————i irn r,, ...i MI mil) HI, ..... i i 11 ■_ mi 1 ... ' BY DAVID OVER. iq. L M FORGIY£ A3ID BE FORGIVES." Br L. AtiacsTpa JONES. Brother traveler through this life, Where misfortunes oft assail, Battle nobly 'mid the strife, Boldly face the fiercest gale ; Some may fail where you succeed ; Some who manfully have striven ; Keep this motto in your creed, Oil, '•forgive and be forgiven." If sneering foes dispute thy way, With a smile still pass them by ; ilecd not what their tongues may say, Toiler let thy aim be high : When you reach Fame's highest goal, For which you manfully have striven ; All your foes with feeling soul, Oh, 'forgive and be forgiven." Ever trust in God above; Though misfortune bear thee down ; Changeless is thy Maker's love, Smiles he hides behind each frown ; Then when on your couch of death, Life's last ties are sadly riven ; With ihy last expiring breath, Ob, "/orgtve and be forgiven." JI 111 LEE AnPRIMFIELD. Speeches of Mr. Lincoln and Senator Trumbull. Springfield, Nov. 21. —Our city was • soene of gaiety and festive joy last night such as ha* never before been witnessed here. The occasion was a grand turn out of the friends of Mr. Lincoln, in honor of the manifestation of respect and confidence evinced the peo ple of Illinois in their votes for Lincoln, Ham lin and the conservative views of the Republi can party. Although the celebration was intended to be strictly locai, people from the neigboring country poured in in all sorts of conveyances during the whole day The city was splendid ly illuminated iu the evening, mostly with Chi nese lanterns. The State House, a large square building, in the centra of a square iu the middle of the city, presented tho appear ance of four walls of fire. The Wide Awake torchlight procession was quite large. It bait ad in front of Mr. Lincoln's home, and cheer ed for Mr. Lincolo until be appeared and spoke as follows: SPEECH OF MR. LINCOLN. Friends and Fellow Citizens—Please ex cuse me on this occasion from making a speech, i thank you, in common with all those who have thought fit by tbeir votes to endorse the Republican cause. [Applause.] 1 rejoice with you in the success which has so far at tended that cause. [Applause.] l'et in all our rejoicings let us neither express nor cher ish any hard feelings towards any citizen who oy his vote has differed with us. [Loud cheer ing.] Let us at all times letnember that all American citizens are brothers of a common country, and should dwell together in the bonds of fraternal feeling. [lmmense ap plause.] Let me again beg you to accept my thanks, and to excuse me from further speak* tog at this time. The speech called forth the most unbounded enthusiasm, and numerous cries of go 'Go on,' •That's right,' &c. At the conclusion cheers were giveD for Mr. Lincoln, Mrs. Linooln, Governor Yates, &o. The crowd then ad journed to the Wigwam. The Wigwam was thronged the whole eve ning. After the procession terminated its march, speeches were made by R. Yates, Gov ernor elect, Senator Trumbull and others. Mr. Trumbull's speech, in view of his high position, and well known relations to the Pre sident elect, is taken as a reflex of the views of Mr. Liucolu- Hence it is the more im portant. The immense applause with whioh Mr. Trumbull *a received having subsided, he said: SPEECH OF SENATOR TRUMBCLL. It is meet that Republicans should make tuerry aud be glad, for the spirit of liberty, which with our rulers was dead, is alive agaio, aud the constitution ordained to secure its blessings, which was loet sight of, is found.— Mr. Trutubuli then congratulated the Republi cans of Illinois on tbeir having not only ele vated one of their citizens to tho Presidency, but also elected au entire State government, and secured thereby a United States Senator. Upon national topics Senator Trumbull dis countenanced the idea cf triumphing over po litical opponents, accepting all, by whatever uaute called, as brethren of a common oouutry. lie ssiJ Mr. Lincoln, although the candidate of t ■>e Republican patty, as Chief Magistrate will neither belong to that or any oher party wneu inaugurated. He will be the President of the country, aud of the whole oouutry, und I doubt not will be as ready to defend and pro loci the State in which he has not leceived a solitary vote, against any eneroaohment upon its constitutional rights, as the one iu whioh he has received vhe largest majority. While they by whose votes ho has been designated as Lbief Magistrate of the people will expect him A Weekly Paper, Devoted to Literature, Politics, the Arts, Sciences, Agriculture, &c., &c —Terms: One Dollar and Fifty Cents in Advance. to maintain and carry forward the principles on whioh he was elected, they kaow that in do ing so no encroachments will Be made on the reserved rights of any rf the States. They know that the Federal Government is one of delegated powers; that it can do nothing uu lesa the authority for the act can be found in the instrumeut which created it; that all pow ers which are not conferred are reserved to the States cr the people of the S ; atos. Hence when ihcir political opponeuts have charged them with abolitionism, or attributed to them a desire to interfere with slavery iu the States, or some fanatic has insisted they ought to do so, the reply has invariably been that the peo ple, who made the Federal Government, did not think proper to confer it ou such authority: and it has, therefore, no more right to meddle with slavery in a State than it has with serf dom vi Russia. Nor are the people of the ijou slaveboldiog States in any way responsi ble for siavery in the States which tolerate it, because as to that question they are as foreigu from each other as independent governments. 1 have labored in and for the Republican or* ganization with entire confidence that whenev er it should be in power, each and all of the States would be left iu as complete control of tbeir owu affairs respectively, and at as perfect liberiy to choose and employ their own means of protecting property and preserving peace and order wilbiu their respective limits, as they have ever been under auy administration. Those who have voted for Mr. Lincoln have expected and etill expect this. They would not hove voted for him had they expeoted oth erwise. 1 regard it as extremely fortuuate for the peace of the whole country that this point, upon whioh the ilepublicaus have been so long and eo persistently misrepresented, is now to be brought to a practical test and piaoed be yond the possibility of a doubt. It should be a matter of rejoicing to ail true Republicans that they will now have an opportunity of de monstrating to their political adversaries and to tho world that they are not for interfering with the domestic institutions of any of the States, nor the advocates of negro equality , or of amalgamation, with which political dema gogues have so often charged them. When ib' is shown, a reaction will assuredly take place in favor of Republicanism. The Soath ern na<nd, even, will be satisded; the rights of Northern men will.be respected, and the? fra | ternal feeling existing iu oldeu limes, when u.eu from all parts ot the country went forth i together to battle for a common cause against i a common enemy, will be restored. Disunion ists, per se, of whom unfortunately there has been a few in this country for some years, un derstand this, and are now in hot haste to get out of the Union, precisely because thay per ceive they cannot much longer maintain an ap prehension among the Southern people that their homes, and firesides, and lives, are to bo endangered by the action of tho Federal Gov ernment. With such 'now or never' is the maxim; hence they seek to inflame the public mind by misrepresenting the objects and purpo ses of the Kepubiicau party, with the hope of precipitating some of the Southern States into positions from which they cauuot, without dis honor afterwards recede, well knowing if they delay till after the new administration is in augurated and tested, it will furnish no cause for their complaints. Secession ia an imprac ticability, or rather an impossibility. The Constitution provides no way by which a Stato may withdraw from the Union —no way for & dissolution of the Government. It creates the general good, interferes but little with the in dividual rights of the citizen,except for pro i teetiou. It is chiefly felt iu its benefits and ! its blessings—not in its exactions. If every ! federal officer in South Carolina were to resign, tbeir offices remain vacant, and its Legislature declare the State out of the Uniou, it would j all amount to little except to inconvenience the ; citizens of the State. So loug as the State did not interfere with the collection of the ; revenue ou the seaboard, the people in other ! portions of the Uniou would not be in the least incommoded. What is the South Carolina >r !myto do when raised! Whom is it to fight? j Manifestly, if it commences a war on the Uni ted Slates officers engaged in collecting the revenues, it becomes the aggressor. This would be a revolution, and making war with out a cause, for South Carolina makes no j complaint agaiust the preseut reveuue laws.— Is she prepared for this—to become the ag gressor? The only use I can see for her Min ute Men is that they will enable the people the more readily to suppress auy uprisings in their midst whioh tbeir misrepresentations of purpo ses may have encouraged. She complains that the Fugitive Slave law is not executed in some of the States. This, if true, the whole coun try knows to be a sham. So far as South Car olina is concerned, she is so situatod that no slave can escape from her limits into free States. However much cause the border slave States may have to complain of the es cape of their negroes into the free States, it is clear South Carolina ean have DO suob com plaint. In her resolves she professes to be preparing to defend herself against encroach ments on her rights. Let her adhere to this policy and not attempt to dictate to other States what they shall do, aud no oollisiou will osour, for no encroachments will be made.— The disunion feeling in the South is doubtless greatly exaggerated. A sort of terrorism seems to prevail in some places, which for the time, appears to have erushed out any mani festation of Union sentiment; but as the causes for this excitemeut are ali itnagiuary, the elec tion of a Republican President, in the consti tutional mode, oertainly affording no excuse for it, it is reasonable to suppose that a reac tion will soon take place among the Southern | people themselves, whioh will overthrow the j uisumonists at home. It is a great mistake to class the supporters of Mr. Breckinridge as disaoiouists. Some BEDFORD. PA., FRIDAY. DECEMBER 7, 1860. few of them may be, but Mr. Breckinridge bimaelf and his supporters as a olass, are, I doubt not, as sincerely attached to the Union as many of those who, for political purposes during the reoent exciting contest, sought to fasten upon them the stigma of disunion.— Should the conservative and Union men in any particular locality, be uuable to eope with their adversaries, and South Caroliua or auv other State under the lead of nullifiers and disunion ists. who have for years bocu seeking a pie* text for breaking up tho Gove-nmcnt, plunge iuto rebellion, and without cause assail, by force of arms, the constricted authorities of the Union, there will be but one sentiment among the great mass of the people of all parties aud iu all parts of the country, and that will be that "the Uuton, it must and shall be pre served;" and woo to the traitors who are mar shaled against it. Mr. Trumbull oonoluded his speech with a fehearsal of the points which he conceived to bo gained by the election of Mr. Lincoln, and retired amid the most enthusiastic applause. Mrs. Lincoln gsve a reoeption in the eve ning, aud was visited, by an immense number of people. Mr. Lincoln leaves here at eleven o'clock to-day, and will arrive in Übicago at seven in in the evening, when there wiil undoubtedly be a demonstration of people to see him, notwith standing he wishes to travel quietly. Tho Statement of several Western papers, tha Mr. Lincoln constantly receives large numbers of threatening letters from the South is unfounded. Some indiscreet epistles have reached him, but outright blackguardism ana threats of violence are indulged in in only a few instances, aud these bear evidence of orig inating iu the lowest sources on their face.— Verbal and written requests to resign for the sake of the country have bees made by well meaning men anxious tor the preservation uf the Union, which were kindly received, but produced no effect. Sowing the Wind and Reaping the Whirlwind* The present monetary panic the East is a manufactured one. It has no warrant or justi fication in auy existing fact growing out of the state of trade either at borne or abroad. It was a panio deliberately got up before tho Presi de ctial Election, for tho purpose of soaring tho people of New York into voting against Linooln. It failed of that end, ignominioualy, but those who made it, found themselves, when the elec tion was over, unable to ooDtrol it. They had failed to scare tho great mass of intelligent voters of New York; but they had succeeded iu slaiming mooted men, or in so disarranging financial affairs as to alarm the most timid among them, aud now they are powerless to quiet that alarm. Thus what was at first intended as & mere political trick has become a financial ca lamity. The authors of it sowed the wind aud are reaping the whirlwind. Tuere never was so little oause for a panio as now. The whole North and West was never in so good a condition for being prosperous as now. With the best crop ever gathered in the coun try, aud a foreign demand for all tho surplus of it at good prices, the people were, at the time this alarm was,wickedly set on foot, in excellent condition to reap the benefits of their three years' retrenchment, which tho reverse of 1857 fastened on them. If there had been any ever trading, it was in the South. The North, the West aud the Northwest were all on a solid foundation, buying as little as possiblo and sell ing all they could. The eastern cities, too, were reaping the benefits of ali this. The sur plus of the bountiful harvest of 1860 was pour ing steadily iuto their laps, aud every available vessel was laid hold of to uarry it to Europe. Importations were falling off; the tide of gold was turning to us instead of from us: the North and West were paying off the debt which swamp ed them in 1857; and the railroads were grad ually emerging from bankruptcy,in consequence of the immeuse carrying trade thrown upon them. All these wars tha signs of unusual prosper ity; and a commercial panic, ia the midst of such evidences of comuteroial health, was, to use a haokueyed expression, like a clap of thunder in a clear sky. That the panio did not grow out of this state of things, is plain: and it would puzzle aoy commercial man to enumerate any other oauses tor it. The whole afiair is, as we have said, the re sult of tost wicked spirit which prompted a few New York merchants, under tne lead of Howell Cobb, the undisguised traitor to his oouutry who i setviog under James Buchanan as Sec retary of the Treasury, to stako the whole ooui merotal prosperity of the country upon tho haz ard of the political die. It was the last des perate chance to defeat Linooln, aod like reck less gamblers, tbey put it all up and have lost. If it was their loss, alone, no one would care. But, while trying to serve a political party with the aid of a momentary panio got up to order, they have involved the whole commercial com muuity. In toe nature of things, however, a panio based upon nothing—a manufactured pacta for political purposes, cauuot last long, It bad nothing to stand upon, at first, aud it has noth ing to feed upon, now. A abort time will suf fice to remove it. A commercial people, suf fering from terror in the midst uf unexampled prosperity, is a ridiculous as well as disgrace ful sight; and there is 100 much shrewduess in the commercial mind nut to cotuprobeud this fact iu the first cool moment that supervenes. The mcu who have partaken of the scare wiil then be ntuoh more heartily ashamed than tuey now seem to be terrified.— Pitts. Gaz. A youug widow who lately recovered heavy damages from a riob gentleman who bugged her somewhat rudely, should take oare of her money—for she made it by a tight squeeze. SOUTH CAROLINA IN 1532. Tho following extracts indicate bow General Jaokaon'a proclamation in 1832 was received ia South Carolina : From the Charleston Mercury, jDec. 17, 1832. The Declaration of War made by Andrew Jackson against the State of South Carolina occupies to day the larger portion ot our columns. It wiil be read with tho feelings whioh so extraordinary a document is calcula ted to excite. This uuhappy old man has been suffered by his advisers to arrogate the power to ceoroe a State of the Confederacy. He has issued the edict of a Dictator—an edict which time will prove whether he dares or can en force. Ho has attempted in this proclamation to intimidate the Whigs of South Carolina by threats, aud to encourage and fomeat insur rection aud violence ou the part of the inter nal enemies of the State. This document was received here yesterday, and greeted with the indignation and contempt which it merits. In every freeman worthy of the name it has ex cited uo other feelings but those of defiance aud acorn. Rocreauts will hail it as a brave biow iu the oause of treason. From the Charleston Mercury, Dec. 19, 1832. This crisis for which every intelligent and resolute Carolina Whig has loug been prepared is 3ouie. The effiac; of our remedy has been deotoustrated. We were told it would be in digent ; it has proved so potent that an in tubated administration has been oompelled, in despair of otherwise defeating us, to resort to btute force. We have always said that our remedy was of right pescelul—we never said tu*t it would necessarily be peaceful—it is always in the power of a bad man to outrage right by violence, if unrestrained by priuciple or fear of consequences personal to himself: Geo. Jackson has uot furnished the first ex ample. There has been a (Jsesar, a Cromwell, anu a Bonaparte men of towering geDius who have stooped to play the usurper. Why utay uot iufertor spirit without as much heart as either, and with none of tbeir genius, aspire to iuiuate them in those actious of their lives wiiLb aioue he can inmate, because they are crimtuai. Iu the Legislature, Mr. Pickens declared "hs believed the contest would end in blood. Thtsdoeuuueut of the President was none loss •..iso- fae edict of & tyrant, and if they were for war, he was ready, and it behooved all the citizens of the States to meet tho storm with beouiutug manliness. Ho, for one, never would submit—if di'iveu from tne seaboard, he was for carrying on the war iu the inierior; if driven from the interior, ho was for a guerilla warfare iu the mountains ; and if at last com pelled to yield, he would die oouteuding to the last drop ot blood he had to sustain the ordi nance, aud tho authority thereof, lie adverted to the doctrines contained in the proclamation, relative to the rights of the State, aud. was astonished that the President should attempt to seduce the citizens of the State from their proper allegtauce, and ia no measured terms deuouueed the whole procedure. He concluded by saying, that before South Caroliua should recede, he was for war up to the very knife, aud he was for riskiug all at every hazard on the die that was oast." The Panic aud the Southern 1 rade. The Baltimore Sun iu announcing tbe sus pension of speoie payments by the Baltimore Beuks, in a rather exulting spirit, says: "Those who have heretofore derided the South, and treated lightly both tbe provocation to which it has been exposed and its results, will realize the fact that the mere suspension of trade with the North and the coucentratiou by tbe South of ber iuterests within her owu terri tory, has oaused already a very serious embar rassment in the monotary affairs of the North. These indioations prove that the strength is with tbe South and iu ber resources: and iden tified with tho South the interests of our citi zens will be secure, and our position at onoe honored and prosperous." If this panto is to be attributed exclusively to the power whioh the South wields in tbe business and financial oircles, it is somewhat remarkable tbat its own people aro compelled to bear the brunt of the infliction. Tbe South ern oities, inoluding Baltimore, RlcLtuoud ami Charleston, were the first to yield to the pres sure, and tf we may rely on the statements of their own citizens, and suffering intensely from tbe "panio" which it has created. Now if the withdrawal of Southern trade from tbe North has anything to do with the condition of affairs according to any other mode of reasoning than that adopted by the secession parties, the South ern commercial centres would prosper at tho expense of those proscribed at the North That tbe suspension is only a precautionary measuro on the part of the Northern mopied institutions is rendered evideot by the faot that their credit has not beon impaired iu the least by the pro ceeding. On the other hand, the Southern bank issues are at a foarful discount, aud iu some instances are Dot received on aoy terms. Instead of these indications pToving the strength of tbe resources of the South, they clearly show its inherent weakness and its ab solute dependence on the Northern section of the confederacy, if in their blind infatuation they could be reached by reason or sensible argument, these contemners ot the Union might learn a useful lesson from tbe state of affairs around them, and finally beoome convinced tbat tbe union of tbe States is their only hopo of a I prosperous existence in the future. The logic of the Sun may do very well for the monoma niacs who are now "revelling in treason" in the alaveholdiog States, but it vriii not pass current with people in eithor section who are sufficiently sane to take a common sense view of the matter.— Pitts. Gaz. An Arkansas Traveler. A contributor to the Spirit of the Times, thus describes a scene at the Anthony House in Little Rock, Arkansas : "Late one bitter cold night in December, some eight or nine years ago, L. came into tho bar room as usual, to take bis part in whatever was going on. For some reason tbo crowd bad dis persed sooner tbsn was customary, and but two or three of the townsfolks were there, together with a stranger, who had arrived a half hour or longer before, and who, tired, wet and muddy from a long Arkausas stage ride, his legs ex tended and shoes off, was consoling himself with two chairs aud a nap opposite the centre of the blazing log fire. Any one who has traveled until 10 o'clock, in a rough winter night, over an Arkansas road, can appreciate the comfort of the fruition before that fire plaee. The drowsy example of the stranger bad its effect on the others, and L., who took a seat in the corner, tor a lack of conversation, was re duced to the poker for amusement. He pokad tbe tire for a while, until it got red hot, and becoming disgusted, was about to drop it and retire, when be discovered the great toe of the strauger'e foot protruding through a bole iu one of his sooks. Here was a relief to L. He placed x the glowing poker within a foot of the melancholy sleeper's toe, aui began slowly to lesseu tho distance between them; one by one, tbe others, as they caught tho joke, begar. to open their eyes, PUJ being awakeued, mouths expanded into gnus, and grins into suppressed giggles— and one iucoutineut fellow's iuto a broad laugh. Closer aud closer the red-hot poker neared to wards the unfortunate toe The heat caused tbe sleeper restlessly to move his bauds. L. was just about to apply the poker, when a souud of click 1 click! arrested his otteotion, He looked at the stranger —the latter, with one eyeopf i, had been watching his proceedings, and silently brought a pistol to hear upon L.— In a voice just audible, he muttered in a tone of great determination. "Jest burn it! Burn it! Jest bura it! and I'll be d—d if I don't stir you up with teu thou sand hot pokors in two seconds!" L. laid down the poker instauter, and re marked: "StraDger, let's take a drink! —iu fact, gen tlemen, all of you." L. afterwards said they were the cheapest driuks he ever bought. "SHE WORKS FOR A LIVING." Commend us to the girl of whom it is sneer ingly said, "she works for a living ;" iu her we are always suro to find the elements of a true woman—a real lady. True, we are uot pre pared to see a mincing step, a haughty lip, a fashionable dress, or bear a stting of spiendid nonsense about the balis and young men, the new novels aDd their next party —no no ; but we are prepared to hear the sound words of good sense, language becoming woman, neat dress, mild brown, and to witness movements that would not disgrace an angel. You who are looking for wives and compan ions, turn from the fashionable, lazy, haughty girls, aud select one from those who work for a living, and never—our word for it—will you ropent your eboice. You waut a substantial friend, and not a doll ; a help-mate, and not a help eat; a counsellor,and not a simpleton.— You may not be able to carry a piano into your house, but you can buy a spinning-wheel or a sot of knitting needles. If you cannot buy a ticket for the ball, you can visit some afflicted neighbor. Be careful, then, when you look for compan ions, and when you choose. VVo know many a foolish mau, who, instead of cboosiog an in dustrious and prudent woman for a wife, took 1 one from the fashionable stock, and is now j lamentiug his folly in dust and ashes. He ran i into the tire with his eyes wide open, and who ; but himself is to blame ? j The time was when the ladies went a visit ing and took their work with them. This is the reason why we had such excellent mothers. ; Ilow singular would a gay woman look in a ! fashionable circle daruiDg her father's atoek. iogs, or carding wool to spin ! Would not her companions laugh at her ? Aod yet such a womau would be a prize to somebody.— Blessed" is the man who chooses for his wife | from despised girls "who work for tbeir living." A Mighty River. The Amazon, the largest rivtr in the world, | ba on area of drainage nearly three times as large as that of all the rivers of Europe that empty themselves into the Atlaatio. This i plain is entirely coveted with a dense primeval foreßt, through which tbe only paths are those made by tho river and innumerable tributaries. Thisforestis literally,impenetiable. Ilumbolt rental ks that two mission stations might be only a few miles apart, aud yet the residents would require a day and a half to visit each other aloug the wiadiugs of small streams.— Even the wild animals get so involved in the impenetrable masses of wood (even tbe jaguar) tbat they live for a long time in the trees, a | terror to the monkeys, whoso domains tbey have invaded. The trees measures from eight | to twelve feet in diameter, aud the iutervals t are occupied by shrub-like plauts, which here, ! in these tropioal regions, beoomo arboreseot. ' It is navigable for two thousand miles from tbe VOL. 33, NO. 49. ocean ; it is neailv one hundred miles wide at its mouth, iu some pluses eiuht hundred feet deep, and its torreats projecis, as it were, into the ocean more than eight bandred miles, perceptibly altering it? waters at this distance from tbo American shore. FALLEN HUMANITY I Fallen humanity ! How sad the term !' What a dark ami fearful picture < railed up in these two words ! To be human as bum uj beings generally are, is bad euougb, but to be below (alii u ? is one of the saddest conditions in wbicb a mortal can be pieced. How fearful to tbir.it tbat life's rosy morn is at an end in night s raging tempest j that tbe fair, innocent babe <s to fill tbe drunkard's grave ; that the youthful will dio iu a garret from which the last ray of virtue went oat long ago ! Fallen humanity ! The mind draws from the contem plation of the scene of degradation and woe j the stout heart grows faint; tbe tearless eyes are dim, prayer ascends to God. Fallen huinauity ! What a death knell this strikes to the heart of many a one ! 'Tis a funeral of hopes and joys now fed with the flames of sin. 'Tis perhaps a mother's only son, a father's darling daughter, Oh! how large ate the Potter's fields, how many victims has fallen humanity ! "Help ! help !" riag io our ears from morn till night. Some poor being is perishing, some lamps of hope are goiug out. Why stand wo idle ? Rescue those that are sinking— turn tack the crowd and replenish the oil—light tbe lamps, and raiss the sinking one upon terra firma. Fallen humanity ! We see it written on the face of hundreds every day ; 'tis in tbe streets, the workshops—it fills our bar rooms, our jails, and hospitals. Then, to tbe rescue ! - Wait not, i there not enough work for us all t "Work while it is day, for the uight oometh when no man can work." A traveling agent, passing a farm, saw a boy at woik in the coru field by tbe roadside, and being of au inquiring turn of mind, he stopped bis horse and thus addressed the youth: "My eon, whose farm is this?" "Dad's," was the lauonio reply. "Does your father raise any stock?" "Ees, lots uv 'em. rt "What kind?" continued the stranger. "Corn-stocks, mostly," was the reply, as he proceeded to hoe a hill of the article, and the stranger went on bis way, musing. "I Cants to shippen der Lucila," said a for eigner to tho clerk in a shipping office. "Well," said the olerk, pen in hand, 'what's your name?' "It ish llaDs Vannaootebiastlnidtudnedars museighyporcbalkvenxquilgwpßiusewismDpluri- tp," said Duchy, gravely, spittiug oat his old quid and takiug in a fresh one. "Heaven!" said the clerk, "I can't write that. Look here, Mister, what is it in English, do you know?" "law, lob does. It ish Yon Stnidt." A little boy was sent up stairs by bis mother to get a satchel that hung behind the wardrobe. The bay returned without the required article. "Couldn't you find it?" asked the mother. "Yes, 1 saw it there, but " "Couldn't you reach it?"' "Yes, 1 could reach it, but "Why didu't you get it then?" "Because the old musket stood close by it," said the boy, shaking his head knowiugly, "and I was afraid it would suap right at me." COULDN'T FOOL HlM. —Soon after the tele- * graph was put in operatiou on tho lino of the Ohio and Mississippi Railroad, in Marion county, one of tho natives stepped ioto the of fioc and wanted to know the prioe of pork in Cincinnati. In a few moments an answer oame, with a charge of thirty-five cents for the in formation ; but the "hoosier" was too smart to be caught in tbat way, aod replied—"Ob, no, Mr. Telegraph, you can't, fool me that way. I'm not so green as you tbiuk lam ! That darned tickin' thing of yourn haiut been out of this room ; J watched it all the time !" EXTRAVAGANCE. —Give the ladies fnl! per mission of surpassing evin the lilies of the field in glory of apbearanoe. The press must stop its abuse of the women and look after the men. The extravagance of the latter in segars, brandy toddies, fasi trotting horses and doubtful luxu ries, is infinitely more ruicius than that of the ladies in laco and brocade ; the former is ruiu ous to health, morals and purse, while the latter only slightly damages the pockets of the "lords and masters." TIRED OUT. —A three-year-old nephew of one of my friends had finished his usual prayer at his mother's knee, when she raid—"Now, Willie, pray for your grandfather and grand mother." He did as directed. "Now for your aunts and uncles. His petitions wont up singly for each class. "Aod now, VVille, pray for alt the world," said his mother. Wearied out, perhaps, by tbe length, of his exercises, be immediately exclaimed, "Ma, it's just as much as i can do to pray for my own 'latiocs.*' 'Were you ever baptized?' inquired an earn est minister of a green candidate. 'N-n-no, sir,never, only onc't and then I fell in.' Why was Adam the beat ruuner tbat ever lived? Because he was tbe first in tbe human race. A French breakfast—two aait cellar* Md muffin.
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