. It. ,.r.l..r
fur tho reception iiu.l entertainment of traveller
irlioinay hotllsiHisecl to favor It with their cus
tom. Ho has spared no expense In preparliiK tlio
Uxclinnga for tho entertainment or his truest,
neither hhall there ho anything mulling (on his
port) to minister to their iiorsonnl eomrort. Ills
Imuso is spacious, and enjoys an exeellent bus.
oninlbusscs run tit all times heiu-een iho l'v.
th.mgu Hotel ami thovarlo' s railroad depots, hv
tthlch travellers will Ira pleasantly convoyed to
nun ironi mo icspccuvc Minions muuo lime to
meet mo cum. .iun. r. umajw,
UloomsburK, Mareh 53, ltiili.
1 0 Ii U M b r A
nr. UN a it ii sToiiNint.
IlAVINti lately pinohnsod and lilted up tho
well-known lloolsou Hotel rroiierty, lis-atcd a
li-.vv noons ahovk run cornr iinrsi:,
en the Milne hide or tho street, In the town of
hltximshuri:: and Having obtained it license for
tlio same as n
11 K S T A U H A X T ,
(lie Proprietor has deterinlnetl to Rive to the pen
ilc visiting the town on business or pleasure,
a utti.i: MOlll: ItOO.M.
HI stiil.lliir also I extensive, nml Is fitted til
to put litiKKlcsaliil can layes In the dry. Ho prom
Iscslhat everything about his establishment shall
heeoiiducted 111 ail orderly and lawful manner;
dad ho respectfully solicits n share of the puhlle
liattoiliinc. 1""" '-..
21, 21, i", Jfc 27, IlllOAIIWAY, N. Y.
Opiwite Jluuliny Green,
OS TIIK Kl'lIOI'CAN I'LAN.
THi; Stfvi:ns llorsr. Is well and w ldely known
to tho traveling puhlle. The location Is especial
ly suitable to metchalits and huslness men ; It is
In close proximity tothe huslness pan unite city
-Is on the llluliway orsoullielli and Westell!
travel anil r.iljacent in an uie puueipai mumm
nml sli'imil.f.itt ileit.its.
'I ho htevens House has llheral aeeommodatlon
fur over iiminilests it Is wen iiirnisneu, anil pt
ieKses every moilerate linplovctileiil for the com
f..it nn.l i.nti.rtfiliii.ielil. of Us inmates. 1 hi
rooms are. spacious and well vent Hated plovlded
Willi Kits and water-the attendance Is prompt
anil lespecthll and tho talile Is (encroiisiy pro
vl.letl Willi every tlelleacy or the teasini-al mod'
iralo rates. UKO. K. CIIAMl A t o.
cn:oi!oi: w. mauoi:ii, rioprietor.
Tlio idiovo well-known hotel has recently under
ciiii,.,!Hlleiilchiimiesiii Its internal al ranKcnieuts,
nml lis proprieloraniuninces to his former custom
Hid tho travclllli!! pillule tllal ins accomouauoiis
lur tlineoniliii't of his tsuests are second to none in
o lllu f.,1.1 Ill ..Kl-.h-m he round Sllli-
pllcd, not only withsulistantl.il food, lint with all
(he delicacies or tho season. His wlnci nlvi li.
Miiors fexcent that popular heverase hnowtl as
'.lA'A-an"l,iiillchaseil direct Ironi the Impoitln
h.,.iunD .. ...itlrnte mint nml tli'.. rroltl all IHii
'.I II.. lu IIi.iii .-fnl f.)iii lllirlnl Dillion
'C lu the past, and will continue todeerve II In
hMutule. cniitm: w. mai'ohii.
'pilK sVAX HOTKli,
' thi: ri'i'i n iiot'sr.l
on Ni,r.vii.i.i:, cui.imiii.v en., i-a.
Ths stihsei Iher lespecllully inioims nisiiieiii s
and the pui.uc, thai he has taken the nhove well
known House or Knttrtaiinnent, and will oe
lihased to icielve the custom
f all who will
tavor hli'.i with a cull.
in: wir.i. ki:i:p a oo taiii.h,
allar well slocked with the best of Liquors, and
rv cry elloit will bo made to lender '.l;.1,,,'!1'ls"
faction. , ,. .IiHl.Vr-.W Dl.lt.
orangevllle, I'a Mnrili 1, 1'07-lm.
'Aik Proprietor of ther.xchangoSaloonlias noti
on hand n large slock of
M-irKIl OYSIl'.US, S.VllillNl-S, TIHIT, I'.OI.OdSAH
in:i:i'K)xf;ui:, nuu.Ki) lions swhit.h tilf.r.si
LAOKR HKKIt, ALK, AC.
en- co.mk o.vi:, cojii: ai.i. ash sin:, tiv
llloomsburg. May It, 1H17.
ISsl'V, C'OLUJIHIA COUNTY, l'A.
Tim subMilbcr lesi.tclfully infoimshls frit nils
.... .. .,1.. t.,. Im. ttiken tbe above well
known ilotiso of mtertulniiiint, 'J!" VJJ'U.m
pleased to iccclvo tho tusioin of all who will
favor him with a call.
111: wilt. Ki:m a ciood taih.i:,
a liar well stocked with the best of I.l'lu". "'J
tvery elloit Will bo made to lender 111 lie satis
faction, M- Hl-Ml.l.i.
Kspy, Pa., April 12, H-W.
OHANGKVILI.i:, COLUJIIHA COUNTY, PA.
isiiAin. MWiMA, rnoritiirroit.
Having taken possession or tins wen-Know n
l.oi'2e, sol.mgkejit by Mintiel liver. I.I ; J "':
Hi IIAK ANllLAltlinllwHlltliecholccstHquoli
and new est delicacies. Ills stab e Is not e x. Hi M
inthocounly; ami no pnlus will bo V " !.
accominodate gticbis, tnpi.iu..
O Catavvissa, Pa.
Tho nhovt) Hotel has lately been purchased by
IIMNUY J. CUMtK, and has been thoroughly re
modelled, repaired, and icfurnishwl. It wilt I
Innn.l nmr. Ill Its UrrailCOmCIlt llllll IHllWlntlllelllS,
11 ilrst-class Hotel, ami second to none In Iho
lountry. Persons In cities wishing to biciiil thu
hot months Hi the country, will do well to give
Iho proprietor n call.
rjMIE UNION HOTEL, ,
Arch Htreet. between Third and I'ouilli Htreels,
Corner of Ninth ud Chestnut hliccls,
II. W. KANAKA,
to noiith ForiiTit Hriir.m,
J. & W. G. M'KIHIIIN, Pioprletor,
Mny 10, 1807-ly,
A Id, KINDS OK JOlflMUNTINa
r'V. neatly executed at TliK Coi.Uim. bteum
A Democratic; Nuwspapor,
ts I'fiii.isiii.ii r.M.nv rmtiAV Monsixri at
iii.oiiMsiii itc, im:nxa.
THi: principles of tills piper iiioofMioJellcrson.
Inn Schooltif politics. Those principles will novo
lecoiiipiiimwcd.yetcouitcsy ami klndess shall
not he lorj,'iitteiiliitllscHsslutheni,whetlierwltli
Individuals, or wilh contemporaries or the. l'res
Tho unity, liai.pliuw.nnd prosperity or the coun
try Is our aim and ol.Jeet; and as the means to
secure that, we shall l.ihor honestly andearnesllv
r.ir Hie haimoiiy.siiceessand grow llinf our orgiin-
Ti.nsisofAiivKiiTisixii :-Oneniiare(teii lines
or less) one or three insertions SliOj each subse
quent Invert Ion .VI cents.
M-Arn. 1st, 2m. .hi. Cm. iv.
Olio square t2.l 8.1,l SI.OO SO.OD SIO.CIl
Two squares a,K) 3,nl ll.iK) n,wi li,i)
Three squares fl.Oi) 7,00 R,(iO 12,00
! our Kiuarcs (1,r) 8,1111 io.ijO 11,00 20.no
Half column 10,00 12,() l.y) 211,01) So.im
One colunii IV00 ls.oo 20,110 so.m co.im
llxecutor's nml Admliilstrator'H Notice 5.1,00; All-
litor's Notice SJ,"A Oilier iidvertlsemcnts Inser
ted according to special contract.
Huslnoss notices, without advertisement, twenty
cents per line.
Transient advertisements payable in advance-
all others duo alter the first Insertion,
It Is, In all cite, more likely to be satisfac
tory, both to suhscilbers and to tho Publishers,
that remittances and all communications respect
Ins the business of the paper, bo sent direct tothe
oillceof publication. All letters, whether lelatlui!
to the editorial or business concerns of Iho paper,
and nil payments for subscriptions, advertising,
or Jobbing, are to bo m.uloto and addressed
Printed at Hoblson's Ilulidlugs, near the Court
House, by Chas. M. VANiinnsi.tcf,
I'ltANIC It. KNYM'.lt.
A T T O It N II Y-A T I. A V,
Ashland, Schuylkill County, Penn'ii.
"ir K. JACKSON,
Ilerwick, Columbia County, PcnnV
" A T T O It N 1 1 Y - A T-1, A W,
Ilerwick, Columbia County, Penn'
Tyir,LIA3l II. AlMiOTT,
ATTOItNlll -AT-I.A V.
CATAYVISSA, l'A. ,
JOIIX (i. I'UKKZH,
A T T 1 1 1 ! N 1 1 Y - A T - I. A V,
Olllce lu P.egWer and lUconlci's olllee, 111 the
basemout of the Court House, llloomsbuig, Pa,
OliHUT 1'. fl.AUK,
corner or Main and M.tlkct sticcts, over
I'irst National Hunk, Hlooinsbuig, P.i.
-QU. L. Ii. KlilXK,
. gia.lliaie 01 .11 11crs1.11 .mi.iu.u t ...n
n.liiphla, liavlllg pertlllllli 111 lv located, olh'ls his
piolesslouai serv ices in uie ciui'iih ,,i , -i..,, i.i
and viiinltv. tllliie 011 Main sti. et, s. el door
east of Cieasy .V. .lulm's liulliling. 11 nt-.vtrr-ttui
11. IilTTI. K,
A T T 0 II N K Y - A T I. A W,
Olllco on Malnstrcit.ln hi Irk building below the.
Court House, Illooluslairg, Pa.
L .1 W,
-OiFK'K-Court Huuse Alley, below; the ft
lumMm Olllce. JaiiH...
j 1$. uomsox,
A TTOKN li Y-AT-I.A W ,
Olllce lii rnangst's Ihilldlng.Mnln street. Went
of the American House. l"'j-"
A U C T 1 O X H K It.
that he is still 111 the 'ncld. leady and willing to
attend lo all the duilcs of Ills call ng. 1 eis ns
iles ring nis serv itss siiuiu.i v,,. ... -
at llloomsburg, P.i. I'"'""
Dlt. W. II. liHADIil'. 1 1
. . . 1. .....t ir...ll,..,1 Tilt-, ffi.r iT. M. AllllV.l
PHYSICIAN AND S UKO HON,
j- nniee at the house opposite Shlve's HIiHii
Calls promptly nttended to both night and day.
Illoomshti-g, Jan. i. im...
C. S II I V E ,
C A 11 I N li T M A K K 11 ,
anii M.vfi'.vcri'm:i: nv sii..vm or
SASH, 1UJXD.S, DOOItS,
h 11 r t t 1: n s, m o r l i i n i i4.
AV1XDOW KHAMICS, &C.
June W, lsiIT.
SHAV1NC!, 1IAIU CUTTING
Court House Alley, next door to (Uumblan Olllce
HI.OOJ SilllUlli, l .l.
it.i?(i,.i,.., nn.l WbUkers coloied black or
brown, llair i'onletn destroy ;''''''! ""' iV,1"
f; iff, g t ?yw
A (i E ,
WATLilMAKKU ANH JKWI'.I.UY,
.Vuhi Nml, mm' II"1 Coin'' HiMie,
t'o.ivlanllyoiihatiua.moass... ... "
AM.MtiCAN an . HWiHb
Particular .1...... .
ia- Mii'sonlo . milks inntlo 1" older, AM work
I'M LONKt.V S1XCK MVMOTHI3K DIUU.
I'M lonely since my mother died,
Though friends and kindreds nather near,
I cannot cheek tho rising sighs, -Or
stay tho silent heartfelt tears
Of earthly friends sho was the best,
My erring jotuliful steps to guide,
(Hi I do not emtio because I weep,
I'm lonely since my mother died,
Ciioitt-s I'm lonely slneo my mother died,
Though frlciulsntid kindred gather near,
I cannot check the rising sigh,
Or May tho silent henrlfelt tear.
You may not deem It brave or strong,
To let those tears so often How,
lint those who've lost a mother's love,
Can tell tho pain or my sad win',
Could I but call her back again,
And kneel once more down by her side,
I d love her better than bclore,
I'm lonely since my mother died,
I "Honrs fin lonelv since mv niotht r illcl.
Oh, you who have a mother dear,
I,et not n word or art give pain,
Hut cherish, lovn her with your lire,
You ne'er can have her back ag 1I11,
Then when she's called from yon away,
Across death's dark and troubled tide,
in pain with me you need not say,
I'm lonely since my mother died.
Ciiouf.s I'm Innily since my mother died.
i:n huh kumt ills vom Stetel raus
Und geth tins hackestch Kchttlhaus;
Hr Is en gllcd von tier string biend,
i:r wert nh tier gncnited geuent.
Ilr segt "Ich bin en nlte rat,
Vom splelo wer Ich gar net mat."
i:r hot tile best gelk In tier lot,
Slo hot 11m doclt noch nix gehat.
Sle gelk Is gut, tier spieler schlceht,
Des splelo gehtals nlo net reclit;
Der OrirmW gielcht tlio niett ah gut,
llr lacht als wan er splelo dut.
Set kopp Is grosr, sel gelk is gut,
Kr hot ah immcr frischer mut ;
Der anentUed splelt bal tag utul naeht,
lTn welt am cud list ausgelaeht.
Ach, (Incndied heb del kopp doch grad,
1 Jot lials vvaclist gruin, sel wer Jo scliadt ;
Kn spieler musz der kopp grad hewe,
Vom splelo kaner sunstnet lewe.
Mehncr will Ich tloch net sage,
Hs kumt noch runs in wenlg tage;
Us geht vlelelcht en harte lull.
No mag er lacho wle er will.
cfctcrt Sa If.
a oi'.iiman i,i:oi:ni).
A .slight .sluuUIor ctuiiu over mo as 1
was; ctiteriiifj tho inner court of tho Col
logo' of (Jottingcii. It wis, however,
but momentary, ami 011 recovering from
it, 1 felt both taller and heavier, ami
altogether more vigorous than tho in
stant before. Hoing rather nervous I
did not much litiml the.so feeling, im
puting tiiein to tome sudden determi
nation to the brain, or soma unusual
heating about tho heart, which had as
sailed 1110 suddenly, and as suddenly
left me. On jiroeeedlug, 1 met a stu
dent coming in tho opposlto direction.
I had nover seen him before, but as ho
passed mc by, he nodded familiarly-
"There is a lino day, 'Wolstang."
" What doeu thi' fellow mean V" said I
to myself. "He speaks to mo with ns
much easo as if 1 bail been his intimate
tuMiuaiutHiice. And ho calls mo Wol
stang a peixm to whom I bear 110 more
resemblance than to tho man in the
moon." I looked after him for some
line, pondering whether 1 should call
ii in lurk and demand an explanation;
but befmv I could form any resolution,
ic was out of my sight.
Thinking it needless to take any fur
ther notico of the circumstance, I went
011. Another student, whom 1 did not
!;now, now passed 1110 " Charming
weather, WoKtang." "Wolstang a-
gain'." said 1; "inis is lnsuiieraoio,
Iollo, I say ! what do you mean V" Hut
at this very moment lie entered tho li
brary, and either did not hear my voice,
or paid no attention to it.
As I was standing in a nioou between
ago and vexation, a batch of Collegians
came up, talking louti and laugmng,
Three, with whom I was intimately no
iiiaintcd, took no notico 01 mo; wnlio
two, to whom I was totally unknown
saluted me with "Ciood morning, 01
stung." One of theso latter, after hav
ing nasscd 1110 a few yards, turned round
and cried out "Wolstang, your cap is
I did not know what to mako of this
preposterous conduct. Could it bo pro
meditated'.' It was hardly poislble.or
I uiifet havo discovered tho trick In tho
otintcuance of tho-o who addressed me
Could it bo that they really mistook me
for Wolstang? This was still moro in
credible, for Wolstang was fully his
inches taller, four stones heavier, ir
ten years older than I. I found myclf
In a inazoof bewilderment In emle" 01
ing to discover tho causo of all tf 1
relleeted upon It in vain, summf""1!? to
my assistance tlio aids of pS ""d
Metaphysics to unravel the mystery.
Xav, Undid was not forgot011- 1 "'
ed to mind tlio intricatoVroblems of
science which a rigid"'!; of this
l'rinco of Mathematical''' "Ml c"'cu
mntosnlvo: but. 01lW:0 I''seilt OCCtl-
sion.my thoughts, yJJUBli screwed to
the utmost pitch on""'"!"""-'"
men, completely 1 their aim.
While medltatlK m in a reverio on
the.o events, I wJuroiised by approach
lug steps, otwking up, I beheld the
mo-t learlled,"'0''0,' Dwllmtis Duiider
lteul I'rovo- 1111(1 I'roftvsor of Moral
Philosophy." h0 eollcgc. Ho was a
man abqu'llv(! fL'L'' '''b'1 i luit b0 far M
rOtlllXllt 1 r C'llliiuitlliuii VVWIll, IIUVV1SU
dctlcicn' " tli" contrary, he was un-
'r.lt, (..t nml lit Imitr-vviiUtoil
r t'lilllinrv "M '
1 ,--t.0;lt of ollke, bllltoillng over a
" nl!i lmy hll0,ra, underneath n
If (j IjUxeilfd lit tho kliet'S with largo
buckles of silver. Tho doctor Had 011
as usual, his cocked hat, below whoso
rim at each side descended tho joplous
curls of an Immense bob-wig. Kis largo
carbuncle noso was adorned wlti a pair
of spectacles, through which lit looked
pompously from sldo to side, holding
back his head In grenadier fuslion, and
knocking his long sllvcr-hcadd baton
lo tiio earth, as ho walked, wltl nil tho
formal precision of a druin-majir.
Now bo It known that It is bliding on
every student who attends thounlver-
slty of Oottliigcn, to doff his cup on
meeting thlslllustrlouspcrsona'e. This
Is not an optional ceremony it Is a
compulsory onu; nnd never ot any oc
casion haslt been known tobonglected,
except onco by 11 Dutchman, who, in
consequence thereof, was explicit tho
college. It mny bo guessed t en what
was my degree of situpcfactio. when 1
saw Doctor Dunderhead iniroach
I heard Ills baton striking ipon tho
ground, responsive to his stca when
I saw his largo eyes, reflected through
tho spectacles, looking Intel ly upon
me I say my stupefaction may bo
guessed, when, even on this occasion,
my hand did make one sing motion
upward toward my cap. The.ilter still
stuck to my head, and I stoot folded In
my college gown, my mouth mlf open,
and my eyes fixed upon thedoctor In
empty abstraction. I could so that ho
was angry at my tardy recoultlon of
his presence; andashccamciearcrme,
ho slackened his paco a litt - as if to
give me an opportunity onmending
my neglect. However, I was drowned
in reflection that I did not tao the hint.
At last ho made a sudden sttj directly
in front of me, folded his ans in the
same manner as mine, and .oking up
wards in my face with a fbd glance,
as much as to say, "Well, nster, what
now?" I never thought tl doctor so
little, or myself so tall, as this mo
Having continued some tno in tho
I abovo attitude, ho took off s hat nnd
mado mo a profound bow. Mr. Wol
stang, I am your mosthumb servant."
Then rising up, he lifted li baton to
wards my cap, and knotcd it off.
Your cap Is awry," contiuihe. 'Ex
cuse mc, Mr. Wolstang, it ically awry
upon your head." Anotr bow of
mockery, as profound as ti first, fol
lowed this action; nnd marched
iiwny, striking his baton oiheground,
holding backhis head, and viking with
slow, pompous step dowr,hocollego
' What is tlio meaning cthls?" said
I. "Wolstang again I Couslbn, this
is no trick! Tho provost (the1 college
engaged in a deception un'ino im
possible 1 They aro all m,or I am
mad I Wolstang from oijWolstang
from another Wolstang rnj Doctor
Dedlmus Dunderhead! I lljsee to the
bottom of tills I will go Wolstang's
house Immediately." 1. saying, I
snatched up my cap, put )ri;ny head,
and walked smartly dowthe court to
gain the street whero ho 'ctU Before
I got far, a young man 1; me. " By
tho by, Wolstang, I wislou could let
mo havo tho ten gilders lent you. I
"Ten gilders 1" said II don't owo
you n farthing. I nevcwyour face
beforehand my name Is f Wolstang ;
it is Frederick Stadt.'1' "
" Pslial But, Wolsta, Jayjng Jest
ing aside," continued In!I must posi
tively havo them." 3HI
"Havo what?" jH
" My dear fellow, tho gilders."
"Ten dovllsl I tell Vl'don't owe
you a farthing." '
"Really, Wolstang, popo Is very
silly. Wo know you ninjjdd fellow,
but tills Is the most fooipnink I over
saw you play." 7 IjJSS
" Wolstang ngaln l't j lj?my bcart
boiling with InUIgnatilf;;! toll you
sir, that, that" -i coiJBt get out
another word, to such juree had in
dignation confounded : Without
finishing my sentence, Shed into tho
street, but npt without ring tlio per
son say, "By heaven, is cither mad
or drunk J''
In a irioment I wat AVoIstang's
lodging, and got the ocker a-going
with violence. Tho ct was opened
by Ms servant girl Iiso, a buxom
woach of somo eightec-i" twenty.
' Is Mr. Wolstang i-' I demanded
"Mr. who, sir?"
" Mr. Wolstang, invar."
"Mr. AVol Mr.'o, sirV-I did
not hear you. "
" Air. Wolstang."
"Air. Wolstang!" r-'boed tlio girl,
with some surprise.
" Assuredly, I ask ycfMr. Wolstang
"Air. Wolstang!" re.atcdshe. "JIa,
ha,ha,liow droll you an-day, master."
" What do you men' cried I inn
fury, which I now foi It Impossible,
to suppress. "Tell mhis instant if
Mr. Wolstaug, your mer, is at homo,
or by tho beard of Socri I"
" 11a, ha! this is thoocrest thing I
ever heard of," saldtllttlo Jade, re
treating into tho housUid holding her
sides with laughter, imo hero, Bar
nabas, and hear our liter asking tor
I now thought thitho rago into
which I had thrown ysolf had ex
cited tho laughter ofM'eneh, whom
I know very well to bifrollcsouio dis
position, and much pood to turn
people into ridicule. Jereforo put on
as grave a face as I con I even threw
n biiiilo Into It, and n with all tho
composure and good-mour I could
inu ster " Come now, i dear conduct
mo to your master I nm suro ho is
within." Tills only set her n-laughing
moro than over ; not a word could I got
out of her. As last Barnabas mado his
appearnncofroin tho kitchen, and tohlm
I nddrcsscd myself. "Barnabas," said
1, laying my hand upon his arm,
conjuro you, us you value my happiness.
to ten mo If Mr. Wolstang is at home?
"Sir!" said Barnabas, with n long
I repeated my question.
" Did you ask." replied lie, "if Mr,
Wolstang was nt homo? If that gentle
man is yourself, ho Is at homo. O yes.
J wnrarnt you, my mestcr is at homo,
"In what place Islte then?" I inquired
" hcrovcr you arc ho is not far off, I
warrant you, master."
"Can I find him in his study?"
"O yes," continued tBaruabas, "if
you go to his study, I warrant you he'll
no mere. ill you please to walk in
sir ?" and I could seethe fellow put ills
linger 10 nis noso. As soon ns I was in
the study sho burst Into a loud lauirh.
which ended by her declaring that I
must be mad " Or drunk," quoth tho
sapient uarnabas, In his usual dry
On entering the room, 110 person was
to bo seen ; but from behind a largo
screen, wnicn stood fronting tho fire, I
heard a sneeze. "This must bo Wol
stnug," thought I ; "but it is not his
sneeze cither ; it is too shnrp and finical
ror him ; however, let us see." So 1
went behind tlio screen, nnd tliero be.
held, not tho person I expected, but one
very diiierent to wit, a little, meagre,
brown-faced, elderly gelltloman, witii
iiooiccd noso and chin, a long well now.
dered rjueue, and a wooden leg. Ho was
dressed In n snuff-coloured surtout, a
scarlet waistcoat, and black small
clothes, buckled at tlio kneo; nnd on
Ills noso was stuck a pair of tortoise-shell
spectacles, tlio glasses of which were of
most unusual dimensions. A dapper
lookihgeocked lint lay upon the table,
logetner with a largo open snuir-box
full of rich rappee. Behind Ids right
ear a pen was stuck, after the manner
of tho counting-house, and he seemed
busily poring over a book in mntiu
1 looked a few seconds at this odditv.
equally astonished and vexed at beintr
put into, what I naturally supposed the
wrong room. "I am afraid, sir" said I,
as lie turned ins eyes towards me. "that
I havo intruded upon your privacy. I
beg leave to npoiogiso for tho mistake.
Tho servant led 1110 to believe that Mr,
"Wolstang, with whom I wish to speak,
was in this chamber."
Don't talk ofapology, my dearsir.'
said tlio little gentleman, rising up and
Dowmgwnii tlio utmost politeness. "Bo
seated, sir be seated. Indeed I am
Just hero on tho same errand to see Air,
AVoIstang oh, (a siieezp,) that rappeo is
certainly very strong. Do mo tlio lion
our to occupy tlio seat opposite. I un
derstand from tho servants that he is
expected soon." (Another sneeze.)
I'or tho first five minutes I did not
form a very high opinion of this now
acquaintance. Ho seemed to have all
tho'fidgetty politeness, and intolerable
chit-chat of a French petit maltrc of tho
old school. Ho bored mc witii ouestions
and npologies, hoped I felt myself com
fortablo; and every interval of his
speech was filled up by intolerable, gig'
gungnnd sneezing. In order, as it were
to increase tho latter, li6,kept,siniillnfr
11 way i u preposwrouBraie jjjanaiwnen
no autirc8scu;mo,-;iiisimouin was drawn
up into a most complacent smllo, and
his longnoso and chin, which threatened
each other like nut-crackers, thrown
forward to within n foot of my face.
However, lu tho next five minutes ho
Improved upon me, from somo very
Judicious observations, as I thought,
which he made, and in five more 1 be
came convinced, that notwithstanding
his outward frivolity and sneezing, ho
whs far from being an ordinnry man.
This impression gained such strength,
in a short tlmo I entirely forgot all my
previous Irritation, and even the reasons
which brought mo there. I found that
ho had a complete knowledge of tlio
different philosophical systems of the
day ; among others, that of my favour-
ito Kant: and on tho merits of tho
school lu tho north of Gcrmany,founded
by the great metaphysician, Ills opin
ions mid mine tallied to a point. Ho
also seemed deeply conversant with
tho mathematics. This was a subject
on which I ilattered myself 1 had few
equals; but ho shot far ahead of mc,
displaying a knowlcdgo which scarcely
any man In Europceould havo matched,
He traced tho scienco downwards, In
nil its historical bearings', from Thales,
Archimedes, and Euclid, to Newton,
Euler, Leibnitz, nnd Laplace. In al
gebra, geometry, and astronomy, his
Information won equally extensive.
From sovoral hints which hu threw out
I learned that ho was not stranger to
tho scienco of geomancy ; and ho gavo
mo to understand, that ho had cast the
nativities of several individuals belong
ing to noblo families; and that ns their
horoscopes portended, such invariably
was their fato in after-life. Xor was his
knowledge confined to thco abstruser
branches of science. It embraced tho
whole circle of literature and tho fine
arts. Poetry, criticism, philology, paint
ing, and sculpture, seemed to bo equally
within his range. IIo descanted upon
them, Illuminating his positions from
such a vast source of illustration, that I
gazed upon him with a feeling akin to
Let it not bo supposed that till this
was done with tho formal pomp of a
philosopher. On tho contrary, ho pre
served throughout hi frivolotisiiess of
manner, npologlscTIJur ovcry thing ho
advanced, hoped I was not offended If
ho differed in opinion from mo, nnd
concluded ovcry position with a sneeze.
"By the by," said I, "talking of Gall
and Spurzlicliu, what do you think of
their doctrine?, 1 nm.lncllncd to bolluvo
tliero must bo some truth in it; at least
I havo seen It verified in n number of
lieads.andttinongothcrslntlint of Cicero,
which I saw n few years ago in tho
sculpture-gallery of the Louvre. It was
a beautiful head."
"You aro right there, my dear friend,"
replied lie. Tho t'cad, phrcnologlcally
considered, is oxiremely beautiful, I
believe I havo got it in my pocket."
"You got the head of Cicero in your
pocket!" cried 1, witii surprise.
"Ono! not nlHolutely tho head of
Cicero," said he, smiling. "Mark An
f that but only lils bust
n miniature of that bust?"
a miniature, but tho real
bustrorlr; It comes how heavy It is!"
And, to my amazement, I saw him
take out of his pocket the identical bust,
nslurgonsllfe, of tho Boman orator.
and place It on the tablo before me.
"Havo you any moro heads of this
description about you?" said I, not a
little marvelling how he was able to
stuff such a block of marble into his
"I havo n fow others at your service,
my dear friend. Nnmo any ono you
would wish to see, and I shall bo most
happy to produce it."
" Lot mo sec then tho head of Coner-
nicus." I hadscarcclyspoken the word
when ho brought out the philosopher,
mid put him besido Cicero. I named
successively Socrates, Thales, Galileo,
Confucius, Zoroaster, Tyclio Brache,
Itogcr Bacon, and Paracelsus and
straightway they stood upon the fable
as fresh as If they had just received the
last touch of tho sculptor's chisel. I
must confess tlint such a number of large
heads emanating from tho pocket of the
little meagro man in tlio snuff-coloured
surtout nnd thesenrlot waistcoat, would
have occasioned 1110 incredible wonder.
had my .stock of astonishment not been
exhausted by tlio proviouo display of his
abilities. I had little moro to throw
away upon nny new subject, and looked
upon these fresh exhibitions without
experiencing any tiling beyond a slight
"And do you," I demanded, as tho last
nnmcd was brought forth, "nlwayscarry
those heads about withyou ?"
I generally do so for the amusement
of iy friends," answered he. "But do
not think that my stock is exhausted :
I have still n fow moro that I can show
you for instance, Pythagoras."
"Pythagoras!" exclaimed I; "no,
don't produco him. Ho is tho last of
all the philosophers I would wish to see.
Tlio Stoics, tho Epicureans, ay, even tho
Cynics, with Diogenes or Mcnippiis at
their head, worofsatres eoinnnrnl wlHi
Pythagoras, tljofounder of tho. mast
preposterous system of philosophy"lhat
"My dear friend," said tho little man.
with unusual gravity, "you do not say
I do say so. Pythagoras was a, fool,
a madman,, an impostor." ,
"You don't speak thus of tho'dlvino
Pythagoras?" returned hoT putting lils
bust upon tho table.
" No, not of tho divine Pythagoros.
for such a person nover existed. I speak
of Pythagoras the Samhin him of tho
golden thigh, the founder of what is
called tlio Pythagorean philosophy."
iVnd the most rational system of
philosophy that everexisted. Begging
your pardon, I think it goes far beyond
that of Plato or tho Stngyrite."
" If you mean that it goes beyond
them in being ns full of absurdity as
they tire of wisdom, I readily agree
with you," said I, my anger rising at
hearing tliedivlnodoetrinesof Aris-totle,
and tlio disciple of Socrates, so irrever
ently spoken of.
"Pray, what were Its absurdities?"
asked ho witii tho most imperturbable
"Did not Pythagoras enjoin silence
to his disciples for n period ufllvo years
And a very gooff injunction It was.
No man can ben philosopher unless he
knows how to keep Ids tonguo under
"I nm afraid then oti will never bo
one," I remarked, forcing a smile, al
though I was at bottom considerably
nettled. Ho did not seem to take mv
observation ill, but passed it off witii one
of Ids characteristic giggles of laughter.
" ou were talking of his absurdities,
my dear friend,"
"All, well, did ho not forbid tiio use
if animal food to his followers? and, to
crown all did lie not teach tlio monstrous
doctrine of transmigration of souls;
Bending tho spirits of men, after death,
to Inhabit tho bodies of dogs, and cats,
nud frogs, and geeso nnd oven insects?"
" And call you this a monstrous doe
trino?" " Alonstrous !" I exclaimed witii sur
prise. "It is tlieiif ptttsultra, tluicliniax
of fatuity, the raving of a disordered
"Soyoudo notbellevoln Metemp-y-chosls?
asked he, with a smile.
10 in; cos.ri.Ni'K.11.)
It is estimated that tliero tiro thirty
two and one-half millions of sheep in
tho loyal twenty Slates and two terrltn
rles. It is supposed that theanntial mini
her of lambs will bo over twenty-four
PRICE FIVE CENTS.
"Ma, why Is a postage stamp r.'
had scholar ?" "I can't tell mvson ; why
Is It?" " Because it gets licked nnd put
In a corner."
A Lawykii nsked n diitchman in
court what ear marks a pig had, that
was lu dispute. "Veil, ho lias no ear
marks except a very short tall,"
A Lad wiio had borrowed n diction
ary to read, returned it nftcrhohnd g t
through, with tho remark: "H was
worry nico reading, but it somehow
changed tlio subject worry often."
Somi: years ago 11 farmer, living In a
village bordering on Berks county, fur
nished 0110 of ids thrco sons with a sum
of money nnd told him to go to tlio
West nml remain two years, nt tlio end
of which tlmo lie should return to Lan
caster, stop at Scotleld's, anil onu of them
would bo tliero to meet him. Tlio young
man started, and at tho end of the speci
fied tlmo ho returned. It should bo pro
mised that telegraphs wero not then in
existence, tlio postal system was not as
perfect as to-day, nnd literary attain
ments wero not so general as they aro
now, lienco 110 communication took
place between tho brothers. Ho return
ed, however, as ho said. His brother
was there to meet him nnd tiiev botli
proceeded homo In 11 buggy. Tlio wan
derer, after relating somo of his adven
tures, cnqulredJfnnytliing had happen
ed since ho leftimo.
"No, not a single thing," said tlio
other, "everything is Just the same as
when you left-except that old crow
"Indeed," said tiio wnndercr, "and
is tlio old crow (lead ?,what killed him."
"Why ho ato too much meat when
the match horses died."
"Good gracious! are tlio matches dead
what killed them?"
"Why you see when tho house nnd
bam burned down they overdid them
selves In hauling water."
"Good gracious! are tlio house nnd
barn burned down how did it Imp
pen?" "Well you see when daddy died, they
wero currying lights around and were
"Good gracious! and daddy dead .
wbnt was tlio matter with him?"
"Well, you see when our Sal went
away and got married against daddy's
wishes, hojust pined away and died."
"Good gracious! so nothing has hap
pened since I've been away?"
'Xo, everything isjust tlio same."
Josu Bili.inoh ok Courtship.
Court in is a luxury, it is ice water, it is
the pla spoil of the sole. Tho man who
has nover courted hasllvedin vain. Ho
has been a blind man among landscapes,
helms been luleffman in tholandof hand
organs and by tho side of murmuriu
canals. Courtin is likotwo little springs
of water that start out from under a
rock at tho footVoftho mountain, md
run down hill; side by side, sii.gin,
dnncin, spattcrin each other, eddvin.
and frothin, kaskadin, now hidden un
der tlio bank, liowvfull of shadder, by
cmby thoyJlno."nud alien go slow. I
am in favorof long courtin ; it gives the
partyaciinnco to find each otho-'H trump
cards. It is good exercise, and is lust ns
Innocent as 6 merino Iambi.
Courtin is likostrawberries nnd cream;
wants to bo did slow, and then you havo
got tlio flavor . I have seen folks get
acquainted, fall in lovc.get married, set
tio down, nud go to work in three weeks
This is tlio way that somo folks lam n
trade, and akounts for the great number
of ability mean mechanicsand poor Jo'"
they turn out.
Perhaps it is best I shoti'-' state sum
good ndvico to yong ir-n who aro about
to court with a vlrn' or matrimony, nslt
In the "!t place, young men, you
want co get your system awful right,
then find a young woman who is willing
to bo courted on tho square.
Tho next thing is to find out how old
she is, which you can do by asking her,
nml slio will s-a sin. is lu years old, and
mis you win unit will not bo far out of
Tho next tiling is to begin moderate,
sa onco every nito in tho week for tlio
fust six mouths, Increasing tho dose nt
the pashens seems to require.
It Is a fust rate way to court tlio girl's
mother a little on the stnrt, for tliero Is
0110 tiling a woman never despises, nnd
Hint is a littlogooil courtin, if It is done
on the square.
After tho first year you will begin to
like tho blzlness.
There is one thing I always advise.
that Is not to swop photygniphs oftcner
than wtinst every l(i daze, unless you
forget how the gal looks.
Ockasloimlly you want to look sorry
and draw in your wind as tlio you had
a pain; this will set tho gal tu teezln
you to find out what alls you.
Lveiiln incetlns are n good thing to
tend. It will keep yuroreligion in tune,
and if yuro gal happens to bo there, hi
accident, sho can ask you to go homo
A si a general thing, 1 wouldn't brag
on other girls much when I was courtin.
It might look as though you knew luo
If yu court threo weeks In this v ,y,
alltholiino on the square, If you (b 't
sn it is tlio sleekest time of yure life yu
can go to the cheap store and get i. 11
sured for a plug hat at my expeiist anil
pay for It.