Newspaper Page Text
VOL. I.-NO. 22.
HOTELS AND SALOONS. I
J on o i o x ii o"t"k h .
'I in: HiulerslKiied having lensed nnd re-furnish- I
cilhiKiHHl Mjlu tlii; iibiio vtell-liiiuvvii House,
AJIOSd TIM! MOPNTA1NH
til the borders of Ciiluinblaniid Kutllvnti eniinltes,
111 one nr tho most beautiful and henllhflil roulnns
In the state! Is ruliv prepared to n-eninnusl.i.ti.
visitors uiul sojourners
with Tiinin pamilh:..
The Point nml streams nro well stoeked with
ilollelous ilsh of many kinds includliiK
T II O t' T A N 1) I' I K I!,
nml bonis In Rood order will lin l;ct for theiie
'iuiiiiiiiilntl(m nml nniiisemeiit of uuests, either
for ilshlmt nrplensuiiiexeurslousttpoii this beau
tlfnl sheet of water vv hlch Is
ht.viuial Miu-.s in i:xti:nt.
rjiii-rmindeil by an extensive Purest, there Is nft'or.
iled totho huntsman a spluulld Held for Ills own
peculiar spurts, ami exeiclsu with Ills
1) O (I AN 1) (I U N.
Ills I.-irder will bo always provided with the
ilellenc-tes of llicHonxoiii ami his liar stoeked w Itli
I'uiii: Linrmtj. T ho House Is larijoaiid eomino
illoiis : tho StuliIliiK extensive ami Kate.
rim House Is renehed from several points on
(ho lllooiiiblnirff Lackawanna ltallmailj ami Is
a splendid ptaec to pass the hot months or Mum.
lm?,r- ,. , IIAVHUIWT.
Jluy 17, lS07-lm.
JLJ llLOO.MSJllUIia, COLU.MlltA COUNTY, I'A.
The. undersigned linvlng purc-hnsed this well
known ami com rally-located house, the. lIxchniiKu
lintel, situate on MAIN .STRUCT, In llloomsburi;,
Immeillatelyopiiosltotho Colunilila County Court
House, respectfully Informs his friend and the
public lu Kcneral that his houso Is now hi order
for the reception nml entertainment of trnvellcis
ho may bo disposed to favor It with Ihelr cus
tom. He. has spared no expenso lu preparing tho
l'.xthanKo for tho entertainment of his miosis,
neither slinll there ho atiythlmr wanttnu (on Ids
part) t" minister to their personal eomlort. Ills
house Is spacious, and enjoys an excellent busi
Onnilbusses run at all times between the V.x
chiiUKD Hotel ami tho vurlni s railroad depots, by
which tiavellcrs will bo pleasantly coneyeil to
nnd from tho respective stations In duo ttnie to
meet tho cars. JOHN V. CAHLOW.
Illoomsburir, March IsM.
ij u Jin i a nous E,
ii v. u n a n I) STOH j; n it .
JIavino lfttoly puifhasod nnd fltliHl Hp tlio
well-known ltoblsoii Hotel l'topeity, Io.ntt'ila
FKW ItftOIH A1WIVF. TIIH COl'KT llOUrtP,
niitliosnmo uhln of tlio street. In tlio town of
Illoomsburtf; mnl having ubtalncnl a llccnsu for
It K B T A U It A X T ,
the Proprietor has determined IokIvo to tho peo
ple visiting tlio town on business or pleasure,
A i.itti.i: jioiii; ltoo-M.
His stabllni! also Is extensive, and Is tilted up
to put buuKlesondearrlai's in t tie dry. He proin
Iscsthat everything about ills establishment shall
bo conducted In an oiderly nnd lawlul manner;
nnd ho respoctlully solicits n share of the publlo
21, SI, Si A 27, llltOADWAY, X. Y.
Opposite Jlou-Uuff Green.
OX THE i:UUOI'KA.V 1'I.AK,
Tni; Hti:vi:ns HorsK is well mid widely known
to the traveling publlo. Tlio location is especial
ly suitable to merchants and business men; it is
In eloso proximity to tlio business part of t tie city
is on tho highway of Southern nnd Western
tmvclnml adjacent to all tlio prlneliml railluad
and steamboat depots.
'ihoMeciis Houso Jus liberal neeonimodation
for over 300 guests ills will turnishi'il, anil pos
sesses every moderate lmpmvcmcut for the eoui
lort and eiiteilalnment of its Inmates. 'J lie
moms are spacious and well ventilated provided
Willi gas unit water tho nttoliduHco Is prompt
nnd respectlul and the talilo Is generously pro
vided with every delicacy of the season at mod
erate rates, mi), ic. I'liAsr. a co.
ai'.OKUi: W. MAUClKlt, Proprietor,
Tho abovo well-known hotel has lecenlly under
gone radical changes lu its internal arrangements,
mid lis proprietor ituliounceK to his torliu r custom
Jind tho travelling public that his accomodations
for thoconi'oit oi ids guestsaiuseeond to none lu
tlio counlrv. His table will always bo found sup
plied, not only Willi substantial food, but Ulliall
the itelleaciesof tho season. Ills wines nud 11
tiuors (except that ponul-ir lieemge known as
''JWfuir"l,purcliaseddlicct troin llin tlnpoillng
bouses, are entirelv imre, and Tree from ull pol
Houousilrilgs, He Isthnnklul foraliberal iiatrou
ago ill tho past, nud will continue to deserve It in
the future. i:i:oit(ii: w. m.u'oi:!!.
rjl H E HVA X HOTEL,
Tilt: UlTKit itofsi:,
or.ANar.vii.i.i:, com-miiia co., r..
'fhs subscriber resncilfully lurorms ids filcmls
and the public, that ho has taken the nliovi well
kunWu Houso of Kiiteitalnmi nt, and will be
pleased In leeelve Hie custom ol ail who will
lav or him with a call.
in: wiij. Ki:i:r a ciood taum:,
n liar well stocked with the best of Liquors, and
eveiv eilort will bo made to render nil he satis
faction. JOHN hXYDHK.
Orangevllie, I'n., March 13, lsi,7-lm.
Tin-: Proprietor of the Hxchange Saloon has now
on hand a largo stock of
Ki'iCKH i)VHri:i:.s, HAiiiiixiiS, Tiui'K, uoi.onxAS
hiiKKP TONari:, nmi.KD Kiuis, swr.iTZKi: ritKii
l.ACiElt ItEEIt, ALE, AO.
jot com: oxi:, com: am. and six. -51
I.AWSOX CA I.MAX.
Illoomsliurg, May 3, 1S07.
rpjlE ESPY HOTEL,
IMl'V, rOI.UMUIA COUNTY, PA,
Thk Miliscrilier n sjiei tfully Infoi inslils fi lends
nnd the piilille, that lie has taluu tho aliove well
known Huuso ot i:nleitalniiKiit, and will ho
pleased lo rieelvo lllo lllsioill 01 an who win
i. iv or mm Willi a can.
in: ni.fi ki:i:p a cood taum:,
liar well siocl.eil Willi tho best of I.lquois, and
Very ellolt will be inane lo roliuer eniiie s
laetlon. WM. HKMl.m.
Hspy, I'll., April li, Ili7.
OlIAXtlCVIM.i:, COI.UMMA COUNTY, PA.
l.SUAlir, MU.M.MA, I'l'.OPIHUTOlt.
Having taken imsiesslon of this well-known
house, so long kept by Samuel llverett, tlio Pro
lirletoiiiiisiiutiullisriiiaueut repalrand lurnlsh
ed HAlt A Nil lt.UIJKlt w Mil the choicest liquors
and newest delicacies. Ills stable Is not oxd llod
111 tlio county; and no pnlns will bo spared to
nccommmluto guests. npiv 07.
Tlio fllnno Ilott'l luis liitt'ly U'pn iiuiclia.til hy
1II2NUY J. CLAItlC, ami Inn l-ceu thormmlily n
linxIcUtil, ri'juilifil, nml rtfuniWit'il. It will u
found now. In U urmnui'im nt nml npi)lntiiu iit,
u llrst-rlnhs Hotel, nml mwihI to tunio In tliu
country. lVrsmiHlu vlllv wWiliitoML''"l tlie
hot montlw la tlio country, will tin welt to givo
tho proprietor a call.
OT. CHAIUjES HOTEL,,
Nos. mi, (,.', 01, nud Wl North Third streets,
between Maikt t nnd AiihSiiecH,
rjMlE UNION HOTEL,
AlchKtlcet, between Third nnd Pollllll Streets,
Corner of Ninth nml Chestnut Hirecl.s,
11. W. KANAOA,
A ."DomocM'iitiu Xovspwpl"
IS l'l'III.IHIIKI) t.VIUlV FIII1IAY UOll.S'lMI AT
Till: principles of this pa peraroofthe.Ieu-...rson-Inn
School of politics. Those principles will nc er
bocompiomlsod.yctcouitcsy nml klhdcss shall
not bo formittcn In ilUciissIng them, wlielhcr with
Individuals, or with contemporaries of tho Press
Tho unity, happiness, and prosperity of tho coun
try is inir aim and object; and as tho means to
sccurothut, wo shall labor honestly nnd earnestly
for the harmony, succcssnudKrovviliof our organ.
Tmijis ok Ai)Vi:iiTisixa :-()ne Kiunrcden lines
or less) one or three Insertions S1,V; each subse
quent Insertion 50 cents.
Two squares ,1,1a)
Three squares 5,o)
l'our squaiev 0,00
Half column 10,00
Quo column 1 VIM
l 1,00 ai,oo
Hxeciitor'snnd Ailnilnlstrator-s Notice 5:1,00 j Au
ditor's Notice S'.yA Oilier advertisements Inser
ted according to speclnl contract.
Iluslness notices, without advertisement, tv enty
cents per line.
Transient advertisements payable in advance
nil others duo after the first insertion.
itu It is, lu ull cdsea, nioro likely to bo satisfac
tory, both to subscribers ami to tlio Publishers,
that remlttancesnnd all comnlnnlcations respect
ing tho business of tlio paper, bo sent direct to tho
ollicenf publication. All let tern, whether relating
to tho editorial or business concerns of the paper,
and all payments for subscriptions, advertising,
or Jobbing, nro to ho madotomul nddressed
nitocicwAY ,t iT.nr.zt:,
I'linted nt Itobison's lluiiiltngs, near tho Court
House, by Ciias. Jf. VANnnn.st.ici:,
' l''UANK II. SNVliKIt,
rjlIIE hOST CAUSE,
Tin: Oxlv hrAxiiAiii) OrriciAL
SOUTIIEItX IIISTOUY OF
Uy IMwnril A. rollanl.of Virginia.
SAMiTi:r.sf:nvniM':xinsKit op Mirrr.TN
Township, ims iirocurnl tlio Agency of Columbia
County, for the snlo of tho nlmvo woile. It coin-
prises n uiu nccouiu oi inoriso niui progress oi
tho Into Southern Conf.'tlerney, tlio miupnlgns.
buttles, lndilonts nml lulvrntnrcs of the most trl-
gnntlc strugglo of tho WorUrN history. Coinpleto
in one nil go voiuiuo oi ncniiy tHfj juiges, wun
TwnxTV-roun splkxhid sTi:i:r.
of illstlngulsheil Cnufi'ilemto hitlers. The histo
ry of the viunjulshed 1ms too otten fallen to
the pin ot the victor, nml to Inuro Juslne to tho
Southern cause, tho pen must ho taken by wnno
Suiitlit'in ui.iii who is willing to tlevoto his time
nml talents to the vi ml lent ion of his countrymen,
lu n history which shall thallenge the criticism
of tho Intelligent, ami hnlle the attention o) alt
Honest lliquiHTs. Sin-nil HiHK will heol peculiar
luteiestto Ibe t.intllit .ut I hit. lllgrltt ptlhliuof
the Noilll, aii'1 is i it Ihr in hi'tst lmi)rttiuee to tlio
people ol the Striitli.-l ll St.ilt-s. jfr. I'oll.inl, of
nil wrilers hi Hie Jsntith. U (Ioubttes Hie best
iuali tea to iuvd.uv a i-uiiinU tt uiul htnmiuiil
tory of the V nr, ami to commit lo the pies-nt
nml tmuieivui-intloun f.ilthtul ami woiiliy ri1-
'OUlol tliell-ureal slril'C'le niul ol n e.llls Inst.
snelu honor, hnli.ir been ctnploycU (luting tho
enure permu uf ine nr,ascHiior 01 u liieiinnma
Jji C. IjKiIITE k CO.,
1'IItST-rL WS flKAXP AS !l WlL'AIti;
V I A X O V O U T E Hlm
Sole I'.itt ntces of Ughte's ceh bratetl 1'ati nt In-
sulnteil lion rramc. Aienlsmnnkcrsof the ery
best Piano I'oi' les lu the ntatUct.
1!.V1MI lU'.lIN AWAKDIII)
THE HIGHEST PJtKMIUM
A M Ull 1C A X WOUL J'H I'A I 11!
ami the i:hlliltioinifthertKhistiycfallNutions,
besltles numennis oilier
G'OLl) AX) SILVKH AlKDALS,
together with testimonials from all the most dis
tinguished Musical cilebiltles in Kuropu nn-1
America. They ha e also Just received
Tin: ninin:.s,T puhmiu.m
At tlio Illinois Slate Pair!
Tho Indiaiu stalo Pair!
The Iowa Slate Pair!
The Wisconsin State Pair, etc.
In competition with the most celebrated Mann-
f.ieturers of New York. Host Philadelphia,
Watenionis, l-M llriKiine Jtieet, near I'.roadway,
New foils City. Oidcrs by mall pioinplly atlen
ded to. Send for Circular. (JanH'iiT.
WM. F. jIUIU'HY'H SONS,
H T A T I O X K 11 S ,
S T II A M PllWHll PltlNTllllS
11LAXK HOOK .MAXUrACTUltKUS
:UU l'llestnutstleet,,t.V,Solltll rouillistlect,
They nud:e a speciality of furnishing Xatlonnl
Hanks, founty oilleirs, Insiiiamo L'omianlis,
Hanking Houses, ilc, Willi
i:vi:iiY AKTici.i: or iii.ank hooks
having maclilnery specially adiqiled f.irull work
n'.. H.....I Milium Iii'irur of Illooms
liurg and Columbia I'ounty.-I havo appointed
.Mr. II. Ktohner ngeiit lor the sale or my ale, poi ter,
i i . I iv Willi will sllliolv vol!
tit, ,i Btoui, ..' ....
at the same prleetlllld with thesaiiieartlile),ns I
would furnish you from the brewery. Kn siwins
that lie will bo punctual ami am nine o, ..
may favor him with their Irade, I solldt fur him
your support. Very icspectluliy,
1' 1. 1.11 1..VU !,"
Steam llrevvery, Heading, P.i.
- . .....a, 1S
i.ioi:nkh a u u i i .
nm iiik Timm.i-.STii pi:nnsyi.v..ia iusiiiict,
always lo bo found at thp Orangev III" If"!''1.'1'
Ill'llllgev e. sa esol real in .ei..... ... '-j
alt, mhsl to promptly nnd
Cllllsllinnieiusso,,,!.,.,. ,, "".'.. r,,'iieKltcIi,.d.
A slime oi P"o ie iiiiiit.ii.iu,. ,.-i i
U C T l O N E E H.
mim:h iiii'i'.M a:
at lllo.imsbuig, P.i. '
, . .. .. 1...I.I1. V..lni
Manufactururi nud Jobbers of
StKH'H AND HOY'S CLOiill.N'fl,
Nos. 515 Market, uml St! Oouiiiicreo Ktrrct,
BLOOMSBUHG, PA., FRIDAY,
'run .ioi.i.y oi,i I'l-.D.tdiKiPi;.
"I'was ll Jolly old Jiedagogue, long ngn,
Tall ami slender, and sallow nnd dry;
Ills foi in was bent, ami lilsgait wnsslow,
Ills long, thin hair was ns white as snow,
Hut a wonderful t Inkle shone lu his eye j
And he snug every nljlit ns lie went to bed,
"Let us he happy heie below ;
The llv lug should lhe, though the dead ho dead,'
said the Jolly old pedagogue, long ago.
He taught his scholars the mle of three,
Writing and rending, nnd history too,
lie look tho littlo ones upon lilt knee,
Porn kind old.lienrt In blsbienst had he,
And tlio wants of the littlest child ho knew :
'Learn while you're young," he often said,
"There Is much to enjoy down hciobilow;
Lllo for tho living, nnd rost for tho dead I "
Said thojolly old (ledagogue, long ago.
With the Unpldest ho.v s ho was kind and cool,
Hpeaklngonly In gentlest tones;
Tlio rod was hardly known In his school,
Whipping, to him, was n barbarous rule.
And too bard w6rk for bis poor old bones ;
Hostile, It wns painful, ho sometimes said:
"We should mako life plcsant, down hero below,
The living need charity more than tho dead,"
Said the Jolly old pedagogue, long ago.
Ho lived In tlio houso by the hawUiorne lnne ,
With roses nnd woodblno ovtrthodoor;
His rooms vvero rpilet, nud nent, and plain,
Hut n spirit of comfort tliero held reign.
And made him forget ho was old and poor;
"I need so little," ho often said;
"And my friends ami rclatlv es hero below
Won't litigate over lnowheu I mil dead,"
Said tlio Jolly old pedagogue, long ago.
l'.ut tlio pleasantest times that In; had, of nil,
Were tho soclablo hours ho used to pass,
Willi his chair tipped back ton neighbor's wall,
Making an unceremonious call,
Over n plpo nnd a friendly glass:
This was tlio finest pleasure, ho said,
Of tho tho many ho tasted hero below ;
"Who has no cronies, had better bo dead I"
Said tlio Jolly old jiedagogue, long ngo.
Then tlio Jolly old pedagogue's wrinkled faco
Melted all )vcr In sunshiny smiles;
He stlried his gl.vss with nu old-school grace,
Chuckled, and sipiied, and prattled apace,
Till tho houso grew merry, from cellar to tiles;
"I'm a pretty old man," ho gently said,
"I havo lingered a long whtlo heie below ;
Hut my heart Is fresh, If my youth is lied I"
Said tlio Jolly old pedagogue, long ago.
He smoked his pipe In the balmy air,
livery night when tlio sun went down,
Wlillotlie soft wind played in his silvery hair,
Leaving Us tenderest kisses theie.
On the Jolly old peda gogue'sjolly old crown ;
And, feeling the kisses, lie smiled, and said ;
"i'was a glorious wuild, down hero below ;
"Why wait for happiness, till we are dead?"
Said the Jolly old pedagogue, long ago.
Ho sat at his door, one midsummer night,
After tho sun had sunk In tho west.
And the lingering lienins of golden light
f...t.. l.l 1-1. ..11.. ..I.I f..... I....,- I.-1..I.,
' wiiilo tiioodor.Hisii"igiit-wlndwiilspered"itest!ll;ra""y. look one t ido iintl then another
Gently, Gently, lie bowed his bond
Tlieie vvero angels waiting for him, I know
He was sure of happiness, living or dead,
Tills Jolly old pedagogue, long ago I
the" cdrxTitv postmaster".
A cor.vniY I'o-tolllce, as a general
matter, is .-imply n country store, with .
some odd corner railed oil' fur secrc-y,
if not security. Anybody can go
around behind tliercif ho is so fortunato
as to be. in tho confidence social or po-1
litii'iil of the village po-tmn-tci'. It is
chiefly tho women who step up to that
desk timidly and doubtlngly, ns if ask
ing a favor or sidle along as girls do,
and Inquire for a letter in tlio softest
whkper, least even their names should
be proiiuitml aloud in tho public pres
ence. To the rude boys tho place is
varulre. For tbc'in alone is the rude
iron rail spiked down so rigidly into
tlie counter to keep oil' troti-ers' stuffs
and heavy swinging boots.
Kegs ami barrels nail boxes and
soap and boys women and dogs tho
box stove and tho department letter
boxes are all mingled at the post oiilco
establishment with plcturestmo incon
gruity. Ofa close, wintry evening tho
apartment is redolent of savors milium
bi'ieiltuid indescribable. A row of men
sit perched upon tlio smooth-faced
...,.- ., i-ni. nf lines nml moll irifl.
sit on boxes and nail kegs opposite the
stove; whistling idlers stand and stare
it the hoe nud mop handles so nicely
balanced overhead, possibly calculating
if they would "hurt" much if they fell
on their crowns ; tho iron stove roars,
and growl-, and sputters, from being 1
frequently stiled up with sticks; little
biivs come in every few minutes and
look up into the expreslonless faces of
i .it.il,llv nm..n,l-or ll-tcn
vidv. will, .men mouths, to what
they happen to bo gossiping about and
then run uneasily out again ; in mo soi
emu pauses, the dull and heavy ticking
dfa wooden wheeled Connecticut clock,
perched upamong tliosnulVJars nud pre
serve lots, sound like Fato solemnly
n.itchingoll Time, as it pa-scs; now and
tin. ii niie of them with till ttdlter sen-o
of hearing (or longer ears perhaps than 1
the rest, lifts his head and ivnnoucos
that tho "stage is coming ;" turn, line
tho turning over of your hand, all pros-1
out get up nnd shako themselves out ,
against the arrival of ho govorumen
ine-siiiL'er anil t ie etcliing oi hid man
HU. His" "
Kli-'s. . . ,. .
Their wives nro at noine,poor wumeii i
olsi. how would tho ullalrs ot tliu liouso
trot on'.' V "'' must not go n gadding;
i,,, i i, o w lev must nit anoiii in
tile poslofUeo till they havo to conio
h.itnef.ir patches to their trousers' seals;
and not a word of complaint must bo
uttered against it.
Well, and the mail-coach rattles up.
The heavy rattlingof tho wheels makes
nittsie against tho sido or tho meeting
house, and fills the town with tho notes
of Its warning. Tho postotllco door
opens nnd forth steps n boy to tnko tho
mull. Tlio cluttered littlo oiilco In In
stnntly in a hubbub. Every eyo Is
turned on tlio iimllbaKnnd tlio postmas
ter. At this vartlctilrtr moment tho lat
ter U nt hU zenith. Tho by-s,(uiidcrs
watch him, ho proceeds toempty there
sponslblo pouch of Its precious content.
They count up every package, parcel
and newspaper that comes to tho light,
and appear ns much pleased with what
they discover as children nro over tho
miscellaneous contents of their Christ-nias-!jtocUIno;s.
Alany of thoso nearest tho counter,
and those who, by reason of ncoorprop-
erty-value, feel "privileged" In the
place, venturo upon taking n piece or
llwo of mail-matter into their hands,
which they proceed to "heffand niako
shrewd computations about. Some of
tho more forward lads crowd up under
the men's elbows ; nnd you can And an
odd head here, nnd nil odd body there,
and a spare leg or nnn somewhere else.
which anatomically arranged, would
falrly present you witli tlio manners
common to country boys 'In tho postof
fico at tlio hour when tho mall arrives.
In good time, tho contents of tho bag
are all assorted; that is to say after
waiting, nnd waiting. It would aston
ish an old Hollander himself what n
dreadfully slow man tho country post
master is; tlio moro tliero is pressing
upon him for dispatch, tho less ho Is ac
tuallyablcto accomplish. Xothlngcon
fuscs him,for ho will not permit it. Still
the miscellaneous talk about tho room
docs bother him, nnd ho now and then
looks up sharply over his spectacles, ns
n thorough schoolmaster looks around
his littlo renlm of n schoolroom.
When, nt length, thccriticnl moment
does come, ho begins without tho
perceptible flutter of n nerve. "Mr. At
kins!" ho calls out, in n tono of appro
priate solemnity. Tho gentleman by
that nnnio makes n half bow, as if ho
would say, "Excuso mo for n moment,
all hands !" slips olT his seat on tlio head
of a barrel of Genesee flour standing in
tho darkest corner, and sunnlieantlv
holds out his hand abovo the counter ; I
or. if ho ennnnt nlorce thn prnvnl. n. flln
' of good men and true pa-s over the doc
uments to him from headquarters, ev-
i cry ono of whom embraces such opor-
i Utility to study tho postmark as the tal-
I lowy flaro of light nfibrds him.
"Mr. Battles!" again sends up tho
official at tho desk. Everybody looks
around to find Mr. Battles. Ho is
sought after with as anxious caro as tho
I humlreth sheep that went astray. Ills
acquaintances explore every corncrand
i of the fetoveiiinc. antfllnallv resnnnd.
'"Xothero!" Then "Mr. Knnnikin!"
Ho comes forward as far as tlio jam per
mits him, nnd is put in possession of his
mall much after tho style of Mr. Atkins.
Then "Miss Fairdale!" At which
some of tlio young men exchange jokes
in a low voice, while a littlo boy who
has been onthe look-out for his pretty
sister reaches out his tawny hand and
make an ell'ectivo grab forit, and carries
On mooted points of law especially
constitutional law tho country post
master is strong beyond any ono's esti
mate. Ho has the niother-wit to keep
a handful ofstrny old Congressional He
ports, bound and lettered on tho dusky
shelf nt his back as wellas a moro solid
looking copy of tho Statutes, in Impos
ing calf ; mid, with this legal stock in
trade, lie sets the town at defiance.
Even Goldsmith's) schoolmaster is no
match for him in tho lino of "arguing
still." Xot even n member of tho Pres
ident's Cabinet can give tin opinion with
moro pragmatic precision, or deliver
himself wlthgreaterassuranco oftho in
tentions of the august Washington au
thorities. Xational politics tako their
local coloring by being passed through
the rather opaquo medium of his olll
cial commentary. If a singlo man con
templates so reckless n step as party
backsliding, or defection, lie of all tho
rest, is close behind him to mako him
quake in whatever clothes he happens
to have on !
Thus does the pnstma-ter practically
become the center of town patroiuigo
ami town consequence. All look up to
him, as they ilo to tho viUago ling-stall'
from which tho "stars nud stipe." are
in tho habit of waving.
Tho wynien either liko or dislike lilm
mi. inat very ucciucu.y. i" u
portion, howover, are careful to drop
l"'' lw,dl 1,10 I"''
ter'sfanilly.an.ls.) mako liifiultotroublo
When they trip across into tho oiilco,
they oxpect ujoko from him, rather ly
ly, ubout their distant correspondents,
which shows with what studious tho
roughness ho Informs himself, ami what
a memory, passing all wonuer, no lias.
Indeed, It affords him intense satisfac
tion to poke fun at tho girls about their
bei.uix, nud tcn-e them with intent to
draw forth still inure of their little lovo
, i'-i""-. .
V..,i, e..l,n1 tlnbeliii. n ( nils, lis! 1H4
. ' , ,,
. tummy mi-n uiiiiiiui-i.-u, iiuuiiuiiiii-
tee WHO liavo ngreeu upon uiu terms oi
union havo, It is said, among other
: in nir. nrescriiicu uiai nu ruiu mi inu
, cedent which does not stand npproved
bv both bodies shall bu of nny author!
ty until re-established in tho united
body, and that Judicatories, mim-"
uiul ticonlo of tho united Uiurui
guard against till needless olfen-Ivo nt
erencoto slavery. Tl,u- " r'""rJ .
- .1..., id, f.i r to end reii-
has existed for
MAY 31, 1867.
A SUBMARINE BOAT
WITH TUN M1JN O.V TUP. HOTTOM OP
After thoboinbardmcntof Valparaiso,
nnd while thoSpanlsh licet wnsntCnllno,
n German residing nt Valnpnrnlso eon
structedn submarine boat for the purpose
of applying torpedoes to tho bottom of
tho Spanish frigates, Tho boat was
forty feet long and was propelled by n
screw worked by hand. So conflde'iit
was her builder In her elllclcncy that nt
the first experiment In tho bay ho took
with himlnto tho boat his sonand eight
friends. After sailing about on tlio
surface a few moments, tho boat was
made to sink without the precaution to
hnvo tho cables attached for use in c.aso
of accident, or even n buoyto mnrk tho
spot whero sho went down. Several
hours elaped and tho boat failing to re
turn, tlio spectators crowded on tlio
niolo began to fear that all was not right
nnd ns tho day passed nwny, tho eon-
victlon became general that tho ndven-
turous party had gono to tho bottom.
Lato in tho afternoon tlio mail steamer
from Panama camo in and fired n gun
near tho spot where tlio boat disappear
ed. As thosmall boats were pnssingto nnd
from tlio steamer with passengers, etc.
bubbles whoro discovered rising upon
tlio surface of tho water where tlio
submarino boat was last seen ; nml as
they camo up at regular intervals in
small nuinbersit was supposed that tho
party was still alive, nml hearing the
steamer's gun, nnd knowing tlint n
grcnt ninny boats would bo going to nnd
fro, was signalling for help by ejecting
nir. A diver belonging to ono of tho
English men-of-war was nt onco sent
down, nnd after an hour's nnxious
waiting ho returned with tlio intelli
gence that tho boat was on the bottom
in 33 fathoms of water.
Chains and cables were immediately
attached to tho boat, and repeated ef
forts wcro made to raise her,but without
avail, her bottom seeming to havo been
sucked into tho oozy bed of tho s,cn and
bceomo firmly fastened. All night nnd
tlie next Hay, until afternoon, tho bub
bles kept coining up like signals, some
times not appearing for half an hour nt
n time, and then suddenly rushing up
for n few seconds with great force. Tlio
feelingof tho populace assembled to res
cue tho party from their terriblo fato
may bo imagined; but what must havo
been tho reflections of tlio men during
those awful hours at tho bottom of tho
bay, knowing, as they did, what littlo
hope there was for them.
They could have heard tho divers
working on tlio sides of their boat,
attaching tlio chains, and perhaps felt
tho strain as the cables drew taut; but as
timo sped away without their being
raised, despair worse than death must
have taken possession of them. Doubt
less they tried to signal through tho
sides of their boat to thediver hammer
Ulg outside, but ho in his diving dies
could hear nothing. Tho aperture to
tho interior was so small that but one
person could pass through it at n time.
and that very slowly, so that If an
attempt were mado to escape by that
means they would inevitably budrown
ed. After many hours or laborious ellbrts
to raise tho boat the hoisting machine
ry broke, and the attempt was necessa
rily abandoned. About the middle of
the afternoon of the second day tlio bub
bles commenced growing fainter nnd
moro rare, and before sundown entirely
ceased. Tho boat still lies whero it
went down, anil, passengers arriving by
the steamer are told by the boatmen, as
they row toward the shore, thoplaiuful
story of these ten men's fate, and of
tho females who still mourn in Valpa
raiso fur their fathers and brothers in
the iron coilln at the bottom of the sea.
A Sii.vsiiu.i: Acr. Tho following net
was pa-sed at tho last session of tho
Pennsylvania Legislature, permitting
disabled soldiers to peddle without
charge, by procuring n lleoiisu there for :
Si:c. 1 Ite it enacted by the Jfoitsc of
Hcprcxeiitaticcs in (lencra Amvmb))
tin t, ami it In hereby enacted by the
thorly of the game, that every honora
bly discharged soldier who is a resident
of this .State, nud who, from wounds, or
on nccount of disease contracted, while
in tlio military or naval service of tho'
United .States, and on account of such
disability is unablo to procure a liveli
hood by manual labor, shall have tlio
right to hawk, peddle nnd vend any
goods, wares, or merchandise within
this Commonwealth, by procuring a li
cense for that purpose, to bo issued
without cost : J'lucltled, That before
nny such soldier shall be entitled to the,
benefits of this net, he shall obtain n
certificate from an cxnmiuimr surireon
of tlio United States, that ho is unablo
to procure his living by manual labor,
nud shall also iirocuro u certificate from
tlie Prothonotary of any county In this
State, that ho has filed in tho oiilco of
said Prothonotary his ntlldavit, setting
forth that no is tno bona jiue owner, in
ills U II 11 lllll, I.I Ull I1IU huuu,'l
anil merchandise which ho proposes to
1.1.. ....... ..!, .1.1 ..I' .,11 (I... .-i.n.l ..piirna
hawk, pedtllo and voml, ana mat no
i, .til lint ,fv.ip in imtl till A.V111II flir till V
nlhoi- iiniMtm nr noCHnns whlllov'ti'l And
provided further. That die aforesaid
certificates, together with '"'!' Vm s
discharge, from tlio ml '?' f i e , i
an exemplified copy t hereof, slit ill I o
full nml Vnnchis vo evidence oi such
persou!s rigid to the benefits of this net.
oitiuiN oi' Lv.N.ii Law. -The. fol
lowing is extracted from thu council
litioks1itG.il.i-vy, I" Ireland:
".f.wues Lynch, Mayor of Galaxy, In
inw. Iittllt the choir of Mt. Nicholas
Church, nud hnnircd his own sou out of
his window, for killing and defrauding
strangers, without martial or common
law, to show a good cxumplu to posterity."
WIIAT IT WOULD DO.
is estimating tho good clfects which
would flow from tho abolition of the
retail liquor traffic In their respcctlvo
localities. If tho calculations wo havo
approximate anything like the truth, it
would certainly pay In allthocltles of
tho country to abolish the sale of rum
and lager. Taking tho basis of calcula
tions for other cities nnd towns, nnd nl
lowlug for n difference in population in
York, the following coino very nenr
tho results which we might reasonably
expect to follow tho restriction or tlio
abolition of tlio sale of Intoxicating li
quors In our midst :
1. It would turn fivo hundred oblo
bodied men chlelly young men who
oro debasing themselves by this low oc
cupation, to inoro honorable employ
ment, where their services would ntld
to tho solid wealth of the community.
2. It would redeem one thousand sots
from tho gutter, and set them to pro
3. It would savo ono thousand wo
men from tho miseries that spring from
drunkenness in husbands, sons nnd brothers.
I. It would secure clean faces nnd
decent clothes to two thousand children
who would bo taken out of vicious asso
ciations nnd sent to school.
0. It would annually savo tho lives
of n number of valuablo citizens from
death provoked by whisky.
0. It would savo a large sum annual
ly that is stolen under temptations im
posed by dissipation.
7. It would vastly diminish tho calls
8. It would greatly lesson tho ex
penso of our criminal nnd pollcoadmin
Istratiou. !). It would in nil respects iniprovo
tho morals oftho town, as wellas nlfor.l
greater security of life and property.
10. It would help all branches of busi-1
ness by increasing tlio resources of tho
people, nnd thereby the demand for tho
comforts of life.
11. It would add $500,000 annually to
tho wealth of our borough.
In short, it would do good to every
body and injure no one. Are not such
facts enough to mako all men and wo
men friends of temperance'.'" lie.
Tin: Last Man in tiii: li.umr.K
Shop. Wo havo seen many illustra
tions of misery, many that move tho
hardest heart to pity; but nothing can
bo more touching to an observer, noth
ing better defines misery, than n man
in n barber shop, with n dozen or so
ahead of him, waiting to bo shaved. It
is impossible for any one who never
has experienced it to know how much
nerve is required to pass successfully
through this ordeal. Different natures,
of course, experience different degrees
of misery ns they wait. "Tho poor but
virtuous young man, struggling with u
moustache" (tho fading lino of which
has brought him again to tho tonsorial
nrtlst), having' tin engagement with t0" intern-renco with his rites :
Susan who has told him, "anything "Wast your eyj, sir," said he, "nro
but n feller as isn't on timo" can prob-1 y or me bo-sin this ycr puke?"
ubly bo put down ns tho subject of most I AiiAPni'tn.and rnthergreeu young fel
nbject wretcheibiess nnd despair, as ho j lowinvitcdn younglady to atteuda ball
enters and looks around upon "less mis- j witli him ono night last summer. Tho
orables" who are "ahead" of him, tho Invitation was accepted and tho young
instoi wnom mingles Willi ins misery
n gnm satisfaction that some one comes
Tho young man would rather "dye"
at once than bo subjected to tho sus
pense ho must endure. Talk of ambi
tion; of fame, ns sho conies from nfar
to tho midnight porer over volumes i
iuie.i wun learning ami wisuom, or lo
tho warrior ns ho cuts his way with his
sword nnd wades through seas of blood
to the .shining goal ! Tho scholar's am
bition fades to insignificance, and the
soldier's dream of glory vanishes before
tlio mighty yearnings of tlie last man
in tho barbershop, waiting forhis turn.
No goal but the cushioned chair does
ho sec, "so near, and yet so far." j
There is music to him in the barber's
"next," as it les,ens tho distance, be-1
tween lilm and Ids ambitious goal ; and j
when it finally appeals to him, lie expo-
rlencesajoy that tho honied words of
flattery fail to bring to him who has I
found fame. Enforce tho Maine law,
prohibiting tilting hoops, make good
street crossings, etc., and wo will sub
mit, but deliver us, good Lord, from
being the last man In the barber's shop.
Goino Undi:u. Tho PottsvilloStnnd
ard of Saturday last relates tho follow
ing: "On Friday of last week nlnrgo board-Ing-liouso
at Mahanoy planes, bclong
itiL'lu the Huston nnd Mah.inoy Coal
Company, which was built overn mine,
suddenly sunk Into the earth to u depth
of seventy feet or more, by the caving
in of tlio run. of tl' "'I'10 below. Tho
occupant" ol "l0 house saw tho back
Tlio cavity left In tho earth Is thirty or I
forty yards in diameter. Tho roof of
tho houso has been reached by digging,
and three hundred dollars lu money
and some of tho furniture taken out
through a holu made fur the purpo.-e.
The building took flro from the upset
lug of a stove, and it was found neces
sary to turn on a sliiam of wnltr to
extinguish tho llaiui-s. Motnf the fur
niture is badly broken, and the house
1 said to be a complete wreck."
Saw a crazy woman, of a penurious,
stingy man, "do you set that man'.'
You could blow liis .-mil through n hum
ming bird's quill into a nitisqultoe's eye
and tho mosquito wouldn't wink."
1MU0E FIVE CENTS.
mt unrt gjumor.
GixntoKl., oni jourey to Hanover,
stopped in n vlllngo Jn Holland, nnd
While tho horses wcro getting ready, bo
asked for two ortltrco eggs, which were
brought him nnd chnrged two hundred
"How Isthls'."snidhlsiiinesty. Eggs
must bo senrco lu this place."
"Pardon," bald tlio host, "eggs oro
plenty enough, but kings nro scarce..'
Tlio king smiled, unit ordered tho
money to bo'paltl.
Ciii'.Kiu-'tn. Contkst. A few years
ngo, In a vlllago in Chester county, tho
Methodlslsnnd Presbyterians each built
n church nt nbout tho samo time. Soon
n rlvnlry nroso bctweonthom, especially
nmong tho Juvenile portion of tho con
gregations. On oncoccaslontho Metho
dist partygotthobestof nil argument in
"Ah I I guess we beat you now."
"Why we've got six buried in ourgrnvc
ynrd, and you've only four ; and there's
old Mr. Cooper iayoiiiy to d!ooo;i, nud
ho'll mako seven !"
Always in Skssion. Tliero was a
very Irrnsclblo old gentleman who for
merly held tho position of Justice of
tho Pcaco in ono of our cities. Going
down tlio main street ono day, ono of
tho boys spoko to him without coming
up to ids honor's idea of deference.
"Young man, I flno you fivo dollars for
contempt of Court." "Why, Judge,"
said tho offender, "you nro not in ses
sion." "This Court," responded tlio
Judge, thoroughly irritated, "is always
in session, and consequently always on
object of contempt I" There was dis
order in court ns his honor passed on.
Att Illustiiation. Tlio relation
which tho Southern Stntcsliold to tho
I Union is aptly 'illustrated by the folow-
In tho old Hush times, a passenger on
n river boat accosted a littlo negro boy
witli an inquiry usual to that day:
"Who do you belong to?"
"Don't know, sir," answered tho boy.
Why don't you know?"
"When I conio nboard lb 'longs to
Massa Sam White, but ho went mo hist
night on two littlo par, nnd do clerk of
dis boat win inc. Den Col. Smlff ho
beattloclerk onnbluir, an'iio had mc Inst,
so I carn't tell, sir, who I b'longs to till
do game close."
Tnniu: wuzo wunst n man who wuz
inebriated, and that he might present
himself inn stnta approximating sobrie
ty to tho partner uv his buzztim, lie
wuz cssayen to vomit, trying thus to
ease biz atomic uv tho cause uv tho un
pleasantnis therein, but hecoodentdoit.
Ho heaved and heaved, but there wuz
norezult. At this criticle period another
man approached, who remarked kindly
that, "if ho desired to vomit, his best
holt wood bo to run hlz fingers down
ills throat." Tho drunken individuooal
looked up indignant at this unwarraii-
couiilonimearedfat the ball. After danc-
ingfora time, "greeny" saw his partner
sitting in ono corner of the room all
alone. Now was his chance, so ho walked
up to where tlio lady was sittingand sat
down beside lu r. All well so far, but
tljo bashful fellow was at a loss for somo-
tiling to say. Ho fidgeted nbout con
sidernbly, and was sweating profusely.
Finally, taking hold of his wilted collar,
ho commenced tho conversation thus:
"It's powerful warm in tills room. My
shirt is till wet: ain't yours?" His part
ner blushed, said nothing, but look his
arm for tlio noxt dance.
Not Ennv Skanoiu, Tlio shtuighi
niscter is a gentile, and speaks in a for
rin tuug. llo is bilt on piles like a
Sandy Hill crane. If ho had pin bilt
witli 1 legs, 'he wild resemble the Per
uvian lama, llo is not a game anlmil,
but quite often cuius oil' sekund best in
n ruff nnd tumble lite: liko tho Injuns,
tha limit stand slvilization, and nro fast
disappearing. Tha roost on thogrouinl,
similar tew tho mud turklo. Tha oftin
go toslcephtnndlng,nndsiiui times pitch
over, nud when tha dew, tha enter the
ground Hko a pickaxe. Thnro food
consls ov Kom in me ear. ma crow
liko n Jackass, troubled with the
brouskecsiicks. Tha will eat as much
tuniistns a district skule master, nnd
glncrally sit down rite oph tew keep
from tipping over. Thn tiro dreadful
unhandy tew cook, you hav tn bile one
rend ov them fti a time yu kant git
them awl Into a jmta klttlotu oust. Tlio
frmall roster lays an eg asblgnkokenut,
and is sick for n week afterwards, nud
when sho hatches out a litter of yuug
sluinghls sho has tow brood them stand
ing, nnd then knnt klvorluit il ov them
tho rest stand around on tho outside,
like boys around aelrkus tent, gitting a
peep under tlio kauvas whenever tha
kan. The man who fust brought tlio
breed into this kuntry ought tew own
them all and be obliged tew feed them
on grasshoppers, caught bi hand. 1
never owned liutoneand ho got chunked
tu doth bi a kluU lu iieliitlie.- Hue, but
nut until he 1 tiid swalhivd IK feit ov ii.
Not enny shanghl for me, If you ple.e;
I wtild rather board a travelling kolpor
ter, anil as for eating one, give me a
blle.l owl r.irodim, or u ttli'kci'buznnl,
ronted hole, and stullcd with u palruv
Injun rubber boots, but not enny shanghl
for mo not a shanghl! Josh Jlltltnya,