The Demo ratic Watchamn. It L (. l' I THE MERRY LAUGH I lo‘ot to heatr 11 lull 1 , 111 111.111)11111 1 11111.1 tree A- littlit• Ott Ittut-tt of the sulttlq Aertts. 11. 0 .111.13' 'ell The merry Itmgh tow. 111111.1 111 html 11/11,111111 1 •1 , 1111. P 11111th. Aral 111 11, 1 P11111`1,1.1111 .1 .1 1 . Y nestles rglitn.l 1 1 11 hl ilrl'hlllll 1111 . men I.e.pt•al..a heart l%nh nllllll. One thni x ill I.lnlely d.. IN part .nn%lone in 111 The ni”.i.• or II Intl ',Ugh 7 , 0,414/4,1 heart. , no.. ,11111.. e• gleloll „el it 1010% Like slinnt.t on l lii Hit ii Tll , ll lel 111 , 111 0 11 V 6eig,ll ring out. l'pen the helm ur /11111 lel It. gliidee•.. 1.111 L. lie 1.1.1 intLielei me THE STREET ARAB I=l Won, ye.' I 111 It I r- A mail. t.lr Ag boluchost lised I s grl ' for kii lid )t•t Mould It Seemed I. Ind 0 . (111111) il ) 011ii .1 . ,111••• Inn tht• It VllOlll,l %Ir it .illll4. Intghly 011.1 . 1`. Nil - S. I'llollol t.. bits r 1 , 1 -I II k f ...rropt4—,tt I its 141 11.1 0.11 1,111 I tst limit. .1 ui.d .ut vs .1 .st Ls. Ice d vs. II•If r I ITI Imnl up and htr,l , k... 1 thllll.l. 11,• long ago 14.111, her Sunl II onle u hen them II ri I olg 1,1 ht,iti I Pay, 1.0. n 1 , 11,11 . fly pal. I , II tabl,ll ill" PIP ('nnn and lento nd la?! THE TEMPTATION I=l now beitutitul she wan' .is File came up the broad node. es en one turning to look at her, I among the rest I little thought 1 ally to meet my tate I had never seen such a tare It is tic perfect in contour, with a (1 , 1111.1et1011 nl trnosparent pun tt. nod the eels were of tbat deep s lolet blue, that is. Flo serf rhre Tenderness and refinement. and the ',oldest wo maiil.oll.l, F6oue out nl every linen !tient I bad In,l tears abroad, and I hail traseled l furs whi rem Ins o%i country, but I hat nest r liettire seen i•tit I, :in e sail n perlect blonde. Throughout the • %hole err mon I rtninineil Itkr one in a trainer I heard nothing. I saSS nothing lint 111711 lac e I Ills ed her him, that too men( I, the cold. 11111111.1 cynical, !tow of the . I, ttho 11cl - I.lOlON' LEVI tared Quit for us% tirutession , I histil this peeriess creature with the t (invent rated ardor 11l sears 1 11 11 . , ...1 "1.1 al.l riff I , r at,l that dies, at , 1111 ' , sr. reuitirl.ed • 11 hat a Leautiftil creature Mr IVlthingtott M wile 'Wlit re .11.1 they .1' I t kel, %%oh great Irexd i.teitling riser inv. 'ln the front few to our right Yon, hi-11,110os "II are. %%Wild pro 1 1/1111 , e Lrr hnr fallll It )Ifl.l Stilt .II li II HAI! *-1111 It ' IL.O I Ite‘vr 1.8.1' the 11111, , Sl , lllllll 111 the %%4,r1.1111 1,,e• ~ t.111111.1,,r411 It% `She Nirm. With ingt,m I I 'eft the table I uent array alone lor bon!, I .truggled again-t the I.a. mum 11411 11/14i 1 / 1 1,..111i,10 l war renOlsrd tO r rt.h it t mould I.ot be Con rented it via. titer a time I learned her idttnecabillt I rsen made her acyountanee then I became the intimate triton! of heron-band and again I !red 10 comitier ml ill fated Irate It it as of no at ail lint one honorable com,e remained tor no•. and !lint meta to go a,sa, arid and 111 114 w FrYlieM to find lorgolnl lie, More than (nice I spoke to my partner of my , Atmli to ira,el again in I mope, and to remain a 'ear or two in Vienna, at the hostotalm lint fir Potter %la, old, and relied on Tile al he (-mild not think rut Intl - mg./Ile, he ,and Irt rooms. I could not tell bun thettriie reit•cPli II) I MlAlell To go abroad' So it came to that I re trained. A tear went by. I had become 1,11 a wreck of my former self The lie cessary, constant guarding or every look andlact WAN wearing away my physical strength The war broke out Here, at latit, wan all excuse to go away. Surgeons were greatly needed in the army Even Dr Potter could gainsay iry de parture no longer I aan about to apply for a conimisaion, when I re ceived a professional nllllllllOllB to the IVilhinglon mannion. I bound the husband down with one of the worst cases of typhoid fever that had ever come under tiny experience. For dais his hie hung on a thread. NOw canine my great temptation I . (The night, when his delirium was the highest, I determined to remain till morning. His wife watched with one. Oh! what misery it was to sit there, and see her striving to talk with him, Werging him not to send her away—toipeak to her, his Elsie I He would laufli wildly and thrust her from him, and she would sink on her knee% by his pillow, sobbing as if her heart would break. At last lie became so violent that I begged her to leave the room. She re fused. Laying her band on my arm, she looked up into my face with a world of sorrow written in those eyes. 'Dr. Drifting,' she implored, 'you will save my husband 1 You must save him; he is my all I. Tell ine, is there any hope?' Tharpleading face almost unmaned Inc; and I needed all my strength thMi ; so I maid quietly :' 'I will do all I can. But this is only the begiuning of the sickness.' It N% ill he necessary Itir you. to husband all tour strength. Seek rest to:night. It" hero is any change lor the it once, I will call you.' .She left the room on this assurance watcheikby His' patient until the par o\)soi passed, and then, in that room. alone %yak the sleeung man, the Tempter came, Faint and wit* ering at firnt, e%olent ly trying the susceptibility id my heart and integrity of character. repolseii the thought with horror, It returned Aith double force, ith .thrtling t•ophn.try. It acid a be Hi easy to let hint die—die be would, nn mined by mere tilt ill, for consti tution be had none. \V lq not let Into die ? Then Elsie would be free I ,trosr against the temptation with all my idrength. Rut the TeMpter Cattle again, and gained ground The enormitv of the crime pas , ed itlNav 1 began to queqtion rtir-ell'a. to wha t )1111111i1 do, or, rather, should riot do, to obtain the do-fired eti. Alter the end, Ekie none, only tome! A movement Irons the patient, and the w,11,14, oh niv thoilied nrra 11l numl, an d me prorm-e. \Van I keeping it 9 10 , 1 . 11,1 %%tithed nerni— the room, Ntris mg to the liorrihile night mare Then e timer the react:on I -ant. to nit h nee' and prated, lira% eil Jro the tune praxed Jro -trengtli. strenzth to liiirrili'e temptation, and tor Jro glseni:--, tor lurid I not committed ninrdrr In 1111 heart" I le ' ,l IV , It the brand ,Sll , upon me I a.h. I for -trength to bait-11 Ott. eithl !.le. and for knowled , e to , a,e Land, tor ed he mint he, or I , hott ' l t.re , er think my,-ell an 14 , -a-,111. I aort,ed v4lth littn all nn4ht and ,% hen Ell+te cattle in early, there ea- a derided change for ;he bl.tter I Ini p.t flee n ow, I felt, le.t I ftliotil.l Ise tempted main. So I made my pre partition , to go away. My patient re Cos ered rapidly, and 1%/18 hOOll Out of danger I paid my la4t vitiit. I.lsie, putting her hand in mine, nail 'Doctor, I CJI n never thank )oti enoti2ll for the efforts you have made to time kolte Perhaps I may never see ion again. God bless and reward you' . This kindness WItR more than I could bear 'Pray for me, pity, forgive we l' I cried, ina(ll, and losing all control met melt, l utught her to my heart, took one last look at her white, .!fight rued face, and rushed from the house. 'fins is not a war story, , o I will brolly pass liner my life m the army I corked hard, I courted every danger , Int re( kless as I was, I could not die, death would not take me ' For lour Nears I heard nothing of 1.:14‘e. I had grown, at last, to con wider nay love na a thing of the pat•t. lint uo woman, I felt, aould ever 'be to uu• alum Five was It was SW' rllege ter tlrruk,of luny one occup3 lieL plane in ms heart I %%Its mustered out when the war ended I Itiec more I found fityselt at home M v old friends crowded itrouild nu•, all but 111 r. Withington. den, I asked it he had lett the .N 1 liN, II;~I, a I Ur Iliad? Ile ilk I (S‘ii . 1)1.11.1 \'here wnn his wile?' I 'tune to l'hiladelithia She was al nut-t broken hearted when Tier husband died, and tome frientL4 here 111141,41 yd upon lier . going to them. I had a let r r from her wily lit week Let MP see, I have It here, if you would like to t•lee it I new& the letter, tor, it open, noted the contents, and runhefl to toy room, rocerled to pack my %aline, an it lire or death depended upon my expedt I on That Journey to Philadelphia was the longest wnn life It was no hard to wait even torn ler.hourn, now that Elsie WAS free. I went up the marble i.tepn with a palpitating heart. Vet, nt ran ge to nay, no doubt of my euceenn occurred to me. My great love would surely as tike an echo in her heart, I natd to intnelt Ihe ha/ I, win/I,mm of the parlor /,proed t/ It 1..1111111111 COli4er,llll,l. I entered II Tilt rl, rare eX , at Heir, the choleemt flower of all • The molt carpet gave hack no echo to my lootsteps, and she did not perceive me, no abeiorbed was idle reading. She wenn° baGotiful, so much more heattoltil than ever, that the first glimpne of her face brought back, with overwhelming force, the love I had 1.0 long struggled to dektroy. I called, softly. She looked up. The color surged over the sweet face. Hieing, she came forward, and welcoAped tale, but with ern barramment. I led her back to her seat among the flowers, and standing there before her, told my story as best I could. I went on rapidly, lest my courage should fail. I told her all. How I first met her, and the result; how I struggled to conquer my love ; how I was tempt ed by the bedside of her husband; how I was saved from crime. She gave me a look of horror at this, and buried her face in her hands. I could scarcely go on. But the truth must be told, so I continued to the end. Then, with all the eloquence I possess ed, I pleaded my case. 'Only a look,' I said. 'Anything to give me hope for the future—" She gave no sign—no reply, but tears. 'Elsie,' I cried, in my anguish, 'ca n , you not lorgive me? Spare, oh I spare me another trial. I, who hare suffer ed so mach already I Have mercy and answer me At, last, she spoke. Laying her hand among 111 V once black locks, that %It'll. ',low prematurely gray , ,,ohu. 'Harold, I have pitietlymi since that night utl r parted, tears ago; sitter I have had a rtght have thought of you often, anti not 1---I think I Might lo‘ e 3 nu.' At laet, at hist, I had non lIIN heart 4 ile4ire! I caught her in one lon, embrace, and thitill«id God for giving toe such joy, utter sticli'morion. \\'e litt , c been imirried tine year., and ntt lite, since, been one of uriallo)ed liappoiesm. The pommessioo 1,1 titv wile ham kill me nothing to wi'h tor, and her Woe e‘ample has led toe to look ali faith to the (101 whit fo mercifully bleiiseil me, and whom I su long ignored. A Singular Fascination A \VOM tN I\ 1.01 E \VII II 1 WOM The Philadelphia gun lay IbBpalch voldnins an. account ollt aunuut 11116 any la , emated by a %%moan, nlimh moNt remarkable :is a pswhologmal study. A lads wa. one :d tie tenyhers at a school nt alntictonntrt toi% mand among her pupil.; my: asoanggirl ‘i ho be ca m e so a tt a ched to her t to be rest le. , s a ben not near her. and marked ,1,1:1 this lut e become that lier parent, iithdrew her :rum the -0:40 aiterv‘ard. , 'the teacher 1,. I he :Jr' tiallA!,vl/11,0to II .11 , 111111 itOVII. but pro , ed .ti rVtraCit , T 1 that nt 0110 uum the 1 , 1111C11,L1 11,11:11t 't :1•1 , 1.3h:t . to ..en,l her borne. he ‘‘otr' I not -411. h MR` wilier,. the 121. t ht It - her oi,l teacher—carne to the 10%11 for :1• 4 1lIIIII1oll learlier,WlllCll .I.e 10 her own, and her ocoa,on al % , ts to her old pupil were 11 0 lene !kint that.the girl became .ociable and attractable. The parents discovering that the.r daughter was again under the ititliirmee of the woman whom by do." time they cordially hated. with drew her trop school and took her ho me In th e nex t week the woman came to the %Wage in 'Ville)) tile pll rents resided and requested to be the gmerne-s, but was and another was taken in her place, where upon the girl became Nil ObStatrroll.4 that she up her books and threw them at the bead of the gonerness,wlio, not liking such treatment i , went her ways As no plausible reason could be urged against allowing the two to see each other occasionally, the strange woman was !permitted to visit at the house, until the parents became 51/jealollP of her that they actually drove her Irmo the town, although her con— duct had been unexceptionable. Let terswere exchanged, and as time pass ed the strange love seemed to increase and gain entire control of the girl's mind. Although she had grown to wo manhood she loathed the company of men, although she had numerous lov ers, would have nothing to do with them. Iler friend was in a distant town and hardly able to support her melfainl [hit/ Tact so preyed on the girl heart that she determined to go to her, and she did at last, although her pa rents discarded her for it The two worked together in poverty, and when at last the elder 'heft she said to her weeping friend "till! darling, turn away your face and let me Ihe Eight yells hat e passed since that time, hut her greet yet torments her, she sits alone and mopes all day long in her la her house, to which she has been nut „rued `he does not seem to be ll and phy 'demos think that in Buie she tuns recover from tier strange and melancholy idight, but her pa rents knowing her thoroughly, do not believe that she will ever escape the strange fascination of the dead. When Mr Dodge, electric phy mecum, wan !rehiring through the State on the lawn of bealth, he happened to meet, one morning, at the breakfast (able, a witty son of Erin, of the better class Conversation turned on the doc tor s lay mite muliject as follows "Per haps 3 eeti think I would be unable to convince tau of ihe deleterious effect of tea and coffee?" "I don'; know," said Erm ; "but I'd like to tie there when you do it said the doctor, "it 1 renvence you that they are Injurious to your health, will you abstain from their use?" "Sure and I will, sir "lime often do you use col fee arid tea ? ' asked the doctor "Morn lug and night, sir." "Well, do you ever experience it slight dizziness of the brain on going to bed Indeed I do." "Anil a sharp pain through the temples, in and about the eyes en the 111011111Ig " Troth, I do air." "Well," said the doctor, with an air of assurance and confidence, in his man ner, "that is the tea and coffee." "Is it indeed I Faith, and I always thought It was the whisky I drank " —The following story of Signor Blitz in told by the Springfield Repub. /tom us having happened in a train at Paltrier, some years ago: "As the cars stopped an apple boy rushed in, and Blitz, after patronizing him, cut open an apple and took a silver hall dollar out or it, greatly to the boy's astonish meat 'lt that is the kind of fruit you sell, I'll take another,' said Blitz,which he did, and lo I there was another hall dollar inside it. Blitz assuming great excitement, then asked the boy what he would twice for the whole basket of apples, saying it would be a grand spec ulation. But .the lad refused to sell even at five cents a piece, and, on leav• ing the station, Blitz saw him seated by the wall,cutting open hie unsold ap. pies in a vain search for silver half dollare." —At one of his lectures, George Francis Train shoute£l, "Now, then, anybody can ask me questione I" And a crazy Nancy got up and said, "litr. Twain, I would like to knpw writ makes a pot leg always burn in two in the mithUe r"rhe great American traveler MIA nonplussed. He was not familiar with the phenomenon. E %lathe KEbt —All interest ing,com notification, has recently appeared in the Boston Jourtud, giving the dates of the earthquakes that have occurred within the lath two years. The writ• er ens s that of great and terribly des tructive earthquakes only one each year have been registered as happeo inglrom 18(X) to 1865. In 67 and ISeiti, no !emit - than eleven e quakes, iniolving die loss of 0 . hundred thunsautd human beings, a r e jc pc n ie,l. In 18119 and 18'7,1 ; twenty-live serious earthipvikes °retired, but were"not nt tended with as destructive e&ets as those of the provion4 two years. 'Hiest facts it is argued, show that the earth has been passing through a perm I of< terrestrial phenomena more room kiddy than any which has been %% unessed by the prevent gen,ration, and that it is by no novms certain that the end of the earthquake term has been reached. The writer states that in the absence ofuny Hell estslilosried theory of the iuternal structure or the eartli t there is IM.reasing evidence for regarding fit rontld Ili' generally accepted belief that the earth's interior is a fiery mid ten miss l'his latter theory, it is ar gued, is the only ohe that tairl ae counts Gar all ye !ailed pile!) 111(111/1 alt V.lll6tll.llht ll, as 1 . 1• It 011 HI& 'aft h ., =art It e he optis also adviioa ted (hat the great lick of 1867 and 1.6. were caused lit the breaking off iit immense taster. (it sohil earth [row tier her crust, whirl' Islling into the heel- g (Asa below, agitated n into gi ;two trebling and rolling ashes th a t hen , ed the outer crust 'with great (rob- and throes. k Rllll ot l'iri The Neve ir'ea , t+ i'tt-ayttne relate- the follow A di-tress and 3 dyvrc It , albs late nitsiortune is a character Nth.' 01 one of our city magi.trates It is very seldom want appeals to him in %aim and his hand Is as open ns a day to inciting charity. NY t long since lie was called on by a deaf mate, and so perfectly 111,1 the poor boy excite his compas,.ior that he bestowed money upon bun lihiernlly, dressed him up in an elegant suit of clothes, and took him to his residence. Finally, the mute went away, and the tender heart ed magistrate bade him good bye with a tear in his eye. And very kindly did he speak of him afterward, and wished the youth every success nt life. Time went on and he heard not,bing more of his protege until one mort{ing, in pas sing by the lock up, the angry deaunc•i %lions of a prisoner excited his atten tion. The bitterest anathema, the di rest curses rang out with the fluency of a country lawyers' rhetoric. Sur prised at rinch an incessant flow of blur• phemy, the good judge took n peep at the prisoner. 'NV }Tar he exclaimed, 'am I inista• ken? Are you not a mute V lie asked, recognising his protege of a few weeks be lore. '1 used to be, but I ain't now.' 'Why, how did you get cured 7' 'Well, to tell you the truth, people troubled me no much with pity that I gave up the bunotesa The judge, since Oleo, 1-1 rather in. credulous ni cane of very great little tom. TUE BIRTII OF "EVANCELINE. " -Mr. Field in the March Atlantic tells this anecdote of Ilawthorne• Ile dined one day with Longfellow, and brought with him a...friend front Salem Alter dinner the friend said . 'I have been trying to persuade Haw thorne to write a story, based upon a legend of Acadie, and still current there, the legend of a will who, in the disper%oos ul th. has., was sepa rated Irmo her and passed her life in waiting and seeking for him, and only found lion .I%ing in a hompi tal when holt% wet.. old: Longfellow wondered that this legend did not strike the fancy of II iwthorne, and said to him 'lt vOll have really made up your mind not for a story, will you give it to me for a poem?' 'Co this Ilawthorne assented, and moreover promised not to treat the subject in prose till Longfellow had seen what he could do 'krill it in verse. And so he gave •Evangehne' ni bean meters—a poem that will hold its place in literature while true affection lasts Ilawthorhe rejoiced in this great success of Longfellow, and loved to-count up the editions, both foreign and American, of thin world renowned poem. - - A ludicrous incident lately or cureed iii a Mississippi steamer, which we relate as a warning to those who at tempt to change the personal adorn ments which nature has given them A man who wax journeying, to Texan with his wife thou lit he would enjoy the luxury of a edr oning. While this a am going on I neluded to sur prise his wife, and his request hair eyebrows, and whiskers were changed from a firey red to raven blackness. Ile Hasletl to his stateroom, but was met at the door by his spouse, initrag ed by the intrusion of a stranger,as she supposed, and ad in tun rice refused. Il e called himself her husband ; she said lie was RI, impostor. Ile attempted to explain. It was useless A crowd gathered around, and the laugh became general. At last, in his perplexity,the booster exclaimed, "Sallie, look at my feet I" One glance at the pedal appendages as/lured her. "Yee, John," she said, "I know them feet.. They can come in, but keep that. head out. of eight." --A Qewspaper back East tells of a subscriber who stopped a paper, and in lees than a week was kicked by a mule so severely, that hie Wel@ de spaired of. you keep a mule always maintain friendly terms with hie relations. —That colored lawyer in London is eaid to resemble "aload of charcoal after a snow storm," when he puts hie white wig on. An Elopemont—Remorse of Consoi- CM About four years ago James. Towu send, of Pochaliontas county, West Virginia, eloped with his brother Kzelciel's wife. The disconsolate Ezekiel started in pursuit qf the fugi• live, hut, alter an unsucceskfut hunt of a week or two, he returned-110nm 10 lament, in (he solitude of his widowed house the inconstancylul fickle woman. The loving couttle crossed over into Ohio, all the way on toot, where they tarried for awhile, seekitig that conju gal always dreamed of but never by truant lovers. They N .H. ed n, stakes crossed 'the father of wa iVin' and still pushed on, and pitched the'r tents -in the neighborhood of Omaha. Ruth after awhile, James became tired of the felicities of married The idea allaying to support a wile --and she another man's wife, too-- was too much for him. Remorse of voncience preyed upon his mint!, Ile too late, that he hail destroyed the happiness of a brother's household only to bring additional care and grief to himself. Willing to make what amends he could, he resolved to re turn with his stolen wile and restore her to the bosom of her iiu' I.n I and his injured brother, ro hack be came, bringing his fair charge along. A few weeks ago the widowed Eze kiel, having cooked and elite,' his breakfast alone, washing the dish es , lilted tip hi+ ere , and looking toward the door helie!.l the tomer partner of 61+ .)OYs ., . his long lokt wile Either suppo.ing it to be an apparition, or unwilling to have los affections blasted again, he lied through the other door, leas mg the inron.tant wife to Iry life ithoiLto partner for a spell . Ile has not beiTi heard of some. —(,recnbrter, lII'. Fa.) Independent. A 'Muscular Christian.' Ntory IN told by the Boston Traveler" I.lonie few years ago . 0.-gentleman who was employed a 4 Superintendent in a really charitable institution in New York:A:tint into one of the mark ets of that city and selected a quarter of beef for 'home consumption.' 'Shall I send it home for you ?' ask ed the market man. 'No, I thank you, I will carry it my self.' The market man regarded hire with nn incredulous look, and remarked 'What, you carry 11 whole quarter of beef?' 'Ye4, Air, was the quiet responme 'The market man again regarded Ilia emitomer aith atteomm, and 110 111011 t made np htw mmd that li e waw overratiag hie mirenetli. Then he maid— 'Well, sir, it you 1%111 undertake to carry tlin4 quarter of meat 1,r . 1 . y10 your melt I will give tt to you tor rlolthur g ' 'Are you eerioumr nm Berioum,' replied the mark et. man. returned the east° . mer, 11,1 s is the rase, just help mr to get it MI WV back, and we'll nee it I can't carry IL Thin Wan I/I uir,au l without let low!) or rest, the geml-man earned it to the institution with which he wain oonneet rd, the market man aevompanying hien, rout in amazement at the unex, peeled development of strength and en• durun.•e (hi another ()erasion the name mils cular Cirt,istian,having piirchamed twen ty live pairs or slioeg hor the institution under him rare, began gathering them together in order to carry there oil "Are you," maid the merchant, "go ing to carry:theme home yourself ?" "Certainly, I 111 " way the reply, "arid if necessary would carry twenty five pain! more " The - merchant looked thoughtful for a moment, and then turning to clerk (he knew the occupation of him cumtanieri maid "John, you may pot or twenty five pairs more or those Nhoem for Mr. T.— And .lohn, It not make any chat - Ike lor them or cotir4e the customer who had car ried the quarter of beef did not fear to mhoultler fifty pairs of mlitteq This wrong 1111111 --ntrottg iti faith an 111 works--is the ifev It t. Tolem,now and for some yearto hack the efficient maperintentlent of the !hone for the Little \Vandererm in doll city. T lort , ri Nripr Jul pr licpm ler get- t•I HellMllile I '.141 . 4 II Wl , l r-11-,llg, 111. Wlll , . 1i,11411V udveri _ Wll m II jun linve n tiling, advertise I.t. If you don ' t. ' If you doi, i mean to mind your own buminenn, it will not pay to advertise Never run down your opponent's goods in let loin 410 lon own It n nue. of adveriiining ae of ally thing elae in the world—if it 11l worth doing at all, it iy worth doing .well. You can't eat i-nongli in one week too taxi a whole ye.tr, and you can't ailvertiae on that plan either. A large advertisement once, and then discontinued, creates the impression that the man had fizzled. Injudicious advertising is like fish ing where there's no fish. You need to let the lines hilt in the right place. II you can arouse curiosity by an ad vertisement, it is a great point gained. The fair sex don't hold all the ouriosl• ty in the world. People who advertise only once in three months forget that moat folks can't remember any thing longer than about be 111 days. Sir Boyle Rohhe once said, in refer ence to persons, all relations to each other but wbo happened to have no descendant', that 'it seemed to be he reditary in the family to have no chil dren.' —An Irish editor congratulates himself that "half the lies told about him ain't true." An Sorts of Paragraphs A leading article—A blind man's (IOG. To protect tho Ghost— Put n lock on A water spout—A temporanco oro Lion. A game every hou6e ploy~-,A gene of drew. An eclipse of the sun—Cut oft with outs penny. Advice to fish otaors—Deal gently with Om herring. IL is bettor to carve your name on {worts than marble. Heavy tragedy Murdering n man meigbing4so pounds flurrying, an editor is denoinintua,l n pnpr r wedding. "\Vords that burn"—(layenne:peppe r and Dutch mugtard An inclined plain—An ugly woman with it Grecian bend. Difficult punctuation—fatting a atop ton gossip's tongue. Hays the elements a right to brew a storm without a license, Tlro flowers of spoech spring from the root of tho tongue A monarch who ought to bo 'brought down'--Old King Coal Every uninarrii.d . Indy of forty ha. passed the tiara) of Good Hope When a man is crusty, is it right to ile•eribe his temper Ili tart? When is a Hack dog dot a him Is dog , When it N a greyhound A game often heard of, but never played—Cricket on the hearth When ft man snores in his deep, I. the eound vocal or instrumental' When i. soup likely to run not .1a genet. pan 7 IVhon there is n leek in It The dews of nature only come In sum mer , hot dues of notes come at all wa. sons 1t is an oven chance now,whetlwr a man gets into States Prison or Con- DM When is a hackman liko a carpenter implement 7 When he's a .crew-drsver. Theory may be all very well, lint voting doctors and lawyers prefer prac tice. A nursery must be a great place fur dancing—it being generally a regular bawl-room It H tho little things of this life that plartio Nluskeeterd are 'runty, e 1... pliant., skew.. The opinions of the press of North Carol 111/1 are called by local papers 'spir its of turpentine.' Dodge clubs are becoming fashion able in our largo cities. The mkobers 10..11.r,e their creditors A face which constantly advertises the •toulach-echo is attractive only tc tho.e in the medical line To lady railroad traveler —For tnfor• matron revecting the last train apply to the leading drew' maker A 13,Nton woman declares herself hap py and contented, We/11PM 11110 has thir teen eats and loves them all TO %ILA has n new game in cards—ono 1111.‘ n revolver and the other hold{ the a•ardx. A coroner holds the inquest IVe aro afraid we shall loose brother (;reely before hong II e says tie receipt for a long lire is a blameleas ono An A tiOritlian inn-keeper display.; on 1118 big!' tho words, 'the physical basis of lire served up w all styles here ' An exchange In Counting up Congress man Bowen's wiveq, sari there are yet thirty-fine more Slates to hoar from The reason tingle Is an many shoep howl) in existence is because such a MI 111 her Of children are , perfect hltic InmLa ' A young lady wont Into a meek storo and asked the clerk if ho had 'Loving ' 110 replied, 'I am told 10 by the girk Why don` M 199 Anthony . keep lectur ing; nn , The question Settlnd 7' ir tho question is settled, why stir It up all tho tune? Undertakers have a hard time When tai%ine.s is dull, they dare not emnplain, when it is brisk they are afraid to boast. Don't let your cattle stray ; they often wander to the mart mtrtenoui places , we °nee saw a cowl ids Ina shoe maker'. shop After all, there are only two sorts of d1.e11,405, says a French doctor, of one of which tell die, and the other of which you don't se" There is tt Ind ef our negottintattett, who rognitl, hunger and the chttti•ting rod tt• Ithoelt the silltle thing; both matr t h., boy holl«r ”111. hurt 4111.1 to Jerrold, 'I hero jtivt hod some cairn tall boup,' when the wit replied, 'Well, exttines do meet 811111etinne8 In hot summer., when there is mo-,t thirst, there are fewest brooks, No of many pooplo's V.I)/II ity, it ie rurvst when most noodod Lydia Mason, of Kentucky, crimped her hair with a too hot iron, and now goes bald. Up this way ladies take olf their hair to crimp it. Tho girl of the period is accused of being too practical. And yet at a glithoo at her chignon proves how fond she is of building castles in the air. The editor of a newspaper out toward Lake Ohamplain, has discovered a way from keeping eggs from spoiling. 1103 method is to eat them while they aro fresh. A wile in St. Joseph shot her hus band through the arm, the other dny, because lie promised to buy her a night gown witth a three feet trail, and didn't. A countryman, In a short discourse on love, says. "It does 'pear like the girls go hal f-wo, but 'pears likes team of "nen couldn't draw, 'em Vother half.' Some people ( are never content. After having 411 their lambs broken, their hands smashed, and their brains knock ed out, they will actually go to law and and get more damages. lowa school ma'ams aro credited with presence of mind. When a cold boy gots too near tho stove, and the bole of hie pants catches tire, they sot him In a bucket of water.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers