The Columbian. (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, August 11, 1866, Image 1

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hc (Columbian,
k AN INDEPENDENT JOURNAL,
! M l'Uill.tSllEI) KVRHY S VrCIIIlAY. IM
Illiioiinljiirg, Columliln Count)-, I'n.
'rUUMM.
Two Dollars n ycnr, In lulvnucp. If not Imld lti
Vnlvnncc, Two Dollnrs nml Kirty Cents,
Address all Idlers (o
UKOHCIR II. MOOItK,
lMltur of tho Cot.fMiilAN,
Bloomnlmrg, Columliln County, l'n,
LAURA, MY DARLING,
BY EtIJICND Ct.ARENCr.STKIlMAf.
IiAt'liA, my darling, tho roso3 hnvo blushed
At tho Idss of tho dou", and our chamber Is
hushed ;
'Our murmuring Kibe to yir bosom Iins clunir.
And hours In his slumber the song thntyotmincj
i which you asleep, with your uniw round mm
thrown.
. Your links of dnrk tresses wound In with disown,
t wna mo wire is (is uenr us tus gontlo youtnr bride
"Of tho liour when you first, darling, camo to my
eldo.
1 Ynurn, my ilnrlliifr, our mil down tho stream
-'or Youlh'H sjumiiiursntid Winters Ims been llhon
dream;
Years havo but rounded your wonmnly craeo.
And lidded their (.pell lo tho llalit of your face;
Your soul Is tho siuno as though unit weiu tint
Blven
To tho two, llko yourself, sent to bless mo from
Ilea ven
Pear llfo, sprliiRlnii forth from the llfo of my life,
To draw yuuinnrotirnr.diirlliig, mother, mid wife.
I-nira, my darling, there's hazel-eyed Tied,
Asleep In his own tiny rot by tho bed.
And littlo King Arthur, whoso curls havo the art
Of winding their tendrils so closo round my heart
Yet fairer than cither, mid dealer than both,
Ih tlm trim nne who gave inn in girlhood her troth
J' or wo, when wo mated for evil nnd Rood
I What wero wc, darling, but babes in the wood?
Ijiura, my darllnpt, ttie years which havo flown
i Drought few of tho prizes I pledged to my ow j.
I said that no sorrow should roughen her way
Jlcrllfu should bo cloudless, n loujjKiiiiiinci'sday.
Window and sunshine, thistles nnd (lowers,
, Which of tho two, darllns, most havo been ours?
Yet lo-nlKht, by the smllo on your Hps, I can urn
You aro dreaming of mo, darling, dreaming of inc.
Ijillni, my darling, tho stars that wo knew
In our youth aro still shining as tender and true:
Tho midnight Is sounding Its slumberous bell,
And I como to the ono who has loved me so well,
Wake, darling, wake, fir my vigil is dunes
What shall dissever our lives which aro ono?
Hay, vhllo the rose listens under her breath,
"Naught until death, darling, naught until death!"
(Inlury.
A CONDENSED NOVEL.
JJY W-I.K-12 C-I.I.-NH.
PROLOGUE.
Tun following advertisement nppenr
ttl In tho Times of tho seventeenth of
June, 18 li:
WANTIII). A fuw young men for light gonteel
mploytuaiit.
AUdiess .1. W 1'. O.
In tho fame paper of same date, in
.another column :
TO I.l'.T. Thatcommodlous and elegant family
mansion No. 'Zi I.lmehouse Itoad, l'liltiioyvlllc,
will be lenletl low ton rcspfrtnhlc tenant if ap
plied tor Imincdl itcly, tho lamlly being about to
remo o to the Continent.
Under tholocul intelligence in another
column:
MISSINO. An unknown elderlv i-niitlciimn a
weekugo left Ills loilglugs In the Kent llnud, since
which nothing has been iieaiil of him. lie lctt no
iracBoi ins niciHiiy except a portmanteau con
taining ii couplo of shirts marked "Mi, ward."
To find the connection between tho
mysterious disappearance of the elderly
gentleman and thu anonymoti.s com
munication; tho relevancy of boththese
incidents to the letting of a commodious
family mansion ; and the dead secret in
volved in tho threo occurrences, is the
task of tho writer of this history.
A slim young man with spectacles, a
largo hat, drab gaiters, and note-hool;,
hat late that night with a copy of tho
Times before him, and it pencil which
ho rattled nervously between his teeth
in t lie coll'ee-room of the " Blue Dragon."
CHAPTER r.
MAKY JONI.s'S NAltltATIVi:.
I am tipper housemaid to tho family
that live at No. 27 hlmohoiise Hoad,
Fultnoy ville. I havo been requested by
Mr. Wilky Culling, which I takes the
liberty of here stating is a gentleman
born and bred, anil hits some consideru-
lion for the feelings of servants and is
oiot above rewarding them for their
trouble which is more than you can sty
; for M)mo who asks questions and get
short answers enough, gracious knows,
to tell what I know about them. 1 havo
lieen requested to tell my story in my
, own langwidge, though why, being no
schollnriniindcuniiotconceive. I think
, master is a brute. Do not know that
ho lias ever attempted to poison my
, missus which is too good for him, and
how she ever came to marry him, heart
only can tell but believe him to be
capable of any such hatroslty. Have
jl heard liim swear dreadful because of not
having ills shaving waterat nine o'clock
, precisely. Do not know whether he
ever forged a will or tried to get my
r missus's property although not having
9 tontitleneo in the man, should not be
Aburprlscd if lie had done so. Believe
jfcthut there was always something mys
terious in his conduct. Remember dis
tinctly how the family left homo to go
.abroad. "Was putting up my hack hair,
- Jast Saturday morning, when I heard a
ring, tjays cook, "That's missus's bell,
fcasnud mind you hurry or tho master 'ill
'know why." Says I, " 1 lumbly thank
ing you, mem, but taklngad vice of them
4is is competent to give it, I'll take my
,1'tlnie." Found missus dressing herself
will master growling as iwril. Says
'fte a,,'i'illsi(lue calm anil easy like, "Mary,
fll,vu ll)t'''n lo l,ael; to-day." " Wliat for,
Stiuciii," ays I taken aback. " WhatV
iliat liussy asklngV" says master from
i J the bed clothes qu!teavage like. " For
V'uo Continent Italy," says missus
-. -'"enn you go, MttryV" Her voico was
-quite geutlo and Ealntllke, but 1 knew
thohtrugglo it cost and says 1, " With
. !'", mem, to India's torrid clinic, if re
in 'quired, but witii African Gorillas," says
I, looking towards tho bed, " never."
'"heave tho room," says master, start
ling up and catching of ills bootjack.
" Why, Charles," says missus, " how
.you talk," ullectiug surprise. " Do go,
.Mary," says she, slipping a half-crown
, into my baud. I left the room scorning
.to tike notice of thu odious wretch's
conduct.
Cannot pay whether my mater and
.missus weroover legally married. "What
with tho dreadful stale of morals now-a-days
and them stories in tho circulating
libraries, innocent girls don't know
juto what society they might be obliged
VOL. I.-XO. IB.
to take situations. Never saw missus's
marring!) certificate, though 1 have quite
ticciiicntui-iiKo looked in her desk when
open, and would have seen it. Do not
know of any lovers missus might have
had. Delleve she had a likltn? for .1 nliti
Thomas, footman, for ho was always
spiieiui-in;e poor lady when we were
logeuicr uiougii there was nothing be
tween us, as Cook well knows, and dare
not deny, and missus needn't havo been
jeaious. mivo never seen arsenlu or
Prussian acid In any of tiie private
drawers but havo seen paregoric ami
camphor. Ono of my master's friends
was Count Moscow, a Russian papist
which i detested.
CHAPTER 11.
tiik
SUM YOL'XO MAN'S STOltY.
I AM by profession u reporter, and
writer for the press. I live at I'uitnev
ville. I have always had it passion for
the marvellous, nnd have been distin
guished for my facility in tracing out
mysteries and solving enigmatical oc
currences. On tho night of tho seven
teenth Juno, 18I.1, I left myolllce and
walked homeward. Thonightwasbright
and starlight. 1 was revolving In mv
mind tho words of a singular item Iliad
Just read in the Time. I had reached
the darkest portion of thu road, antl
loiiml myself mechanically repeating
" An elderly gentleman a week ago left
his lodgings on tho Kent Road," when
suddenly, I heard a step behind me.
I turned quickly, with an expression
of horror in my face, and by tho light
ol the newly risen moon beheld an
elderly gentleman, with green cotton
umbrella, approaching me. His hair,
which was snow-while, was parted over
a broad, open forehead. The expression
of his face, which was slightly llu.shed,
was that of amiability verging almost
uiioii imbecility. There was a strange,
Inquiring look about the widely-opened
mild blue eye a look that might have
been iuteiisilled to insanity, or modified
to idiocy. As lie passed me, lie paused
and partly turned his face, with a
gesture of inquiry. 1 see him still, his
white locks blowing in thu evening
breeze, his hat a little on the back of
ills head, and his figure painted in relief
against the dark blue sky.
Suddenly ho turned his mild eyo full
upon me. A weak, irresolute smile
played about his thin lips. In a voice
which bad something of thu tremulous
ness of ago anil tho self-salislled chuckle
of imbecility in it, lie asked, pointing
to the rising moon, "Why '.' Hii-lt !"
He had dodged behind me, appeared
to be looking anxiously down the road.
1 could feel his aged framoshaking with
terror as lie laid his (bin hands on my
shoulders and faced mo in the direction
of the supposed danger.
"Jiush! did you not hear them com
ing'."' 1 listened ; thcro was no sound but
the soughing of tho roadside trees in the
evening wind. I endeavored to reas
sure him, witlt such success that in a few
moments tho old weak smile appeared
on his benevolent face.
" Why V" Hut tho look of interro
gation was .succeeded by a hopeless
blankness.
" Why !" I repeated with assuring ac
cents.
Why," ho said, a gleam of intelli
gence suddenly Dickering over his face,
"is yonder moon, as she sails in tho
blue empyrean, casting n Dood of light
over hill and dale, like Why," ho re
peated, with a feeble smile, " is yonder
moon, as sho sails in thu blue empy
rean" He hesitated stammered and
gazed at nio hopelessly, with tearsdrip-
ping from his moist and widely opened
eyes.
1 took his hand kindly in my own.
" Casting a shadow o'er hill anil dale,"
I repeated quietly, leading him up the
subject, "like Come, now."
"Ah!" he said, pressing my hand
tremulously, "you know it V"
" 1 do. Why is it like the eh tho
commodious mansion on the I.lmehouse
Road V"
A blank staro only followed, lie
shook his head sadly.
" Like tho young men wanted for a
light, genteel employment V"
Ho wagged his feeble old head cun
ningly. "Or, Mr. Ward," I said with bold
conlldence, " llko the mysterious disap
pearance from the Kent itoad."
The moment wits full ofstispeiise. Ho
did not seem tu hear me. Stiildenlv he
turned.
"Ha!"
I darted forward. Hut he had vanish
ed in the darkness.
CIIAl'TKR III.
no. 7 i.iMmuusi: uo.n.
It was a hot midsummer evening.
I.iinchuiise Itoad was deserted savo by
dust and a few rattling butchers' carts,
and tho bell of the muDln antl crumpet
man, A commodious mansion which
-tood on tlio right of the road as you
enter l'ultneyvlllosuiTounded by stately
poplars and a high fence surmounted
by a checaur le J'rlne of broken glass,
looked to the passing anil footsoi o pedes
trian llko the genius of seclusion ami
solitude. A bill announcing in the
usual terms that tho house was to let
hung from tho bell at tho servants' en
trance. As tho shades of evening closed, and
the long shadows of tho poplars stretch
ed across thu road, a man carrying a
sinnll kettle slopped and gazed, tlrst at
the bill mid then at tho house. When
ho had reached tho corner of tho fence,
lieugnii) stopped mill looked cautiously
BL00MSBU11G, SATURDAY, AUGUST 11, J8GG.
Up and down tho road. Apparently
satisfied with tho result of his scrutiny,
lie deliberately sat himself down In thu
dark shadow of tho fence, antl nt once
busied hlinelf In .some employment, so
well concealed as to be Invisible to the
gaze of passers-by. At the end of an
hour ho retired cautiously.
Hut not altogether flnsocn. A slim
young man, with the spectacles and
note-hook, stepped from behind it tree
as thu retreating ilguro of thelntnider
was lost In the twilight, and transferred
from the fence to ills note-book tho
freshly stencilled inscription : " S T
1S00 X."
CIIAl'TKR IV.
COt'NT MOSCOW'S NAltltATIVi:
I am a foreigner. Observe I To be a
foreigner in Kngland is to be mysterious,
Fiispicioiw, Intriguing. M. Collins has re
quested tho history of my complicity
with certain occurrences. It Is nothing
hah absolutely nothing.
1 writo with ease and fluency. Why
.., I.I T L ,. . , . -
siiimio j not write v Train la I l am
what you Knglish call corpulent. Ha,
ha! lama pupil or Maeehiavelli. I
Dud it much butter to disbelieve every
thing, antl to approach my subject and
wishes clrcuitoiisly than in it direct
manner. You have observed that play;
nil animal, the cat. Call it, and it does'
not come to you directly, but rubs itself
against till the furniture in the room,
ami readies you finally and scratches
Ah, ha! scratches! I am of tho feline
species. People call me a villain bah !
I know the family living No. 27
Linichmt'-o Road. I respect thu gen
tleman a line, burly specimen of your
Englishman nnd niadame, charming,
ravishing, delightful. When it became
known to mo that they designed to let
their delightful residence, and visit
foreign shores, I at once called upon
them. I kissed thu hand of mad
ame. 1 embraced tho great English
man. Madamu blushed slightlv. The
great Englishman shook my hand liko
a mastilV.
I begun in that dexterous, insinuating
manner of which I am truly proud. 1
thought madamu was 111. Ah no. A
change, then, was all that was required.
I sat down at the piano and sang. In a
few minutes madamo retired. I was
alone with my friend.
Seizing his hand, I began with everv
demonstration of courteous sympathy.
I do not repeat my words, for my in-
tention was conveyed more in accent,
emphasis, and manner than speech. 1
hinted to him that he had another wife
living. I suggested that this was bal
ancedha! by his wife's lover. That,
jKK-ibly, he wished to Dy liencu the
letting of his delightful mansion. That
he regularly and systematically beat his
wife in the English manner, and that
she repeatedly deceived him. 1 talked
of hope, of consolation, of remedy. I
carelessly produced a bottle of strycli
nine and a small vial of stramonium
from my pocket, and enlarged on the
elliciency of drugs. His face, which
had gradually become convulsed, suit
denly became fixed with a frightful ex
prcssion. lie started to his feet, and
roared : " ou d d Frenchman !"
1 instantly changed my tactics, and
endeavored lo embrace him. He kick
ed mo twice, violently. 1 begged per
mission to kis madaine's hand. He
replied by throwing me down stairs.
1 am in bed with my head bound up,
and beefsteaks upon my eyes, but still
confident and buoyant. I have not lost
faith in Maeehiavelli.
they sing in the opera
body's hands.
Tra, la, la! as
I kiss evcry-
CHAPTER V.
int. niiios's htati:mi:nt.
My name is David Diggs. I am a sur
geon living at No. !) Tottenham Court.
On tho llftoenth of June, IS") I, I was
called to bee an elderly gentleman lodg
ing on the Kent Road. Found him
highly excited, with strong febrile
yniptoius, pulso ono hundred and
twenty, increasing. Repeated Incoher
ently what I Judged to be the popular
form of a conundrum. On closer ex
amination found acute hydrocephalus
and both lobes of tho brain rapidly fill
ing with water. In consultation with
J. .1 .,.l..,t.l. tl ... . il ..
an eminent phrenologist, it was further
discovered that all the organs were
nioro or less obliterated except that of
Comparison. Hence thu patient was
enabled to only distinguish tho most
common points of resemblance between
objects, without drawing upon other
faculties such as Ideality or Language
for assistance, hater In tho day found
him sinking being evidently unable
to carry thu most ordinary conundrum
to a successful Issue. Exhibited Tinct.
Val., Ext. Opii., nml Camphor, nnd pre
scribed quiet and emollients, Ou the
seventeenth tho patient was missing.
CHAPTER LAST.
htati:mi:xt or Tin: rt-'iii.isiir.it.
fi tho eighteenth of June, Mr. Wllkio
Collins left a roll of manuscript with its
for publication, without title or direc
tion, since which time he lias not been
heard from. In splto of tho care of the
proof-readers, and valuable literary
issl-tnnce, it is feared that tho conti
nuity of the story has been destroyed by
some accidental misplacing of chapters
during its process. How and what
chapters are so misplaced, the publisher
leaves to an indulgent public to dis
cover.
A Tr.Avr.i.i.r.n wishes to know what
eiise there is Just now in tho term
" Railroad Securities," seeing there is
uo security on any of the railroads.
HATS AND BONNETS.
It has sometimes happened that gen
ius, by a phrase only meant for poetry,
makes a prophecy, and In tills way gun
powder, the steain-englne, and the mar
iner's compass are said to have been an
ticlpated. Tlmoworks the miracle, nml
causes the event to correspond with tho
guess. Even now there is n certain hy
perbole becoming a fact. Did tho ladv
who first called her bonnet "a duck"
ever imagine that u season would tip
proach when milliners would go us near
a duck us posslblo when composing a
head-gear? Far bo it from us to question
any tK ' o tho tnsto of the sex olfers for
our iratlon. ,Wo can only stand by
and wonder. In tlieso bonnets nre re
vealed to us the strango mystery of tho
female notion of attire. Here they have
full swing. In dress thu fall has neces
sltated u few restraints which, however
irksome, must bo borne, but touching
bonnets nothing is imposed. And so
their variety is infinite, and their name
legion. We turn back to tlto portraits
of our great-grandmothers, or to their
fashion-books, and find that a "coal
scuttle" was tlto rage. Historians nnd
essayists, who will describu for you the
private views of Cornelius a Lapide, or
Juliti3U;icsar,1might find It diflicult to
accwnirhmiitrinionial success of
uiosogreai-grauumoiners ; ior, reading
bVourllghl, aintwo comprehend a man
falling In love with a woman whoso ap
pearance waa ridiculously suggestive of
W allsend? Of course our ago has im
proved In this respect, nnd when Le,
J-oltH for June, 1800, is disinterred by n
curious twentieth-century writer, ho will
find therein u legacy of designs worthy
of us.
We would not be taken in with " coal
scuttles." Wo llko Dowers growing nat
urally from the human hair, or a small
platter of straw laid on the summit of
the head. An inverted soup-plato is
considered a graceful coiffure, and a lace-
rininied oystor-holl is worn as a sweet
tiling. We have, to quote Ias J'otht,
tho " Trouville," the "Biarritz," the
" Clansse," and thu " Mandarin." You
wear a "green butterfly with silver
wings" on your Mandarin. It is neces
sary this butterily should begreon. The
" Clarrissu" lias a scarf of gauze round
the crown, fastened under a large ro
sette of gauze trimmed with feathers
from the throat of the peacock. See
how particular wo are as to detail., til
mot us much so as tho German drama
tist who noted In his play, " Hero is to
heard the sound of ami coat brushing."
Anglers nre not more precise in their
hackles than ladies in the ornaments of
the bonnet. A few weeks since Mr.
1'upper warned us of a robin-famine, in
consequence of the red-breast being sac
rificed at tho shrine of fashion.
hast year sea-gulls were in danger of
extermination, to judge by tho run upon
their wings. Xo lady's hat was perfect
without a wing, and wo believe it was
tills poor fowl that furnished tho deco
ration. Can it.be that the custom is just
a relic of tho savage state, and owes its
origin to an idea connected with that
which induces the dandies of thu Feejeo
Islands to wear trinkets of sharks' teeth
and thu tibias of departed relatives,
while the ladies of tho stutio district
cover their heads with feathers, after
first steeping them in grease? We dress
our feathers; they have them aunuturcl.
Hut have they anything resembling
the"Turto" or tho "Fiinchoii?" Tho
"Tartu" is a real love, not bigger than
a saucer, and constructed identically of
tho same shape as that useful article.
" ha Tarto" is much sought after. It
serves no vulgar purpose, though, such
as protecting the head. Wreaths of tiny
bIoonis garnish " ha Tarto," and long,
Doating strings depend from It. The
hair must bo carefully got up to set oil"
" La Turte." A recent traveller men
tions a tribe in which tiie chiefs twisted
their hair into helmets, anil, if we ad
vance as wo are, there is nothing to pre
vent thu ladies from twisting tho hair
into bonnets. Thu chignon is a step in
that direction, tho first Darwinian de
velopment. This fashion would havo
thu merit of economy, hair being more
lasting than straw or tulle.
At present tho bonnet is not a bonnet.
JUoiir years ago it commenced to illniln-
fl I it... I .1 .. ..It I 11.. 1 11 !....
Islt the sides disappeared Drst, then the
front; hist year thu luck went, and
now tlto top is about to depart. Wostis
poet tho "Mandarin" is thu last wo shall
see of it ; and what a change from the
straw tunnel in which a lady's fai ounce
resided to tho paltry thatch from under
which it now smiles at us! One was a
substantial house, tho other a mere cot
tage ornce. There Is a singular circum
stance to bo remarked hero, flow gen
eral the quantity of hair is, how perfect
tiie plaiting, and how universally the
ladles tiro able to meet tho exigencies of
a custom which would appear to ho
nioro or less dependent on natural ad
vantages. They seem never short of
hair, to use a common phrase. They
can even have it what colur tliuy wish,
and Mr, 'flipper's robins were unfortu-
nato in possessing waistcoats which
matched thu prevailing hue. Tho bon
nets play but a secondary part after till.
Tho " Mandarin" only presides over a
chignon. A kind of poultice or bande
let to of lace, us wo should write, Just
protects this sacred bump. Unfeeling
persons suspect the bump to bo st titled
with cotton. At thu bottom of it we
havo seen fruit sprouting. It istltosub-
stlluto for the poll of the bonnet, and is
Grecian. The ladies aro assured that
tho chignon is of classic origin, and
taking this notion into their heuds, they
cannot have enough of it. How can wo
charge tlnm with frivolity or c.ipnco in
dress, when they go for n fashion to the
Immortal statues of old Athens? Cer
ttilnly thu statues had their heads neatly
dressed, and considering that tho sculp
tor .seldom embarmssciltho rust of thu
figure with any superfluous draping, It
Is to bo assumed lie did his best with
the hair. If this classic principle is car
ried out, we may find It open to a few
objections. Say thatthebonnets vanish,
that tho Mandarin and ills family are
discarded, what next, and next?' The
coal-scuttle, wo understand, was in
vogue when blushing was known, but
that art or infirmity being now obsolete,
or being rendered it permanent attrac
tion, wo dispense with the coal-scuttle.
To do things altogether as they did In
Oreeco would scarcely suit. We confess
we do not witness the complete extinc
tion of thu bonnet without a misgiving
and a regret. " La Tartu" does not con
sole us, and the " Mandarin" istiniiieill
cient substitute. It will takosomu time
beforowoaro reconciled to " Le Caprice."
Xot that we are heretical enough to
question tho propriety of even a " Man
darin." In those matters, as wo said
before, tho ladles should have absolute
authority and control. Only we should
warn them not to bo surprised at the re
marks which the innovations glvo oc
casion to. In the commencement of
this season the sex took to what, for
want of a better name, we shall term
zebra dresses. We beheld our wives
and daughters covered with stripes, and
streaked down even as the wild asses of
the desert. Xow wo havo grown accus
tomed to their streakiness. So we may
yet bu charmed with tho " Lainballu"
or with thu "Trouville," "having the
borders raised at thu sidu edged with
velvet, worked with beads or straw,
and trimmed with feathers." Tho black
box which is worn on the head wherev
er tho English language is spoken, alio ws
How stupid gentlemen are at inventing
a lint. Tho conservative protection which
keeps up tho hideous gear indicates
how we should encourage a spirit of in
geiiuity among ladles, who might other
wise relapse in tho dismal sameness from
which we sufl'er. Hutorcspectfiiily,
with deference, nnd merely as outsiders,
would proffer a word for the bonnet
proper. Is our climate as dry and
warm as that of Paris ? Are wo as suc
cessful iudre.ing up to thu " Lamballe,"
in harmonizing cloak, mantle, shawl, or
whatever it may be, to the pitch of the
hair, as tlto French? These bo grave
considerations. Shall it bo the bonnet
or "Clarissu?" It strikes our uuin
structed minds as n misnomer to call a
basin of crape a bonnet, and yet it is a
bonnet according to 7e JolM, and be
longs to tho genus " Fanchou."
Tho iiats aro to the bonnets as a croco
dile to an alligator, or as the proverbial
negro named alter tho Roman Emperor
to thu other negro. We have mention
ed them indi-criininately. Roth are
gauzy and Doral. Fashion, however,
should not iniila:e lleliogabulus, ami
require peacocks, red-breasts, and king
fishers to grace herd.iinty dishes. Who
sutlers for the llower.s wo need not de
tail ; the manufacture of artificial flow
ers Is not a pleasant subject, but a lady
will havo them all the samo. Ono con
sequence of the modo is, that bonnets
have to be renewed almost as often as
gloves. That fact, however, suggests
a reflection so obviously mean and un
worthy that we shall not dwell upon
it; wo should not complain of what
gives us an opportunity of repeating tho
chicfest privilege of a British father.
Paying for a bonnet should bo a pleas
ure, and wo havo no doubt it is; wo
trust, though, that the "Mandarin" the
"Lamballe," and " La Turte" aro only
temporary, and that a bonnet will not
bccouio so diniinutiveus to puzzle a very
Owen of millinery, who might he asked
to construct one from a future " Fan
chou."
A SAGACIOUS DOG.
A Pahis correspondent of tho London
SlwulurU gives tho following anecdote
of Hrusca, a dog which lias acquired a
notoriety in the Court of thu Tullerles :
You havo doubtless read thu amusing
and witty letter written by Marshal
Vaillant In defence of tho canine law.
Thu Marshal is very fond of dogs, and
ho is the happy possessor of one whose
intelligence many men would bu happy
to share. I alltido to Hrtisco, the inti
mate friend of Nero, thu Emperor's
own dog. Le jS'ortl gives some lirterest-
ing details of tho littlo animal-whoso
portrait by Jartlin attracted so much
attention at thu last year's exhibition.
Hrusca was found on thu field of battle
at Solferino. His master, an Austrian
olllcer, had been killed that day, and the
poor dog was found howling by the side
of his dead body. Some French soldiers,
touched by thu sight of ills evident
grief, carried him away in their arms,
anil brought hlni to tho major-general
ofthonrniy.Marshul Vaillant. The Mar
shal accepted tho gift, mid brought him
with him to Paris. At Ilist Hrusca, hav
ing been educated in Germany, hail
great dltllculty iu understanding French;
indeed, unless ho was spoken to iu Ger
man, lio walked off and turned his tall
to the speaker with an air of utter dis
gust. However, ho has now acquired
tho language, and were ten Austrian
re;lments between him and his present
in ister, all their Teutonic sounds would
not prevent his reaching thu Marshal.
Whenever hu goes to Court, Hrusca goes
likewise; whether tho Emperor himself
be iu ids way or not is nothing to him ;
Hrusca would quietly walk over thu im
perial boots to secure a snug sent near
thoMurshal. iiouttends Cabinet Coun
cils with the uuuit I'gul.ii iiy. This
PHIOK FIVE CENTU
Winter .;Hrusc.a was Immensely bored
by thejjcngtli of tho discussion, nnd
sncezed'ond coughed as usual when lie
considersHhat tho Council has sat long
enough ; but on thisspeclal occasion his
Impatlenco roso to a loud whine, which,
producing no effect upon tho Ministers,
ho walked straight up to tho Kmperor
and scratched his trowsers. Ills Majes
ty, annoyed nt being Interrupted, push
ed thu dog nway, and said : " J&t-tlbete,
ce, ehienl" " Ileof" said the Marshal,
indignantly ; " no, Sire, he is not stupid
you shall see." Tho Minister rose,
look a nuwspaper off tho table, and go
ing to tho far end of tho Council Cham
her, salil: "Hrusca, take that to the
Emperor." Kaeh of tiio Ministers, a
he passed them with tho paper in his
mouth, tried to get it from liiuHliVrusca
would not let it go, and carrleillTt safely
to ills Majesty. From that time to this
Hrusca hits ills entree at all Cabinet Coun
cils. Ho.keeps himself beautifully clean
and when his paws aro muddy ho carries
a brush, left forliisspeclal use in one spot,
to one of tho Marshal's servants, nnd
narus at him until he brushes off every
particle of dust.
MARSIIAEKBENEDEK,
A wuituu III Lc Xbrd gives a long
sketch of Marshal Benedok's career, but
wo confine our extract to tho portion re
lating to his present command: It mav
be said that he was nominated to the
head of thu'iirmy by acclamation; his
appointment was, in fact, imposed ou
the Government by public opinion.
The Marshal bears the most popular
name in Austria ; and lie has gained that
popularity less by his strategical talents
than ids adventurous bravery. Hither
to lie has only been a brilliant general
of the advance guard ; it remains to be
seen whether, In a new post, ho will
display the qualities required by thu
chief command of a great army in the
face of the enemy. He is about sixty
two years old, but looks younger. At a
sitting of tho Rciclisrath 1 examined
him at leisure with a good glass. His
countenance is one of those which aro
never forgotten. Two tilings iu it strike
you particularly the eye and tho mous
tache. The look is that of command ;
under thick lashes sparkle two black
eyes full of vivacity. He would bo no
soldier were he not to attend carefully
to Ids moustache; ho wears it waxed in
the Hungarian fashion and hooked at
the ends. His face, embrowned by the
Italian sun, lias become longer than it
was; thin whiskers, turning to gray,
form a sort of frame, and an acquilino
noso imparts to ids features a character
of great vigor. The Marshal is rather
short than tall, and rather thin than
stout. For a man of his ago thcro is a
wonderful suppleness in his movements,
which are rapid and full of vigor. Tho
cmemlih: of his person is not exactly se
ducing for those who aro not partial to
the military carriage; but he commands,
if not sympathy, at least attention. He
sides, to bo correctly estimated, he
should be seen iu a picture with an
other background not the benches of u
Parliamentary assembly but on horse
back, and lu the midst of the smoke of
battles.
TDIE HEALTH OF AMERICAN
WOMEN.
Tin: Cincinnati Times lias recently
compiled some curious statistics con
cerning the health of American women
between twenty and forty years of ago.
A table is given, founded upon the re
turns of burials of males and females
between these ages in forty-live ceme
teries situated inOhio,Illlnois, and Mich
igan, the places of burial having been
selected with due regard to their repre
sentative character. Tho figures from
this table are: Males, eight hundred
and six ; of females, twelvo hundred
anil eighty nine, showing that, at least
in the West, flfty per cent, nioro women
than men diu between tho ages of twen
ty and forty. Tho Times makes still
further deductions, as follows:
J'iivt. That in the oldest yards of tho
country, iu which tliollrstsettlers buried
their dead, the number of tho sexes
who died between twenty and forty
years of age was thu most nearly equal,
In many eases tho males outnumbering
the females, while in thu new yards tit
tho same places the females greatly out
number the males.
iSccond. That in private or select
yards, where the upper classes bury ex
clusively, tlto female dead during tills
period of life is greatly in excess of tho
males.
Third, That In yards whero tho for
eigners chiefly bury their dead tho males
usually exceed the females between
those ages.
DISCOVERY OF COAL IN PENN
SYLVANIA. A WitiTiHt ill tho New York Obereer
asserts that Col. Georgo Shoemaker, a
gentleman of Teutonic origin, was tho
discoverer of Pennsylvania coal. Ho
lived on tho Schuylkill and owned ex
tensive tracts. The writer goes on lo
say :
" It chanced one day that In construct
ing a limekiln ho Used some of the Mack
stones that wero lying about the place.
Mine Out! mine Out! dire Monet pe
idl nn Jlre ." exclaimed thu astonished
Dutchman, when tho rich glow of tho
ignited anthracite met his gaze. The
neighbors, who, of course, were fuw and
far between, wereafter much ntlo assem
bled to witness tho marvel. This hap
pened in lbl'-'. Shortly after, mine host
loaded it Pennsylvania team with the
bhwh ftunes, and Journeyed slowly tp
Phll.Kli'lphi i, .uli-t - nt-'of iilnrty-thriVupjn th"'r comlift ynj can.
STmnn iif gulicrli.iin0t
One M)nrtrt', 0)c nHhrco lncrilohs V M
IVch subsequent Insertion lesn than thlitecn.
Oilo Hqnaro one mouth 5 M
Two " ' s trt
Throo " " f, l)
Pour " ' " , n it)
Half column " 10 (O
Ono cnlmnn " l'it0
Kf cntof nnd Administrator's Notices .. .1 ()
AudltofiTKoticc a CO
IMIto'rlal Notices twenty cents' per llnog
bllier ndvrrtlsctnenU lhscitcd nccordlng to sj fe
cial Voiltraet.
miles. There unforeseen dlfllcultics wero
presented. The grates anil s.toVfp then
in uso wero not constructed "to facilitate
tho combustion of tin tliHicHo,rin'diburn
it would not ! After many Ineffectual
efforts, to ignite thu product, It W113
thrown asldo as worthless, and our dis
comfited German, who had beguiled his
tollsonio way to tho metropolis: with
dreams of ingots, returned to digest lite
disappointment In his mountain soli
tude."
BEAOli-MARKS IN FRANCE.
An' important work Is now In progresi
in France, viz., tho 10-clHngnnd estab
lishing of beach-marks throughout tho
country. The object of tills undertaking
is to furnish a series of levels thfit will
ontiblo tho course of canals, railways, '
etc., systems of drainage- and Irrigation
and other public nnd private- works, to
bo laid down on tho map and marked,
out on tho ground witliout error. Tho '
operating wero begun in, 1857, under
tho control of the Minister of Publlo
Works, nnd will be terminated in five or
six years hence. Tho work has been
since tho beginning under tho superln
tendenco of 'it. Bourdalone, civil cngi
ueer, to whom is duo tho series of levels
taken from tho Isthmus of Suez from
tho Mediterranean to the Red Sea; Tho
datum lino of the levels in Francois tho
usual sea level ; the beach-marks estab
lished on the ground consist of cones of
cast iron, set in masonry on tho sppt
whero tho levels aro required to bonotcdv
and a great number of these havo been
placed in lines of level which touch'scai
port towns, groups of rivers and caiials
llnesor railway, roads, etc. Moro than
eighteen tlioiisaudlinear miles liavo been
thus laid down as base-lines ; but, in
order to complete tho work, the opera
tions nitif.t bo extended to ono hundred
nnd twi nty thousand miles, a length
e.'iu.d to five times tho circumference of
tho earth, and more than half of our dis
tance from tho moon. Tills gigantic
undertaking is very costly, but, when
onc6 completed, it will enable every
engineer or contractor, who may wish to
"attach a series of levels in any part of
Franco with tito-o of the remotest dis
tricts, to do this by tho aid of a beach
mark on the spot, or near nt hand, for
the maximum space between tho levels
is to bo only three quarters of n mile.
The accuracy of these levels is such that
they aro true to threo centimetres, or
half inch for the whole length through
out France.
THE ART OF DUNNING.
Tin: art of dunning is not reckoned
among tho fine or polite nrts. Indeed,
there arc no rules on this subject, as
each case must bo tried by itself, tho
success of various expedients being very
much "as you light upon chaps." At
times, a lucky accident brings tho
money out of a slow debtor, after tliO
manner following:
One of our merchants, nervous and
irritable, received a letter from a cus
tomer iu tho country, begging for moro
time. Turning to one of his counting-
clerks, he says't
" Writo to this man immediately."
" Yes, sir. What shall I say ?"
The merchant was pacing tho office.
and repeated tho onion
" Writo to him at once."
"Certainly, sir; and what do you
wish me to say '."'
Tho merchant was impatient, anil
broke out :
"Something or nothing, and that
very quick."
Tiie clerk Waited for no further orders,
but consultinghisowii judgment, wrote
and dispatched tho letter. By tho re
turn of mail came a letter from the do
lluqueut customer, inclosing the money
in full of the account. The merchant's
eyes glistened when lie opened it ; aud
hastening to his desk, ho said to tho
clerk :
" What sort of a letter did you writo
to tltis man? Here is tho money in
full."
" I wrote just what you told nio to,
sir. The Mtcr is copied into the book."
The letter-book was consulted, and
there it stood, short and sweet, and
right to the point :
" DiiAit Sin, Something or nothing !
and that very quick. Yours, &c,
And this letter brought tho money,
when a mora elaborate dr n would havo
failed of the happy effect.
nOW TO BECOME UNHAPPY.
In the Drst place, if you want to bo
niUernblc, be selfish. Think all tho
time of yourself antl of your own tilings.
Don't care about anybody else. Havo
no feeling for any ono but yourself.
Never think of enjoying thosntlsfaction
of seeing others happy, but rather if you
seo n smiling face be Jealous, lest another
should enjoy what you have not. Envy
all who are better off in any respect
than yourself; think unkindly toward
tlieni. Bo constantly afraid lest somo
should encroach upon your rights ; bu
watchful against it, und if any one comes
near you, snap at him like a mud dog.
Contend earnestly for everything that
Is your own, though it lie not worth a
plu ; for your " rights" nre Just as much
concerned as if It were a pound of gold.
Never yield a point. Be very sensitive,
and take everything that Is said to you
In playfulness in the most serious man
ner. Be Jealous of your friends, lest
they should not think enough of you ;
and if at any time they should seem to
ueglect you, put the worst eoustructlo-
v