816-Lancaster Farming, Saturday, April 29, 1995 The Berks County Dairy Prin cess pageant is scheduled for May 6, at the Berks County Agricultur al Center. The trio of contestants includes Jennifer Davis, Carrie Hetrick, and Shei. y Hoffman. One of these girls will be crowned dairy prin cess by Melissa Bicksler, the cur rent Berks County Dairy Princess and State Alternate. Jennifer Davis is the daughter of Ray and Frances Davis of Lees port. She is a freshman at Penn State Berks Campus. Her family owns and operates their dairy farm. Carrie Hetrick is the daughter of Randall Hetrick and Ms. Cynth ia Hetrick, of Oley. She is current ly a freshman at Penn State Berks Taking Time by Lehigh Co. Extension Agent Rebecca Escott Standing up to Bullies As a kid, did you hate going to the bus stop? Well, my “bus stop” was at the end of a long farm lane, and the only people there were my brothers and sisters, but for some Idds the bus stop is a dreaded place. For others, it’s the cafeteria or school parking lot. Why? Because bullies hang out there. “Bully"—the tough kid who picks on the underdog incessantly. If I were in charge, bullying would be outlawed. During elementary school years, physical aggression among peers tends to decrease, but verbal abuse, insults, and threats increase. There may be lots of rea sons why bullies choose to intimi date others. Two of the most com mon are that they are seeking attention (any way they can) and that they are insecure. By putting on a “tough” face, they try to cov er their self-doubts. Others act out continually because they have a reputation to uphold or they may be angry about something else in their lives and another child hap pens to get that anger dumped on them undeservedly. But knowing that doesn’t make the problem go away, and if your children or grandchildren are the brunt of their bullying, you want to do something. Adults can help in this situation. They can help by teaching children skills to cope and respond appropriately. In most cases, having an adult come in and “fix” the problem does not solve the problem long-term. The first strategy is to teach children to respond to the situation using a problem-solving approach rather than a power stance. Child development expert, Janet Gonza lez—Mena describes this process. She recommends that parents teach children to respond asser tively, but calmly. Don’t match anger for anger or taunt for taunt, because the bullying will escalate. Unless there is physical danger, it’s best if adults don’t intervene, rather teach children to express their feelings. A firm, “I don’t like it when you grab the ball from me” and moving on to solve the problem is a better approach. If the sides are uneven, adults arc encouraged to stand byh child as she expresses her feelings. Berks County To Hold P< Campus. Her father manages her grandparents’ dairy farm. Sherry Hoffman is the daughter of Barry and Karen Hoffman of Oley. She is a senior at Oley Val ley High School. Her family owns and operates their dairy farm. Megan Phillips, the Berks County Little Miss, will crown her successor from the following girls, Anne Hartman, Tiffany Hartman, Margaret Heller, Kelly Rohrbach, Melissa Schuller, and Cassandra Spatz. The Dairy Princess festivities begin with a dairy cocktail hour followed by a catered banquet at 7:00 p.m. Tickets are available by contacting Barbara Grimes at (610) 488-6148. Research about teens who become involved with violent crimes shows that most people resort to violence only after they’ve run out of other ways to solve a problem. Another way you can help your child deal with bul lying is to play “What if.” Ask the child, “What if Jeremy pulls your bode bag off your shoulder and says nasty things to you tomorrow in the hallway? What could you do?” Often children come up with the “angry” ideas first “I could hit him.” In order to get them to go beyond that parents should say, “Yes, you could. What else could you do?” After a list of at least six different ideas are generated, go back and discuss each suggestion by saying, “What do you think would happen next if you did...” This teaches children to evaluate options. Remember, sometimes kids don’t know what will happen, so they fear trying it. For instance, what might happen if you turn around and walk away? Gonzalez-Mena also reminds parents that “bullying victims” don’t just happen. They are created. Here’s how she suggests you can help a picked-on child break the cycle. 1. Don’t blame the victim. Although he may unconsciously attract attention, it is not his fault. He doesn’t “deserve what he gets.” 2. On the other hand, don’t lav ish attention on the victim either, or he may fall into that role simply to get your comfort and undivided attention. Provide calm assurance and care without going to excess. 3. Teach the child to prevent aggression before it happens by choosing safe places and people. In the face of danger, stay in an area with other adults or have a “safe” store, home, or play area to go to. 4. Teach children phrases to say to stick up for themselves. “I don’t need to spend time with a person like you.” “It’s not okay to hit people even when you're angry.” 5. Support children who do stand up for themselves by mak ing sure the aggression will not be repeated. In addition to teaching your children skills to cope with the bullies in their lives, you also need to reaffirm, reaffirm, reaffirm. Tell them and show them how much you love them. Say things like, ‘T’m glad you’re here, a part of our family.” “I love who you are.” “All your feelings are okay with me.” “You’re lovable at every age.” “I believe you can be creative and competent.” Contestants for the Beitcs County Dairy Princess Pageant, from left, are Jennlffer Davis, Berks County Dairy Princess Melissa Bicksler, Carrie Hetrick, and Sherry Hoffman. Arthritis Awareness The Central Pennsylvania Arthritis Foundation has announced the third Annual Dr. Nathan Sussman Arthritis Aware ness Day to be held May 7, from 12:00 p.m. to 5:00 p.m. at the Her shey Medical Center, 3rd Floor. News on the latest treatments, improved ways of managing day to day challenges faced by those suf fering from arthritis and updates on research developments and progress will be highlighted at this event Registration is not necessary, but is suggested. There is no registration fee for attendance and parking is also free. For mote information, contact the Central Pennsylvania Chapter of the Arthritis Foundation at (717) 761-0900. 18th Annual Cumberland Valley &cAuctionsatej May 5 816, 1995 ■ Food Concessions ■ Craft Show (5:30-9 pm) * Heifer Sale ■ Winross Trucks & Collectible Toy Sale * Breakfast (7-9:30 am) • General Merchandise Auction (8:30 am) * Craft Show (8:30 am-3:30 pm) * Quilt Sale (1:30 pm) * Chicken Bar-B-Que * Children’s Activities ■ And much more! 1/2 MILE NORTH OF Marion, PA US ROUTE 11 & SOCIAL ISLAND RD SPONSORED BY SHALOM CHRISTIAN ACADEMY FOR INFORMATION CALL (717) 375-2223 John Deere Equipment Sales & Service 3213 Black Gap Road Chambersburg, PA 17201 717-263-4103 Ida’s Notebook Ida Risser We have had a cool spring and our garden is rather slow starting. Our sugar peas are six inches high now but we expect them to get to be six feet high. Of course, this requires a fence but then they are easy to pick. My husband has been taking very good care of his asparagus bed and he expects a bumper crop. For years he was too busy with farm work and the patch got quite weedy. It kept me busy to keep the weeds out of our large garden. Years ago, I raised peas and straw berries to sell to the neighbors in the nearby development. Now it seems these folks no longer freeze vegetables or make jam from fruit Again we have a fox and five little ones in a wooded island. It is probably the reason that there are so few rabbits. But they have not bothered the squirrel population as they are everywhere. It has even CLUGSTON AG & TURF, INC ant Edgar J. Stull AUCTIONEER This Ad Sponsored By: been reported that a coyote was sighted across the river on a hillside. Our bluebird houses have been emptied and are ready for new comers. So far. I’ve only seen one pair but several pair of Jenny Wrens are investigating. This spring I ordered so many plants and bulbs that there were not enough flower beds to put them in satisfactorily. Allen was kind enough to rototUl two areas of the lawn to give me more space. If they give flowers that are half as pretty as the pictures in the catalogs, I shall be pleased. It is nice to have our grandchil dren home from their week in Chi cago visiting their other grandpa rents. Now I’ll be taking care of them several times this week as a friend is being married in Washington, D.C. It seems there is always some activity to attend. MARTIN’S EQUIPMENT CO General Farm Supplies 537 Falling Spring Road Chambersburg, PA 17201 717-263-3505 ( \ > t V
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